#i love this woman with my entire being
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i finished it, was kicked out of the game, and then spent the next 10 minutes drawing this. i will now go take a shower, most likely cry, and then go through the emotional turmoil of convincing myself to reset so i can do a geno run. i hate it here :D
#undertale yellow#uty#my art#<- ifg#spoilers under these tags beware. although it is mostly just me being very very sad#that entire thing was heart wrenching. anyways#CEROBAS FIGHT??? HELLO???#i had to exit out of it the first time (i got to the last phase) to get better items but i came back and won pretty quickly#but THE CUTSCENES?!?!?#JFC NO WONDER THIS WOMANS SO MESSED UP. HER HUSBAND PRACTICALLY DIED IN HER ARMS AND THE LAST THING HE LEFT HER WITH- HIS DYING WISH- COULD#ONLY BE FULFILLED BY PUTTING THEIR ONLY CHILD IN DEATHS WAY. AND THEN WHEN SHE TOOK THAT RISK THE WORST THING HAPPENED AND SHE NOW HAS TO#LIVE WITH THE GUILT OF BEING THE ONE TO. MOST LIKELY. KILL HER ONE AND ONLY DAUGHTER#ALL THE WHILE SHE WAS PUSHING AWAY HER CHILDHOOD BEST FRIEND AND CONVINCING HERSELF THAT SHE WAS IN THE RIGHT TO SACRIFICE CLOVER WHO HAD#BEEN ONLY KIND MERCIFUL AND JUST THIS WHOLE TIME. EVEN TO THOSE WHO WERE TRYING TO KILL THEM. FUCK.#AAND WHEN CLOVER HUGGED HER I DOUBLED OVER IRL BC *THATS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED TO DO IN THAT MOMENT* I HATE IT (read: love it) HERE#n dont even get me STARTED on after that. when clover started moving on their own and the gd white screen came up and we got flashbacks of#everyone's words. thats when the tears rlly started coming bc it clicked for me. 'oh. this is it. isn't it?' and IT WAS#WHEN THEY GAVE THEIR FUCKIGN HAT AND GUN AWAY TO MARTLET AND STARLO WELL THATS WHEN I REALLY STARTED CRYING#AAND THE GROUP HUGG#I WAS SOBBING WHENEVER I HAD TO WATCH THEM CRAWL UP AGAINST THE WALL AND DIE AND HAVE FLOWEYS WORDS PLAY OVERHEAD#AND THE FUCKOGN#THE F U C K I N G#AFTEWRCREDITS SCENE WHERE WE GOT THE 'You heard someone calling for help. You answered.' I GOT CHILLS SO BAD#to think that all the other souls have stories just as expansive and emotional as clover n frisks. how fucked up is that. in a good way tho#and finally the last scene where we got all 4 of our main friends sending us off in waterfall and we see clovers items end up in the dump#just waiting to be found by bratty and catty. fucken hell man this was a masterpiece#anyways time to reset and obliterate everyone and never emotionally recover from that ever!! really is feeling like 2016-17 again w the way#this game has me sobbing my eyes out and feeling the guilt of knowing that i dont HAVE to kill them all but im too curious not to#oh well. at least i have the balls to do it this time around instead of letting a youtuber do it for me ig
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Not to be That Guy but like.
Am I the only one that can't stop thinking about how Tianlang-Jun says about Luo Binghe that he pretends to be cold-hearted like his mother. The hint of fondness there, the heartache in that utterance.
Like it drives me absolutely insane. Imagining her putting on a front of strength, cold and driven and unrelenting. Why does TLJ say that about her. Did she secretly look for solutions that meant reconciling with demons instead of hurting them when her sect wasn't looking? (I wonder this because I feel like his weird fondness for SQQ would lowkey track if it's connected to the woman he once loved.) Did he mean that she was tasked with basically assassinating him and she fell in love with him instead (re: failed step one)? Did he mean that she was fond and doting in her own way (e.g. conceding he was attractive, paying for his exploits and humoring him)? Did he mean that, like LBH, she thought that power would be the thing to protect her--and that it was disguising a person who was deeply and privately wounded? All four????? I don't need sleep I need a n s w e r s
Did she know about the Huanhua Palace Master's skeevy ass intentions before she met TLJ? Or did those only come to significant light after she fell in love with TLJ? Is that why she never anticipated that level of betrayal, because initially she had no intention of being with anyone romantically? And HHPM just assumed she would be under his thumb forever?? Was she furious at her own indiscretion or did she try to use the pregnancy as a bargaining chip, a way to try to stop the immortals of Cang Qiong Mountain from attacking TLJ (plus the bonus of marriage entrapment no takesies backsies this is where LBH gets it from)? Did she try to use that claim on her to dissuade HHPM from his covetous advances, framing herself as tainted so that she could finally escape? Did she dream of a life by TLJ's side, far away from Cang Qiong Mountain?
