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thesunshinecourts · 2 months

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countdown to tsc: apr 7., 2024, 23:58 pdt

2. digging your fingers into fresh dirt // renee walker, after lazarus

When Renee gets to the garden, her fingers are still stained with blood.

It had taken Abby’s most soothing tone and Wymack doing a passable imitation of Aaron’s impatient candour—the same language as Wymack’s, but less heart-filled bluster, more blunt force trauma—to get Renee to leave the room. She’s still not sure she should have, but Abby’s voice had been gentle when she’d said, this isn’t like Matt. Giving him something to believe in will come later.

Renee doesn’t know if she’s ever seen Abby so angry and horrified. It’s worse than how she looked at Kevin’s injuries, that very first night. It’s worse than how she looked at Neil, both times, after the Nest and after his father. It’s almost as devastated, Renee thinks, as the way she looked when she held Allison tight to her chest that first night after Seth.

Wymack is better at holding his expressions in check, but Renee knows him. There had been a tremor in his knuckles when he opened the passenger car door. He’d gotten it under control fairly quickly, to his credit, but Renee had noticed.

Renee had thought, I am not the only one who must draw on all my reserves to keep steady.

She breathes out, then in, as if the smell of growth in the world around her can flush through her body. When she was a second year, Seth had taken a biology class with Dwayne. It had nothing to do with either of their majors—she remembers Juan making some sort of joke about growing pot, and Seth elbowing him with a sidelong glance at Allison, who had rolled her eyes and told them both that she thought they’d be lucky to keep a fake plant alive in the shithole they called a dorm—but Seth had liked it better than anyone had expected, occasionally offering up things he found interesting from the units on horticulture.

There had been a joke about photosynthesis once, something that had been mostly earnest information, but he hadn’t been able to resist throwing in some teasing at the end, always trying to make Allison laugh. Renee feels a sudden wave of indescribable, quiet grief when she realises she can’t remember how his joke had gone.

There are four plants to her left, still in the plastic pottles you buy them in at the store. Renee remembers Abby talking about a sale a few weeks ago, and wonders if these are those same plants. It’s been a demanding few weeks, she thinks. Life is often unkind to those that cannot move of their own accord.

She’s not really thinking about it when she walks over and picks them up. She puts them together, two by two, and squeezes her fingers around two pottles per hand. There are probably gloves somewhere; a trowel too, maybe.

Renee does not care.

Kneeling down at the edge of the garden, there’s a patch with looser soil than the rest. It is poor behaviour, she thinks, to start messing around with Abby’s things without asking permission first, but Renee does not have the space in her yet to hold back. Abby will forgive her, which is not an acceptable reason to do something, but Renee is so angry. She spent her whole night transforming terrified grief into determination and a plan, and then the six-hours-and-then-some drive from Castle Evermore back home with nothing in her mind but Jean. The impossibiity of him.

The impossibility of him still being alive. The impossibility of her getting there in time, and even that’s still to be determined. The impossibility of how much she aches, looking at him and thinking about him and praying for him. Four hundred miles on the I-77, and all she could do way pray.

It was a very human thing, Renee thinks, to walk into Evermore to get him out. Stephanie had been proud of her, and Abby had called her brave, and Andrew had looked at her with that innate knowledge of someone who understood what it meant to take someone under their wing, and absolutely none of their thoughts and love and understanding change the fact that Renee walked into Castle Evermore with more fear than faith.

She digs. One hand into the soil, then the next. There is blood on her fingers still, beneath the nails. Part of Renee has the uncharitable thought that she hopes it’s Zane’s, stray flecks from when she punched him. More of her accepts that it’s Jean’s. She does not know when it is from: when she first knelt at his side on Riko’s bedroom floor, when he was carefully settled into her car, when she and Wymack lifted him into Abby’s house, when she sat beside him and held his hand as those broken, wounded sounds ripped their way from his throat and drove right into her heart, piercing it through, over and over, just as the way the ugliest part of her, buried beneath therapy and anger management and the most wilful calm she has ever had to cloak her body in, wishes it could do to Riko.

Jean’s blood beneath her fingernails, spattered across her hands, buried into the soil. She’s planting a flower she does not know the name of, and all she hopes for is that Jean will bloom.

