the older sister SECRETLY !!! So sunghoon has 2 sisters and heeseung is dating the younger sister , but the more he hangs out with sunghoon and sees the older sister , the more they fall in love with each other . And that’s where the cheating starts ! IF THIS DOESN’T MAKE SENSE I CAN TEXT U PRIVATELY . If u do this for me I consider u as my sister 🥹😚💗

“I like her, but I love you…”

Warnings: College boy Heeseung cheating in secret, older fem. lead, smut....rough smut....kind of animalistic, craving, like 'oh-my, oh-my God! this c*ck's pumping crazy' smut. unprotected smut. 9k word count, so get your popcorn out.

Bday gift for @hoyeonheeseung

PS: H/N stands for “her name”. Left her name blank.

Thank you for taking the time and reading my stories and drabbles. To show your support, please consider donating into my ko-fi account ♥️

“Hey man, how are things going with you and h/n?”

“Good, she’s my little troublemaker.” Referring to his girlfriend and the younger sister of his best friend, Sunghoon, Heeseung chuckles as he dwells into the little tidbits concerning his established relationship.

“Yeah she can be a handful. But don't forget, she’s only eighteen, it’s not like she’s our age.” Sunghoon responds in jest, chuckling as he winks over to his friend.

“Yeah, I know. I keep that in mind all the time, which is probably why I let her get away with a lot, and am more patient with her than I should be.”

Nodding his head, Sunghoon pats Heeseung’s shoulder as the two walk over to their parked cars.

“So I was going to ask you, are you planning on coming by tomorrow?” Sunghoon asks. Raising a brow over from across his vehicle, Heeseung answers loosely. “Yeah, h/n says she wanted me to meet some of her friends from school, and they were all going to be over at your place. You guys having a party or something?” Tossing his books into the front passenger seat, Heeseung turns back towards Sunghoon.

“Yeah I figured she had already asked you to come by, her friends are all going to be at the house because, well, our eldest sister moved back to the area after accepting a new job. Guess she wanted to be closer to the family, so my parents are throwing a homecoming party for her.”

“That right?” Twirling his tongue, Heeseung had known Sunghoon since they started college, nearly four years ago. Being on their last year together, Heeseung furrowed his brow, slightly surprised. “I didn’t even know you guys had an older sister.”

“Oh yeah man, I probably forgot to mention her because she’s been living abroad. She left the year I started attending college, right before I met you. She normally calls in and emails us, but hasn’t visited because her job is so demanding. But she says this new job is going to give her a lot more free hour.”

“Huh, I was wondering why H/N mentioned that all of her friends would be over. Makes sense now. But yeah man, I’ll be there. I’ll probably take H/N to the movies or something after the festivities are done with.”

“Cool man. See you tomorrow then.”

“Yup, see ya.”

………………………

You woke up early the next morning to the soft light of the spring sun peeking through the bedroom window. Laid out on the side table was a list of residential neighborhoods and apartments nearby, some circled in black ink. You had moved in with your parents and siblings, only just for a period until you could establish your own place. For now, you took the opportunity to enjoy lost time with them. Getting dressed, you chose a simple yet elegant floral dress, that fitted your form nicely. The hem of the skirt tastefully flows inches above your kneecaps, while the tie straps gently rest on top your shoulders. Walking down the stairs, you meet with your mother inside the kitchen.

“Oh, hi mom.”

“Good morning y/n! Did you want some coffee?”

“Yes, thank you.”

Pouring you a cup, your mother sits down and enjoys the one-on-one moment with you, while you both sipped on your favorite latte’s. Turning your gaze over to the window, you spot your mother’s garden in full bloom. While you were away, she had planted your favorite flowers to remind herself of you during your absence.

“Oh mom, I really like what you did with your garden.”

“Thank you, baby.”

Chuckling, you giggle out your words as you playfully bite your lip, a small habit you’ve had for as long as you could remember. “You planted my favorite flowers?”

“Of course! I had to have something to remind me of you while you were gone for so long.” The tone of her words reflected her happiness in having you back home. Reaching across the table, you take her hand and reassured her that you wouldn’t be away from here on out.

“I promise, I'm here to stay mama.”

“I know. But you don’t have to rush, you can stay here with me, your dad, your brother and sister.”

Looking down at your cup, you gently sip while you speak. “I’ll stay for a bit, but you don't have to worry Mama. When I move out. I’ll limit myself to a 10-mile radius so I can be close to home. I promise.” Winking, you watch as your mother smiles sincerely at your resolve. You felt guilty for being away for so long, not to mention your career limited you from gaining the opportunity to travel and visit home. Now, things would be different. Sure, you had to take on a position that was slightly less pay than what you were making before, and you had a wonderful team that you left behind, but that all didn’t matter anymore. You had set your priorities firmly to put family first, and everything else following second. With your brother finishing up college, and your sister beginning her first year at the same university in the following months, you knew that your parents would have been too lonely, so you made your decision and submitted your two weeks’ notice to your boss three months ago, and had been enjoying the time missed ever since.  

“Oh, how did you sleep last night? I tried to get H/N to give you back your old room for just a few nights, but you know your sister…”

Chuckling, you bit your lip again as you playfully shook your mother’s hand. “It’s okay. The guest room was nice and quiet. Plus, I’ve always liked it up there.” After you had moved out, your sister took over your old room, which happened to be the second largest bedroom in the house, with your parent’s master suite being the biggest. The bedrooms all shared the same hall, but the guest bedroom was nestled away up on the third floor, originally as the attic.  However, your parents designed it to be formatted as a guest room for family visits and had kept it as such ever since.

**** photo of bedroom

When finding out that you were moving back home, your mother went through great lengths to fix up the guest space after H/N had initially begged, then later refused, to give back your old room. Yet you didn’t mind, the guest room was laid out with gaudy floral wallpaper but was actually, quite cozy, and nicely tucked away from the remaining bedrooms, which all were located on the first level. The second floor had a nice family room, along with a guest bath, additional office spaces that your father used as his private study, and a small sitting room. The way things were set, you felt like the little princess you always used to dream yourself as, locked away in your tower with all of your favorite books and a great view of your mother’s garden.

“Sis!”

 You turn your head over to the sliding door near the dining room and watch as H/N runs over and sits next to you. “Can I borrow that one dress you have? The red sexy one! Pleeeeease!” Bouncing in her seat, your sister eagerly begs as she taps her artistically extreme manicured nails on the table. Adorned in clusters of jewels and painted in neon colors, you took a moment to notice how lengthy the exaggerated pointed acrylics were.

“Yeah, sure.”

“EEEEEEEEEK! YAAAY! Thank you Y/n!” Hugging your neck and placing a quick peck on your cheek, h/n runs up the stairs, causing quite the clamor on her way up. You chuckled and smirked as you heard her run up, scurrying through your closet and dressers for that simple red dress you wore for work. It was a formal piece, one that you wore under a blazer whenever you went into the office, and it was a bit too sophisticated for a homecoming party, but you already knew that once your sister had her mind set on something, there was no changing it.

The visitors started to show up, collecting out in the backyard where all the decorations and food was nicely laid out. Your mother and her friends had displayed a massive spread of assorted dishes on a long picnic table. Sunghoon assisted with placing the decorations up, while H/N mingled with her friends. You were taking one last glance over the residential properties on the rental ad before placing it back down on your side table. You head down towards the kitchen, however, upon arriving on the second floor, you run into H/N and her group of friends as they walk up to catch you in the guest room. “Oh! Sis! Perfect timing!” H/N runs over to your side and links her arm with yours. “Guys, this is my sister y/n.”

“Wow….you’re so pretty.”

“Your hair is so long and shiny!”

“Gosh why is it that older girls are always the prettiest?”

“Its probably because they learn from each other’s makeup and hair styles in college.”

One by one, h/n’s friends all admire you while talking aloud, taking a moment to feel your hair, stare at your dress, and ask about your makeup tips. They displayed a look of shock when you exposed that you were wearing minimal products, keeping it simple with blush, lipstick, and some eyeshadow. You were always one to avoid heavy makeup, opting to keep things real and simplistic.

“Thats it?! That’s all you’re wearing? How are you so pretty with so little makeup?”

“I can’t wait to be older so I can be just as cool and sexy as you. I like that womanly confidence, my own older sister has that same vibe.”

Chuckling, you playfully side eye H/N as she proudly presents you to her posse. “See? I told you! My older sister is the prettiest!”

Skipping as she drags you along, H/N finally lets you go when you all reach the kitchen. “Sis, you coming out?” H/N screeches out. She was always so flamboyant and quite loud, more than likely due to the excitement she had in showing you off. “Come out so we can show you some of our cheers that we’ve been practicing!”

“Oh alright, gimme a second. I’m just going to grab some water and I’ll be right out.”

“Okay! Hurry up!” She shouts out and leaves. You had nearly forgotten that H/N was continuing her cheerleading curriculum, even in college, and planned on entering the cheer competitions. Pouring yourself a glass of water, you quietly gaze through the window and watch as the number of guests grew larger. Minutes past, and more people enter through the gate in the yard. A sudden scream of excitement is heard from afar outside, and you knew it was H/N and her friends. Shaking your head while you smirked, you sipped on your drink as you checked your phone on some work-related matters, before placing it down on the kitchen island and prepared yourself to walk out and greet the guests.

…….

“Oh my God Heeseung!!! You’re here!”

Running towards him, H/N jumps up as Heeseung catches her in his arms. Gripping onto his hair and overbearing him with kisses, Heeseung winces his eyes shut and gives it a moment before finally speaking out. “Okay, okay. I get it, I missed you too.” He chuckles as he lets her down.

“Come meet my friends! They’ve all been dying to meet you and oh my Gosh! Can we go to the mall later? I want to show you off to all my friends that are working at the stores today!” Jumping up and down, completely hyperactive as she holds onto his hand, H/N eagerly waits for Heeseung to answer. He couldn’t lie to himself, as much as he cared for her, her hyperactive personality could overwhelm him sometimes, much like her friends. It was nothing out of the ordinary, however, for him it wasn’t something he was quite used to, given that all of his other girlfriends were his age and in college. This was the first time he decided to dip into someone as young as H/N. At times, he felt he needed to break away whenever she had her moments where that teen spunk was over the top.

“We’ll see.” He answers.

“But whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy? Please please please!” pulling on his arm, H/n expresses her pleas in a shrill and loud voice as she displays a puppy-eyed countenance, pouting her lip to exaggerate her desperation.

“Let’s just see how the day goes, h/n. Besides, after the day is done, I was planning on taking you to the movies.”

“Oh! The movies!!!” She jumps up with excitement while her mother gently shushes from the side. “H/n, shhh, quiet.” your mother whispers over secretly to H/N. “You’re making a scene.”

Huffing out, H/N shrugs off her mother’s warning before resuming her gaze back to Heeseung. “Can my friends come?” She asks excitingly.

“You don’t want to go together? Just the two of us?” He calmly winks over. “Oh my God!! Heeseung!!” She shouts out and giggles, stirring a commotion among the guests, which had caused Heeseung to immediately grow wide eyed and shoot a hand over her mouth, all out of sudden instinctive reaction.

Heeseung eventually met up with Sunghoon, and the two standoff at a distance enjoying a beer while H/N and her friends all swoon over the newest kpop group stepping into the scene of popularity. “Oh my God he’s hot as fuck!” H/n can be heard admiring aloud, once again earning a quick tap on her arm from your mom, gesturing her to be more polite and quiet. Never minding that Heeseung could hear, in h/n’s mind, it was okay for her to openly swoon so long as it wasn’t with someone that was realistically achievable, plus, she was a young girl with a lot of emotions and hormones that caused her to be overly expressive, as well as experiencing a change of heart nearly every day. One moment she was into one particular thing, the next she was into something entirely different. Zoning off as he watches the girls indulge into their typical gossip, Heeseung takes another sip out of his beverage before engaging in conversation with Sunghoon.

“So, how is your other sister holding up being back home?”

“She’s loving it. Which….where is she? She should be out here since this is her party.” Sunghoon looks around, yet the lack of your sighting caused him to reach out to your guy's mom for confirmation. “Mom, where is y/n?”

“Oh well she should be– oh! There she is.” Catching the sight of you walking out through the back sliding door, your mother’s sentence is cut short with the pleasant note of your appearance. “Y/N, over here!” she calmly shouts out your way, waving for you to come to her direction.

Walking calmly, you nod and say hello to everyone you walk past, flaring a sweet and soft smile as you greet them before reaching your mother.

“Oh hey, Y/N! Let me introduce you real quick before mom steals you away, this is my good friend, Heeseung. He and I had been friends since our first year together. He’s also h/n’s boyfriend.”

Surprised, you pleasantly smiled towards the young man and extended your hand to shake and greet him. You heard all about H/N’s boyfriend, especially since the latter couldn’t contain her excitement and talked of nothing else since the moment they started dating, sending you at least a handful of emails a day talking about him. It was just surprising since she never revealed him to be an older college male, nor did she mention that he was good friends with Sunghoon.

“Nice to meet you, I’ve heard alot about you from h/n. She’s really taken with you.” flashing a charming smile, you delicately shift the pieces of your hair framing your face and tuck it behind your ear as the gentle breeze blows through it. Unlike H/N, you opted to leave your hair un-styled, letting it fall freely in its natural state, which enhanced your features and placed you above all the girls Heeseung has ever laid eyes on, to include the girls at his college, and H/N.

