#her reaction to lottie in modern timeline to me RIGHT NOW feels like. being terrified of hope
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sic transit gloria mundi / burial
#i have SERIOUS thoughts on this but also. a little funny ok tai just finally manages to adjust her view of van#and sort of sway in her own beliefs#and van is like so anyway. atheism 2! gif#anyways.#SOMETHING was out there with us vs i just figured it meant SOMETHING#the juxtaposition of her talking about something supernatural vs her own purpose as a person#and how thats THE SAME FUCKING THING#grasping at something to believe in. a higher power that can save them. save her#losing it because its all just too much. losing it as an adult with a scary diagnosis#her reaction to lottie in modern timeline to me RIGHT NOW feels like. being terrified of hope#i almost died so many times i almost stopped believing i even can die and i put all my faith in you#and now my own body turned malignant and i need to be cynical i need to be REALISTIC#because to hope and to have faith can bring such a crashing disappointment#idk what im saying anymore its 3am anyways . van . vantai also. if you even care#yellowjackets blogging#van#van x taissa
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