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all-hallows-evie · 3 years

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Unlucky Stars

- For @prettyboyskywalker's 500 follower challenge!!!!

A/N: Ok, posting this bad boy now cuz if I don't I'm just going to keep editing it and then I will ruin the WHOLE thing! lol

Anyway! HAPPY 500th FOLLOWER CATY!!! AHHHHHH!!!! You are such a light in my life and you DESERVE MORE FOLLOWERS!! lol

Word count: ~4200, I don't know how to write drabbles apparently IM SORRY

Warnings: Teen Rating, FemaleOC (because if anyone is going to be mean to Din it's gonna be ME, not you guys, so yeah, leave all the mean feels for me), Hurt feels EVERYWHERE, drinking, brief mention of sex but no one's actually f**king lol, canon swears, writer does not like Bo Katan, and just GENERAL BAD DECISIONS. Also not beta'd because we die like men here lol

****

It never gets old.

Watching the double suns of Tatooine dip behind the dunes, the way the sky turns the color of wildfire before it’s engulfed by a sea of blues, violets and the soft darkness that follows.

She makes it a point to climb up to the tallest parapet of Boba’s palace every evening just to watch the colors change.

With every second that passes she feels the chill of the oncoming night settle against her exposed skin. The warmth her flight suit usually provides is sorely missed, but no, tonight she traded it all in because she felt like she owed Boba something.

Her flightsuit, her armor, her helmet.

All gone.

She was against wearing the dress from the start, it feels foreign against her body but Boba insists, in that quiet and menacing way he has. Her entire back is exposed to the night sky in the flowing ruffles of the same color green as Boba’s armor.

The front held around her neck with a circlet of gold that presses against her throat. Her hair down and loose across her shoulders. Every once in a while the wind catches a few strands and softly brushes them across her face as it stirs the hem of the dress.

It’s not just the warmth she suddenly misses, she also misses the anonymity of her armor. While she is in it, she is just another Mandalorian stalking around Boba's place. But this...this made her stand out.

She hears him approach before she sees him, those long strides, the quiet swish of the grey cloak around his shoulders as it sweeps the sand with every step. Her hands tense, curling around the stone balustrade of the balcony as he gets closer.

Does he even realize it's her?

Sometimes she isn't sure if Din Djarin, Mand'alor and her last travel companion even realized that she is a woman.

It's how it should be Nicyra, her mind chides. You are a Mandalorian, there is no such line between male and female, you just are Mandalorian.

He stands beside her, still in full armor even after everything that’s happened. His gaze trained somewhere off in the distance.

She wants him to look first. She wants him to acknowledge her, but when the silence goes on for what feels like an eternity she finally breaks away. She turns from him as she leaves the balcony, "Good talk, Djarin."

She is gone before he's finally able to stutter out a response, "You look...you are beautiful." He grinds his knuckle into the banister, the plates on his hands scraping against the sandstone. Frustrated and annoyed. He had faced down krayt dragons with less fear in his belly, but saying anything to her while the suns paint her skin in hues of golden fire...it terrifies him.

The suns set behind him pulling the velvet black of night against the dunes bringing with them memories of when this mess first started. When Nicyra of Clan Kote first crept into his life.

He had seen the way her lips had pressed into a tight line when Bo Katan called his covert a cult. The small flames of dissent starting to smolder behind her eyes, Kryze unknowingly adding kindling with every cheap shot in his direction. She had been quiet, letting Bo Katan and Koska Reeves do most of the posturing, but every time she looked at him her gaze grew brighter, mischievous and almost friendly as they barreled through the ship on Kyrze's whim. She fell into line beside him, fighting with him not just beside him as they took control from the imperial remnant.

"Take the foundling to the city of Calodan on the forest planet of Corvus. There you will find Ahsoka Tano. Tell her you were sent by-"

"I'll take him." She broke ranks without a blink, a look of annoyance crossed Bo Katan's face as she turned to look in her direction, "I'm done Kryze, I can't see this through with you anymore."