“Yeah…nice to meet you.” Stunned by your natural and yet sophisticated sense of manners, your appeal had struck Heeseung out of his right-minded state and he found himself at a loss for words. Leaving his response short and simple, you nod and make your way over to your mother. Sunghoon went on about one thing or another, yet Heeseung paid no mind, he tried to keep it from being obvious, but it was hard. Fortunately no one really noticed. Keeping his face towards his best friend, his eyes kept shifting over your way, glancing periodically as he did his best to get an eye full of your image before reengaging with Sunghoon.

………………..

“So yeah, we were doing this in class the other day when….”

“Mmhmm…..”

“And then the dude literally started to get into this argument with my professor….”

“Oh yeah? …..”

“Right in front of the entire class.”

“Crazy man.”

Noting Heeseung’s spurt responses, Sunghoon pauses in his storytelling. “Heeseung, you good man?”

“Hm?...Oh yeah, no I'm good. You were saying? The guy argued with your professor and what now?”

“Oh. For a second I didn’t think you were listening.” Chuckling as he sips on his beer, Sunghoon continues, not catching on to Heeseung’s habitual habit of roaming his gaze over where you stood. Admiring the calm, mature, and graceful woman that you are, he was becoming smitten with you.

 It was strange, he thought that he’d seen every type of woman there was to see. The college girls at his university, or H/n and her friends, all of whom shared similarities, but carried minor differences in their character. Yet despite all that, they were nothing compared to the level of true feminine beauty that you held. All in all, when it came to the girls his age, they were all somewhat stuck up and believed that they had their lives completely figured out, but lacked the will to prioritize their days appropriately and spent more nights partying and sleeping around campus. Then there were girls like h/n, younger, filled with life but had no clue as to how to deal with it. Often living rather childishly and carrying no balance when it came to expressing themselves or developing their feminine nature. They didn’t have life figured out and it showed, and most times, they flared off exactly what they were, a bunch of teenage girls, nothing more.

Then there was you, a young woman in her prime that had already surpassed the stages of her teen years, and survived her college days, albeit you handled it gracefully since Sunghoon had already mentioned that you spent your entire time in college taking online courses, so you could stay home and help out your family. You ignored the typical college life of rotting away in a classroom, dealing with the pressures of your peers, and the late-night partying. Instead, you worked your way through during the day, diligently on your home computer, and then carried on your free time to assist with family matters. If that wasn’t already virtuous enough, you graduated with an excellent standing in your class and obtained a respectable career. You were nothing like the women and girls he’s been exposed to. The way you carried yourself confidently, gracefully, so smooth, elegant, and your pretty appeal had a sense of smoldering essence, which he found devastatingly sexy. What type of woman were you and where had you been all this time?

Throughout the entire event, Heeseung remained out of character and rather on the quiet side, which he claimed was all due to tiredness from late night studying, or so he lied when telling Sunghoon and h/n. By the end of the event, he lies once more and tells H/N that he had too much to drink to drive out to the movies or the mall, and opted to stay back with Sunghoon until the alcohol wears off before safely driving back home. H/N didn’t seem to be too upset about the ordeal, considering one of her friends had a license and a car of her own. Bidding Heeseung goodbye with a quick peck on the lips, h/n departs with her posse while Heeseung and Sunghoon assist with the cleanup.

“I’ll take this inside for you.” Taking the load of stacked plates, Heeseung effortlessly carries them away and heads towards the kitchen. “Oh thank you Heeseung.” Your mom gently responds back with.

Sunghoon helps out your dad with taking down the festive decorations and lighting, white your mother picks up the remaining trash. Placing the dishes in the sink, Heeseung turns on the faucet to lukewarm and begins filling it with warm soapy water. You walk in, inadvertently sneaking up behind, which was the most pleasant surprise for him, unbeknownst to you.

“Oh hey, you don’t have to do that, I can take care of those.” You gently speak out as you walk up to the sink. He turns his head and sees you enter the kitchen, gasping out of bewilderment. God, you were a sight for sore eyes. Where did you come from? Surely not the same way h/n and Sunghoon came into this world, you were far too ethereal in his eyes.

“Oh, it’s fine. I don't mind helping out, I do it often actually.” Knowing his way around the kitchen, he takes a sponge and starts to wash each dish. You stood next to him and grabbed a spare sponge and helped out. He was awfully tall, and despite being quiet, he seemed very nice, you could see why your family liked him. H/n had often talked about Heeseung spending a great deal of time over at your parents house, spending days after classes hanging out with her and Sunghoon,. With as much time he spent over, he was practically part of the family, it's no wonder he knew where everything in the kitchen was.

“Are you excited to be in your last year of college?” You asked calmly, making conversation as you scrubbed, and he rinsed. Displaying a wide and overly happy grin, he chuckles bashfully as he bites his lower lip. “Yeah, I am. I bet you were pretty happy when you finished.”

“Yeah, I was.” you nodded with a smile and a small giggle. “But I can’t lie, I do miss the days where all I had to focus on was being a diligent daughter and student. Being on your own and facing the world head on can be scary sometimes.” you softly state as you glanced over to him with a tender smile.

“Oh God don’t do that….don’t look at me with those beautiful shiny eyes…and that gorgeous smile of yours…..you’re making me melt…..and you don’t even know it.” 

Mentally noting the greatness of your appeal, Heeseung gently shrugged off the image of your face in order to avoid staring.

Spending the next thirty minutes washing the plates had to be the greatest highlight of his life. His heart felt as if it was going to explode, you were a bewilderment to him and he couldn’t get enough of the way you smiled, sound, and laughed. Your large dark eyes, that shiny black hair, and that damn olive complexion. God had spent extra time on you, perfecting his craft as he created the greatest gift to earth, you.

Over the timespan of weeks, Heeseung spent a great deal over at your parents’ home, which didn’t seem at all odd considering he was already coming over well before you had moved back home. Using Sunghoon and even H/n as an excuse for his visit, he relished the moments you came down to grace everyone with your presence. It was actually quite impressive how no one sensed or caught on in seeing how enamored he was with you. All those moments when he and h/n were watching Nextflix in the living room, snuggling in the corner end of the sectional couch with Sunghoon on the opposite end. You’d walk past through the hallway and enter the wide, open floor concept and head towards the kitchen when Sunghoon would gently invite you to join them.

…….

“Sis, what’re you doing? Have you watched this show? Come sit and watch it with us, it’s getting good.”

…….

Whenever you accepted the invite, and took a seat on the large couch, Heeseung took advantage of the lack of lighting, with only the TV being the source, and used it to hide the fact that he would stare and admire you during the entire show. With you facing the TV and paying attention to the plot, as did everyone else, no one ever could suspect that Heeseung was falling for you, hard. That obsessive and uncontrollable stare was something that only he knew about, and it made him yearn for you more as each day passed.

……………………

“Hey Heeseung, the company y/n works for is hosting a weeklong internship program. I know we don't have any plans to work for that corporation, but figured, why not take a week-long break away from campus and classes. You in?”

“Her company is hosting an internship for a week?”

“Yeah man. I asked her about it and even asked if she can pull some ropes and become our aid, show us around, pretty much just hang out. We can take that time to chill out.”

“Yeah, I’d like that. I’m in.”

He was in, alright, but for entirely different reasons. He could care less about taking a rest period away from campus and classes, he would spend his days in a grueling classroom for hours, wasting away, if it meant that he’d be with you.

It didn’t take much to get Heeseung and Sunghoon accepted, you pretty much had established a decent reputation within your company, so taking on the tasks of showing the two internees around, out and about, was something that was accepted without any hesitation. The first day, the two men showed up wearing proper attire of business-casual suits; you walked past the security after exiting the elevator, flaring your VIP pass. Greeting the two, Heeseung caught himself widening his eyes for the thousandth time when he saw you. You carried out your typical habit of wearing bare, minimum makeup, but this time your hair was nicely styled, and you wore an elegant haltered, collared button up midi-dress, paired with black stilettos. You not only looked professional, but sleek and powerful, much different from your carefree style you flaunted when lounging at home.

“My God…this woman is a queen…she’s classy, sexy, pretty, and smart….she’s just….she’s everything.” he thought.

“Hey, were you guys waiting for long?”

“Nah, we just got here. Pretty nice place you work at, sis.” Sunghoon comments as he winks in your direction, remarking the incredible building and strict security.

Giggling at your brother’s sense of humor, you playfully narrow your eyes at him. “Thanks.” chuckling, you tuck a piece of your hair behind your ear, something that you constantly did since you always opted to keep your hair down, even when styled. The way you would delicately finger the strands behind the helix of your ear, revealing your pretty earrings, had Heeseung swore up and down that his heart was going to stop beating.

“Should I take you guys up and show you around?” you ask, to which both men nod in agreement. They had looked so suave and handsome, and you couldn’t help but admire, whenever he wasn’t looking, that Heeseung had a very dashing smile and looked very nice in a suit. You had to admit, there was something about the way he would chuckle or smile at you; you figured he had that same effect on everyone else, yet little did you know, his countenance was far more special whenever he was looking your way. You, the woman who was stirring a rumble of chaos in his heart, all out of love and infatuation. How was he ever going to get over you? How was he going to move on if he stayed with H/N? Knowing that you’re her sister. Or…worse….how was he going to live? If things didn't work out between him and H/N…knowing that he may never see you again. As shameful it was for him to admit, but never hating the fact, he was merely keeping his relationship with H/N alive for the sole purpose to keep in constant contact with you, and even…his friendship with Sunghoon. His relation to his best friend was still dear to him, but he found it hard to find any other reason to come by your parents home, other than to see you.

During the internship, you spent a great deal of time with Sunghoon and Heeseung, even after the event had ended, your bond with both Sunghoon and Heeseung continued to grow. Since H/N was in her own little world and spent much of her time with friends and hanging out after cheerleading practice, Heeseung found himself available to build a steadfast relationship with you.

Another week later, your bond started to become much closer…with Heeseung. With Sunghoon attending his classes, some of which he did share with Heeseung, others were separate, your younger brother had aspirations for a career that differed from his best friend, not to mention the presence of a young lady he had been frequenting with. Heeseung knew about her, and encouraged his friend to take the chance after the young woman had expressed interest in his dear friend. Sunghoon agrees and ever since, you had been seeing less of him around the house. But Heeseung remained, always dropping off H/N and spending some time with her at the house, normally watching movies or tv shows. However, when H/N became more engrossed with her friends and attending house parties thrown by people she knew, her presence became lacking. Heeseung never had any interest to attend events that were filled with younger teens, so of course, he would spend more time hanging out with you. In no time,  Heeseung and you had started to become close, and even had each other’s phone numbers.

You had sold your car before the move, and had the means to get a new one, yet when Heeseung frequently offered to give you rides and encouraged you to contact him whenever you needed transportation, it became a railroad that connected you two together. You had long forgotten about buying your own vehicle, it became routine for Heeseung to meet up with you, that he did it without you even texting him. He knew your schedule and would show up promptly to take you to work, pick you up, or stop at the store along the way home. During the weekends, whenever you felt like getting away, you would call him and invite him to a day of leisure, which he happily and always accepted. He was enjoying the amount of time he got to spend with you, it became the highlight of his time. Since meeting and forming a bond with you, there hadn't been a single bad day, even when classes were overbearingly long and going past schedule, his heart and mind was only filled with the image of your face and the sound of your voice. He couldn't wait to see you every day after his classes ended.

On a gloomy Saturday morning, you had the entire house to yourself. With your parents gone on a trip until Monday, H/N out on cheerleading camp, and Sunghoon taking his new lady friend out for the entire day on a date, you felt a bit lonely and bored. Taking your phone, you text Heeseung to see if he was up to go out to your favorite cafe. He was delighted and expressed he would be right over.

Pulling up to the driveway, Heeseung steps out and heads for the front door. Having been treated as an extending member of the family, he unlocks the door with the house key that once belonged to H/N, but her terrible habit in losing the previous spare copies had allotted your parents to encourage for her to give it to Heeseung to hold on to. Since he had always picked her  and her friends up after cheer practice, and dropped them off at home, it had made sense for him to keep hold of it, especially now with H/N away at camp. Entering the house, he calls out gently to make you aware that he arrived.

“Y/N, I’m here.” 

Hearing his voice from downstairs, you make your way over to greet him. “Hey, sorry for the wait, just going to grab my phone and wallet and we can go.”

He didn’t hear a single word you said. Only the sound of your voice and the image of your perfect visual was all he could process. You chose a flirty and tasteful summer dress, which had fit you so beautifully. It was without patterns, just a solid teal color that complimented your features greatly. Your hair swayed with every move you made, and he lost his complete train of thought as you shut of the lights. With the entire first floor darkened, the dim glare from upstairs peered in through the staircase. “Oh shoot, I must have left the light on in the guest room. I’ll be right back.”

“Kay…”

Walking back up the stairs, you enter the guest bedroom that featured all of your belongings nicely staged amidst the furnishings your parents had prepared. Walking over to the lamp, you glanced over to the window next to you and noticed how magnificent the moon had looked. It was bright and full, glowing in a range of orange and golden hues. Staring off into its glorified image, you thought of the last time you had seen the moon this beautiful. It was back when you were H/N’s age, and you were about to graduate high school, immediately preparing for college entry. Lost in a sense of nostalgia, you drifted so deep in your thoughts that you didn’t even hear his footsteps going up the stairs, entering the attic, and walking up from behind. You didn’t hear his shallow breath as he breached closer, and like you, he continued to take in a sight of something dazzling, one that wasn’t pearly perched in the middle of the night sky, but was equally, if not, more beautiful.

