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undermattsun-archive · 3 years

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ushijima x fem!reader x kita | w.c 1.2k

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

a/n: omg ok so here’s my fic for the super cool + epic collab for my server ;)) i’m rlly nervous cus i’ve never written a. fic like this so pls don’t be mean!!!! but like pls leave a comment below <333 also don’t forget to follow me (or i’ll BITE U jk xD) omg omg ok and don’t forget to check out the other fics for this super epic hot collab <33333 right here kidnapped by hq !!!!!!

warnings: inane rambling, i literally did not proofread this i would take breaks and start again without checking what i wrote last so it’s defs not coherent

I was just ur every day kind of girl. Nothing special to anyone...not ev en myself. All i knew was wake up, brush my hair (and teeth obvi!!) and go out and go to university and to my part time job as a waitress ina diner where not a lot of people would go to. Anway today was one of those boring days, i woke up with my alarm blaring at 6:00 am because i have a class at 8:00 am… it’s my least favorite one too. But yeah so i got up super early and made myself apple cinnamon brown sugar oatmeal and black coffee bc i’m also kinda broke bc i ran away from home bc my parents were those snobby rich people and i didn’t wanty end up like that ya know? i put on a really simple outfit bc i was feeling lazy since i woke up late!

(we need to bring back sillly bandz! they r so much fun!!)

So i was walking to my early 8 oclock class all the way on the otherside of campus when suddenly ther e was a frisbee flying right at my face! I tried to dodge it but it still hit me right in the nose and i screamed so loud i didnt hear anything else but me screaming in really loud pain.

“Are u ok??” i grab my nose in pain but it doesnt rlly feel broken or bleeding so i open my eyes that i didnt evern realized that i had close to see rlly gold eyes staring down at me. I scrunch up my eyebrows bc im confused bc he’s wearing overalls and a straw hat? Did i hit my head or something and am now seeing things?

“I’m ok do i know u?” i ask.. despite him looking weird in his farmer outfit he looked familiar so i had to ask.

“Sometimes i go to the diner u work at after im done at the farm bc there are good mochi waffles (a/n omg wait do they serve mochi waffles at dinners? I’ve only had it from bakery xD)” he says with a really cool tone. I nod my head bc it makes sense. Before i can say thank you to him for asking how i am doing he grab my hand “please marry meand my cofarmer”

“W-w-w-what??????” i yell my heart is pounding bc even though he is really super pretty i don’t eevn remember him ever being at the diner and like i remember a lot of my customers faces bc a lot of them come back a lot.

“Marry us we will make u super happy pls it was love at first sight.” he says confidendtly (sp?) as he holds my hand tighter and tighter.

“I-i-i-i-i-i don’t even know ur name???” i whisper softly under my breath, “HOW can i marry u???”

“Shinsuke…..” a deep voice goes off behind me and i pull my hand out of his hand to look behind me, a big big BIG man stands there also wearing overalls and a straw hat and also a single wheat hanging from his kissable lips.

“Wakatoshi i have found the perfect housewife for us,, i have asked her to marry us.”

“But i’m just a normal girl from a normal world, how can i possible be apart of the world the two of you have made in the farm world?” the offer was amazing, the life of a housewife for these two perfect men that i’ve met by chance.

“She doesn’t havea choice the wedding is tonight ur marrying us.” the man who was called wakatoshi says with a very serious voice and facial expression. before i can ask hes suddenly pulling me to my feet and dragging me away.

“i have class!!” i say in protest as he continues to pull me towards a green tractor.

“you don’t need education…do you know how to sweep and cook eggs? and maybe make butter?” shinsuke asks following behind as wakatoshi pulls me onto the tractor.

“of course i can make eggs! but why butter?”

“we live on a farm darlin’ ya gotta know how to make butter.” shinsuke says and i nod my head. it makes sense.

“i can’t just leave my life behind tho i’ve gotten this far all by myself” i sigh even tho i’m comfortably sitting in wakatoshis lap i can’t let myself fall victim to their charms!!! i’m independent !!!