Please, she prays, tugging the roots apart with a care and precision she did not feel capable of two hours ago, listening to Jean’s screams. Please, she prays, pressing the plant into the soil, cupping her hands together to scoop the dirt, helping it settle into its new home. Please, she prays, patting down the soil, warm earth meeting her palms like a balm.

Please, she prays. Stephanie says you are not done with him yet. She was right about me. Thank you for getting us this far. Please. Please. Please.

“Renee?”

It’s Abby’s voice, exhausted and haunted and utterly wrecked. She still manages a wan smile when Renee looks up at her. Abby doesn’t seem to notice that Renee has been co-opting her garden, or maybe she’s too raw to care.

“You can come back in now,” she says, like she knows it’s both a gift and punishment at once.

Renee nods, then stands, brushing the dirt off her trousers. She looks at Abby as she approaches, trying to choose her words. To ask how he is would only invite more sadness; to ask if he’ll live betrays how deep her fear has run.

“I’m sorry,” she says in the end, quiet but sincere. “That must have been… very difficult.”

The look Abby gives her is brief, but pained. “He breaks my heart as much as any of you,” she says, quickly, fervently, “but that is never a thing to apologise for.” Abby looks so sad. It makes Renee ache, but this is not the type of thing she can wipe away. “Thank you for bringing him here,” Abby says, and Renee feels rocked with it.

“Thank you for letting me,” she says in return, and neither of those are entirely what they mean, but it is enough. Renee will always walk into Castle Evermore to save Jean, and Wymack and Abby will always open the door when she arrives in South Carolina. There is no version of this story, Renee thinks, where they follow any other script.

This is what it is to be Foxes, after all.

“He’s still not quite himself,” Abby says. There is a part of Renee that finds this sentence amusing; Abby has never met Jean, not truly, only from Kevin’s stories. More of her is somber. She knows what Abby means. “But I think he’ll feel — perhaps only marginally, but I think he’ll feel more at ease having you beside him. I’ve done what I can, for now, and there will be more medication and treatment and dressing of his wounds, much more before the night is through, let alone before he is recovered, but —” She exhales, long and low. “He is alone, and in pain. We can’t do much more about the second one. But he can have you back.”

Renee nods, setting her jaw as Abby steps back to allow her through.

“Then he shall have me until I am no longer needed,” Renee says, and thinks, and perhaps some time longer after that.

Abby gives her a careful look. “That could be a very long while,” she says, but she does not offer any sort of objection.

“That’s okay,” Renee says. “I don’t mind waiting.”

#renee walker #jean moreau #aftg #jeanee #post lazarus #abby winfield #countdown to tsc #tsc countdown 2 #ok i had a very hectic stressful day lmao but at like 11pm pdt i finally started reading lazarus #so i whipped this out quickly for today on the countdown LOL i knew i wanted to write renee today so i was like #lazarus time u gotta. u gotta #jean & renee #blood mentions and severe injury reference cw #seth references!#abby & renee #countdown to the sunshine court #i realised just now that technically jean isn’t even in this but he’s so much the subject of her focus that it’s like. weeps

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livvyofthelake · 2 months

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mr bets on losing dogs and his ridiculous knife kink are at it again 🙄🫶

#i’ve liked this chapter tbh #i was expecting all the falling action to be mid to bad but it’s actually been good sometimes #never on the level of WE’RE SO BACK but you know. it’s also not SO OVER #it’s evened out in the end. the epic highs and lows of c****** r*****. as they say #also it’s literally just that i don’t care as much anymore because this whole era is finally on the outs #turns out all we needed was for it to stop snowing and for me to read a fucking book #good to know. will keep in mind for future cringe eras!#the hard part is going to be finding a way to get MAD back into tsc in the time allotted #like i need to be crazy crazy. timeless video era insane.#what really needs to happen is i need to start rereading lord of shadows #and then we’ll be set most likely #i simply need a taylor album that is not attached to something stupid in my mind #i realized tonight that my anti midnights bias is just due to the fact it’s the horrors album #i could have been a midnights lover this whole time if it had simply come out a few months later!!! but it’s over and done. we persist

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fuzzballsheltiepants · 1 month

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A (very) incomplete list of things I loved in TSC: (obviously, spoilers)

