yoooo halloweekend was fuckin l i t (this whole thing at least borders on vaguely-nsfw-ish)

~~Friday night~~

ok so i thought i was only gonna be seeing bf saturday night to sunday, but he got out of work friday night with nothing to do so we went to see the new blade runner movie (super good btw, i cried) and when he was driving me back home he was like “hey wanna grab your swimsuit and we can go back to my house and go in my hot tub” and i left my swimsuit in my dorm bc i forgot to grab it so i just grabbed gym shorts and a t-shirt bc why not and i had nothing else anyway

so we get back to his house, it’s like 1:30 in the goddamn morning (blade runner 2049 is almost 3 hours fair warning) and we get into the hot tub and for a little bit we just talk about normal stuff like school and friends and stories and the movie

and next thing i know we’re making out. I don’t know how it got to that point but i do know that he instigated it (!!!) and it gets a little blurry after that point but next thing i know his hands... start wandering... down my back and sides and i tense up. This motherfucker just chuckles and goes “what’s wrong?” and i could hear the smirk in his voice. I... didn’t even provoke him or hint that I wanted him to tickle me but gdi he knows. he k n o w s and i honestly wonder if he knows it’s a kink or not but more on that later.

So we’re in the hot tub and his hands are getting braver and he stops purposely doing the light/teasy tickling and then he squeezes my ass and I squeak becAUSE APPARENTLY I CANNOT CATCH A BREAK FROM BEING TICKLISH LITERALLY ANYWHERE OH MY FUCKING GOD.

He laughs again and k e e p s  a t  i t. holy fuck. so we’re making out and he’s tickling me and i’m in heaven but then he moves to my thighs and ok. I know i don’t know my worst spot but. Jesus. My thighs are really fucking bad ok. And now he definitely knows they’re really bad b/c they’re so far the only place that nearly sends me into a panic. 

So far they are the only place where I have grabbed his hands and actually pulled them away because it was almost too much.

Moving on usually I’m the one to say “I missed you” but he said it during a lull. He also said “I love you” out of the blue at one point and... I don’t think he’s ever said it before? Like he’s said “I love you too” a bunch but...? i d i e d . 

His hot tub also has colored lights in it that you can change and we started it on blue, then later on changed to green, then about halfway through set it to red and left it like that and JEFMSKEDAJKWEMD HE WAS TICKLING ME AND SAID “looks like your face is as red as the lights” and i just “...it’s not...” “oh really?” “...yeah it’s just the lights...” and god that killed me... (it wasn’t just the lights)

So yeah friday night was a movie and then an hour and a half of talking and splashing and making out w/tickles and comfortable silence in his hot tub and it? was amazing.

Also? As I was dying: “Just wait until tomorrow night when you’re in my bed.”

~~Saturday Night~~

Ok so this was the night i had been waiting for. This was the night of the party, where I was gonna sleep in his bed and we were gonna fall asleep in each other’s arms. Sound cheesy? Yeah. But I’m a hopeless romantic <3 I couldn’t wait.

So the party winds down, everyone who isn’t spending the night has left, and he and I join one of our friends in the hot tub for about half an hour. I go inside (in the same makeshift swimsuit from the night before) to dry off and get into pajamas. He comes in about ten minutes after me, and we climb into bed. Not much happens at first.

So this time, I instigate. I start playing with his hair as he’s wrapped around me. I start kissing him, and it takes off again. Now since we’re laying down it’s much easier for him to run his hand up my side and pull me into him. Again, he does this unprovoked, which I am still amazed at. So i tense up, he chuckles again, same routine. But it doesn’t last as long. But I’m not satisfied yet (of course) because he said it’d be even more than the previous night.

Well.

Me being a little shit mentions that. It gets a little blurry from there on until he slows down his hands and he stops kissing me and I manage to whisper “people are sleeping we have to be quiet,” he replies “that we do,” and I finish it by saying “then don’t make it so I *can’t* be quiet!”

he: “oh now you asked for it.”

and he began actually tickling me almost-fully while i tried as hard as i could not to laugh, opting for covering my mouth with my hand and basically letting out breathy (BUT QUIET!) laughs into it.

and a minute or two later after he stopped, you know what that fucker said, in the most amused yet teasy tone possible?