Coming up from behind you, he calls to you. “You okay?”

“Hm? Oh…sorry. Yeah, I’m fine, I was just looking at the moon and it got me thinking for a second.”

“Yeah?...” Softly dashing a side smile, he looks out the window and peers at the moon for a moment, then looks back over to you. “What are you thinking about?”

“I just…I don’t know, I was just thinking about when I last saw the moon like this. I was h/n’s age.”

Biting down on his lip, his eyes shift down to your hips before as he takes one step closer. Looking back up at you, his gaze was more stern, hungry even, and intense. “Yeah?....Were you just as amazing back then as you are now?”

Shifting backward, your breathing becomes deep and shaky as you take in his rather fierce stare. He looked so ruthless, yet his tone was soft and gentle. “He-Heeseung….?” You spoke out nervously.

“Answer me…” he softly tells you, as he takes another step forward, and watches as you take one back. His aura and stance was intimidating, much different than his usual persona. He faintly tilts his head to the side and widens his eyes as he stares directly into you. “Tell me….y/n…..were you always as bright as the moon? And as warm as the sun? Were you always as gentle as the fluttered wings of a butterfly, and as swift as the summer breeze?”

He continues to take his steps forward, speaking in a near whisper. You kept the distance in between your bodies while taking your steps back, until you felt your shoulders meet with the wall. Lowering your hands and reaching behind, your palms contact the cool surface, and your fingers tap along the small threaded grooves of the wallpaper, desperately trying to find something…anything to get a grip or to get away from the tension…which was starting to make you cave in. “Heeseung….He-Heeseung….don’t….we….we can’t…”

“What?....”

“Just….please….” sensing the intense desire he yearned for you, his eyes become glazed with the lust of passion and hunger. “Can’t what, y/n?” he softly speaks out, now closing the distance and meeting you chest to chest. “Heeseung…please…” you whimpered out softly. His gaze was doing something to you, it was almost as if he was calling for you, and your body was responding against your wishes. There was something about the way he was whispering your name, thirsting for you with his hungry eyes, and pressing up on your body, trapping you against the wall. There was something about the way his whispered words were antagonizing you to bid a suitable answer, one that you could not think of, yet he kept asking you…

“Can’t what?....” Raising his hands, he places both palms on the wall to each side of your head. Leaning into your ear, he whispers your name. “Y/n….”

You turned your face away, winced your eyes shut and avoid any sort of both, physical and eye contact. His hard chest presses against your breasts, and his groin meets with your pelvis. “Heeseung…..sssstop…..this is wrong….”

“If it’s wrong then push me away….come on baby….push….me….like how you’ve been pushing me.”

Turning your face straight forward, you looked at him confused. He nearly glares at you as he speaks in a firm tone. “Yes….that’s right, I said ‘push me’. You’ve had no problems doing it all this time. Pushing me over the edge…pushing me out of reality….pushing me into a state of madness and hunger……pushing me to love you harder….”

Widening your eyes at what seemed to be his confession of love to you, you shift around and placed your hands on his chest, gently pushing him outward, yet you weren’t pushing hard enough. You were shocked. Was Heeseung really in love with you? But more importantly…were you just now realizing that you might be feeling the same about him? You shook your head, trying to come back to a rational sense and reminded yourself of h/n and her relationship with Heeseung. Keeping your hands on him, you push just slightly harder, yet he leans forward, causing your arms and hands to retract back.

“Push harder….” He whispers against your cheek.

“Heesung we can’t…..we can’t do this…”

“Then push harder…” grabbing onto your hand as it lays plastered on his chest, he strokes the back of your palm as he continues to whisper onto your skin. “Come on baby….push harder.”

The way his pursed lips grazed against your skin, and the way his voice sounded when he called you ‘baby’, it may have been weakness or desperation, maybe it was a little bit of both, either way, you stopped caring. You came to realize the truth behind the close bond you built with this man, and how you came to be so fond of him. How his smile always caused your heartbeat to escalate, and how his voice sounded whenever he said your name, causing your stomach to flip upside down. Once more, he whispers deeply, this time, it was against your lips, all the while he stared into your hazy eyes.

“Push it…..keep pushing it y/n……”

Whimpering, you falter. “I…..I…….”

“Yeah?...” his voices begin to peak.

“I……Heeseung…..”

Smothering his lips against yours, you melt in his sudden embrace. You reach up and wrap your arms around his neck, further going numb when you felt his arms grip around your waist and lifts you to deepen that hold he had on you. Softly moaning into your mouth, he deepens the kiss and feeds his tongue as deep as he possibly could. Running out of air, you both wait til the very last second upon reaching the pinnacle of lightheadedness, before faintly breaking the kiss. With his nose pressed against yours, he tightens his wrap and lifts you higher, causing you to close any remaining distance as you wrap your legs around his waist. Walking over to the bed, he gently lays you down on the plush bedding. Your arms fling up and over your head, with your hair gracefully spread all around. Reaching up, his hands smooth their way above your head and grab onto your hands, slowly intertwining your fingers together. From there, his kisses trail down to your chin, and to your throat. He smothers you with one kiss after another, before coming back up, just below the lobe of your ear. With your face peeled to the side, and your chest heaving upwards from the denseness of his weight on top, you arch your back and dip your hips low, craving for more of his touch. Whispering into your ear, he unleashes the depth of his braved confession.

“You have no idea….just how much I’ve been wanting you. How many days and nights went by where I thought about you…just you. There’s nothing in my life that I ever wanted more than what I have right before me….pretty girl you should be mine….only mine….and I should be yours.”

Fluttering your eyelids up, growing weak from your shaky breathing and the throbbing tingle that taps your core, there was no way you wanted him to stop, but the thought of h/n came to mind and you gave it your last shot to be mentally strong….despite your heart wanting him all for yourself.

“Hee—Heeseung…..but….what about….m-my sister…?”

Keeping his lips latched onto your neck, he whispers in response. “I like her….” propping himself up, he hooks on the hem of his t-shirt, slowly lifting it up and over his head, revealing his hardened muscles. Flinging it off to the side, he stares down at you with almost a cynical stare, one that was psychotic, but filled with love. “But I love you….”

Gasping at the sight before you, you moan and whimper as you reach up and reaffirm the hold around his neck, bringing him closer to you. Never have you felt such intense love from someone. You have dabbled into the dating life and had a couple of boyfriends since college, but nothing too serious. This….this was something far more crazy….intense….insane even…..but it was a love that you knew that was too good to deny.

Draping your hands down onto his biceps, you arch your back sharply, pressing your breasts against his chest upon feeling his hands traveling low. Swooping under your thighs, he lifts and guides them to wrap around his waist as he rolls the hem of your dress up and coils it around your waist. Hooking his fingers on your panties, he starts ripping them apart. So eager to have you, he couldn’t quite understand anything other than satisfying the hunger he had been feeling since meeting you. He became a beast, a ravishing monster that needed to be tamed, and the only one that could do it, was you. You gasped upon feeling the tugging of him ripping the fabric of your underwear apart, yet were quieted down when he faintly breaks the kiss and places a single finger atop of your lips. “Its okay…..baby, I’m not going to hurt you….I’m just going to feed on you….” Resuming the kiss, he twirls his tongue inside, ever so lovingly. You feel his hands tug on the straps of your dress and pulls them loosely over your shoulders and exposes your breasts to the warmth of his chest as he cradles you in a sweet embrace. Your thighs begin to shake as you rub your fingers up and down his biceps, and moan into his mouth.

Locking your lips in, he delivers a single, sharp buck from his hip, hitting you semi-hard in between your legs. Yelping out of intense pleasure, you release a trailing moan into his mouth as he prevents you from breaking the kiss entirely. Sensing your nerves calming, he delivers another hit from his hip, this time grinding the clothed bulge into your core. You gasp for air upon feeling the mixture of pleasure and friction, causing you to become delirious and lost in the heat of passion. Smirking into your mouth, knowing full well that he was getting you weaker by the second, he delivers a series of repeated dry thrusts that gets you yelling out a trail of gasping moans.

“Ugh! Ugh! Ugh!”

“Yeah?…yeah? Come on baby….” Clenching his jaw, his thrusts become harder. “Show me how pretty you look, as MY girl...my pretty woman..”

You nearly lose your voice as you continue to moan slurred words and incomplete sentences, all starting off with his name. Propelling his weight off, he unbuckles his belt, and removes his jeans. His nude body now fully connects as you remain mostly bare, with only your flirty dress rolled around your waist, leaving you exposed beneath the tatters and loose ends of the fabric. Kneeling between your legs, he remains propped up high and mighty, leaving you merciless beneath his glaring smirk. Taking you by the waist, he drags you closer, and grinds into you as he takes his shaft and strokes it in between your plush folds. Watching as the skin surrounding your slit caresses his shaft, he triggers your body to secrete the hint of slick moisture, gently glazing his member. Chuckling while admitting a dashing smirk, he looks into your eyes directly, giving a harsh and relentless stare. He didn’t look as soft and gentle as he had all this time since you’ve known him. His eyes were much sharper, defined, and narrowed, and he had a dashing yet devious smirk that was much different than the traditionally handsome one he flares off. It was as if he was taken over by something, a hunger that manifested out of the great desire and love he had developed for you, almost immediately after seeing you for the first time. Was it love at first sight? Or were you just everything he had always dreamed of, yet thought too good to be true to exist? Either way, the moment was here, where he finally had you in his arms. Even he, himself, doesn’t know what exactly was coming over him, but that remained irrelevant as he gazed on the magnificent view beneath him. The suppleness of your skin on your breasts, the smoothness of your legs, and the loveliness of your delicate slit, which he could not wait to plunge in.

Licking his lip, his lids grow heavy and for a moment, you somewhat came back to your senses, but it was too late. With his hand firmly gripping your waist, he takes the base of his shaft and slowly begins to enter. You grab onto his hand immediately upon feeling the bulge pushing past your enclosed cavity. Your body hitches up and forward, reacting to the sting of his rather large and lengthy muscle, only for him to drag you back towards him.

“Ah! Wait…..I….” your breaths transition into raging pants from the immense pressure. It had been too long, and you had forgotten that unique and painful sensation of your walls breaching, but with Heeseung, it was ten times more blistering given his thick girth and exaggerated length.

“Shh….its okay baby….I’m right here. I’m going to make you feel good…”

Feeling each inch sliding in, your thighs start to shake, and your pelvis grows numb. The beat of pain starts to disappear and after a few seconds, all you feel is the pressure of your walls separating. Deep inside lays your soft and tender spot, and after looking at seeing how largely endowed he was, he reaches it, as you expected. Your chest deeply heaves and your back arches even more, expanding the volume of your moans to beat off the walls. Your body rolls and curls, causing your hips to surf up and down, gently tapping against his groin and letting him know that you were wanting more. So more much. Your hands move up but could only reach his naval region as he remained on his kneeling position, while you laid restlessly taking in the plunge. Your fingers delicately drag down and tap against his skin, shakily. He lets out another deep chuckle.

“Heh heh…you ready for me?” Trailing his hand across your chest, he firmly takes hold on the side of your neck. Answering him, you nod eagerly, but nervously. Smiling while breathing out unsteady exhales, amidst feeling the pressures of your tight walls hugging his cock, he releases a shaky chuckle. “My woman…”

Thrusting in the remaining bit of his shaft, he pelts himself all the way in. Your eyes jolt wide with a look of pain and slight fear as you gasp out a yelping moan.

“Oh fuck….keep looking at me like that….you’re so……fuck….” He gasps out as he picks up the pace and thrusts harder and deeper. Faster and faster, he expands the horizon of his sight as he views your facial expression, the movement of your breasts bouncing at high velocity, and how his cock was violating your womanhood. Just as much he was enjoying it, so were you. Seeing how monstrous he was in fucking you, had only thrilled you. The level of intimidation of his manhood and abrasiveness, all accompanying his will to please you, and himself, became the best feeling in the world that you could ever experience. Shifting your grip, you grab onto the blankets to each side of your face and moaned out every inch of ecstasy that he gave. Beating it into you, his cock throbs and pulsates, causing him to fuck you even faster and deeper. This man, your younger sister’s boyfriend, was giving it to you so good, you didn’t want it to end. At that moment, you didn’t care about the outcome of all this, it felt too good to give it up, the more he plunged in, the more you screamed out his name. He went on, and on, and on.

“Ugh! He-Heeseung!”

“Fuck…..” With his hand still maintaining a side grip on your neck, his thumb swipes up and down the center of your throat as he continues his merciless thrusts. “Oh fuck…fuck fuck fuck…..” he gasped out in whispering groans. “You’re so fucking perfect….I could fuck you forever……”

Going in even faster and harder, your body becomes a blur of your tone and complexion as it succumbs to his aggressive thrusting, causing you to bounce relentlessly up and down against the bedspread. Your head pins down on the pillow as he keeps you steady with his hold, using it as leverage to bring you in each time he thrusts back inside.

