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acciostorian · 4 years

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mae reads the kane chronicles: the serpent’s shadow the red pyramid

(aka we see mae go through many emotions in the space of 2-3 days)

holy fuck ive only got to the contents and the chapters have those classic pjo click bait titles i’m so happy rn

WAIT IM SUCH A FUCKING IDIOT- the serpent’s shadow is the THIRD BOOK. uh-oh i almost fucked this whole series over lemme change the book real quick....

i’m literally on the first page and i’ve already been sent on a mission, so the kanes are THOSE bitches

SADIE AND KANE ARE BRITISH???? omg yes please

THEYRE IN LONDON MY HOME

never fucking mind they’re from LA

oh wait sadie was raised as a british kid. that’s very sexy of her.

carter be like, “you wouldn’t be interested in my dad’s lectures.” SHUT UP CARTER I WANNA KNOW MORE ABOUT EGYPTIAN PUNISHMENT

so sadie was raised in east london???? THATS SO SEXC BECAUSE ME TOO BOO

sadie has a british accent. a b r i t i s h a c c e n t.

FIT

“six years in london and she thinks she’s james bond” LMAO

sadie’s so emo/alt i love it. does rick always write his characters like this??

sadie pronounces it “mum” and carter says “mom”

it’s so refreshing to read mum ngl

sadie said bloke omg

i’m feeling carter’s pain. little sisters are shits and honestly sadie has the same vibes as my little sister and me and carter are quite similar. i hate this.

oh wow they really said sadie was too white for their family...

sadie did not HESITATE to be like, “yeah dad we’ll lock that guy in his office. mint.”

sadie telling the story is an experience

sadie said “maths” and “mates” in the same sentence. this is some refreshing shit.

sadie’s friends saying carter is hot is fucking hilarious. like it’s a classic piss-off to thirst over your mate’s sibling

THEYRE GETTING DEPORTED????

LMAO AMOS WAS LIKE, “yeah we don’t talk about manhattan. they’ve got their own problems. *cough percy jackson cough*”

i read thoth the god of knowledge as thot the god of knowledge

carter is right, amos has undeniable swag

philip of macedonia. the crocodile. cool.

i love how the greeks and romans be like “if we don’t honour the gods we’ll get SLAUGHTERED” and the egyptians are like “you know what? fuck the gods me and my homies hate the gods”

sadie kane would stab you in a back alley and dance to mcr as you bled to death and carter kane would take you to a museum, tell you everything about everything and then commit a terrorist attack

amos really went “don’t touch anything, the cats in charge and peace out bitches” and then fucking jumped off the balcony of his five storey mansion

sadie made that door go BANG

that fucking clay statue came to life and not one of them screamed. I WOULD SHIT MYSELF.

i’m giggling, all the greek/roman gods have really long/scary/cool sounding names like tartarus and chaos and nyx but the evilest guy in egyptian myth is called set. S E T.

please make muffin some crazy badass animal like crookshanks or swiftwind.

WHO DARES THROW HANDS WITH PHILIP?????

THE SHABTI FUCKING STOLE AN ARTEFACT THATS AMAZING

i love carter sm, even tho he’s scared as fuck he still picked up that ancient sword and was like “ig i’ll bash some heads in whilst sadie holds the cat”

MUFFIN JUST TURNED INTO SOME WARRIOR CAT LADY AND SHE INSTANTLY GAVE ME CATRA VIBES

every cat in new york is helping them

bast jacked that car like it was nobody’s business

i used to think the greek gods were stupid for having so many things to control but honestly the egyptians are taking the piss, do you really need a whole scorpion goddess?

