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#everyday things get worse for everyone else and I feel like I’m disappearing. dissipating
groupwest · 2 years
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Man this sucks. I am disappearing
#so my poppy had a heart attack he is in hospital and will either have to have a triple bypass surgery or more stints put in#I don’t know what to do :~(#I haven’t even seen him yet. everyone else has but I have to stay home and mind the dogs#I’m so worried so scared#and just#I can’t get anything for myself done. ever#everyday things get worse for everyone else and I feel like I’m disappearing. dissipating#like I’m invisible like I’m a ghost like my life is absolutely nothing#I can’t get diagnosed I can’t even go to the drs to get this implant taken out. my entire life means nothing and revolves around everyone’s#schedule but my own. I’m nothing#amd I know people care but not enough to offer help. even though all I do is help them. do I just exist to be used lol#like it feels like I have nothing inside of me no personality no will no autonomy. hardly even discernible feelings.#i don’t know what I want all I know is that I can give others what they want. I don’t know how to explain it it just feels so fucked up#anything I do want is impossible. I’ve given up on everything already. I don’t think I ever had a chance cuz Ive had no hope since childhood#I just want my family to help me again :~( did I use it all up? use all their caring up when I was a teenager. even tho I have nothing to sh#show for it. god I miss my mum so much#I miss my life so much#I miss every friendship I’ve wrecked and every person that’s left me behind. I rly hate myself and I rly want to change.#I just feel like such a ghost and I don’t know what to do#ok sorry lol. it’s fine#I just wish life would be kinder to us all
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comicteaparty · 5 years
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October 14th-October 20th, 2019 CTP Archive
The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from October 14th, 2019 to October 20th, 2019.  The chat focused on Lanterns of Arcadia by Beth Zyglowicz.
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RebelVampire
COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!
Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Lanterns of Arcadia by Beth Zyglowicz~! (http://www.lanternsofarcadia.com/)
You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PDT), so keep checking back for more! You have until October 20th to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!
QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite scene in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?
QUESTION 2. What exactly do you think the shadow creatures were that burst out during the explosion? How are they tied in to the magic disappearing in Arcadia, and what other mishaps might they be causing? Lastly, how can they be stopped?
snuffysam
1. My favorite scene is probably the scene where Phineas is explaining all the bad things he did to the university chairs. The cold, calculated way he describes all the horrible things he did is sickening, but fascinating. Plus, the scene helps display what a scumbag the Director is, with how he claims he knew nothing about this scandal but subtly leads the conversation along to the information he wants Phineas to spill.
2. The shadow creatures are perhaps... "anti-magical" creatures of some kind? Like instead of generating magic like some other beings do (e.g. the magic fireflies), they just endlessly absorb like a black hole. And if they completely absorb a being, their memory is erased from the world? Not sure what that has to do with turning Peggy into a wolf though. Perhaps the anti-magic ghosts can release the magic they absorb and cause mischief that way? (alternatively... Peggy has always been part wolf, and it's just the lack of magic that's keeping her from hiding her true form)
RebelVampire
QUESTION 3. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?
QUESTION 4. Who do you think changed the Library’s pledge in Arcadia and for what reason? Is it simply discrimination, or is something else going on? In general, what do you think is the cause in Arcadia’s general hostility towards non-humans?
RebelVampire
QUESTION 5. What has been your favorite illustration in the comic so far? What specifically about it do you like?
QUESTION 6. Do you think the other shards are in danger, or will magic naturally return to normal? In what way do you think the council at the Hub will play a role in the events going forward?
SpaceTurtleArt
Author here! I'm very excited to see people's answers to these, they're all great questions. :D
Also if you have questions for me, please feel free to ask, I will do my best to answer as long as it's not spoilery.
RebelVampire
@snuffysam I really like that scene as well, even if it made me feel flabberghasted with just how non-chalant Phineas is about everything.
