#fuck I do nothing but time travel do I
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Offshoot of my "team Ro time travels to the founders era" post because @prinzgnomeovonchaos infected me with brain rot in the notes
So buckle in baby it's time for
Sakumo and babyKashi time traveling to the warring states ✨️
So first thing to get out of the way; Modern Hatake's and warring states era Hatake's do not hold up to the same standards.
The Hatake's during the states were a very small clan with a very big reputation. Hailing from Iron, they were an almost famous wild clan even all the way in fire country. Distantly related to the Inuzuka's but leaning more towards wolves than dogs.
They had a proper kekkei genkai and everything, unnaturally fast and strong, often born with some form of enhanced senses— be it smell, sight, taste, or even touch. Their white chakra fed into it, and they'd feed their chakra with diets of raw meat and the occasional light cannibalism during some special clan celebrations and rituals.
Unfortunatley Sakumo knows very little about the above because he was very young when his clan was pretty much all wiped out. He was raised by the only other survivor, his grandmother, who was pretty young herself when the clan got wiped, and unfortunatley was never all too concious of many of the rituals and traditions of her clan until it was too late.
Sakumo grew up to village standards and was mostly declawed because of it, and Kakashi is only doubly so. And with that dulling of all the different traditions and specific diets also came the slow fading of their bloodline limit, which was already pretty subtle if you didn't know what you're looking for.
Anyways moving on, and if you want more details for my headcanons ab warring states Hatake's vs modern standard Hatake's look at my other time travel post bc I talk ab it more there.
So Kakashi is like 6 (holy shit he's a BABY baby)
Google keeps giving me conflicting numbers for Sakumo's age at his death so we're just gonna shrug and say he's in his early 30's.
Then for the founders;
Madara (23)
Hashirama (23)
Izuna (19)
Tobirama (18)
Sakumo is staring at these guys going through it bc they are BABIES to him. And like look, he's used to working with or even occasionally under people much younger than him, but like. Oh man that's the shodai hokage. And he's like a toddler.
(He's a 23 year old man but Sakumo is kind of having a crisis so he can't register that)
So like. All the founders have major daddy issues, right? Like we can all agree that's plausible? I'm so sorry I just think it'd be *really fucking funny* if they look at Sakumo and just kinda. Yeah.
You know what I mean.
Anyways;
No idea how they got there!! This is set maybe a week before Sakumo offed himself but now he can't kill himself bc that'd mean abandoning Kakashi to the fucking warring states.
Kakashi fits the warring states standards alarmingly well actually. Honestly I think even for that time period he's still scarily young to be on the field. People are giving Sakumo looks like 'it's so hard what we've been forced to do to our children, the battles we've pushed them into, the things they've seen and done all too young'
Sakumo is going *hrrg.* and having a good long look in the mirror actually. Proper crisis, lots of guilt, Kakashi should not be out in the field this young and at least before he was mostly getting baby missions but now they're stranded in time and keep running head first into trouble.
I want Izuna and Kakashi to fight and even though Kakashi absoloutley should NOT win that battle I want him to win just so that Madara and Tobirama can make fun of him for losing to an actual child
Izuna is mortified he wants that brat DEAD
Uhh I have some more but I'm at work and actually hit post too early on this post so I had to come back to rush add all these edits bc I meant for it to stay a draft I could keep adding too later. So I'll just come add more later fr
#birds fic talk#time travel#fuck I do nothing but time travel do I#whatever i can accept that as my “thing”#naruto#fanfiction#hatake lore#dogteeth kakashi#kakashi hatake#hatake sakumo#madara uchiha#uchiha#uzhiha izuna#tobirama senju#hashirama senju#warring states period#time travel au#hatake
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astarion origin playthrough worth it just for all the extra moments where he does the "sad wet cat" face
#bg3#bg3 spoilers#thoughts about media#astarion#*kisses his forehead* my awful little bastard man... i love you and your big sad watery eyes.#IT'S SO FUCKING QUIET THOUGH IF YOU YOURSELF ARE PLAYING HIM GOOD LORD#I'M SO USE TO HIM COMPLAINING TO MY TAV!!!!#OR BANTERING WITH HIM OR KARLACH OR WYLL!!!#I MISS HIS THEATRICS!!!!!!!#not that it's ENTIRELY quiet. until i found karlach i was travelling with shadowheart lae'zel and gale.#and let me tell you. gale and lae'zel do NOT shut the fuck up if they are together.#they were literally having an entire tinder date while we were trecking through the woods to go get karlach.#i NEVER knew they talk so much because while i've travelled with them individually in past saves...#...i've NEVER had them in my party at the same time!#gale is actually pretty nice to lae'zel! he asks a lot of questions but doesn't condescend her as he does others sometimes.#that's probably because he's afraid of her though. I would be too were I nothing more than a wizard with 8 strength.#I do like how you can look at pretty much any two companions and get a well written and generally enjoyable dynamic!#It feels like they considered that a lot of people would want to maybe pair off the companions they didn't romance with each other!#and wanted it to be easy for really any pairing to work... if a person just paid attention to their shared interactions.