Like. Literally every single permutation of what this could mean guts me to hell. Do you ever just cry about tianxi because I--[loud bawling noises]
#svsss#tianxi#tianlang jun#su xiyan#like this shit keeps me awake at night#i'm trying to put fic ideas together and every time i go back to that line i just#find myself trying to parse and hone out su xiyan's mannerisms/personality#zzl's descriptions help a great deal but i also love that they're limited in the sense that#1. zzl was clearly scared shitless of/disconcerted with her LMFAO#2. he was suspicious of her (as a cultivator fundamentally) and its fascinating that TLJ did not seem to share this suspicion at all#or one could argue tlj just didn't care beyond his attraction and glee being around her jkahglfdskjhsfkhjg#there is also the hilarious implication that part of what turned tlj on so much about sx is the fact that she could prbly kill him#tlj really said 'i love a woman who can and WILL kick my ass'#'none of that soft power seduction shit manhandle me or nothing'#like he always believed deep down--or at the very least wanted to believe--that she loved both him and lbh dearly#i'm not usually the fix-it fic type but the Way I Need To See Su Xiyan Destroy Huanhua Palace Master's Entire Life.#i just want sx and her boytoy to live happily ever after is that so wrong?#i also think of that person (im so sorry tumblr user i dont rmr who u are at the minute) that said there had to be trust between tlj and sx#because YES. ABSOLUTELY. I AGREE. AND I WANT IT FOR ME#don't mind me just the usual descent into madness anytime i think too hard about svsss#i need to outline damn you airplane and your refusal to expand on LBH's juicy ass backstory#ill never forgive the chinese (joke)
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I think the most insane thing about metal as a genre is that it's held up to be this counterculture of people who don't fit in, of going against the mainstream (as was the idea back in the day).
And then you go in and it's just edgy straight men who don't even know their outfit is heavily influenced by gay fetish wear.
It's gotten way better over the past 10 years and depends on the subgenre ofc - there's a lot of cool queer folks too, but man.
#what's up I'm writing about metal for a paper and found some things i didn't want to know#foxy speaks#i mean shit i did some simple calculations for a paper two years back and in the five biggest metal labels i knew in only 20% of the bands#there was a single woman. two of them were in two bands even. most were singers.#and that's fucking basic maths. not to speak of uh. having entire subgenres knows for being fash#i love metal but as someone who hopes for more than “eh not my problem” on human rights issues in an artist's own front yard it's not ideal
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[ID: a coloured and shaded digital sketch of Luz and Lilith from the owl house. They're depicted with their designs from For the Future. Luz is tackle-hugging Lilith, ugly crying and exclaiming "I missed you so much". Lilith braces for the hug and smiles with tears also in her eyes. The background is a pale yellow colour and previous versions of the sketch can be seen at low opacity behind the full drawing. End ID]
When you see your cool aunt (actually a loser but you love her) for the first time in months and she has a badass apocalypse makeover but still somehow looks like a librarian
#the owl house#toh#luz noceda#lilith clawthorne#I have a distinct feeling they won't reunite until the last episode (which I'm cool with#we're kinda busy rn)#but that won't stop me from imagining self-indulgent scenarios!! I love their relationship so much#luz really went from calling Lilith a bitch in the only way the disney channel would allow to being like. okay she's pathetic#in the first few episodes of season 2 and then by elsewhere and elsewhen when Lilith is visibly doing better luz is so supportive#of like. her new job and hobbies and stuff#and Lilith is still the same cringe fail slug woman we all know and love but she cares about Luz!#she wants to help her and share her interests with her!