#have a good birthday ok fuckface?
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Astor nodded. He and paced the hall and muttered under his breath.
“I see...I never meddled in the realm of technology...but to think that Sheikah Technology could hold such a secret.” He tapped his chin, staring at the astrolabe on the other side of the dungeon bars. “I suppose it makes sense. The advanced accomplishments and feats that such technology is capable of...it’s only naturally that it is powered by unconventional means.”
Siv spun the Sheikah Core on his index finger like it was a ball. “Yeeeep. I’m guessing that’s what allowed the super old dudes to beat the Calamity all those years ago.” He shook his head. “So, yeah. Dick Lord Ganon is gonna use that to turn the Guardians and Divine Beasts against us. And even if the science peeps keep researching into them...well.” He looked up at Astor. “Obviously, they would never figure out this crucial little detail even after a hundred years of science-ing. So this is our little secret, capiche?”
Astor nodded again. If what Asivus was saying was true (And it was) then Hyrule were truly doomed. The Calamity would exploit this secret, and use it to flip the entire war on its head. This is what Ganon would use to turn the Divine Beasts against them.
If any of the researchers found out about this aspect of Ancient Technology, and adapted to it, then Ganon would lose his biggest advantage...and it might be possible to...
The seer quickly shook away the thought. No, even if they knew, the world would be helpless all the same when the Princess fails to awaken their powers. In fact, it would probably be more brutal if Ganon’s forces were reliant completely on the bludgeoning and stabbing that came with monsters. Machines would have avoidable patterns in a post-apocalyptic world, but monsters of malice would be exceptionally harder.
So yes...We keep this info from everyone. Especially Robbie and Purah and...
“How sure are you that no one else could figure this out?” Astor asked.
“Decently sure. I mean, it’d be pretty hard to guess such a crazy thing.” Asivus shrugged.
“Are you positive? Because I know my—” He stopped in his tracks, suddenly stumbling on his words. “I—in reference to random researchers—other non-specified—she’s not—Look. There are very talented and intelligent researchers across the kingdom, surely someone—”
“Did you say it yourself? Everyone’s way to arrogant around here!” Siv threw his hands in the air, exasperated. “No one’s gonna look for faults in their perfect little war machines! They shoot lasers, and don’t talk back. It’s a general’s wet dream. Even if someone figured out this secret, no one here would listen to them.” He waved his hand in a circle and gestured towards his half brother. “Case in point: You.”
Astor folded his arms and sighed. “Alright, fine. So that’s how the Calamity will turn the Guardians and Beasts against us. But what’s the actual execution of it all? The plan? What’s your play in this? How did the Guardians in the yard get corrupted?”
Siv was silent; thinking. He seemed to be endlessly swimming through thoughts and words and memories. The man fiddled with the discs surrounding the astrolabe, eyes drooping in misery. Interesting.
“I was supposed to make them. That’s what he wanted,” Asivus finally said. “Beast of water, lightning, air, and fire. Or, demons? Blights or something. Creatures that were to take on the Divine Beasts.They’re built slightly different than Guardians, so he needed a little something special to deal with ‘em.” He blew hair off his forehead with a huff. “It all sorta just came into my head in the minutes before I fucked up those Guardians, so the details come and go, but that’s the gist. I make the Blights, Ganon does his thing, then I wait at the Sanctum to achieve true happiness or whatever he was bullshitting.”
“But you failed.” Astor interjected. “You failed to make the blights, and thus today’s calamity failed. At least, in this timeline.” Siv opened his mouth to object, but he continued to think outloud. “The Guardians were a fluke, then. You were not capable of creating Blights, but wielded enough malice to corrupt a Guardian. Although that brings into question how you control malice to begin with...and why you were chosen specifically for the task...”
Asivus was silent again, spinning the astrolabe on the floor. Astor observed him for a moment.
“Is he speaking to you? At the moment?” The seer asked. “Every time you fall silent is when you start looking down at that device. That thing I can correctly assume is the instigator of all this, given that you look at it every time I ask about the recent Guardians you ruined.”
Asivus narrowed his eyes at him, annoyed at being so readable.
“Ganon isn’t in your head, as you said you were overcome with this information in the minutes you truly held that astrolabe and walked by the Guardians.” He thought back. “Earlier before the incident you said you had a dream, and then you found the astrolabe? You leave it on your desk as a paper weight, before developing the decent moral to drop off a potential lost item to the Sheikah. But then you were holding the astrolabe in proximity to the Guardians, and subsequently are suddenly given the revelation to the Calamity’s plan...”
He locked eyes with him. “Combine that with the truth about all Sheikah Technology itself...and the fact that your eyes only change when that core is in your possession...”
Astor walked closer and gripped one of the bars, calmly. “That astrolabe is the link between you and the Calamity. It speaking to you through it. It’s lending you the power to control malice. It’s a manifested vessel of Ganon’s ill intent for this world...perhaps made of whatever malice plagues yourself. Perhaps he chose you for the job because you’re brimming with his favourite substance.”
Assivus started at the seer, and blinked once. Astor took that as confirmation, but asked anyways: “Am I wrong?”
Siv bit his tongue for a moment, before sighing in defeat. “You’ve got Ligero’s mannerisms down to the T. The perceptiveness nearly makes me wish I had actually paid attention to his parenting attempts.”
Something twisted inside Astor at that comment, and his voice grew a dangerous edge. “I’m nothing like him.”
“It’s alright, don’t take it personally. I just have a love-hate relationship with smart people.”
“Tsk.” The prophet stared down the corridor in thought. “Don’t we all.”
“But you’re wrong about one thing.” Siv added, and he looked up at Astor with a new seriousness. “I didn’t ‘fail’ to make the blights.”
He raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, I didn’t fail to make the blights, I didn’t want to.” Asivus raised his voice, and rolled the astrolabe to the other side of the cell. “You can’t fail something you never really attempted in the first place.” He winked. “I mean, that’s been my philosophy on life for the last 15 years, heh.”
Astor blinked in surprise. “But...why? The world is doomed, and you were handed a position of life and power on a silver tray. Chosen above anyone else. Why wouldn’t—?”
“I didn’t do it because I’m not like you, pissface!” Siv snapped. “I jump outta my socks to make a selfish decision. I don’t just run away from any inconvenience in my life.”
Astor nearly laughed. “Oh? And what exactly is it that you do, then? You’re really going to preach to me, Mr. Assivus Asunder?”
“YEAH! That name is exactly why I decided this!” He waved his arms in the air, and gestured to himself as he slumped against the wall. “Taking action and fighting for anything, regardless of what, sucks ass. Initiating change? Bad. Acting on what you care about? No likey.” Siv pounded his chest proudly. “The ideal ending for Asivus Ex-Hartell is to just chill out, and wait for the end. Drink in hand!”
He raised his empty flask, but nonetheless pretended to drink.
Astor frowned, but let the distant drip of leaking water echo in the corridor.
He watched Siv for a few more minutes, silently tapping his fingers on his elbow.
“You still care about your brother.”
It was a good think his flask was empty, as otherwise he would have spit out his drink. Siv angrily sputtered. “The fuck does that have to do with anything—?!”
“Why are you just relaxing in there after all this time? You think you deserve this? Don’t want to be a burden for others?” Astor looked him up and down.
“Listen, you little shit. I know at this point it shouldn’t be a surprise that my family is made up of asshole, but—”
“You know when I first saw you around the castle, I did recognize you. The eyes, you see. But of course, I didn’t see the need to trouble you with my story, but I did watch you.” The prophet sneered. “Dear Asivus Hartell, sneaking into town to share a peach cobbler with his niece. Assivus Asunder, teaching his nephew to shield surf, and trying to encourage him down a more righteous path than his own. The Royal Orator Siv, who thanks his little brother for taking care of him by spending four hours making perfect hand drawn rat doodle cards.” Astor leaned down with a smirk. “You’re not the only one who paid attention to the captain’s birthday presents.”
“Alright get to the point, fuckface.” He waved the prophet off. “What? I screw around with my dumb family. What’s it gotta do with anything?”
“It means that for all your talk of laying down and dying and giving up, your action seems to indicate that you don’t actually believe that.” He jabbed a finger at Siv through the bars. “Or at least you don’t fully. Maybe you don’t want to. So don’t go blathering about your sorry life, only to try and insult me in the next minute. This isn’t about your apathy. You’re just scrambling at this low bar Ganon gives you as you drool the rare opportunity to unequivocally be an undeniably good person. You just want to tell yourself you’re a hero.”
Quiet.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
“OK.” Asivus curled his lip. “I didn’t want to join Ganon, because I’m still stupidly trying to not be an asshole. I’m too much of a wuss to commit to the dickhead role I was probably meant to fulfill. I’m pathetically trying to keep control over my image—is THAT what you want to hear, magic man? Congratu-fucking-lations. You turned the tables, you can see how pathetic I am and can feel better about yourself. How do ya feel?” The astrolabe had rolled by Asivus’ lap, and gold speckled in his eyes.
Astor sighed and answered honestly. “...Well. I’m envious, truth be told.” Siv blinked, but let him continue. “I haven’t bothered trying to be a hero my whole life, much less have such a driven (and these days useless) hunger to be ‘good.’” The seer shook his head, staring down the hall again. “I’m envious, but I do think you’re a fool. I’d take the opportunity to wield the future in a heartbeat, no matter the consequences.”
“You don’t know what you’re saying.” Siv chuckled. “This malice stuff is fucked up.”
“Only because you don’t understand it.” Astor replied, offended. “I’ve studies it for years, and it’s often misunderstood. There’s a beauty and usefulness to it, even detached from the Calamity. You’re just not intelligent enough to get it, I understand. ‘Love-hate relationship,’ like you said.” He snorted.
“Are you sick?! This Ancient Core thing made me walk through so many shitty memories and thoughts...I wouldn’t walk through that again to end OR save the world.”
“Again. All due to your plight of ignorance. It’s not your fault.”
Asivus rolled his eyes. “You know what? Why don’t you explain it me then?! If you’re so excited about it? Talk aaall about how I’m not fit to properly wield this and how pathetic I am?”
Siv dangled the astrolabe in the air between his fingers.
“Go on! Explain how great this malice is, and maybe then if you’re so eager I’ll just leave the thing in your care!”
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Baby’s first Kinktober attempt. Day 1-3 for @pabstbeerpussy ( DP / Dirty Talk / hint of Cuckolding / Oral) I can’t believe I typed those words.
John Seed / Deputy Nic / Sharky Boshaw
Blow Your Mind
Sharky had never been one for celebrating birthdays after he hit thirty. Sure, they were fun, he got hammered, there was a tame amount of fire with the candles Hurk put on those cakes, but it just meant he was getting older and creakier and the girls down at the Spread Eagle gave him less of a glance than they usually did.
And then Nic Motherfucking Raylan had crashed into his life, kicked ass, taken names, and managed to bag herself him and Johnny Appleseed in the process.
And then birthdays went from lackluster to pretty damn fun, mostly because they all went the same way after the three of them started up their Thing:
Their personal celebration usually started with him getting slammed up against the door. Not that he minded. Nic manhandling him was the hottest thing he had ever experienced. And then most coherent thought went out the window because John Smirkin’ Fuckface Seed gave that nickname a double meaning considering his mouth was wrapped around Sharky’s dick.
Christ, how had he never figured the bastard was just as talented in bed with men than he was in women. It felt like John was trying to suck his damn soul out of his dick and well, if that’s how he went out it was A-OK with him. He was dimly aware one of them had started to tug off his T-shirt when the other one had gone to shove his jeans down further, and he scrambled to assist them, nearly falling flat on his face as he went. The next moment he had looked up, Nic was already naked and John was shouldering off his shirt, still far into his task at hand- or was it mouth in this case?
John did something particularly mind-blowing with his tongue after a while and Sharky nearly sagged against the door, and Nic practically shoved him against the door to keep him upright- okay, well, maybe he did have a rough handling kink to counter their exhibition-y one- tugged on his earlobe with her teeth, and he was lost again. “Bed, holy shit, bed.”
John released him with an obscene pop, and Sharky moaned at the loss.
Nic was the one to snap him out of that haze. She took his hand, gave him that one little evil smile that got him going something fierce, guided him to the bed and shoved him onto it.
