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#im still not brave enough in my mid thirties
steelycunt · 1 year
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ummm ridi, i've got a fucking bone to pick with you. i was procrastinating writing my final paper and started rereading "playing on, insane" and I just wanted to ask why you would ever do that to me. your r/s is the most accurate, in my opinion, and now everything hurts. i also read" standing, by the wall" but only the first part bc I can only put myself through so much, and omg. that sirius is so sweet and lovely and I want to hug him. I was wondering how you think everything unfolded in poi the morning after, if you have even thought about it. even though it made me rlly sad, it was very very lovely and your writing leaves me in awe every time, much love muah xx
hello!! thank u so much (n im so sorry!!) i'm glad you enjoyed them!! i always wince thinking about my older stuff because its. usually quite different to how i write now (inevitably) n i (like to) think ive developed in my writing since then but. it is lovely to hear that people still enjoy them n get something out of them :^) rest of this im going to tuck under the cut here xx
poi in particular is a strange one because i think i wrote that in like. one afternoon? a day and a half? i remember very little about putting that together frankly but considering it usually takes me like. a month and a half minimum to finish something that one is a big outlier for me (which. may or may not reflect in the quality sfhdsh) both because of that and because its llal!! which is not generally my thing!!
as for the aftermath of it. as nice as it would b to say i think they get back 2gether immediately afterwards...i think mainly the morning after is a bit of an awkward one. s would regret doing it and try to gloss over it by being a bit of an aloof cunt again and r would have. more immediate aches and pains and troubles to contend with so i think it would probably be a day or two before they can even talk about it and once they do. it would still probably be a pretty stilted conversation because well. god theyre just such bitter wearied old men by then (<- says old men as if they are not. mid thirties. well they'd had a lot taken out of them). but the upshot of that conversation would be the tentative establishment of there still being feelings there (of course there are). after that i think before they can get there they have to relearn being comfortable around each other? which is a slow process over many days of just. spending time in each others company + taking their meals together + understanding the bits that have changed between them and the bits that have stayed the same. i do think eventually they will get there though xx on a warm evening after they have had dinner and they are sitting together and they are brave enough to be fifteen again xx
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delicrieux · 3 years
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—MAKE YOU SAY “OH” EXTRAS: TINDER
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extra meaning non-canonical occurrence; can be placed anywhere in the “make you say oh” timeline after couple (cha. 14) and before the final “oh”. 
pairing—corpse husband x f!reader warnings—tinder profiles, tw: men, swearing.  word count—2.6k. format— written. ─── ❥ req by nonnie​:  y/n makes a youtube vid/live stream where she's just swiping through her tinder acc and corpse literally blocks her lmao
author’s note—akldsljfs this was such a funny idea i could not not write it lmao
ultimate masterlist. myso masterlist
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You have pulled the biggest brain move by setting up both a facecam and a screen recorder on your phone. All is beautifully displayed and visible during the stream. Your fanbase is particularly intrigued on what exactly are you planning on doing today, seeing as your tweet of “strea” had been a bit vague, if not downright ominous. No emojis. No elaboration. You couldn’t even be bothered to finish the word. Truly, a mystery. Everyone tuned in and are currently waiting with bated breath.
A few of your fans must sense upcoming doom because the overall mood in the chat turns from optimistically intrigued to...evil. It’s an entity all on it’s own now, clawing at you through the screen with various renditions of laughter and devil emojis. A few eggplants thrown in there for good measure, accompanied, naturally, by the scandalous water drops. At first the common consensus is that you’re biting the bullet and going through your camera roll on stream. Definitely an idea worth considering, though you frankly don’t know what lies at the start of the 11k photograph journey, and you are afraid to check in public. Could be a harmless meme, could be a salacious pic you had saved of an OF star. It’s really a gamble. Either way, you would definitely get banned. You might still get banned. Why do you insist on doing shit like this?
Because it’s funny. Because you’re kinda stupid. Because it’s just so absolutely laughably easy to do.
A smile quirks your lips, and while it is not explicitly smug, the look in your eyes sure is, “Greetings,” You utter lowly, dimming the lights--the budget for this stream! Ugh, you went all out, “my children.”
mother i crave violence
sensing evil energy rn!!
i do not claim the energy in this video for myself or anyone else watching this 💖💖
^with peace and love shut the fuck up
“I know y’all lowkey hoes-” Upon your words the chat splits into two: one side eagerly agrees (even shares a few OF accounts! How helpful, supporting small businesses!), whilst the other feverishly insists on innocence. You make a face stuck somewhere between offended and bewildered, “Now c'mon now-I know you. I know you all. We’re the same, don’t-what was that?”
You try to scroll back to the comment but it’s loss in the sea of incoming messages, “I swear to God I just saw-”
Corpse_Husband: i love late night streams it’s not like i have anything better to do.
“COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPSE!!!!” 
rip headphone users
i cant feel my face when im with you by the weeknd but instead of face its my fucking ears
yall think full vol on pc is better?my parents woke up 😭😭😭😭
To think he’s spending his last waking moments for today with watching you (he probably still would have anyway, because you do not posses an ounce of shame or self-control and pester him relentlessly)! It makes your heart sing, and suddenly, a traitorous, fun hating idea barges it’s way through the crowd of incoherent buzzing and states: don’t do this. For some reason it also has the voice of Rae. As if that would work in guilt-tripping you- Rae never succeed, and her fictitious rendition in mind won’t fare much better either.
Still, you thought about it. That must count for something. Corpse will understand, won’t he? Why don’t you want to upset it in the first place? Men look so funny when they lose their shit, like hello, don’t you have anything better to do? But the image of Corpse just sitting there, hurt, distraught, leaving you on seen because he’s in his sad boy hours leaves a sour taste in your mouth. 
queen rly went from  🥺😊 to 😕 u ok bbgirl?
