It hurts like hell thinking about the HF cufflinks.

I’m sure people are mad bc Hawk didn’t give Tim a true present like he did with Lucy. Not to mention it came with a work request and a break up after that.

But we can see this differently. It’s gonna be a long rant (again), so we’ll have it after the cut.

Lucy’s Tiffany bracelet. Fancy, flashy, something you can easily buy anywhere. A luxurious piece of jewelry that can be a perfect gift for anyone, yet it had no connections with Hawk.

And we have HF the cufflinks. It means they were specifically made for Hawkins Fuller, they were personal to him, something belonged to him only. He used those cufflinks for a long time now, and I’m sure he liked them very much. It might be spontaneous, but Hawk still chose those cufflinks as a goodbye present for Tim.

From Tim’s expressions, he was touched and surprised for a bit. He gifted the cravat to Hawk without any thoughts of having something in return. Seeing the cufflinks, he realized them at first sight. They had dents, which meant they had been with Hawk for years now.

Though Tim must have known his present was not bought for him, he still cherished them very much I’m sure. Something used to be so personal to Hawk now belonged to Tim. The present itself was truly one of a kind.

Hawk had known what was going to happen next, so maybe he just wanted Tim to know that:

You own a part of me, just me only. I hope you remember us.

And Hawk owned something of Tim’s too. He wore the cravat to the polygraph test, he wore it when having a drink with Marcus, and he wore it when he was at the Christmas party with the Smiths.

In their later years when Hawk and Tim were separated, Hawk always wore the plaids because it reminded him of having Tim near him, even though he’s not near him. So my headcanon is every piece that reminded him of Tim, Hawk kept it near his heart. Just a proof that his sweet love was still with him after all this time.

Hawk was madly in love with Tim. But his love had to bear the burden of every matter in this world. In the end, he chose to hurt them both.

It’s 5:30am here and who needs sleep when we can stay up and talk about s03e06 Jamie and Roy?

Friendly reminder, Jamie used to have Roy’s poster on his wall when he was a kid. To every young kid out there, the one on their wall was their hero, a role model that they strive for every single day. Jamie grew up thinking that someday, he’d be like Roy Kent. You know, the Roy Kent who played for Chelsea, which arguably the most successful club in London, the Roy Kent who won a fucking European Champions League. This precious and reputable UCL trophy is the dream of every footballer. Some would measure a footballer’s success by how many prizes they got, and believe me, this trophy is a rock solid proof.

Jamie is a great player with so much talent, he signed for Manchester City (a real deal in EPL), and he also made it to the team line up every damn time. MC is always known for their squad-depth in every position, and it’s not easy to always be on the starting XI list. I’d like to think that Jamie looked up to Roy a lot, he keeps training and training, with a hope til some day he could win trophy just like his role model.

Jamie finally got a chance to play alongside Roy. He must have been crazy about it. But their early days was not so easy. Jamie came to realise Roy had changed, he was no longer the one Jamie idolised so much as before anymore. He felt angry and disappointed. Jamie became the one in charge of the locker room, directly against the team captain. Things weren’t going well.

Luckily enough, the new manager came and steadily alternated the locker room tensed atmosphere. Both Jamie and Roy acknowledged their own problems, as well as the other one’s. They finally understood each other better. That hug, oi, it was like a big smash to the final concrete wall between them. It was not the action coming out of a spur of the moment. Roy felt the urge to comfort his team member, his younger lad, his friend. He knew a hurt Jamie needed that.

This season saw a further change in their relationship. They trust each other more and more. And this time, they even open to each other about their utmost vulnerable thoughts and memories. Roy and Jamie are not the type of people who would share their feelings to somebody else. Roy hid them under his rage, while Jamie just suppressed them because of his “dad”. For the first time, Roy admitted that he let out all of his anger on Jamie, sometimes for no reasons. And goshhhhhhhh, Jamie did not even question that, he shrugged it off immediately and literally said “For Grandad”. Such a beautiful char arcs from both of them. In return, Jamie also share some of his traumatised and heartfelt memories with his “dad” and mom. I don’t think he ever told that to anybody, even with Keeley or Ted. So this is a positive sign for their mental health, and I love to see men talking about their feelings like true heroes.