the kane siblings are written so well. like i actually BELIEVE they’re siblings

i think carters gonna become a comfort character now... like i relate on another level. little siblings always take the spot light and you have to act level headed and calm because the younger ones start shit and you’re like “i gotta be the good one because my family would fall to shit if i didn’t behave.” so big kudos to carter, i love you

so carter’s a king huh? I DIDNT NEED YOU TO TELL ME THAT RICK I ALREADY KNEW HE WAS

zia was like “king tut?? ugh he was such a boy, there were waaaaay cooler tombs out there x x”

i read “nectanebo II” as “nintendo II” and i was like ??? when was that a thing

i drinking camomile tea whilst reading this and i feel so peaceful uwu

sadie really can do magic like THAT like bitch be like “i just copied what zia did and yeah it worked lol”

okay so i’m sorta feeling bad about sadies life rn but i’m still very pro carter

set’s laugh makes me uncomfortable. because when most villains laugh it’s usually described like “their laugh was like a knife, cold and sharp. i hates it.” but when sadie discribed set’s laugh she was like “it was warm and friendly. beautiful.” LIKE AAAA THATS A RED LIGHT

set: the god of theatre because gods dam is he a good actor

sadie saw some hot emo guy and was like “omg marry me”

iskandar be like “lmao imma speak in alexandria greek all the time but this girl bouta die? i switch to perfect english for dramatic effect”

woooOooaaaah SLOW DOWN THERE BUDDY, tongue tattoos???

zia: you guys will probably suck at this at first but oh well we all can’t be great

sadie: *makes fire first time* wooosh

sadie and kane: *doing cool shit* me and my tea: sluuuurrrp

bast is so sassy i love it

me when it’s a sadie chapter: okay ig :/

me when it’s a carter chapter: HOLY SHIT CARTER HEY OMG YOURE DOING CRAZY STUFF???? COOL. i love you.

bast: so yeah, you’d be stupid to teleport to paris, this is desjardin’s home territory

sadie and kane, lying in the streets of paris: oh cool cool

sadie: like i might die rn but i don’t care, as long as it doesn’t get filmed and put in youtube, that would be embarrassing

like ???? sis get your priorities together smh

sadie: *sees hot emo guy again in her spirit adventure, he hints that’s he’s dead or something*

also sadie: so will i see you again?

“no, an egyptian drink. you’ve heard of hot chocolate? this is rather like hot vanilla.” dam now i want some.

carter is an amazing older brother. he’s written perfectly and he’s a great character to relate to for me. even though sadie can make his blood boil, he dropped everything to calm her down when she was panicking about not being able to change back from a bird. i too have to do that for my little sister - sadie and ava are ironically the same age - so i find that very comforting that there is someone like me to relate to!

‘a businessman with a rolling suitcase was waiting by the doors. his eyes widened when he saw me. i must’ve looked pretty strange — a tall black kid in dirty, ragged egyptian clothes, with a weird box tucked under one arm and a bird of prey perched on the other.

‘“how’s it going?” i said. “i’ll take the stairs.” he hurried off.’ LMAO THIS IS WHY CARTER BABY I LOVE YOU

highkey pissed that carters like “i’m always edgy around the police. once i turned eleven they started giving me the Look. when it doesn’t happen it’s always a pleasant surprise.” LIKE FUCK NO HE SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO WALK AROUND UNHASSLED WHATS WRONG WITH HIM

lmao bast be like “imma jump off this national monument. see ya at the airport in my finest clothes and jewellery x”

FOOD UPDATE: i’m eating a chocolate covered waffles and having some tea and i feel so happy rn sorry i know you don’t care but like aaaaaaa

bast called carter her little tomcat and my heart exploded

bast really likes convertibles huh

thoth: i hate rereading my old writing, my present self would never write like this now!! SOMEONE GET ME A RED PEN

are they... are they going to dig up elvis presley?

might put some elvis in for this part, y’know, to set the mood?

i cant stop reading ‘thoth’ as thot even though i know how to pronounce it

the captain with a axe for a head: my name is bloodstained battle axe 😸

yuh bast did some shit ...

imma stop now because spoilers, GO READ THE KANE CHRONICLES THEY ARE THE MOST UNDERRATED RIORDANVERSE BOOKS X X

#the kane chronicles #tkc #carter kane #sadie kane #tkc bast #mae waffles #rick riordan #riordanverse #did someone say queued?