Koska Reeves had practically laughed but thought better of it as Bo Katan grew pale with anger.

They had turned to leave the Nite Owls behind when Bo Katan snatched his arm, she pulled him close to growl in his ear, "Hear me now zealot, she is a daughter of Concord Dawn, born and bred Mandalorian, she's not part of some indigent clan but a house with standing and power. You will never be worthy of her."

Boba could see the snarl on her lips from across the room. He would chuckle if he wasn’t fed up with the both of them. They were beyond his help at this point. "What did he say princess?"

"I'm putting my armor back on."

"He didn't like it?"

"Who gives two kriffs about either of you, I despise this." She grits her teeth as her disappointment threatens to seal her throat, she hiccups as she struggles for breath. Her mind can only scream as the stupid girl who has invaded her mind, she was ruining everything. She was ruining her.

"Sweet girl-"

"Save your 'sweet girls' for your pets Boba," She tries to growl but it comes out choked instead, "They can have this trash as well." She slams her door behind her, ripping off the gown as fast as her shaking fingers can manage before wrapping herself back in the familiar coarseness of her flight suit. She forces her sadness to simmer into anger and she hopes, as she reattaches her beskar plates, that soon that anger will shrink down into something smaller that she can swallow and forget it ever existed. She's got her hair tied back and her breathing almost back to normal when there's a knock on her door. "I'm not in the mood Fett."

"Not Fett." His low tone further twists the knife in her belly.

"Even less in the mood for you." She mutters as she snatches her helmet from her bed and clips it to her belt. She takes one final look to make sure her door is locked before she crawls out of the window and climbs up the tiny decorative edge on the side of the palace. She slides on to the balcony of one of the rooms above her, where Boba keeps his pets.

The palace is crawling with them, new ones appear every other day from every corner of the sandy wasteland. The room is warm as she walks in from the darkness. Half dressed humanoids and aliens of every possible combination of genders are spread out all over the floor covered in soft pillows and blankets, the smell of sex and alcohol heady as she walks through.

She mostly goes unnoticed as the pets play drinking games amongst themselves, only stopped as one of the twi'leks approaches her with a glass filled to the brim with a bright orange red drink.

"What's this?" She asks, she pushes it away as the unfamiliar sting of the unknown alcohol reaches her nose.

"Boga noga." The twi’lek replies with a grin.

"He's got you drinking what?!" She snickers.

"No, Boba refuses to drink it, says it's Hutt swill."

"He's not wrong." She replies but hazards a drink anyway. She tosses a mouthful of the liquid in the glass back, the drink hits her throat like a mixture of jet fuel and animal piss, she gags as she swallows. "Osi'kyr!" She coughs as it hits her belly like acid from a sarlacc pit. The twi'leks giggle but her grip around the glass doesn't waver. They offer to take it from her, but she pulls it away.

"No no, it's mine now." She smirks as she continues to make her way through the room. The home brewed booze hits her bloodstream quicker than she wants to admit. She catches herself before she stumbles when her boots tangle with the blankets on the floor and she almost falls out the door, a complete drunken mess if not for the two girls who catch her and help her out the front door as she throws back the last of the drink.

They lean her up against the stairs overlooking a back hall towards the throne room. The usually bustling hall is empty...except for him. He's given up on knocking at her door, typical she rolls her eyes, and now he's standing there, waiting for something or someone. She leans her face against her palm and before she can pull herself from her drunken haze long enough to think twice the heavy bottomed glass is already slipping from her fingers and sailing across the room right at his back. It bounces off the tucked folds of his cape with a heavy thunk before it hits the ground behind him and shatters into a starburst pattern on the floor.

He turns and meets her stunned expression.

"I must be drunk because I was aiming for your head."

"Vod…"

The word makes her stomach churn even worse, "Vod." she hums back.