Jean having no sense of time at the beginning. he has literally zero idea how much time has passed and has no frame of reference. it feels like weeks; we only know because we read the original series

the shift once again, this time from Jean's POV, from Nathaniel to Neil! it being a mark of respect

seeing how Neil really relayed the deal with Ichirou to Kevin and Jean (that Neil totally glossed over in TKM)

all of Jean's internal and spoken insults for everyone around him but especially all the Foxes

Jean's complete and utter disdain for short people and how many there are, just, everywhere. why are short people allowed? they should be illegal

Andrew's single word in the entire book being, "Leaving." just classic

the whole scene where Jean watches the final game? where he is so invested in how the Foxes are doing that when they win he shoves the tv?

Jean mentally adding Andrew into the Perfect Court because they need a goalkeeper, deciding that if Kevin and Riko die it would be ok because Jean, Andrew, and Neil were enough to rebuild around

Jeremy standing at baggage claim playing with a yo-yo until he gets it tangled in his headphones

Cat teaching Jean to cook

Jean being adorably horny and constantly swayed by beautiful people

Cat thinking Renee is hot

Jean just...not understanding how people function if their every move is not controlled at first? and then starting to come around?

Jean buying clothes! picking out things for himself!

Jeremy buying people in need gift cards because he can

Barkbark von Barkenstein being the silent unwitting center of a tiny war between Jean and Jeremy

Rhemann starting to realize what Jean/the Ravens have been going through at the hands of their coaches and needing to take a minute or fifty to get over it

Jean finding himself adopted into a queer family and just rolling with it

Jeremy and his complete and utter avoidance of every possible personal problem. nothing to see here, folks

Jean's glee when the Trojans first curse, being absolutely certain that this is revealing some deep well of depravity

the Trojans' techniques for staying sportsmanlike on the court (while really aggravating the fuck out of their opponents)

the fact that Neil and Jean together are basically a buddy comedy (which I NEED MORE OF)

Neil from an outside perspective as a weird little man who can negotiate without flinching with dangerous people, navigate an unfamiliar city after briefly studying printed off Mapquest instructions, coolly order a hit in the middle of a restaurant, and develop a convincing lie at the drop of a hat

Neil's tactless but relentless kindness?

"A cool evening breeze. Rainbows. Open roads. Friends."

#tsc #the sunshine court #tsc spoilers #aftg #all for the game #jean moreau #jeremy knox #catalina alvarez #neil josten

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kevindavidday · 2 months

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Okay TSC rambles and spoilers under the cut

first of all, i would do anything for jean moreau so jot that down

jean's backstory gave me so much grief because in the middle i truly did think 'hey, what if he had family he could reconnect with?' and the way he started crying only after he found out about his sister? the absolute gentleness in jean moreau's heart is just unparalleled and i love him more than life itself

the way he defends kevin throughout claiming he earned the right to be arrogant and constantly referring to him as the Court's Queen...just kevin and jean in general...it feels like a dream to me...'take kevin's name out of your ignorant mouth'...

the fact that even in the start jean seemed to trust kevin's touch more than anyone else's

kevin day in general - their little secret of learning french, getting him magnets and postcards with stories and memories, making promises...he is singlehandedly the reason why three of my other faves found a will to live

one of the best parts for me was realizing how different neil is from someone else's pov but i can tell kevin's arrogance has rubbed off on him and vice versa because kevin was much more 'fuck it' with his attitude in tsc - so refreshing to see

the mafia hit at the end was absolute perfection actually like neil catches hint of trouble and immediately has his uncle sending someone out...the butcher neil potential is off the charts...truly a wesninski at heart and yet the near gentle way he treated jean like boy has learnt so much from his foxes i'm so proud of him and his 'i've got him, coach'

finally...jeremy knox. he's everything i expected and more actually but i'm so so curious about his backstory like i neeeed to know more

absolutely delightful to see these characters again idk how i'm supposed to go back to daily life now

#tsc spoilers #the sunshine court #aftg #jean moreau #jeremy knox #jerejean #kevin day #neil josten #kevjean

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otdiaftg · 1 month

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WHAT'S NEXT:

The out pouring of love for this blog has swept me off my feet. I knew the logic behind the follower count, but this weekend proved to me without a shadow of a doubt just how much this fandom cherishes these characters and this story.