#they're so lame together and I adore them soooo much. adhd and autism best friends forever (real)#this was a quick doodle that i put way too mucn effort into colouring and posing wise to not post#I'm proud of the shading not bc it's especially intricate or pretty#but because the process was entirely me colour picking each individual colour and futzing with it until i got coherent shading#it's not something i do often but i love to practice it cause i feel like it improves my colour sense#and also allows me to micro manage the palette#like how Luz's azura outfit and the inside of her mouth and Lilith's skin are all the same shade of off-white#BUT i gave Lilith's a warmer shading tone (bc it's skin and has blood beneath it) while Luz's teeth has a yellow shading cast#(since that's the colour teeth turn w/o enamel and most ppls teeth is a yellowy off-white anyway) and then Luz's outfit has a teal cast!#bc i wanted white fabric to look different to pale white skin or teeth#that's such a niche thing to have fun doing and appreciate abt my own work but like. it's there!#I'm not a master of colour by any means it's just nice to be able to do that
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How does everyone say Bj is gay when his entire personality is wife guy. There were two episodes where he almost cheated on her with other women, stopped himself, and felt weird and shitty about it. That’s not the behavior of someone not attracted to women. I’m not saying he can’t like guys, but hes def into ladies. It can even not contradict canon bc again, wife guy. You can be bi and not cheat on your wife. Or you can write fics where he does I’m not your mom. But he isn’t gay.
#mash#bj hunnicutt#do NOT try to make this about shipping I ship him and Hawkeye already get off my dick#I’m just saying there’s more than one kind of queer stop saying the wrong one exclusively#it’s like making Hawkeye a conservative like. come on guys it’s his ENTIRE thing that he loves his wife#a good half of the episodes about his issues the issue is#that he misses his wife and kid and feels like a bad husband since he provide#he doesn’t give a fuck about the handy man he’s upset HE isn’t doing it for her#he’s not against women getting jobs he’s upset HE can’t provide for her.#being attracted to this one specific woman is his entire THING my guy
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NAH NO ABSOLUTELY NOT TELL MEEE TEEEELLLLL MEEEEEEE WHY I WAS PEACEFULLY SCROLLING TIKTOK AND I SEE ONE COMMENT SECTION FLOOODEEDDD WITH SHIT LIKE "astoria greengrass hate club lol" "astoria haters ⬇️⬇️⬇️" "I can't stand astoria" WHAAATTT WHAT THE FUUCCKK WHAT ARE YOU EVEN ACTUALLY FUCKING TALKING ABOUY WHTA THE VBGAGSJSLW I CANNOT EVEN COMPREHEND WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE ON ABOUT IM GONNA FUCKINGFHFHFJFUFKM WHAT DO YOU EVEN MEEAAANN SHUT THE FYCK UPP OH MY GOD WHAT WHAT DID SHE EVER DO?????
anywayz number one astoria greengrass defender love her so much I will skin your whole body with my teeth if you try and fuck with her that is MY GIRL <3<3<3
#WHAT ARE THEY EVEN HATING???? THE THREE LINES ABOUT HER WE GET TALKING ABOUT HOW LOVELY SHE IS???? TF???#AT LEAST SOME HAD THE DECENCY TO ADMIT THEY HATE HER JUST BECAUSE SHES WRITTEN SO HORRIBLY IN FANFICS#YEAH CAUSE ALL THE DRACO SUCK UPS NEED TO GET HIS ACTUAL WONDERFUL WIFE OUT THE WAY TO SELF INSERT THEMSELVES AS AN UNRECOGNISIBLE HERMIONE#OR MAKE HIM SOME WEIRD LITTLE DEFENCELESS TWINK THATS BEING FORCED INTO AN ARRANGE MARRIAGE W/ A MEAN EVIL WOMAN SO HARRY CAN COME SAVE HIM#OHHHH YOU GUYS ARE MAKING ME HATE FANFICTION IM SO ANGRY#THIS IS ACTUALLY WHY DISCERNING FANON FROM CANON IS SO IMPORTANT BECAUSE WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK MAN#SHUT UP OH MY GOD#im so mad#ASTORIA GET BEHIND ME 🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺#JUST SO YOU KNOW DRACO WOULD HATE ALL OF YOU FOR SAYING THIS SHIT 🗣🗣🗣#this is not directed at any dramione or drarry fans who actually give astoria some sense of justice i dont hate all of you <3#JUST PEOPLE WHO ARE MEAN TO MY GIRL#astoria greengrass#astoria malfoy#drastoria#hpcc#i cannot comprehend that this angel of a woman HAS HATERS??????#fucking crazy out here bro#harry potter fans are something else oml#i hate tiktok gonna delete my entire account now ive had enough#/j
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just watched 5x21 (saviors) and godddddd cameron is such a closeted lesbian/aromantic
#i mean this is nothing i didn't already know but damn#the way she was avoiding being around chase and simultaneously avoiding breaking up with him...honey...#idk as someone who dated a man for two years while figuring out i was gay#(and (platonically) cared about that man a lot)#i Feel her#and the way she doubled down at the end of the episode and asked him to propose to her??#even though she literally said she didn't want that??#with the flimsy 'oh i don't want him to propose just bc kutner died last week' excuse#like girl????#baby no you just don't want to be with him#because you either need to be with a woman#or opt out of romance entirely and just have fun sexytimes with women and possibly men too#please cameron my love you will be so much happier that way#house md#house season 5#house 5x21#op