She kissed him soundly then, but it got progressively sloppier which just wasn’t fair because he was already rock hard and if this kept up it was going to be over quickly- and then ran her tongue down his throat, chest- spent a few seconds on each nipple until Sharky bucked against her, desperate to make a point to tell her to keep going down or move back up so he could return the damn favor- and so she did. Went to his stomach, abs- happy trail, and then she had just about swallowed him whole in one go and it took all it had in him not to buck into her so soon.
“What’ll it be, Charlemagne?” John asked from right beside him. “Your day, your call. Should she get you off like this, or do you want her to ride you? Use your words.”
Fuck, he hated his name but John insisting on using it in that voice and in this context gave him a brand new appreciation of it. And then John nipped his neck hard enough he knew he was gonna be marked the next day- Christ, that was another weird thing, getting used to wanting to get marked by John - and he realized that this was dangerously close to being over very quickly. “Fuck. Fuck, Chica, get up here.” God, he was so needy it was pathetic.
“Yes, sir.”
Oh, they were trying to kill him. He took hold of her hips and slid her up his body to reiterate his request, and she grinned and ground down once they got hip to hip. “Come on, girl.”
She bent down to kiss him, reached back and gave him a couple of strokes before lining herself up and sinking down on him. Both moaned at the feeling, and when Nic grabbed his hands and laced her fingers with his before starting to move, he let his head fall back.
“God, Baby, you feel so fucking good.”
“Yeah,” was about all Sharky could manage. Damn her for being able to think in full sentences. He was going to have to change that. And speaking of talking in full sentences- he cracked one eye open to look for John, only to stop short when he felt teeth on his neck again. Possessive bastard. He went to return the favor and John pulled back with a smirk before he could make contact.
He watched John get on the bed behind Nic, and groaned when the other man took hold of her hips and eased her further down his dick on the next downstroke.
Nic gasped and leaned back against John.
Sharky sighed, then: “Hey, Baby Blue, you gonna just sit here all day and do next to no work or participate?”
“Is that a challenge, Boshaw?”
“No, no challenge. I’m still not over the last one,” Nic cut in.
Sharky laughed. Considering the last one had been ‘who can make her come more times in one night’ he could understand that. She must’ve caught him looking back on the memory fondly because she thrusted herself down harder again. Sharky leaned up to kiss her in response.
“Again, your day, your call,” John responded after a moment.
“Let’s make sure the lady’s taken care of.”
The absolute conspiratorial look John gave Sharky nearly did him in all over again.
John kissed Nic soundly over her shoulder, then reached down to play with her clit. She clenched on Sharky and his head hit the pillow again. Yeah. They were definitely trying to kill him. How the fuck he had gotten so lucky in being part of this was beyond him.
John moved Nic’s hair away from her ear, tucking it behind her shoulder. He kissed her shoulder, then whispered something in her ear that had her whimpering and riding Sharky faster. The wet little schlick coming from where they were joined was driving him insane.
John leaned back and out of sight for a moment. When he returned, he had also lost his jeans and underwear and had apparently kicked them across the room. He was stroking himself idly, and there was a certain sheen on his dick.
Bastard had lubed up and not even let them help. He grunted when Nic circled her lips pointedly and gave a hard few thrust and squeezed her hand as a half-hearted apology. She bent to kiss him again and he shifted, bending his knees and circling her hips with his arms in order to pull her flush against him- they’d need the leverage in a minute anyway.
John sidled up behind them again and moved a certain way and Nic exhaled sharply and rocked back into him. Sharky could see John’s arm flexing over Nic’s shoulder, and God, watching him prep her for this never got any less fucking hot.
It was a matter of moments before John shifted again. He reached up and tilted Nic’s head towards him in order to kiss her. He smirked, kissed her again, then asked “are you ready for me?” against her mouth, and her answering whine and roll of her hips was enough of an answer. He leaned back and eased forward again, and Nic let out an absolutely filthy moan this time around as he entered her other hole.
The men stilled for a while, letting her adjust, and the three of them exchanged kisses to pass the time until Nic nodded quickly, bit her lip and started rising and falling on them, trying to goad them into moving.
They had been doing this long enough that Sharky and John got a rhythm going quickly, alternating strokes in and out.
Nic was doing her damnedest trying to keep up, meeting them thrust for thrust, keening every so often when one of them added a particularly hard thrust to keep her on her toes. Before long she had looped her arms around his neck, and when that wasn’t enough she had switched to wrap around him from under his arms, and before long her nails were digging into his shoulder blades and he knew his neck and back were going to be scratched to all Hell- as was John’s, judging by the pink lines by his ribcage that got left behind any time she reached back to make contact with him.
Apparently, John wasn’t the only possessive one who needed to mark their partners.
Not that Sharky was complaining about that, either. Having evidence of nights well spent was a great souvenir- and birthday present in this case.
Before long Sharky started feeling himself getting close to the edge. He pulled Nic closer, determined to make the last few minutes count. Nic dug her nails into his sides in reaction to the new angle. He fucked into her harder, and felt John, never one to be outdone, adjust himself to accommodate the new speed. Nic was first to sound like she was getting close with those damn little appreciative gasps of hers getting higher and louder.
John reached around her again and rubbed at her clit, and it was a matter of seconds after that that she came with a hoarse scream and clenched around both of them, and John followed nearly immediately after.
Sharky, willing to bask a little bit in the fact that he had lasted longer than John, thrusted a few more times before he went over the edge and spilled inside her. He and John eased out of her. Nic groaned contentedly and leaned against him. He looped an arm around her and offered a weak laugh. John let out a mock offended groan before he pulled himself up to their level and promptly dropped next to them, facedown on a pillow. His groan turned appreciative when Nic reached over to play with his hair.
A few minutes of sated silence passed until Sharky sighed. “Best birthday ever.”
“Such finality, Charlemagne…” John countered, rearranging himself in order to prop himself up on his elbow. He set one hand down on Nic’s hip, then gave Sharky a look that was absolutely predatory. “What on Earth makes you think we’re finished with you?”
#yes this is basically a redo of that one from a few months ago#but also its actually Sharky's birthday soooooo
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60 questions for @not-my-brain
1. selfie.......Ugghhhh ok. Imma take one rn
Ok here u go (yes thats a bmth shirt)
2. what would you name your future kids?.....Ooo hmmm well when i was a kid i really liked the names disney, and mesiah. I didn't know at the time that mesiah was another name for god i think lol. I liked it cause of handlers mesiah. I still do. Ooo and maybe Tj too
3. do you miss anyone?......Yeah. My friends on Pinterest from a year ago. My friend lucas. Stan lee. Bob ross. My cousin who died from cancer some years ago. Snape. Sirius. Lupin. Tonks. Dobby. *continues to name every unfortunate death in hp*
4. what are you looking forward to?.......SE-YA next month!! Its the south eastern young adult festival at this college. You can have meet n greets with authors and alot of stuff its the besstttt
5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?......DEFINATELY. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @sammchenry my friend lucas and @septembersbloom. ^^
6. is it hard for you to get over someone?..... What like...romantically? Or like a death? If romantically uhhh idk it took over a couple weeks but im ok now. Ive never had another relationship so idk. If death oof yeah idk maybe. Ig it depends on how much i knew them idk. Like when my nanny (great grandma) died i was sad for days (is that alot?)
7. what was your life like last year?.....Sucky af. Still is. But the highlights of my life last year was getting and making friends on tumblr, going to the tøp concert and going to warped tour, volunteering at the library, going to seya and meeting some of my favorite authors, reading, changing and improving my art, listening to all the bands i listen to now, getting into more fandoms, going to a friends house for the first time
8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?.......Yes lol. Some years ago when i couldn't find smtn id be so annoyed and pissed id start crying. I dont now but still lol
9. who did you last see in person?.......Hm ig family doesn't count....? Wait do u mean a friend? If so uhh my friends rebekah, anika, and Judah at a TAB meeting at the library sometime last month.
10. are you good at hiding your feelings?......I think so? Like i mean I can hide whenever i get my....time of the month from my mom (talking abt stuff like that with her makes me uncomfortable) and i hid a breakup. And other p big stuff too. So imma say yeah
11. are you listening to music right now?........*pops on earbuds after reading this* yee im listening to bitch lasagna by pewdiepie xD (do i have the best spotify playlist or what?)
12. what is something you want right now?.......To hug @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye but SOMEONE has to live so far away
13. how do you feel right now?........Happy that my earbud still works cause they got washed in the wash yesterday....oops. Its not my fault. I told my dad to remind me to take it out of my jacket pocket before they threw it in but noooooo he forgot
14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?.......Uhhhhh fuck idk it was probably from my lil 4 yr old bro sometime last week. Other than him (hes my favorite sibling) i dont let them hug me too much
15. personality description.......Nerdy. Fangirl. "Emo". Tomboy. Hotsause obsessed. Book lover. Music lover. Black. Blue. Harry potter. Introvert. Fall. Sports. Values friendship. Loyal. Uhhhh i cant think of much lol
16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?.......*sigh* yes. Yes yes yes. Theres some things abt me, or my life really, that i havent told anyone on here or my irl friends that i sooooo want to so bad but i haven't cause i feel like they'd feel bad and pity me and i don't want that
17. opinion on insecurities........I dont really understand this one. Everyones insecure abt something. Is this askin like if i think its ok or not? I say its ok. Im insecure about literally everything about me. My face. My personality. My socialness. My art. What i do. What i say. Basically my whole body. The things i feel good abt are my books, music taste, and my friends (ily fuckers)
18. do you miss how things were a year ago?.........Hmm this time around a year ago....idk its sorta the same but all the stuff i mentioned abt my year from last year didn't happen yet so nah tho my life sucks rn its better than this time last year
19. have you ever been to New York?........Nooo but i want too soo baddd i wanna visit @septembersbloom !! Im coming for ya soon gramps *does the eye watching thing* my dads been to nyc before tho cause he does construction and he had a concrete job to do there. It was a 23 hr drive for him
20. what is your favourite song at the moment?........Uhhh idk!!! So hard! Maybe.....the whole thats the spirit album by bmth ;)
21. age and birthday?.....15 yrs of age and September 27th 2003 (whats yours brainy? I'll put it on my calendar)
22. description of crush......Its weird idk im not sure if its a genuine crush or not but uh....They like hp :).Thats all u get
23. fear(s).......Losing my best friend @dirtysocke and my other friends. Death. Failure. Momo chasing after me then killing me slowly keeping my eyes open to look her dead in the eyes while i die
24. height......5'6 call me short and I'll fuck u up with THIS *pulls out trusty potato peeler named now steve* dont test me boi
25. role model......Hhhhhhhh so many! But uh gosh one of them is @superraedizzle (youtuberrrr) and vexx and bob ross and da vinci and aaaaaaa so many
26. idol(s)......First person that immediately comes to mind is @sammchenry cause he's super cool and he's really nice and his art's reallyyy good (if u havent seen it w-w-what are u even doin with your life?) And he has a great sense of humor and *continues to ramble about why samms the best*
27. things i hate.......Dabs. Transphobes. Homophobic ppl. Basically any hate on the lgbtq+ community. Bullies. The ship starker. Umbridge. Snape haters
28. i’ll love you if….....U you'll eat pizza, draw, and rp harry potter with mee
29. favourite film(s)......Fantastic beasts. Every hp film. Twilight. The maze runner 1-2. The hunger games. Spiderman homecoming. Kingsman: secret service. Into the spideyverse tho i havent seen it yet
30. favourite tv show(s)......Inkmasterrrrr. B99. The mick. The middle. Uhhh idk mostly ink master xD
31. 3 random facts........Ive never had shrimp. I had a beta fish for over a year once. Im eating pizza crust rn
32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?.......G i r l s. I have all girl friends irl and one boy. And on tumblr it seems like i just meet girls? Likei agree with @cristal-kyd1280 its like alot more gals then dudes here. But i do have some guy friends on here too. But mostly girls
33. something you want to learn.......TO DRAW ANATOMY DAMMIT