“give it up already your ours now…..” wakatoshi says seriously. i pout. he can’t just talk to me like that. i’m not a kid! i go to unverisity and have a job!!!

“it’s too late ur already wearing the engagement ring” i look down at my hand and gasp to see a beautiful ring on my finger.

“this cant be real?” i shake my head my head.

“we already have your dress and the venue ready.”

“what?” the big grrrn tractor pulls up to a really pretty outdoor wedding venue. my jaw drops to see my entire family, even my parents waiting.

“go in there” wakatoshi points at a tent and i nod. i walk over and am immediately being changed by two guys who look the same?

“don’t worry we r gay.”

“and twins.”

“but not gay for each other bc that’d be illegal or something and the author would get Cancelled™” it makes sense. i turn and look in the mirror and i gasp. i look beautiful. i may be an average girl but in this moment my velvet chestnut locks are curled to perfect perfection and the makeup isn’t too much or too little. these gay twins sure worked their magic!

i step out of the tent and look down the aisle to see my two farmer husbands looking handsome as ever (here’s what we look like teehee xD i know we look super cute!!)

“y/n, im sorry me and ur moms bitchy richness made u run away but please let me walk u down the aisle on ur wedding day.”

“hello my name is agayshi and i am also gay, and here to officiate your wedding.”

“wait ur gay too?”

“yeah i’m married to that guy over there in the wacky inflatable cars salesman suit but we’re both respectively fucjing one of those gay twins. any way. do you y/n y/m/n y/l/n take shinsuke canonical rice farmer and ushijima farmer au to be your lawfully wedded husbands?”

“i-“ i look between the two men. my dream wedding. my dream men. i look around at all my friends and family. i nod.

“yeah i do.”

“congrats you may kiss the bride” at the same time wakatoshi and shinsuke grab my head and manage to mash all 3 of our mouths together.

i’m just so happy.

….or so i thought.

i woke up, it all turned out to be a dream </3

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(a/n: hey everyone sorry for the sad ending but like...r there rlly happy endings in real life?? soz i just think we need to get more realistic w our fanfics </3)

like. comment. subscribe for more awesomesauce fics like this ;) !!!

#i hate it here #i rlly do #i created this environment but god #i am in PAIN #miki mouse whorehouse #kidnapped by hq #tw wattpad

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aprillikesthings · 7 years

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the return of: rewatch

Back to the Kindergarten! I’ve been looking forward to this. :D :D :D

Do you think I’m gonna rewatch this as often as I do the other Amedot-heavy episodes?? Probably. God, even when I was a baby in this fandom I remember realizing I’d watched Too Far at least six times when I’d watched the rest only once or twice. ANYWAY, here we go!

(LOL THIS TOOK ME OVER AN HOUR BECAUSE I KEPT GOING BACK TO REWATCH STUFF and I typed SO FUCKING MUCH STUFF)

Why does Steven even set an alarm? He doesn’t go to school? Whatever.

The three things he has to do in the kitchen sink now..... like, I reallllly don’t think he actually poops in the sink, that’s just....too much. (I think he does that at the car wash’s bathroom.) I mean we see him brush his teeth and wash his face and hair and I guess the assumption is that he pees in there? Maybe it’s meant to imply taking a bath, brushing teeth, and peeing? I DON’T KNOW. WHAT THREE THINGS IS IT. (”Just go in the ocean, bro! Pssht. Like a fish.”)

The whole “Peridot’s still sad???” implies it’s been more than one night? Thought Amethyst is not known for being patient with people getting over something. Like that time she cared the shit out Steven in Catch and Release: “I'm back to kidnap you! What, it's been long enough that we can joke about it, right?” “It’s only been like an hour!”

I love that she listens to country music. Several people have suggested it’s of the ‘my wife left me and she took the truck’ variety.

I’m side-eying myself slightly for having watched those goofy videos of the VA’s in the studio last December so many times that I recognize one of Shelby’s lines of mumbling. Actually on re-watching I have context for a lot of the random stuff we overhear during those videos.

