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#idk im just much more comfortable in my elementary school. i guess bc ive worked there before and i went to school there
britneyshakespeare · 1 year
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why does scheduling my work days give me so much stress and anxiety
#i was supposed to do my first day at the high school today but i had literally so much anxiety i could not fall asleep last night no matter#what. i had so much dread. i took so much melatonin lol.#i could shut my brain off till i went into the application and deleted my schedule for the day#ive just been feeling so fatigued and exhausted since i got covid it's crazy. sometimes i'll have bursts of energy where im productive#but yesterday i was just so tired from loading the washing machine. just. fucking sorting clothes and putting them in#that i had to lie down on the floor for a few minutes in the middle of it#not my finest moment#tales from diana#i didn't have anything scheduled for tomorrow and i thought 'maybe if i feel better tonight ill call in'#but i dont feel. super better tonight. and the only thing that i could do tomorrow at my preferred school is kindergarten subbing#for like the main classroom teacher. which i havent done before so i figured 'yeah im not gonna get my anxiety up 2 days in a row'#i deserve to sleep tonight after all and i think if i committed to that i wouldnt be able to#but i am going into my elementary school on wed-thur-friday of this week. wednesday is only a half day but they'll probably find smth for me#to do in the afternoon. they usually do. and im fine w that.#idk im just much more comfortable in my elementary school. i guess bc ive worked there before and i went to school there#as a wittle student waaaay back in the day. like i know the building and it doesn't scare me and i know a good amount of kids there#and the staff don't intimidate me. so yeah.#i did schedule my first job at the high school FOR REAL THIS TIME and it's next friday. hopefully ill be doing better by then.#im working the thursday before it at the elementary so i'll be in the rhythm of that. idk how to explain it but it's harder to go back#to work when ive taken a day off. like that's also why im not going in tomorrow.#friday (4/07) was the first day i worked since i got covid and that was fine but also. i was so anxious just to go in.#and so so so so tired when i got home. and all weekend.#yeah i wasn't ready to start working at the high school today. that was nonsense.#hopefully all will go well on wednesday thursday and friday of this week. im trying to restore my energy and fix my sleep. thatll do wonders#i hope. i hope i hope i hope
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yeont4n · 7 years
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Answer all!!
here we fuckn goooooooooo
we are bulletproof: if you could be any superhero, who would you be and why?
u kno that 1 girl from sky high whose only power was shapeshifting into a hamster? her. no reason
no more dream: if you woke up tomorrow to be incredibly famous, how would you react?
id go check my mailbox to collect all my free promotional gifts and then prolly fake my own death
i like it: if you could reverse any moment in your life, what would that moment be? 
there’s 1 thing but im not rlly gonna expose myself like tht on here smh
n.o: biggest pet peeve?
loud chewing/loud eating,,,,,,
we on: how do you deal with people who don’t like you?
i dont deal wit it lmfao it’s not my business who likes me n who doesn’t unless someone’s being particularly vocal about it:// in that case i’d prolly jus laugh about it
if i ruled the world: what would you do if you found out that you were an heir to a wealthy kingdom?
lmfao. idk tbh prolly decide which breed of dog i wanted to be known for loving
coffee: what’s your coffee order?
i dont order coffee often buh somethin w a lot of sugar.
cypher pt. 1: if you had to be part of a kpop group, what position would you want to be (i.e. leader, visual, lead vocal, dancer, rapper, maknae, etc.)
maknae i guess? how about staff
rise of bangtan: when and how did you get into the king and legends, also known as bangtan sonyeondan?
i saw a video of yoongi performing intro:nevermind in like 2015 n was :o ! buh never looked into it. in 2016 i saw the fire and bst dance practice vids and was like :0!??? but again, never looked into it. then finally spring day/not today mvs dropped n i FINALLY looked into who these boys were n jus fell down an ever spiraling rabbit hole.. now we here
satoori rap: what does home mean to you?