"Haryc b'aalyc?" Drunk? His voice heavy with concern.

She turns her back to him as the world starts to spin, her back presses into the railing. She closes her eyes and hopes it helps keep the ill feelings at bay, "Haryc, hokan'yc." Tired, defeated. She murmurs as she slides down the side until she is seated on the ground.

"Vod?" His voice is coming closer, she can hear the scrape from the sole of his boots on the stairs.

She has to go.

She scrambles to her feet, clawing at the door in front of her until she is standing. Stupid Hutt swill, she groans in her own mind as the world continues to spin sickly all around her making every step more difficult than it'd ever been. Never again! She swears. He's so close and if he comes any closer she is sure she will make an even bigger fool of herself. She says a quick prayer to whatever gods watch the idiots and the drunks, and pushes off of the door as she leaps backwards, flipping over the bannister and down to the floor beneath her. His hand reaches out as she leaps away, his fingers curling over the edge of her helmet.

She feels him try to pull her back, they both let go of her helmet at the same time.

It clatters to the floor, the cheek of the helmet crumpled and the viewscreen shatters on impact. The glass of her helmet mixes with the glass from her drink.

She lands beside it, her ankle wobbling awkwardly to one side, pain shoots up her leg from the botched landing but the broken helmet in front of her hurts more. In the broken reflection of what’s left of her T-bar she sees her family more than she sees herself.

The helmet had been through hell and back, surviving things it probably shouldn’t have…but it couldn’t survive her.

"Not enough that you defile your armor, but you've got to destroy mine as well." It slips from her lips and she instantly regrets it. Anger, and shame build up in her chest and she doesn't even dare to look back up at him for fear of what she might say next.

She leaves her helmet where it has fallen and walks away as fast as her wounded leg will let her, grateful when he doesn't try to follow.

The next morning, he was gone, only her aching ankle and horrible hangover as proof that she had ruined whatever good thing she may have had.

***

Months go by while she finds a weird space for herself amongst Boba's recruits, she almost convinces herself that she is happy.

When she least expects it, his shadow darkens the hall.

He is different. It is obvious with every step he takes towards the throne where Boba sits. A thick fur cloak wraps tight around his shoulders, it adds another several inches to his already imposing figure. His helmet off, dark hair longer than she recalled as the tips stir the fur around his collar. The dark saber is slung across his hip so casually that she would have grinned if it wasn't for the large hand wrapped tightly into the much smaller grasp of the girl beside him.

She tries to not let it shock her, even though she feels her knees try to buckle.

The girl is beautiful, with long hair that drapes down her back in delicate rings and huge innocent eyes that look to Din like he was her beginning and end. She was all soft curves exactly where they should be, not a single scar to be seen.

"Mand'alor!" Boba calls to him as he enters the throne room, Din pulls his little party closer.

Their eyes meet, her dark lashes flutter at Nicyra's blank T-bar stare. After a few moments the girl pulls at Din excitedly, it takes everything for Nicyra to not be rude and leave then and there.

Boba approaches the man, they wrap their hands around each other's arm in greeting, "Djarin, what brings you all the way to Tatooine?"

His voice is low, but even from across the room she can hear every word, "I've taken a wife and as ruler of Tatooine and as my ally, I wanted to present her to you."

Boba looks down at the girl who is pressing closer to the Mandalor's side.

A name is murmured between the two men, but she doesn't hear it, her ears full of buzzing as her world comes crashing down a second time. Boba turns slightly, his gaze coming to rest on the Mandalorian standing stock still beside his throne, he calls to her, bringing her back to attention. Against her better judgment she approaches.

The girl's eyes grow wider with every step she takes, as she gets closer Nicyra's fingers slip under her helmet, fingers steady as she releases the pressure lock and pulls it off of her head.

"Mand'alor." her voice is steady, thank the gods. she stands beside Boba, drawing from his strength even as her stomach does flips.