God, Peridot’s face. I’m so glad they went for over-the-top here.

The way Amethyst mentions the other amethysts suggests she’s talked about the whole thing with both Steven and Peridot. “Now that I’ve met the neighbors” aaaah my heart!!!

Do think Amethyst forbids her from bringing her music because it’s depressing or because Amethyst dislikes country music? (I think it’s both.)

From now on I’m calling trains “clackity ships.” (Not really, but that’s funny.)

Their whole conversation about the famethyst is the best thing, especially the way it ends with “that’s pretty amazing, ‘dot!” and Peridot blushing. I’m going to rewatch it before moving on. Okay I’m going to rewatch it twice. (Okay, three times. Dang.)

I’m never over the fact that injectors look like bacteriophages (viruses that only attack bacteria).

It’s really interesting to me that Peridot and Amethyst’s views on kindergartens have literally changed places. (I made a separate post about that.)

This bomb has some gorgeous animation. Amethyst’s expression while Peridot talks about Kindergartens, the wind in her hair--it’s fantastic.

The line about “well, all the well-made amethysts are gone” I genuinely can’t tell if it was Peridot’s attempt at making a joke or if she’s just forgetting, in her grief, to not be mean???

“I’ve been hanging around this place for 5,000 years” okay but not full time??? I still wanna know how long she was alone there before the CG’s found her. “For a while, I guess, until I met your mom and the others” AAUGH TELL US. I know I’ve whined about how much I want an Amethyst flashback episode but COME OOOONNNNN.

Knowing that that flower was actually a corrupted gem.....do you think them touching it tickled.

NGL, the first time I watched this, the moment they decided to plant stuff there, I was like “there’s no fucking sunlight this is gonna be a horrible disaster.” I mean, if a place on earth is capable of sustaining any life you have to actually work at preventing it. I saw Mt. St. Helens the first time only about fifteen years after it had erupted and places that had been completely burned and covered in boiling mud and ash were already covered in small plants and shrubs and things. Even deserts and tundras have active, delicate ecosystems.

IIRC the tractor was in the barn when she moved in, but where did she get gas for it and seeds and stuff? Do you think Peridot and Lapis had an allowance from Greg? Did they sell Morps?? Can you imagine Lapis and Peridot at a gas station? At a farm supply store? (There’s a hilarious fic in there somewhere.)

This whole flower planting montage is the best, even knowing what comes after. They’re so cute I can’t fucking stand it. And Amethyst and Peridot both do the “tongue out when making effort” thing (which I do, too; sometimes) and This Kills The Woman

Where did Amethyst get the flamingo tho

Hhhhh the way Amethyst looks at Peridot and says “oh yeah?” to keep her talking I know this is my OTP and I have my shipping goggles on but YOU GUYS. Peridot’s doing her little “I’m explaining a thing” body language and tone of voice, and Amethyst thinks it’s adorable, and you’ll never take that away from me.

They still took the fucking train. Do you think the conductors on that route talk about them. (True story: I used to know people (okay lbh white cis dudes) who did train-jumping. It’s illegal and people who work for train companies are not very nice when they catch you, but if you manage to hop on a freight train and not get caught it’s certainly a cheap way to travel long distances--as long as you don’t mind living outside with no source of water or place to use the bathroom other than what you bring with you, especially since nobody leaves those car doors open anymore because of train jumpers, so you’re stuck jumping onto those platform cars with no walls or roof. I think I’d rather just pay to be on a passenger train, but you do you.)

Hydrangeas change color depending on the acidity of the soil they’re in. Sometimes they’re purple and sometimes they’re pink and sometimes they’re a super pale green. I have no idea if the crewniverse was trying for some kind of symbolism or just thought it would be fun to make Amethyst say “hydrangea.”

Ugggh even knowing how heart-breaking it was to see the dead flowers it’s still hard to watch. Poor Peridot. I wonder if it was just lack of sunlight or if the soil itself is toxic--I wouldn’t be surprised.