I am overwhelmed with adoration towards every. single. one. of you.

I took the weekend to finally recoup after the whirlwind of this past year but wanted to take a moment now to answer some of the questions I've seen pop up and to inform you all of what my plans are for what's next.

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS:

WILL YOU CONTINUE THE ACCOUNT THIS YEAR?

This took me a long time to ponder and I wanted to make sure I was in the correct headspace to answer it. Short answer: No.

Long answer: All For The Game is near and dear to my heart. And the reason I began this account was because the dates for 2023 matched that of the dates they were meant to be in 2006. To continue it in the year 2024 would mean the dates would be completely wrong and a lot more logistics would have to occur beforehand.

But also-- I'm not the best when it comes to technology, especially when it comes to BOTS so every post that was published was typed out, formatted and scheduled by hand by me. I did not have help. I did not have proofreaders, or editors, or managers. I contacted all the artists myself, sorted through every single page of the artists to find matches to the story, read and re-read the books for exact or guesstimation of dates/times, and made a hell of a lot of typos on the way through all that.

There was probably an easier way that I could have done all this. But I didn't/don't know it. So that all boils down to: It’s a long and tiring process.

Don't get me wrong, it was worth all the hours. And all the sleepless nights I had getting everything done and out. I already thanked my support network, but without my wife and my best friend being there to make me another cup of coffee, walk our dog, do the chores and generally make sure I didn't crumble from the pressure -- none of this would have happened.

So, putting myself through that again, after everything that has happened this year alone-- felt like it would cheapen the experience I had when the dates won't even match.

That being said.... 2034 isn't that far away. >__>

WILL YOU BE DOING AN OTDITSC?

Short answer: No.... sorry.

Long answer: As stated, it is VERY hard to organize what and how I did. HOURS spent researching, organizing, scheduling, etc. Time spent away from my family and other hobbies. NOT time I regret (need to keep prefacing that) but time I want back now. At least for a little bit.

It also doesn't sit right for me to start an OTDITSC when I know some people are still waiting for their copies. There are so many of us out here (as I've come to find out) and I don't want to exclude people's enjoyment and connection that this account gives. I also feel like the more posts about TSC out there, the harder it is for those who are (lets say) waiting for the physical copies to block/mute spoilers. We can say a tag is enough, but this is the internet. And that's not always true.

And lastly, personally, TSC is still SO VERY NEW. It's not even complete yet and we don't 100% know when the next one will be published. I don't want to start something, get to the end of the timeline, and than have a huge gap between posts that will potentially be moments in the second book. It doesn't feel fair to their story, to myself, or to the followers of this account to have incorrect information for something I love so dearly. If I'm doing it. I want to do it right.

SO, WHAT'S NEXT?

Well. A lot. For me personally, as well as this account. I don't want to leave everyone in such a finite way. I love this fandom. I love its art and writings and the abundance of talent and joy that it exudes.

So first, for myself, as well as those artists who agreed to help with this account, I want to post, for the next 40 days Artist Highlights (that means this account will still be active until Friday, June 7th).

Every day, I will post about an Artist and the work that I wanted to post but couldn't fit in. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, these artists are the reason this account thrives. Art, in a multitude of forms, speaks in a way words can not. And these artists prove that.

I'm excited to show them off for a couple more weeks at least. They are all wonderful people.

AND, FINALLY:

To also tie us over, I am opening both my personal account as well as this account to questions.

Questions regarding the process, the story, the best movie out in theaters, whatever. I will be answering your questions (as fast as I can) until that last Artists Highlight day (Friday, June 7th). After this day, I will leave the questions answered up for a week, and then remove/delete them from this account. I want to make this more of an archive of sorts and will be updating the Timeline Page as this progresses as well, so you can move freely within the timeline.

Keep in mind that I am only one person, have a family and a full-time job-- so answers may be sporadic, but I will answer them.

This has truly been such a pleasure. And whether I get questions or not, I see you and I appreciate you. I hope your life is filled with everything you ever want, everything you need, and that you never let it go.