Corpse_Husband: no pouts cutie
akjdjoeijdfse cUTIE??? deadass boutta r.i.p.
Well that succeeded in eliminating everything from mind, doubts included. If this was an anime, the scenery would shift into something roseate, with flowers and bubbles and sparkles all around you along with a halo or two. Alas, not an anime, rather reality. The led-lights, however, seemingly possessing a will of their own, slowly turn from deep violet to pink. You smile brightly, like the absolute dumbass you are, and you are met with a ray of heart and blushing emojis. You are just so cute, a real cutie! Still in your disguise adorable state, you swipe your finger on your phone screen, the grin never leaving your lips.
There, among the plethora of apps, nestled sits a red square with a white fire plastered on it. The delicate calligraphy on the bottom reads: TINDER.
The mood changes once again- you’re giving the roaches emotional instability by how quickly everything flips over- and the chat spams eggplants vigorously; some, of course, bravely fight against the thirst.
nooooooo i thought y/n is gonna stream in a god honoring way!!!
^pack it up girl defined
“So, Charlie and I-” You note a few awfully curious comments and squint, “-yes, we talk a lot. Charlie is a really good friend of mine. We’re best friends. Brothers. Sisters. Cousins. The whole fucking family tree-no, that sounds weird. Delete. Anyway, Charlie, being the absolute fucker he is, said, hey, you know what would be funny? And I was like, nooo, what would be funny, Charlie? And he says to me, he says, says, making fun of men on Tinder. And if y’all need any more proof that Charlie and I are platonic soulmates, then dunno, my children, my roaches, I dunno-I dunno what more to give you.”
You can’t be bothered reading the comments, there’s too damn many. You also need to save your reading comprehension for the actual bios. It has a time limit, that darn thing. 
“Okay, so I made a profile earlier, but I hadn’t swiped on anyone yet-” Despite the fact, Tinder helpfully informs you that already 99+ people have swiped right on you, “So, this is me,” You show the pictures you have of yourself, and damn, not to be a conceited narcissist, but you look really good. Like if you saw yourself on Tinder, you’d super like instantly. “Uhm, so, my bio-my bio says: let’s sauce in the tub together, ya dig? splishy splashy, giggle giggle.” 
i cant believe we are witnessing y/n trying to form a coherent sentence live 
shes trying give her time
ya dig??? y not capeesh
what scene from the godfather is this lol?
“My anthem, is,” You laugh, covering your lips with your hand, “Corpsie, this is form you-” Proudly, you show that indeed, Corpse’s E-GIRLS ARE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE is listed as your anthem on Spotify, “Hehe.” Yes, you say that aloud.
Corpse_Husband: you’re killing me Corpse_Husband: thanks baby Corpse_Husband: now delete tinder ❤︎
You ignore his last quip, deciding it’s finally time to get this show on the road, “Right, let’s do this shit. I’m not actually going to swipe on any guys that look, uh, decent? Yuck, can’t believe I just said that, uhm, because I-because I feel like some actually deserve a chance with someone? I don’t wanna get anyone’s hopes up, as I am currently in a long distance relationship with Chrollo. So I’m just gonna swipe on, like, frat boy assholes. Because I don’t care if I hurt their feelings. Quite frankly I don’t think they possess them in the first place.”
The chat voices their agreements. With the ground rules set, you, giddy, click on the first profile.
Does Tinder know what you’re doing, your plan? The FBI agent watching you through your phone must be working overtime, bless his heart. They must, because the the first guy to meet you is named Jason, and there he is, blond hair and blue eyes, holding up a fish the size of his torso. Marginally adequate in looks, pretty good muscles. A solid 7 bordering on 8. He’s the same age as you, 15 miles away, and he studies at some college you don’t care enough to look up. Bio reads:
I like to drive fast. Fishing is my passion, but if you can’t catch me by the ocean, you’ll catch me catching waves, bro! Love a good gym date. You do squats, and I’ll keep a close eye to make sure you’re doing it correctly ;) You probably saw me at a party. Leader of the The Phi Kappa Psi. I’m a Gemini, if that matters lol.
You, of course, read it aloud, dramatically; provide some constructive criticism-he seems nice, but he’s a Gemini, so naturally, you can’t trust him at all! Also, that gym date session leaves little to be desired. With your rant done, you swipe right, and shocker! (not), it’s an instant match.
“Okie, I still wanna swipe of some profiles, so I’ll see what he’ll text later-” For a second you wonder the legalities of this stream, but you’re having too much fun to think of it further, “guys, I won't get sued, right?”
NOW she considers it
well....
if you do, we’ll kickstart your lawyer dw <3
Onto the next profile. Kevin, 25, is seen fixing his car- or, you assume he’s mid-fixing it, you don’t really know why else he’d hold a wrench and be covered in oil. He’s shirtless, and the caveman part of your brain echoes something closely resembling AWOOOGA!, but...but!...blonde hair, blue eyes. You pout again, “I don’t...I don’t really like blond boys, ya know? With the blue eyes and all, it’s just not my thing, uhm, unless it’s like-like...Armin from Attack on Titan. Else I don’t care.”
Onto the bio:
You have to treat a car like you treat a woman: go on long rides, take the lead, but most importantly, keep her oiled up 😜 
“What the fuck did I just read?”
The chat is equally confused. You swipe right anyway- another match. Too easy.
