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lokisprettygirl · 9 months

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Brokenhearted (Daemon Targaryen x Female Reader) (Non Canon Modern AU) (18+)

Read Chapter 4 here // Series Masterlist

Chapter 5

Summary: As your relationship with Daemon develops you find a secret from his past. Daemon is haunted by a realisation.

Warning: 18+, Smut, sex, degradation kink, pain kink if you squint, consensual sexual choking, Reader has a personality, flashbacks of abusive relationship, sexual abuse, Daemon is a big time smoker so if it’s something triggering don’t read it, he’s not the best boyfriend, alcohol drinking, mention of past trauma and therapy, cigarette smoking, possessive behaviour, some violence, baby needs therapy, baby is trying

It's been a month since Daemon had turned up at your door and asked you to take him back, you were more than eager, it was not about just sex anymore.

You had already begun to care for him even before the breakup but ever since you two had decided to make this relationship healthier you have only fallen in love him more and more everyday, he didn't know that though, you haven't confessed yet, he was still fragile in the emotional sense so you didn't want to push him away with such a declaration of love.

He was trying to be gentler with you, his behavior was changing slowly and just something about a guy doing that for you made you feel special in a way.

He hadn't changed for other people though, just you, he was still the arrogant Daemon you had met the first night but in the privacy of your bedroom he was opening himself up to you, last night he allowed you to caress his head while he rested with his head on your lap on the couch while you two watched a movie, it felt cathartic to have a man like him crumble around you this way. He deserved to feel loved and cared for even though he detested it.

That night after you had affirmed that you wanted him and him only he was completely honest with you, he clarified that he wasn't ready to go all in just yet, he cared about you and felt something deep but he wasn't ready to accept it.

He warned you that he won't be the best man for you because he knew how his mood soured so quickly whenever he was confronted with a situation that reminded him of his past, you still didn't know what had happened to him but you knew it had something to do with a lover.

You were cleaning around the kitchen when you heard your doorbell buzzing so you quickly got him in, he hugged you and then kissed you before he put his hand inside the pocket of his oversized hoodie and took out a tiffany box.

In last one month he had gifted you a coffee machine, a brand new blender which he figured out somehow that you had saved in your wishlist, a few pieces of expensive jewelry you didn't need and now whatever this was,

"What is it?" You chuckled so he smiled,

"Don't worry I'm not asking you to marry me" he joked, that was another fear he had, one of the reasons he didn't want to get involved in a serious relationship was because he didn't want to get married or have kids. You weren't sure what you wanted yet so you really didn't think much of it, for now you just wanted to be with him and he made you happier than you have ever been with a man.

He opened the box and you saw an elegant diamond studded locket in there, it had his initials on the pendant.

"You don't have to wear it if you don't wish to but I got it made extra lightweight so you won't even feel it" he really loved spending his money on you for some reason, he put the chain around your neck and he wasn't wrong, the locket barely had any weight on it.

"Mmmm are you trying to own me ..with your name tag and everything?" you mumbled against his mouth before you kissed him, he couldn't help but smile.

"I already own you silly girl" as soon as he used that voice on you, you were a putty in his hands, you took his hoodie off his body and he wasn't wearing anything underneath it, he picked you up in his arms and took you to the bedroom.

Unlike before Daemon had started to stay the nights here with you and in your sleep you did break the condition he had regarding cuddling but he didn't really mind that. He actually allowed himself to enjoy the warmth of your body.

He laid you down on the bed and stared at you, the initials engraved on the pendant were glittering in the low light of your bedroom.

"Take your clothes off darling, the chain stays" he said firmly so you undressed slowly while you kept your eyes on him and teased him "Mmm good girl..want to fuck you just like that" he gripped your chin and leaned down to kiss you before he pulled away. You got up on your knees and unbuttoned his pants, he had such a pretty cock, so thick in girth and the perfect size, he kept his icy blonde bushes trimmed, the carpet matched the drapes. He had never allowed you to touch him, caress him or suck him before but he was slowly getting rid of that fear of his especially when he noticed your eagerness to please him. He just didn't want to lose all control the way he had done with her.

That's what made him so useless.

He moaned as you grabbed his length in your fist and gave him a stroke, your lips trailed down from his sternum to his abs,

"Is this okay?" You whispered softly and he cupped your cheeks to kiss you.