“Good job.”

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING MEEEEEE

JESUS I DIED THEN AND THERE I THINK

i tried tickling him back at one point and it didn’t work well bc he’s not as ticklish as i expected goddammit so he ended that attempt pretty quick

other things that were said include:

“someone really missed what we had going last night”

“you just keep directing me here” (referring to how i kept moving his head to my neck b/c jesus FUCK neck kisses make me weak and 8 times out of ten tickle really badly)

he said i was like a baby at some point friday night for whatever reason while we were making out and i was like “are you sure because you seem like the one who needs constant attention” and he was like “don’t pretend you’re not loving this” and i just couldn’t argue with that lol

“i thought you liked being touched!” at one point referring to how i, ya know, kept flinching every time he hit a sensitive spot and i don’t even remember how i responded

remember how i said "i honestly wonder if he knows it’s a kink or not but more on that later”? well it’s later.

ok so, like, most of the times he tickled me this weekend were unprovoked. Very few of those unprovoked ones were accidental, aka he knew exactly what he was doing. And the fact that most of times overall either led to or were during making out... also when he found out that it tickled when he squeezed my ass he kept going... a lot... it took a long time to get a break from that lmaooooo. Also the more he did so the more handsy he got... the more his hands wandered to my inner thighs... and that spot not only is an absolute death spot, i’ve also figured out that it’s a massive turn-on there. Now, earlier this evening he was teasing me a lot and it turned sexual and... like... he brought up tickling when he was trying to fluster me more and ...

shit. maybe he has a kink for it. That would make a lot of sense... anyway i think he’s either very close to figuring out i have one or he’s figuring out he has one for being a ‘ler or both 

god

i love halloween

5 things meme, tagged by @binegan, thankie thankie :D

5 things you can find on my blog:

1. Thirst, mostly gay thirst more specifically

2. The Walking Dead, comics and show and game

3. Jeffrey Dean Morgan appreciation

4. Ships, dude, so much shipping

5. Supernatural, occasionally, but staying away from metas and discourse

5 Things you can find in my bag:

1. Wallet

2. Keys

3. Phone

4. Books and papers for class (only when I’m going to class ofc)

5. Food (same as above)

5 Things you can find in my bedroom:

1. Drawings I’ve made and two a friend mailed me

2. Lotta books

3. Things I’ve bought while doing tourism in other countries

4. Fandom stuff like funkos and replicas of Harry Potter wands and the (not so) only ring. Also a collection of knives which includes a katana

5. A framed poster of Blade Runner, my fave movie

5 Things I’ve always currently wanted to do:

1. Have an easier time socializing, being less self-conscious, don’t close myself to people, date, be kissed, all those things

2. Go to a con and meet actors I like

3. Meet friends I’ve made online

4. Find something creative to be really, genuinely passionate about.

5. Live off doing something I love

5 Things I’m currently into:

1. The walking dead as a whole

2. Negan and regan

3. Writing and getting validation

4. Occasional drawing

5. Kingdom hearts’ OST

5 Things on my to do list:

1. Develop my art

2. Write and post stuff, gdi, I’ve been lazy long enough

3. Rewatch TWD

4. Play The Walking Dead A New Frontier

5. Get fit, or at least lose the tummy

5 Things you may not know about me:

1. I discovered sexuality through fanfics when I was less than 10 and everything I’ve learned about it has been through internet. My ideas about it were kinda off for some time and hey I turned out fine so the whole protect the children thing tumblr has going on is bullshit

2. I got run over by a car when I was, I dunno 10? Cracked a bone a little, but other than that I was fine

3. I have a big brown shapeless birthmark on my right leg

4. I went to a catholic school until I was 16. Nowadays I hate it with a burning passion

5. I live in the hottest, or one of the hottest, zones of Europe and I hate heat and have never seen snow

and now imma tag @grimephilia @accidentaldogdad @bluepatient @holyjeffreydeanmorgan @anxious-thinking-sweetheart @neganstonguething @hatterized @hazardousxy @milarca @lafitte 