“Oh my God…!!” You gasp out in a smoldering tone, causing him to twitch inside as he heard the pleasures within your voice. The moment you felt the knot snap, you had the entire penetrating area soaked as you continuously gush out the pleasures of your orgasm. Watching as his cock glistens in between his thrusts, he growls out your name. His hand twitches its grip, and you feel his fingers faintly digging into your skin. Shifting his hold, his hand moves upwards, caressing your cheek, while his thumb swipes over your lips as you catch your breath. Releasing his essence, he remains buried inside and pumps every ounce of his hard labor inside of you. Sliding out, he exits out of your cavity, leading out a trail of his cum to not only seep and pool inside your walls, but to also decorate the exterior of your sex as he spills his seeds on your clit.

Leaning into a crawling stance above your tired and weakened form, he trails the tip of his nose along your throat and up to your chin. Embracing you in a passionate kiss, he rests his body next to you and pulls you in to a tight hug, leaving small kisses along your helix while he simultaneously tucks your hair behind it. Caressing your face with his fingers, he continues to show every ounce of his love, even after displaying his vigored performance in filling you with it. After catching your breaths, you broke the ice, even though you were enjoying the soft silence.

“….What happens now?....”

Heeseung remained aloof. He knew what he wanted, and nothing, even your eighteen-year-old sister, wasn’t going to keep him from keeping you. Hugging you tightly, whispers as he buries his face into your hair.

“What’s going to happen….is you continue to be mine, and leave everything else to me. I’ll deal with H/N. Just stay here and be mine…and only mine.”

You turn your face half way to flare your side profile at him. “Promise you’re going to be nice and go easy on her?”

“Why wouldn’t I be nice? I’ll be as nice as I can about it, and to her. But I’m always going to be nicer to you.” Leaning into your ear once more, he whispers. “Because I may like your sister….but I love you.”

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The Sun Sets With You

Chapter Four: The Foundation of Growth

Summary: A simple yet despondent farm life suddenly sparks with new hope when an unusual traveler makes your town his latest stop and brings with him intriguing and promising viewpoints and no one to share them with. Until he meets you.

Pairing: Ezra Prospect x f!Reader

Rating: M

Warnings: Silas is officially his own warning! Death of a parent, depressive undertones, grief, food, pls lmk if I missed any!

W/C: 3.3k

A/N: This one is loaded with feelings guys, I didn't mean for it to be so heavy handed in the grief area, but I hope the conversation Ezra has with Reader offsets that. I definitely got into my own feelings about loss with this one, so I'm really sorry in advance if it's too much to handle. Read at your own risk, I've said it before, this story is not for everyone, always take care of yourself first & foremost lovelies. I've got some fluff coming up to make up for this one! I'm still building the plot you guys, I hope you're still with me!

Series Masterlist || Main Masterlist || Taglist Form

Chapter Three || Chapter Five

~MAY THIRD OF EIGHTEEN SIXTY-SEVEN~

Two weeks have since passed; Pa and Ezra had tediously worked the fields, sowed the seeds with care, and the fruition of all their work thus far has resulted in the small sprouts now growing from the Earth. ‘One of Mother Nature’s greatest gifts’, Ezra had said once while you gazed upon the rows of leaflets. Rebirth, growth, new beginnings. You find yourself envying the fresh buds, wishing to crawl into the dirt and begin again as well.

The shop is quiet today. Since you chased away the older women looking to learn more about Ezra Prospect, you haven’t heard a peep since. Quite surprising, though you count your blessings and hope the silence will hold, if only for a moment longer. The children play in the road with the stray town dog and you catch yourself giggling as you watch them. Such innocence in their youth. You only hope life treats them kinder than it had to you.

The shop bell dinging pulls you out of your thoughts and you stand straighter to greet the customer. Lucille Jones enters, without the overbearing presence of her mother – a shock in and of itself. She walks with her hands entwined in front of her, her head lowered some, and blonde ringlets of hair fall forward to frame her face, but she still carries a gentle smile on her face as she looks up at you.

As much as you pitied the outcome of your own life, you could not help but pity Lucille’s tenfold. Her father had fought and perished in the war, the only person to have shown her love and caring, and she was now left with her mother, who was ready to practically pawn her off to the next richest man to come through town.

Were it not for her mother’s meddling, you know the two of you would be great friends. She may be the only other person in this town who can empathize with your despondency; her dreams, likely, have been ripped from her as well. Though, it makes the curiosity spark within you as you wonder why exactly she has shown up in the shop so suddenly and without her mother.

“Hello, Lucille. It’s nice to see you,” you say politely. She nods in return. Timid girl. “May I interest you in anything? I’ve concocted a new healing agent to help with the pesky bug bites during the summer,” you offer gently.

“I-I’ve…” She squeaks. You cock your head slightly at her.

“Lucille, what has your nerves so rattled?”

“I’ve come as a favor to my mother. And Mrs. Foster and Mrs. McKenna.”

She faces you head on now, her soft voice filled with determination to complete her mission, yet her eyes, filled with regret, betray her. You raise your eyebrows in contempt and sigh deeply, and upon seeing your reaction, Lucille’s desire to help her mother gossip dissipates. She quickly steps forward, the heels of her white boots clacking against the wooden floors and the skirts of her pink dress flowing behind her.

“I’m so sorry, I did not wish to come and gossip. It is not my desire. My mother… She would not rest until I agreed to come here,” she laments, the quiver in her voice proving to you that she truly meant no harm. “I will pass on the news that you will speak to no one. Forgive me,” she says, her head hanging lower now than at the start of this conversation as she turns to walk away.

“Wait,” you call out. She stops in her tracks, but does not turn to face you again. You walk around the counter to her position. “Lucille… Why do you follow what your mother commands of you?” You ask softly.

“I…” She looks up in your eyes, tears forming in her own and you swear you feel a string in your heart snap at the sight. “I have no choice.”

“Yes, you do. You can choose to leave all this behind, leave this town and its capability to drain the life from you. You do have a choice for how you desire to live your life.”

You hold her by her shoulders as you speak and you realize you are sharing advice with her that could very well be said to your own face. You know it is not a possibility for you, but if you were able to help Lucille leave town and save her from feeling the same hopelessness as you, a part of you would be freed as well, knowing she will have been able to move on to better things.

She stares at you, the tears in her eyes now dried up and you see a small spark of hope in them, but before you can speak more to nurture that spark into a larger flame, the shop bell dings again. Based on the dark figure in your peripheral, the stomp of large, gaudy boots walking in, the heady scent of cheap cologne filling your nostrils, you know exactly who it is.

Lucille looks at the man first and you remove your hands from her shoulders, taking a step back and inhaling a deep breath, nearly choking on the fragrance now overpowering the shop.

“Hello, Mr. Taylor,” Lucille greets, bowing her head slightly.

“Hiya sweetheart,” he responds in a predatory voice and you snap your head in his direction.

“How can I help you, Silas?” You ask quickly before he can intimidate poor Lucille.

“I heard you’ve got some queer working on the farm now,” he chuckles.

“Do not call him that,” you bite and Silas immediately stops laughing.

“Darlin’,” he takes a step toward you and Lucille backs away against the shop wall. “Don’t tell me you have befriended him. You’re too good for the likes of a freak.”

“You don’t know him,” you reply, keeping your head held high with determination, but you instinctually flinch when Silas barks out a laugh.

“And you do?!” He says, grinning wickedly. “For your sake, honey, I truly hope not.”

“What is your meaning, Silas? He works on my farm, it is only natural that I will, and have, come to know him.”

“Perhaps,” he says, his voice dropping to a lower, more aggressive, octave. “Just be aware of the consequences if you come to know him as more than the simple farmhand he is.”

You wish to spit in his face, to continue defending Ezra, yet the instincts within you beg for you to stop. Though you’ve never been one to cower at Silas and his schemes, you’ve also never seen him as he is before you. Crazed, animalistic, frightening. You’re unsure of what he truly is capable of and you would hate for now to be the time to learn.

Despite the resolute expression you attempt to hold, your eyes must shine with the light fear he managed to instill in you with his threat because he flashes a satisfied smirk, a laugh escaping his flared nostrils as he backs away from you. He turns on his heels and faces Lucille again, huffing a goodbye to her and glancing over his shoulder at you before walking out.

“Are you all right?” Lucille asks softly. You only nod in return. “That man is…” She scoffs, understanding how loathsome he is.

“Not a man. A beast.”

~MAY FIFTH OF EIGHTEEN SIXTY-SEVEN~

As you exit the house, ready to meet Ezra at the place you now share together, you reach up to grab an apple from the tree for yourself and throw it in your bag along with your book. You take a step away then halt just as quickly. You consider Ezra, and smile to yourself as you reach up again to grab another apple from the branch, setting it gently inside your bag.

As you approach the oak, you see Ezra standing near the edge of the river, his hands clasped behind his back and head held high. He seems to be enjoying the scenery and you try to lighten your steps so as to not draw him from his serene moment, but the grass crunches under your boots as you walk, regardless of how careful you are, and Ezra turns his head in the direction of the noise, smiling brightly once he sees you.

“Dear Sunflower, I was afraid you would not show today,” he says as he turns his whole body to face you.

“My apologies,” you catch your lip in between your teeth, hiding the amused grin forming on your face, your heart skipping a beat at the knowledge that he had been waiting for your arrival. You dig in your bag in search of the apple you plucked specially for him. “A gift for keeping you waiting,” you say and hold the bright, red fruit out to him.

“Sunflower,” he gasps softly, as though you had just handed him a precious gem. “Thank you. A sweet and kind gesture from someone as equally generous; it will not be forgotten.”

You nod once while you bite the inside of your cheeks. What has gotten you so giddy? He merely gave his thanks for your offering, but the smile on his face, his eyes searching yours to clue him in on what has you so affected, makes a schoolgirl-ish giggle escaping your throat.

You reach for your own apple and drop your bag down in the grass, closer to the tree, and you step closer to the river, kneeling down and carefully dipping the apple into the cool stream to wash the skin. Ezra kneels down beside you and follows your lead.

“These are from the tree by the house. The last tree I was able to plant with my mother before she-”

You pause, immediately feeling your throat constrict and halting any further words from falling from your lips. You’ve not spoken so carefree of your mother to anyone, and the suddenness of your desire to do so catches you off guard. Though you have gotten to know Ezra as more than an acquaintance, the truth of the matter was he is still a stranger to you.

You sense the energy shift around you, and you bite your tongue in penance for turning such a peaceful time into an unpleasant one. Ezra stops washing his apple and leans up straight again while you keep your hands under the cold water, scared to look into his eyes and see judgement.

“Sunflower,” he calls and you startle slightly. After a moment of silence, he speaks again. “If you were to wash that fruit any longer, I’m afraid it may lose its red complexion and turn into a shade of white.”

You cannot help the awkward chuckle that falls from your mouth and you lean up straight as well, still avoiding his gaze as you dry the apple with your apron. Aside from the running water next to you, the air is silent, neither of you speaking a word.

You continue drying the apple, turning it over and over in the cloth around your waist, even though you’re sure there are no water droplets remaining. Suddenly, a loud chomp is heard and your eyes snap up to the offending noise to see Ezra bringing the apple away from his lips, and the two of you break out into gentle laughter.

“Sunflower,” he begins after swallowing the piece of fruit in his mouth. “This is truly the sweetest apple I’ve ever bitten into, and I wholeheartedly believe it is because you and your dear mother were the ones to nurture the tree that grew it.”

The smile that remained on your face from your laughter slowly falls as you remember the day your mother suggested you plant the tree from a seed she accidentally bit into. You can recall her giggles as she grabbed you by the hand and pulled you outside, instructing you to grab the small shovel that was laid by the house while she held the seed in her closed fist.

Pa had said it would not take, chuckling and shaking his head as your mother shooed him away, reprimanding him for cursing the seedling before it had a chance to grow. And, with much love and dedication that your mother insisted on carrying out together, the small tree grew, and soon after, sprouted the shiny, red globes.

“I… I apologize for the sudden change of atmosphere, Ezra,” you say quietly, glancing up at him sheepishly and, to your surprise, are met with a gentle smile of understanding across his face.

“Please do not apologize for reminiscing upon your loved one. It is a hobby I frequently partake in. The memories… They are what keep them alive. No longer with us in the physical sense, yet they live in the grass, in the rivers. In the trees.”

“Like the Green?” You ask shyly as you pick at the stem of your apple.

“Yes. They are born again, just in a different form, but always here to remind you of life. Much like the apple tree is a reminder of your mother.”

You wonder to yourself if Ezra has been a victim of loss as well. The way he speaks of it seems as though he talks from experience, but you do not dare ask. As uncomfortable as it can be for you to speak about your mother, you’d hate to bring that discomfort to him as well. Yet… He speaks so openly, so calmly, that you feel yourself longing to open up.

“Perhaps if I dream of the Green, I would see my mother again,” you say under your breath, feeling the tears that have so long desired to flow build in your eyes with an unbearable pressure.

“You do not need to wait until your dreams, dear Sunflower. You only need to look around at the life surrounding you to know she is here. Close your eyes and she will appear.”

You only have the strength to nod, the lump stuck in your throat as thick as Pa’s dreadful grits he so enjoys making during the winter. A small laugh bubbles over as you remember the way your mother put up the facade of enjoying his grits only to empty them in a bucket to be fed to the cows at a later time.

You look back up at Ezra and he smiles, his eyes shining with compassion, no hint of judgement or scrutiny to be found, and the lump in your throat vanishes, comfort radiating from his person onto you like a warm, wool blanket.

