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brightlilies-a · 4 years

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sometimes i make posts like months after i say i’ll make them and that’s okay. . .

re: flowers in their gardens.

or meta regarding the repeating motif that is flowers in albi’s development as a character up until the end of 5.0, so shadowbringers spoilers will be mentioned, for a more-on-the-nose title.

before he was ever a warrior of light or blessed with the echo, albi’to was a keeper of the moon raised in the traditional way in the black shroud. his people were disliked and persecuted by gridanians that believed their hunting practices were little more than poaching and would upset the elementals that dwell within and protect the forest from outsiders that wish to plunder its resources. his tribe, however, being very small in number, often complied with gridanian law out of necessity to survive, which meant nature was something albi always regarded as sacred and to be respected. but even as a small boy, he would sneak out and about, find himself in clearings with single flowers growing beneath the dense boughs that would otherwise block out the sun, and he couldn’t help himself.

he’d pick them and take them back to camp as his little treasures, somehow convincing himself that the spirits of the forest wouldn’t notice if he was stealthy enough. & the first one he ever took was a pink brightlily, the flower that would later be constantly tucked into his hair. a little memory, a little reminder: that life flourishes in unexpected places, that softness is not weakness.

throughout arr and hw, that was the extent of it. he wore pink brightlilies in his hair in spite of being a paladin who was supposed to stand steady on the front lines. he’d get distracted, wander off the beaten path to smell the flowers regardless of the situation’s demands of his time. sometimes, maybe, he’d give flowers out to raise spirits or earn smiles where people were convinced to find rage or sadness, but the heavy armor never complimented flowers. he was constantly replacing the ones in his hair because they’d lose their petals, burn, get crushed, what-have-you incidents that come with fighting primals and the like.

into sb when he swaps to samurai after getting beat down by zenos (that’s another post, but there’s symbolism galore there, too), he finally gets to express himself a bit better now that he’s not being weighed down with the clank, clank, clank of armor. he can wear lighter clothes with floral embroidery, and even his attacks leave the afterimages of petals in the wind. his weapon blends with the nature he holds to be holy, and even after he pushes zenos back (with the weapon zenos beat him down with, even), when he looks around himself at the royal menagerie...

there’s a sea of red and white flowers. red and white like himself, gently waving in the breeze.

patch 4.5 is, of course, where everything really changes — even here. the last time albi wears flowers in his hair is in the ghimlyt dark, as they burn up inside the battlefield. it’s hard for him to build up his usual spirit while he feels helpless from watching his friends, the people he considers family after losing his real one, fall into comas without a solution in sight, but that’s when life pushes another guide in front of him, ushering him onto the path that he was always meant to walk (ya know, dancer), with some very familiar words.

flowers are his treasures, his inspiration for their gentle resilience. and at this time where he’s so lost, not only does he find himself watching a show of a passion he’s held since he was a child (other post, lol, ‘cause you see how long this one is), but she’s using words that seem so cherry-picked to address him and only him at this specific time. he’s the bud struggling to find its way to the sun in the bleakness of the situation, and he has to survive this somehow.

which gets mirrored, funnily enough, once he’s in norvrandt via yet another handy mirror: feo ul. of course, i can’t go into terrible depth in this post regarding how much albi relates to the pixies of il mheg, from how they live their lives, to how they’re feared by outsiders, to their love of whimsy and fun, as they are beings born of the souls of children, partially because i already have, but know it’s there. from the get-go, however, feo ul addresses the warrior of light as such:

yes, more nature. as a sapling, as a young tree that still has room to grow.

and grow he does. after all, he starts 5.0 with the blind hope of optimism carrying him, believing that he has to maintain the appearance of strength and hope that everybody believes him to be no matter the toll on himself, always carrying the burden of saving everyone and, while aware that he needs to rely on others more, finding it harder and harder to actually do that and break old habits. he is actually tempted to take the offer of being the next titania, because il mheg is everything he’s ever wished for in a home, but he turns it down as the people he loves and cares for so much still need him. he loses bits of his innocence as he’s forced to grow up, confront the possibility of his own death, and he smiles just a bit less. instead of running headlong into danger without a second thought, he considers things, and he learns to care about himself, too.

and near the end of 5.0, his growth, subtle as it may be, is recognized, since feo ul finally calls him something else.

the one word that means so very, very much to him: flower. one that’s bloomed and is coveted.

of course, fast forward to the current patch and... while he still hasn’t put a flower back in his hair in some time (it hasn’t stopped others from placing them, though, and y’all know who you are.), it’s quite a common sight to see him with bushels of brightlilies or tending to little gardens. he’s been incorporating glamours of flowers into his dances instead, mostly to make it look like they sprout where he steps, or well, look at crimson lotus, but he’s so much more free now than he was before.

he’s a dancing flower in the huge, huge garden that is the universe. (◡‿◡✿) thank u for coming to my tedtalk abt how i sometimes cry cuz i know the textboxes aren’t written explicitly for me and alb but sometimes they just hit me like they are

#🏶: bloom in the dark. ( headcanon. )#[ is it really me if i dont write essays about meta points that dont need this much info #i forget how long ago i promised to write this really i just remember i came across the caps of the textboxes recently and was like #oh yeah that was a post. SO HERE WE ARE #knee deep in me. crying bc alb is such a good boy. so round. much friend shape. ]

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