Peridot’s tantrum might be melodramatic but I can understand it. I think being actively angry and venting her worst feelings is still probably better for her than being flopped over in the bathtub. “We might as well just throw it in the garbage and toss ourselves in after, because it’s all just hopeless trash!” Like. Big mood, okay

The genuine regret she feels in that tiny short moment after stepping on the “flower,” though. I wanna hug her.

THE ARM TONGUE GRABBING HER AHHHH ahaha insert a vore joke here

Smoky’s little star wink is so great.

“I need to go to the bathroom” LOLOL (yes I know she means “so I can mope alone” but c’mon)

I just noticed the guitar music while looking at the sunflowers is an instrumental of Don’t Cost Nothing. Also plenty of other people have already talked about Peridot’s little speech here and their convo after as a metaphor for her friendship with Lapis etc. so I won’t bother. I will point out that after Steven jokes about her green thumb (does she even get the joke tho) when Peridot yells “I know that!” she has the fangy teeth. Nice. (Wait, did she have that during her tantrum in the Kindergarten? I forget.)

And then the snuggle afterwards. Yesssss.

#back to the kindergarten #su

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turquoisedragonmaster · 7 years

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Here have a bunch of my Transformers OC’s. If you wanna draw them feel free I guess. Just credit me.

NAme: Inkjet

Gender: Mech

Species: Cybertronian

Altmode: Black 2017 Mazda MX-5 Miata

Faction: Autobots

Appearance: Inkjet is a smaller, somewhat round bot, with a completely black frame. He has blue optics and his headlights are yellow and function as his way of speaking. His neck is scarred and mangled, as he was tortured by the Decepticons, which caused him to lose his voice.

Personality: Inkjet is not much of a fighter, and he prefers to let others fight. He is emotionally connected to a human named Ruth, and will protect her at all costs. Curious about human culture, he enjoys listening to the radio and communicates through morse code or his radio.

Special Features: Mangled neck, Autobot symbol on left shoulder

Weapons: Tattoo needles, Pulse Cannon

Other:

-I was really worried he’d be too much like Bumblebee but he’s not

-Soft boy

-He’s a sweetheart

-He still believes there's good in Decepticons despite what they did to him

-He’s a member of Team Screenshot (Which consists of him, Feedback, Teal, Turquoise, Spectrum and Slickshift)

-Too pure for this world

-Help him

-Amazing tattoo artist, he was in very high demand

-His morse code is normally slow but when he gets scared or excited it goes really fast and nobody understands it except for Ruth (She has like… Cybertronian enhancements that allow her to understand it)

-His favorite Earth animal is the Snapping Turtle (WHY)

NAme: Feedback

Gender: Mech

Species: Cybertronian

Altmode: Orange Lamborghini Gallardo LP560-4

Faction: Former Decepticon, Currently an Autobot

Appearance: A broad shouldered, rather tall mech, his orange plating is bright against gray undertones, along with doorwings. Numerous scrapes and scars. His optics are purple.

Personality: Feedback is nervous around others, his past makes him think he’ll hurt anyone. Massively overprotective, he fights with little control, and has psychological issues. A lot of them.

Special Features: Autobot symbol is clearly overlaid over the Decepticon one of his left doorwing.

Weapons: Dual pulse blasters, stasis dagger

Other: GAYYYYY

-Kinda an asshole

-He trusts nothing except Team Screenshot

-Which is like trusting a mamba

-His nervousness makes him trigger happy and that makes Teal nervous

-Cannot be trusted around explosives

NAme: Turquoise

Gender: Femme

Species: Cybertronian

Altmode: Turquoise Carrera GT

Faction: Autobot

Appearance: Turquoise is not an extremely big femme, nor is she small. SHe is actually reasonably sized, and you probably wouldn’t notice her if she wasn’t BRIGHT TURQUOISE. She had doorwings, which move constantly. Her optics are dark blue.