The stream continues without incident for a solid thirty minutes- all of your matches, expect a few that genuinely looked like normal dudes that really couldn’t write a decent bio to save their lives, had been blond hair blue eyed gym rats with ranging forms of misogyny. Some opened with asking for nudes out right, some asked about your day first before asking for nudes. You prefer the former. Straight to the point! You admire the gall. 
But then, down the forty-five minute mark a profile popped up that made you still by your phone, your smile dying as your eyes bulged. Dear God. Lord in heaven. Who is this demonspiit lookalike and why is he so fucking hot? The neck tats, the skateboard, the clothes- holy shit, you gotta close your mouth before some drool dribbles out.
No bio, just his name, Tyler, and that he’s 23.
“He boutta be 23 in me.” You mutter, swiping right with lightning speed.
WHAT DID SHE SAYYYYY?????????
tyler is y/ns karma for relentlessly mocking that one guy that had a whole ass list on what his “female” partner should be
^he deserved it and also tyler seems like a typical fuckboi y/n grow a braincell
look at mom 🥺 her eyes are sparkling
It wasn’t a match right away. You somehow expected as much, but it still upset you. Simp behavior, pathetic. The stream continued bravely, and when Tyler messaged you a simple “yo” you totally didn’t sequel. You didn’t manage to text him back on stream: texting all those guys that you didn’t really find all that attractive was easy, but this...You’re a sucker for a man who radiates red flag energy. His whole profile is a red flag. He might just be a red flag himself.
What can you do? Suddenly becoming color blind is not easy. Once the stream ends, you unmatch with everyone expect Tyler. He you chat with for a bit, but a sudden craving for different company makes you abandon him, too. You don’t feel too heartbroken for him- you’re certain there’s already too many girls in his dms. You wish them luck.
Happily, you delete Tinder. You go to Twitter, notice you’re trending again- look at you go! Queen shit- and as you compose a thank you tweet, something strange happens. You go to text Corpse, but when you click on his profile you grow cold.
YOU’RE BLOCKED. You can’t follow or see @/Corpse_Husband ‘s Tweets. 
...Pardon? You hop onto Instragram and-also blocked. Seriously? And you thought you’re one petty bitch. Corpse is seriously prissy about everything. Damn, if he didn’t like your stream, he could’ve just said so. Didn’t need to, like, block you from his internet existence. So not cool.
You try texting him but no text go through. Well how will you let him know you deleted Tinder just like he asked? You relieve your frustrations by punching your pillow a few times. Later, you apologize to her, you didn’t mean to hurt her, it’s not her, it’s you. Fuck, 5 minutes of exile and you’re already loosing your mind.
“Raeeeeeeeeeeee!” You whine loudly. It’s roughly 2am now, but you don’t care. You’re too heartbroken to care. There’s a thump from her room, but nothing else, “Raeeeeeeeee!!!” You wail, wallowing in self-pity on your bed. You hear a very loud, very annoyed sigh from her room, followed by angry marching. Your door is abruptly thrown open, and in the dim, colorful light you see her scowl.
“What?” She grits.
“Can you please tell Corpse to unblock me from everything?”
“What did you do now?”
“I made fun of men on Tinder.”
She pauses, “...That doesn’t sound so bad.” She surmises, voice laced with suspicion, “What else?”
“...There was one really hot guy that I kinda sorta talked to after--”
“Y/n.”
“-But I totally deleted Tinder and honestly he was pretty boring, so, like, uhm, please?”
She sighs, the servery of which implies she is holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and instantly you know that you won. She taps away at her phone, “You owe me one.” She states, and before you can reply, she exits your room and slams the door behind her.
Grinning, you text his phone again. The message goes through, oh gosh, you’re so relieved you feel like crying. This has been, officially, the worst five minutes of your life.
You Y DID U BLOCK ME LOSER!!! MAJOR LOSER ALERT!! I DELETED EVERYTHING IT WAS A JOKE r u still mad at me? y u always mad at me i never do anything:(
my husband You’re my baby, how do you think I’ll react when I see you publicly simping for some asshole on Tinder?
Oh no, he used the words, he delivered the killing blow. You’re finished. Your heart can’t take such a workout. 
Not that you would ever admit it to him, though!
You hehe ur jellyyyy u always dis jealous hehe?
my husband Not jealous.
Yeah, you might not be the brightest tool in the shed, but even you know that’s a lie. You send him an array of kissy emojis that he doesn’t have the decency to reply to. Then, completely unprompted and dead serious, you send him a simple voice memo, saying: “You really have nothing to worry about, you know? You’re my favorite, Corpsie.”
He responds via text, reiterating that he’s not fucking jealous and that he just doesn’t like when you show such outward interest in anyone but it’s not like he cares or anything. It’s just really, like, weeeeird to see his baby simping for another man like that totally ruins the whole dynamic!!! It was only natural that he should block you on every social media platform, including his personal number (which, like, was completely necessary! Doesn’t matter that his viewers can’t see it, it’s gotta be super believable!), and inform his followers of that, because it’s all a joke, like, for the dynamic, that Youtube grind, you know? Ya dig? No personal feelings were involved at all. He totally wasn’t upset that you found someone else cute, no way!
my husband I’m not jealous. Lol.
You ik u repeated tht like 50 times  u trynna convince me or??? lmao
my husband No comment. ...You don’t actually talk to anyone else like we’re talking, right?
You no one else calls me their baby if thts wat ur wondering at least not to my knowledge lol im all urs
my husband That makes me very happy to hear:)
Yeah, it makes you very happy, too.
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hope you liked it!! xx
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Say No To This (Eliza Version/Role-Reverse)
Disclaimers: LONG FANFIC!!!