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okay genuine question that has nothing to do with any of my current wips, and is just some silly thought i’m letting entertain the darkest corners of my mind for now — as a reader, if you were reading a story tagged with time travel, would you want to know the backstory/lead up to said time travel immediately or be revealed to it as whatever character that had time travelled remembered it?
#again this has nothing to do with any of my fics rn!!!#not even mordor in which time travel would be legitimate at this point lmao#i’m just thinking about how a story like that would be formatted#would we begin with the cataclysm of the time travel?#would we begin when the main character decides to fuck around and find out?#or would it be more fun to only have hints of *who* time travelled and such?#have it be a plot twist?#idk#what would you prefer as a reader cause i know what i would prefer#(i fuckin LOVE plot twists.)
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seetttthing scalding hot take but honestly i feel no sympathy or theoretical sadness about altea being blown to bits. the few alteans we DO know are all assholes. clearly the universe isn't missing much. in fact, if you look at the only canon universe that DOES still have altea--- they go on to be just as bad as the galran empire if not even worse.
so yeah. maybe zarkon did the universe a small favor before he went truly off the deep end.
edit; just found out alteans destroyed Diabaazal long before zarkon destroyed altea. nothing ANYONE says can convince me alteans are anything *but* the real villain of the show. they got what they deserved.
#calling coran an asshole only bc he's... well. kind of an asshole.#and honestly speciesist.#the first episode always makes me seeth mad over that one line 'look at your synapses firing away in their primitive brain cage!' bc#apparently only alteans can make observations and only alteans have 'evolved' brains#what pidge said wasnt even that ground breeaking of an observation. anyone who wasnt actually blind would be able to see the lions together#that one line was the perfect glimpse into how alteans ACTUALLY behaved and how they ACTUALLY viewed all the planets they colonized.#bc i do not believe for a second that they were actually a 'diplomatic race'.#that's just sparkly language for space colonizers.#and all the times he rambles on about altea while the paladins are stressed. he doesn't even consider their feelings or notice.#their constant dismissal and even insulting of the humans' biological needs and social behaviors. aint no fucking way a diplomatic species#that has traveled the universe and seen and allied with billions of species would behave like that. and it isn't just allura. it's coran to#they constantly compare everything the humans do to what the alteans COULD do. again; first episode allura gets mad at these teenage kids#for not being able to fiht a gladiator 'fit for an altean child'. she gets mad at them for laughing and bonding (the ENOUGH! scene at dinne#allura is self explanatory.#honerva is self explanatory (she was a major asshole long before she became haggar)#lotor is self explanatory#i havent watched past se 6 bc i refuse to but the small bit i have seen from romelle? also an asshole.#and again. alllllll of the comet au alteans.#even alfor is kind of douchey at times. i mean clearly he raised his daughter to do nothing other than kiss his ass.#vld#anti allura
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cannot believe that in 2007 the eighth doctor adventures writers just decided to put toxic yuri in their show. they did that for me
#not me going insane over 2 minor recurring villains#but literally what the fuck is going on with the headhunter and karen#what if an amoral assassin and a normal office worker decided to become partners on a whim & now they time travel and commit crimes together#like what?????#the headhunter could not give less of a shit about other people and doesn't think karen is useful at all and yet just keeps her around#and karen's like yeah she hates my guts and also she makes me kill people. it's a laugh though can't complain#and i'm just meant to be normal about that?????? huh???????#also the way they both just flirt with lucie every time they see her is so funny#karen's like hey babe!!!! how are you!!!! do you want to join us!!!! while holding a knife to lucie's neck shdjshs#while the headhunter's like ah lucie miller the thorn in my side [saves her life] this means nothing [saves her life] you disgust me [saves-#doctor who#big finish#i've finished s3!!!! whoop!!!!#my thoughts are why does lucie miller keep getting turned evil and can it keep happening bc it's hot. who said that#my only issue with this format is that it's very adventure based. which yeah it's called the 8th doctor adventures#but i wish there was more breathing room for lucie. the doctor keeps being all sad (fair his life is awful) but lucie's going Through It#and never gets a chance to really process anything#also the retroactive continuity errors make me laugh#'i'm 900 years old' no the fuck you're not! you still have the time war yet buddy!#i like to think they're just signs of 8's swiss cheese memory#i hope there's books set in this era. i'm sure nobody will be able to tell me bc they gave up 20 tags ago agdkhsjshsjs
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so wait… furina is the name of the archon role that “furina” had to play
wouldn’t make more sense narrative wise to give her a name of her own?? like scara gets his own epic chapter about him ridding himself of his past and adopting a new name then proceed to ignore said name in favor of “hat guy” but the actress playing “furina” doesn’t get to be known for her own name?