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standfortheangels · 4 years

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What song makes you feel better?what’s your favorite candle scent?what flower would you like to be given?say three nice things about yourself (three physical and three non-physical).what calms you down?what’s your ideal date?how are you?what’s your comfort food?do you still love stuffed animals?what’s something you do to de-stress?hugs or hand-holding?morning, afternoon or night?what reminds you of home (doesn’t have to mean house… just things that remind you of the feeling of home)? [for mun

What song makes you feel better?

Ooo, this really depends on a lot of stuff. But weirdly, one song I go to a lot is Tubthumping by Chumbawumba. The names really tell you the vibe of the song >w>' it's silly- too silly to really take much seriously when you're listening to it, so it gradually cheers me up that way. But it's mostly the chorus bit that does it.

"I get knocked down, but I get up again! You are never gonna keep me down!"

Repeated over and over again with pride and happiness like a football chant.

It's the kind of mood that's just infectious, it's a crowd celebrating something, enjoying where and who they are. Pair that with the message in those lines, and, I dunno. It just really helps me~

what’s your favorite candle scent?

Oh this one is tough. My sense of smell isn't that great, usually I can smell a candle if I pick it up and sniff it, but when it's lit I don't tend to smell anything. There are very few candles I can light and smell in the room. So I tend to just pick candles based on colour tbh x'D

One thing I do love though is oil diffusers. A few drops of violet essential oil in the water, it comes out as steam, makes the place smell really nice.

What flower would you like to be given?

Aww, that's a cute one~ I'd love to be given any flower really, but if I have to pick... I'd say a sunflower. I think it'd be really funny to have someone pull this giant flower from behind their back and hand it over. X')

Say three nice things about yourself (three physical and three non-physical).

That's six! You can't fool me there >w> buuuuut fine.

Physical: I like my eye colour, I've got a general hourglass shape that I like, and I'm told I have very comfortable shoulders to lean on? Haha

Non-physical: I'm fairly intelligent, have a lot of patience when I need it, and I'm pretty weird, which is often funny for other people x')

What calms you down?

If I'm anxious, I have a few apps on my phone I can use that usually help. 'What's Up' is a great one, it has different tools you can use like grounding exercises and retargeting your thoughts and stuff. I also have games on there like Zen Koi and Alto's Odyssey, which I find relaxing. They're not too complicated to manage but they do grab my attention and have chill music on them.

If I'm calming down from being angry.... Dogs. I find if a dog comes up to me for a hug or something, I have to relax my muscles more, I have to be gentle with them and reassure them that it's all okay, it's like a conscious effort I make for their sake. So it puts a stop to my stressing out long enough for me to just start enjoying the fact that I have a dog. ^^

What’s your ideal date?

Ooo good question...

At the minute I can't really date at all with my health being this bad, so I'd probably go for a casual date where we play a low-pressure game together at home. I'm talking battleship, tetris, any Super Mario game that has a multiplayer feature, Snipperclips, Jenga, Wii tennis, anything. Just us chilling, having a little bit of playful rivalry maybe, a few healthy snacks~ that would be awesome. Some of these games we could even play from two separate places with a video call going, which would mean I wouldn't have to push myself to host or leave the house or even force myself to shower in advance; I could even stay in bed and just prop myself up with some pillows if I really needed to, take a laptop and we could go play something online maybe.

In the future though (because I really hope I'll improve eventually and get some of my life back) I'd still love the more casual fun dates, but not stuck inside. I'd love to go minigolfing and be terrible at it so we can both laugh at my awful shots, and I'll do some hopeless ironic trash talk and then lose by a mile~

I'd like to have a dog we can walk together. We could go to a quiet beach, which will probably be cold and muddy because it's England but we'll let the dog loose and smile at how much fun they're having, maybe play fetch or something, and then at the end be so so grateful that we thought to put old towels over the back seats of the car for our very very happy, very very very wet dog~

It'd be fun to go to a theme park together, or walk around a garden centre and plan out a garden we'll probably never get around to. Or a zoo! That'd be a great date place, a zoo, or SeaWorld, both are good.