🦊 🧡- Kelysium

#aftg #all for the game #neil josten #tkm #the kings men #the foxhole court #andrew minyard #palmetto state university #psu foxes #andreil #on this day in aftg #otdiaftg #palmetto state foxes #otdi all for the game #nora sakavic #the foxes #on this day in all for the game

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tallgreg · 19 days

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*not-really-a-spoiler spoiler alert for TSC but it’s really all conjecture*

Jean and Jeremy clearly have mutual attraction, but I’m not sure how Jean’s recovery is going to progress and what’s going to go down on Jeremy’s side of things in TSC2. But if it goes in a way where they become a thing, I’d imagine their first kiss like this:

Jeremy and Jean’s first kiss is not passionate nor surprising. I think it’d just be like taking a sigh of relief.

It’s relief for Jean because he finally found the right person at the right time. He found someone who wasn’t a savior (because Jean would’ve made USC work with or without Jeremy’s help), just did what Jean needed without keeping track. Jeremy is what he didn’t know he needed.

It’s a relief for Jeremy because Jean never offers to carry some of the weight on Jeremy’s shoulders. He just shoves Jeremy aside and carries it with him in silence. Jeremy initially thinks Jean is just filling his role as his partner, but starts catching the differences between how Jean describes past Raven partners and how he treats Jeremy. Starts noticing that this isn’t transactional. Jean is what Jeremy didn’t know he could have.

Jeremy knew he’d run out of steam in giving Jean what he thought Jean needed after the summer was over and he had to live at home again. He stops giving. But Jean doesn’t. Jean took a lot in the beginning because he was relearning how to be human and accepting himself as one. But Jean is a quick learner and Jeremy feels stranded. Jeremy feels like he hasn’t given enough and the fact he can’t give more has him thinking he’s failed. Jean doesn’t even blink when Jeremy starts fading. He’s not one to stop and coddle Jeremy, he keeps going because neither of them can afford to stop but carries Jeremy with him.

Jeremy doesn’t think he deserves Jean. Jean is trying to relearn what he does and doesn’t deserve. But one thing is clear: they both deserve the respite they’ve found in each other. It’s a relief for them both that they’re able to express how much they care for each other in this way.

Their kiss happens when they’re alone in the living room. Jeremy rests his head in Jean’s lap while Jean fiddles with his curls. Somewhere along the way they found warmth in small touches like this. It isn’t Jean who kisses Jeremy. It isn’t Jeremy who kisses Jean. They both just lean in slow but unhesitant and follow through.

They both know they could take this somewhere, that it would be safe and easy and lovely to get lost in each other, but they’re just tired. It’s enough to just stay in this moment. They fall asleep like that and don’t wake til the early hours of the morning.

Jeremy wakes up first but manages to not startle Jean into waking as he gets up. It’s the weekend so he’s staying the night in his and Jean’s bedroom. He pushes their beds together, but doesn’t mess with the sheets. He goes to collect Jean and they don’t say a word as they both trudge their way to bed. Jean treats the beds as if they were always this way and climbs under his own sheets, watching as Jeremy climbs into his own before closing his eyes. They fall asleep in minutes. Jean still somehow wakes up with his hand in Jeremy’s curls though.

#the sunshine court #all for the game #aftg #jeremy knox #jean moreau #brainrot #nora sakavic

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humongousgothskeletonfarm · 2 months

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TSC CHAPTER ELEVEN SPOILERS AHEAD

STARTING OFF THE CHAPTER STRONG AS FUCK DISASTER BISEXUAL JEAN MOREAU AWARENESS

picturing jean in a pair of raybans is good for my mental health

“Missed a couple spots. Need a hand?”

jeremy u flirt

do the trojans ever realise that jean is NOT IN FACT deaf and standing right in front of them when they are talking about him?

oh ok so chapter 11 is in fact worse than chapter 10

if anyone reading this has ever believed that they deserved the abuse, trauma/suffering they’ve experienced, i’m here to tell u right now that nobody deserves that and it is not ever ur fault, no matter what others might say or try to convince u. whatever happened to u is unequivocally not ok. please seek help from a professional if u are worried about urself or others in ur life.

if u have ever felt uncomfortable or violated in certain situations just know that no matter how ‘big’ or ‘small’ the situation may seem (i use these terms loosely because i do not believing in ranking peoples traumas), ur feelings are 100% valid and u always always deserve to be respected and heard.

i hope u know that u are not alone and never will be.

sending lots of love to all of u

wtff jenkins is a girl?? did we all know this or have i just read too many fanfics always thought jenkins was a guy?

