if something tho, i have gotten better about writing just to share with one person and just enjoying creating that way so. thats very nice

TALKING TO MARSH MADE ME REALIZED I NEED TO GO BACK TO POSTING ON TUMBLR LMAOOOO anyway

HAIIIII im back :3 HAVE SOME ART TEHEE this is my most recent utdr au:

✨EEPYTALE✨

the au where everyone is eepy and they all hang out and it's basically a slice of life and stuff and idk EHEEE anyway-

idk i'll try be more active here SORRY FOR DISSAPPEARING FOR ALMOST 2 MONTHS LMAO

I am doing good !! I'm motivated and I've been outside and it was snowing but I also wrote for my event hehe <33 my advent calendar event where I send each mutual once in the whole December a short drabble like yeahh 💕💕

And you?? How are you??❤️

AAAA that's great to hear !! I saw the thingy but I didn't read past the read more thingy as to not get spoiled like you said? I think that's what the post said I was half asleep staring at yui in disappointment at the time

im happy to see that you're becoming more motivated now :D I'm gonna be your little cheerleader (as if I wasn't already) and help wherever you're unmotivated I'll be your recharge boy >:D

i am becoming less eepy but I am really happy because I got my daily dose of yui (unfortunately) and vi so I'm really happy :D as you can see because this post is there paragraphs long which is a semblance to my hyperness this afternoon since I've talked to both of you within the same hour

let's see,, I've been trying to think of what to write to get my blog going❓I've also been thinking of joining the favonius library thanks to ari :D

I have been really motivated whenever it comes to like drawing lately and whatnot !! I have so many ideas on what to draw that idk where to start thoSJDKJ

I've also been eating more in private and I think that's also good >:D

oops uhh anyways thank you for coming to my speech remember guys vote Oliver for president 2024

im sorry but why are you obsessed with slappy (peter lorre fish)

Simple answer: he's my favorite character and deserves all the love he can gets! :)

Long answer: idk he clicked in my brain years ago. He's like a parasitic disease of the brain. Eating away until nothing is left.

I always find it ironic the first time I watched Spongebob's Big Birthday Blowout, I didn't care for Slappy much. Though I was catching up on the show and was weary of how weird the show was. The 2nd time I watched the episode, I was more accustomed to how weird modern Spongebob can be so I ended up liking him a lot. Something about the eyes, his sleepy demeanor, its uncomfortable but silly. I joked back then it was likely a remnant of liking Salad Fingers beforehand. Now I have a mutual who likes Slappy who ALSO liked Salad Fingers a lot. So there's a chance that there's a Salad Fingers to Slappy pipeline jk.

Idk slappy is just adorable. The begining of the Patrick Show REALLY made him adorable. And I guess I always had an affinity to creepy things so it clicked. I think he's silly. I remember in the beginning I thought it aas funny I should like such an ugly and disgusting character and I enjoyed bugging my SB followers about it. But overtime I grew more obsessed because that's how my brain works. Part of it is indeed exaggeration because it creates a distance between me and my followers and I prefer that, kinda like playing a character. But he genuinely is my favorite. I vibe with how he is a weirdo and doesn't care and deliberately weirds people out for his own enjoyment.

My obsession for Slappy also lead to other things, discovering he's a Peter Lorre characters and eventually the actor himself. Its genuinely interesting how much stuff this bug eyed Hungarian actor ended up influencing such a large portion of animation. You can find an imitation of him in nearly EVERY cartoon. Spongebob fans like to claim Slappy is just ripping off Looney Tunes but that is such a lazy idea. If you had any idea hOW MANY Peter Lorre caricatures there is, you'd know that Slappy was inevitable lmao.

Slappy is just a pleasant character. I'm really happy it introduced me to so much. I REALLY enjoyed going through Peter Lorre's discography and the fanbase he has on tumblr. I've learned so much and it wouldn't have happened if I didn't become obsessed with Slappy. I think that's also a big thing too, I really hope Slappy does push people into getting into Peter Lorre movies because they're genuinely good. I've already had a handful of mutuals who ended up getting into his movies cuz I pushed Slappy so hard. So its working >:D

I don't really have much energy to post on this blog as much anymore. Chronic zero energy eepy gurl syndrome. I feel like I said as much as I could say about spongebob and I don't have as much time as I had during the pandemic. I do enjoy having mutuals and socializing through this blog but I often have a hard time keeping up with things and I am scared of my ask box because it's too much to go through,,,, if I do come on here then its to gush about stuff I like in the show like Slappy.

But also my more cynical opinion: I think fandoms have always had this thing where people obsess over male characters and give them attention that is sometimes not even deserved while also neglecting the female characters.