1) My favorite scene is probably the one after the board decides how to punish Phineas, where Avani's sponsor is throwing shade at the Director. I really kind of like how cut-throat the scene was an disconnected from how the students might be hurt. Instead, it was just all politics at that point, and it was kind of nice to see that sort of pettiness reflected. Since office politics really are a thing and makes people just as petty as you see in that scene. 2) I have to agree with @snuffysam on this. They scream anti-magic or at least things that eat magic up wherever they do go. I imagine this goes beyond just taking magic away but also extends to warping the intended function of magic. Like magic is operating with a wheel that's missing some spokes now. As for how they can be stopped, I imagine that's gonna involve creating another artificial ley line and banishing them back to where they came from. However, that will be harder than it sounds since you'd have to do it in a way that doesn't produce more of them. Alternatively, it could be they'll dissipate on their own naturally if they're just wrangled and cut off from all sources of magic. Basically starve 'em out.
3) My favorite character is Phineas. This is one of those instances where I love the villain. Like he's just...he's just so villainous. No remorse, even when caught red-handed. I can't help but appreciate that sort of ruthlessness. However, he does have that nice balance where there's a twinge of sympathy. Cause you gotta wonder how much of this twisted personality was caused by spending too much time with dear old uncle. 4) I feel like it was the Director or the Director's evil predecessor who changed the pledge. I think discrimination is involved in the reason, although I don't feel that's all of it. Cause this seems more like the sort of thing you'd do to create a legal loophole. So when you do get caught, you can say "ah ah ah, read the fine print there." So it could've been more that they wanted a way out should the worse come to pass. As for the general hostility, it's probably just from non-contact. People fear what they don't understand. So if they aren't getting an opportunity to interact with those who aren't human, of course resentment, bad rumors, and etc. will crop up. As, unfortunately, people tend to judge groups by the worst people of those groups, since people listen to more bad news than they do good news.
RebelVampire
5) I gotta go with the obvious of one of the opening pages, namely this one: http://www.lanternsofarcadia.com/comics/10/ I super duper love the composition as well as the color contrasts. I also like the shadow-y figure foreground as well and that they're so close to the bottom of the frame. It makes them feel so small and really overall expresses the direness of the situation and that there is nothing in their human powers that they can do at the moment. 6) I do think the other shards are in danger. And that while I don't think things will escalate super fast, I feel that if the issue isn't contained, the magic eaters will spread until there is no magic left. Granted, it is questionable if eating all magic means ambient magic can't return at some point. I think the council is gonna be feeding Avani and Guardian some pretty essential knowledge down the line and that the two teams will have to work together in order to solve the crisis. Cause even if they can find a way to contact each other, I feel there will be other difficulties with the council being able to act in person in Arcadia.
RebelVampire
QUESTION 7. Which characters do you enjoy seeing interact the most? What about their dynamic interests you?
QUESTION 8. Why do you think Avani’s grandfather burned research and hid information he had about artificial ley points? How does this tie into current events? Ultimately, do you think artificial ley points can actually be made safely?
RebelVampire
QUESTION 9. What sorts of art or story details have you noticed in the way the comic is crafted that you think deserves attention?
QUESTION 10. Why do you think Silas Kane was having his nephew continue research into ley points? What other information do you think he knows, and can he be stopped? Lastly, what might he have to do with other creatures disappearing in Arcadia (if anything)?
RebelVampire
7) I enjoy seeing Phineas and his uncle interact the most I think. I like this dynamic where even though Phineas is a jerk and pretty evil, you can tell his uncle is far more so. So there's this interesting dynamic where it's hard to tell how much of Phineas' personality might be different if not for his uncles influence. So to me that kind of makes all their interactions an interesting exploration of character degradation as it were. 8) Consider the director mentioned that he'd seen the shadow creatures before, I think Avani's grandfather did the exact same experiment and had the exact same results on a smaller scale. Thus noped out of, ya know, destroying the world. I mean all the pieces fit so well to make that answer seem the most likely to me. As for whether an artificial ley point can be made safely. I want to say the answer is yes, but it's a question of should you and becomes ethics. Like for example, take our world. Arguably the advances we've made our amazing. I mean here I sit, at my computer, talking to people on the other side of the earth like it's no big deal, sipping my water I don't have to worry if it's fresh or not. But all these advances have come at a cost to nature. And I kind of think ley lines fall into the same category. Where maybe you could, but is the cost of doing it worth it?
