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WOOO POG DREAM SMP AU

theres 1.8k words and 9,393 characters of a schlatt au below the cut LMAO

[i was rambling to my friend and this is what came out of it! send me an abt it if u have questions i would love to talk abt it more pls]

(slight body horror/gore tw!!)

slams fists on table rattling any dishes on the table au where schlatt doesnt die of a heartattack and tubbo locks him up to rot basically and his horns grow into his eyes effectively blinding him and chained his hands together and basically a leash on him to keep him from moving around in his cell so he cant do anything to break the horns off before they get too long and one day when technos breaking into lmanberg he gets chased into the prison and loses them in the halls before coming across schlatts cell and schlatts calling out like 'whos there i can hear ur foot steps whos there please someone whos there' etc yk and technos speechless they thought they executed him to keep him from causing any more problems in the country but this is this is just much worse than anything he even thought theyd do and hes standing in front of schlatts cell just looking at him as if hes imagining it he knew lmanberg was bad but holy fuck they just let this man rot in a cell to the point of his own horns blinding him and giving him no aid or way to ease the pain so he makes himself known and schlatt 'ive never been so happy to see, well, hear an anarchist in my life, its good to see- hear you technoblade' and chuckles and blood runs down his face like tears would, few drops landing on his clothes before techno starts trying to get into the cell to take him out of there he cant leave him here sure he was an anarchist terrorist w a murder record but he had standards and now that schlatt wasnt in power he had nothing against him really considering he isnt a citizen of lmanberg so he manages to pick the locks enough to get him out of there, schlatts arm slung over technos shoulder they stumble out of the prison building and as they slowly make their way to the nether portal to get back to technos base, they run into tubbo and quackity, schlatts old right hand men and they try to stop techno bc hes well an anarchist terrorist w a murder record but the glare techno gives them levels them and theyre left staring at each other for a moment when schlatt 'whyre we stopped whos there tech' and techno mumbles 'tubbo and quackity schlatt' and schlatt just furrows his brows as far as he can without sending excruciating pain into his eye sockets before he purses his lips and asks 'are they going to try and stop us?' techno looks back at the other two 'no they wont, isnt that right boys?' tubbo and quackity slink away allowing techno and schlatt to the portal and them going thru, schlatt still silent as he tries not to trip over technos cape or off the ledge of the bridge passing over the lava lakes, they make it to the portal and begin the walk across the arctic tundra to technos house, philza isnt there right now so its just the two of them and techno leads him up the ladder to his room (its not really a room i think its just a bed, a bell and an enchantment table) and sits him down on his bed mumbling something abt being right back and he is with some medical supplies and a change of clothes to clean everything up, they dont talk techno works in silence and when schlatt winces he mumbles a small apology before continuing eventually techno got schlatt as cleaned up as you can get someone w horns in their eyes and a sweater to keep him warm and finally starts asking questions 'how long had u been in there' 'lost count' 'did they bring you food' 'a chests worth at the beginning of the month' techno sighs 'i thought they executed you' 'tubbo chickened out despite me being 'an active threat to our peace in lmanberg' and locked me up a few days after u set the withers loose and dropped off a chest of food once a month and most of them refused to talk to me others couldnt even make eye contact with me, other than the few instances where they said things like 'heres ur food' or 'u deserve this' or 'i cant believe tubbo let u live' i talked to no one other than myself for however long i was in there' techno stands and walks around for a moment before flipping some pages and schlatt can hear him gasp quietly in mild surprise 'what is it tech' looking in the direction he heard techno from and techno says, turning to face schlatt on his bed 'schlatt that was almost 3 months ago' a single beat of silence rings for what feels like forever 'oh. i, i didnt think itd been that long. though it would explain my current predicament' loosely gesturing towards his face 'oh right abt that i have a few questions if ur ready to answer some' schlatt hums and techno grabs a pen and paper and sits next to him