It was sacrilegious even in the privacy of his head, and Jean hunched his shoulders against a blow that never came.

fuck that’s a good line. traumatic as fuck and makes me wanna cry for all these boys have gone through but god as an ex-catholic raised queer person i can tell u this line struck hard even though i cant relate to the specifics of the scene

Jean didn’t mind cooking, but he didn’t say that. This was the first time his room truly felt safe and right, and he was content to hold onto it for as long as he could. He closed his eyes again, but now his thoughts were snagged on Jeremy. At length he broke the silence to say, “Two beds would fit in here.”

jean moreau u are so loved

“You are not them,” Jean said. “Kevin would not have sent me here if you were.”

THE PARALLELS IN THIS BOOK ARE FUCKING KILLING ME PLS NORA LET ME LIVE IN PEACE THIS IS TOO MUCH FOR ME TO HANDLE

ANDREIL EXISTS IN EVERYTHING

Just because he had to meet with this man didn’t mean he had to speak to him.

jean, u diss aaron earlier in the books but really ur just the same as him

betsy dobson to the mother fuckibg rescue someone get this bitch a ‘worlds best therapist’ mug

and jean, dude do u know how fucking similar u and neil are, seriously like u guys should be besties like-

“It was not my choice,” he sent back in warning. “I do not need counseling.” He didn’t trust her at all, but there was no point spelling it out.

CHAPTER TWELVEE

dude wtf is it with me and napping while tryna finish this book, literally just accidentally fell asleep for 2.5 hrs when i could’ve been reading

“Imagine getting changed so we can practice,” Jean said.

king is fed uppp

“It’s not about size, anyway.” “Defensive,” Jean said, tugging his glove straps with his teeth. Jeremy straightened in indignation. “I don’t have anything to be defensive about.” Jean lost his grip and bit his lip, and Jeremy hurried on before either of them could think too much about that double entendre.

OKKKK JEREMY I SEE U

“That’s not—I do care. I want you to play with us, and I want you to have fun again. I want to see what you can do on the court and what you bring to our defense line. I want us to finally win this year after coming so close and failing too many times. But it’s just a game, Jean. Your safety and happiness will always be more important than our season.”

GOOD GOD ITS WHAT U DESERVE JEAN

“Every time you say that you take a year off my life. I’d really like to live to ninety, so please knock it off.”

now the trojans understand how the foxes feel when neil whips out his ‘im fine’ line,, also i’m never gonna stop saying that neil and jean should be besties it’s literally just a fact

“I do not believe you when you are drinking such filth,” Jean said, with a disapproving look toward her drink. Laila stared him down as she sucked a long gulp through the straw,

this book is so devastatingly depressing and explores some of the most horrible traumatic things that could happen to a person but it’s interspersed with some of the funniest scenes that it gives me whiplash

“Pat and Ananya have wanted to fuck Cody’s brains out for almost a year now. I really thought Cody moving in with them this summer was going to finally get that ball moving, but apparently not. It’s getting kind of pitiful.” “Pat and Ananya have been engaged almost as long as Cody has known them,” Laila pointed out as she fit herself against Cat’s side. “You can’t blame Cody for being scared of where they might belong in something like that.”

NORA GIVING US THE POLYAMORY WE DESERVE AFTER CUTTING KANDREIL FROM THE OG BOOKS LETS GO QUEER REP

YK THAT RUNNING JOKE THAT USC IS THE QUEEREST TEAM AND NOBODY HAS AS MANY GAYS AS THEY DO??? IM SO FUCKIBG HAPPY NORA HAS BASICALLY MADE THAT CANNON

CHAPTER 13333

jeremy is so hopelessly crushing on jean and that’s real of him

meanwhile jean:

Threat assessment, he told himself, and it was almost the truth.

sureee buddy

They’d arrived holding hands and dressed in matching cream-and-teal outfits. Even their gold-rimmed sunglasses and teal sneakers were identical.

well that is definitely an outfit!

“Speaking of happy endings, has Laila bought you a sex toy yet?”