I'd like to go for ice cream and sit on some random grassy bank to eat it together. To go to an art gallery with a camera and most of my photos would just be of my date seeing something she likes~ maybe I could even take a sketchbook too, and I could draw her in the styles and/or poses of whichever pieces she wants me to, while she poses in ridiculous funny ways and makes me laugh so much that I have to stop and then we move to the next room.

I've been too ill for too long and had so much emotional crap in my life, I wouldn't choose the rigid restaurant dates with all the same rules and the pressure, or strive to try and be the most romantic couple or whatever else.

For me, what I'd value most is being able to get out of the house and enjoy the world, and having a date with a light-hearted atmosphere.

How are you?

Tired as always! X') but for real, today has actually been okay. The last few days have been really rough pain-wise, but it hasn't been quite as bad today, so hopefully it'll ease off back to normal from here~ I've also been pretty productive in the last two days so I'm very happy with myself rn ^^

What’s your comfort food?

I have a couple! Chocolate, of course, is a classic one (chocolate peanuts in particular are something I reach for for comfort). And also, a hot pasta-based meal like lasagna or, heck just pasta in a nice sauce will do. Those meals are more like the comfort of being warm and homely, the kind of thing I might love if I were really tired and feeling sorry for myself, while chocolate peanuts are the "I'm upset so I'm eating my feelings" food. X')

Do you still love stuffed animals?

Of course! I don't have tons all over my bed purely because it's inconvenient, but I do keep two huge ones- a dog and a shark- on top of my wardrobe, and my littlest childhood friend is always in my room somewhere~

His name is Scruffy, and right now he's sleeping in my crystal box (open) on top of all the empty velvet bags. ^^ I used to take him everywhere, cuddle him every night as a slept.. he usually smelled pretty gross because I never wanted to give him up to be washed, haha X) thankfully he doesn't have that problem now~

What’s something you do to de-stress?

This might sound lame but, jigsaw puzzles. It has to be real ones, at the table with some music in my headphones. If I can't do that for whatever reason, I go to the bathroom and run cold water over my wrists for a minute or two, over the veiny side. It's kind of a mini cleansing ritual. I sometimes combine that with some deep breaths and imagine the water is literally washing the stress out of me, and it really does help. It's something I can do quickly and easily, I can just do it while or after washing my hands or something and that's that~

Hugs or hand-holding?

Hmm... prolonged, I'm not a huge fan of either? Eventually if you're holding hands it's like, when do you let go? What if your hand gets warm and clammy, or sweaty? Same with like a cuddle. Once you're in it, how do you say "hey I'm kind of uncomfortable now, this physical contact has gone on too long"? You don't want to be rude, and it might be hard to explain, so you've probably got to blame on being too warm even if you're not, and then that's a lie, and.. it's just awkward.

A regular hug though, that's okay. It can last longer than usual and still not be a problem, because at least, you know, you won't be hugging for half an hour, at some point soon you'll let go. And it feels nice, you know? From someone I care about and trust anyway~ it's like a physical way of saying "I love you" and it's nice to have someone's arms holding you, to wrap yours around them and just hold them tight.. you both feel warm inside and secure and wanted. I wouldn't be keen on a hug from a stranger or an acquaintance, even a new-ish friend. But someone who's close to me? All the hugs. Give me the hugs, let me hug you back, many many hugs. X)

Morning, afternoon or night?

Night! Actually I love those really early mornings, you know when the air still has that kind of... Crispness to it. That is amazing. But I'm never awake for that anymore.

(^▽ ^;)ゞ

What reminds you of home?

Thunderstorms, loud planes overhead, chinook noises, soft hugs when I'm upset, mum's cooking, pictures of our old dog Harvey, little fluffy dogs running about.

Most of this is easy to figure out I'm sure, but I do want to talk about the first couple.