"Vod...still here." His smile is warm.

"She hasn't tired of me yet." Boba chuckles, "She keeps the others in line while Fennec is away."

The girl beside him sneaks little looks at her armor, every once in a while daring to sneak peeks at her face. The fresh scar across Nicyra’s chin burns like new as every inch of her is scrutinized but it's not a mean gaze, if anything it’s curious, hungry for more information.

"She hasn't seen her kind in beskar Djarin, I take it the Nite Owls have been keeping their distance?"

"The maker has been kind, in that regard."

Nicyra nods, "For the best. Kryze is less than kind to the ones she does like." She stops herself there, the next words that want to come are short, and mean, meant to wound the little princess on his arm. She doesn't need to say it for the two men in the room to know where she was going.

Kryze could tear the world asunder for this little one with barely a blink.

"Did Fennec happen to say where she would be this morning?" Boba turns her attention back to him.

"Armory." Nicyra replies, "Still trying to bring order to the chaos the hutts kept in there."

"I'm sure she'd like to know the Mand’alor is here." He says.

She is about to say something but the glint of his eyes tells her to go, he's giving her an out. The pain in her chest must be more visible than she had thought, so instead she turns and leaves, ducking into the darkened stairs of the cellars.

"So much commotion up there."

"Djarin is here " She replies to the voice in the shadows.

"Not alone by the sounds of it."

"No," she looks anywhere but at the dark gaze of Fennec Shand, "He's brought a pretty girl with him. Kaysh riduur."

" A wife?!"

"Apparently."

Fennec rolls her eyes at her, she doesn't have to see her face to feel the judgmental daggers that Shand is flinging at her back, "You brought this on yourself."

"I think he's proven the type of companion he prefers. Look her in that pretty face and tell me I would make him happy."

Fennec scoffs and leaves her behind to mope.

She thinks about missing it for once.

The way the colors change as darkness takes over Tatooine. It feels bitter and painful while he is there. She forces herself to go anyway, not sure why her bones scream at her to go, to follow the path of the suns until they fade into the horizon. She makes the climb all the way to the topmost parapet, mind blank until she's at the last set of stairs and she sees him already there, helmet at his side as he looks over the quickly darkening horizon.

She turns to go.

"He says you don't miss a single night."

A parade of swears race through her mind, but she doesn't dare breathe them out loud. She remains still, hiding behind her helmet.

"Have you been avoiding me?"

"You've been Mand'alor for too long already Djarin, not everything is about you. I was busy."

He smirks, a quiet chuckle half under his breath, he extends his hand to the space beside him, inviting her over.

She sighs and hopes that it's quiet enough that it won't be caught by her vocoder. She takes the final step and comes to stand beside him, leaving a good gap between them. They watch the colors change around them in silence.

"I was worried you hated me."

She says nothing, mind blank except for the few prayers to the manda: please don't let this be happening right now.

"I think I loved you and that... terrified me."

"I terrified you?" It was worse than she thought, she’s frozen to the spot only able to turn her head to look in his direction.

"I was a broken man, everything was gone. My creed, my foundling...I couldn't…" Daughter of Concord Dawn, born and bred Mandalorian, not part of a clan but born into a house with standing and power... it floats through his mind once again. "-I didn't deserve you."

She is grateful for the foresight to not remove her helmet as tears cloud her vision, they threaten to spill at any moment's notice.

"You were strong, where I failed. I didn't deserve you, I didn't deserve the beskar on my back-" His fingers trace the jagged slash to one side of her helmet where she had repaired it, the only reminder of the last time he was here.

His touch brings the world rushing back, "But your heart is mended now?" she interrupts as she steps back. She tries to keep the shakes in her voice low enough to be blocked out by the vocoder. "She has healed you, your riduur?"

He is silent for a few moments, his eyes scanning her helmet for even a shred of humanity, "Yes." He whispers.