“Would…” You hesitate, but an overwhelming urge to share with Ezra commands you to continue. “Would you like to see her?”

“I would love to,” he nods gently.

You smile softly, leaving your apple to rest in your lap while you carefully pull at the chain around your neck until the small locket emerges from underneath your blouse. You scoot closer to Ezra and he mimics your movement, leaning closer to you as well and you recognize that this is the first time he has been in such close proximity to you.

You shove the tip of your fingernail between the crevice of the locket until it pops open, revealing the black and white photograph of your mother that you yourself have not taken the opportunity to look at in far too long. The length of the chain is still too short for Ezra to get a proper look, so he leans in closer, your heads mere inches apart.

You feel your pulse thumping against your chest, the vein in your neck throbbing as you feel the heat emanating from him. He smells of cedarwood and the hay bed he sleeps on, a light scent of sweat from working the fields, and something almost sweet, a unique aroma to be found only on his person and no one else.

“She is very beautiful, Sunflower. It is as plain as the nose on my face that you are her daughter,” he compliments, backing away from you slowly and you giggle softly as you place the locket back into your blouse. “What is her name?”

“Emma,” you smile genuinely, for once feeling not one ounce of sadness as you say her name aloud.

“Emma. She is now the sun, moon, and stars that shine down on you, Sunflower.”

You smile once again and nod as you place your hand on your chest, feeling the cool metal press against the warm skin covering your sternum. You close your eyes and let the sun’s rays warm your cheeks as you take a deep breath, heeding Ezra’s thoughtful words and imagining that your mother is, indeed, the sun kissing your face.

“Thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts, Ezra,” you say after a beat of prolonged silence. As you look over at him, you see his head lowering, too, as if he had mimicked your action and let the warmth of the sun fall on his face as well.

“You have no need to thank me, dear one. I am elated you deemed me worthy to share your thoughts with. If you ever desire to share again, please know I am here,” he says softly as he smiles.

“You are a very good friend, Ezra. I am happy to know you.”

“And I, you.”

You look down at your lap to your forgotten apple, raising it to your mouth to take a bite and Ezra resumes eating his as well. Once you’ve both bitten down to the core, you both toss them into the river and you stand up, allowing the blood to circulate through your legs again before heading over to the tree.

You bend over to collect your bag along the way and your book falls from the opening as you stand straight. Before you are able to bend down to grab it, Ezra is already there, lifting it in his hands while he reads the cover.

“‘Alice’s Adventures In Wonderland’?” He smiles quizzically.

“I understand it is for children, but I quite enjoy the adventure and wonder of it,” you say, smiling from embarrassment.

“I do not judge what a young lady chooses to read in her spare time, Sunflower,” he grins as he hands the book to you. “I have yet to read this one. Will you read it aloud for me?”

“Yes,” you nod. “If you’d like.”

You both sit down in the grass, leaning your backs against the trunk of the oak tree as you find the page you last left off. The scene of Alice’s trial has Ezra suddenly captivated as to what caused Alice to be put on trial, unfairly it seemed. You do your best to explain, which only produces more questions from Ezra.

You giggle at his frustration over the treatment of this poor girl and decide to start the book over for Ezra to follow along, a genuine happiness washing over you at the thought of reading this story to Ezra for the weeks to come. He leans in closer, as though the distance you had between you previously was too far for him to hear you and you stumble over your words slightly.

You still do not understand this feeling overcoming you; the only thing you do understand is that you do not feel the need to place a guard around yourself as you do with the others in town. You want to share with Ezra, you feel comfortable enough with him already, though he has only been here for two weeks.

Yet, you feel as though you know him better than most around you and you feel that he understands you better than even your Pa. It frightens you, yet you have no desire to run from it, but rather towards it. A new path you find yourself carving into your mind.

Chapter Three || Chapter Five

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Welcome Home | Baekhyun x Reader

Hello! This is my first fic on tumblr! It’s just a simple soldier!baekhyun x wife!reader so enjoy cuties~

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Waiting for Baekhyun to get home was total agony. Every day for a year and a half felt like an eternity. Night and day blended together into a mix of weeks as you waited for him to come back.

  The worst part of your husband leaving was the fact that you had found out you were pregnant two months in. Both Baekhyun and yourself were devastated that he wouldn’t be there for the birth of your first child. Even as time went on, the heartache never seemed to disappear.

  Your daughter looked like him a lot, sometimes it hurt to look. Her eyes were always wide and full of innocence, not knowing the world around her as you did. Her smile was Baekhyun’s, the cutest little curl of her lips resembled the brightness of your husband’s greatly.

  Now the time has come, the agonizing eighteen months had ended and the plane was set to land momentarily. You stood in a crowd of thousands of people, all holding banners and signs for their loved ones. The airport was full of people, most gathered at the three designated terminals for returning veterans. Haneul was sleeping soundlessly against your chest, her body snuggled warmly in your arms while you sat on a bench, the terminal in full view between the crowds.

  The PA clicked on and the airport speakers blasted the voice of a woman relaying plane delay messages, making your heart jump when Baekhyun’s plane was mentioned for being delayed. Sighing, you stood up and gathered your purse, walking to the nearest airport restaurant and plopping down in a chair. The clock on the bar read 6:40pm, another four hours until the scheduled arrival time.

The waitress at the small airport diner was sweet and brought a high chair over for Haneul to nap in, and through in some fries on the house. As the time got closer to close, she began visiting more frequently, bits and pieces of her life fleeting into your memory.

  Her name was Kim Yeonghe, she was a widow with three kids and never wanted to remarry even at her young age. Her husband never returned, he was injured while serving on his tour. She told you about her three boys and their rowdy behavior in their youth, and how they had now grown and matured into the men their father would have been proud of. She discussed how hard it was, the widow’s life, and how much stress she went through without her husband.

“I never once thought about another marriage. I knew that in my heart, I would never have another Junmyeon. He was my world, and I wouldn’t have left his memory for any man alive.”

  By the time Yeonghe had to nicely kick you out for close, it was 9:45pm. The plane that hopefully carried Baekhyun to safety wasn’t supposed to land for another hour, and you have checked your phone for regular updates.

  Haneul has finally woken from her evening nap and was now demanding to be fed. Sighing, you prepared the small travel bottle and fed your daughter, finding yourself on the same bench you had sat on only hours ago.

 The minutes merged into hours before you knew you’d begun to dose off, Haneul once again snuggled into your embrace. The excited shriek of a passerby woke you up quickly to see what the commotion was. The plane had finally landed.

 Getting up quickly, you grabbed everything that was yours and marched forwards towards the terminal, determined to be able to see the soldiers even with your short height. Haneul stirred and blinked her brown eyes at your (e/c) ones and craned her neck to look around. You laughed at your baby’s antics.

“Haneul, it’s time for you to meet your daddy.”

 At the mention of her father, Haneul turned and let out a happy screech, clapping her hands together. You giggled and kissed her forehead.

“Appa?”

“Yes, Appa.”

 She cooed and then gummed contentedly on her first, peeking over your shoulder at the crowd. The minutes went tortuously slow, looking out the window at the giant aircraft only made it worse.

 Finally, the first few men carrying large camp duffel bags appeared at the gate, all wearing the same tired expression. As more began to pour in, people let out happy cries when they saw the face of their friends and family. Little children, husbands, wives and parents alike all sprinted to greet their veterans, tears spilling down their cheeks. It was truly a happy sight, until the numbers of soldiers began to lessen.

 After the last few stragglers passed through the terminal gates, cries of anguish began to ring out. Those who had not found their loved ones were put in states of sorrow, tears running down their cheeks for different reasons. You were one of these people.

  Upon not seeing Baekhyun emerge with the crowds, dread crept into your heart. Frantically looking around through the crowd didn’t help your anxiety, it only made it worse. Everywhere you looked was another happy face, and your mind began setting in on your reality. Were you destined to be like Yeonghe? A widow? Never to see her husband again?

  Tears pricked at your eyes, Haneul seemed to notice. Her own tears started to fall and you both cried together. Looks of pity were cast in your direction, nobody knowing what to say.

  Sobs racked your body as you sunk to the ground, Haneul’s hands fisted tightly in your shirt.

“Appa!” She cried pitfully.

“Baekhyun…” You sobbed loudly over and over.

  You’d never see his smile again, the way his eyes sparkled when he smiled. You wouldn’t hear his voice or his laugh again. Worst of all, he would never get to meet his daughter, his pride and joy.

  Baekhyun’s name became a mantra on your lips, but slowly your voice quieted to a quivering whisper, the exhaustion hitting in.

“(Y/N)!!!! (Y/N)?”

  You sat up straight, looking around your surroundings. You’d heard Baekhyun’s voice, surely it hadn’t been your imagination?

“Baekhyun? BAEKHYUN?”

  You turned around and there he was. He stood tall in his uniform, duffle thrown to the ground in the middle of the airport hallway. He smiled brilliantly at you before taking off full sprint. The impact of Baekhyun’s body on your own nearly made you fall over, but there he was, keeping you and Haneul safe in his arms.

  He was really there; your Baekhyun was truly back for you, for your budding family. The tears flowed freely once more, words were quiet reassurances between you two.

“I’ve missed you so much, I prayed you’d come back to me.”

“I could never leave you baby, you’re my home, my life.”

“I love you Baek.”

  He smiled and pulled away, finally noticing the small form of his daughter that he didn’t see upon his initial hug. Baekhyun was awestruck, the tiny bundle in your arms had him speechless. Haneul studied Baekhyun’s face, reaching out and putting her little hand on his cheek before smiling.

  Baekhyun smiled back at her, tears in his eyes. Slowly, he scooped Haneul out of your arms and held her close to his chest, arms protectively around her small form. You were silently watching your husband as he cried, stroking Haneul’s small head with his big hand.

“Appa?”

 She looked at him expectantly, as if she didn’t already know the answer to her question. He smiled through the tears at her, his heart already completely in love with his daughter.

“Yes Haneul, Appa is here.”

  The little girl smiled at Baekhyun before motioning to you with her tiny fist.

“Eomma?”

 You smiled and hiccuped, walking closer and capturing your family in another tight hug. Baekhyun moved Haneul to his hip, circling his arm around your waist and burying his face in your hair.

“Yes darling, Eomma’s here.”

Industry Guidelines

Fandom: Shinee

Pairing: Jongtae

Genre: Angst

Length - 6.5k

Rating: T+

Warnings: Self acceptance issues, religious conflict

Notes: Jongtae are too precious and while this is a one shot, more Jongtae will be coming in the future

Enjoy, and share if you do!

-

There are rules.

That's all Taemin has to say about any of it, at least. Rules about that unspoken thing that everyone in the industry lives with; the one that doesn't call itself out but instead lays flatly against his feet as he treads on it.

That terrain is unexplored, but not unknown – a mystery to him as much as it is to spectators. It's a not-entirely-well-kept secret, something to know about but not speak of.

Taemin sees it sometimes, this big secret that's kept under wraps. He sees it with Kibum and Minho – he smiles at them in the mornings as they get walk out of the same bedroom, hair tousled and glowing smiles. He hears it at night in shaking bed posts and quickening breath between small breadths of drywall; he's heard the sounds for years – he's just… never talked about it, because that's one of the rules. But, he's known .

For years .

If he's not busy, building a career and distilling his talents, he'll catch a glimpse and wonder what it would be like. What being himself might mean in an industry that likes to trample the unconventional.

He's almost too caught up in his dance practice to want it, to want to be able to say that he wants the slice of life that his bandmates have been able to carve out for themselves. But then again, the music can't always out-yell the sound of his thoughts.

He's dancing too hard to notice it now, but when he can't sleep, he can't help but think that there's something wrong.

He doesn't know if it’s in himself, or the world, but it's wrong and it leaves a bitter taste in the morning.

-

Sixty-six, sixty-seven, sixty-eight.

He's staring at the wall, now, in the silence of his room and counts the rise and fall of Jonghyun's breath. The steady stream of life that he'd grown used to now, a background noise as comforting as a soft fan or the hum of a street light.

Jonghyun finally fell asleep, just before two in the morning – the first time in months he was able to find that evasive off switch to his brain.

Tortured genius, Taemin thinks, rolling over in his bed. He doesn't have the same sort of excuse, he reasons out in the dark, staring at the spot he knows Jonghyun is in the pitch-blackness.

He's trying to do anything but think about things that make his knuckles white with envy. Where is his sleep, now that his body aches and his mind needs peace?

Probably with Jonghyun, because seventy-eight, seventy-nine, eighty , and he's surely dreaming by now, stealing what was left of Taemin's willpower to shut the fuck up and get some rest . He can't be mad, but he's not very thrilled with his situation either.

Taemin sighs in frustration, a ball of anger hanging in his stomach as he practically feels the hours pass him by – the way his memory started to play, screens behind his eyes turned into movies that keep him awake and vividly aware .

It's clear as day sometimes, when the lights are dim enough, like pictures on a film roll. Like it is now, when his eyelashes flutter open and observe the nothingness of two in the morning and he returns to feigning sleep.

The thoughts – those memories that rattle around late at night– are of Jonghyun. They're all about  Jonghyun and him and occasionally there’s mix of oddly attractive men he sometimes gets a good glance at (though mostly it's just his bandmate).