like people of fontain (partly maybe) know the truth so why not let her free? let her enjoy the simple human life she so so longed for? even the other furina wouldn’t want this
#i think her story is a better use of the (give character name) mechanic that wasn’t really needed in scara’s arc imo#like yeah it’s cool and all but we literally saw him throw the actual physical manifestation of his past into the fucking void!!!#i personally think it was kind of wasted on him on top of me thinking that idea was entirely stupid to begin with and hyv keeps proving tha#no one actually refers to him as wanderer or by the name they choose online.. its just scara#thats both bad marketing and confusing burying the character away from new players#and like the amount of shit u have to go through as a new player just to name ur weird huge hat angry little dude is just..#but imagine how impactful such a mechanic would be for ‘furina’ who spent all her live acting a role she wasn’t#at the end of all that agony do u think she could endure hearing people call her by that name??#unlike scara she did that for the people every moment of those 500 years knowing that the fate of every person is mere a breakdown away#there was nothing in that for her or for a reward she thought deserved.. just suffering on her own#it just makes more sense for her to want a different name a different identity that has nothing to do with that role#and again i think that mechanic is stupid anyway but if it had to happen i’d loved it more with ‘furina’#or idk give her like a clueless friend she gets to meet that keeps calling her a different name for reasons and her liking the name or smth#maybe give her a different role she gets to play.. or have neuvillette give her a name#same with scara i think it would have been a lot better if he went by a name he choose when all his previous names were chosen for him#i dont see how the entirety of genshin writers and devs agreed to this mechanic being implemented honestly#like traveler is literally there waiting for a single soul to address them by their actual name (the one we choose) but every time it’s jus#traveler traveler.. even their most beloved companion calls them traveler#like that alone should've changed the writers minds bc such a name would 1. either not ever be used or replaced by a nickname#2. the hell devs had to go through to not allow certain phrases and names and 3. the hell both teams will suffer should they add a new char#tl;dr stupid dumb mechanic but they should still give furina a new name#genshin impact#furina#fontaine archon quest#scaramouche
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I have spent literally years railing against time travel AUs. So I cannot stress enough that it is to my deepest shock and horror that
I might have an idea for one.
I’m so upset at this.
#there’s nothing inherently wrong with time travel AUs it’s just extremely difficult to do well#and they are a glut in the star wars ao3 tags#fuck me. ugh why#I’m not sure this will ever come to anything though because the mechanics are a mess#that’s part of my issue with them if you can’t reasonably explain how time travel fits to existing lore it breaks immersion#but I have 1) vague concept 2) self indulgent scene ideas 3) a couple poetic phrases that’s usually enough to get a fic rolling#wah.#I’m such a hypocrite
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the way i gotta suppress the urge to be annoying and stop every few hundred words to show yall snippets like hey! hey look how fucked up! hey look how sad! hey look how emotional! hey! hey look!
anyway we at 4k words now and the mood has Shifted
#who did this to you part 3#it’s not even that bad tbh like yall who know the time travel au Know what fucked up dio words look like but#idk there’s something about it that makes it so Real to me idk yknow?#sigh idk i just love them and the subtlety that comes with this being from eddie’s pov bc he knows nothing about steve and robin#or their dynamic or their history (which is very recent!!!) or the supernatural monster shit#and he doesn’t wanna know!! like he’s scared to ask!!! doesn’t even know how to ask#and idk a lot of fuckedupness comes from that nuance yknow? idk if you know. most of yall do bc you’re brilliant readers#and i’m kissing your hands 🥰🤍
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Oh my god. Y'all. Lloyd's a natural blond.