Theodosia POV
Another warm summer night engulfed the city NYC where I began yawning and realizing it was already past ten o'clock. Deciding to wrap things up by going through one last files one last time before going home. Knowing Aaron would be worry sick that I stay longer at work than I’ve intentionally. Oh well, at least I can have my handsome holding me in his strong arms. Just thinking about me make me blush and giddy all shyly, which I know it’s stupid for a grown woman to be acting like a teenage girl again. Hey, that’s love for you especially being married to the man or women you’ve been for more than a decade. It’s a magical experience when you created the wondrous memories as a married couple. There’s going to be ups and downs and which is part of life and you just have to accept it. Even when you’re in complete denial. Which I could say for a certain I know that writing completely non-stop at the office next door.
You see, my old friend my dearest Elizabeth Schuyler Hamilton is working her ass off to the brink of exhaustion. I worry about her but knowingly how stubborn and hard headed she can be sometimes. I often worry about her physical and mental state. I hope she doesn’t scare me like last month when she was buried alive under all those paperworks. That woman is seriously gonna give me a heart attack one these days. Anyway, as a good friend basically the mother friend of our group. I always tend to check up on her before leaving the office. Knowing that her answer will be that she’ll be spending another night here at the orphanage. I wasn’t going to argue with her about it but still at least take one day off. Then again it has taken her husband almost a decade to finally take a break from work. Well, like wife, like husband as some may say.
I see her with papers scatter around the desk with multiple profile of some the new orphanages we receive from other states. Lightly knocking on the door which caught Eliza attention which she given me her usual soft smile.  
“Yes, Mrs. Burr. Is there anything you need?” she asks
“No, I’m letting you know that I’m heading home now. It’s already past ten o’clock so Aaron is probably worry sick about me”
Eliza chuckle lightly before understanding that Aaron is a bit overprotective of me but in a cute way. Deep inside her heart she was longing for the company of Alexander but he and their children were at Upstate. Apparently, visiting her father until catching up with Lafayette mid-way through the journey to South Carolina. They wanted surprise John with a visit of their own unannounced. I can understand her loneliness but she made the choice to stay behind for the orphanage and for me. We share our goodbyes before taking my leave as I left the door to be locked. Since I didn’t want any strangers or psycho manic having the intention to murder my innocent friend. Anyway, during my walk on the way I notice a tall male with a noticeable black eye. I whine on the inside feeling that he either got it from a bar fight or from his wife.
Domestic abuse isn’t uncommon sadly and seeing the abuse victim walking toward to our orphanage is heartbreaking but brave as well. What weird about him is that he’s wearing a large black hat with a long black coat. Perhaps to cover the bruises and the scars he received from his spouse. But that one thing stood out from his outfit was a tight red shirt that would grasp on his muscular chest. Ignoring my appearance despite me waving at him to be polite but I didn’t care. He continue to walk toward the direction of the orphanage before looking at the window in which located Eliza office. It made my heart skip a beat just for a moment but there wasn’t I couldn’t do since I’m off work.
Walking away from the scene as I pray deeply that this doesn’t become that I think would lead to. I hope that Eliza doesn’t do something stupid that would cost her marriage. Then again, our Lord works in mysterious ways than beyond our imagination. I simply shrug and ignore the tangles of knot that bewling with one gut to another.
Theodosia Sr
There’s nothing like summer in the city.
Someone under stress meets someone looking sexy
There’s trouble in the air, you can smell it
And Eliza is by herself....
I’ll let her tell it
Eliza POV
I was left alone in this semi-huge orphanage just by myself working on each of the children files. Just the ones that I’m assign to but that wasn’t enough. By that, I mean the only ones here are the servants on night shift. They look after the kids making they’re sleeping peacefully. Or looking after the ones that were deeply sicks and so they manage their medication from here and there. Sighing to myself out of despair as I thought about my darling Alexander and my friendly Lafayette. They decided to go Upstate in order to visit my father since the children dearly misses him. Along with the midsummer is when they’re going to visit Laurens in South Carolina since it been so long since they last met. Mulligan is going to meet on the middle part of the journey since it would be nice to create a surprise visit for John. It’s nice to know that they all have each others but Angelica and I are separated from miles apart. Not to mention...I lost Peggy from the war after she was shot..from a signal gunshot wound. Sacrificing her life for an innocent child that had nothing to do with it. Except being a daughter of a sl....I can’t bring myself to say it. But yes, that event change me and Angelica a lot especially toward my father who clearly cherish her since she is one of his beloved daughters.
Leaving behind her husband and beautiful son behind but we still visit them but enough of the depress thing. I harshly rubbed my eyes as I been here at my office for a week. Brushing my fingers into my semi greasy hair and thought I should go home as well. Packing my things up as I thought about Alexander just holding in his arms. As we share the bed we slept in together. Or having Lafayette just escorting me around the city while trying to make me laugh. His corny jokes somehow manage to make me laugh from here and there. Just would’ve been nice to have one of them here by my side. Until I heard a knock from downstairs.
Eliza
I haven’t slept in a week
I was weak, I awake
When I’m alone in my room, sometimes I stare at the wall
Longing for Lafayette, Missing my Alexander
I heard a knock on the door, I knew it wasn't my husband That’s when Mister James Reynolds walked into my life He said:
Walking downstairs before opening the door to see a tall man with a large black hat and long black coat. Quite an odd outfit but I brush it off. I notice the black eye on his face which aches my heart. Knowing that this black eye must’ve come from his abusive spouse. I offer him some tea as we discuss in the living room before introducing himself to be Mr. James Reynolds. Which he announce his reasonings of why coming to the orphanage so late at night.
James Reynolds
I know you are a woman of honor
I’m so sorry to bother you at home
But I don’t know where to go
And I came here all alone...
Eliza:
He said...