in case he needs to take any notes for future reference 'how fast do ur horns normally grow' 'idk just a steady amount my whole life pretty much' 'will they ever stop growing' 'they generally stop growing around 30 and continue to grow more in width than length' 'did anyone who brought u food notice' 'they grow quickly and by the time the person w the third chest came around they were getting close to my eyes but they didnt listen to me, no one did' he sighs looking down at would be his hands 'the odds of both of my horns growing into my eyes and blinding me like this are so low but of course it would happen to me' a chuckle void of any amusement 'because losing my country and my people and my power wasnt enough already' techno stands up 'you had that coming' schlatt actually laughs this time, short and curt 'ok fair, u were the one that took me down afterall' and from then on schlatt lives w techno and phil and eventually tommy and then without tommy (tommy was Not happy when he found out that schlatt was living with techno but he needed somewhere to stay too and techno happens to live in an arctic tundra where only a handful of people know how to get to so he didnt complain too much) and eventually techno saws off schlatts horns at the bend adn removes them from his eyes bc if they kept growing into his head theyd hit his brain and kill him on top of blinding  him and techno gags and almost throws up despite not being sensitive to gore  and gives schlatt a bandanna to cover the holes in his head for everyones sake and once they heal somewhat he can find something else out and thats how they live, schlatt helps with what he can like farming w phil but mostly spends his time learning braille or something so he can read and techno gets him books in braille so he isnt bored or alone like he was in the prison and he feeds him and takes care of him and schlatt is funny and entertaining despite being blinded by something from his own body and the torture it was like to rot in a cell alone for almost a 1/4 of a year and nights when techno gets home late and hes shaken and the voices are bad schlatt will sit behind him and play with his hair and talk abt his own day and rub technos back and in return when schlatt relapses and gets violent and angry techno will wash his hair and read him stories until he calms down and hopefully asleep and no one told him the news that wilbur died so when ghostbur shows up and starts talking to him he treats him the same as he would wilbur bc he cant see that hes a ghost all thats different is his speech pattern and overall personality and one day he says 'ur different wilbur what happened to that, i dunno spark u used to have' and wilbur simply 'im not sure if im being honest a lot abt me has changed since i died, or so im told i dont remember much from when i was alive' and schlatt just 0_0 and then hes scrambling down the ladder and stumbling around the house looking for techno, finding him in the basement working on something and when he gets there hes out of breath and his hands are shaking bc holy shit wilburs not only dead but a ghost and he was just talking to me and he doesnt remember what i did and and and and techno is shocked to see schlatt in the basement and asks whats up and schlatt just 'wilbur died wilbur fucking died tech why didnt anyone tell him and now hes a ghost hes a fucking ghost who lives in ur house and doesnt remember anything he doesnt remember that he blew up lmanberg does he he remembers my name but not anything that i did what hes a fucking ghost techno hes a ghost holy fuck' and technos just standing there like ??? no one no one told him 'yea philza had to kill him after he blew up lmanberg i thought u knew thats why i didnt say anything' oh. 'phil, phil had to kill him?' 'yea its a touchy subject, dont bring it up' and simply goes back to what he was working on so schlatt sits on the ground by the ladder and listens to him work his brain going a mile a minute trying to comprehend whats going on 'would i have become a ghost if theyd chosen to execute me?' 'its hard to say im unsure if theres specific circumstances that contribuite to someone becoming a ghost but theres really no telling' and goes back to working yet again and from then on they fall into an easy schedule of techno going out and doing whatever an anarchist terrorist w a murder record does on ur average wednesday and schlatt stays home reading and organizing whatever he can based on size and feeling and sleeping in windowsills and schlatt greeting techno comes home beaten up and full of new resources and a side of bruises and cuts so he tends to them, getting better at maneuvering and functioning without needing to see then techno making dinner and then curling up by the fire for the night enjoying each others company as they talk abt their days :]