Personality: Derp master extreme. Accidental badass, who is super smart but talks/acts without thinking. Her underlying aggressiveness is undermined by her insane loyalty.

Special Features: Autobot symbol on chest

Weapons: Sword, double mini blasters

Other: Smokequoise. Turqstorm. Jazzquoise. SHIPS

-Has a huge dumb crush on Jazz in every universe ever

-Smokescreen and her are more platonic than anything

-Teal and her are extremely close (TOUCH HIM AND I'LL MURDER YOU)

-She’s an okay person

-Loves Earth music and Animals

-She likes using the groundbridge to go places and see different animals.

-Ratchet thinks she’s crazy

-Has ADHD

-Her front left tire falls off hen hit just right. She keeps saying she’ll get that fixed but she never does.

-She fishes in her spare time.

-She caught a shark once (In Australia)

-She has an alligator she keeps in the garage’s basement. His name is Godzilla.

-She has a dog too, his name is Smokey

-She tries to flirt with Jazz but he’s oblivious.

-Whenever Jazz comes around she blushes super hard and tries to keep calm and fails

-OMFG REPTILES

-She loves reptiles with a passion and protects them

-She’s a cryptid among poachers it’s just like this giant blue robot comes out and kicks their butts and takes the animals

-Nobody believes them b/c she has an EMP generator so they can’t get pictures ;3

Name: Teal

GEnder: Mech

Species: Cybertronian

Faction: Autobot

Altmode: Teal 2007 GMC Topkick 4x4 Pickup

Appearance: Teal is FREAKING HUGE, rivalling Optimus in size. He is quite bulky, looking very fierce despite the fact he’s not a fighter. He. like Turquoise, had doorwings and blue optics.

Personality: Teal, like his spark-twin Turquoise, is easily distracted. He is quite powerful, but prefers to leave the fighting to others. He is insanely loyal, and very aggressive when those he cares about are threatened

Special Features: Autobot symbol on chest

Weapons: Twin pulse cannons, Warhammer

Other:

-loves birds

-So much. Birds are the greatest

-Birds love him too. At any given time there's at least three birds hiding in his plating

-Sometimes he opens his doors in alt mode and sparrows fly out and Ratchet screams

-A big soft man

-Highly protective of his little sister (Even though she’s the older one)

-Makes weird squeaky noises

-Loves tractor pulls and cows and just being in rural areas

-He’s so gentle it’s amazing

-Ratchet came out to the back of the garage to see him in recharge in a field surrounded by cows with birds perched all along his shoulders and was like ‘Teal why are you like this’

-Teal regrets everything he did as a warrior but the birds make him feel better about himself.

- ‘Turquoise what the fUck’

The twins make fun of Ultra Magnus constantly like the giant children they are

Name: Spectrum

GEnder: Mech

Species: Cybertronian

Faction: Autobots

Altmode: Turquoise and white F1 racecar

Appearance: In build, Spectrum is a lot like Turquoise, small, with aerodynamic plating and the family doorwings. He is white with turquoise racing stripes and biolights on his doorwings edges. His optics are bright green.

Personality: Literally the stereotypical ‘cool dude’. He says things like ‘totes rad’ and ‘YOLO’ and fingerguns a lot. He annoys everyone.

Special Features: Autobot symbol on his lower abdomen (Like Bumblebee)

Weapons: Twin laser pistols.

Other:The Bluetwin’s cousin. Do Cybertronians have cousins?

-Legendary weirdo

-What the fuck

-I love his design tho

Name: Bonebiter

GEnder: Mech

Species: Cybertronian(?)

Faction: Decepticons

Altmode: Off Road vehicle of unknown make

Appearance: Bone takes the form of a hyena, with spines creating a bushy mane on his back and large, powerful fangs. He is silver with darker grey accents and red optics.

Personality: Bonebiter is the literally epitome of being a jerk. He’s mean, crude, teases both friend and foe, and is rude and sarcastic, even to those who he KNOWS could beat the shit out of him. He makes horrible snide comments about EVERYTHING, and he’s unbearable.

