#guess i have a topic for therapy. just needed to vent rn and think it all through
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#really am not liking being back home#im not handling it very well#suddenly im exhausted again and depressed and anxious and i feel numb and nothing is enjoyable#i got a glimpse of something beautiful and then was forced to return to my life#im realizing of how empty it is. the monotony.#talking to friends is good but im just. so tired. i wanna talk so badly but the fog has rolled back in#the hotel room was small but my house somehow feels so much smaller#i didn't realize how badly this place affects me and that i CAN feel happiness without pain lurking underneath#i fucked my ankle up while i was gone but was STILL happy. i had a limp and it felt like nothing#everything feels so much heavier and pronounced here#the limp is painful here#i just dont know what to do about this bc it's not like i can just leave again#guess i have a topic for therapy. just needed to vent rn and think it all through#god. the day i got home i cried. i cried yesterday. i cried again today. im so sick of this#.personal
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