"Mmmm" he hummed in response as you kissed down from his earlobe to his neck and your lips trailed over the scar on his shoulder blades, his face scrunched in a mixture of pleasure and fright at the same time, he grabbed the back of your neck and laid you down on the bed as he got on top of you,

"That's it darling…I need a moment" he told you softly so you nodded.

"You're okay i promise, you're safe" he gulped as you said that but he didn't step away, he placed his head between your neck and tried to calm his wrecked nerves. You continued to caress his hair and just a minute later he was hard and ready to go again , sometimes he would put a condom on when he fucked you but the other times he just fucked you raw like this, he always enquired if you were talking your pills and you always wondered why he was so diligent about it. Maybe he feared that you'd get pregnant or something.

He got on his knees and pushed his cock inside you, his hand wrapped around your throat as he moved his cock in and out of you slowly.

Nothing about your sex life had changed, it was only becoming more intense and satisfying with every night you spent with him.

He pulled out of you and flipped you around on your front, you gasped as he spanked your cheeks harshly then he brushed your hair aside and his fingers curled around the chain, he thrusted in again at the same time as he pulled your head up using the hold on the chain, there was a sweet pressure around your throat when he pulled on it, you moaned as he leaned down and kissed the side of your neck,

He placed his other arm on the mattress for the support as he increased the pace of his thrusts.

"Tell me that you're mine" he whispered in your ears, his voice was husky and breathy in your ears.

"I'm yours baby I'm yours"

"Tell me that I own this pretty little cunt of yours" he asked again,

"You own my body..you own my cunt..oh god you own me i swear" a loud moan escaped your throat as his cock hit that sweet spot inside you.

"Such an obedient slut..so perfect" he mumbled at the same time as your walls clenched around him and both of you hit the peak of this euphoria together. His cock twitched inside you as you continued to milk his cock and his warm cum filled you to the brim.

You placed your hand around his cheek as you turned your head and he placed his forehead on yours as you both tried to come down from your respective highs.

As his cock went limp he pulled out of you and turned you around on your back.

"I need a cigarette" he whispered softly so you nodded, it's not that you didn't enjoy aftercare after the sex but he wasn't the type of man to give you that and you wanted to respect his boundaries, he was already doing a few things you never thought he would so you wanted to give him time.

He was going to get off you but then he placed his hand on your cheek and stared at you for a moment, a smile formed on his lips.

"You're beautiful, you know that right?" You smiled as he said that. He was doing his best.

"Come here". He murmured as he leaned down and kissed you a few times as tenderly as he could before he finally got up. He never wanted you to feel used even though deep down he knew his actions must have indicated otherwise especially after sex but he wasn't ready to go all sappy for you. He went to the bathroom and when he came back..you got up to clean yourself, when you returned he was in the bed lighting up the cigarette, you knew you had to intervene about this habit at some point as well but now wasn't the time.

"Want me to go to the other room?" He asked you as you got in the bed so you kissed his cheek,

"Stay mister cheese burger" he smiled as you said that. You laid your head down on his shoulder and watched his chest heaving, his heart was still beating so fast.

"Shit I need my ashtray" he cursed under his breath and was about to get up but you put your palm under the cigarette and collected the falling ashes before they could fall on him or the bed. He looked at you intensely as he took another drag and rubbed the ashes on your palm with his fingers hoping it didn't hurt but then next time he promptly dipped the ashes on your palm and you sucked a breath as you felt the warmth of it.

"Kinky" he mumbled as he continued to look at you and it made you smile.

"I'm just used to burning my hands..I don't even feel this"

"Is that so?" he mumbled as he took the last hit from the cigarette while his hypnotic gaze never left your eyes, you suddenly got on his lap and he looked up at you as you sat down on his thighs while you kissed him.

"I have to put this out" he murmured against your mouth and you lifted yourself up until you had your breasts squished against his face,

"Do it" you mumbled as you grabbed his hand and brought it closer to your soft curves, he looked at you intensely, trying to figure out if you were joking or not but the look in your eyes was dark, maybe you were just horny at the moment and feeling bold.

"I'm not going to burn you, you silly girl" he resisted, he didn't want to hurt you like that. He never wanted to put his fingers on you or scar your skin. Especially when he knew how that felt.

"It's okay just once…let me feel it once" he glared at you as you grabbed his hand and he looked at the burning end of the cigarette before he gave into your request, you were asking for it afterall.