!"kids please! i need everyone to calm down and ask your questions one at a time!" David stopped the kids from talking all at the same time. “I thought the fund raiser was a success! If we need money why dont the quartermaster just beat you guys up again!” Harrison stated while Malva was nodding “It actaully isnt a bad idea!”

-small time skip bcs i dont want to rewrite every line of dialog-

“does that mean.. we all have to split up?” Nikki asked with sadness in her voice. Everyone looked around at eachother with sad expressions.

“Hi Max. Its been a few days.. Have you made your descsion yet? Wich camp do you wanna go to? Vera is still.. Mad about the uhm.. events if you were wondering..” David asked the sad boy who was carrying a bunch of regret. “Im still thinking.” He answerd quickly turning the other way. “Come on Max.. i know its been hard especially since Neil, Nikki-” Max remeberd their faces filled with rage and sadness. He even brought Malva to tears. “God damn! Dont you have counsler counsling to prep for or something?! Just leave me alone!” He cut David off and walked away.

“I cant belive im saying this but.. I dont know if i wanna go to science camp!” Neil said looking at his friends, looking a little longer at Malva. “Yeah! What fun is adventuring without you guys!” Nikki joined in. “I just want things to be back to normal!” Vera continued. “I just want to be able to enjoy my summer. dosnt really help that my uh... lady problems...? are hittting in strong!” Malva ended it. “Max what do we do?!” Neil desperatly asked max his eyes getting glossy. Max was doing something on davids phone and didnt pay attention to the others. “Max?” Nikki asked once again also tearing up. “Huh? Are you guys still fraking out about this? Whats your problem?” Max rudely said turning away from the phone. “Our problem?” Neil questioned Max’s rude comment. “damnit..” Malva mumbled under her breath on the verge of tears. “i dont wanna say goodbye yet! You guys are my friends!” Nikki frowned. “Yea Max. Wtf” Vera questioned Max aswell seeing him brining Malva on the verge of tears.”were like a wolf pack!” Nikki said with a slight smile. Neil chimed in “Or a team of scientists (somthing) doing a new study!” “Or a wolf pack!” Nikki obviously liked her idea better.  “Jesus guys. Grow up! Did you think summer was gonna last forever? It was always gonna end this way! Camp campbell comes to a close, you get sent home, you move on with your lives.” Max said doing something on the phone once again, looking up from it at the end. “Look, we had a good run! But we were temporally friends at best!” Max ended it. The small group of friends looked at him in schock turning into rage or sadness. “oh...” Nikki said looking down. Malva silently started crying trying to make it stop while hugging herself. Vera looked angry with a mix of sadness and confusion. Neil started speaking. “Really?! THATS all we are to YOU?” He said in pure frustration. “Fucking hell Max! I know your meant to be rude or something but thats just messed up!” Vera said slightly motioning to malva who was still silently crying looking down. Max felt the regret hit his body. “I mean.. Look Neil-” He started scratching the back of his neck.”Nonono you’re right! Why would someone like you need a friend?! You were fine on your own before we showed up!” Neil looked down then turning his gaze to malva and back up again. “You’ll be fine once were gone.” Neil walked off into the bus. “Nikki come on! You get it, right?” Max asked Nikki. Nikkis face turned into anger. “Bye Max” She said walking into the bus aswell. “Malva?” Max looked at the girl who looked up from the ground showing red puffy eyes. She quickly hugged Vera before walking into the bus the doors closing behind her. Max looked at Vera with regeret but she just flipped him off and walked back into camp.

- time skip,, again.. bcs... yeah...-

“Happy reunion?”

-Ok time skip again. brining thr camp back togheter burning camps 3 more left to pick up-

“thats... Almost everyone!” Max looked up from the clip bord in his hands with a smile. “Phew... this has been a eventful day!” Vera smiled at Max. “Just 3 names left!” David happily said. Max felt the regret come back again. “Yeah. i wonder how they are doing..” Vera said thinking about what Malva had told her in the past about her fear and how it keeps her up at night crying. She slightly frowned. “You know my favorite part is the look on the counslers faces when you mention the test Davey! Their all like ‘whoa what!?’“

- yet another time skip -

“Yeah thats the other thing... they are actually.. here” Gwen said looking over to the room where the three kids sat looking upset or jus scared. “Here at camp core we dislike using the phrase ‘trouble makers’ and uh..” The old man looked at Malva. “I dont know what to call your situation... uhm. well get back to that later. Anyways as i said we dont like to use the term ‘trouble makers’” “We prefer children in need of love. And young lady you need to get sleep.” The old lady said looking at Malva. She looked up from her knees (she was hugging her legs in her chair ya’know?) with dark cicles under her eyes that were also red and puffy. “I know that youve been.. up from the past 5 nights crying.” Neil and Nikki looked at Malva with sorrow and Neil reached out for her hand giving it a tight squeeze. He returned to his angry expression while still holding her hand. Nikki returned to her angry expression aswell. “Based on your recent behavior blah blah”

-time skip til’ gwen comes in-

“Thank godness for that duel major in sike! Am i right? Why dont you two get out of here while i chat with these little rascals!” Gwen bursted into the room while the owners left. She quickly closed the door and looked at the kids infront of her. “Lets get the fuck out of here.” She said dramatically.