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so i love the whole “not everyone who looks like a monster is a monster” thing that was introduced but
it makes me really (worried?) interested about what they’ll do about Tyson if we get season 2
are they going to make it more of a “Percy’s mad at Poseidon for having a kid with someone other than Sally” thing?
my biggest fear with their treatment of Tyson is that they’ll have him do something genuinely bad that’ll make Percy’s discomfort with him be justified, and with how the show is I’m really worried that they’ll take that route
it just wouldn’t make sense for Percy to give Medusa a chance but then feel uncomfortable with having a cyclops for a brother unless there was some other reason behind it
#pjo#pjo disney+#percy jackson#tyson pjo#if the writers mess with my boy tyson istg#istg writers you better not have tyson do something bad#and it’s not like they can take out percy being uncomfortable with calling tyson his brother#to be fair i haven’t read som in a while#but iirc that’s an important part of the plot so??#also poseidon being more clearly in love with sally in the show makes tyson’s entire conception more awkward#like you can’t still be in love with a woman and then have a cyclops kid with someone else poseidon…#not to mention tyson was straight up abandoned pretty much at birth iirc#god they’re gonna have to change a lot for season 2 aren’t they…
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once again thinking about how easy it would be for me to be in a relationship if i was cis
#cis woman cis man either way#dude in the neighborhood has a crush on me telling me i'm beautiful like 'thanks! i will go home and cry now'#i fucking hate being trans i wish i wasn't lol#and sometimes i feel like i can't talk about this anywhere bc in a lot of trans spaces it's like. taboo? to express anything but positivity#as if me being honest about how i feel about myself is somehow how i feel about every single trans person jesus christ but whatever whateve#like listen peace and love but i need you to do me a favor and promise me you will not come at me with any 'transness should be about joy'#i know you mean well i know you're right. but transness for me /is/ pain and sorrow. that's all it's ever caused me my entire life#you have to remember that i'm from rural appalachian tennessee with a transphobic family#some of the most deeply rooted self hating repression for years just for. more honest self hatred#i've never admitted this before but i've considered detransitioning and repressing because of transphobia many times#i'm not brave i'm not strong i'm not trying to make some grand statement or be the voice of a generation. i just want to Be. you know#i just got really really unlucky#but i can't repress. i know that would be even more miserable so i'm just. trapped. forever#who i want to be forever out of reach like tantalus or something i don't know#i want to be loved#or maybe i should just watch the batman again
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man. even after spending a month bracing myself for it, and making sure I was well-informed and prepared to stand my ground if my hunch turned out to be correct, it sure didn't feel great getting confirmation that my mom has been uncritically guzzling all kinds of pro-zionist propaganda like water and has made herself nigh impervious to any and all factual information 💀💀💀
#buny text#tragic: the most stubborn woman you know who bases her entire self worth on being right about everything is Extremely Extremely Wrong again#I'm proud of myself for just keeping my composure during that conversation because i felt ready to snap if she brought up hamas again#the effort required to restrain myself from getting outwardly upset was literally making my body and voice tremble#anyways I'm stuck here now until i find an apartment so i guess I'd better put my whole ass into accomplishing that#love being treated like a brainwashed conspiracy theorist for literally just getting my info from anywhere more reliable than facebook 🙄
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Y'all do know you can't make Jason be NOT white without changing his whole character, right?