These football himbos are taking up spaces in my mind. And honestly speaking, I’ve been really sad and disappointed and depressed while watching an actual football club recently, and another lighthearted fictional football club is making my days a lot better. So guys, say thank you to Ted Lasso!

I need Michael to come back asap.

He needs to hold Colin in his arms and comfort him. Colin lies next to Michael and tells him about Isaac. He knows his best friend won’t out him but it pains him to think Isaac will treat him any differently, especially when he left like that without a word. Colin doesn’t want to be seen as a total stranger nor put burden on Isaac about apologising for what was already happened.

At some point, Michael caresses Colin’s hair, kisses him on his forehead, and says in the softest, most tender voice ever: “Hey hey, don’t worry. Isaac will figure things out, I promise. You guys will soon be the same as before, maybe not the same same, but he’ll understand you. Even if he won’t, you still got me.”

Colin smiles, and he snuggles closer into his fella’s embrace.

That’s it. Or else you guys have to pay for my therapy.

I mean some people clearly do not pay any attention to the show they are watching because what the heck??

1. Lucy is not the villain. She’s not trying to get in the way of Hawk and Tim, ever.

Gosh the sheer amount of hate towards her the past two weeks is insane. How come women in every gay show always receive the hate? Well, maybe some writers were actually lazy and the fastest way the could think of was to villanize women so they could have less a problem to think about. But this is not the case for FT where every character shows their own color, and they have reasons for every action they take.

Yes, she married Hawk. But it was bc everybody expected them to do that since, idk, the very beginning? Bc she adored him and trusted him enough? And not to mention Hawk asked her to marry him? Remind y’all, she’s also the victim of the era.

Yes, she burnt Tim’s letter. It was crazy enough to hear your own mother lecturing you to shut up about your husband’s outside behaviours as long as he comes back home at the end of the day. But actually receiving a letter from his ex-lover, whom is a man, saying that he was still in love with your man, was on another level! Lucy had every right to confront Hawk and made a fuss about everything. Yet she was so calm and reasoned, knowing that if she threw a tantrum then everybody’d know her husband was gay and they’d all suffer. Lucy knew for a fact that even if Hawk did receive the letter, he wouldn’t have done anything at all, so nothing changed.

And I love that she told Tim about it. She did not regret anything, nor felt any shame, just a plain announcement that she knew everything from the start of this marriage already. She did what had to be done. She could’ve been upset with Tim for bringing danger and misery to her family, but she just simply told him about the letter and let the man go. Splendid writing!

2. Hawk is gay. Hawk is not bisexual.

Never know I have to clarify this obvious fact. Him being married to a woman and having sex with her does not mean he’s bisexual. That’s just what gay men do to hide their true nature and to live peacefully in this world. Maybe not the US, but many countries nowadays still do not approve same-sex marriage, and queer people still have to marry someone they don’t love just to have “a shield” to cover for themselves. Has Hawk ever shown any interests in women? No. Has Hawk ever had sex with another woman besides his wife? No. Was it true that all of his sex partners now and then were men? Yes. So, that’s your answer. He’s gay as fuck.

3. Hawk is not the only person to blame. Tim is also at fault.

Roast me later, hear me out.

Hawk is a shitty person, I agree. He has done so many cruel things to his lover, his wife, and his child, and he continues to do so bc he’s a shitty person.