Often times it's male attracted individuals who do this because they are likely somewhat crushing on the characters and they are the majority in fandom spaces, thus end up over prioritizing male characters. This isn't exclusive to being male attracted tho but sometimes does influence opinions. In general fandoms always tend to over-humanize the male characters and overlook the female characters because brain worms that you probably already know what I'm referring to. Starts with a P and ends with a Y.

I've seen this all the time and I know I'm guilty of it too, I'm aware.

Come on, I'm in a fandom, I'm a girl who's also male attracted. Would any of this had occurred if this was a female character? I can notice my own biases.

He so silly <3

top 5 characters of ALL time

i ask the difficult questions around here

OH. FUCK

um. UM

good lord . im basing this off 1) the characters i’ve been most attached to over the years AND 2) the characters i think are most well written. im also limiting myself to two max per media. so. yes.. these will probably be the characters that have affected me the most so. yeah.

warning: a lot of shitty people!!! plus spoilers for: witch’s heart, danganronpa, your turn to die, and minor genshin story quest spoilers

5. izuru kamukura from danganronpa

one of them is from danganronpa. embarrassing! /lh anyways i loved danganronpa so much but i loved nothing more than hajime and/or izuru’s storyline. so royally fucked up. if u don’t know it and don’t care abt dr spoilers: hajime is average but wants to go to a school where talented people go but his family doesn’t have enough money to buy him into the ‘average’ part of the school so he gets a scholarship in return for becoming a human test subject for the academy to use as they please (and adding insult to injury hes named after the academy’s founder). they essentially turn him into an emotionless superhuman with no memory of who he was previously, however it’s possible some remnants of who he was before remained as we can see him cry after his former best friend’s death. but then this super weapon meant to be used by the academy is converted to the side of evil and manipulated into seeking destruction over protection all in the name of incurable boredom. eventually kamukura is put into a sort of “restoration program” where he and other students of the academy lose all memories beyond their first day at the academy, turning kamukura back into hajime and are put on a desert island in order to possibly help mentally rescue them, only for THAT to be hijacked and for hajime to live as himself only to discover in the end he was his own enemy. ANYWAYS after THAT long winded explanation: izuru’s character was just extremely interesting to me at the time and even now, i’ve read fics about alternative endings for him that i love and i really wish more was done with him tbh.. izuru/hajime is really an interesting character and i think he deserves a lot more love because he was FASCINATING

4. diluc ragnvindr from genshin impact

this one is actually gonna be very different from the others on the list probably LMAO but. first off. diluc made me realize i was gay and transmasc. so. there’s THAT SHAJSBAKD

but. anyways. i loved diluc’s story so much. like he’s such an interesting character. diluc was a prodigy destined for greatness at a young age, getting his vision at age ten, becoming the youngest cavalry captain ever, essentially doing everything his father never got to do. he was the perfect son, and he was happy. and then his dad died AND his adoptive brother admitted to being a spy both on his 18th birthday, causing him to become depressed and to abandon his vision, and soon after his post as a knight (along with some outside interference). diluc became a reclusive loner, distanced himself from the city he loved and even the people he loved. and yet, through all of it, he couldn’t stop himself from caring. from the shadows he helped to protect the city and put himself at risk numerous times for the sake of the people he loved.

and also, diluc is a BADASS.. like .. the bridge scene?? getting banned from fantasy russia for killing too many people??? idk. all in all diluc is and probably always will be my favorite genshin character and i think he deserves a lot more love in the fandom because GOD knows he deserves it

3. ashe bradley from witch’s heart

took out matty my apologies. i didn’t really talk abt him but was also crazy about him. ashe and matty (sorry got rid of his like 2 sentences) spawned the most batshit insane ocs of mine and they completely kickstarted me creating these horrible awful people. i’m not gonna go too in depth here cause i’m eepy but: ashe’s family was killed in a fire and he is trying to revive them by being a witch hunter. ashe as a character is so FUCKED and was the most fascinating factor of WH i think cause he just made it so much more interesting.. getting to see his motivation and how he was trying to do the right thing in the WORST possible way is soul crushing and amazing and i love this game so much for it. everyone in that game really deserved so much better than the hand they were dealt but. i’m a sucker for the ones who Cannot be normal about it.