Until the age of 11 my family lived on a military air base, so there were always big planes taking off and landing, and I really do mean always. We learned the difference between some of them by sound. I could be sat at home and we'd hear one and know, that had to be a Herc landing (landing always sounded different to taking off), or a teacher would have to stop talking at school to let one go by, and everyone knew that one was a VC10. (VC10s are the LOUDEST thing I have ever heard to this day. I'd probably still recognise one now~)

We also saw and heard Chinooks a lot. Now for anyone who doesn't know, those are the weird helicopters that have two... Fan parts? I don't actually know what they're called. X') (I looked it up, they're called rotors!) They kinda look like the bit of a retro telephone that you'd pick up and hold to your face.

Now having two rotors means that they can carry a Lot of weight, but it also means they don't sound like normal helicopters do. The two rotors are timed out so that the blades from each side can go through the same middle space without hitting each other, Left blade then right blade then left then right then left, and you can kind of hear it happening. Instead of the kind of 'Wubbubbubbubbubbub' of normal helicopters, a chinook sounds more like 'Wokka wokka wokka wokka'.

Where I am now, we only hear some small jets once a week at most when they take practice flights, and sometimes a normal police or ambulance helicopter. It took me a long time to get used to the quiet of most places, and sometimes I miss all the overhead noise we had back then.

And we got so many thunderstorms! Every single summer, usually at night. Now that I think about it the pollution from all the aircraft might have been involved in this too. >w>" But I loved it. We'd all gather in mum's room and open the curtains wide to watch. My little sister was scared of thunder back then so it was better for her to have people around and to make it fun. I was always just excited! And I still get that way if I hear thunder now~

#wow this is a long post #i actually fell asleep a couple questions from the end #ive just finished it off this morning #haha #ooc #mun stuff #asimplerper

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winstonhcomedy · 6 years

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How’d Winston Do This Weekend? 11/2-11/3

What a wild and wacky weekend of wonderful comedy!!! We had a twofer on Friday in Petersburg, and then a bit of a road trip for a shit show at Smith Mt. Lake on Saturday!!!

I love a twofer. Two sets in one night. It’s especially rare when the show isn’t in a huge city. The fact that Petersburg had two shows on Friday is kind of ridiculous, but I am definitely not complaining.

The first was the Off The Rip Improv Showcase at Plaza Mexico Bar and Grill run/hosted by my buddy Mu Cuzzo. I think it was Mu’s first time running a show like this which is pretty neat. I hit him up before the show and asked for a spot. He put me on and let me go first so I could make my second show.

I get there early and get to hang with Mu, his dope girlfriend Paula, and Bryan Williams. I knew Paula before I knew Mu. She used to come out and support a bunch of comedy shows. She’s a pretty dope artist as well. She is a poet, a writer, she makes jewelry, and there’s probably a lot more I’m missing as well. She’s a good influence on Mu, and supportive af. I always enjoy talking to her!

Mu is in a super good mood, because his mom is coming to watch him perform for the first time. This is a super dope moment to watch. When his mother gets there Mu hands her a bouquet of flowers (it’s her birthday) and gives her a huge hug. Shit like this gets me teary eyed. Small stuff like that really touches me in a crazy kind of way.

Mu’s mother is a pretty strong, and awesome woman. Mu told me she’s on city council and when city council tried to knock down city worker’s pay by 10% she told them to take all of her pay. This is a bad ass move. It show’s she gives af about the community, which is rare as hell nowadays.

Had to talk to Bryan about staying in his lane. Bryan is a good dude who means well, but he sometimes gets involved in some stuff on fb he really shouldn’t. I think arguing about stuff on FB is super annoying and pointless (even though I’ve done it.) I just advised him it’d be best to mind his own business and keep his head down and just write/tell jokes. He’s so new he doesn’t need the reputation of a White Knight or argumentative dude on FB. It was about some personal stuff going on in the comedy scene rn so I don’t want to go into it, but it was a good talk.