But, after all the shitty things Hawk did, Tim came back to him. Hawk warned Tim about their relationship very early. “But Skippy, that’s all it was, that’s all it can be. I’m sorry.”. Tim was soft for Hawk, so he accepted that easily. He’d love to love, rather than not having love at all. Hawk broke up with Tim on the day before Christmas, he was prepared to end it all so that Tim wouldn’t rely his emotions too much on him. For some reasons they got back to each other again, only to be separated one more time 6-7 months later. Tim made Hawk promise not to write, yet he was the one to break the promise. 14 years later, Tim couldn’t help himself but seeing Hawk again, sneaking outside his house just to witness his “happy” family. He was aware of the pain and guilt, but he was so lost in love, his “consuming love”, he gave in every time.

I know Tim did not deserve any of this, he had a pure heart and he gave it all to Hawk. That’s why we love him, and we feel pity for him too. But he had choices he was not willing to make, so it’s on him too yk.

4. There’s more to Tim’s guilt.

After jerking off with Hawk, Tim immediately forced Hawk to leave him. But why people only mentioned that it was bc he felt guilty with God? I believe he had 2 things to be sorry for. 1 is the reason everybody was talking about, God. The 2nd one, I’m pretty sure he felt guilty towards Lucy too. He couldn’t hold himself, he missed his man so damn much, and he let his heart took over for a sec. Tim knew he shouldn’t bc that was so wrong, and he did something really really awful to someone who’s having a wife and two children at home. He hated himself for it.

—

If you hate Lucy or Hawk, please block me I’m begging you bc I can’t stand another person interpret them wrongly like that. For the sake of my mental health, please block me with your every power!

I saw many posts saying they hate this ep and the show now, but here I’m like…. I love every bit of this ep??

I want to squeeze everything in this one post, but that’ll be a lot, a lot a lot. So this one first, I’m gonna showering my love to the locker room discussion scene and the Jamie Keeley scene.

Locker room discussion

This! This is the exact reaction we can get from a bunch of men when they found out about women’s videos being leaked. Some will have dirty thoughts with it (Colin - I know he’ll never do it, but in generally speaking, yes, men does that); some will feel once those photos/videos been sent to them, meaning that they belong to them so they don’t have to delete at all; some lay blame on women for recording/taking those content; others feel completely fine with it, the ones to condemn are those leaking; some just let their exes delete those themselves. We are not colours, we are not white or grey or black, we are just flawed human. And flawed human makes mistakes. No one is completetly “white” nor “black”, and this show has demonstrated it quite clearly and has not tried to conceal it from the beginning. We have shitty thoughts, we do shitty stuffs all the time. So I don’t think any characters got ooc-ed in this scene.

I know it is not morally right for anyone to use others’ private stuffs for entertainment without their permission, whether it’s for a joke or not. Colin said shitty thing. He straightforwardly stated that he did not want to delete it, though he has a point saying others leaking are to blame. But in the end, it’s scary to think someone still has your private stuffs in their possesion. Colin did shitty thing too.

But you know. People can change for the better, and that’s why we’re watching Ted Lasso. Isaac, Jamie, Sam they all have a right reaction to this kind of situation, so they were helping their friends think right and do right too. Everybody, sad or not (Richard baby I’m proud of you), willingly deleted their exes stuffs off their phones. In the end of the day, that’s what important. Even Colin, the one who openly opposed to that idea, also found a small place for himself to deal with it.

Some said Isaac honoured people’s privacy, only seconds later he snapped Colin’s phone himself. Isaac was pretty clear with Colin’s reactions, Colin even didn’t stay with the whole team for the mass deletion, he just walked away without specifying any reasons. Also, he said fuck off to him with pretty serious expression, why so agressive man, Isaac might think. Isaac had to do what he thought was right at the moment: took away Colin’s phone and deleted everything himself.