a feeling. i mean i have a few physical manifestations of the concept of home: my town, my school, my house. things i can return to. but really it’s a feeling isn’t it?? safety, familiarity, comfort, fondness
boy in luv: when you are interested in someone (romantically, sexually, etc.), does your behavior change?
yeah probably altho i dnt have many data points to go over rn
just one day: who would you want to spend the last day of your life with?
yall expectin me 2 say bts buh id want 2 be wit my friends n family . bts can b there 2 if they want
tomorrow: goal that you would like to achieve within the next year?
get into..... college.....
cypher pt. 2: one thing about yourself you wish people would appreciate more?
i never express appreciation n all that verbally thru words or physically thru touch buh i have my own ways of showin tht i care n i guess it dont count if i dont communicate explicitly like: hey ilu ! . what happened to actions speak louder than words smh
spine breaker: what is your weakness when it comes to spending money?
makeup!!!!!!!!!! >
jump: favorite childhood memory?
getting my dog tina!!!!
miss right: what is your ideal ‘type’?
physically i tend 2 like the boyish types likkee think taehyung inu era i guess. boy next door vibes; ive never rlly been into the macho build or the preppy, neat look, or the rough around the edges, angsty shithead badboy exterior model like i like my boys S.O.F.T.! puppy-ish!
personality wise i guess jusssss idk i’m gonna copy n paste a list of qualities i look 4 in a partner that i wrote for a different ask game a while back: Sense of humor, openmindedness, compassion, reliability, ability 2 communicate directly/emotional maturity, ambition/drive/work ethic, etc.
i like it pt. 2: dream date? 
yall prolly expecting me to say smthn like staying in n watching movies n eating junk but i’d prolly wanna go out n do smthn ngl. not a movie where u can hardly even speak or a dinner date where u feel trapped n stiff buh smthn fun n mildly competitive n engaging ??????? although jus chillin dont sound so terrible either
danger: have you ever had a near-death experience?
kinda not really it was on hampton beach n i had an allergic reaction but i wasnt on death’s door or nuthn
war of hormone: most embarrassing moment?
i bled thru my fucking pants in like 7th grade n it got on the chair! it was bad lol i was jus talking about this w my friend n she was like “yeah i remember that haha:)” shut up caitlin
hip hop lover: three songs that are meaningful to you?
moonlight sonata, ballade no. 1 in g minor, bts’ entire discography ties for 3rd
let me know: are you good at keeping secrets?
no lmfao . keeping my own, sure.
rain: most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?
some words that have never been used to describe me, grace: spontaneous, easy going, flexible. the most impulsive thing i’ve done is prolly take a random sidestreet omw home just for the heck of it lol
cypher pt. 3: favorite outfit to wear?
cute jeans w a belt, a crop top. white adidas. i like dresses too tho!! n i really like layered clothes (a mock turtle neck under a slip dress or like a pinstripe button up under a babydoll fit blouse. i jus think it’s fuckin adorable)
blanket kick: longest time you’ve spent lying in bed (sleeping or not)? 
prolly 2 or 3 days
24/7 = heaven: what are you most looking forward to?
fuck i rlly dk . doesnt that suck??
look here: do you have any hidden talents?
i can burp on command lmfaoofdj
second grade: proudest accomplishment?
dont ask me this if u dnt want to be made uncomfortable by how genuinely unproud of myself i am lol
i need u: are you in love?
wit k*m t*aehy*ng? yeah.
hold me tight: does physical contact comfort you?
no........... maybe i havent found the right person but it’s not my cup of tea generally speaking
love is not over: ever had your heart broken?
no but now i know what i can look forward to haha
dead leaves: how loyal are you?
im rlly loyal if that commitment is mutual. w my family i’m ride or die i’ll fuck anyone up who comes for my asshole brother idc!!!!!!!!!
move: last time you cried?