For other characters, yes, because their physical appearance are not that influential in their story, on how they are viewed by people, on their personality formation — you can have a black/asian/indigenous/arab/brown/latino/etc Nico and yes, the hate he gets will have a undertone of racism but at the same time nothing significant on his story, motivation or personality will need to change. This is also true for other characters: Clarisse risks repeating the "aggressive WoC" stereotype but the character itself doesn't change.
This isn't true for Jason, whose main character trait is how he is perceived by others and how he showcases himself to others based on that perception. (specially with how little effort Riordan put on him besides making him perfect-er Percy who's somehow also weaker and less important than him).
Let's not pretend a black, Arab, indigenous, Asian, Latin man, etc, in the USA would ever be treated with the universal reverence Jason gets from New Roma, you can't have the illusion of perfection and most of all, of invincibility they have about him when you see him suffering racism or xenophobia in the middle of a mission. Nothing in his life has ever gone wrong, that's his image, destined to be king, he is supposed to have no weakness on his peers eyes.
He is not trying to prove people wrong, he is trying to prove them right; he isn't worthy despite their prejudice, on the contrary, he only tried to make himself worthy to fulfill their expectations. He can't be a woman or an immigrant or have a visible disability or any other thing that strays him from a perfect ideal by western society standards, and be that same character.
#Different from the other white character in the series he was never questioned or doubted#There's a presumption of perfection with no exceptions that society doesn't give to us (women poc immigrants visible minorities in general)#His privilege (handsome white man with no visible disability son of Zeus etc) also prevented anyone from worrying for his well being#This illusion/expectation of him having no weakness/being untouchable pushes himself too far and clouds his judgment.#I headcanon he didn't even consider the possibility of myopia because that wouldn't fit Jason Grace Son of Jupiter so it wasn't an option#And you think it'd be the same character after facing racism? Because ain't no way he'd be praetor without going through racism#I think I'd love him nonetheless since I'm very weak to the whole golden boy tearing himself to save the world but it'd be a new character#jason grace#I know racism in USA is different from here but I know how different a “non-racist” white person treats me and treats my white friends#Also for him to not be an entirely different character if PoC would be incredibly disrespectful and racist on its own#It would fail to recognize the difference in how we are read (and written). I hate that a lot.#I remember that when Cody told Brandi “I see no color” she told him “then you don't see me” and that's so fucking striking#We ARE different. treated differently. if you act like you don't see it then you also turn a blind eye to the violence that comes from it#This is straying from my point I got a bit heated banalization of things I care about usually does that to me#Point is please don't change Jason on the very few things that man actually bothered writing about him#I actually think this is true about Octavian too. A lot of what he is allowed to do would not be possible if he weren't a white man.#Same for Rachel Elizabeth Dare. I mean you can work around making her poc but it will truly be pushing A LOT#Let's put it this way: a woc doing a street performance is perceived very differently from a white woman doing a street performance.#Specially in the eyes of cops#Pjo
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A future fic carcass I'll write when I write (after I finish 9 ungoing fics)
King Viserys dies at the wedding celebration of his daughter, Crown Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen.
No one else does.
I am a firm believer Otto and Viserys are the rot on the face of the House of the Dragon and without these two everything would be fine-ish.
Unfortunately, we need Vissy T for his kids to be born, so Viserys dies soon after Aemond is conceived. Sorry, Daeron, not this time.
Joffrey doesn't die because he doesn't manage to provoke Criston before the king dies.
Rhaenyra overrules his father's decision and marries Harwin Strong.
Their son Jacaerys Targaryen is the heir to the throne, Lucerys Targaryen is the heir to Harrenhal.
Daemon marries Laena and lives at Dragonstone (Rhaenyra grants him that), their firstborn is the heir of Driftmark.
Laenor joins the Queensguard and is sent to Dragonstone to protect Prince Daemon (ha) and his future heirs.