34. most embarrassing moment........Every moment of my lifes an embarrassing moment. Idk of i can pick a "most" embarrassing one. But one time i i sent my crush (now ex bf) a hey fuckface and like some hearts or whatever for an ask game that meant like "i have a crush on u" "youre adorable" etc and said Hewo but i did it all anonymously. But he confronted me askin if i sent it cause im the only person he knows that actually says hewo lol. Then later on i finally admitted i really liked him and well y'all know the story after i think. Unless you're new
35. favourite subject.......A R TTTT OFC
36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?........meet my friends on tumblr. Get into mtsu (college i wanna go to) and study art. And go skydiving
37. favourite actor/actress........favorite actor uhhhhhh probably thomas brodie sangster or tom felton and my favorite actress? Hmmm idk maybe evanna lynch (luna lovegood)
38. favourite comedian(s).......probably kevin hart lol he's p funny
39. favourite sport(s)........basketballllllll and football
40. favourite memory........uhhhhh idk?? One oh my favorite memories was when we went to see tøp in concert
41. relationship status.....single as a pringle
42. favourite book(s)......harry potter and the order of the pheonix. Harry potter and the half blood prince. Simon vs the homo sapiens agenda. Divergent. Maze runner. Twilight. Fangirl. Fallen. Red queen
43. favourite song ever.......TOO HARD DONT MAKE ME CHOOSEEEEEE
44. age you get mistaken for.........16 and 17 sometimes lol
45. how you found out about your idol........i was watching someone on yt and superraedizzle always poped up in my feed and my mom turned on one of her vids cause she always saw her vids too now ive seen most of em i love her. Id heard of vexx but never watched him and i was watching a collab from anthony miller art and shrimpy and i checked out shrimpys channel and was lookin at comments and alot of ppl said his art is like vexxs so i checked out vexx. At first i was like eh ok. Now i cant click fast enough when he posts a vid. And i actually fpund out about bob ross from my grandpa on jan 20 2017 when trump was getting sworn in or whatever. We turned on pbs and my grampa told me to look and bob ross was on and i was IN. I loved it. I even started watching full episodes on YouTube of the joy of painting after that. Wonderful man. My first painting i ever did i think was when i followed one of his tutorials xD (i didnt know it was popular at the time)
46. what my last text message says......."ok your turn"
47. turn ons.....uhh nerds ig idk um book lovers, music lovers, art lovers, potterheads, idk and nice ppl
48. turn offs......jerks. Homophobia. Idk ig whatever i said in things i hate
49. where i want to be right now......uhhhh idk wait didn't i already answer this? Ok this ones different ig so uhh with my friend lucas
50. favourite picture of your idol.....oh shit...favorite? Idk xD i have a fave of vexx but not of rae or bob. But heres pics of them any way
51. starsign......a libraaaaa boiii
52. something i’m talented at......drawing and speed reading. Thats about it lol. Oh and procrastina
53. 5 things that make me happy.......ooooo art, my friends here on tumblr, books, harry potter, and music ^^
54. something thats worrying me at the moment.....if my friend thinks im being annoying
55. tumblr friends......hhhhh so manyyyyyy. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @chinesewaffles2 @kingantlion @queen-baelin @sammchenry @septembersbloom and more
56. favourite food(s)......green beans, pepperoni pizza, and vanilla madelines
57. favourite animal(s).......basically any reptile. Puppies. Cats. Any animal really but my #1 are snakes
58. description of my best friend.....well she's a tiny bean (5 feet) and she has dark hair, she wears glasses, she doesnt take shit, she's in love with Josh dun, she's awesome, funny, nice (YES youre nice jackie) and shes the best friend ive ever had. Oh. And she has a weird obsession with spaghetti
59. why i joined tumblr.......well i heard abt it on Pinterest over a year ago but didnt want it. Then @mrfastbass-deactivated20181231 on DeviantArt said he got tumblr so i made one then followed him and figured id just post art and that's it cause i thought tumblr was boring as hell when i first got it. Now im p much obsessed with it
60. ask me anything you want.......go ahead brainy shoot. Give me smtn good
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saccharine - lee donghyuck
⇢ prompt “This is the only special part so far.”
⇢ pairing haechan x female reader
⇢ word count 2.1k
⇢ genre fluff
⇢ warnings none
⇢ summary One thing on top of another leads to one Hell of an emotional week. Luckily, the birthday boy with the sun under his skin and a passion when it comes to cinnamon buns is there to save the day.—highschool!au
⇢ a/n idrk what this is,,,,it started as one thing and ended as another BUT ITS OK cuz im so happy with this, i uwu, v cute, its kind of dramatic??and depressing??at first?? but low key relatable so UHHHHH enjoy! happy 18th birthday lee donghyuck ❥
The balance on which your patience and sanity sit on is far too close to teetering off the edge; one minuscule blow and off you will tumble, falling down into a hole of desperation and depression that only breakdowns and napping and pints of ice-cream can fix.
It’s simply an amalgamation of factors that will lead to your potential breakdown, a multitude of unlucky combinations that, in accordance with the universe, lunge upon you all at once. And while life could be much, much worse, it’s the overwhelming panic and desolation that makes it so unbearable.
The first, the least stressful but nonetheless one that has you sitting in bed at night on the brink of tears, is the reality that after a whole four years, one thousand four hundred and sixty days, high school would be over. All the set routines, all the unforgettable memories—all of it, cut off with a signed piece of paper and a handshake.
The second: your ex-boyfriend has someone new. While the breakup was months ago, a lengthy amount of time that allowed for the hopelessness and betrayal to finally diminish until you were back on your feet again, enjoying the life of not being tied down and being able to hook up with anyone you damned please, it hurts. It’s an odd sting, a wrenching in your heart that he has found someone else and you haven’t, a dull ache no matter how hard you convince yourself that you don’t care.
The third element to your disastrous undoing, one that every student faces and dreads: exams. You’re smart, undeniably smart, and that’s what makes exams all the more stressful. The honest-to-goodness want and need to do well, combined with the consequences of procrastination make for a week full of rushed studying and ‘I’ll be fine’s, followed by a two hundred question test slapped in your face at seven in the morning that only partially makes sense.
And the icing on the cake: you are premenstrual. It’s the final blow that makes your closing week of school so atrocious, one that heightens the sadness of this is it for school, the grief of a long ago broken heart, and the monstrous stress of finals. A voice in the back of your head always bitching, bubbling over in your mind that absolutely everything and everyone has to get on your nerves, topped with the undeniable horniness constantly aching in your brain and abdomen along with the wavering self-doubt, euphoria, despair, and irritability.
And even after the last day of school, the final exam, the cheering as you exit the building you’ve been a prisoner in for the past four years, the realization that it’s over, you still are in the grip of a silent panic, an unstoppable snowball fight in the pit of your stomach.
It’s an awkward time of the day once you arrive home from school for the last time, too late to make last minute plans but too early to crash no matter how much your heart calls you to.
Instead, you make a hasty decision to head back out even after you have changed into sweats, opting for a happy middle ground rather than choosing one and ending up disappointed. Off to the bakery you go, driving into the quieter part of town in impassive quietness and staring up at the baby blue sky.
It’s comforting in a strange sort of way, the soporific shade bringing a sense of luxury and serenity like warm milk and honey. However, all good things must come to an end, you realize after you park, abruptly exiting the car and slamming the door closed before making your way up onto the sidewalk.
Like a ghost in a world full of paper dolls you enter the bakery huddled between the bank and antique shop, a place where air is more delicious than any flavor and mouth-watering displays cause more regret than any drunken party ever could.
The cinnamon buns just so happen to be like your Achilles tendon; at the sight of one you’d stop dead in your tracks, the damned things are your nemesis and elixir all in one and there’s simply no denying a decadent treat like this on such a forlorn day.
Upon entering the bakery, you let out a mesmerized sigh at the beckoning aroma of fresh baked cookies and cakes and pastries and you hardly feel a hint of embarrassment when your stomach growls instantaneously. The impending hollow sadness quickly vanishes and is replaced with the sudden sense of tranquility. Finally, you think, stepping up to stand behind a young girl finishing her order, things can only get better from here.
However, just as you’re drilling optimistic thoughts into the confines of your brain, a customer with a dash too much pep in his step bursts through the door from behind you and, astoundingly, cuts in front of your spot with not even an ‘Excuse me.’
You’re flabbergasted, to say the least, sparks in your brain, desperately trying to connect the dots and instead just causing a short circuit. And suddenly you are underwater—everything is slow and warbled and you’re left unable to speak as the culprit has the audacity to move up in line and place his order as if nothing had ever happened.
And with a force like water bursting forth from a dam, brick by brick the walls come tumbling down, tears spilling down your face, struggling to breathe, you turn with a trembling chin to look toward the window, clawing for some sort of comfort in the light outdoors. However, the bustling of customers around you cannot mask the hushed sobs that shake your body, and no matter how furiously you wipe the tears from your cheeks or suck in air to calm your lungs, nothing can hide the fact that you are standing in the middle of a bakery weeping.
“Shit, that was not supposed to happen.”
The gentlest of hands grasping your own pauses your public breakdown, and for a split second, you jerk away from the tender touch until, no matter how hard it is to do so, you glance up.
“Donghyuck,” you hiccup upon recognition, “what’re you doing here?”
“What am I doing here? I should be asking you that,” Donghyuck chortles, “I went to buy you a cinnamon bun and then you started sobbing.”
Oh.
“You didn’t—you never,” you groan, “why didn’t you say hi first instead of cutting in front of me like an idiot?” You grumble, retracting your hands to messily rub away the remaining wet streaks down your cheeks, grossly heaving in oxygen and blinking out a few more tears. “I thought it would be cute and spontaneous, and then you turned to shit,” the tanned boy retorts, turning momentarily to grab the bag coasted across the counter to him before, suddenly, intertwining his fingers with yours and dragging you to a free table.
“So, why’d you go all batshit back there?” Donghyuck asks, rosy heart-shaped lips tugging up into a soft smirk even as he sits you down in the booth and takes a seat across from you. It’s dangerous, you realize; the mocking lilt to his voice paired with kindness that is more than out of place, and, of course, his overall handsomeness. From golden skin, warmer than any sunset you’ve seen, disheveled auburn hair dipping into black eyes with irises shimmering with all the stars in the night sky, cherry red lips that allow one-too-many smartassed words slip by. Lee Donghyuck is truly an enigma.
"Why’d you buy me a cinnamon bun?” You retort finally, reaching for the bag and tearing it open, eager for the delight inside. Donghyuck rolls his eyes, “Answer my question first.”
Stubborn. “I’ve had a rough week, and that was just the cherry on top,” you tell him truthfully, “also, how’d you know I was here?”
“One question at a time, tiger.” Snotty. “I didn’t follow you, you’re not that special, although I did see you walk in here with the most miserable look I may have ever seen and thought, ‘Hey, now’s a good time to rekindle what I had with the girl I’ve been crushing on since she dropped me for some fuckface baseball player sophomore year.’“
You blink once and then again, pausing your attack on the first bite of dessert to look up at Donghyuck. Candid. Processing his words, you stare at him blankly, his lips pouted into a smirk once more, “I did not drop you.”
“Babe, you definitely did.” A flirt.
“You’re the one that told all your friends I was a bitch!”
“God, ___, it was a joke. Ever heard of one of those?” Rude. “Can you just shut up and let me eat my cinnamon bun?” You grumble, peeling off a chunk, cinnamon glaze sliding under your nail.
“Technically it’s mine, but fine,” he chuckles, grinning devilishly as you pop the bit into your mouth, a hypnotized sigh escapes your lips and suddenly the golden boy isn’t so wicked. “Fine, I was a baby back then, I’ll admit it. However, if you’re trying to get me to fall for you again, this whole mocking me when I’m emotionally unstable isn’t gonna do it for you.”
Donghyuck processes your words, squinting as you go on with your feast, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning into the wooden table, “Why was this a rough week?”
“Well, let’s see,” you sigh, counting your fingers, “high school is over and university is going to be stressful, fuckface baseball player has a new girlfriend, exams made me lose brain cells, and my period is coming soon so I want to die.”
“That doesn’t sound fun,” he comments, tearing a piece of the cinnamon bun off and you glare at him. “It’s not.”
