in request to someone to put this anonymously out of respect:

I have a confession to make. I'm a hater...or atleast I THOUGHT i was. I did not particularly cared about your blog Until tonight where I was scrolling through Ao3 and saw one of your bed time story fics. I decided to say "fuck it" and read one of your fics. I then went to read the origin comics, thinking it would be a hate read...but...I was laughing. Smiling. And giggling over how cute it was. My favorite parts of the comic was your author notes, being really proud of your small accomplishments in bettering your art. It made me, a fellow artist, proud.

I was once a hater but now fell in love with Mary and your AU. My problem was that I couldn't sleep tonight. I think because I feel like the grinch who's heart melted away and I just can't get this off my mind. So I typed this all up and drew some fanart cuz we have the same comfort character I think.

So uh. Sorry I misjudged your AU and OC. It reminded me of a children's show I use to watch and I liked seeing your progression with your art skill. sorry that this was so long. It's 3am and I literally can't sleep until I get this off my chest

Anyway here's a little something something as a apology. Idk how cottonball would've gotten damage. I'm thinking maybe freak dog/bully encounter on the way home from school

Uh anyway thanks and sorry again

hey! there’s nothing wrong about not liking something at first! sure my comics at first aren’t the best (After all, I was 16 when I started to write this story and i’m almost 24! the reason why my digital art looked like absolute shit was because my mom thought digital art was “fake art” and i was still learning how to master digital art with a newly-acquired tablet at the time) but I am so so glad that even with the flaws of my earlier stuff, it still manages to bring a smile to your face!

about the children’s show stuff...i did take a lot of inspiration from shows like that! some i can name off the top of my head were Heidi (the pre-ghibli adaptation), Bear in the Big Blue House, Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood (my beloved) and now most recently, Bluey!! I think it definitely has in part from the fact my childhood was a mess and wanted to create something that fosters wholesome vibes to heal and reclaim my childhood, especially from the fact i’m the only autistic person in my family :’)

but hey! at least though you were honest! i’ve had to deal with people in the fandom who said I was either “sanitizing” hetalia as a whole just because it was wholesome or a well-known artist (name redacted) who was vagueing about me in a gc when i was at work saying that they hated ocs like Mary because they were self-insert mary sues. but otherwise, i forgive you plain and simple :D

i apologize if this was definitely a tangent but this made me really happy! i probably think petunia (rich girl asshole bully in school) snipped cottonball’s leggy and germany saw that mary was in distress since cottonball is a comfort item for her since she had him since she was a lil baby, and he is a good dad who will fix him up!

Day 10

So i talked to my therapist and another Vietnamese person at the cultural meet up a couple days ago about the abortion horror movie-- they havn't seen it, but it sounds like its less about the topic of abortion and more about the Vietnamese culture and different religious view points around death, killing things, and karma. interesting ! anyway, I cried in therapy and then bought myself some yanyans and soju on the walk home. so fun to get a lil treat! like i felt good when i left, did some good thought exercises, or visualization therapy, whatever you wanna call it, but as i walked through the privately owned waterfront development that I had watched the sunset in the night before, back across the bridge to my side of the canal I was rly like 'holy shit fuck this world.' In NY i work in the building associated with Domino Park in Williamsburg, part of my salary is funded directly by the developers. This is a job I wouldn't be able to have in my own neighborhood, because if i was taking payment from the developers causing displacement in my own neighborhood, i think a lot of the people i advocate and organize with would stop fucking with me or taking me seriously. I feel pretty bad about it, like why is it okay I work a job in Williamsburg, where i dont live, that I would never work in my hometown of Flushing? That is to say that making me go to therapy in the private waterfront mega development is like a cruel joke. like, the first thing i clocked when I came here was these six huge towers on the other side of the canal, and now u send me to cry about my feelings there?? maybe i'm a little too sensitive to the impacts of luxury waterfront development, because as you may be able to tell, advocacy around displacement and waterfront development actually consumes all my free time. also btw, the therapist confirmed the waterfront access is privately owned, as I assumed. Every time i cross over the canal it takes all my energy to not climb down this ladder under the bridge. I need to keep reminding myself i am a stranger in a strange land and should probs not trespass. but if i were in my own neighborhood, i wouldn't think twice.

the motorbike food tour tonight was fun. in my art practice i give a lot of tours, but always forget i'm a tour guide, until i tell someone about what I do and they're like "so you're a tour guide?" Me and my student tour guide vibed about the pains of touring people around. it was a fun experience, and funny to see how him and his other tour guide co-workers kinda just circle around each other with diff tourists throughout the evening-- all the tours start at the same time and go to the same places. he said they go to the same places every night, he's been eating the same food with tourist 3-4 times a week every week for 3 months since hes had this job. if i were a local i would probably find this method of touring incredibly annoying. He took me to the Thích Quảng Đức statue commemorating the monk that burned alive in the street advocating for religious freedom. He noted that the photos of the event that were distributed globally in the 1960's edit out the gas canister because it makes it look more profound and like he acted alone. You can see the bad 1960's photoshop blur in the left side of the image under the car tier. super interesting note on propaganda. Im glad I didn't come here without a guide, i would not have known that. I asked if this act of protest was effective, and if it worked to get what the Buddhist community wanted-- he said it got global eyes on the issue due to the distribution of the images. I mentioned to him that an american guy burned himself alive on the supreme court steps because of climate change last year, he was very surprised that there was basically no media coverage of that and he had not heard about it.

The tour groups kept circling around one another when we arrived at a public housing complex. we were basically walking through the projects taking photos, like honestly not a nice thing to be making a spectacle out of the people living in public housing projects. all these tour groups climbed 2-3 flights of stairs and walk around these peoples front doors, it happens every night. super obnoxious tbh. perhaps regrettably, I couldn't help but snap some pics, the lanterns were still up from the tet holiday, and the lighting was just right. These types of developments are what the book im reading is about, titled "building socialism: the afterlife of east german architecture in urban vietnam". I shared a photo of the cover before, these buildings look almost identical.

He pointed out the water tower and then we left.

Your article about Cameron was so beautifully written. Cameron has always been so dear and close to my heart, since middle school Ive connected with him. I dont think I've ever seen anyone think so deeply about this character, i honestly felt validated reading your article. your analysis was so, so spot on, so well articulated and thought out, i can feel the love you have for this character and it makes me happy to know he had a profound effect on someone else out there. I just thought it was really lovely and I wanted to let you know. And also if you ever do write that thesis about him....I'd love to read that. Thank you! 💜

Thank you so much for your kind words!!! 😭😭😭 i had so much fun writing it and cameron’s character resonated so deeply with me for multiple reasons. honestly theres so much to say about his character with regards to mental health, gender, disability, relationships, etc… another big observation of his character for me is how he really represents how wealth can be so isolating and lead to individualism (among other things) and how ferris and sloane introduce him to community and culture that is obviously more impactful to him than wealth. i mean, i wouldn’t call ferris or sloane’s families working class lol, but cameron’s family clearly comes from more wealth than either of them (which has given him a house outside of the suburbs and on private acreage with a sleek, trendy contemporary look, his dads affinity for luxury cars, etc). omg sorry i kind of went on a tangent here but i just thought it was so interesting cuz a lot of people tout ferris bueller as a totally innocent and pretty wholesome movie which it is, but ive also had a lot of people come up to me and talk about how they never really thought too deeply about the scene in the museum or understood its significance (which can be imo interpreted in tons of ways! but it struck me as Incredibly Trans at first which sparked the article lol) but its fun to really look beneath the surface on movies like this for me and interpret them further and im glad other people like to as well!! :))