I’m gonna detour a little bit right here. The whole scene got on my nerves. I screamed out loud, and my head could not stop spinning for the next 10 minutes. Omfg would you look at Colin’s face right there. First it was horrified, then it was distressed, later was worried, anxious and finally was defeated. Colin would never want Isaac to find out this way. He tried his fucking life to conceal and played it cool under this supreme toxic football environment, he was not ready for this kind of confrontation, especially from his bestest friend. Isaac used to have homophobic comments, what if he felt the same towards Colin? That fierceful side-eye, that shocked impression, killed pretty much Colin from the inside. But luckily, Isaac’s face neutrolised, he nodded in empathy, he knew what was Colin going through just now. Still, this new information was too much to handle at the moment. He did need some time for himself, for Colin as well. For the next episode, I still think Isaac would going through his acceptance phase, he thought he knew Colin but it turns out he knew nothing. By the end of Ep 9, he would realise how much Colin had to suffer all these years, and he would fucking murder anyone who dares to disrespect Colin and he would cherish his friend even more. I’m not that worried about the situation between Colin and Isaac, what terrifies me is “Roy is asked to so a press conference”. What…? Would it be about Colin??? If it would, I’m going die and and cry endlessly from my grave.

OK back from my detour. I literally finished the whole episode first, after that I replayed this locker room scene, and it makes me love Phil’s acting even more. Jamie first reaction towards the leaking thing was pretty unbothered. Don’t get me wrong, he was still awared of how bad the situation was, it’s just it was not his fault so he did not feel guilty. When Sam mentioned Keeley also got involved, Jamie froze right at the moment. He startled as fuck and was spaced out for a bit. He kept rubbing his bum bag and reconnecting all those dots in his head. Was the source from him? Was he the reason Keeley got all the criticsm? He did not know for sure, but he did not feel good about this either.

And that led to…

The Jamie and Keeley hug

This damn hug sums up very well their relationship. The last time we saw Jamie and Keeley interacted (I think) was at Rebecca’s dad funeral. He pretty fucked up at that point, tho actually I understand his motive, he just wanted to let things out without holding in anymore. He didn’t have a chance to really talk about his feelings for Keeley with Keeley. OK I love you, but I respect your relationship with your current boyfriend, and now I have the gut to say it, I’m happy to move on. He coming to Keeley’s to say sorry is the most Jamie thing ever. He’s now accountable, responsible and care so much for others. Maybe nobody will ever know, and nobody will ever blame Jamie, but he himself will. Him saying It’s my fault broke me into pieces, like TWICE in a span of one episode. He needs Keeley to know he worried about her and he felt guilty, he should have done better so none of these would have happened. Idk guys… I love him sm I might cry.

After a rough evening with Jack - the girlfriend who should have understood better, Keeley was tired. Everybody said sorry, but they disappointed her more after that. Jamie came with another sorry, and she might have predicted what was going to happen next. But she would never anticipated a sincere apology from him. A little bit clumsy, a little bit bum bum from her ex, her friend. She went on for a hug and my heart melted. Might be my favourite part of the episode with so much understanding, so much loving and heartwarming affection from both of them.

We might never see them together as a couple anymore (otherwise I would hate their ending very much), but more of a understanding and trusting friendship. Keeley already moved on, and Jamie also moved on would be the best for them ig.

And that, folks, is the end of my first wheezing part. The second part about Rebecca/Keeley, Rebecca/Ted, Ted/Michelle/Dr. Jacob, Ted/Henry/Beard, Nate/Rupert, Roy/Keeley and Jack/Keeley will be posted later cuz I need more time lol. I love this show sm (and I will keep repeating this on and on), they deserve everything.

Buh-bye!

I love Colin, I love Ted Lasso writers a very not so normal amount let me tell ya.

This gonna be a stupid rant please bear with me.

As a football fan (Chelsea darling you need to get your shit together asap), I know damn well how this toxic and homophobic this community can be. There is a famous Spanish goalkeeper who once stated on the bird app that he was gay (tho he’s happily married to a woman), and one of his teammates was just… played along with that ig? At first, I thought he was so brave to say that publicly, I might have well defended him on every online post laughing at him and his “sexuality” (yes, all of those comments were horrible— and yes, I’m glad that I did not do that). Only later the gk said his account was hacked. They were just making fun of coming out in football without realising how much hurt they had caused to the queer community. And I never felt disgusted towards them ever like that before. And no one, not a single soul felt bad for the ones’d been hurt. They just laughed it off and everything went on like usual.