“At least you have a cinnamon bun now,” beams Donghyuck, kicking your shins under the table and you groan. Childish. Licking your fingers clean you check your phone, glancing at the time and catching the date by chance. Then, “Isn’t today your birthday?”
“You remember?” He asks and your heart lurches at the innocent cloud that passes his features. You nod slowly, returning his smile, “Happy birthday, then.” Donghyuck‘s cheeks flush the faintest shade of coral and at the heat rising upon your own you turn away, clearing your throat and munching on another piece. Angelic.
“Anyway,” you cough, “how’s your birthday been so far? Any plans?”
Donghyuck shrugs, “None yet, just dinner with my family and I’ll probably hang with the boys tomorrow. This is the only special part so far.”
“Oh,” you quip, frantically searching for a spot to look at and settling on a grey pigeon outside, pecking viciously at whatever is on the pavement, “that’s good.” Glancing back to the cinnamon bun, mouth watering at the gooey center, you force the temptation back, “You can have that.”
His eyes light up. “Really?” You nod, laughing, watching joyfully as he instantly snatches the last bit up and shoves it into his mouth. “Fuck, man, that was good, thank you,” Donghyuck rambles, wiping the frosting from his fingers and reaching for your hands.
“So,” he sighs, nestling his hands into your own and squeezing them, “in all seriousness, since we’re going to the same school and all, could we maybe... try the whole dating thing again?” Determined.
Donghyuck grimaces, a fault you never thought you would ever see cross his face, for doubt simply did not exist in his life and here it is, spread out in front of you and your response is the next move in this game of chess. “Hyuck,” you chuckle softly, gliding your thumb across his palm, “I’d be dumber than dumb if I let you get away. Of course I want to try it again.”
“Really?” He squeals, you nod and he clutches you fingers once more. “That’s a relief, I was starting to worry I royally fucked up.” Entertaining.
You laugh again, eyeing him as he slides from the booth and throws out the bag before returning before you. “You certainly did not fuck up, you just made me happy for like, the first time in a week.” You follow him out, walking by his side to your car and squinting past the blinding streaks from the sunset, mesmerized by the melanin of his skin that suddenly seems to glow in the sunlight, reaching for his arm and curling your hand around his bicep. Breathtaking.
“Well, this was good,” Donghyuck gleams, a lighthouse shining out across the sea, pausing in front of the car, “I’ll call you soon?” A gentleman. “Okay,” you sigh blissfully, “I’ll be waiting by the phone.”
He kisses you too quickly, a rushed brush of his lips and then it’s gone with the wind; you have to tug him back, pulling him flush against your form, whispering a “Happy birthday,” because God, your week just got so much better and he’s just too sweet.
#lee donghyuck#donghyuck#haechan#nct#nct u#nct 127#nct dream#haechan scenarios#donghyuck scenarios#nct fanfic#nct scenarios#nct reactions#nct fluff#nct dream fluff#nct 127 fluff#haechan fluff#haechan nct#donghyuck nct#happy birthday haechan#happy birthday full sun
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Happy Easter! Pharmacy Follies
-Sometimes, I wonder about how they come up with the names of some of the shit we have stashed in the pharmacy and realized how lewd they can sound...
Last night, my man put his Harvoni in my Taytulla and we proceeded to Fenofibrate the night away and all was well until he decided to Kayexalate in my eye.
-Aye, because I've been sick and not in the mood for anyone's shit, my mind has mentally blocked out the stupidity to prevent me from snapping and killing the idiots. However, to humor all ya'll, FB was kind enough to remind me of these gems from 9 years ago. Enjoy!!!
1. Huh?
So I'm standing at the out-window, minding my own business, when some fruitcake comes up to me, shows me a bottle of Diabetic Tussin and asks...
Fruitcake: "Where can I find this but something different?"
Me: "Huh?"
Fruitcake: "I want to get this but something different."
Me: "So let me get this straight, you want to know where the Diabetic Tussin is but you want to get something different?"
Fruitcake: "Yes."
Me: "Against the wall past the pharmacy window."
I wasn't going to bother any further with that idiotic nonsense.
2. Get away from me
Dipshit comes to the counter and asks....
Dipshit: "Where can I find diaper rash cream?"
Me: "Aisle 3."
Dipshit: "Where's aisle 3?"
Me: "It's located between aisle 1 and 2."
Fuckin really.
3. Shoot me
Moron comes through the drive-thru to drop off prescriptions. Her children never had prescriptions filled so I make the mistake of asking....
Me: "Do you have insurance?"
Moron: "Yes, Public Aid."
And that's when the Mexican stare down begins. This would be a normal persons cue to take the card out and hand it to me but we're dealing with complete idiots here. I couldn't take the suspense any longer so I ask....
Me: "Do you want me to bill Public Aid or do you want to pay out of pocket?"
Moron: "Bill Public Aid."
Me: "Ok, do you have the card?"
Moron: "Yes."
And the Mexican stare down begins again. Again, this would be a normal persons cue to whip out the card but again, we're dealing with complete shitwits here. The suspense was killing me so I asked....
Me: "Ok, in order to bill Public Aid, I need to see the card."
That's when the lightbulb went off in her head and she said...
Moron: "You need the card?"
Me: "That's what I said."
Moron: "I'm not sure if I have it."
Me: "I cannot bill Public Aid unless you have the current card."
Moron: "Oh, I understand. I didn't know I was supposed to have it."
Me: "Yes, one of the requirements of Medicaid is that you show a current card whenever you seek medical assistance. Not only that, I can't bill Medicaid if I don't have the information in the system."
Moron: "So I need to show you the card in order for them to pay for the medicine?"
I'll bet you all an ovary and Ray's left nut that she graduated at the top of her class.
4. Compruébese antes de usted la ruina usted mismo!(Check yourself before you wreck yourself, for the Spanish challenged)
There's one thing I loathe and that's the E-RX system. The E-RX system allows doctors to send prescriptions over the computer. The main reason I loathe it is because doctors have a tendency of telling their patients...
Moronic Doctor: "I just sent your prescription to the pharmacy. It will be ready by the time you get there."
Uh, NO!! It does not work that way. Your doctor has no more control over my wait times than I do his appointment book. If I can't send one of my patients over to the doctors office to be pushed ahead of everyone else and to be seen right away then what makes them think that the prescriptions they send over have precedence over the prescriptions that were ahead of theirs? So we just open the pharmacy and I notice that there's 2 E-RX's waiting to be entered in. What a great way to begin my day. I enter them in and 15 minutes later, some dude comes to the counter and asks...
Idiot: "Speak Polish?"
Me: "No."
He shows me his ID and he's the dude from the E-RX's. I try to explain to him....
Me: "We have your prescriptions but they aren't ready. It will be one hour."
Idiot: "No, no. My doctor said ready."
Me: "No, they're not. We just got them. It will be one hour."
Idiot: "One hour?"
Me: "Yes."
Idiot: "Not good!"
Me: "I didn't say it was but it's one hour."
It's quite apparent that he really didn't understand me. Fuck 'em. You know, I can accept that some folks don't understand nor speak English. English is a hard language to learn. However, if you cannot understand nor speak English then it would be wise to bring someone who CAN understand and speak English. This is especially important when dealing with medicine because if I ask you if you're allergic to the medication your doctor prescribed and you say "no" because that's the only English word you know, don't get mad at us when you into anaphylactic shock. And don't come back with some idiot English speaking kinfolk who acts all incensed because none of us speak your language and couldn't help you out. These fuckers have no right to be mad when they couldn't be bothered to get off their ass to help you in the first place.
5. Sucks to be you
Fucktard calls up and says...
Fucktard: "I need a refill on my birth control."
She gives me the refill number and I tell her....
Me: "Your prescription is expired. We'll have to contact your doctor."
And here's where the fun begins...
Fucktard: "What do you mean it's expired? I have 2 refills!"
Me: "This prescription, and the refills, are only good for one year from the original date."
Fucktard: "The last time I got it filled, they told me I have 2 refills."
Me: "You did have 2 refills but they're expired."
Fucktard: "I don't think you understand. It's the weekend and my doctors office is closed. If I do not take my pills, my menstrual cycle will be all messed up."
Me: "Ok? That doesn't change the fact that your prescription is expired and that we have to contact the doctor for more refills."
Fucktard: "Then why did they tell me I have 2 refills? They should've never told me that! Why did they lie to me?!"
Me: "You weren't lied to. You asked if you had refills and you were correctly told that you have 2 refills. Those refills expired on 3/15. You could've gotten those 2 refills prior to that date. Because it's past 3/15, your prescription is expired."
Fucktard: "Why didn't anyone tell me that?!"
Me: "We do tell you that via your prescription label. All prescription labels tell you the expiration date of your refills."
You know, I've never understood the attitude of "everyone is responsible for my health EXCEPT for me". If you aren't going to take care of your health properly and put that responsibility into someone elses hands then you have NO right to bitch when things aren't done to your satisfaction. Grow the fuck up!
6. Sweet Jesus
So M my Little Hottie Beefcake is having trouble getting an insurance to go through. I take over and at one point, I need to find out who the primary card holder is....
Me: "Who's the card holder?"
Shitwit: "Tom."
Me: "Ok, what's his birthday?"
Shitwit: "I don't know."
Me: "How is Tom related to Jim?"
Shitwit: "That's his father."
Me: "You don't know your sons fathers birthday?"
Shitwit: "No."
Me: "I cannot bill the insurance unless I have that information."
Shitwit: "Ugh! Hold on!"
And she whips out her cell phone, dials a number and annoyingly asks her baby daddy for his birthday. I guess in this day and age, it's totally insane to know the birthday of the man who penised you enough to shoot his seed inside of you that resulted in a child springing forth from your loins. Then again, I'm the kind of person who likes to find out that information prior to being face down ass up. I guess I'm old fashioned like that.
7. Quit playin
Assmunch comes to the counter and informs us that he wants to transfer prescriptions from Walmart to us. He's asked if he's got the prescription bottles and he doesn't. He says...
Assmunch: "I want everything filled. It should be in the computer."
M: "You had them filled here?"
Assmunch: "No, Walmart."
M: "We're not Walmart."
Assmunch: "I know but I want to fill them here."
M: "Ok, I need the name of the medications and Walmarts phone number."
Assmunch: "Can't you just look in the computer for that?"
M: "Uh, no."
Assmunch: "Why not? I get them there all the time."
M: "Because we're not Walmart."
Assmunch: "But it should be in the computer."
M: "We're not connected to Walmarts computer so I can't look in their system to find out what you get."
Assmunch: "But I want to get them filled here."
M: "Ok, if you give me the name of the medications and Walmarts phone number, we can call and transfer them."
Assmunch: "I don't know the names. That's why I told you to look in the computer. It's all in there."
At that point, I was waiting for M to climb onto the counter, drop kick Assmunch in the neck and put him into a choke hold until he either tapped out or died from suffocation. I, personally, would prefer the latter.
8. God help us
The phone rings and I answer it....
Me: "Pharmacy, can I help you?"
Idiot: "I just took a pregnancy test. What does negative mean?"
Me: "Negative means you're not pregnant."
Idiot: "Oh, ok. Thanks!"
Me: "No, thank you!"
And I thanked her because the last thing the world needs is more stupid people.
9. Lord have mercy
Fuckface comes to the counter to pick up a prescription. Her insurance rejected it because it says it's too soon to be filled because it's been sent out via mail order. Here's where the fun begins. She flips out and says...
Fuckface: "That's wrong! I don't get mail order!"
R the Pharmacist: "I can only go by what the insurance says. They said that this was sent out a few days ago."
Fuckface: "Well I haven't received it yet and he really needs this medication!"
Me: "I thought she doesn't get mail order?"
Fuckface: "I spoke to the insurance and they said it would be taken care of and that it would be ready."
R: "That's not true. I'm trying to submit a claim to them and they're not paying for it."
Fuckface: "Yes, they are."
R: "Uh, no they're not. The only thing I can do is call the insurance to find out what's going on."
Fuckface: "There's no need to call the insurance! I already spoke to them and they said it's ready!"
R: "They're wrong."
Fuckface: "Do your job, Guy, or I'll come back there and do it for you."
Me: "Considering how busy we are, can we take her up on her offer? We could use the help especially from this intelligent being. She may be able to teach us peons a thing or two."