#13

1. What is your middle name? Sharleen. 2. Do you have any nicknames that aren’t derived from your actual name? I don’t. 2. Do you have any allergies? i’m allergic to msg that’s in most Chinese takeaway foods - not diagnosed or anything, but I cannot eat more than a few bites without feeling sick, shaky and sweaty, which generally takes away the enjoyment haha. 4. What is the longest your hair has ever been? above the bottom of my back. 5. How well can you write in cursive? I've been told I have really nice, neat handwriting, and I like writing in cursive, so I suppose quite well. 6. Name one item on your bucket list. I want to visit New York at Christmas time. 7. Have you ever been on a blind date? never. 8. What is the oldest piece of clothing you still wear and how old is it? I have an atl tshirt from their gig in 2009 but I don’t wear it anymore. 9. How often do you eat out at a fancy restaurant? before this i’d eat out at normal restaurants about once or twice a month, but never really FANCY places. 10. How grammatically correct are you when you text? i’m quite bad for being really grammatically correct, and autocorrect usually changes shortcuts for me as well. 11. Can you drive stick? I love getting to a certain question in these things then realising it was written by an American haha; yes I can drive stick. 12. What foreign country would you most like to visit and why? I've been to both italy and spain, but italy was around venice so i’d like to visit rome, and the last time i was in Barcelona i was about 7 or 8 years old, so i’d like to go there as an adult. 13. Nutella or peanut butter? Nutella!!! 14. At what age did you have your first kiss? like, 19. 15. DC or Marvel? please; marvel. 16. Have you ever hosted a wild party? no, and if you knew me you’d know why that’s so funny to me. 17. Name/author of the last book you read cover to cover. Do you recommend it? harry potter and the deathly hallows by she who shall not be named; and yes, i’d recommend the story but not the author. 18. How many of your Facebook friends do you actually hang with? legit, 4 or 5 at most. 19. Have you ever donated blood? i’m not allowed to, but I would if I could. 20. From 1-10, how much do you like decorating for holidays? 20! 21. Coffee or tea? if I had to pick; tea. 22. What is your go-to Starbucks drink? their strawberries and cream frappuccino drink, that’s always nice haha. 23. Last show you binge watched? me and my mum just finished seasons 1-5 of how to get away with murder on Netflix, and I accidentally spoiled s6 for myself by reading one of the actors insta’s. we can’t get s6 yet so I need to wait for Netflix, gdi. 24. Dogs or cats? dogs. 25. Favorite animated Disney character? Rapunzel is my fave. 26. Have you ever cooked a big family meal by yourself? yeah, I love cooking. 27. Favorite winter activity? ohhh, visiting Christmas markets. 28. Have you ever butt dialed anyone? a few times. 29. Can you blow a bubble gum bubble? yep. 30. How early in the year do you start celebrating Christmas? outwardly? as soon as my household allows it, but inwardly? October 31st after our work disco’s are finished hahah. 31. What emoji best describes your life right now? the facepalm one, the see no evil monkey one, the crying one and the crying laughing one. 32. Are you fluent in more than one language? I know a bit of French but i’m not fluent. 33. What is the longest you’ve ever kept a New Year’s resolution? I don’t even make them anymore haha. 34. Have you ever successfully been on a diet? Did you gain any of the weight back? no haha. 35. Are any of your grandparents still alive? my dad’s mum is still alive, but I don’t speak to her. 36. How good are you at communicating through facial expressions? very good. 37. Have you ever gotten a commercial jingle stuck in your head? all. the. time. 38. Have you ever left a movie theater before the movie was over? no and I take pride in that fact, despite actualy sitting through the newest fuckin’ blade runner movie. 39. Do you consider rapping singing? it’s a form of it, yes. 40. Does your home have a fireplace? yes. not a real one though haha. 41. Favorite non-chocolate candy? ooft… the only thing I can think of is peach heart gums. i’m not really a gum/candy sort of person. 42. If you could have only one superpower, what would you want and why? invisibility - you could literally sneak in anywhere. 43. Have you ever locked your keys in your car? nope. 44. Do you listen to any religious music? no. 45. Do you drink soda? If so, which one is your favorite? diet irn bru is my fave, but I do like a draught diet coke or pepsi max. but they have to be draught. 