It's Jonghyun – his hair fucked up late after a real night of sleep, twisted in ways that look unflattering and entirely too much like I just got fucked . The way his shirt worked its way off him in his troubled slumber, or how warm his body is when he slips behind Taemin to hug him.

Then, it’s way he sometimes hears his breath come too fast, late at night when the A/C kicks on. Too shaky and breathy and desperately quiet in the middle of nights, when Taemin has been silent for long enough to be mistaken for sleep...

The reminder of sexuality is also something Taemin's learned to live with – there's only so many times a man can jerk off before someone walks in on it, after all. It happens, and Taemin's caught everyone with their hands down their fronts one time or another (or a half dozen other times, in some cases).

But, when it's Jonghyun…

He could only really think of how he really needed to sleep instead of think of –

No, he's not… not like that . He's their youngest, their makn a e , the one who was supposed to be pure and sweet and innocent and everything he wishes he was. He's what his image was shaped into – that was supposed to be him, and he was supposed to be happy with fame and his life and himself.

Why wasn't that the case, then? Why wasn't there a mold for him to cast his soul in so that it matched what his body, his fame, was?

He knows his soul best and it cringes at the way he smiles on TV, the way he talks, walks, sings, dances – the way it all feels like a complex lie that he built all on his own, no company assistance needed (though, possibly, maybe it was aided by the company). It felt like a shell already drained of its yolk, shiny and perfect but gutted for display for Easter.

Taemin bit back a hitch in his breath, that way you do when trying not to wake someone – not wake a roommate.

His soul cringes at all the things he does and all the things he says – or doesn't say, doesn't do when his fingers twitch to follow the curve of his own body, down, down, down –

Stop.

His hands always – usually – do.

There it was, again like a tireless lover that's never been satisfied: the way his body doesn't like to stay on the same page as his principles, the doctrines of his faith. His body was neither his lover or his friend and he wondered why he was cursed with it at all when all it did was give him away.

But then, there was the lack of obedience that also stayed within him, a side to the multi-faced coin of his life. It was the pestering, enduring idea that his ideology was– was fucked up. It was a thought that he brushed off every time he brought it up.

He often cursed his position in the band, the kid who debuted at fourteen, and how that image just stuck – he feels as bad about every awkward boner growing up as he does now, basically an adult who’s never been allowed those sort of thoughts.

And then there’s the way his eyes follow his hyung's hips as he walks the halls -- it’s not right, right? How he watches him too deeply in the morning when he wakes him in the morning, or passes him on stage, and there’s a thump in his chest like getting kicked by a horse.

It’s not right and he doesn’t dwell but then he thinks how badly, how strongly he wants to think that it could be okay. That if it were ever okay, ever, to think like he does, then it might be okay for him and that just once, it would be right.

It’s not easy, though. There’s no cure to impurity and when Jonghyun dances and smiles and brings him into his arms, or how he sings in the shower like he's composing the next masterpiece on their album, it almost hurts.

Taemin is eighteen. He's a man, and he's living with four other boys and god damn it if he's not in the prime of his sexuality, but… but he just feels bad . Bad and rotten like apples left untouched (maybe quite literally, the thought comes and goes) and everything else horrible that the world seems to smother him in with his age, with his gender, with his religion or the eye of the press.

What a joke it must be when he wakes up, hard and bluntly aware of every inch of fabric on his skin, of the draft in the room from the open door and the fact that Jonghyun is getting dressed just behind his back.

He's singing again, humming a tune from one of the lyrics he's working on. It's addictive – not the melody he hums but the way he does it.

That sort of passion and energy isn't easy to stand up against; rather, it’s like instinct to get swept up in it and never want to let go. Taemin wants to be pulled in, but instinct drives his feet into the sand, and the erosion does nothing to soften his determination.

Jonghyun is many things, but he is never ashamed of himself. Taemin hears the clarity and command of his whispering singing and he tries not to think about what comes after.

-

A cold shower and shaking hands are often where he finds himself.

-

Taemin catches an eyeful of lyrics every so often – stray paper here on the table or in the kitchen or floating around under his bed.

This time, he picks up the discarded paper and when he reads the lyrics scribbled on the scrunched parchment, his stomach knots. He looks for a second and by the next, he's torn it apart and crumpled it as much as possible.

Those lyrics, all sex and yearning and so obviously written about girls. About normality.

Taemin sulks all day and only feels whole once the dance room is his and his alone.

-

Jonghyun's girlfriend is nice. Her smile is free and so are her hands, always on his back or shoulders or drifting and exploring.

Taemin has that bitter feeling all the time, now.

-

Taemin resents Jonghyun's lyrics – even once he breaks up with her, Jonghyun can't seem to shake the way he wrote about how he felt about her.

It's hard for Taemin to sing about her and not feel broken.

-

He hates the romantic feelings worse than the sexual ones – sex was biology, was breathing and blood flow and the need to touch and be touched. The romance, the way he wanted to simply be with Jonghyun, dreaming of his smile and his voice and how good he was – that was not biology. That was chemistry.

He didn't want chemistry if it justified loving someone off limits.

-

He's eighteen and his career has kept him from many things, including the luxury of admitting to himself that he was in love with his friend. With a boy.

Also, maybe, it kept him away from romantic encounters that a lot of boys have had by this time.

There was a drunk encounter, and she was willing and he wasn’t but they still tried. That was last year and it was a mistake. No one knew and thank god they didn’t, he wouldn’t have an explanation for it otherwise.

It's embarrassing but he shrugs it off, stays in his corner and concentrates on doing his best in his craft -- life without sex wasn’t too bad if he worked hard on his career, on dacing, and that is what he started out in SM to do, after all.

It's kept him painfully confined to work and himself alone. Living with four other boys without a moment of privacy, he's never felt more isolated (even when they're taking care of their favorite maknae, checking in on him when he seems not quite right. Maybe his smile falters and maybe they're concerned, but he'll smile again and say that it's exhaustion and mental energy and he's actually “doing very well.”)

He's their little brother and he's utterly convincing.

It's embarrassing and he pretends it's not.

-

The company encourages dating within the ranks. Idols dating idols is easy to control, and it's easy to drive a private life in an industry that makes idol's time and attention worth more than gold.

Taemin has been told that if he were to date, it should be in the company. Girls from Girls Generation or Red Velvet or f(x). Obviously, it would have to be after his nineteenth birthday, but that he was assured was a right he had.

Taemin never does this. He's been asked out more times than he cares to count.

-

Taemin comes home late at night with that never-ending ache in his limbs that demand a hot shower. Dance is hell when it comes to deadlines, but he bears it in shaking thighs the best he can and when he’s done.

Minho and Kibum are at it – it's breathy and achingly loud and Taemin tunes it out when it gets too noisy, the way his friends make each other feel… good.

That's what it was supposed to be, right? Good? He's technically nineteen now but he suddenly feels twelve all over again. (Flashes from last year and that one encounter come to mind and absolutely none of it felt good, even the kisses.)

His shower turns cold after all, and his ears are drowning out more than just the moaning coming from down the hall.

-

Jonghyun slips into Taemin's bed. It's midnight and Taemin was just talking to him about the video game they just bought, how he thought it was too easy and that they needed to get a new one and then he slips into bed and suddenly Taemin is forced to think about how much he loves the man pulling him into a warm, engulfing embrace.

“Hyung?”

“I'm tired.”

Sometimes, Jonghyun can sleep if he's next to Taemin. It's a good arrangement, because Taemin loves to share a bed. It feels less engulfing with Jonghyun there.

“Then sleep,” Taemin whispers, ignoring the best he can the way Jonghyun's lips are pressed against the crook of his neck. Jonghyun sighs, entangling his arms around Taemin's waist and scrunching his hand up in the flannel of his sleep shirt.

“Thanks, I really need it.”

Taemin doesn't mind. He doesn't sleep, though.

-

His hyung is shorter than him and he loves it, sometimes. Hugs are cozier and they fit just right. He takes up just the right amount of space in the car that they can fall asleep on each other and it’s the most perfect thing, in Taemin’s mind.

But then, when Jonghyun's hand is on his thigh, idling in the most frustrating and embarrassing way for Taemin, he suddenly feels bigger than life.

-

“Again, now this time breathe in fully and then let it out slowly,” Jonghyun instructs. “Focus on this and you’ll have longer periods of time where you can sing on one breath.”

Taemin's breath wavers, that nervous way that often found its way into his speaking when he was younger.

Jonghyun is behind him, hands encasing his stomach in a way that Taemin couldn't stand. He pressed harder, fingers just below his sternum. “Breathe in, I can tell you're not quite getting all the depth that you need to hold these notes. You need to work on this, especially.”

Taemin tries again, but he knows he's not as good as he should be at this point in their career. He's better, but he's nowhere near where he feels he should be. After all, he's been told this before.

It seems like a waste of time – of the energy Jonghyun gives him however many times a week.

“Hey, are you okay?” Jonghyun's tone is professional, but a note of deep concern follows through his question.

“Yes?”

“Are you sure, you're shaking?”

Taemin gets his body under control immediately – show business has taught him something useful.

“Of course, hyung. I'm just really tired, schedules are long.”

Jonghyun's hands – his entire presence, just behind him and just out of reach – departs and now they're sitting again, each on their own bed. Taemin's legs cross and he teeters just on the edge of his mattress, a perfect balance of what he hopes is composure and ease.

They practice in their room only when the others are out and Jonghyun insisted it was only because it was more comfortable, though he knows it was because no one would hear Taemin. It was for Taemin's comfort as much as it was for the ears of anyone who happened to be near by.

Jonghyun stares at him, an undertone of… something Taemin can't place. Something, painting his features solemn and more contemplative than Taemin would feel comfortable being at the receiving end of.

“… ah, Jjong? Hyung?”

He's staring and Taemin can feel his neck warm. It spreads, slowly, a fire fanned on by the way Jonghyun's expression turns soft and intense and…

He smirks, rolling his eyes. “You're staring at me. You in love?”

“Um, you're staring at me first , hyung,” and their tone is thinly humorous – thinly anything but that smoldering feeling that Taemin wonders if Jonghyun can feel too. Something about the word love doesn't sound like a question – but then again, Taemin knows he's projecting, knows what wishful thinking is and that he's done enough of it for a lifetime.

Jonghyun rolls his eyes again, and he gets up to lay on Taemin's bed. “Lay with me and talk about video games, I'm bored and I really can't imagine doing anything else.”

“No more lessons? Am I still that bad that you'd give up?”

Jonghyun snorts, moving. “You were never bad. Lacking confidence, yes, but not bad.”

They retire that conversation silently, mutually.

Taemin puts some space between them and they're off again, that steady stream of conversation flowing from them so easily that it might feel natural to Taemin to stay at this distance.

Then Jonghyun grabs his hands and Taemin wishes he could say something. His throat closes up, too dry, and suddenly, Jonghyun is threading their fingers together in the silence.

-

It‘s a crush and it's made Taemin wonder, just what does it mean? Is he gay if he only likes one man?

That one man is on stage right now and he's supposed to be going out there, do what they practiced. Just like they practiced. For the fans.

His heart thumped in his chest and the nerves never wore off, even after the adrenaline of getting his hair pulled did.

-

Taemin is sure that he's not… like that . Not gay. He can't actually convince himself of that any more, and Jonghyun has fallen asleep next to him in their hotel.

“Hyung?”

He's passed out, spent, leg looped over Taemin's in a softly intimate way that makes a heat wave overcome him, from the hips up.

Maybe he's like that . He can't imagine life without his hyung, what else could it be but love?

-

Jinki asks if he's okay. He's dancing too much this week, even by Taemin standards. Jonghyun is reading a book in the corner of their company van, but his eyes snake up every so often to look at the two sitting across from him.

Taemin wonders, did he ask Jinki to ask?

“Why wouldn't I be? I'm just practicing. The new choreography is… a lot more. A lot harder.”

No one buys it – the kid dances in his sleep, and Jinki's eyes uncertainly peer through him.

“Okay. Just, lay off for a day soon so you can recover. We can't have you out because you danced yourself into the ICU.”

Taemin nods and Jonghyun stares at the same place on the page for the rest of the ride.

-

Jonghyun is waiting for him, the kitchen table littered with pages of his handwriting . Jonghyun looks up to the dorm door and then to the clock and Taemin knows he probably should have come home earlier. Or later. Just not at the time he did.

“Where were you?”

“At the studio?”

“I asked manager, he said you weren't there. Said you said you were going to recover at home before we start shooting.”

“Oh...”

Taemin was dressed as muted and inconspicuously as possible and Jonghyun visibly became aware of that. He was wearing his discreet citizen clothes that no one would look twice at, and Jonghyun was staring like he was undressing him, undressing his story.

Taemin was about to say something when he heard it. The shaking of the walls, the way they fell into a rhythm that Taemin had been doing his best to avoiding hearing all together.

Minho and Kibum were doing that thing.

Jonghyun sighed, dropping his head into his hands and chuckling humorlessly. “Ah, god, those two. I swear, I don't have insomnia, they're just always keeping me up.”

Taemin doesn't really know how to respond to that – what is he supposed to say? How is he supposed to say it? Aren't they supposed to ignore it when it's this loud?

Taemin spent years keeping himself away from this part of dorm life – pretending to be asleep at night, or on nights like this, coming home so late that he couldn't possibly expect anyone to be awake when he returned. It's a craft he‘s honed over the past five years, and, honestly, it was bound to come up. He was lucky he got away with it this long, in fact.