James Reynolds
My wife been doing me wrong
Beating me...
Cheating me...
Mistreating me...
Suddenly, she up and gone
And, I don’t have the means to go on
I felt extremely upset to know about this poor going through an abusive marriage. Not to mention that he has a young daughter only about five years old. Wondering how could I help this man and his daughter as well. Giving me the facts that she comes and goes from three days to weeks, lead to months from on end. Decided to give him some extra crash that I’ve stock away in her desk drawer. Pulling out approximately about thirty bucks which is quite a lot back then. Thirty bucks could’ve equivalent to like a hundreds. Then again it’s the 1700s, so it wasn’t an issue trying to store a few extra cash. Giving, Mr. Reynolds the money to see that he’s very grateful that anyone would loan him such a large amount of money. Wiping the tears of joy away before leaning his arm to hold onto. Well, I didn’t see a problem for a woman to escort a find young man home.
Eliza:
So I offered him a loan, I offered to walk him home, he said
James Reynolds:
You’re too kind mam
Eliza
I gave him thirty bucks that I have stock away
He lived a block away, he said:
James Reynolds:
This one’s mine, mam
Surprisingly the the orphanage isn’t that too far off from where Reynolds live at. Then again, he live only a block away so it was only a short ten minutes. I would stand outside just letting the kind man to enter inside his house safe and sound. Hopefully, his wife is either asleep or isn’t home at the moment which brought a tight knot in my stomach.Then, i could go home and take a long hot bath and probably take the day off tomorrow. Since I haven’t slept nor bathe in a week. So, I probably smell very sticky which isn’t very ladylike of me. Turning away as I started to walk in the direction of where my home was. About to take my leave I felt James hand grabbing my own with a light blush on his face. Veryly confuse, as I didn’t prepare myself of what was about to happen next.
Eliza:
Then I said, “well, I should head back home,” He turned red, He led me to his bed Place me between his legs and said:
James Reynolds:
Stay?
Eliza:
H...Hey...
James Reynolds:
Hey...
Not even knowing what just till the last second is when I’m between Reynolds legs. With his arms around my waist as I lay on top of his bare. Apparently, I must’ve believe that he unbutton his red shirt during the time I went blank. Feeling my entire body heating up and my face turning into cherry red. Wasn’t sure how I magically escape from the grasp of his arms but that wasn’t the case. As a married woman and Reynolds being a married man shouldn’t doing something so sinful. Not to mention, I have Alexander and can’t let myself be the one to break his heart. Reaching toward the door but before getting the grasp on the knob. Reynolds held me from behind just my heart accelerating and my body hitting once again.
Feeling his lips just leaving butterflies kissing across my neck to the my bare shoulders. Barely knowledge that this man has strip my dress off my body. Leaving me in my closet and others underclothing just leaving me to shiver. Turning me around as I face this man in the eyes but adirmating his bare chest. Lightly breathing heavily but soon I mentally slap myself. Telling myself that I have a husband and children nevertheless. This devilish man has this sinfully smirk as he place his chest just feeling his heart beating.
Eliza: That’s when I began to pray:
Lord, show me how to
Say no to this
I don’t know how to
Say no to this
But my god, he looks so helpless
And his body’s saying “hell yes”
James Reynolds:
Whoa...
Eliza:
Lord, show me how to
Eliza/ Ensemble (Aka the fandom): Say no to this
Trying to put my dress back on and get the heck out there but Reynolds has other plans. Holding me closer to him as our lips were just meter aparts just barely brushing each others. The grids in my mind were grinding wildly just telling me “Get the hell out of there”. But I couldn’t feel my body, didn’t have the courage to pull away. That wasn’t the case...I didn’t want to push myself away from this find man. Turning my face away for a moment. Until, I felt him lifting my chin up just meeting my gaze to his before leaning. His lips against my own just made everything I have thought just few out the window. Before he lead me to the once again.
Eliza: I don’t know how to Eliza/ The fandom Say no to this Eliza: In my mind, I’m tryin’ to go The Fandom: Go! Go! Go!
Eliza: Then his mouth is on mine, and I don’t say…
Throughout the entire time I spent with this stranger of man just letting him pleasure. Just forgetting Alexander, Lafayette, Angelica, the kids. Basically just everyone I’ve ever knew as he and I done it in his bed. At his house, where his wife could’ve walk in on us but I didn’t care. I was alone and longing for companion. But my mind is screaming me with rage literally scolding for doing a cruel act. Letting myself get involved in adultery that I’ll soon regretted later on.
The Fandom:
No! No! Say no to this!
No! No! Say no to this!
No! No! Say no to this!
No! No! Say no to this!
Third POV
Unaware by his wife adultery with another married man, Alexander Hamilton a proud father and helpless husband. Smiling happily while looking at the pendant that his late younger sister- in law, Peggy gave to him. It was originally a birthday gift but the widely woman decided to give this little gremlin as a wedding. Chucking by the memories of the late Peggy but blush while smiling a little. It was a picture of him and Eliza on their wedding day which brought warm memories to him. That day brought heartbreaks to both Lafayette and Laurens. As the French general has fallen deeply in love with Elizabeth Schuyler but given her up for his brother. While John is in love with his best friend but was already marriage and have a daughter of his own. Still, they wanted to see this Caribbean immigrant keeping a beautiful smile while basketing his love for Eliza.
The Hamilsquad has finally reunited after being seperated from the war for far too long. Which has been nearly a decade or more since the four men last saw each others. Apparently, Burr is suppose to meet up with the others at Lauren house but wasn’t able to at the last minute. As his daughter has gotten ill which is terrible for a child to be sick during the summer. Anyway, nearly getting side tracked as the four males were playing around with the children. Dancing with them, playing with them, and etc. As the children run around Alexander pull his pendant. Staring at the picture at his beautiful as he felt helpless once again after all these years during their marriage.