46. What was your ACT score? idek what that could be. 47. Rice or quinoa? basmati rice, mmm. 48. From 1-10, how good of a driver do you consider yourself? like, an 8 or 9. 49. Do you like horror movies? I love them but I also hate them. 50. How easily do you cry? all it takes is a tv advert really. 51. Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where? I have a lily on my right thigh, an anchor on my left wrist, pawprints just above my right ankle, and on the top of my left calf I have a butterfly, and my right is a wasp. 52. You are hanging with your closest friends. What are you most likely doing? if it’s a night in, eating pizza and chilling or a night out also eating pizza in one of our fave bars and then going to our fave club after haha. 53. Can you handle spicy foods? What is your spice limit? I can handle sort of moderate spice but nothing too hot. 54. Can you play any musical instruments? If so, which ones? in school I took lessons for guitar, bass, keyboard and vocals in school but don’t anymore. 55. Are you more introverted or extroverted? I N T R O V E R T. 56. Last CD you bought? wake up sunshine by all time low. 57. Do you like roller coasters? LOVE them. I was in the car earlier and we were on the motorway so I shut my eyes and pretended I was in a theme park hahaha. disclaimer: I was not driving the car. 58. What day of the week is laundry day for you? whenever I need to do it. 59. Have you ever played spin the bottle? i have, but we played it as truth or dare, not having to kiss the person it lands on. 60. How long have you known your best friend? 15 years. 61. Can you eat using chopsticks? i can but it takes me forever and it’s an embarrassing time for all involved. 62. Do you have any stickers on your laptop computer? If so, what are they of?  no, i’m too anal to ‘ruin’ the look. 63. How often do you say y'all? only ironically. 64. Favorite flavor of ice cream? depends on the day, usually just vanilla or maybe raspberry ripple. i love mint chocolate chip too though. 65. How long was your longest relationship? Are you still with that person? hahaha, I've never been in a relationship. 66. Star Trek or Star Wars? trek (but only the new chris pine ones). 67. How good are you at math? fairly good.  68. Have you ever acted in a play or a musical? in the school nativity shows when i was aged between 4-10. 69. How often do you read/pay attention to your horoscope? only if i come across it do i read it but usually just to slag it. 70. What is the shortest your hair has ever been? when my mum gave me what was nothing short of a RIDICULING bowl-cut sort of hairdo. 71. Have you ever broken any bones? never. knock wood. 72. Do you like to go fishing? nope. 73. Do you believe in evolution? yes. 74. Favorite costume you wore for Hallowen? How old were you? i’m always partial to a cat, from when i was young to now, but my favourite was a witch which i used a few years running for disco’s in work. aged 20-odds. 75. Real or fake Christmas trees? real. 76. How many pillows do you sleep with? five. my head goes on one and the rest go around and about my body. 77. Do you live in an apartment or a house? house. 78. How many of your friends are of the opposite gender? none. 79. Have you ever had a near-death experience? no. 80. How long have you been at your current job? 8 years. 81. What kind of car do you drive (year, brand, model, color)? my dads HAHA. i used to drive a silver Renault clio before i got rid of my car. 82. Have you ever been fired from a job? nope. 83. Have you ever ended a romantic relationship? i mean, i ‘went out’ with someone for like a day then ended that, but i wouldn’t call that a romantic relationship. 84. Phrase you say the most? i say the word bangin’ a lot. 85. Have you ever kissed anyone of the same gender? If so, did you like it? little pecks, not a full-on kiss though. 86. Do you eat meat at all? i do but I've gone off it more and more. 87. Do you like fast food? love it; god damn you covid. 88. Have you ever given anyone CPR? thankfully no, although i am fully trained to do so. 89. Have you ever learned to do anything from a a how-to video on YouTube? yeah, mostly like, how to braid hair etc. 90. Describe your sense of humor. dry, sarcastic, dark, self-depreciating. 92. Favorite cereal? i don’t really eat cereal much, but i do like frosties. 