#issues & problems disorder i would not make that claim lightly trust me) and like. idk what to do with it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dreamertrilogys · 2 years

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i need it to be next semester so bad because every day i spend the next 3 hours after english class recovering from the psychological damage i experienced (being flirted with & flirting BACK). except the thing is i actually have a class with her next semester too and not only that but my other friend who i’m in love with is also in that class. explodes & dies i suppose

#it’s genuinely so bad. i think i might #nvm i’m not typing that out. *** *** ****** * *********** ** ** ****** ** ********* ** *** *** ****#anyway #the worst part is it started as a JOKE because of the goddamn MEMOIR except when you jokingly flirt with someone for 2 months straight at #some point it becomes not a joke. and i think she might actually genuinely be into me which is INSANE (and like. as someone with severe #issues & problems disorder i would not make that claim lightly trust me) and like. idk what to do with it #.txt #fake ex gf #crushposting #<- the way these tags are about two different people. insane life i’m living rn #see at first it was like oh she’d date me just for fun which is fine bc i’d ALSO do that maybe yknow. but she might actually like me. and i #might possibly like HER. BUT LIKE. i really am truly in love with my other friend. like if he asked me out (which would not happen) i’d say #yes immediately. but if dani (fake ex gf/girl from english class) asked me out. WELL THAT’S HAPPENED BEFORE TECHNICALLY. well i’d uhhh.#flirt back and then we’d make plans to skip class to go out somewhere together next week while her leg was purposefully pressed against mine #ah fuck #BUT there’d be no clarity on whether it was a date or not. she’d just ask me to go somewhere in a really homoerotic way and i’d be like in #what way do you mean that and she’d be like oh? what way do you want want me to mean it and i’d shrug and we’d go on back and forth like #that for a bit without coming to a conclusion. and then we’d just go on with our lives and such #but like the thing is. if it came down to my friend/crush vs her. i’d choose my friend #AND IT’S HAPPENED BEFORE #like not directly but once i essentially had the choice of leaving school 5 mins early and walking home w/ her #OR leaving school 5 mins late and walking home with him. and i chose to walk home with him like it wasn’t even a contest #gf

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