He quickly put the cigarette out on the swollen curve of your breasts in one quick motion and you winced because of the burn you felt, but then a moan escaped your mouth and he threw the cigarette away before he kissed you and quickly laid you down under him, his mouth trailed down and he latched his lips around the burned skin before licked it over and over again like a kitten,

"Don't make me do it again you hear me?" He glared at you, his eyes were teary so you nodded, you didn't want to trigger something, you didn't know what had gotten into you suddenly. You just wanted to feel it once and as much as you enjoyed the momentarily rush you knew it was going to hurt later.

"Yeah…I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry" you whispered softly so he cupped your cheeks and kissed you again before he rolled over and laid on his side, "Are you okay? I'm sorry" you whispered as you propped on your elbow. He looked at the mark and caressed it with his fingers.

"It's alright, it's not you i promise" you ran your fingers through his hair gently so he looked at you "Does it hurt?"

"It stings.. just a little"

"Why did you ask me to do that?"

"It was sexy"

"Hurting each other in bed is not sexy darling" he said sternly

"Mmmhmmm then why do you choke me?" You asked sheepishly

"It brings you pleasure, i see the look of pure ecstacy on your face when I do it"

"Well, this brought me pleasure too , you didn't hurt me, you gave me what I asked you to give me" he looked at you again as you said that "That being said..you don't have to do anything you don't want to do in bed, you could just say no and I'll never bring it up, it needs to be like that for both of us…it goes both ways, the safe word is not just for me.. okay?" You said softly and he gulped as the wheels in his head started to turn, he had horrible flashbacks of his time with her and how much she had abused his consent in bed, he just wanted to make her happy and keep her pleased while she continued to remind him of his role as a man in the relationship.

"I can say no and you'd listen to me?" He asked, his voice trembled as he spoke,

"Of Course i would, you're my boyfriend, I care about you and I would never want to do anything that will hurt you" you mumbled as you caressed his cheek.

"Thank you" he turned on his side towards you and you laid down on the pillow as well, you didn't want to overwhelm him so you kept your distance and didn't try to snuggle him, he was trying to open up slowly and you didn't want to hinder his progress.

You knew his trauma wasn't from his childhood because he had a good one, he grew up in London, he and his brother Viserys came to the USA when he was 18 and Viserys had just begun his UFC career, he only retired a few years ago.

Young Daemon looked up to his older brother and wanted to be in the professional ring someday just like Viserys, he even fulfilled that dream of his but something had happened to him later on in life that had ruined everything for him. His issues with intimacy and the scars on his body were enough of an indication that he was in an extremely debilitating and toxic abusive relationship with someone. You had tried to look him up and found an old picture of him from his first official league, he has won that match and he seemed so happy, it was the kind of happiness that seemed genuine, his smile reached his eyes in those pictures, you saw a woman clinging onto him in one of the pictures but you didn't find any further information about her or who she was.

You didn't want to be nosey, you knew he'd tell you if he wanted that information to be shared with you so for now you just wanted to be patient.

Next day you were at an event Daemon had taken you to with him, it was to celebrate the players that had been chosen for the next season and almost all the guys Daemon and Viserys trained under them had qualified. Casey Anderson made it too and that means you had to come face to face with Randall again. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes when you saw him, Daemon was busy with other people so you tried to avoid Randall but like a hawk he spotted you anyway.

"And we meet again" he walked towards you and you took a deep breath, your eyes met with Daemon from across the room so you assured him that you were fine, you didn't want him to lose his cool, especially today at such an event.

"Randall, congratulations" you said to him so he smiled.

"I see ..you're still dating that maniac huh? Makes sense..he's filthy rich" He chuckled but you noticed the venom dripping from his voice,

"He's not a maniac and I'd advise you to keep your mouth shut you fucking creep unless you want to lose a few more teeths" he glared at you as you said that. Funny how some men always got so frustrated when you treated them the way they treated you.

"I see huh ..a match made in heaven, gold digger and the woman abuser" he walked away after insulting you and you resisted the urge to turn around and give it back to him.

You understood why he called you a gold digger but why did he insult Daemon like that? What was he insinuating?

When all the players were on the stage you walked towards your boyfriend and you could see that he seemed lost in his head.

Daemon couldn't help but reminisce about the time he used to be one of these guys, Viserys always told him that it still wasn't too late, that he could still revive his career if he wanted to, he was far too skilled of a fighter to work behind the scenes but Daemon didn't think he was capable of doing it anymore. Everytime he was in the ring with people around him he only saw her face in the crowd and he remembered that last day he was in the ring, he knew he'd never get over that day.