Special Features: No robot mode, Decepticon symbol on right side (In hyena and vehicle modes)

Weapons: Extremely strong jaws, claws

Other:

Name: Blizzardburst

GEnder: mech

Species: Cybertronian

Faction: Decepticons

Altmode: F-16 fighter jet

Appearance: Blizzard is white with pale blue accents on his torso and wings. A rather lithe seeker, he had red optics with orange speckled in them.

Personality: Cold, harsh and brutally effective, he has no qualms with killing, or changes in leadership. In fact, all the otehr Decepticons are afraid of him, with the exceptions of Soundwave and Megatron. Even Bluebolt gives him a hasty respect.

Special Features: Decepticon symbol on wings

Weapons: Rocket launchers, ice missiles (Like TFA Blitzwing)

Other

Name: Slickshift

GEnder: Mech

Species: Cybertronian

Faction: Autobot

Altmode: Diesel Truck. A Blue one. With sparkles.

Appearance: Slick is around the size of Ultra Magnus, so is by no standards small. He’s a big buff dude, with kind green optics.

Personality: Cinnamon roll. He’s a sweetheart,and all of Team Screenshot will MURDER you if you so much as look at him wrong. He’s not much of a fighter, and is actually a bit of a crybaby

Special Features: TALL BOY, Autobot symbol on chest

Weapons: Mace

Other: Poor baby

Name: Fasttrack

GEnder: Mech

Species: Cybertronian (Former Stunticon)

Faction: Decepticon

Altmode: Green F1 Race Car

Appearance: He’s a skinny lime green asshole with bright fucking red optics.

Personality: He’s a jerk. That’s it. He is rude to everyone, literally gives nobody respect, not even MEgatron, and its remarkable he follows orders.

Special Features: Weird fin things on his arms, Decepticon logo on chest

Weapons: Twin energon blades

Other: he’s totally crushing on blizzard but blizzard gives no fucks

Name: Cobalt

Gender: Femme

Species: Cybertronian

Faction: Autobot (Former Decepticon)

Altmode: f-22 Fighter Jet and Dodge Viper

Appearance: Cobalt is dark blue (Although not navy, just normal blue) with wings and pedes not unlike seekers. She is set like a sports model, although some Seeker traits do shine through, most notably in her wings, pedes and helm.

Personality: Cobalt can be quiet when around strangers, although when she is comfortable she is loud and energetic. She is very very smart, and creative, although she does have problems with anger.

Special Features: Autobot logo on chest (Cockpit/hood)

Weapons: Katana and throwing stars (She’s a fucking ninja)

Other: Transformsona (Besides the twins)

Name: Replicator

Gender: Mech

Species: Cybertronian

Faction: Autobot technically (His methods are…. questionable)

Altmode: DNA Extractor (OR CNA)

Appearance: Replicator, through some serious work on his own frame and weird circumstance, looks eerily like Perceptor. Although he has blue instead of red, and lacks the signature microscope features, the resemblance is uncanny.

Personality: Replicator will do anything in the sake of his research, although he does have a conscious and morals, so he hasn’t done anything too horrendous. Yet. He tends to be a total jackass to everyone, whines constantly, and is a complete coward. So yeah. Annoying.

Special Features: He can extract and replicate CNA, Autobot symbol on shoulders

Weapons: None (he’s a useless sonofabitch)

Other:

Name: Carboncopy

GEnder: Mech

Species: Dinobot

Faction: Autobot (Reluctantly)

Altmode: Allosaurus (NOT A T REX DAMMIT)

Appearance: He looks like Grimlock. That's it, he looks like Grimlock. He has tattoos on his tail, courtesy of Ink. (They’re dinosaur bones)

Personality: An angry, bratty giant child, he complains that ‘I AM NOT GRIMLOCK’ so often it’s probably burned into his processor. He blames Replicator for all his problems.

Special Features: Autobot symbol on chest

Weapons: Jaws, tail, grabby hands of DEATH

Other:

#transformers oc #transformers

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