And you can bet your sweet asses that I was laughing my ass off at this. She reminded me of the old Walter Lantz cartoon of the man being told he needs to watch his nerves or he'll explode
10. I hate people
Jagnut is standing at the counter with a prescription in hand. I make the mistake of asking...
Me: "What's your phone number?"
Jagnut: "I don't know. It's in the computer."
I didn't know what knowing your phone number required high intellect.
11. Along the same lines
Halfwit comes to the counter and asks....
Halfwit: "Can I take this medication with everything I'm on?"
Me: "What medication are you on?"
Halfwit: "I don't know. It's in the system."
Great answer. After all, when you're in a horrific car accident, they're rolling your stupid ass into the ER and they ask you...
ER surgeon: "We need to know what medication you're on so there won't be any interactions."
It's not going to help them when you say....
Halfwit: "I don't know. It's in the system."
And you all wonder why I hate people.
12. Stop that!
So I'm standing in the drive-thru, entering in prescriptions or taking care of problems when it never fails. Some asshole will roll up and will ring the God damn bell while I'm standing there. That annoys the ass off of me because these idiots actually think I'm going to stop what I'm doing just to help them. It got so bad that it pissed T off and she gets on the speaker and says...
T: "She's standing right there! She'll be right with you! You can stop ringing the bell now!"
And they try to feign innocence by claiming they didn't see me there. I guess that can happen when you have your head wedged firmly up your ass.
Now onto the lighter side of things. We have a new pharmacist, H. We just love her to pieces. Considering that she's got a foul mouth like the rest of us, she fit right in. So we're standing around when a script came in for Suprax. For some unknown reason, I thought it was on a manufacturer back order. T pulls it off the shelf and says...
T: "We got some right here!"
Me: "Well spank my ass and call me Charles!"
And that's when H comes over, slaps me on the ass and calls me Charlie. Needless to say, I damn near died laughing. I also thanked God that I didn't exclaim "Fuck me up the ass with concrete dildo!" like I normally do.
For some ungodly reason, the higher ups like to think part of our job entails hawking shit like we're used car salesmen and one of those things are flavors. I, personally, think that flavoring medication makes it taste worst, I don't bring it up unless a customer request it and the only time I do suggest it is for a medication called Cleocin granules. The reason for that is and to quote H...
H: "Cleocin smells like farts and taste like shit!"
See? Didn't I tell you she fits right in with the rest of us vile savages?!
-Speaking of H, here's another blast from the past from 4 years ago. I've died AGAIN!! ROFLMAO!!!!!!!
-This video has been making the rounds and needless to say, it's maniacally hilarious. I show it to J. She dies laughing. However, nothing could prepare us for H the Pharmacist's reaction. I show it to her and the look on her face was priceless. That pales in comparison to the question she asked, which J and I were totally not prepared for: "Is that a Black one? It's kind of big!"
All I'm going to say is that there really is a God because He saved J and I from dying from laughter. In fact, I'm laughing so hard that I'm crying as I type this. This shall forever live in infamy! Enjoy! And if you haven't seen this video, just remember H's question while viewing it and it will make it even more funnier!!
youtube
-Who the fuck pulled this heinous crime?!!!!!!
-I see a car about to pull up in the drive-thru so I head over to answer it. Just as Asshole rings then bell, she feels that's the perfect time to get on her phone and light up a cigarette....
Me: "Can I help you?"
Asshole is running her cock holster on her phone.
Me: "Can I help you?"
Asshole take a drag from her smoke.
Me: "Why are you in my drive-thru?"
Asshole seemed really upset that I rudely interrupted her phone call: "I'm here to pick up a prescription."
Me: "What's the name?"
Asshole: "Shit Wit."
Me: "Do you have insurance?"
And that's when her passenger answers: "I have Public Aid."
Me: "Do you have the card?"
Asshole: "It should be in the system."
Me: "It's not. I'll need to see the card."
Shit Wit: "I don't have a card. All I have is this."
And she hands me a piece of paper with an ID number on there.
Me: "This number isn't going through. Medicaid says you're enrolled under a managed care program. I tried looking up coverage but nothing comes up. You're going to have to call your insurance and get the billing information."
Asshole: "Public Aid says that's all you need to bill them."
Me: "You were misinformed. So you'll need to call them and get the billing information."
Asshole: "Can't you call them?"
Me: "No."
Asshole: "Why not?"
Me: "Because it's not my responsibility to get your insurance information. It's almost April. If you know you have new insurance but they haven't sent you a card, you should've taken care of that in January. You shouldn't be going 4 months into the year without a new card or at least without getting the correct billing information."
Asshole: "So are you saying she can't get her medication?"
Me: "I'll be more than happy to sell you the medication at $115."
Asshole: "But she has insurance! I don't see why you won't call to get the information!"
Me: "I don't see why you don't call being that you have a phone in your hand."
Asshole: "Just transfer it to a different pharmacy."
Me: "If you want it transferred, go to the pharmacy of your choice and have them call us. You have a good day."
And that's when I had to walk away. Seriously, ya'll. It's almost fucking April. If you know you have new insurance and have not received a new card, what in the fuck are you waiting for?!! This just defies logic.
-So once again our hours got cut, for whatever fucking reason. The crazy part was I went to the fast food joint across the way and had a motherfucking epiphany. While I was waiting for them to hook me up with lips and assholes, I noticed they had at least 6 people working in that joint. 4 people cooking the food and 2 people taking orders. Mind you, this wasn't during a rush hour. It was around 3pm. It dawned on me that this food joint had more people working in it than there were in my pharmacy. At that time, it was 3 techs and 2 pharmacists and the only reason there were 3 techs and 2 pharmacists was because it was the overlap. Normally, it's just 2-3 techs and 1 pharmacist.
We're a busy pharmacy. So why in the fuck am I killing myself, running around like a nut, getting upset when I can't finish my job or do my job correctly when the company I work for refuses to properly staff the pharmacy? There is something SERIOUSLY WRONG when a fast food joint has more people working to make sure people get their lips and assholes in a timely manner than a pharmacy where we literally have peoples lives in our hands where a mistake can harm or even kill someone. I don't get it. Perhaps I should get into stripping. I may not be able to drop it's hot but I can lay it down like it's lukewarm. At this point, grinding on cock seems way better than running around like a nut, getting stress headaches and being told we're not working hard enough.
-Easter Musing:
When a patient gets mad at you because you can't tell them what their copay will be just by looking at their prescription but has to whip out their cell phone and look in their contacts because they don't know their own fucking phone number.
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Private Security-Chapter 8
Linnea’s POV
I was frustrated.
Nothing felt right since coming home.
Matthias had assigned Ben as my personal security. Ugh…Ben.
When I woke up in the hospital with him at my side, his first words were, ‘About fucking time’, just before giving me a big, toothy smile. Ben was a short, stocky, bull of a guy. He was a bit brash, but was really funny and quite charming. He busted my balls, not unlike a big brother would; and we became fast friends. He loved comic books, Irish whiskey, and using the word ‘fuck’ as often as possible. He made me laugh; and despite the fact that he was a giant goofball, I felt comfortable with him.
Ben was a good man. But he wasn’t the man I wanted.
He wasn’t Matthias.
It drove me crazy knowing that, due to the heavy security presence, not to mention the cameras in the house and on the property, Matthias could probably see me all the time…but I couldn’t see him. I often wondered, ‘Is he watching me right now?’, ‘Does he miss me?’, ‘Does he care that I miss him?’
I went about my business the best I could, considering that it felt like my heart was breaking. I read a lot; and Ben and I sat around and watched movies-usually involving lots of explosions and women in tight clothing. If Ben had a movie preference, I would describe it as ���the more shit that gets blown up, the better it is’. I wondered if he and Matthias ever talked about movies. Would probably be a very interesting conversation…
The only times I left the house were for my two follow-up appointments at the hospital. The first was a couple days after I had gotten home. They did some scans just to make sure that there still wasn’t any swelling or bleeding in my brain. Everything was clear. The second appointment was about 5 days later. I finally got those damn stitches removed. As they healed, they had gotten more and more irritating. Ben was constantly giving me shit about my complaining, but I think he secretly felt bad for me…even though he never let me feel bad for myself.
When Ben and I returned from my second appointment, he made sure to get me settled inside, and then said he had to run out for a moment. I didn’t ask where. Instead, I went up to my bedroom to change into some lounge pants and an old tank top, completely set on the idea of a nap. As I chanced a look out the bedroom window, I saw Ben outside…talking to Matthias. Ben was laughing and making lots of big gestures while Matthias just stood stoically with his arms crossed over his chest. At one point, Ben gestured towards Matthias’ side and seemed to ask a question. Matthias gingerly rubbed an area just below his armpit and nodded in response. As comforting as it was to see him, I was also concerned. He looked…sad. I tried to not dwell on it for too long. That wasn’t good for me. I needed to move on; and peering at him like a stalker from my window was not going to help me do that. Instead of a nap, I made my way downstairs, grabbed the remote, and opened up Netflix. A little distraction was just what I needed.
Ben came back in and plopped down on the couch next to me.
“Ok, fuckface, what are we watching this afternoon? If you make me watch another chick flick, I’m going to put you in a sleeper hold.”
“Shut it, Benjamin. You’ll watch what I pick and you’ll like it.”
Then, as casually as I could, I asked the question.
“So, what was all that about outside?”
“Oh, that? Yeah, fucker is getting his stiches out in a couple days. Was just asking how things were healing up. Stupid asshole just had to go and get himself fucking stabbed.”
My heart dropped to my stomach.
“What! Stabbed? When the hell did that happen?”
Ben looked at me as if I had grown three heads.
“When? It happened when you guys were attacked last week. You seriously didn’t know?”
No. I didn’t know. And it made me fucking furious that he’d gotten seriously hurt and hadn’t told me. I remembered the blood running down his arm, but in my state of shock after the incident, I never knew what had happened. Stabbed! How could he keep that from me? He may not have shared the feelings for me that I had for him, but he could have at least told me how badly he had been hurt. Maybe he didn’t tell me because he blamed me for it? That thought made me unbearably sad. In that moment, I wanted nothing more than to talk to him, to hug him, to thank him for saving me…to know that he was alright. But, somehow, I knew that wasn’t what he wanted.
As I felt my heart breaking all over again, Ben chose ‘The Expendables’ from the online menu. I think he probably knew that something was up when I didn’t protest his decision, but I didn’t have the heart or the energy to fight with him in that moment. I wanted one thing. Only one. I wanted, no…needed, to talk to Matthias.
Little did I know, I’d get my chance a few days later.
**********
I couldn’t sleep and had risen early to head down into the basement for an early morning run. Dad had several pieces of workout equipment; and while I suspected that they were used very sparsely in my absence, I was happy to have them there. Over the years, I’d managed to talk him into a treadmill, some free weights, and a punching bag.
Since that day at the park, I’d been having trouble at night. The nightmares weren’t too bad, but I couldn’t stay asleep for more than a few hours at a time. I’d taken to getting up early and doing 3 or 4 miles on the treadmill before making my morning coffee. This particular morning, my headphones were already blaring when I made my way down the steps. If I’d waited another minute to crank my workout mix, I probably would have heard the dull thud of the heavy bag being battered on the other side of the door.
Instead, I just walked right in, not at all prepared for what I saw.
Matthias was here.
He was here and he was working out.
He was here and he was working out and he was shirtless.
His smooth, tan, naked expanse of back was sweaty from exertion and the muscles in his arms tensed and released with each strike as he gracefully circled the bag swinging from the ceiling. His feet moved the entire time and he kept his hands in a ready position, even when he wasn’t actively punching. I figured that this defensive stance had been ingrained deeply through the years of extensive training. There was a square of gauze secured by tape on his right side, just below his armpit and slightly towards the back-evidence of the wound that had been inflicted protecting me. In a way, it almost felt as if he now had a piece of me on his body forever. Instead of feeling guilty about it, for the first time…I felt almost glad. Not glad that he had been hurt, but glad that I had marked him like he had marked me. No matter what, I’d always be with him…even if it was only on his body instead of in his heart. He was so beautiful.
He didn’t notice me right away.