Unlike in women’s league, we hardly see any out men players in major leagues (5 ones: England, France, Spain, Italia, Germany). Even if we know someone, he was no longer playing, at all. That’s just the world we’re living in. Though I must acknowledge the effort they’re putting on during every specific occasion in a year.

Back to Colin. I was so touched and emotional when hearing him sharing his deep down thoughts.

“I don’t want to be a spokeperson. I don’t want a bunch of apologies.”

Colin does not need to stand out. He does not want to stand in the spotlight and talk about his sexuality, to be an influencer of something like that. He just wants his life to be exact the way it is, and it is not about feeling ashamed or something. I have a strong feeling that he will not come out to the world. Colin just has a little secret to himself (and to his himbos family only). And I believe he’s happy with it.

That being said, Colin does not want to put any pressure on his teammates when they find out he’s gay. He knows they love him for whoever he is, and they might feel guilty because of those previous disrespect comments, but Colin does not blame them. As long as they care for him (of course!), then Colin feels no need to hear any apologises.

“All I want, is for when we win a match, to be able to kiss my fella the same way the boys kiss their girls”

My heart just dropped dead onto the floor. Oh how many times have Colin witnessed other players got to kiss their lovers and wished he could be like them. He saw Jamie, Sam, and then Roy have lovely moments with their love interests, with everyone else cheering and supporting. Hope to see his ahead journey when at least now someone knows and understands his feeling. For the first time, he actually feels “seen”.

Trent and Colin conversation will forever be engraved in my brain. Such a healthy and heart-warming moment between them. It’s safe to say Sunflowers is my favourite episode from Ted Lasso, I laughed and I squeaked and I teared up and I died at every shot. This episode is a fucking masterpiece!!

P/S: I let out a sigh of relief when they haven’t killed off Michael yet. Colin deserves every bit of happiness and love please don’t take Michael away from him I’m begging youuuu

I don’t want to burst everyones bubbles but afc richmond is not gonna win the epl, even in the wildest dream, at least in this season tho. They just got back to the league, and Jan Maas is right, “most teams who get promoted are relegated the very next year”

This is known as “yo-yoing” when theyre bouncing back and forth between the epl and championship. We always joke around that there should be a league in between for those clubs who aren’t enough (good players, finance, tactics, etc.) to be in the epl, but are wayyy better than clubs in the championship.

I love the greyhound himbos but they’re not gonna win the trophy. My speculation is that they will fight for one position in the top 6 (or top 8) to be qualified for the european’s league. And honestly, this counts as a huge success for them anyway, compared to all the articles stating they would come last this season

I’ve just rewatched 4x14 (the one that Owen got Paul investigated his girlfriend’s husband’s death) and I still find it ridiculously hilarious smh.

Yeah I know this is just a drama show and they just can’t make everything real as it is. But this?? Gosh they make me question APD protocol on a person’s death scene. I maybe watch too much true crime documentary but clearly it’s so damn absurd.

If the Texas Rangers already suspected this was a homicide, then I suppose they had to block the whole house for investigation and examine the whole scene? Also this is the 2nd time they should do forensics but somehow they didn’t. They just come to the scene, drag the person out of it and leave without any further actions.

It’s reallyyyyy annoying to see some unprofessionals go around the crime scene and do the digging. That’s just make the whole police/detective departments look bad cuz they aren’t doing their jobs let alone doing it right. Not to mention why’d Gabriel be assigned to the case involving Owen when it was clearly a conflict of interests.

I still think Gabriel’s rage on Owen’s acts is entirely correct. Under no circumstances should Owen overstep his right like that. He’s just a firefighter captain, not a police and sure not has any power in this situation. Although the Reyes-Strand bonding at the end was really adorable and I have to replay it like 10 times, this is still a bad written episode.