WU IS HIS FATHER ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
#ninjago#lloyd garmadon#lego ninjago#the recessive genes DO NOT LIE#im sorry im sorry my sister clicked the ep of the time travel season where they. go back in time (40 YEARS MY ASS WTF) and i havent watched#this season and nothing is making sense.#but i saw blond who agaian and LOST IT#it hit me <3 wusako truthing#when will i ever figure out the in-shiw timeline. absolutely fucking never.
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i don’t think i’ve ever felt this lost in my life. tbh
#feeling sad? sure. hopeless? been there done that. anxious as hell? at least once a week. but lost? no. not really#and that’s really fucking scary because i’m not familiar with it and i just don’t know how to deal with it#i can’t stop thinking that i’m running out of time because i’m 25 and i don’t think i can afford feeling this way#taking a break from uni sounds good in theory but in reality? again. i’m 25. i need to at least achieve one thing in my life holy shit#it’s SO hard to see the good even when it’s right in front of me or someone points it out. like having a job or studying or getting to#travel or even just having friends ARE achievements but i always want More More and More i am addicted to wanting more cause it feels like#nothing i do is ever enough. and now i’m adding feeling lost because i’m finally acknowledging the fact that i don’t know what i want to do#with what i’m studying or how to get a different job in the future when i almost have no experience and everything is just so frustrating#because i simply don’t fucking know. i just don’t. i can’t afford not knowing!! everything is so messy rn you would think i’d be thriving#after seeing louis and meeting aria and traveling to germany and i am genuinely so happy those things happened but fuck man there is always#the Bigger Thing taking over and it makes me feel like an ungrateful brat i just don’t fucking know man. maybe i am an ungrateful brat#but it’s just so hard to be happy when you’re feeling so lost with everything in your life and yourself#anyway i just. needed to let that out#negative#effie talks to the moon
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I don't want to go back to work tomorrow T_T
#quilleth in real life#i'm remote this week but still#i probably have a ton of emails#most of them not relevant tbh#i just don't want to#also don't want to deal with the 'so what did yu do on vacation?' questions#nothing. the answer is nothing i can't afford to travel and i'm a burnt out homebody#like damn idk what you think i'm getting paid or what my bills are coworkers but uh...you're wrong#legit had one of them be like 'oh you have student loans?' once#like uhhh YES! i'm a fucking millennial!! i know a very VERY small handful of people who don't!#sorry college wasn't affordable with a part time summer job when i was going#it wasn't even affordable with a nearly full time job either#especially with the program i work in there's always this awkward not entirely judgmental#but it certainly feels that way--pause when i say no i haven't travelled and am not able to
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So Reylos are now freaking out over episode 4 of Ahsoka cause Anakin showed up in what appears to be the wbw. I have not watched Ahsoka and don't plan to. I personally think that nothing will come out of this in regards to Ben Solos return. People think Leia sacrificed herself to send Ben there? If she sacrificed herself to save him then he wouldn't have gone anywhere he would have been alive.
Anyone who thinks there was planning or thought behind anything in tros is delusional.
Thinking they're setting up Ben's resurrection is almost as removed from reality.