Alexander / The Fandom:
Helpless!!
(Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey)
Looking into your eyes
And the sky’s the limit
(Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey)
I’m helpless
(Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey)
Lafayette saw his brother smile weakly while spinning around like the lovesick puppy that Hamilton is. Walking away from the immigrant as the French male heart tighten a bit knowing fully well that Eliza will never be his. He has come to terms with it but still heartbroken after all these years. Now, married with another woman in France with children of their own. Yet, Lafayette still loves Eliza and that would never change. Even that meant marrying someone else. As one brother is smiling happily with hearts flying around him as the other brother was staring out the window. A single tear rolled down his caramel skin before brushing it away in order not to let others know.
Alexander/Lafayette
Will she ever be satisfied?
(Down for the count,
And I’m
Drowning’ in them)
She will never be satisfied
Back at New York is where both men were unaware that Eliza is sleeping with another married man. But also growing mutual feelings for him as well. As Eliza woken up from his bed in shock and disgusted with herself for letting this happen. Trying to break it off and made sure this was a one time only moment. Well ain’t that fantasy that Eliza suddenly ask for too much. As the guilt and regrets will arrive years later and she won’t even how the affair being leak out. Though she didn’t care and immediately left the house luckily, no one was around to started ridiculous gossip. Heading straight home to take a bath and sleep hopefully this is the final counter she’ll have with Reynolds. Or so she thought.
Eliza: I wish I could say that was the last time I said that last time. It became a pastime A month into this endeavor I received a letter From a Mrs. Maria Reynolds, even better, it said: Maria: Dear Madam, I hope this letter finds you in good health And in a prosperous enough position to put wealth In the pockets of people like me: down on their luck You see, that was my husband who you decided to Eliza: Shhhh—
A month past by and her affair with Reynolds continue and escalated to him spending multiple night at her house. As they slept on the same bed that she with her darling Alexander. No matter how many time she wanted to call this affair off. Reynolds always seduce her back into his arms by that charming and charismatic attitude of his. Those methods always make her legs jelly and wobbling. It lead them to exchanging tiny little love letters from here and there. Until one day, at her office Theodosia brought her letter which was sent from Mrs. Maria Reynolds. Feeling her blood run before locking the door. Reading the telegrams which is promptly by none other than Reynolds wife. Claiming that she knows about the affair and herself as well. A large lump began to form in his throat as she continue reading the paper. Feeling that dark presented behind Eliza back just feeling Maria mocking her for sleeping with her own husband.
Yet, that not even the worst part.
Maria: Uh-oh! You made the wrong sucker a cuckold So time to pay the piper for the dress you stripped And hey, you can keep seeing’ that piece of shit If the price is right: if not I’m telling your man
Straight up blackmailing the young wife that if she doesn’t pay in the correct. This other wife would spill the details to her Alexander. In pure anger, she races out of her office but not without leaving confuse looks on her coworkers face’s. Nearly running toward Reynolds house as she proudly let herself to slam the door shut harshly. Racing toward upstairs as I saw James right before myself as I proceeded to slap him hard across the face. Shock but also hurt by this reaction as Eliza shove the letter in front of the man’s face.
Eliza: I hid the letter and I raced to his place Screamed
“How could you?!”
in his face He said: James No, Mam!!
Eliza:
Half dressed, apologetic. A mess, he looked
Pathetic, he cried:
James:
Please don’t go, mam!
Not caring if this man was even half naked or half dress in front of her. This affair is officially over but Reynolds grabbed Eliza’s hand. Not wanting to lose of what they have during the entire period of summer. Pulling herself away from this man with a look of anger spreading on her expression. Whimpering on the inside as Reynolds never saw this side of Eliza before. She was so kind and thoughtful toward him. Never forgetting her generosity to donated a large sum of money just for his daughter Susan. Holding Eliza in his arms once again but this married woman firmly pushes herself out of his reach. Tears were streaming down his face before on his knees. Betting this kind hearted woman to not leave him alone with his wife. Despite not knowing either he was serious or was all of this an act.
Eliza:
So was your whole story a setup?
James:
I don’t know about any letter!
Eliza:
Stop crying
God damnit, get up!
James:
I didn’t know any better
Eliza:
I am ruined...
Frantically pulling her hair while her own tears flooded her face. Realizing that consequences of what this affair leading to. This could ruin an entire innocent happy marriage and another marriage leading to a divorce in court. Both of them panicking as Maria has full control of them especially Eliza. Since she did indeed fallen trip into their spider webs of lies. The married man tries to persuade to stay with in his arms. Work before and show work again. Doesn’t need any other woman but her at the time being. Even it may cost him his life. Holding her into his arms once again while wiping her tears away with a soft touch.
Eliza / James:
Please don’t leave me with her, I’m helpless
(I am helpless—how could I do this?)
Just give her what he wants and you can have me
Eliza:
I don’t want you
James:
What?
Eliza:
I don’t want you
James/Eliza
Whatever you want (I don’t...)
If you pay,
You can
Stay!!!!
Eliza wanted to pull away but didn’t have the strength nor the energy to do so. Letting Reynolds cherish her one last time. Clinging onto him before letting the small kisses into full on make out. Which them on the bed once again. Just like how the first night when they first met. Eliza feeling regretful but yet a bit satisfied about this affair. Not sure why...she didn’t even know her self. They just want the pleasurable moment for one last time.