Criston Cole becomes the Commander of City Watch while still retaining his white cloak (what? He did it in canon, can do it here).
Rhaenyra removes Tyland Lannister as the master of ships and appoints Corlys Velaryon (back).
When Baela and Rhaena are born, it is decided to betroth Prince Aegon and Lady Baela, making him future lord-consort of Driftmark (and successfully removing him out of succession of the iron throne).
When Jace is born, his and Helaena's betrothal is announced.
Baelon is born without an issue and the royal family meets at the celebration on Dragonstone, where Aemond claims Cannibal and loses an eye in the process.
(Kinslayer, everyone. It fits).
Afterwards Luke is sent as a ward to Harrenhal with his father. A huge ass scene ensures there Luke clings to Aemond and refuses to go.
Aegon makes a greasy comment and gets punched.
Both Aegon and Baela are sent as wards to Driftmark.
Lucerys still leaves.
Harrenhal doesn't burn bc even if Larys kills Harwin and Luke, there's still Lyonel and Joffrey in the equation. Lyonel keeps serving Queen Rhaenyra as her Hand.
Years later the royal family meets at the wedding celebration of Baela and Aegon, where Luke and Aemond behave very much like Rhaenyra and Daemon at Rhaenyra's not happened wedding.
Rhaenyra and Alicent clutch at their pearls, Rhaenyra suggests father died because of seeing something like that.
Daemon asks if she implies they killed Viserys, then asks where is Baelon.
Laena replies Baelon is playing knights with Joffrey.
Rhaenyra and Harwin Strong (no) have three more children, Aegon, Viserys and Visenya, all silver-haired like their mother (her uncle).
Laena is fine with it, they have a poly. Laena doesn't have more children because Baelon's birth was a ghasty one.
Baelon claims the Grey Ghost.
Otto is never called back to the capital because (suprise!) Rhaenyra didn't rush to kill her 3 y.o brother or the other one who was born after Viserys' death. Instead she marries Aegon off so he's no threat.
Aemond eventually joins the Queensguard and is appointed to the future lord of Harenhall.
Lucerys refuses to marry and appoints his brother Viserys as his heir, who marries Visenya. They have a very good life in Harrenhal.
The reason Luke skips over Joffrey is because Joffrey is always at the sea (with Baelon), and Aegon the Younger is bethrothed to Baela and Aegon the Elder' firstborn, Laena.
Everyone lives happily ever after, Otto gets to be the head of the house Hightower after he successfully plots against his own kin, since his blood is secured on the throne, if in unconventional for him way.
He once tried to manipulate Aegon, but was cut off sharply by Rhaenys and Corlys, who kind of adopted the boy as theirs.
Aegon enjoys wandering about Essos very much, he, of course, whores around, but he and Baela have an agreement. One of Baela's children is born from Alyn of Hull, but no one is any wiser, since everyone just thinks the child looks like her.
Jacaerys and Helaena have three kids, Jaehaerys and Jaehaera and then Maelor.
Jaehaera is oldest and so is the heir.
Oh, and Rhaena is happily married to Corwyn Cobray. They have a daughter, Rhaenys.