As you linked your fingers with his he turned his head and focused his attention on you instead, he had seen that bastard Randall talking to you before so he was a bit concerned.

"Did he bother you?" He asked you so you shook your head.

"He's just a pathetic little man with a big ego"

"Are you describing me?" He joked but you glared at him

"You're not a pathetic little man"

He kissed your cheek quickly, he wasn't keen on doing any sort of PDA, that wasn't his style and you didn't mind that either but he needed to show you that he appreciated you because he really did appreciate you more than you could imagine and more than he was capable of showing you.

"Thanks for coming with me tonight" he mumbled softly so you smiled and squeezed his hand, his brother was looking at you from the other side of the room so you gave him a smile as well.

He was taking you back to his place after dinner and he saw you were a bit too quiet which wasn't like you at all so he tucked your hair behind your ear to get your attention. The action did make your heart flutter.

"Something wrong?"

"No ..just ..it's just Randall..he said something about you and it's bothering me, not because I believe him but because I know you're not like that I mean i know you..he shouldn't walk around saying stuff like that about you" you rambled on so he looked at you curiously,

"What did he say?"

"He called you a woman abuser" his jaw clenched as you said that.

"Did you believe him?"

"Of course not, that's not why I'm upset baby"

"Well you should be..he wasn't wrong.. he shouldn't know that though.. nobody is supposed to know about that" he mumbled under his breath so you looked at him,

"What do you mean?"

"Well i have done things you most certainly would not approve of" you looked at him confused as he admitted that Randall was right about him.

"You have hurt a woman?" He took a deep breath before he answered,

"Yeahhh..I put hands on a .. girlfriend of mine..hit her so badly that she was in the hospital for a month" he said nonchalantly as if it was something so ordinary for him. As he pulled into the driveway of his building complex he finally looked at you, there was a horrified look on your face,

"Are you scared of me now?" He asked you as he took your seat belt off and guided you to sit on his lap, you slowly crawled on top of him and he kissed you briefly.

"I'd never hurt you" he mumbled so you caressed his cheek with your fingers.

"Why did you do that?"

You asked him because you wanted to find the reason, you knew he had a short temper but he had never hurt you like that and you knew in your heart that he wasn't capable of doing something like that.

"You didn't answer my question..are you scared of me?"

He asked you again, this time his voice was more firm so you shook your head and kissed him lovingly to show him that you weren't afraid of him.

"I'm not scared of you, I'm just trying to understand you..there must be a reason, something that you're not telling me" you whispered softly, you didn't want to make your judgement on half information.

"I did it, reason or not, I did it and as a man I shouldn't have done it" his eyes teared up so you kissed his forehead. He wasn't a cruel man, you didn't want to believe that he'd just hurt someone like that in the fit of anger.

"Was it an act of retaliation? Defense?"

"It doesn't matter–"

"It does to me..I'm not asking you to tell me everything Daemon, it's just a simple question, did you do it because you finally had enough of it?" You asked him again and instead of answering he just nodded before he put his head down on your chest and hugged you tightly. You caressed his head to comfort him and none of you said a word for a while but then you spoke,

"It's okay…it's okay..i promise.. you did nothing wrong"

"I don't want you to think of me differently "

"I won't..i know you well enough to make my own judgments and I'll be here whenever you want to share more..you were just trying to protect yourself" he nodded as you said that. He had gotten really lucky in life when he had found you, the secrets he had kept from you were slowly starting to unravel but the way you looked at him made him believe that you won't put him down once you learn more about him. A part of him believed that you'd be his savior, that you'd hold his hand and pull him out of this hell he had trapped himself in.

He had given up on living, he was merely existing before you came into his life but now there was a hope again.

"I fear you'd pity me once you will learn everything about me" you chuckled as he said that but your eyes were teary and the look on your face was of pure admiration..

"Pity you? I could never pity the man that saved my life, you have been my only hero since that night in the alley.. I could never pity a man like you. You're so strong and no matter what you tell me, your past would never make me feel pity for you"

You told him your honest feelings and he just looked at you like you were his own personal angel sent from heaven, just for him.

It was in that exact moment he had realized that he was feeling something he had vowed to never feel. He was slowly falling in love again and he was terrified of that realization.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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@simbaaas-stuff @ajthefujoshi @witchybitch2

#daemon targaryen x female reader #daemon targaryen x reader angst #daemon targaryen x reader fluff #daemon targaryen x reader #daemon targaryen x reader smut #non canon #modern au

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