#as I said years ago his return in some form is inevitable#ie: more content using the character- almost certainly exclusively in the mask and doing meaningless completely OOC villain antics#and obviously not live-action- cartoons comics books etc.#that will fuck up the timeline and make no sense#but the likelihood of Ben being resurrected and his story actually continuing forward is infinitesimal#they have made their bed and they have made clear their intention to lie in it#piss-soaked sheets and burning pillow notwithstanding#this is about finding an excuse to use HC in their show for fanservice and buzz#and that's as deep as it goes#I wouldn't watch any of this shit if you paid me but does this not destroy the ending of RotJ even more than it already was by implying#Anakin is not in a state of peace or really dead or ascended to nirvana?#he was one with the Force he should not be in any kind of purgatory or transitional dimension or whatever#but I suppose there is absolutely nothing scared and they've already shit all over everything that ending was about so why not#let's just go for the final insult and say Anakin's redemption wasn't real and he wasn't accepted into the afterlife#why let any Skywalker have anything#not one of them can have ever accomplished even he most hollow of victories#somehow we have to give THIS to Rey too#she time travelled and forced him to save Luke#NOT THAT I'M BITTER
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shout out to this is how you lose the time war for being the only piece of media to never let me down <3
#have You thought about time traveling lesbian assassins today? you should#nyxtalks#genuinely tihylttw is the one piece of media i would recommend to everyone ive ever met.#like i recognise angela isnt going to be for everyone. ive got my issues with it and its for sure like. a certain taste#but these guys? oh my god please read it#its some of the most beautiful writing ive ever read and im enamoured with the universe they created in so few words#honestly nothing i could say would do it justice i love this book so fucking much#its gay. they commit crimes. they write love letters. its perfect#(if anyone wants to read it i have a link <3 a pirates life for me and all that)
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.
#ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh fuck#just scream cried into a pillow for the first time in a decade#i just picked my ex up from the airport#first time seeing her since we broke up since she was overseas when i did it#and now im kinda maybe regretting it?? idkkkkkkkkkk#so i repeat#ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh fuck me#she just had to show up after 18 hours on a plane looking absolutely gorgeous#and smiling at me like she used to like nothings happened#i just wanted to hug her for the next 93 hours straight#but.#thats selfish#because i still dont know if we could have a future together#and she still wants to see the world and travel but im kinda ready to settlw down a little#and i know if i asked her shed abandon all her plans and move to nz permanently l#but i cant do that#so#ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh fuck me#sorry for the rant#being single is so simple#was* simple
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I’m so tired. I talk about being depressed because I’ll likely never have any semblance financial security and it’s always “oh you just have to change your mindset” and “work hard now and you’ll see that it pays off” and “the younger generations are so lazy/entitled” and never “that’s a valid response to an economy that has become so hostile to lower clsss people that they’ll likely never own homes or even just have disposable income”
#ppl my age get it but when I talk to older ppl#they truly have no idea just how bad it’s gotten#I’ll never have a house#or travel#or get to have the time to do things I love bc all I do is work#how do ppl do this their whole lives and just accept that as the natural order of things?#like you’re really gonna sit there and tell me that life should be nothing but working for shit wages ALL THE TIME#just so you STILL can’t make ends meet#let alone do anything or have anything nice for yourself#my family thinks I’m just being irrational and I just wish they would understand how dire this is#deep#personal#fuck capitalism#hell world
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trying to work out how old i think betty is
#i feel like before everything went to shit she was prob like 2 or 3 years younger than simon#but then between the crown and a thousand years passing and time travel that probably got fucked up a bit#im using simon as reference cuz i have nothing else to go off of iwnfuwwfirg#ok im gonna improvise a petrigrof timeline rn#they met when they were post graduate students. according to google the average age of postgrads is like late 20s early 30s#so m gonna say betty was like 29 and simon was 32#they stay together a long time i mean they wrote a book together. ill say like. around a decade. betty is now 38 and simon is 41#at some point during that time they get engaged#then the crown happens and betty jumps into the future#a year after that the war begins (i dont think we have any indication that betty knew ab the war do we?? if thats a thing then pretend she#went to the future a year later idk)#also marceline was born 2 years ago. shes in this timeline too bc shes relevant to simons story#when simon is 44 and marceline is 4 the bomb drops#hes 3 years into the ice king transformation#so his mental aging is like... slowing down#and his physical age is speeding up#marcy is 6 and hes 46 when they meet#and shes around 11 and hes 51 when he leaves#then a thousand years passes and betty appears in the future#shes 38 and simon is insane#shes 39 when she gets magic mand and 40 when she gets golbd. damn that woman cannot catch a break i didnt realize before now how fast all#that happened#and simon is still over a thousand years old. until he gets reset to how he was before the crown! or at least thats what i think happened!#so as of cawm hes like 41 again. and betty is dead#damn ive been calling him grandpa but hes barely even grandpa aged. yet. he is by fionna and cake/obsidian time tho#ok yeah im satisfied w that#adventure time#betty grof#simon petrikov
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