Eliza
Lord, show me how to
Say no to this
I don’t know how to
Say no to this
Cause the situation is helpless
And his body screaming “hell yes”
Lord, show me how to
Say no to this
Eliza/James
How can I say not to this?!
Eliza:
There is nowhere I can go?!
When his body on mine I do not say
Sharing a kisses from here and there from the lips, neck, and other sort etc. James notice a matching pendant around Eliza neck. Open by itself to see the man that Eliza is currently married to in made him freeze for a moment. Just staring at the picture on the day on this woman married her husband. Shaking lightly before shutting it quickly just wanting to get this over this. That picture suddenly began mocking him. Feeling this affair might put a tired on Eliza marriage with Alexander. Which he praise that doesn't happen. Which it's rare to have this emotions that he never had before.
Still both Reynolds and Eliza mind were screaming at them.Telling these two adults that “NO! This isn’t right” basic stuff. That both of them knew but decided to ignore it.
Eliza/James/The Fandom
Yes (Yes!)
Say no to this!
No!
Yes (Yes!)
Say no to this!
No!
Yes (Yes!)
Say no to this!
No!
Yes (Yes!)
Say no to this!
After this finally orderal, Eliza slowly and shamefully getting dressed as Reynolds lay in bed. Not looking at each others seem to be the best choice at the moment. Eliza wiped a few tears feeling so dirty and disgusted with herself. Her actions. Hopefully that she can put this in the past. And forget that it ever happen in the first place. Pulling out two envelope from the pocket of her dress. Both fill with crash.
Eliza:
Say no to this...
I don’t
Eliza/James:
Say no to this
Eliza:
There is nowhere I can go
The fandom:
Go, Go, Go
Right before her stood Maria Reynolds at the doorway with a little girl by her side. Apparently, this is their daughter that James mention before. Wearing a beautiful red dress that seem to share the same color and color of her husband shirt. Having a smug look on her face full aware of what just happened since this bedroom. But she could care less since its the money she need for a lawyer during a divorce court. But sweet little Eliza doesn’t need to know about that.
Maria:
So?
The other married woman sigh in defeat as she place the two full envelope on Maria hands. About thousands dollars in total. Looking down as the child stare at in confusion and curious of what was happening. But her innocent must be protected and so for that. The deed has been done and all of this affair is just hush hush. Racing out of the house in a rush with tears threatening to leave her eyes. Returning back to the orphanage in an hour as Theodosia, Martha, Dolley didn’t notice her return. Until hearing you close the door to her office and locking it. Her back was press against the wood before sliding down as she held her knee tightly. Tears spring down to the fabric of her dress before quietly whisper to herself.
“Nobody needs to know”
Nearly given  up writing  this fanfic but I made myself to finish. But yeah.. hope y'all enjoy
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tobias-ichiroy · 7 years
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The Color of Autumn
Saga of Chad, Part | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 |
The Hunter sat at the base of a tree, hidden from the forest path. His moss green cloak dissolved his figure into the knee-high vegetation of the forest’s floor. He was silent. Not a breath. Not a heartbeat. His heavy eyes stared blankly forward as if time were nil.
The pattering of footsteps marked the approach of his prey, yet he remained stone. A light humming accompanied the footsteps; a jolly tune the Hunter swore he once knew. The performance was cut short by the whizzing of ropes and a loud squeal. The Hunter came to life, using his cracked oaken club to leverage himself off the ground.
“Help!” beckoned a wavering voice from the road. A man hung from an ankle nearly four feet off the ground, wiggling violently to free himself.
Silent as a specter, the Hunter made his approach. The oaken club met the base of the man’s skull with all the force the Hunter could muster. Lifelessly the body swung; a swift end.
An air of solemnity hung over the Hunter as he disassembled the complex ropework. He could feel the Hunger approaching. He abhorred It. It would take control, transform him. But there was no option. He had to eat.
As he dropped the body to the dirt, the man’s satchel burst open revealing a slew of fruits. The apples caught the Hunter’s eye. He recognized these; the juicy, natural sweetness was one of the few things he could remember. He desperately threw himself to the ground for one of the delicious green orbs, grabbing one in each hand. Hesitantly, he took a bite. The flavor was revolting — reminiscent of gravel and ooze — and the juices burned the innards of his mouth.
“No!” he shrieked, spitting the poison back to the earth.
He had known it would be this way. Pleasures of taste were of a life, long past.
His anger made him hungrier. It was coming.
“Not here.” He flung the satchel over his shoulder, leaving behind the poison, and grasped the man’s ankles. His trophy was a portly fellow, a good catch, but a chore to haul. About a hundred feet into the trees was a nicely hidden spot for him to execute the deed. He neatly removed his moss green cloak and waited for It to arrive.
The Hunger was sated. The Hunter came to his senses on his knees with viscera of what was once a man strewn about the forest floor. The mangled remnants of his prey lay before him in a red conglomerate. He had grown accustom to such a sight.
There had been no witnesses to his feeding. Not even the Hunter. Only the trees, It, and whichever god may have been looking his way. Not his god, but surely a god. He sighed. Not in relief but in knowing that the clock had been rewound. Another three or four days before he would have to hunt again. It was time to move on.
“Thank you,” he said with a lowered head. He took the satchel which contained several rolls of parchment, a small three-stringed instrument, and a pen. The instrument was equally useful to the forest floor as it was in his possession, but perhaps he could get some coin for it.
Only then did he notice the trees. It was very subtle, but the canopy was speckled with orange. A sight he hadn’t seen since...
His head throbbed, and he remembered...