“And then Nancy was like ‘whos an idiot?’ and i told her to mind her own fUCKING BUISNESS!” Gwen said while staning in the elavator with the 3 kids, Malva and Neil still holding hands. “Personally. Thats when i would have started with the biting.” Nikki proudly said. “Waitwaitwait! Can you go back for a second? Were getting the camp back?!” Neil looked suprised. Gwen looked at him with a smile and calm expression. “Oh. Yeah. And everybody is here.” Gwen simply said. Neil, Nikki and Malva looked at eachother with unease. “Everybody?” Neil and Nikki said in unsion while Malva continued to be quiet.

“Heeeey! Long time no see!” Max said while holding up his hand for a high five. Neil and Nikki looked unipressed while Malva still looked sad. Vera quickly ran up to her brining her into a hug. “Heard you all started a bit of mayhem at your camps? Guess im rubbing off on you.” He nudged Nikki. “If you use mayehem to describe putting someone in an emotional state making them stay up for 5 nights crying!” Neil said grabbing Malvas hand again.. just bcs it felt right. Vera let go of Malva and looked at her with sympathy. “Oh look its the temporally friend of ours!” Neil continued. “Yes, the friend that isnt permanent.” Nikki joined in. “Come on guys! Things are gonna go back to the way they were. I promise! Ive got a plan!” Max tried to convince them. “Interesting. I figured you would have moved on with your life right now.” Neil sarcastically said. “I will aslo add a sarcastic remark as soon as i can think of one.” Nikki said. “Oh my! David and Gwen blah bLAHBALH FUCKING BLAH BCS MORE -TIME SKIP BITCH DEAL WITH IT.-

“Im. Im sorry. I didnt go thru all this trouble for camp campbell.. I did it.. for you guys.” Max said. Malva softend up a bit. “You guys are my friends.. And i just didnt want to admit it. Just once the time actually got to say goodbye.. i had something to lose! Well you know... trying to go thru life alone seems pretty fucking stupid know.” They all turned and looked at cameron campbell. “Oh what?! Am i supposed to be the big bad example here?!” He said. “We did everything we said out to do by doing it togheter. and had a little fun while doing so! But everything fell apart when you pushed it away..” David confronted Campbell. “Well yea! But i won!” He defended himself. “Won what exactly?” Gwen said unimpressed. “I got my life back!I can leave this country behind and leave everything behind! just not thailand... or russia.. burned all the bridges with north korea..” He scratched his chin. “With all that money you can just buy some new friends who will eventually hate your guts too” Max stated. “Well i- uh-” Cmeron was lost of words.

“Well *sigh* i guess this is goodbye.” Max said turning to his friends. “I just wanted you to know... Ill miss you!” Nikki smiled and Neil looked suprised. Malva gave a small smile and looked at him. Vera looked proud that he actually said something nice for once. “And im sorry we couldnt be friend for longer..” Max continued rubbing his shoulder. “Dont be such a dummy Max!” Nikki started. “Yeah! We might never see eachother again, but we’ll always be friends.” Neil continued. “Oh and i snuck my phone with me *cough* so ican just give you all my number and just msg me so can we have a group chat!” Malva said with a raspy smile and a toothy grin. “Hell yeah! See we sont lose contact!” Vera slightly nudged Malvas shoulder as she wrote donw her number 3 times on a piece of paper. “Awwwwwww.” The older ones said. “Group hug!” Dolph said and David ran and hugged Gwen, Max, Vera, Malva, Neil and Nikki. Until they heard a bus driving off. “Campbells gone.” QM said and pointed outside. They all watched him drive off. “Wow that typical.” Ered said.  Davids phone started ringing that Max had in his pocket. “Uhm David. Your phone.” Max said and handed the phone to David.

-Blah Campbell has a speech or whatever hh-

-They have an adorable ass water gun fight and everyones happy running around-

- Campbell comes.-

“You will now be taking orders from him” Mr. Miller pointed at David. Evryone turned to David. “Now its perfect!” David said acomplished. “Welcome to camp, asshole!” Max said crossing his arms. “OUR camp, asshole!” Vera joined in and put her hand on Max’s shoulder in a sassy kin of way. Max looked at her with a tint of blush but she just winked >;3c

They all turned and did their own thing until only the group of 5 was left in front of the mess hall. Malva gave Neil a quick peck on the cheek before running off to god nows where neils face turning red. “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH SHIT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT!” Vera fangirled and they laughed at Neils blushing madness. Okay bye