cant remember,, i dnt cry much. prolly watching reply 1988 when bo ra and her dad were exchanging letters on her wedding day.
butterfly: most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?
his name looks similar to my url thats the only hint im giving
run: do you like traveling? if so, where? what’s your dream vacation?
i dnt really like travelling tbh but i do wanna go back to korea one day. not necessarily as a tourist but as a diasporic korean person myself
ma city: if you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
idk. i cant imagine not living in the states tbh but i also cant say i love it here either
baepsae: do you vote and/or keep up with politics?
i can’t vote but i’m in my school’s youth vote committee which runs debates for local elections and registration drives at the end of the year. i kept up with politics a lot more last year but after the election i jus got 2 bitter. i know what’s going on but only sort of surface level smh
dope: what did you want to be when you were younger? how does it compare to what you want to be now?
i wanted to be a teacher lmfao and i wanted to commute to college n save $$ bc i was a practical little fucker even when i was 6. these days i’m not that interested in teaching bc a) i’d be objectively bad at it and b) i was a classroom mentor for elementary schools and... realized i can’t work w kids tht small every damn day i’d rlly snap
fire: are you a spontaneous person?
no~
save me: your favorite place on earth?
rn??? m y bed
young forever: what is one movie from your childhood that you will always treasure?
august rush lol
boys with fun: you’re going on a roadtrip with seven other people– dead, alive, fictional, real, famous, or not. who are they, and why?
really......... seven other people:)? guess.
converse high: how many pairs of shoes do you own?
12??? 3 are the same black heel lmfao n a lot i havent worn in years but i still technically own them. i rlly b wearing the same 4 pairs in a cycle n 1 rotten bleach stained soggy mess for work shoes.
whalien 52: weirdest thing that has ever happened to you? alternatively, weirdest dream you’ve ever had?
weirdest dream i ever had was way too long to type out n had way too many references to people in my personal life to ever be interesting lmao
house of cards: when was the last time you felt sexy?
HAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAAHHAAH?????????????????
boy meets evil: have you ever committed a crime? if so, what was it? alternatively, what is the worst thing you have ever done?
does speeding count smh.
blood, sweat, & tears: kinkiest kink you have?
rolling eyes emoji. pass!
begin: who are you most grateful for in your life?
my parents!
lie: biggest fear?
real talk? failure. abandonment but i’m adopted, how cliche. also bugs
stigma: would you rather know the date of your death or the cause of your death?
date of death bc if i knew the cause but not have any indication of when it’d hit me, i’d be a paranoid agoraphobic wreck for the rest of my life
first love: do you believe in soulmates?
yes but i also believe you can have more than one! and that soulmates aren’t exclusively romantic
reflection: if you could tell your past self one thing, what would it be?
get ur fucking bangs cut
mama: are you good at giving advice?
yeah i think so
awake: if you had to be a flower, which flower would you be?
lazy daisy
lost: how good are you with directions? do you get lost easily?
horrible horrible horrible. directionally challenged. i can’t even find my way to the fucking grocery store down the road on my own. if i ever missed an exit on the highway you’d never hear from me again, i could never find my way back without a gps. i’m dead serious
cypher pt. 4: what do you do to treat yourself or relax?
take a bath or a long long shower. eat smthn warm, drink tea, do a face mask, change my sheets n snuggle up watchin a drama or movie or playin sims
am i wrong: you wake up one morning in the hospital, knowing only your name and a single memory from your life. what is that memory?
wtf how do i answer this lmfao how wud i know lol
21st century girls: do you prefer texting, calling, or video chatting?
texting! calling if it’s a long story though
2!3!: your favorite thing about bangtan?
their modesty and grace ! they’re a true underdog success story >
spring day: who do you miss right now?
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
not today: what are your procrastinating right now?
math summer work smh
wings: on airplanes, do you prefer the window seat, the middle seat, or the aisle seat?
window seat!
you never walk alone: how many people do you trust with your life?
4?
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