2. shin tsukimi/“sou hiyori” from your turn to die

SPEAKING OF BEING INCAPABLE OF BEING NORMAL. literally. the first (second. fine.) unhinged motherfucker i loved. and he was so similar to ashe in some ways.. shin (i’m gonna call him that sorry) discovered he had a 0% chance of survival so he decided to pretend to be someone else and then pretended to be the most horrible bastard ever and i LOVED him for it. the atrocities were great. idc. but it’s also sad that it’s the circumstance he was forced into yk??? idk. anyways. shin had such an impact on me i was insanely mental illness about him for so lonnnggg i dressed up as him for halloween one year…. god. anyways. i just am a sucker for fucked up little guys and he was such a good one

1. “midori” (sou hiyori) from your turn to die

hey that. that name is familiar. ohohohoho yea this motherfucker changed my brain chemistry i think . so let me explain.

u will not find a lot of characters like midori.. i love him and i was STILL!! cheering when he died bc he is such a HORRIBLE dude!!! he manipulated people (including CHILDREN) into unknowingly consenting to a “game” in which their lives would be toyed with for FUN, he faked his own murder and gaslit/ruined the life of the person who “killed” him, he’s not even a HUMAN anymore because he has DOLL parts (fun fact: another person has HIS human hands now!!!!!! yay!!!!!!) i believe he did a lot of human experimentation, he also stalked someone (the previous character) and pretended to be a high school student in order to manipulate him into doing things for him!! he created an ai who was programmed to be obsessively in love with him so he could use her for his benefit!! he enjoys seeing people uncomfortable and relishes in others pain!! it goes beyond him being apathetic towards others, he literally WANTS people to be hurt. the only time we see real emotion from him is in the face of death, because the only time he’s afraid of pain is if it’s his own. he’s an awful person all around but a FASCINATING one who although has driven me insane has also fascinated me for years. and. yeah. he’s my namesake. a very very interesting guy and i recommend playing yttd if you haven’t already cause it’s suuuuchhhhh a good game. pls

Its currently 6:16am and I'm on the toilet in the hotel bathroom while all my roommates are eepy cuddling (i was too it was great but i'm stupid ans booked my flight too early) and after tonight, i get it lol. I get why furry cons and fursuiting is so fun and frankly, addictive. Time to spill my guts out here lmao

Ok so for context i've been a furry for a while, like 2 years plus. But i was always in a weird spot about like going to conventions and fursuiting and all that "oh im not one of those weird furries who dresses up as a neon colored wolf in public." Granted I've also always never really cared for being too social beforehand and liked being a homebody. However obviously something has to change and that was when i got a lovely invite to go to megaplex 2023 with some online friends

Let me tell you this convention was an absolute trip. I picked some amazing roommates and a good con to go to, even though its in florida (blegh) because I was pretty much always having a great time. Having a good mix of experienced and unexperienced people helped to tame some of the newbie awkwardness without taking me out of my comfort zone toooo much. Did quite a bit of partying (though not to the same extent as a couple of our experienced roommates but being left out didn't cramp my style :3) and got to know some awesome people

One thing that really did it for me though by far was just being around people where i could be myself. Like there wasnt any pressure to fit in and be a certain way besides yourself. Sure dont be overly "weird", however you want to define weird at a furry convention, but besides that one caveat it was just so relaxed. I got to dress how i want and just let myself flourish. Everyone should have this kind of environment, its so incredibly good.

Now i meam what about suiting? Whats so good about putting on a big heavy suit of synthetic fluff that you can barely see out of and is hot asf and so on? Obviously its not a physical comfyness, like wearing a really nice set of PJs (though they can be hella comfy) but rather, a sort of comfort in ones own skin. Its dressing up yourself in a new way that better fits who you want to be. Being trans I vibe with this IMMENSELY and trying out some other people's stuff, yeah it really solidified a lot of feelings I already had. Like putting on the head and really just, feeling the character you are now. Moving past being just your human self and moving into someone new. Or maybe its just who you are truly and being more of "i am this." Idk everyone vibes with it in a different way.

A big thing was phantom touch, a feeling that people get when they get touched somewhere that isn't actually their living breathing feeling body. Its incredibly common in those who've lost limbs, but its also really prevalent in vr settings (i.e vrchat) and obviously in suiters. Like there are lots of people who feel people touching their suits and feeling it like its their actual skin, its pretty insane. Our brains are amazing little masses of meat that are capable of the unthinkable, to the point where someone entirely detached from you besides a visual and audio representation of someone played through basically a couple screens strapped to your face can result in you feeling someone else's touch. Something something touch starved something something human brains are very predictive and pattern seeking, but whatever who cares about the biology when it feels so damn good.

I was already transhumanist before convention, major fan of protogens and all that (what i wanna be a cute ass robot that'd be awesommmme) but what really got me was just putting on someone else's furry head while on things I'm not stupid enough to post online about and fucking woah, it was so eye opening. Just putting on the mask and like, BEING them was entirely different than anything else. Sure I played tons of vrchat and loved the avatars I put on and vibed with them. But this time I was really feeling it and was able to exist as someone much more like me. Sure not perfect, but it was enough that I really connected with the experience.

Yeah the fuck did i just type out, eh whatever im having a good time :3