#hotd#hotd au#queen rhaenyra#hotd fanfic#fuck viserys#i will write it one day bc i have such a vivid image of the scenes such as: viserys' death. rhaenyra overruling her father's decision#explaining it and trying to mediate it so Corlys wouldn't start another war#'i thought it was in the tradition for the king or queen to marry their hand's child'#the greens' FACES at that#rhaenyra gathering Laenor and his entire fam and suggesting queensguard#“but then he won't be able to wed a woman. have a family-”#-exactly *Rhaenyra and Laenor lock gases. she nods. he nods.* -i accept#Aemond just fucking WANDERING AWAY TO CLAIM THE SCARIEST ASS DRAGON THAT IS THERE#the total panic then Laenor finds him and brings back with EYE LESS. (he almost got to the castle but fainted mid way)#corlys trying to push for baelon as the heir and laena&rhaenys being: “NO”#the unspoken kinship in the house of whoring around. Harwin being like “i support my wife's wrongs” and loving egg vis and visenya as his#NO ONE KNOWING THEY'RE NOT HIS. LIKE LEGIT THEY COULD BE HIS OR HARWIN'S. EVEN RHARNYRA DOESN'T KNOW#aegon living his best life as a sailor and explorer#Aemond looking at Laenor and being like “i can do that too”#laenor living THE BEST LIFE by his sis and her husband/his friend's side. and Joffrey is ALIVE#criston eventually getting over himself and accepting that Rhaenyra indeed couldn't run away with him#like imagine if they run away and then vissy t died#whoops i guess#also i just realized i accidentally made it so that Harrenhal is eventually ruled not by Strongs but Daemon's kids#lmao i guess#They are Targaryens (tm) your honor#the amount of dragons they're about to have...like harrenhal has 4 just with luke aemond and visx2#Dragonstone has 3 even if all kids scatter about#cobrays have 2 (Rhaena's and her daughters)#driftmark has at least 3 and then Laena is born and its 4
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idk how to phrase this but like. people retroactively calling Fleabag a privileged, dissociative portrayal of feminism which is Bad, Actually, are lowkey deranged to me because, yeah, Fleabag IS about the expierience of womanhood. but like. through the lens of ONE woman? like, nowhere in the show is it ever implied that fleabag's expieriences are supposed to be universal, relateable core pillars to womanhood?
its almost like half of the population of the world is female and I think it's kind of weird that all stories about women always have to be feminist and activist, and can not just be an exploration of an imperfect woman, they have to be correct about *all* of womanhood?
i also think that the people saying this don't really understand the character of fleabag and i do think that the show is feminist in many ways, but even when no person working on this show would have had any intention of making this a "feminist story", i think that would have been their right to do that?
breaking bad, fight club, american psycho, lolita, etc. all tell the stories of white men who are objectively horrible people. and these stories still treat these characters with a level of empathy and understanding of how they got there and why they are like that. the stories don't excuse their behavior because of that, they are simply a fictional analysis of a person who is not virtuous or good in a lot of ways.
but women, people of color, disabled people, and other minorities are never given the same right to just tell a story about a character, the character has to be virtuous, a good role model, a representation of their whole group, likeable, flawed only in an "unproblematic" way, never make a bad decision, and its insanely limiting in what stories can be told by writers, when they want the approval of the general audience
and i so genuinely want more fleabag women, who may interact with feminism, but who are actual human beings in a real world, who have real flaws and who can be selfish and cruel, but who are still treated with empathy by the story
#myposts#anyways fleabag my beloved#like this 'fleabag is a bad feminist' yeah so? she says that as one of the first lines in the show#like does that make the show bad or what lmao#and like i LOVE the 'we're bad feminists' scene bc#like this woman asks who in the audience would give up time of their lifespan to have an ideal body#and only fleabag and claire raise their hands but genuinely you cannot tell me that no one else in the entire rest of the audience#would want that. like the woman in the front asks for a reason and that reason is that a lot of women would want tha#because they are socialized to be concious about being attractive and desirable and fleabag and claire are being honest#im not saying ALL other women in the audience lied but some probably did. right?#because they actually do want to look like 'good feminists' who are wholly unaffected by living in a patriarcal society#do i make sense? idk
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one of my major problems with my job is that I get sososo tired of trying to figure out how to interact with people in a way that is honest, productive, but also doesn't bruise anyone's egos, and I can feel myself getting worse at it as time goes on and it's genuinely what drains me and stresses me out the most by far
#thoughts#personal#I am sooooo wary of being banished back into the Bitch Corner#part of me feels like it's inevitable (and probably some neuroatypical behavior honestly)#that the longer the collaboration goes on and the more I feel defeated in advance at the notion that these people will end up hating me#but trying to pull out before this actually happens will lead to people not understanding why I'm backing away#and also hurt my reputation in a way#tired tired tired#not to go all sjw on tumblr dot com (the audacity!!) but#wonder how less of a problem that would be for me if not woman-adjacent in games#I mean don't get me wrong I would be a Horrible Person if I had received amab socialization I have zero doubts about that#but#yeah like a lot of the time the reason why I get shoved into the Bitch Corner is because I reacted to bullshit I did not start#but the way I react becomes more important than what I was reacting to (I have Very Bad examples of that in mind)#I've been called a living shotgun recently in a way that wasn't entirely derogatory and even a little appreciative?#and the thing is that do sound like me (oh no) and I would appreciate and own that descriptor I think#if the notion of being perceived as harsh and bossy didn't fill me with absolute dread as to how I'll eventually be treated#how people will eventually feel like it's okay to treat me because surely I must have deserved it at least a little#so#idk don't love that being a constant in my career so far!!!!#sorry I'm just being very Panic Attack Trigger Happy since a couple of days#doesn't bode well for the year to come
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yeah upon more thought. a little worried abt the wicked movie.