EXCUSE ME

this whole scene was so fucking random but jean deserves great friendships

ANOTHER TRANS TROJAN LETS FYCKING GOOOOOO CONGRATS ON UR TOP SURGERY XAVIER

‘i’m sure the ravens wouldn’t have taken neil in if they’d known he was the son of a mob boss!!’

uhhhhh…

i don’t know how to tell u this buddy

dude i just cannot stop think about the whole new world of fanfics we’re gonna get now that tsc has come out like the aftg universe is expanding and becoming more detailed it’s gonna be crazy

chapter 14!!!

Jean eyed him. “For what purpose?” Jeremy looked to the ceiling for patience. “For fun.” Jean sighed as if Jeremy was the one being unreasonable.

oh jean we’ll get there eventually

Jean was a starving dog on a short chain who’d learned years ago not to bite back.

OH MY FUCKING GOD GIVE ME PEACE

MY CHEST IS ACHING AT THIS METAPHOR

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP THE PARALLELS ARE DESTROYING ME I CANT FUCKING TAKE IT ANYMORE

“You are Jean Moreau. Your place is here with me, with us. I’m your captain. You’re my partner. We’re supposed to be doing this together, aren’t we? Stop leaving me behind. Look at me.”

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry that he hurt you, I’m sorry that you’re still afraid to talk about it, and I’m sorry that you think I’ll never understand. I’m sorry that he tricked you into thinking you deserved it. But I’m not sorry he’s gone. I can’t be.”

“Neither am I.”

TEAR MY HEART OUT AND STOMP ON IT NORA JESUS CHRIST

everytime one of the trojans says ‘we’re here to listen whenever your ready to talk and open up to us’ and then they go and demand he tell them every secret he’s ever kept

kevin and jeans relationship in this book is so fucking well written, it’s tearing me apart and giving me so much life

they have so much shared trauma and the relationship is so complex but they understand eachother so deeply

He is not used to having a voice, and he has never had power. I cannot promise he will ever talk to you.” “I will wait as long as it takes,”

“Be careful with it,” Kevin said. “Be careful with him.”

“Night practices with Andrew and Neil,” Kevin said. “Obsessed,” Jeremy

exy fiend kevin day representation

also

“No, Jean is fine. As fine as he can be, anyway. Yes, I know.” (kevin when talking to someone ‘offscreen’) i just know he was talking to neil

She crossed the room and leaned over, catching Jean’s head in her hands so she could plant a kiss to the top of his head.

this is the love jean deserves

chapter 15:

“Your fourth line has a smart mouth, Coach,” Jean said. “I was hoping he would bite his tongue off in the fall and save us both some grief in the long run.”

jean i love u

Jean wished he had the common sense to shut up,

he’s so me

“And keep Kevin’s name out of your ignorant mouth,”

THEYRE SO IMPORTANT TO ME UR HONOUR

i keep forgetting that jean only learnt english after he moved into evermore and that kevin probably taught him but i love the subtle little reminders every now and then when he has to clarify a word, like when he has to ask what a ‘floozy’ is and:

due to egregious injuries.” Jean didn’t recognize that word, but since Lucas was already running his mouth, he didn’t get a chance to ask.

it’s such a good detail that just adds so much more depth to his character

“Permission to break his face, Coach?” Jean asked. “Denied,” White said.

SCREAMING

THIS IS SO NEIL AND WYMACK CODED I LOVE IT

JEAN MOREAU ON A MOTHERFUCKING MOTORCYCLE HOLY SHIT

catalina alvarez u wonderful human i love u

jean realising how big the world is and the fact that he’s explored more of california than any other place he’s been before is making me tear up he never should’ve been kept trapped inside he deserves to see the world

So long as she existed as fractured memories, she was safe and small and sheltered.

oh god don’t do this to me

Jean gazed out at the endless horizon, feeling small and infinite from one moment to the next.

beautiful, just beautiful, absolutely immaculate

A cool evening breeze. Rainbows. Open roads.