When he finally did, he dropped his hands to his sides and just stopped, as if someone had hit an invisible ‘pause’ button. Neither of us said a word; we just stared, drinking each other in.
He was the first to move. He walked towards me cautiously. I pulled my earbuds out and waited with the most delicious anticipation for what would happen next. I wanted to run to him. I wanted to jump into his arms and tell him how grateful I was that he was still here with me. I wanted to hear him say that he cared about me, that losing me almost killed him, that he was mine and mine alone.
Instead, I stood and waited.
For a moment, I thought that he was going to walk out and not say anything. But just before reaching to open the door and leave, he turned to me.
It was as if it happened in slow motion. His left hand came up and grasped my chin gently. I still had a small bandage on my temple, but the cut from the car window had closed and was beginning to fade. Likewise, the bruise, which had been a dark blackish-purple color upon my arrival home, had now faded into soft greens and yellows. He tilted my head to the side and he brought his right hand up to tenderly stroke the bandage. His hands were still wrapped, and the contrast between his soft skin and the scratch of the tape was intoxicating. I wanted those hands everywhere.
For the first time since coming home, I felt truly safe.
I reached tentatively to touch the dressing on his side, but he stepped even closer to me and moved his left hand from my chin to cradle the uninjured side of my face. Now he held me captive, hands on either side of my head, thumbs caressing my cheeks, and his hurricane blue eyes looking directly into mine. This was our moment. This was the moment that we didn’t get to have when we went hiking. I smiled at him and tried to let my emotions shine from my eyes that were now locked with his.
“Nea…I’m sorry.”
His hands fell back to his sides, and he dropped my gaze and left the room without another word.
I felt like the air had been knocked from my lungs. ‘I’m sorry’. That’s it? After literally sharing a near death experience with him, after almost kissing him, after trusting him with my life…I get, ‘I’m sorry.”
I stood there for a moment in complete silence.
I didn’t run that morning. I went back upstairs where I crawled into bed and cried myself to sleep.
That had been almost a week ago.
**********
My birthday was tomorrow. Despite my protests, my dad had arranged for us to go out to a fancy dinner. I was hesitant for us to go anywhere together considering what had happened the last time I went out on an excursion. However, my dad convinced me that the entire protection team would be there and that the place had already been checked and secured earlier in the week.
It was a new restaurant owned by the daughter of one of his work colleagues. Located in an older part of town, the decorators had imported stained glass from old churches and pubs that had closed down over the years. Dad had shown me some snapshots of a few of the rooms, and it was a really beautiful space. The dining rooms looked warm and inviting, and the stained glass was breathtaking. They hadn’t gone with a particular color scheme, so each window was different. The place hadn’t officially opened for business yet; but my father, being the negotiator he was, got the owner to open up specially for us tomorrow night. I think he told her that it would be a good ‘test run’. I didn’t love it when he used his government position to get special treatment, but I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that it made me feel better knowing that we would be the only ones there.
Dad had informed me that we would be getting all ‘dolled up’ for our date. Luckily, I had just the dress hanging in my closet.
It was a green lace dress that was fairly modest in the front, but completely backless. It wasn’t tight, but it certainly hugged my curves in all the right places. I bought it on a whim last year and had never worn it out. In essence, it was the perfect birthday dress. I had a gorgeous pair of strappy black heels to pair with it. Now that my cut had almost healed and my bruises were light enough to be covered with concealer, I felt like myself again. Healing on the outside had helped me begin to heal on the inside. I no longer immediately thought of the attack every time I looked in the mirror. It was good. Things were finally getting back on track and moving in a good direction.
I hadn’t seen Matthias again since that morning in the gym. And it was for the best. I now knew that none of my feelings were reciprocated. Just like my face and soul were healing, I felt that my heart was healing too.
**********
The morning of my birthday, I happily scurried downstairs to make myself some coffee and breakfast. It was early and the house was quiet.
On the counter was a small package wrapped in brown paper with a simple bow and three bunches of colorful flowers tucked into the ribbon. It was absolutely beautiful. Just my style.
I had told my dad “no gifts” this year. With everything that had happened in the 2 weeks since coming home, all I wanted was a simple day with the most wonderful man in the world. Any other gifts were unnecessary, in my opinion. He had reluctantly agreed; and so far, he had kept his promise. Until this morning.
I exhaled over-dramatically and said to myself, “Ugh, dad! What part of ‘no gifts’ was confusing?”
I was tempted to leave the gift there in some girlish act of defiance, but it was such a sweet little gesture that I just had to open it. As I peeled back the paper, I discovered a stack of DVDs.
“Awww, dad, you shouldn’t have,” I quietly whispered to myself.
Looking through the stack, I realized that I hadn’t seen any of them. They were all old classics. ‘Swing Time’, ‘Shall We Dance’, “The Gay Divorcee’…and…‘Top Hat’.
These weren’t from my dad.
Looking more carefully at the covers, there it was. ‘Starring Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers’, ‘Starring Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers’, ‘Starring Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers’, ‘Starring Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers’…
The heart, that I thought had started to forget, was immediately filled with the longing that I had been trying so hard to ignore.
There was a security camera in the kitchen. Locking my eyes with the lens, I stared straight into in and mouthed a silent, “Thank you.”
I didn’t know if he was watching, but I hoped with every ounce of my being that he was. Everyone gets a birthday wish, right?
**********
That night as I got ready, anticipation sat heavily in my stomach. He had bought me a present. He had given me Fred and Ginger. While it could have been just a friendly gesture, my gut told me it was more than that. It meant that he was still thinking about me…
I made sure that every curl was in place and my makeup was perfect. Knowing that he would be there tonight was all I could think about.
At 8 o’clock sharp, I descended the stairs to meet Ben. We had decided that, for security purposes, my dad and I would arrive separately. Matthias would be bringing him to the restaurant right from work.
For the first time since meeting me, Ben didn’t make a smartass comment. He actually smiled. When I got close enough, he took my right hand in his and brought it to his lips, kissing my knuckles sweetly.
“Happy Birthday, Linnea. You look gorgeous.”
“Why, Benjamin, that was incredibly gentlemanly of you. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, fuckface. Ready to go?”
I laughed out loud as he extended his elbow for me. I linked our arms and we walked outside to the car waiting in the driveway. He opened up the rear door on the driver’s side, and I slid in gracefully. I was bound and determined to stay poised and totally in control of this night.
Ben made his usual small talk as we drove. It was about a 20-minute ride from the house to the restaurant; and as usual, he kept me smiling the entire time. I really was thankful for his presence and his energy. I had resented him at first because of who he wasn’t. Now, I was so thankful for who he was.
The front of the restaurant was beautiful. While all of the windows and carpentry out front were brand new, everything had been treated to have an old, rustic look. No signs were up yet, but it was very obvious that it would look wonderful once all the pieces were in place. Ben pulled into an alleyway between the restaurant and the neighboring building. Through the dark windows of the car, I could see two more security guys standing on watch. Dad really did have the place covered.
Ben parked and quickly hopped out of the car to escort me upstairs. Again, I marveled at how sweet he could be when he wanted to. As we reached the second-floor side entrance, he leaned over to give me a soft peck on the cheek.
“Have a good night, asshole,” he said with a sweet smile.
“Thanks, bitch,” I replied, with my own smirk.
I pushed open the door and was met with an enchanting sight. In the middle of a small, private dining room stood my dad. He was wearing a tuxedo and holding a bouquet of pink and white camellias.
The soft glow of the candles on the table was only enhanced by the stunning stained glass windows all around the space. There was a small bar on one side, behind which was a kitchen. The tantalizing smells wafting through the room meant that dinner was already in the works. Aromas of garlic and rosemary swirled around me, making me acutely aware that I hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast.
“Hi, honey. God, you look so beautiful. So grown up. I have to say, I know it’s only officially been a few hours, but 25 suits you.”
“Thanks, dad. And what about you? I knew that tonight was a formal occasion…but a tux? You outdid yourself, you handsome devil.”
“Anything for my girl. Now come on, sit down, have a glass of wine, and tell me about your day.”
He wrapped an arm around my shoulders and guided me towards our table. He set the flowers down next to my seat; and like the true gentleman he was, he pulled my chair out for me. He allowed me to sit, and gave me a kiss on the top of the head before taking his own seat.
I was feeling comfortable. My dad was here, we were in a beautiful restaurant for dinner, and I had officially gone five whole minutes without thinking of Matthias.
Then, as if on cue…I saw him.
He stood, shrouded in partial darkness, against one of the walls with a hand in his pocket. He was wearing what looked to be a dark gray suit jacket, white shirt, and some sort of dark printed tie. He looked good. He looked damn good. And then I saw them: suspenders. That bastard was wearing suspenders. For my money, there was nothing sexier in the world than a man who could wear them well. And dammit, he was certainly a man that could. His broad chest and thick waist made those suspenders my new favorite fantasy. Fate, it seemed, was a very cruel mistress.
He was looking at me. In that moment, I was so glad that I hadn’t seen him when I walked in. I would never have been able to keep my cool or even stay on my feet if I had noticed him before now. He obviously hadn’t shaved in a while and the stubble adorning his face made him look even sexier than usual, if that was even possible.
As if the night hadn’t already taken a sharp turn, he stared right into my eyes. His stormy blue orbs raked the length of my body and I felt totally exposed under his sultry gaze.
‘No, Nea. Don’t do this to yourself.’
Luckily, my dad was there to bring me back to present.
Matthias was not the guy from the hike. He was not the guy who told me about loving Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers. He was not the guy who almost kissed me on the hilltop. He was not the guy who held my hand in the ambulance for the whole ride to the hospital. He was just some security guy who worked for my dad. Nothing more.
I broke his gaze and turned all of my attention to my dad. He had picked a succulent wine for us to sip while waiting for our food and I almost moaned out loud after the first taste. This was what a birthday should be. Good company, good wine, and a bit of conversation.
“So, sweetheart, I know that you said ‘no presents’”, my dad said while pulling a small box out of his pocket, “but I saw this a couple months ago and had to get it for you. I was going to send it to you this summer, but I’m so happy that I get to give it to you in person. I hope you like it.”
Inside, was a delicate silver chain with a tiny aquamarine stone. It was so beautiful.
“Dad, I don’t even know what to say! It’s absolutely perfect! I love it.”
“The aquamarine signifies wisdom. It also means that you are courageous and have a fighting spirit. I couldn’t imagine a more perfect stone for you. I know that I’ve told you this before, but I am prouder of you than my words could ever describe. I wish your mother was here with us to see what an amazing woman you’ve become…what an amazing woman you’ve been for some time. Two weeks ago, when you came home and I almost lost you…I just…it made me afraid on so many levels. My main concern, of course, was the thought of losing my daughter. But underneath that, was the fear of the world losing you. You have so many gifts to give and so much talent and love and bravery. When I used to go to your parent teacher conferences, I never cared about your grades. You are smart enough and resourceful enough that I knew you’d always do well academically. No. What made me proud was when the teachers told me how good you were-how nice you were to all the other kids. You never excluded anyone. You were a kind soul, even at such a young age. That is your gift. Your heart is what you bring to the world. And I can’t wait to sit back and watch.”
I didn’t have the words to thank him. How do you respond to something like that?
I rose from my chair and walked to his side of the table. He stood and met me with open arms. For several minutes, we stood and held each other.
Before he released me, I whispered in his ear, “You. It’s you. All I ever wanted was to be you.”
Footsteps coming from the direction of the kitchen brought us out of our moment. Lydia, the owner, smiled warmly and walked towards us with two impeccably perfect looking plates of food. As dad and I reclaimed our seats, she began to describe our dishes.
“Good evening, you two. We’re so glad to have you with us tonight. This evening’s meal is grilled rosemary pork chops, roasted garlic gorgonzola mashed potatoes, and herbed mushrooms in a white wine sauce. I hope that everything is to your liking. My staff and I will be downstairs if you need anything at all. As you requested, we also prepared a plate for each member of your security team. Please enjoy.”
With a sincere smile and a final nod, she walked past the bar and through a door leading to the main dining area downstairs.
“Oh, my God, dad. This literally may be the greatest thing I’ve ever seen,” I said, staring at my plate.