He traveled on a forest path, similar to this one.The mid-autumn breeze tickled his frazzled black hair. Then came the thunder. He spun around to the sight of three enormous warhorses, each mounted by a Graa. They were an uncommon sight, but he remembered every detail. Their twisting horns were painted orange, brighter than the trees. Their black and orange armor covered them from neck to waist. Their legs were exposed, though the thick tufts of fur — which went all the way to their hooves — could stop steel on its own. Their alchemized guises chanted, “Grah, grah, grah,” in unison with each step of their war beasts.
They were upon him. His legs would not obey his mind. The first and second stallions flew by with such velocity that he lost his footing. The third approached with arm held high, wielding a large oak club. He could feel his body shatter as the club collided with his chest. Bones and organs alike rendered into paste. He traveled a dozen feet before he met the ground again as a heap of a man. The power of the Graa’s swing stripped the club from its grip, but the beast did not stop. Both the club and himself were left in the dirt, fractured and broken. He lay there, gasping at the canopies; their splashes of orange blocked out the sky until he faded away.
A ticking clock — the smell of tea — a stiff bed.
“Get up, my son. It’s your birthday. A fresh start.”
He remembered everything. That devil of a man had brought him back; cursed him to this life of pain and sin. The image of his straight black beard and cold dead eyes stuck in the Hunter’s mind. The man’s pungent scent of thyme still lingered in his nostrils.
At first, he idolized the man. That was until the decay began; both in the body and the mind. Then It appeared. It rewired his instincts. Typical food became undesirable, and he hungered for more illicit game.
One autumn ago, he had died and gone to hell; his day of undeath. However, he still feared death. If he did not, he could have ended it countless times. His will to live was strong, or perhaps It was preventing him.
Without realizing where he had been walking, he had found the end of the road. The shabby wooden sign read “Corb”. The Hunter did not normally fraternize with his prey, but perhaps they had information for him. He pulled his cloak tight around his neck and walked into the town.
It was an unimpressive place. A small square with shops and some sort of meeting hall in the center. It looked to be a tavern. Typical. It was the only open building in the town, so he went.
He left his oaken club by the door and jostled the handle of the wooden door. It took a kick to unjam from the doorframe. The entire town seemed to be present. Nearly thirty raggedly clothed men and women struggled to speak over one another. A few wandering eyes caught sight of their moss-colored guest and went back to their business. The Hunter pulled his hood tighter to his head and made a move for the bar.
“What’ll ye have, stranger?” the barkeep asked carefully, looking at the Hunter’s concealed face.
The Hunter set his satchel on the floor and slid a single resplendent gold coin across the bar.
“Do you know of anyone who specializes in…taboo magics?”
The barkeep slid the coin into his pocket without taking his eyes off the stranger.
“No. Now can I get ye a drink? Ale’s not great but it’ll get the job done.”
“I don’t partake. Thank you.” He lowered his head politely and turned to leave, but there was an obstruction. The most unremarkable drunken man stood smiling with glazed eyes.
“Oi! Stranger! Do you’s, perchance, know musics and such?” he asked, struggling to maintain his balance. “Our musics man di’nt show and is awfully dull without ‘im. Would you’s like to sing a song with me?”
The Hunter noticed the lack of music. There was only the chatter of the people.
“No, thank you. I don’t partake.” He tried to move around the wobbling man, but found resistance.
“What’dya mean? Oi! Chad! This ‘ere guy don’t partake in musics!” He put a hand out and got a handful of the Hunter’s moss green cloak. Instinctively the Hunter swatted at the hand, but only succeeded in knocking the drunk off balance. He plummeted to the wooden floorboards, bringing the cloak with him. Scrambling to the floor, the Hunter reclaimed his veil, but it was too late.
“What in the hell!” Chad yelled louder than he ever had and pointed his greasy finger. “Monster! Barney, I’m comin’!”
A shrill shriek came from a woman, and the tavern fell silent. Almost sixty eyes trained on the Hunter’s features. His skin was nearly the same green as his cloak. In some places of his arms, bone felt the air. Sheets of skin either hung off his face or were entirely missing, so much so that his rotting molars were clearly visible. His head was mostly bare, but the hair he did have was a dark gray and wispy like a ghost. Without the cloak, the stench of his rotting skin radiated freely.
He jumped off Barney, who had started vomiting from a mixture of drunken nausea and the vile aroma, and flung his cloak back around his neck.
Chad had lied to Barney. He wasn’t coming to help him. He truly intended to, but he failed to locate the courage. As if the Hunter was a giant spider, he cautiously danced around at a safe distance.
“Go on, get!” was all Chad could manage to say. “Get!”
A mug of flat ale hit the floor next to the Hunter. Then another. There was one exit for the Hunter to take: the way he came in. Chad, and two more men now, stood between him and the door, and they appeared prepared to kill. No one else was brave enough, or drunk enough, to stand up to this unknown creature.
A woman spoke out, “Someone fetch Dominic, oh! He’ll rid us of this fiend!” In response, a boy bolted out the door.
The Hunter had no plans to meet Dominic. His stoic eyes metamorphosed into hatred. The Hunter embraced the Hunger. The stance he took became that of a feral beast: low to the ground, arms off to his sides. He exhaled an otherworldly snarl, making everyone in the room retreat a step.
Chad was too drunk and opportunistic to move out of the way.
“Think of the stories…legendary…” he muttered to himself.
The Hunger launched itself toward the door with inhuman speed. Chad immediately regretted his position. The monster tore through him with one claw, slicing him from breast to breast, but It did not stop its dash for the exit. In It’s frenzy, it rammed the wooden door, shattering it from its hinges.
The boy had not made it more than a hundred feet before the beast crashed through the door. The Hunger saw its prey. Within seconds, the boy was a hostage, dragged by the wrist at full speed. The orange speckled forest swallowed them both.
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