"Good." she replies, her throat grows tight, suddenly unsure if she can get the words out. The words that would free him and destroy her. Only one broken heart left, and it's better that it be her own than that of his new companion. "I never loved you Din Djarin, so go, be with your riduur, raise your warriors as your creed commands."

Kyrze always had a way of knowing, so it is no surprise when she wanders back to her room that there is an incoming comm from the Nite Owl.

"Is it true?" Even in tiny hologram form the disgust on Bo Katan's face reads clear and just as sharp as her tone

"Is what true?"

"Is he there with the little one, his little queen?"

Nicyra huffs, "What is it that you want Kryze?"

"Just answer the question."

"Yes, they are here."

"Then you know why I'm reaching out to you. They cannot hold Mandalore, that foundling and his -"

"You're exhausting, do you know that?"

Bo Katan sighs, it's strange and overly dramatic even for her, "What would your family say if they saw you under the heel of Fett? At the beck and call of a clone-"

"Okay, we are done here."

"We promised your family we would keep you safe. You've had your fun, it's time to come home. You don't belong there."

She considers it for a moment, if only to get away from these walls that are currently filled with awful memories. That second of doubt is all it takes for Bo Katan to pounce.

"Nicyra…"

"A soldier for Fett, a soldier for you. I see no difference."

"You made me an oath-"

"And you would have me destroy an innocent man to meet that oath Kryze, he was just trying to help the kid. You would have dragged him into a war that was not his!"

Bo Katan falls silent, her lips pressing into a tight line. "Come home, or I will collect your beskar along with any more I happen to find along the way." She wasn't asking anymore.

"You don't have the manpower-"

"No…" Bo Katan smirks as the image on the hologram grows wider and rows upon rows of dark troopers stand behind her, eyes glowing red, "Not men. You have two hours before we break atmo. Say your goodbyes."

Nicyra screams in frustration, throwing the comlink against the wall, shattering the case. The blue glowing figures fade into nothing.

Her hands shake as she grabs on to her helmet hoping to steady them as she bolts towards the meeting hall where Fett was holding a small banquet for the Mand'alor. She makes her way straight to the older man, she tries to keep her face stoic so no one suspects how hard her heart pounds against her chest.

She stands beside him, "Boba."

Boba turns towards her, his gaze followed by Din and the girl.

She leans in close, using her back to block the view from the other two as she whispers into his ear, "Bo Katan is two hours away, she's reprogrammed the kriffing death troopers." Maker her voice wouldn't stop shaking, her hands fighting to follow, "If I go, the Mand’alor needs never know."

"What does she want?" He murmurs back.

She shakes her head, "Other than me, I don't know Boba. We're no match for them, I have to go."

He stands from his seat and pulls her a little further away from the table, "And if she's lying? If she unleashes them anyway?" He keeps his voice low enough to be muddled by the other sounds going on around them.

"What choice do I have, Boba?"

His eyes soften, "Your freedom girl-"

"It was fun while it lasted." Her voice trembles.

The older man takes her by the chin and presses his forehead to hers, her eyes close tightly at the touch, her lashes soaked in unfallen tears before she pulls away and leaves the room just as quickly as she came in.

It's not lost on Din who stands to follow, but Boba's hand stops him, "I'm sending her on a short job Djarin, she'll be back before you and I know it." He clears his throat before slipping back into his seat and continuing their earlier discussion as if nothing had happened.

She runs as far as her legs will take her, not trusting herself to pilot her jetpack with her entire body shaking in this new mix of anger and fear. The palace is a small glowing spot on the horizon before she activates her homing beacon, sending her coordinates to the usual channel for the Nite Owls.

The only sound around her is sand rushing down the dunes and her harsh breathing as she waits.

And waits.

And then high above a tiny shimmering star approaches, growing larger as it makes its way through the atmosphere. It lands a few feet from where she stands, landing gear sinking into the soft sand with a muffled thump.