93. Have you ever auditioned for a reality competition show? no. 94. Have you ever been in the audience for the taping of a TV show? no. 95. Do you believe in ghosts? i do. 96. Do you think there is life on other planets? i think so. 97. Have you ever given money to a street performer? i don’t remember. 98. Your deepest fear? the ocean haha. 99. Pancakes or waffles? waffles. 100. Are you still friends with anyone from high school? my only friends are my friends from high school. 101. From 1-10, how good of a dancer do you consider yourself? the lower end of that scale haha. 102. How much of a patient person are you? i’m really patient, but I've been known to lose patience quickly sometimes. 103. Do you know your IQ? no. 104. Do you own any homemade clothing? my friend knitted me a snood a few years ago for Christmas. 105. Do you own any clothes from a garage sale or a thrift store? i don’t think so. 106. Have you ever bought anything from a flea market? nope. 107. Have you ever quit a job? no, but I've been on the verge for years haha. 108. Have you ever gotten a song you dislike stuck in your head? all the time. 109. Any movie(s) you can watch over and over and over again and enjoy just as much each time? easy a, harry potter, Disney, literally any of these. 110. Have you ever gotten a TV theme song stuck in your head? yeah. 111. Have you ever skinny dipped? nope. 112. Are your birth parents together? they are. 113. Do you or have you ever worn glasses? I've been given glasses before which had the weakest prescription, but that was in the run-up to me being diagnosed as diabetic, so i reckon it was more to do with that. 114. Favorite type of cookie? milk chocolate chip. 115. Have you ever been broken up with? again, no relationship. 116. How often do you smile when getting your picture taken? all the time. i get nervous haha. 117. Have you ever accidentally dialed 911? no. 118. Oldest memory? i remember my sister being born when i was two. 119. Have you ever been the victim of a nasty prank? in school people would go about chuking those snapper fireworks, or would tape tacs to the ends of pens and stab people in their legs or arse; folk would call those pranks but i just call that stupidity. 120. How often do you snort when you laugh? not often. 121. From 1-10, how good of a singer do you consider yourself? people tell me i’m more towards an 8 but i’d say a 5 or 6. 122. Favorite Disney song? ohhh, i love i see the light from tangled, but i also really love i just can’t wait to be king from the lion king because it’s so fun. 123, Where do you see yourelf 10 years from now? hopefully finally being a teacher. 124. What is your Myers-Briggs personality type? isfj. 125. Have you ever had a fortune cookie fortune come true? well, we once went to a Chinese restaurant to celebrate me getting my degree and the fortune cookie was related to hard work paying off or something, so that’s about as true as they have ever been for me. 126. Name one thing you wish people would stop posting on social media. happy heavenly birthdays. bane of my LIFE. 127. Last musical artist you saw live? the Jonas brothers! (it should have been 5sos, but that and McFly were both rescheduled. up yours, covid). 128. Credit cards or cash? cards. 129. Favorite fandom? i flit between but i love the harry potter one. 130. What is your astrological sign? aquarius. 131. How flexible are you? i used to be soooo much more flexible. 132. Any hidden talents? i’m sort of crafty but it’s not really a hidden talent. 133. Can you surf? no and i’d hate to try it. 134. What motivates you to do well in life? i’m not really sure. 135. Your worst physical feature? all of it? 136. From 1-10, how much are you like your father? physically i look more like my dad but i act more like and get on better with my mum. 137. How lucky do you consider yourself? very. 138. Name a moment in your life when you were pleasently surprised. when i guy i liked liked me back (however briefly). 139. Have you ever been summoned for jury duty? never, and it’s so weird and slightly upsetting to me because my degree is in criminology. 140. What type of shoes do you wear the most? trainers. 141. Favorite summer activity? going out to parks or zoos with friends. 142. Favorite song to sing in the shower? depends on my mood! 143. Have you ever lived with a roommate you did not get along with? yeh, i moved into residential halls in uni and i didn’t speak to any of them. 144. Have you ever lived on a farm? nope. 145. Have you ever kept a diary or a journal?  when i was younger. 146. TV show or movie you quote/reference the most? anything Disney, or shrek. 