The room itself is pretty big and spacious. There is a weird divider in the middle of the room. The DJ is set up on one side, and the comics perform on the other. There is a pretty good crowd there, but because the room is so big it doesn’t feel super intimate. Also there's a table of about 11 people behind us that you have to turn around to see. It’s an odd setup, but it works.

Mu went up first and did a good job getting the room ready for comedy. Since the microphone was wireless and he knew a lot of the audience he walked out into them a little bit and did his thing. He got his mom involved a bit, and warmed up the room nicely.

I go up first and have a pretty solid set. I only did crowd work. It did not have the vibe of a crowd that would be into my material. I only did about 5 minutes since I was a guest, but I got his mom involved and his cousin. I had some pretty good lines, and got some big laughs.

All in all I’m glad I went to the show. I’d give my set a B-. After the set I hopped in my car and drove straight to Wabi Sabi.

Wabi Sabi is one of my favorite comedy rooms. It is usually hosted/run by Jason Klingman. Tonight Kenny Wingle was hosting since Jason was at the Brian Wilson concert in Richmond.

This is a room set up for comedy. It is in a basement, has low ceilings, tight seating, brick wall backdrop, separated from rest of the restaurant, and usually has a good crowd. This is not an easy room by any means, but they do reward funny. You have to be willing to work for your laughs. They like jokes and crowd work.

I’ve had some of the best sets of my life at Wabi and I honestly think it’s a room that has made me into the comic I am now. I’m not afraid of any room, and it really helped me build my confidence while doing material or crowd work.

When I got to the show Alex Castagne was on stage and he had a hot one. The room was full, and he was slaughtering. Alex is a funny dude, and a good friend. A real fine jew of a boy.

He gets off and Joshua Horsford goes up. Joshua has been in and out of the comedy scene for a long time. He started well before me, but he also writes/acts so there are times where he is absent from the scene for months. He had a pretty good set and Kenny went back up and did some crowd work in-between him and the next comic.

Next up is Patrick Nowaczyk one of the members of Rich Girls comedy. A comedy troupe that isn’t really doing anything anymore but was full of some of my favorite comics when I started. Pat started out super strong. He was really killing up top, but then he got into some of his longer jokes and they either didn't get them or just didn’t have the attention span for them (which sucks because he did two of my favorite bits he does).

He gets off stage and since it is late about two tables get up to leave. Which is always disconcerting as a comic who is going last on a show.

Bryan showed up to hang out after his set at Mu’s show. When he got there he asked for a guest spot. Kenny came up and asked if it was ok if he went in front of me. I didn’t give a shit. Bryan’s five minutes aren’t going to affect me.

Bryan goes up and really does not have a good set. He caught them when he got on stage, but after that he really let their lack of laughs get to him and he got more and more timid. He just had no confidence and they just weren’t his crowd. After his set about half of the remaining tables leave.

Kenny goes back up and does a little more crowd work to get the crowd back and excited again. Luckily the tables that were left were great audience members.

I go up and just go right into crowd work. They are vibing with me and my energy right away. I do about 25 minutes and I can honestly say I did one joke in the middle (and it worked).

The audience members left were amazing. I had one of the best sets I’ve had in a while. I was jumping back and forth between two large tables of guests, calling back to crowd work, and really getting weird and intimate.

Talked about sex with a mom/dad in front of her daughter who was celebrating her birthday. Talked to another lady about how much she loved to be choked. I had a lot of lines I can’t even remember, but it was a super fun and hot set.

I’d give it an A- and maybe even bump it up to an A.

It was so much fun, and really glad I was booked on this show. After the show I hung with the guys a bit, and then Klingman showed up. We talked about the Brian Wilson show, and I asked to be on next month’s Wabi show (it is the 9th year anniversary and I didn’t want to miss it.) Afterwards I headed home.

Saturday was a fun day. I got to wake up late, and hang out with my niece which is one of my favorite things to do. I also knew I had a good hang on the horizon because I was driving to Lynchburg to meet up with my dude Jake Snyder and ride with him and Paige Campbell to the comedy competition at Heath’s Waterfront Grill at Smith Mtn. Lake.