He gave me a wink, before picking up his fork. “Happy Birthday, Nea. Dig in, sweetheart.”
I gave him a big, bright grin. And just before trying my first bite, I quietly added, “Thanks for feeding the guys. Ben will be talking about this for months.”
“It was the least I could do. They work around the clock. Couldn’t have asked for a better team.” At this, he turned just in time to see Matthias stealthily slipping into the small kitchen area behind the bar holding his plate. “Enjoy your dinner, son,” he said warmly. Just before disappearing out of sight, Matthias’ gaze locked with mine again. His look was soft and intense, not unlike the one he had given me on the hilltop the day we went hiking. The look he had given me just before our almost kiss.
‘Nea…don’t.’
Dad and I made casual conversation as we ate. The food was mouth-wateringly good. The pork chops were tender and flavorful and the white wine sauce on the mushrooms was insane. However, the mashed potatoes were the best. Gorgonzola cheese was one of my favorite things in the world. I wondered, momentarily, if dad had relayed that information ahead of time, or if this was just some happy coincidence. Either way, I knew that I would be requesting these…a lot. I know that I said I was against my dad requesting special favors; but these mashed potatoes were worth the potential scandal.
As we were finishing the main course, dad’s phone started to ring. He looked at it before shooting me the look and standing up from his chair. I knew it well. That look meant, ‘I’m going to answer this and I know you’ll hate it, but I’ll keep it as quick as possible’.
Upon hearing the chair being pushed away from the table, Matthias materialized from behind the bar, apparently intent upon following my dad.
“Nea, I need to get this, honey. Sit, enjoy your wine, and keep Matthias company. Decide what we’re having for dessert! I’ll be right back.”
Matthias moved to trail him out the door.
“No. Son, you stay here. Ben is right over at the top of the stairs. I’ll grab him on my way out and take him with me. You stay and entertain my beautiful birthday girl.”
Matthias just watched my father walk out. He glanced back at me before looking away and lowering his gaze.
Fine then.
I grabbed my wine glass and rose from my seat. I’d been admiring the stunning windows in this room since we were seated at the table. This was my chance to get a closer look.
There was one that caught my eye. It was a beautiful tree with layer upon layer of color. Browns, golds, blues, and reds bled into one another and swirled around the delicate branches. The center seemed to glow as if the setting sun had been captured just as it had dipped below the horizon. The panels of glass seemed to flow into one another, almost as if it were a watercolor painting instead of a window.
I didn’t even hear him come up behind me.
“That one’s my favorite too.”
They were the first words he’d said to me since ‘I’m sorry’. As much as I hated it, his voice sent a shiver down my spine.
Without turning to face him, I sadly replied, “Yes, it’s really beautiful. My dad picked a good spot for tonight.”
I was trying to hold myself together. I could hear my voice cracking with emotion, and I knew he could too. But I couldn’t go down this road with him again. It hurt too much.
“Nea”, he said softly. “Nea, please look at me,” he pleaded.
“No.”
“No?”
“Matthias, I…I can’t.”
Instead of asking again, he stepped in front of me and looked me right in the eyes.
I could feel my walls crumbling, but I refused to give in. I was strong. I knew what I wanted and what I deserved. The look in his blue eyes was killing me, but I kept my head held high and bravely met his stare.
“Even when furious at me, you’re still so beautiful,” he said, shaking his head. “The way your dad talks about you is amazing. He’s so lucky to have you in his life.”
That did it.
“Stop!” I yelled, as I put both hands on his chest and shoved him back. “Stop pushing me away and then saying bullshit things like that! Stop avoiding me for days and then leaving me presents! You can’t do this to me! Do you know how hard these last two weeks have been? Do you have any idea? I felt safe with you. I feel safe with you. You saved my life and you don’t seem to care. I had to hear from Ben that you got stabbed. BEN! You weren’t even with me at the hospital when I woke up. You were everything I needed, and then you just left me. I have never wanted anything in my life the way that I want you and it’s KILLING me that you don’t feel the same!”
He stepped back towards me and reached for my hand. I pulled back and stood with both arms at my sides, resolutely waiting for his response with my chin held high. He took a deep breath before looking right into my eyes.
“Nea, do you think this has been easy for me? I was supposed to keep you safe. I was supposed to take care of you. But I couldn’t. You ended up in the hospital with bruises and stitches! That fucking destroyed me! I sat by your bed as long as I could. Leaving that hospital room was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. My heart shattered. You are amazing. You are so fucking amazing. You are smart and kind and selfless. You care about everyone around you. Do you know how hard it’s been getting briefings from Ben every day? Knowing that he gets to be near you all the time and I don’t! Seeing you tonight in that dress is torture because you are the sexiest woman I’ve ever seen. But that’s not why I want you. After only 48 hours with you, I told you about Top Hat. Do you know how many people know that about me? None. Zero! I absolutely cannot lose someone else that I care about. And I hate feeling like this because I know that no matter how much I care, I will never be able to keep you completely safe. I NEED you, goddamit!”
And there it was.
Our admissions hung in the air around us. I felt breathless and shaky. I needed something to anchor me back to the Earth.
“Fuck it. I can’t do this anymore.”
Before I could ask what ‘this’ meant, there was a hand at the small of my back and one tangled in my hair. He pulled me to him and crashed his lips against mine.
This was no ‘getting-to-know-you’ kiss. It was fire and longing and two people who couldn’t deny what was between them any longer. There was no build-up. I immediately opened to his searching tongue and met it with my own. He angled his head and pulled me even closer, if that was possible. I could feel the long, hard lines of his body pressed against the curves of my own. One of my hands went to the back of his neck, just to make sure that, this time, he wasn’t going anywhere. I could hear a growl come from his throat and the hand at my waist traveled up to the span of bare back exposed by my dress. His warm hand on my skin forced a purr from my own mouth. The initial intensity of the kiss faded and we stood wrapped in each other by the glow of that ethereal window. His kisses were drugging and sinful. His skilled tongue and soft lips twisted and wrapped around my own. With one last suck to my bottom lip, he released my mouth and pulled away. He did not, however, let me go. His hand remained on the exposed skin of my back and the other hand traveled to the side of my face, those strong fingers almost unconsciously caressing the spot where my stitches had been.
For the second time tonight, I was at a loss for words. I’m not sure that words had been invented yet for the feelings that were surging through my body. I needed just a second to collect my thoughts and figure out my next move. I gently moved out of his embrace and walked over to the table where I had left my phone. Picking it up, I fired off a quick text before setting it back down. Matthias didn’t say a word, he just watched me intently.
“Who are you texting?”
“Ben. I want to know how much longer my father will be on his call.”
“And…?”
As if on cue, my phone vibrated with an incoming message. I checked it quickly before setting the phone back on the table.
“He said about 3 or 4 minutes. Matthias, I…”
“No. Not now. We can save that conversation for later. Right now, I just need you to come back over here. Your dad will be back soon, and I really want to do that again.”
My heart leapt and I felt a lightness in my step that hadn’t been there in weeks. I walked towards him with purpose. I wanted his hands back on my body and his mouth on mine. I reached him and placed both hands on his chest, each one grabbing a handful of suspender. I dragged him towards me slowly and licked my lips.
“Like the suspenders, do you?”
“Oh…you have no idea…”
Our lips were just about to touch when it happened.
Loud pops and the sounds of shattering glass pierced the silence; and instead of pulling me into his arms, Matthias pushed me to the ground.
Gunshots. They were gunshots.
Matthias grabbed his radio and immediately began barking orders.
“Agents 3, 4, 5, and 6, assess situation and sweep the perimeter! Make sure that both cars have a clear alley exit. Detain assailants if possible. I’m with Linnea. I’ll be taking her out the side entrance and down to vehicle 2. Ben is with her dad. They are closest to the back exit. Ben, get him out and into vehicle 1. Team, go NOW!”
I was trembling with fear.
“Nea! Nea, listen to me! I am going to get you out of here. Behind the bar and through the kitchen is an exit. It leads down to the side alley that Ben parked you guys in when you got here. I have two agents down there now clearing it so that we can leave safely. Stay low and get there. I will be behind you until we are in the kitchen. Then I need you to get behind me as we leave. We’re going to be ok.”
I didn’t ask questions. Instead, I pulled him to me and kissed him hard. After all it took to get us here, I knew we would be ok. I knew he would get us out. I just…knew.
He nodded to me before yelling, “Go!”
I crawled across the hardwood floor towards the bar. I stayed low just like Matthias had told me to. I didn’t look behind me, but I could hear him. Every now and then, he’d ask for a status update or yell at one of his guys to move to another location. Now I was really seeing why he was hired for this job. He was good. He was very good.
As I reached the kitchen, I pushed myself up to my feet. Matthias was right there. One arm went around my shoulders; and even though he didn’t say anything to me, he gave me a quick squeeze, just to let me know that I had done well.
As we got to the exit, he stepped in front of me, shielding me from whatever may be waiting on the other side of the door.
“Nea, we’re going to move quickly. When we get to the bottom of the stairs, get into the car as fast as you can. Get to the lowest point you can in the vehicle and don’t raise your head until I give you the ‘all clear’. Got it?”
All I could do was nod.
Drawing his sidearm from its holster, he barked another update to his team. “This is Agent 1. Exiting building now. In 3-2-1…”
The door swung open. I could hear shots, but none of them were coming from the alley below.
The next few seconds happened so quickly. Looking back, I don’t even remember going down the stairs and getting into the car. It was surreal, as if it was happening to someone else. Following his instructions, I got down as low as I could and curled up on the floor in the backseat. The driver’s side door slammed and Matthias quickly started the vehicle and pulled onto the street. I had my hands over my ears to drown out the sounds of the continuing gunfire. Tears of fear and relief flowed freely from my eyes. Fear for my dad, Matthias, Ben, and the rest of the team…not to mention Lydia and her staff who had been so wonderful to us tonight. Relief that Matthias had kept his promise. We were out and we were ok.
I could hear the muffled sounds of him on his phone communicating with the rest of the team, but I couldn’t focus enough to hear any of the conversation. After what could have been hours, but was, in reality, probably only ten or fifteen minutes, I felt Matthias reach into the backseat and tap me on the hip. I knew this was the ‘all clear’.
I sat up and leaned forward so that my head was between the two front seats. I needed to see him and be close to him. My left hand found its way to his right shoulder and he briefly turned his head to brush his cheek along the top of it. An unspoken, ‘I’m here.’
“Nea, it’s ok. We’re ok. Are you hurt? Please God, say ‘no’.”
“I’m ok. I’m ok. Thanks to you,” I said, my voice shaking. I left my hand where it rested on his shoulder, giving the muscle a soft squeeze.
For a few moments, we sat in silence, quietly assuring one another that we were safe.
Once I felt my breathing return to normal, I took in our surroundings. I didn’t recognize a thing. Why were we driving out of the city? Why wasn’t he taking me back to the house?
“Matthias, where are we? Why aren’t we going home?”
“Nea…we can’t.”
“What? Why?”
“I’ll explain everything when we get there.”
“Get where? Matthias, you’re scaring me…”
“Nea, we need to disappear for two or three days. We’re headed to a safehouse.”
“Ok. So, my dad and Ben will meet us there, right?”
“No. It’s just going to be you and me.”
He must have felt my immediate panic.
“Nea, I promise to tell you everything. Everything. But right now, we need to get someplace safe. Everything will be alright. Do you trust me?”
I didn’t answer. Instead, I extended my free hand towards the dash. Matthias immediately knew what I needed and took his right hand off the wheel. His fingers tangled with my own and he brought my hand to his lips for a soft kiss.
I sat there in complete and utter shock. Luckily the soft caress of his fingers against my own kept me grounded in the moment. I did my best to focus on his touch, knowing that I would have the full picture soon.
A safehouse…
What the fuck was happening? Why wasn’t it safe to go home? Was my dad alright?
And how was I going to survive being alone for three days with this man…?