147. How often do you get mad at yourself? a lot. 148. Have you ever gotten any stitches? no. 149. Have you ever been hunting? NO. 150. Favorite YouTube channel? i don’t really watch youtube. 151. Have you ever had a pet besides a dog or a cat? we’ve had fish, hamsters, rabbits, birds and gerbils as well as cats and dogs. 152. From 1-10, how well do you work with others? 8 or 9. 153. Are you friends with any of your exes? i have no exes. 154. Apple or PC? pc (but apple for phones). 155. Do you collect anything? concert tickets. 156. Have you ever seen any Broadway plays or musicals? not actually on broadway, but I've seen the lion king in Edinburgh and the cursed child parts 1 and 2 in London. 157. Any missed opporunites you wish you had taken? yep. 158. Have you ever uttered a spoken hashtag? yes haha. 159. Do you have a pool at your house? no, it’s Scotland, we’d freeze to death. 160. What is the longest you’ve gone without sleep? two and a bit days. 161. Last thing that made you laugh? question 159. 162. Disney or Nickelodeon? Disney. 163. Name one celebrity you wish was still alive. alan Rickman. 164. From 1-10, how much are you like your mother? physically, not much, but i’m more like her in personality. 165. Your best physical feature? eyes (or eye, seeing as one can’t really be counted as functioning at the moment). 166. Earbud or earmuff headphones? bud. anything else infects my piercings haha. 167. Have you ever wished you were born the opposite gender? i think most people might have thought it when they were younger, cos i did, but not truly. i know that can be a difficult idea for some to deal with. 168. Do you have any piercings anywhere besides your ear lobes? I've got three helix piercings. 169. How often do you wash your hair? I've tried to do it less over lockdown because i wash it too much, but i used to wash it every two days. 170. Showers or baths? showers! baths mean you’re just soaking in your own dirt. i only take baths if i’m in a lot of pain, and even if i do, i have to take a shower immediately after. 171. Have you ever been a bridesmaid or a groomsman? I've been a bridesmaid once. 172. Bottled or tap water? i’m not fussed, but prefer bottled. 173. What was your favorite TV show when you were a kid? i loved tots tv and barney. 174. Any guilty pleasures you’re willing to discuss? nothing that i can think of, i openly love cheesy shit. 175. Favorite video game? i don’t play them now but i used to love crash bandicoot and spyro the dragon. 176. Have you ever gotten a New Year’s kiss exactly at midnight? nope. 177. How many of the United States have you visited? one - florida, two years ago, and we literally didn’t leave the Disney bubble. 178. Have you ever given money to a homeless person? i think so. 179. Have you ever gotten a surgery? a couple. 180. Your least favorite food? turnip and potato mashed together, YUCK. 181. From 1-10, how competitive are you? maybe 3 or 4. 182. Do you like wearing hats? i don’t suit them. 183. How much of a jealous peron are you? not really jealous at all. 184. What was your SAT score? not relevanttt. 185. Have you ever voted for a reality competition show? yeah but only the free ones haha. 186. Does anyone in your family currently serve in your country’s military? nope. 187. Snowboarding or skiing? I've been skiing once before on a fake ramp and i prefer the idea of two skis to one skateboard. 188. What celebrity would you most want to play you in a movie about your life? emma stone or anna Kendrick. 189. Have you ever been a Boy or Girl Scout? i was a brownie. 190. Have you ever dyed your hair? since i was 9 years old. 191. From 1-10, how good of a cook do you consider yourself? 7 or 8. 192. You have just opened up a web browser. What is the first site you visit? google. 193. How many things can you do with your weaker hand? what sort of question is that? hahaha. 194. Were you involved in any academic clubs in high school? nope. 195. Have you ever played hooky from school? yes, but with my mums permission so idk if that really counts as playing hooky. there was also one time that i literally walked out because i was so stressed and sad but i went back under an hour later lol. 196. Are you comfortable with watching rated R movies? yep. 197. Do you root for any sports teams? nope. 198. First thing you do when you wake up in the morning? check my phone then take my insulin. 199. If you could take home any one animal from the zoo, which one would you choose? a giraffe. 200. Tell something about yourself most people don’t know. no because i’m lazy and i just answered 199 questions about myself.