I’ve been saying this for 3 or 4 weeks now, but I love this week’s episode so much?????? Every moment is just 😙👌🏻

Roy is slowly working on his anger issue, and once he get a grip on himself, he’d definitely have a proper conversation with Keeley about their relationship. I can feel it guys, it’s getting near. Anyone notices when he did the king kong thing banging on his chest? Bc it was so damn cute I can’t take it aaaaaa

And of course!! The centric storyline of 3x09, Isaac and Colin woohooooooo. As I said in the post last week, Isaac was going through his acceptance phase, and it’s not gonna be easy for him and Colin. No he is not homophobic, and I don’t understand why some would think Isaac is gonna out Colin. He was angry and frustrated, Colin lied to him for years, he just could not believe it. But even when he could not control his own outrageousness, even when he dared to beat the shit out of that man, even when he felt he was not trustworthy enough for his best friend’s secret, he would never betray Colin like that.

Yeah sometimes I wish somebody, anybody could headbutt those homophobes, racists like what Isaac did on the field. I’m 100% with him on this. Those bastards fucking derserve it. Also, I like the fact that Roy is always kind of a mentor to Isaac, a formal captain to the current captain. Roy calmly guided Isaac through his chaotic state of mind, and it always works like a wonder.

Colin’s not coming out to the entire world but just his teammates and coaches is something so personal to me. As long as there are people truly care about him and his feelings, he doesn’t have to seek any recognition from the rest of the world. I hope we can see him introducing Michael as his boyfriend (and kissing him) in upcoming episodes. Maybe Michael will appear in the locker room after Richmond got an important win of the season?

Yeah and the bros talk at the ending, I laughed out loud like an idiot bc it was so beautiful… Straight dude bonding with gay dude during a FIFA game???? It was hilarious af, and I think I got flashback to when me and my bi friend educating other straight friends about gay terms lolll. Actually I’m straight too but I have consumed too much gay content, too much I think I have an army of devils behind my back.

Oi we have now confirmed Sam is the first vice captain, I wonder who the second one is then. Jamie maybe? That’d explain their dorky interaction across the locker room. It’s so heartwarming when I realise they used to hate each other guts, and now they’re just happily joking around all the time.

This post is kind of a mess, and I regret nothing!

Okay I might get attacked by this but let the people hate characters they hate. You like them, fine, good for you, moving on! Yes I’m talking about Nate here. I get what he has been thru but simply I cant forgive him now. It doesnt mean I’m not hoping for his redemption arc later, he deserves it, and others also deserve his apology too.

Here are some things Nate did that piss me off:

1. Treating Ted like shit

Too obvious, the man didnt have a chance to defend himself. Yeah yeah some will say Nate didnt mean it and he really wanted to say hi and apologise to Ted. But did he? Did he actually feel sorry for slipping that information to Trent? No! Never once crossed his mind (until s03e05). I can understand why he did the roasting at the press before match with Rupert’s watching, I just hope he feel a bit tiny guilt after it.

2. Treating Colin like shit

I know, Colin used to bully Nate, now he’s getting his revenge and bc he could not physically bully Colin, he turned to verbal abuse. The motive is there. Make sense. But what about Isaac? What about Jamie, the root of all the bullies? Or Nate just chose the “easy one” to pick on? Isaac is the captain, the quarrel between the coach and the captain will likely set the team on fire. Jamie is a star striker, there’s no good touching the team ace. But not in the case of the small midfielder right? Colin would never talk back, Nate knew that and he just kept making Colin feel bad about himself. I have a feeling Colin’s mantra “I’m not a piece of shit” somehow related to Nate’s talking shit to him.

3. Treating Will like shit

Bc the boy took his job, bc the boy did way better than him ig? Idk, never knew why Nate had to be harsh on Will like that. Maybe just like Colin, Nate chose his victims.

Once again I feel the urge to emphasise this: I HOPE NATE GOT HIS REDEMPTION ARC LATER. Just right at this damn moment, I feel nothing for him. Let me hate him people!