Once I get to Jake’s we got and grab a bit to eat at Wendy’s next to his house. Someone asks him how tall he is (6′7) and they then reply with, “that ain’t too bad”. I don’t even begin to know wtf that even means.

Paige gets to his apartment and then we hit the road. We are jamming to older metal on the radio, and it legit feels like we are comics in the 80s. Three dudes crammed into a car, driving into the middle of nowhere for some dogshit show and a chance at $250.

We have done this show before, and it actually wasn’t bad. I had a super hot set and won some money. They had us on a real stage, and it was pretty packed out. Definitely more fun that it had any right to be.

This time we show up. The sound system is shit, there is no stage (they have moved us to the corner), very little audience, and the energy is weak af in the room. We all know it is going to suck.

The good thing is there are definitely some folks I love to hang with here. Johnny Camacho (Roanoke comic), Kristinia Montouri (Roanoke comic), Colby Knight (lynchburg/charlottesville guy), Zach Webb (lynchburg comic), and a few others idk at all.

The host Phil Hogan goes first and he just gobbles dick for like 15 minutes. Like it is brutal. Barely any laughs at all, and really isn’t vibing with the crowd. After him he brings up a comic Ron Hebert who also bombs. The next comic is Melissa Douty. I have never seen her before, but her reputation precedes her. She is a local headliner/touring comic. Super likeable and a good joke writer. She has what I consider the best set of the night.

I go up next and in my opinion bomb. I got some good pops, and about 3/4 of my jokes work. I try to engage the crowd, but they aren’t having it at all. I also keep stepping out of the light because it is poorly placed and bright af (I get points deducted because of this).

The best part was in the middle of a setup to one of my jokes that needs people to pay attention a man who has to be 80 rolls in on his mechanical wheelchair. He is making what I can only describe as a comical amount of noise. He is knocking his wheelchair into tables, and the hostess is talking so loud asking him where he is going to sit. The whole time I am just on stage delivering a joke people don’t want to hear just trying my best not to yell at this old dude. HE WHEELS ALL THE WAY TO THE FRONT!!! On the inside I am dying laughing. It felt like it was out of a tv show.

I’d give my set a C-. I just didn’t have it that night.

Melissa Douty comes over and we both compliment each others sets. I definitely respect her as a comic. Super funny lady check her out.

Everybody else goes up and honestly it feels like everybody is bombing. Paige and Jake didn’t do great but also the crowd was shit. Johnny Camacho goes up and does a German Psychic character (that I enjoy) and gets a few good laughs. Lastly a 16 year old kid goes up with a notebook and he does ok. Not bad for a first set ever, and he had a few good ideas.

They are adding up the scores at the end of the show while the host goes back up and plays guitar for an obscene amount of time. We are hanging out in the back and 16 year old is one cocky dude. You can tell he thinks he is a comedic genius. He is trying to bust balls, and be goofy. He asks me if my legs are ok because my jeans are too tight (brilliant roast). A little later he says he’s a bit sleepy because he did a bunch of heroin, so I responded with, “yea and after your set I just wish you had Od’d.” He heard me, but he didn’t respond. He also quit busting balls after that. He did have some funny shit so I hope he continues to go out and work on new stuff. His parents were there, so it was cool to see them support his dream.

They announced Johnny Camacho as the winner. Which blew me away. Not because he isn’t funny, but just because Mellissa Douty got more laughs than all of the other comics combined. I’m happy for Johnny because at least a hack didn’t win, but I felt bad for Melissa because for that room she kind of freaking crushed.

We head back and stop at Sheetz to grab some food. We park back at Jake’s place and start doing our favorite street jokes. Then we all go our separate ways. I head home and start playing tf out of Red Dead Redemption 2! Which is how I spent the rest of my weekend.

WHAT AN AMAZING TIME BAYBEES AND LAYDEES!!! I love you a lot and will catch up with you soon. Keep on trucking everybody! xoxoxo LOVE YOU!!!

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