The ramp lowers and two figures descend. Even in the pitch black with only the bright light of the belly of the ship behind them, she knew those shadows as Bo Katan and Koska Reeves. She jogs the last little bit of distance between them, coming to a stop in front of Bo Katan.

Kryze’s eyes rake over her figure like an icy chill, "Let’s hope the stink of this planet washes off of you quickly."

Koska hides a grin, Nicyra just lowers her head and goes to step on the ramp but Bo Katan stops her, hand hitting her hard on the chest. Her fingers run down the spot on her armor where she has scraped off the crest of the Nite Owls, the same one that's slapped on the side of the ship.

"The old ways would see me kill you for this." She tuts.

Nicyra wants to reply, she wants to let her know exactly what the same old ways would do to her tactics, but instead she clenches her jaw and stays silent. Her eyes steady on the ground at her feet.

"We'll have to repaint it, vod."

Koska steps slightly to one side, allowing her to pass. She makes her way up the ship's ramp and into its belly without looking back as the sky turns deep purple all around.

#Prettyboyskywalker’s Big Tropey Challenge #usercaty #clan dinui #clan jate'kara #OC x Din Djarin #OC x mandalorian #the mandalorian #the mandalorian fan fiction #female OC x Din #Evie likes to make Djarin hurt

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katierosefun · 3 years

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creator tag

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

thank you @kckenobi and @pandora15 for the tag!! <3 so here are the works, in no particular order and also oh gee i am so sorry this got so painfully long you can tell i’m procrastinating on my final + also i just tend to run my mouth when im talking about writing asdffd

to these memories (After Darth Sidious is defeated, everything changes. Some for the better, others not so much. Mostly better though. (Or: Anakin becomes a dad. Rex rehabilitates clone troopers who no longer want to be a part of the army. Ahsoka gets a call from an old friend. And maybe Obi-Wan finds out it’s not just his enemies who don’t stay dead. Basically, everyone gets the happy ending they deserve.)

so this was my first major longform tcw fic, and i just. i have a lot of feelings about this fic, mostly nostalgia and lots of gratefulness. first of all, i think i met a lot of super cool people through this fic, and i also? just? idk, this was a major project that i kind of worked on to cope with post-tcw sadness + also just. general sadness about the world’s situation. writing this story was actually super healing for me, mostly because i just. really wanted to have something where happy endings existed.

so this really...was an experience, and i’m so super grateful for everyone who read along. to this day, whenever i get a comment about this fic, i feel super happy because it makes me feel glad to know that there were some people who took comfort in this work, because i really wanted this fic to have that kind of effect on people. :’)

there they are (Right before Ahsoka leaves for Mandalore, Rex distracts Bo-Katan so she could give her family a proper goodbye. (There's hugging. We just needed our trio to hug.)

i think this was one of my first tcw fics of 2020, and. i just remember impulse writing this after watching old friends not forgotten because i was just. so sad that we didn’t get an anakin and ahsoka hug or a trio hug or anything. i understand why they didn’t--like, i really, really do, but. but i think if there’s a theme i’m going through this year, it’s ‘this was sad, so i’m gonna make it happy!!!’, so...as my masterlist puts it, ‘dave filoni said no trio hug, so i said fine, i’ll do it’.

uhhhhh, how very unusual of me, but!!! probably my working on a new original story. i’ve got the fourth draft of another story siting in the background, but. this other story idea came at me, and five outlines later, i started this story. i’m about three chapters down now, but. a snippet of the prologue:

“Well…it’s also a rather important story,” Rosalind said. “Do you enjoy stories?”

“I want to be a writer,” I blurted, and I stopped at that. I fiddled with my mug, heat that had nothing to do with the hot chocolate or the fire rushing to my face. Silly, oversharing me—oh, what a young, lonely child I was back then. So desperate for conversation that I had grown out of practice and resorted to sharing details that the average stranger would not care for.

But then again, these were not the average strangers—although I’m sure you’ve figured that for yourself.