**********
@virgosapphire79, @thihaf, @dauntlessmetalmom, @iammarylastar, @son-of-a-bbitch, @lostinvoyage, @vaisabu, @thehound-and-thebird, @dean-67-impala, @bookwarm85, @alexandrajackson93, @darebearxo, @mimigemrose, @ashtotes, @soldatbarnes, @anditcametopass, @hows-my-hair, @nickysurfer28, @queensoybean, @emmysrandomthoughts, @dream-on-dina, @scissor-win-ski, @to-hold-me-and-to-hide-me, @misshyen, @inkinterrupted, @james-k-delaney, @niktwosixteen, @feminamortem, @b-j-d, @pathybo, @adudewritingpoetry, @danleto97, @angelswannawearmyredshooz, @thestarlighthotel, @beautifulramblingbrains, @inopinion
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hello! i’m rosa, the pair of hands behind the wheel of ur local rad girl bad girl (sad? girl?) Poet & fuckface, sivvie park, & the icon is the both of us -- her fc, my existence (aka very sleepy, but glad to be here). pls pls PLS like this post of if you wanna plot, and i will be in your inbox... ASAP. anyways here are some fun facts/a quick summary. mentions of mental illness, substance abuse, abuse, parent death and bulimia bbs! (I PROMISE IT’S NOT GRAPHIC. JUST THERE. VERY SKIMMED OVER. THANK YOU. LOVE YA)
like this post if you wanna plot tho btw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
dad was a respected writer, poet and professor at your local top tier uni, mother, his trophy wife (but never made a trophy). young siv thought cinderella and her prince (and any other fairytale duo) had nothing on their relationship, and until a certain point she was right
papa park instilled a strong love of lit in his baby girl and didn’t believe in starting slow at all -- he took advantage of the malleability of the young mind to get her started on the greats: fitzgerald, proust, baudelaire, etc. the end result being her baseline personality as a child was that of a reckless wild thing with the capability to both communicate and exhibit a deep understanding of things, people, and the world around her. that, and a fluency in korean, english, french and a love for language acquisition.
her father also ingrained a strong sense of justice which becomes relevant when we talk about THE SCANDAL
so papa park notices sth fishy going on in his department, that fishy thing being a fellow professor -- one with tenure, something he does not have -- being a sexually abusive fuck with his students. he reports it without question, expecting justice. instead of justice, he’s told to keep mum or else. he chooses the latter, privately going to the police, and his department responds by flipping the whole affair on him, making him the monster -- nothing comes of it eventually, there isn’t enough evidence to prove he’s guilty. but he loses his job, loses his good name to rumour and blacklisting.
(this happens right before sivvie’s 14th birthday)
to put it bluntly, after this, life sucks.
her father drinks and becomes anything but himself, her mother works herself into a ghost worthy of matching her husband, and sivvie is reduced to a deeply depressed, anxious, bulimic and angry little soul. very angry.
it’s a rough 2 years and then her dad croaks. he just dies. and what’s awful is that it does make life easier.
she writes through all of this, sivvie is an obsessive journalist
as an adult she hates her dad a lot less, if not at all. she moreso hates the world that made him become that person lol
miss. daddy complex tbqh
if anyone ever brings up The Scandal she’ll fight you right away no questions asked. she’s............ scrappy! (and full of unreconciled rage!)
that being said she was a delinquent between the ages of 14-17 before she chilled tf out (she isn’t chill. she’s just more chill than she was before. the difference between the sahara desert but in hell vs la. but in purgatory maybe??) and realised she wanted to go to uni and become a kickass poet writer teacher TRIPLE THREAT like her dad because the only comfort she’s ever had is a good ass story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ok that was long thank you for reading the Story of Her Life here is some more on. Just. Her
vice vice baby, v-vice BABY (please read that to the tune of “ice baby.” thanks.) she has ZERO impulse control and no REAL CONCEPT of dealing with her emotions in HEALTHY, PRODUCTIVE ways. bbgirl loves to rage, smoke, drink, roll, fuck, attempt parkour at 3am after indulging in at least 2 of the aforementioned
she’s mama bear passing but honestly a baby in need of care. too bad it’ll take ten years for her to let you do that. literally if she likes you enough and you punched her in the face, broke her nose and then started crying as a result, there’s a good chance she’d be comforting you lol
always has something to write on and with on hand. v huge source of stress if she does not because she does not like writing things on her phone or laptop because she is --
very bad with tech. it’s embarrassing please don’t mention it
huge fan of gum, hard candy and lollies. woot woot grandma alert she’s always gna have those in whatever bag she’s carrying because hey? aren’t we all? dying? bitch?
very crass. unless she’s in class. then she’s a classy bitch. the difference is so succinct that it weirds out a lot of people at first honestly
the former is very indicative of both her tendency and talent to compartmentalise. she can’t deal with being an entire human all at once very well
she loves conspiracy theories. they’re an odd source of joy.
jaded romanticist. won’t admit it but she still wants to believe in happy endings.
honestly though she’s a good time, very charming, charismatic and knows how to read and adjust for people! hit her up if you’re having a bad time and/or wanting a [FREDDIE MERCURY VOICE] GOOD TIME
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Get to know me:
Tagged by talented/total babe @offansandflames ♡
Rules: answer 92 83 statements (i skipped some boring ones srry), tag whomever you please.
THE LAST.
1. Drink: pabst blue ribbon, yes im white trash
2. Phone call: mom
3. Text message: my bestfriend
4. Song you listened to: keaton henson, to your health
5. Time you cried: erm a lil yesterday but like deep convo tears
HAVE YOU:
6. Dated someone twice?: a relit ciggarette never tastes the same
7. Kissed someone and regretted it?: Not enough to recall at the moment.
8. Been cheated on?: I haven’t taken many partners, so to my knowledge, no?
9. Lost someone special?: Yes
10: Been depressed: :,)
11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: my life from 15-19 tbh, not in the party, neurotypical fashion more along the Wtf Pls exPlain type way or for shits n giggles
LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:
12-14. Baby pink and blue, black.
IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:
15. Made new friends?:Yes if online counts? Very beautiful and enchanting spirits who i already love
16. Fallen out of love?: never do if its real, cuz im a romantic//also think u always care a little for those you really loved
17. Laughed until you cried?: yesterday actually like rllllly good because my girl dropped her entire jug of wine right before opening it. The universe flicked us off dirty.
18. Found out someone was talking about you?: Yeah, some good, some bad, some wild. Idk.
19. Met someone who changed you?: Yes some beautifully, made me fonder, some not so lovely but thats ok (try to make it ok)
20. Found out who your friends are?: I have fucking one bestfriend who i hold to that certain standard shes my lover/ soul mate and weve been through a fucking ride n shes still my number one. If others let me down i find ways to make it bittersweet.
21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list?: yus
GENERAL
22. How many Facebook friends do you know in real life?: Idk some r family and people from all the schools i went to. I dont care for facebook much.
23. Do you have any pets?: one black, perfect cat with lil rays of auburn going down her back, i named her clementine. Also 4 dumb n rlly cute dogs live with me. I like one a lot, Luna, shes my princess. (Yes i admit favorites idgaf/ she also knows she’s my fav n takes advantage)
24. Do you want to change your name?: mydad originally wanted to name me Xena (after xena princess warrior) whom i developed an intense crush on later.
25. What did you do for you last birthday?: yo lol i dont know i turned 22 i just had drinks and smoked with my bestfriend
26. What time did you wake up?: didnt check, i usually wake up multiple times n go back to sleep If i can
27. What were you doing midnight last night?: either in my gfs car or just getting home
28. Name something you can’t wait for?: my classes to start again, mini roadtrip to Gainesville and maybe being able to see my little cousin soon.
29. When was the last time you saw your mom?: lik e 2 seconds ago.
30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life?: sjdufjekwns
31. What are you listening to right now?: Keaton Henson
32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom?: lol nah not that i remember
33. Something that’s getting on your nerves?: the state of the Union, how 2 get my smol dogs to stop barking, why do ppl have to live w abusers and when will my witch powers allow me to cast them off into The Void, my general discomfort n lack of motivation. To casually name a few ,,
34. Most visited website?: ao3, Tumblr
RANDOM SHIT:
35. Mole/s?: lol?? Moles can b cute, i have a few.
36. Mark/s?: plenty, one in particular tho i have on my upper forehead not like harry potter sttle unfortunately, its all hidden near my scalp
37. Childhood dream?: i always wanted to do something that would let me swim with humpback whales in natural habitat ofcourse or track the lives n rituals of wolves and then i was like mayb ill just be aschool counsler, all of which i still kinda wana do.
38. Hair color?: blonde
39. Long or Short hair?: i have medium length hair but i like both
40. Do you have a crush on someone?: I literally always have a crush on someone, idk crushes to me means you make me happy and blushy and if you make me laugh, i crush.
41. What do you like about yourself?: i could say i like how i am when im with someone i love. N that some ppl are able to confide in me, id say my empathy but idk i can be a fuckface too.
42. Piercings?: tongue I got snakebites, industrial, bellybutton, reg ol ear piercings too.
43. Bloodtype?: i dont know o.O
44. Nickname?: cookie monster when i was younger, lali, lion, coocoomanga(my dad) renren, rin, my mom says lil shit endearingly and i got the habit.
45. Relationship status?: basically married
46. Zodiac sign?: Aries
47. Pronouns?: She/they
48. Favorite t.v show?: i binge and am not ashamed, supernatural, classic spongebob, south park, parks n rec, modern fam, a haunting, me and my mom watch ancient aliens 2gether , Steven Universe, Adventure Time, the fucking x files, malcolminthemiddle, etc, my animes as well are all shoved in here in my heart. Naruto/free/haikyuu/oourans host club/ HxH etc
49. Tattos: 5 and one on the way, matching one with my love
50. Right or left hand: Righty most def
51. Surgery?: luckily no
52. Hair dyed in different colors?: I maintain the blonde i had at like six, its naturally dirty brownish? At one point i dyed it platinum tho
53. Sport?: In my anime
MORE GENERAL
54. I’m about to?: Finish some arts and crafts for some letters im making (: and then a smol walk
55. Waiting for?: some inspo,
56. Get married?: its not very important to me. But if my partner became passionate about it i would be rite there w em
57. Career?: I’m majoring in psychology/minor in education
WHICH IS BETTER?
58. Hugs or kisses?: depends on who but I’m a sap for both
59. Lips or eyes?: Eyes, give me them soulful orbs
60. Shorter or taller?: no preference
61. Older or younger?: You can be a shithead at any age, so no preference.
62. Nice arms or nice stomach?: eh,, not sure to be honest. I love hands and forearms, so i suppose arms?
63. Sensitive or loud?: u gotta be both at least every now and then. Either extreme will be bothersome though
64. Hook up or relationship?: eh past experiences make hook ups generally uncomfortable n left me feeling ace/aceromantic for a good portion of my teen yrs but im not impartial
65. Troublemaker or hesitant: ive calmed down but im not hesitant unless my gut says so
HAVE YOU EVER?
66. Kissed a stranger?: yes
67. Drank hard liquor?: yes
68. Lost glasses/contacts?: glasses, yes.
69. Turned someone down?: as a chick in miami ¿¿¿ of fucking course
70. Sex on the first date?: lol yes
71. Broken someone’s heart?: seems dramatic i dont feel like i have sincerely done that, just hurt them.
72. Had your heart broken?: In a way mostly by close friends / family
73. Been arrested?: when i was 15 for dumb shit like trespassing
74. Cried when someone died?: yes
75. Fallen for a friend?: i crush on all my friends because i love alot
DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
76. Yourself?: Yes because Rock Lee would want me to
77. Miracles?: i think miracles are a byproduct of a fucking amazing universe.
78. Love at first sight?: i think of it as a magnetic pull n interest not love
79. Santa Clause?: i fucking love christmas, idgaf
80. Kiss on the first date?: yup
OTHER
81. Current bestfriend?: @mariekankerr 7 years n countin babe
82. Eyecolor?: blue
83. Favorite Movie?: Lilo and Stitch, Pulp Fiction, The Iron Giant, A Fish Called Wanda, Murder By Death, Knights of the Round Table, mel brooks in general, The Changeling (bt like the oroginal one not w Angelina jolie it came out in like the 90s?) Spirited Away, Clue, Hot Chicks, A Bronx Tale
I tag:
@shamelesssasukestan @hotmessmuffin @narutoandsasukearecanon and i suck at this so just go for it and tag me so i can lurk on u
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