9) I've really liked the consistency of the unique words. For instance, the other sorts of areas as shards etc. Like it's not so foreign it's hard to kind of grasp what they mean by shards, but at the same time it's just got the right amount of weight and difference to add that nice in-depth fantasy feel to the world and make it feel unique. 10) I think Kane is just the type to be obsessed with progress. Like the sort of man who 100% believes the ends justifies the means. So if he has to kill half the population to advance science, then so be it. However, as director, he obviously needs to maintain his position to have access to the resources for experiments. Hence why you delegate to minions. At the very least, I think he knows 100% the consequences of what his experiments are and how to replicate at least some of the old research into ley points. But as for can he be stopped? Sure. Of course. He's not some immortal or something as far as I can tell. It's just a matter of will everyone wise up quick enough to his antics. As for the creatures disappearing, again, I definitely think it's him and it's for the sake of progress all living creatures be damned.
RebelVampire
QUESTION 11. What do you think are this particular comic’s strengths? What do you think makes this comic unique? Please elaborate.
QUESTION 12. What role do you think Isaac will have within the story given his previous involvement in the ley point experiments? Additionally, how is it that Isaac can’t seem to remember the name of his friend who died?
snuffysam
I feel like an artificial ley point can be made safely without harming nature, but... capturing magical creatures probably isn't the way to do it? Like I feel like the lesson of the story is building up to a "harmony with nature" thing, and that a new ley point can only be made by respecting all beings.
This comic's greatest strength is absolutely its worldbuilding. Like we haven't even visited many shards yet, but I can tell just from the way the world has been established that each one will be its own unique and diverse area. And that really excites me for when we do get to visit another one.
RebelVampire
QUESTION 13. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?
QUESTION 14. What do you think will happen to Avani and Guardian once they reach Morning Glory’s place? Will Guardian be able to make a report? Further, what do you think Avani will decide to do regarding the situation in Arcadia?
RebelVampire
11) For me. the comic's main strength is the balance between fantasy and science in the world-building. I love fantasy, I really do. But sometimes the genre treats the idea of science like it's the plague and creatures don't progress. This comic has struck a great balance where sure, magic exists. But theres also ppl researching magic like they would any energy source. And I like seeing the theme of progress thrown in, as it feels like the world can grow and change just as much as the chatacters. 12) Isaac is definitely gonna be the one who tells the good guys more specifically what Phineas was doing. And I think he'll provide a much needed eyewitness account for deciding what to do. Third, I think just in general, he's gonna do all he can to set things right out of guilt. As for the memory issues, perhaps the shadow things are eating more than just magic but also the connection to magic. And that every creature is reliant on this connection. So as it erodes the connection, people forget things they were once connected with.
RebelVampire
13) I am looking forward to seeing more Phineas and for when his uncle inevitably screws him over. That's gonna be some delicious, horrifying drama that will really send Phineas in a different direction (though whether that direction is good or bad who can say). 14) I think Avani and Guardian are gonna discover they still can't make a report and dive head first into research and trying to learn all they can about ambient magic. And start trying to piece together how they can bring magic back. I think overall, though, Avani will endeavor to do all she can for Arcadia. Cause honestly, given it was her grandfather's research at the heart of this, I think she's gonna feel some familial duty to make it her responsibility to fix. At the very least, she's gonna see it through far enough to help Guardian call the proper authorities.
RebelVampire
COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!
Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Lanterns of Arcadia this week! Please also give a special thank you to Beth Zyglowicz for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Lanterns of Arcadia, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!
Read and Comment: http://www.lanternsofarcadia.com/
Beth’s Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/no-en/shop/SpaceTurtleStudios
Beth’s Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/S6S169VT
Beth’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/spaceturtleart?lang=en
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