#mixed feelings on ariana grande.#i'm not blocking the movie's existence out of my mind anymore at least and im excited that it may have potential to be cool#if they don't fuck it up and the recent movie musicals are not reassuring me that it won't get fucked up#but partially i am hoping that bc its WICKED one of THE musicals of all time that they won't ruin it that much#but either way the movie does LOOK good visually i think#i'm hoping it's just that the teaser was short but glinda's character in particular is really worrying me#specifically as she's played by ariana grande. it looks a bit like she's Conventionally Attractive Sophisticated Woman (by 2024 standards)#rather than the bubbly obnoxious sociable and honestly immature (at least in the beginning) character she is in the musical#maybe i'm just worrying too much bc the trailer IS short and honestly seems to just show hype for#the Big Dramatic scenes mostly#eh. it's a commercial. of course they're gonna show the hype stuff.#just deeply deeply hoping they don't fuck this up bc i love wicked with my entire being and i would hate for it to be a shitty movie#bluebird.txt#also if they cut march of the witch hunters i will riot#actually ill riot if they cut any single song#you're making this musical into a two part movie. You Can Afford To Put Every Song In There.#don't be cowards please let this movie actually be good 🙏����🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼#wicked
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OC RNG stuff.
-Lucinda is engaged to the oldest prince in a family of nine where there are 8 brothers and then the youngest is the only girl. She adores her future husband.
-Ink Blot is a really dumb mage who acts as a street performer using fake magic despite being an actual mage. He just wants to be the center of attention.
-Ruby and Luce are from the same plot (thank you RNG I love the dream wardens). They're part of different pairs and basically just patrol to keep dreams in check. Ruby and Luce also don't really meet each other in canon. Their routes don't overlap but they both interact with the main duo which is Colette and Marcus. (Ruby wants to beat Marcus up while Luce wants to kiss Marcus for what it matters.)
#i really love luce hes just so calm and collected in front of marcus and colette to try and look reliable#but hes actually one of the younger wardens who is made to replace his partner's old partner#so hes with sil and sil is just watching him for the first decade like why is he so awkward#when will he warm up to me or the other wardens he meets why is he always so tense#and then something happens and luce is sent into a panic because he learns that marcus used to laugh with sil and the retired warden#hes like ???? WHY DOES HE HATE ME ? WHAT DID I DO? and sil is like the guy is older than me and doesnt do change well#thats all there is to it he got used to my old partner and youre a wrench in the comfort zone hell get over it tho#and when marcus laughs for the first time in front of luce it is SO over for luce he would do anything for marcus#but then you get marcus who is telling colette i have to say things took an unexpected turn with sils partner#i went from fine with robert to being abandoned by robert to do you think luce is cute cause i think hes cute#and marcus is very much IM SO GAY which is fair cause colette is like MM YEAH SAME#and then you guys gotta realize i love my silly lil prince group where the oldest bro has a really cool future wife#and then the second oldest is like hey bro im stealing your wife for the afternoon and lucinda is like i see i see#and then the second oldest and lucinda just spend the entire afternoon dancing and shes happy to indulge him#then the third oldest is the original main one where he and the castle witch are on a mission to help another kingdom#but like the fact the oldest has an arranged marriage with a woman he loves#and the second youngest is in love with the son of two castle aids#who happens to be 40 and very worn out with stress from having to turn the second oldest down all the time#then the third oldest has a crush on a prince from the kingdom hes trying to help but the crush is on like an 18 year old#so the 2nd and 3rd oldest are constantly bickering over what the other sees in their crushes#anyway hi i love my ocs (gestures to them)#and ink was a really minor character in the plot bc it was mostly me paying attention to a dumbass vampire#and this thief who had to help the dumb vampire get home bc he has no sense of direction and had been abducted
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