#it was clead to me she didn't want to know because she would believe me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ineffectualdemon · 1 year

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That time my grandma who when I was heavily depressed teenager took me aside and recommended crying in the shower so no one could use my tears against me "but you still get to cry"

I loved my grandma very much and she was very good to me and whether or not this advice was good long term I do recognise it's one person who was abused by their mother giving survival tips to someone else who was being abused

Whether or not she recognised thats what she was doing, that is what she was doing and I appreciate the emotion and intention behind it

#before she died when talking tl me about how i didnt talk to my mom anymore she said two important things #1 that she understood that my mom could be mean which is why she didnt want the details of what my mom had done #2 'when your mom dies you will find it difficult'#not hard #not 'you'll regret it'#just 'it will be difficult' and it probably will be #and i dont begrude my grandma not wanting details of how her daughter abused her grandkids #but she never ever ever put pressure on me to fix thar relationship #it was clead to me she didn't want to know because she would believe me #and she wanted to love her daughter #and i wasnt gonna take that from her #mental health #childhood trauma

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