#every time I bring up this unofficial tumblr celebration I’m gonna add more words to the name
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Love how my choosing to see a therapist coincides with the 10 year anniversary commemorative Stucky mass hysteria event, that’s fun
#every time I bring up this unofficial tumblr celebration I’m gonna add more words to the name#ASIDE from my wanting to fuck the arm (which I’m not gonna bring up to my counselor lmao it’s irrelevant)#she was telling me: oh wow yeah that’s actually brave to strike out on your own and end up with your very own apartment & stable job etc.#I don’t see it that way??????? I don’t consider it particularly brave or tenacious it’s an obligation and I did what I needed to 💁🏻♀️#and I brought up how I don’t consider myself a person more just a useful tool/someone else’s means to an end#it feels weird to do anything solely for me that’s more significant than getting something tasty to eat#also after our session I felt physically drained and emotionally wrecked for the rest of the day (a good 6 ish hours)#not even weirdly calm and empty just kind of lost and wrecked#I’ll have to tell her next time I don’t enjoy others pointing out when I’m crying#that didn’t really help my overall state#so in case there were any doubts about why I cleave to the Winter Soldier character like a limpet#oh I also said the word ‘nascent’ a bunch because I speak very precisely#no designated tag for all this just yet; we might get there so I have a chronicle#of my assorted feelings to look back on#rant in tags#personal
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