It's three AM.

Jonghyun's looking at him. He's been looking at him lately – intensely, like he wanted to wear him thin.

“I was just, out, trying to relax. Took a walk.”

Taemin takes off his cap and sets it on the counter. He takes cereal out from the taller cabinet and he's pouring himself a bowl when,

“It's been every night this week.”

There's no reason for him to feel as taut as he does in that split second. He hums, whether in approval or disagreement is anyone's guess.

“It's annoying, isn't it?”

“What is, hyung?” His bowl is too full.

Jonghyun huffs a little, drumming his fingernails against the laminate of the kitchen table. “You know. Kibum and Minho. Jinki's pissed off about how loud they've been getting lately.”

“Oh, ah, yeah. Yeah.”

“Hmm, aren't you sort of, I don't know, upset to have them ruining your sleep?”

“Oh, well, I guess I've been practicing and preparing a lot. I've been getting in later than… than they're... They're getting loud.”

“I noticed.”

A shiver runs up Taemin's back and it occurs to him, just how easy it could be to see through him. He tries to change the subject, and it's flimsy at best when, “Where's Jinki?”

“Oh, he's at his girlfriend's. Returning her shirts or shoes or something. I think it was just an excuse to be with her before promotions, you know?”

He grabs his bowl and turns back to Jonghyun, whose eyes are trained on him like a wild dog honing in on a small animal. (Or, at least, that's how it feels; Taemin's shrunk to the size of a rodent and he wanted nothing more than to scurry away and live in a dark hole.)

Taemin smiles. “Yeah, I guess so. We won't have a lot of time for personal things for a while.”

“Well, yes, I think so. Except… you.”

Taemin thinks that he might look like a deflated balloon, popped in an instant and his smile is faltering. His eyes are glinting, weakened like rocks broken with a pickaxe. “Hyung?”

Jonghyun is standing up, the embodiment of determination that Taemin knows so well. All of his years of good luck were crashing down on him right at the moment his hyung is standing in front of him.

Jonghyun's locked eyes with Taemin, grabbing the bowl that he had secured between his hands and setting it out of sight.

“I think your entire life is in the studio or practice room or on stage, isn't it?”

“I mean I… I guess. I'm just – ”

“I don't think I've seen you take someone home, actually.”

How does this come out of nowhere?

“Or, really, go to someone's home, like Jinki – ”

“Hyung, really, please...”

Jonghyun puts hands on either side of Taemin, braced against the counter top and Taemin doesn't know where to put his own hands.

Taemin has faced the world, bare chested and exposed like nerves caught in the wake of a flame. He's grown up in the entertainment industry. He's stood his ground on countless landslides and all it takes is eye contact with one person to shake him entirely.

Jonghyun is looking up at him, holding him in his gaze like a snake charming the charmer and Taemin can't breathe can't think can't feel anything – except–

Except… “I noticed a lot of things, Min-ah, lots of thing that I haven't talked about.”

The rules are crumbling, now, and Jonghyun's leaning into Taemin's ear. Taemin shivers, shockwaves  ending in his hands that don't know how to stop.

Jonghyun looks at them and his right hand is laying on top of Taemin's, sandwiched on the counter. “It's been five years since debut, but I've known you longer than that. In all the years, you've never… never brought someone home. Never talked about crushes or girls you liked – never have I seen your eyes gloss over like Jinki does with Jessica.”

Taemin's mouth is a desert, a landscape that can't be crossed. Jonghyun is good – always has been – at reading Taemin's silent language, the one spoken in expressive eyes and harsh breath and sweaty palms. It makes sense, how he'd know this whole time, how he'd see what was right in front of him.

Still.

“Hyung, you know… I'm busy… and i'm only now able to officially date and– ”

“Did rules ever matter to you? They didn't when you sneaked in cigarettes for everyone, when you went behind manager's back and sneaked out to get food – to hide our porn, to cheat on diets, to–”

“ I get it , let it go.”

Jonghyun pulls away from Taemin. The glint of a smile on his lips softens, transforms into the sort of intimacy Taemin wishes he knew. “I have a question, Min.”

It can't be anything good, but… “What is it?”

Jonghyun had dark circles – years of lost sleep – and he was drilling for oil, unashamed, when his eyes pierced Taemin's. “What are Kibum and Minho doing?”

The Gods conspired, and a thump against the wall followed by a sharp moan flowed down the stairs.

“Ah, hyung, really...”

The banging – the rhythmic pounding – suddenly sped and–

“No, really, Taemin, what are they doing?”

This is stupid. “You know what... what they're doing, hyung.”

“Can't you just say it?”

Jonghyun is in his space now – in the fragile area around Taemin where he can feel his body heat, his breath, and if he could listen of the sound of his own, he'd hear his heartbeat.

Maybe it would have beat fast– the way Taemin's was when his eyes were on their feet, on the checkered laminate floor, pretending that he wasn’t being confronted in his very own kitchen.

“Really I have to go – ”

“Taemin, are you gay?”

Jonghyun would be the first one to ask him. He'd be the only one to ask him. He breaks a lot of rules, but Taemin never expected him to break the rule .

Taemin's shaking, the way Jonghyun's searching for his eyes. The way he's wanting an answer and Taemin thinks it's okay, now, okay to talk.

He nods, drawing in a breath as shaky as road signs in a hurricane.

Jonghyun hums, then pulls him into a hug that is a lot more accepting than Taemin expected.

-

Everyone is sitting around the table – there's a feast and they're starving and this is the first true meal they've had in months.

Minho and Kibum are beside each other and no one says a word about how their eyes lock, but everyone sees it and it's beautiful, Taemin thinks, to see love as unashamed as theirs.

Taemin smiles directly at the two, trying to be polite instead of laugh at how dumb they can be – how dumb they are and how the fact that the two of them together makes them twice as dumb.

“Do you really think you're gonna get the first solo? Psh, It'll be me for sure,” Kibum said, a mouthful of rice forcing his words to contort to its shape.

Minho laughs. “Rap is hot in the market this year and the company would love a piece of this.”

Jonghyun is laughing with all of them, and he grabs Taemin's hand under the table. “As if. I'm sure it'll be Taemin, for sure.”

“Hyung, please,” Taemin giggles – it sounds too airy, too heated, but it's genuine and he loves the way Jonghyun smiles at hm and squeezes his hand.

“Oh but I'm telling the truth, it has to be you – our precious maknae. Doesn't everyone agree?”

Approving nods and words through stuffed mouths rebound across the table, circling back around to Taemin as he ducks his head in modesty.

He's still smiling, and it feels unlike any time he's ever sat around his brothers, his members, and felt at peace. “Hyung, you're too confident in me.”

“Ah, but you need to learn to brag a little.”

“You need to learn modesty.”

“Amen,” Jinki added, right before sticking another piece of pork.

-

Taemin never brought up that conversation with Jonghyun – the one in the kitchen that turned into an embarrassing sob-fest in less than a minute. It remained, as it always did, a subtext of every conversation, every part of their lives, that they treaded over it as if it weren't always there.

Until, now. It's a hotel room, one in Tokyo they'd been in before, and Taemin's on his own bed tracing patterns in the ceiling with his eyes when he asks how Jonghyun knew he was gay.

“It's the way you look at me, Min, that really gets to me.”

And Taemin has no idea how it went from one secret, to another, with just one breath. From Jonghyun knowing about him being who he is to loving who he does.

Taemin chokes on air and he's clamming up, a hot seconds difference between last minute's ceiling doodles and being faced with… with–

“I think I saw you watching me off stage and I don't think anyone really looks at me like that. It wasn't like you wanted to tear my clothes off, it's like you were taken away.”

Taemin turns his head, and Jonghyun is staring at his crossed legs, hands fidgeting with the remote that was more a prop than anything. It made him look busy, and Taemin's heart sped up.

“I...”

Normally, Taemin would be apologizing, trying to fix the wrongness of himself and how dare he fall in love with a friend. How dare he betray that trust that friends are supposed to have.

Taemin draws a blank, heart still feverish in the way it was trying to vibrate out of existence – he gets up and sits next to Jonghyun, an instinct that caught himself off guard. He's made of nerves when his hand comes to lay on Jonghyun's shoulder, but he takes pride in his steadiness.

Jonghyun looks at him – Taemin's never been so torn apart than with that look and his hand retreats. “I don't think anyone's stared at me and looked like they were in love.”

Taemin wants to shrink into himself but, “There are literally thousands of girls who stare at you and want to marry you, hyung.”

“But do they know me?”

Taemin's face is overheating and he looks down to the same remote in Jonghyun's hand. “No.”

“Do they spend time with me playing video games and making food late at night and do they fall asleep on my shoulder when we're driving to the airport?”

Taemin shakes his head, and Jonghyun laughs. “See, then they don't really love me.”

But I do .

Jonghyun tilted Taemin's head up, faced him, and kissed him – it was one movement, so smooth that Taemin didn't realize it was happening until about three seconds in.

He's kissing back, slowly – really really poorly because in the last year, he's probably only kissed someone three times, all of which had been drunk encounters with people he realized weren't Jonghyun.

Jonghyun snorts, still kissing him but suddenly urgently trying not to laugh.

Taemin's almost offended till Jonghyun says, “Hey, feel how cold my hands are,” and sneaks his hand underneath Taemin's thick sweater.

It might have been an excuse to get close to Taemin, but Taemin doesn't care because his world rearranged itself in front of him and– damn–

“Hyung!” He recoiled, shocked at just how cold Jonghyun's hands were.

The tension is still there but they're smiling like idiots. “See?” Jonghyun said over a lopsided smile, eyes bold and shy at the same time. He's collected Taemin's hands in his and they're sitting closely, and Taemin wants to lean in but doesn't know if he should. If he could.

Jonghyun is looking at his lips – so obviously, so distractingly that Taemin doesn't register what is being said.

“I'd really like to kiss you again,” is what he hears when Jonghyun repeats himself, and his ears warm and his stomach flutters and he still nods yes . There's subtext, it sounds like I love you, I can't trust myself to love you, what if this is a dream , and he's crying before he realizes he's doing it.

“Ah, god, Tae,” Jonghyun gasped, breathless. His fingers swipe across Taemin's tear-slicked cheeks and surges forward, like he's drawn so entirely to Taemin that he can't help but try to bridge the imaginary distance between them.

Taemin's breath is always sucked up into Jonghyun, and when he breathes back in it's all Jonghyun; his scent surrounding him, his hands endlessly unsatisfied and constantly finding their ways back onto his bare skin.

Jonghyun is a force, a train, something so unstoppable and utterly sweeping that Taemin catches his enthusiasm and shifts a little.

“ Mmm, ah , Tae,” Jonghyun says in a moment of separation. He's guiding, nails grazing the exposed skin at Taemin's back, a subtle force that directs them onto their sides.

The kissing is infinite – it's how Taemin imagines passion to feel if it were distilled into only a few moments, a few minutes, of breathlessness and so much urgency that he might have thought the world was ending.

The kissing is not infinite, and neither is the heat in the lowest parts of his stomach. Jonghyun's legs are between his, wrapped around each other, a twining of limbs that felt as natural as it was new. The context, the swollen lips and puffy eyes, was new, while memories of falling asleep in a similar way were as old as memory itself.

There were moments where Taemin couldn't bring himself to truly look at Jonghyun, even with him laying right beside him and looking at him, all teary eyed and pink and at a loss for footing.

“Your eyes.”

“What about them?”

Jonghyun's thumb was on Taemin's hip, the only exposed part of him, rubbing circles. “They're pretty.”

“They're swollen and gross.”

“If you haven't noticed, your lips are too – but they're still beautiful.”

The last stray tears flitted down Taemin's face, the necessary last few hangers on that he needed to rid himself of. The words stung – bitter and foreign and offset, like he was perched delicately on fantasy that sudden words would knock him back to a reality he didn’t want to be in.

“Hey, talk to me,” Jonghyun nudged.

“Do… are you… like me?”

“Mmmhmm.”

Taemin smiled. “Do you like me?”

A wider smile grazed Jonghyun’s face, and he rolled his eyes. “Yep. A lot.”

Taemin didn’t want to cry anymore but he did and this time -- it felt different. Happier, like he could breathe again (or for the first time, maybe).

Still cloudy, still filled with haze and confusion, he had it in him to cry and smile. “I think… I think I can work with that.”

Jonghyun snorted, brushing away tears and letting his fingers linger on Taemin’s skin. “Dummy, you’re gonna have to work with it. I really want this to work and I want to be with you and I want you .”

Jonghyun, his hands on Taemin’s thighs, is bigger than life again -- a monument to all the things Taemin couldn’t do. That Jonghyun -- the untouchable, the beautiful, the one he daydreamed about -- was shattering now, and Taemin felt like it was okay.

It was okay to take his hand, hold it there on his jeans over his thighs and let himself appreciate it. Just a bit.

“I just, don’t -- I don’t know how.” Taemin feels stupid when he says it. He feels like he should know.

“Neither do I. I don’t think anyone does.”

“Well not everyone but normal people do and --“

“Normal? What, you mean straight?”

Taemin was scrambling for footing -- but he had none. That’s exactly what he meant - normal people, the ones who can have kids and hold hands and not feel like their skin was crawling with eyes that hated seeing them. Taemin swallowed and had nowhere to go, just retreat to his corner and feel like a shadow against the sun.