A COOL EVENING BREEZE. RAINBOWS. OPEN ROADS

SECOND LAST CHAPTER!!! LETS GOOO

“He is not going to hit you. Okay? We don’t do that here. You said you’d try to do better and that’s enough for us.”

starting off strong

You’re one of my kids now.

don’t mind me i’m just sobbing

no no no no no no no no no

holy shit no what the fucking fuck

don’t do this to jean rn oh my fucking god i’m sick to my stomach on the verge of fully crying right now

actually dreading reading on right now

um ok yeah so i read it and to anyone who hasn’t finished the book yet beware there is a graphic violent scene followed by an intense panic attack in chapter 16 that’s is very difficult to read

i did cry and all i can say is thank fuck for lisinski’s timing

Jeremy’s response was low but unhesitating: “I will not look away.” “I do not want you to look.” It frightened him how much it sounded like a lie,

only redeeming part of this chapter is that neil’s back but i’m still in so much shock over what’s just happened that i cant properly appreciate him

chapter 17 the finale:

feeling incredibly somber as i reach the end of the book

please god destroy anyone who has ever hurt jean moreau

nora’s really filling in all the plot holes left from aftg - why did nobody question why neil’s hair was dyed after evermore ????? why did nobody question neil being at evernote in the first place???

i’m laughing at neil’s map print-outs he’s so uncool, also i keep forgetting this is still meant to be 2007

jean-yves moreau oh my fucking god

“says who?” Stuart asked. “The dead kid?

stuart hatford u are so funny, is this where neil inherited is sarcasm from?

stuart hatford says fuck riko and so do i

Neil shrugged. “Do you have anyone who can take on local work?”

NEIL JOSTEN U ARE MY HERO I LOVE U U BADASS MOTHER FUCKER

Neil offered her a disarming smile that would never sit quite right on his face.

devouring these scraps about my boy

YOOOO WTF NORA RLLY JUST WANTED TO GIVE JEAN THE WORST FUCKING DAY HE COULD POSSIBLY HAVE HUH?? JUST DROPPED THE FACT THAT HIS SISTER IS DEAD MY POOR BOY

Neil filled in the finer details with an ease that would have been impressive to listen to any other day

- yes neil is incredibly smart, thank u jean for confirming to us

The only thing left to ask for was something he barely understood: “I want to go home.”

oh the complicated nature of home and one’s sense of belonging that persists throughout these books will never fail to make me feel absolutely everything. nora knows exactly what i want in a book

“I can see the kitchen. There should be a door out to where the dumpsters are. We can make it back to the garage from there.”

to be loved by neil josten is to be offered a way to evade the fbi together

“Tedious,” Neil said. “I’m trying to eat.”

my hero

Neil waited until he was done before deciding he wanted to finish his drink. Neither agent was impressed with their absolute lack of urgency,

i love u neil josten pls give me ur autograph

Neil, being the person he was, pointed at the fire hydrant adjacent to its front bumper and said, “That’s illegal, just so you know.” “Shut up and get in the car.”

i wish neil josten was real

He couldn’t fear a government who was so easily infiltrated and manipulated

FUCK THE GOVERNMENT

Neil flipped his takeout box open and started eating. “I’m allowed to visit people.”

he’s everything to me 🥰

“You’re one to accuse others of intolerable attitudes,” Browning said, and Neil only shrugged indifference.

and—for once—without any of your usual bullshit.”

- browning u love him just like the rest of us don’t lie rn

ngl i’m never getting over the fact that jean and neil are the same age like this is crazy to me nora whyd u have to do this i cant cope

“The more people I hold onto, the less of a threat I am, because I won’t want to endanger them by acting out.”

oh neil look how far uve come, i’m so proud

“Lock your door tonight if it will help, but Grayson will never bother you again.”

THANK U LORD FOR THE BRILLIANT NEIL JOSTEN HES ANSWERED MY PRAYERS U BEAUTIFUL WONDERFUL HUMAN IM SO THANKFUL FOR UR PRESENCE

all my favourite bamf! neil fics have him taking out a hit on someone for the benefit of the people he loves and i’m so glad that’s canon

i’m going fucjing crazy i didnt think it was possible to love neil anymore than i already do

best friends ❤️

jean tearing up and throwing away the notebooks and realising he trusts the trojans and the four of them going to eat one of cats new recipes after they waited up last midnight for him

A COOL EVENING BREEZE RAINBOWS OPEN ROADS AND FRIENDS

!!!!!

I CSNT BELIEVE ITS OVERRRRR I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS HOLY FUCK

#aftg #all for the game #tsc #tsc spoilers #the sunshine court #jean moreau #jerejean #jeremy knox #catalina alvarez #laila dermott #neil josten #david wymack #stuart hatford #nora sakavic

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