“Yes,” I said meekly. “I enjoy stories.”

“Well,” Dae said after some time, “it’s good that you’re a writer.”

I lifted my head, and this time, I saw Dae and Rosalind smile at each other. A softer smile, one that made me feel suddenly dreadfully, dreadfully lonely.

“You might want to write this down,” Rosalind said at last.

And so I did.

*and cue the actual story* i won’t say too much because adsfsdfsfd talking about my original work makes me feel awkward + also i am constantly in fear of people stealing ideas even though,,,even though i know the only person who can write this story is me, anyways, but uh. i will say that i have a plan for a five-part series that’s basically about a witch and a princess. there’s a prophecy in the background. there’s magic. there’s rivals to friends to enemies to lovers. there’s father figures + big sister figures + found family + ancient kingdoms + the real world blending with the fantasy world + uh i’ve said enough okeee bye that’s it

the moment was enough (The war ends. Ahsoka and Obi-Wan try to work things out since the last time they actually saw each other.)

it had been a long while since i had written anything that was really just about ahsoka and obi-wan, but. i think everyone knows that i really love my grandpadawan and grandmaster duo? idk, this fic really made me feel things because i was thinking a lot about how obi-wan and ahsoka had left things. i wanted to make it pretty clear that they both clearly care about each other a lot, but like. also. there’s still some hurt there. i just had so much fun writing this, because obi-wan and ahsoka are such an underrated duo and i love them :’)

loose stitches (The discovery and aftermath of Maul. Anakin and Ahsoka find themselves pacing in front of the Council chambers multiple times. They might have taken Obi-Wan to Dex’s. Something might have unraveled, only to be stitched back together.)

kasey before you say anything pls know that i would talk about this fic until literally the day i die i am sorry if i am making you feel self-conscious--but anyways this was a collab with the ever-talented, ever-wonderful @kckenobi. so uh, quick story which mayhaps i might not have told anyone before, but whatever, i’m listening to evermore and therefore have no choice but to be emotional huh--this fic was like...one of the first collabs i’ve ever done? in general, collaborations were always something that made me nervous because it required lots of vulnerability and honesty, and there’s a side of me that’s very obsessed with having this image of Neat Writer Who Has Coherent Thoughts (which,,,doesn’t even exist so why was i obsessed? no idea). so that said, this collab was just. so wild + wonderful because it really was, first of all, such a cool, magical experience. there’s something so amazing and insane about passing words back and forth and like, even a screen apart, there’s something magical about like. sitting down at a laptop at the end of the day and feeling like you’re about to step into a portal where it’s just two people trying to spin a story. writing with kasey was just such a wonderful, absolutely magical experience, and i’m really glad that we got to write this story + the many more that we did. just. there’s something really personal and beautiful about writing until 1, 2, 3 am when the world’s asleep. anyways. magical.

asdfsdfd i’m very sorry that this got so incredibly long, but!! that said, 2020 was a hard year for lots of different reasons both personally + because of *gestures at the world* but. like. i’m really, really glad that i got back to writing clone wars fic this year, because i’ve met so many wonderful, wonderful, wonderful people here, and. yeah. y’all are my serotonin suppliers, and i do refer to a lot of people here as ‘oh yeah, my friend and i were talking the other day about...’ and ‘why are you smiling?’ ‘oh, just something a friend said--’ and. yeah. i hope y’all have a wonderful, wonderful rest of the year + also a wonderful life because y’all are simply the best :’))

no-pressure tags: @lightasthesun @meandmyechoes @soplantyourownflowers @ilonga @sonderwalker @mytardisisparked @60sec400 and really, honestly, anyone else who wants to!!! <333 (like. i mean it. literally. just tag me and lemme scream encouragements at you.)

#tag game #thank you!!#caroline stop writing essays challenge!!!!#i cannot and will not stop writing essays i guess adsfsdf

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