Jonghyun had a torn look on his face, in his searching eyes. He didn’t look upset,Taemin realized. It took a second before he recognized that it wasn’t pity, that it was sadness.

Suddenly, their hands shifted and Jonghyun rolled on top of him, thigh splitting Taemin’s legs open. Jonghyun didn’t meet resistance, not an ounce of stop , and his hands perched him on top of Taemin.

Jonghyun kissed his forehead, his breath cascading over Taemin -- his scent, the toothpaste and the floral and the way he always had some candle scent stuck on him, surrounded and engulfed and Taemin didn’t know what to do with it.

“You know, those people won’t ever get to experience this and that’s sad. They won’t have half of what we can “ -- and he kissed the spot between Taemin’s eyes -- “They won’t know what this is like” -- and he kissed his nose -- “They won’t get it and they’ll miss out on you and me and honestly who gives a fuck about them? I only give a damn about you.”

Jonghyun hovered, lingering like a question, before finally kissing Taemin.

It felt like a declaration -- it felt like love masked in poetry and Taemin nodded when he came eye to eye with Jonghyun. He couldn’t shake the feeling, stop thinking, that this kiss was wrong -- or not entirely right.

But then it deepened -- fuck, is Jonghyun a good kisser -- and he couldn’t think anymore, not about his family or his guilt or anything inbetween.

“Ah, Jjong... “ Taemin whispered, his breath hot and steamy, looking at Jonghyun with hooded eyes.

Jonghyun chuckled -- Taemin felt it resonate against him, their chests so close together -- and went in for a quicker kiss. “It’s like that -- you look at me like that. That’s how I knew.”

Taemin laughed into his mouth and rolled with all that followed.

The Princess of Ophitis

The Beginning

It was a beautiful and peaceful day in kingdom of Ophitis but as for now, it is very busy as the people hurried to set up the streets with beautiful banners, lanterns painted in many colors, flowers lining the street where the royal princess will rid along side her father in a carriage, greeting and waving to their royal subjects. The servants rushed down the halls bumping into each other along their way. The reason why for all this hurry, it's because today is the day the princess will be crowned Queen of Ophitis. The door to my bedroom open than closed softly to be followed by light footsteps. A warm hand placed softly onto my shoulder starts to shake me. "Your highness, it's time to get up. Today you'll be crowned and you can not be late." A hush voice whispers to me but I only bury my face deeper into the lush pillow, ignoring the person. The hand removed from my shoulder before the owner of the voice spoke. "Now don't make me get you out of this bed." They warned in a teasing voice. Before anything can happen I snap my eyes open but to only quickly close them as the bright sunlight stung my eyes. Pushing myself up my eyes finally adjust to the lighting, opening I saw Zara ,shaking her head chuckling at me. Zara is my handmaiden who took care for me when my father couldn't, which was all the time. "Come on sleepyhead, we must get you dressed an presentable for the day." Zara said walking over to my closet, wrapping her flawless dark hands around the rosewood handles and pulled them open to revel my dresses. She reached in already picking out the one that was custom made for this day. The dress it's self is beautiful. The top front is Teal that curves under my breast to the side and intertwine in the front to the collar that was with silver vine lacing all around it. Around Apatite crystal in the middle where is held together by custom chain strung across my arms where it reached my back and in the middle of my back laid a crescent upside down moon and six Apatite crystals inside the moon. The middle part of the dress is purely, spotless white corset as well the peplums with the same lacing around the edges and tiny Apatite crystals in it and pearls, the waistband hand the same crescent moon, same crystals but on the ends of it are four long chains that has Teal pearls in them. And the bottom half is the same Teal but the end of the skirt embroidered and at the sides is a see through cloth that shine different colors in the light. I pulled the covers off of me swinging my legs to the side of the bed where my feet met with the cold wood floor. Raising my arm up above my head, stretching my tired muscles awake before standing up and walk towards Zara who helped me put the dress on. After I was dressed Zara helped me with makeup and hair. Nothing to fancy or overwhelming, just a little bit of makeup to seem as though I wasn't wearing any and my hair was done flawlessly into fitting along with my dress. I felt my heart beat faster and faster in my chest, my breathing getting heavier with each breath but I must remain calm. It's the Queens job to kept things calm, making sure that her kingdom is calm. Glancing to the side my e/c orbs caught sight of my tiara. The band is shining gold with small diamonds on the front, the top are sets of three crystals running along the band. 'This will be the last day I were it...' I thought. A hand rest on top of my shoulder causing me to snap out of my thought, looking up to see Zara with a soft smile on her face but her dark brown orbs glossy. "Zar-" I was cut off. "You'll make a perfect Queen your highness as we all know you'll be." Her voice slightly crack but she kept her emotions in check. I pushed myself off of my seat standing in front of her. Truth be told, Zara was more like a mother to me then a handmaiden. She help me grow up to be who I am and I'm thankful for her being in my life when my mother couldn't. My lips tugged into a sad smile laying both hand on her arms. "I'm sorry your highness for you to see me like but I just didn't think time would fly by so fast...I still remember the day I first held you as a tiny baby and now look. A beautiful eighteen year old.....Your mother would be so proud of you." Zara cried as the tears now flow free. "And it's all because of you Zara. You taught me how to be strong, caring, thoughtful and most importantly. How to become a proper princess. I wouldn't be here without you." I said with pride an joy in my voice but my eye betrayed me as tears rolls down my cheek. "That's why I-" Before I could finish a knock came from the door. "Your highness. We've have come to get you." The door open to reveal the two knights. They are wear heavy metal armor that covers them from head to toe. Their chest plates had two circles, one on each side that had a gold piece of chain that ran from one to the other. The edges on the armor are lined with gold all around. But their helmet have a slit in the middle running across the face an a slit from the bottom of the other until it reached the chin. Drape over their shoulders are the colors of out kingdom, Blue an gold that also goes under their chest plates and runs down the middle of their abdomen an attach to their waist is a sword, the other hands they held shields. Looking over my shoulder I gave a short nod before Zara voice replied back to them. "Alright gentlemen. Let me just fix her up." She grabs a small cloth from under her sleeve and used it to wipe away any ruin makeup. Reaching to the mirror stand she grabs my tiara. The band is pure gold and small diamonds running along the band making it look as if it was made with vines. On top of the band are sets of large crystals. She gently place it upon my head, her hands resting on my shoulders. "There we go....Alright now the princess is yours men. Hurry now, it's almost time and we can't keep everyone waiting." Zara placed a kiss on my cheek an I did the same, which is rare. The knights lead me out of the castle, out the halls and open a set of large double doors which lead outside the front of the castle. Waiting for me is a carriage. It looks like it was just once a simple carriage but now painted over with white all around and gold trimming the edges. I squint my eye to see a silhouette that I couldn't describe at first but once stepping closer I can saw unmistakable clothing. One guard grabs the handle of the door before opening for me, bowing at the waist he helps me in with his other hand and closed the door after me. Sitting in front of him my lips curled up into a grin. "Hello father. It's nice to see you and you look splendid in that, might I say." I said to my father, who wore a smile upon his face. His hair was starting to turn grey as well his beard, deep winkles lined his face from all the time of being that king. "My, look at you. You look just like your mother when we first got married. Breathtaking." He said in soft tone than rather his harsh leader one. Reaching with an arm he stroke a fallen piece of hair behind my ear before resting it on my cheek. "I know I haven't been in your life much and I'm sorry for that but do not worry. From no on, I promise to be with you everyday." He said before leaning back into his seat. The carriage jolts forward, cuing it's leave. We sat in complete silence, enjoying the peace before it get crazy with cheers, cries, laughing and crying. After some turns we finally made the edge of the village where people await us. I lean down slightly to look out the window seeing my people cheering and throwing flowers in the air. Raising my hand up I wave at the long rows of crowd. It was a overwhelming feeling. Happiness, joy, excitement and other feelings pump through my  veins. My vision was block by brown fur. Scrunching my eyebrows together I look up seeing what was blocking my view. It was a horse that is in my way but it wasn't alone. On top of it was the knight commoner. "Your highness. I'm glad to see you made it on time than being late because you rather sleep up in your rooms." The knight commoner looks down at me, his voice ringing with a teasing tone. My cheeks warmed up and I turned my head to look inside. "That's funny because I once remember you getting yelled at by father for sleeping on the first day of your job...Am I right sir Aithlin?" I turn back towards him with a slight smirk. "That was one time and you know you." He replied back, a finger pointing at me. "Oh really?" I giggled. "Now you two it's not the time for this. You can argue like an old married couple once the crowning if over." My father laugh but his tone was serious. Me an Aithlin broth quite but before he should leave I stuck my tongue out at him. My father shaking his head at me. Then it was time. The carriage came to a stop and my father got out first to do his speech before he will call me to be crowned. Waiting I picked at my nails, chewing on my bottom lip as thoughts run through my brain. 'Will I be a good queen? Will I even be able to protect my people like my father had or will I fail them? I'm not even sure if I'm ready for this.' I thought to myself, a sigh pasting my lips. Casting my eye forward I hear the carriage door open beside me, Aithlin bowed at the waist, holding a hand out, father smiling proudly at me and held my crown in his hands. I slowly stepped out making sure my back is straight and tall, not a slight slouch in my shoulders, head held high an my face was straight as well. Once reaching near my father I got down on one knee and bowed my head. At this point everything seem to slow down for me. Fathers words barley reached my ears cause of the fast beating of my heart, it was until a horrific scream caused me to snap my head towards the sound but before I could see who scream, a strong heating force knocked me out. My body felt like it has been stumbled on by a thousand horses, opening my eyes I could feel a strong heat blow against my face. Widening my eyes I couldn't believe before me. The whole kingdom was on fire. Building were destroyed, fire quickly speared anything it touched, dead bodies laying in their own pool of blood from being crushed or arrows an other wounds caused by weapons or some are burn to a crisp, the others crying over their dead beloved ones, some running away from the fire an falling buildings but then I saw creatures of the other races chasing after them with weapons in their hands. Some carried battle axes, some carried spears, arrows, swords and shields as some fought against the kingdoms knights but there were to many of the creatures and they were cut down. My vision blurs from tears swelling up. Here I lay in in the dirt an rumbles, petrified with fear that I couldn't even move my own sore and weak limbs even as a orc made his way towards me. His green  lips curl up into a devilish wicked grin and his bright organe eyes burned into mine. Dark crimson blood clung to his as well his beard an forearms. In one hand he held a wooden club with spikes pocking out of it. "Look at'ya! This human whore survived the cannon boys!" The orc said to the other once they spotted me. The blood soaked one steps closer to me and raised his leg backward to lunch it into my abdomen, a creaking sound came from the impacted and I let out a painful cry. I cradle my stomach but the pain in my arms was to powerful. "Asegrn, I think that is princess of humans." One of the orcs, much smaller then the rest said to the one whom assume is Asegrn. "Even betta'." Reaching a bulky arm out he grabs me by the hair an roughly snaps my neck up to face him. "Velethuil will pay a high price of ya' her head." Asegrn breath hit my face. I wanted to vomit but I couldn't from the fear. Keeping me in the same position another orc steps closer towards me, a long ragged sword in his hand. The orc raised the blade up, a grin on his face while he stares into my eyes. Closing them a few tears escape as I waited for my death. 'So this is how I'll die? By the hands of these creatures who hated my kind for so long...I'm sorry my kingdom. I'm sorry for those who were killed today, men, women and children...I'm sorry I couldn't protect you from danger.' My final words repeated in my head. But the blow never came. Instead a shrill shrike came. I open my eyes to see Cal standing in front of me, her trusty sword in her hands. and a orc with a half missing arm while black blood squirts out of the wound "You will pay for laying you're filthy hands on our highness you repulsive  bastards" Cal hiss. "Cal..." My voice broke speaking. "Get her out of here Aithlin!" She snaps her head to watch as her older brother rushed over to the highness side. "Hold onto me your highness..." Aithlin whispered in a rush tone before he wraps an arm under my knees and the other around my torso. Turning around he spirits off, quickly dogging any incoming attacks, jumping over fallen beams. Everything was a blur to me. The colors of organe an yellow dance in my eyes. The one blue sky now black with smoke and the once beautiful stone streets covered with large wholes, fallen buildings, blood and dead bodies. "Y/n! Aithlin!" My father calls out to us, riding up to use on his horse. He looks at me with sad eye but they soon turn to pure rage. "Get my daughter out of here. Somewhere far away where he won't find her! Use my horse, he'll get you to wherever you need to be" He spoke in a harsh voice. "But sir wha-" Aithlin was cut off. "That's an order!" My father yelled. Stepping back he nods his head before rushing off into battle. Aithlin climbs onto the horse, I sitting in front of him but I tried to get away from him. I couldn't let my father die like this. He's the only family I have left. "Let me go!" I cried but I was to weak against the tall elf as he kicks the horse sides urging it to rush out of the gates. As we were about to exit the gates I turn my head over his shoulder but I wish I didn't. Everything seem to slow down. He was surrounded by the enemy. Parring a attack he didn't notice the one from behind him nor did block the blade as it slice through his chest, exiting from one end to the other. Tears start to cloud my eyes and I helplessly tried to reach out but I knew it was to late. The orc before, Asegrn took a sword from his men, steeping up to my father who fell to his knees and grabs him by his hair and then he brought his sword down cutting the human king head from his shoulders.