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tearsofgrace · 3 years

Text

slippery slope

written for destiel december 2020 day 4: sledding

i hate myself for writing fluff

wc: 2.1k, tags: fluff, cute shit, literally there’s like zero sad how did i do this, family bonding, christmas fluff, first kiss

also on archive

Dean blew hot air onto his hands and rubbed them together before pulling on his gloves. The sun hung heavy in the sky, its harsh rays glinting off the snow straight into his eyes.

When he popped Baby’s trunk, he couldn’t help but roll his eyes at the contents. Sam and Jack really knew no end to their family Christmas activities. It wasn’t like he was really mad, of course. This was the first Christmas they were really together, the first Christmas with no Chuck, no world-ending crisis, and if they wanted to do corny shit like sledding, then he was all in.

He grunted as he pulled the two sleds out from the trunk and handed them to Cas. When Cas’ hands wrapped around them, Dean frowned at his bare fingers.

“Aren’t your hands cold?”

“A little. I’m okay,” Cas said, meeting his eyes with a soft smile.

“I told you to bring gloves.”

Cas huffed and rolled his eyes, an action that he seemed to use at every opportunity now that he was human. “Dean-” he started. But Dean was already pulling the gloves from his fingers and holding them out to Cas.

“Here.”

“You don’t need to-” Cas trailed off as Sam and Jack walked up holding two mugs of steaming hot chocolate. He took the gloves after a look from Dean and pulled them over his bright red hands.

“Thank you.”

“We just got two, we figured we could share,” Sam said, passing his hot chocolate to Dean.

Dean took a sip, letting the liquid warm his core. There was almost no one here, just a couple families with smaller kids. He passed the cup to Cas, trading him for the sleds, and turned toward the hill.

“Let’s get this over with,” he said gruffly. But when he glanced back at Jack, saw his eyes lit up as they took in the snow-covered slope, he couldn’t stop from breaking into a grin.

“Have you been sledding before?” Jack asked as they walked across the parking lot.

“Once,” Sam said.

“Oh, man, I’d forgotten about that story,” Dean laughed.

“What story?” Cas and Jack said in unison.

Sam looked back at him and smiled, his eyes far away. “I think I was 13, or 14? Dad was on a case in,” he paused, frowning, “Where was it, Dean? Colorado, right?”

“Wyoming.”

“Right, Wyoming. So anyway, Dad was off hunting and Dean and I were holed up in this motel room with nothing to do. It was right during winter break, too, so we didn’t even have school to occupy ourselves. Dean gets me up at the ass-crack of dawn and drags me out to this car he had hotwired just so we could have a day outside the motel. We drove for like, ten hours-”

“It was an hour, max” Dean cut in. They had reached the top of the hill now, and they were standing in a circle, eyes fixed on Sam. Dean’s arms had started to ache from holding the sleds, and he let them rest on the ground.

“Whatever.” As Sam went on, Dean let his eyes drift up to Cas. He was watching Sam with a blank expression save for the mirth dancing in his eyes. His cheeks were slightly pink from the cold, and Dean allowed himself to stare a second longer before turning his attention back to Sam.

“We stopped at this little roadside stand and got hot chocolate. Dean tried to make me think it was magical or some shit. Then we got to this giant hill. I mean,” he gestured to the steep hill behind him, “This thing has nothing on it. It was freezing, too, so the snow was almost ice. We pull up to the hill, and Dean pops the trunk, and in it there’s just these two,” Sam starts laughing then, and after a minute, Dean joins him. There’s a sadness behind it, too though. And acknowledgement of how fucked up that situation really had been. “These two trash can lids.”

“I lifted ‘em off the motel manager. He almost caught me, too,” Dean said as Cas and Jack started to laugh.

“So we go to the hill, the sun is finally starting to rise, but everything is still freezing. Dean sits on the lid cross-legged and since he was my idiot older brother, I followed him. He pushed us both down the hill. It was basically solid ice, and we were on metal trash can lids.”

Cas and Jack were staring at him with wide eyes, holding back laughter.

“Yeah,” Dean cut in. “It was bad. We flew down that hill so damn fast… and when we hit the bottom we both went flying. Hurt like a son of a bitch. We were all bruised up. Dad got back and thought we’d hunted something by ourselves,” Dean snorted. “Wasn’t my best idea.”

“I thought it was worth it,” Sam said, meeting his brother’s eyes. Unspoken words passed between them. Childhood trauma wrapped in brief moments of relief. “Man, I remembered that every single Christmas. Always wanted to go again.”

“Well,” Jack said suddenly, and they all turned their attention to him. “I don’t want this to be like that.”

Dean clapped him on the shoulder and passed him one of the sleds. They were huge, meant for two people. The underneath was slick, primed for speed. Sam had wanted more basic ones, but Dean had insisted. If they were doing this stupid Christmas thing, they were at least doing it right.

“Okay, which of you is going on the winning sled?” Dean asked playfully, taking the now empty hot chocolate cup he had shared with Cas and tucking it into the bag he’d brought. Sam handed him the other one and Dean shoved it in too before looking up as Jack spoke.

“It’s a race?” Jack said, tilting his head in a way that was so Cas it hurt.

“I’ll go with you,” Cas sighed, his eyes fixed on Dean.

Dean gulped as their eyes met, and not for the first time today he wanted to reach out and take his hand. Instead he let his eyes turn to Sam and Jack, issuing a challenge. “You guys are going down.”

Sam rolled his eyes but helped Jack onto the sled before getting on himself.

“Do you want to sit in front?” Cas asked. His eyes were downcast and there was a small blush rising in his cheeks and Dean realized that holy shit his entire body was about to be pressed against Cas.

“Yeah,” he said, trying to keep the tightness from his voice. “The front is great for me.”

Wow, Winchester, that sounded totally normal.

Sam was smirking at him from the sled and he considered flipping him off. But that would just show there was something to be mad about. Which there wasn’t.

Dean got on the sled and looked anywhere but at his brother and kid while Cas climbed on behind him. Cas pulled his knees to his chest, almost not touching Dean at all.

“You’re gonna fall off if you sit like that, man.” He cleared his throat again, pointedly not looking at Sam, and reached for Cas’ legs. “You gotta wrap ‘em around up to the front like this.”

Cas just stared at him as he moved his legs, his eyes wide. Or maybe that was just Dean’s imagination. Maybe Dean just wanted Cas’ heart to be beating as fast in his chest as his was.

With Cas pressed up against him and his cheeks flaming red, he finally looked over at Sam and Jack. Sam’s smirk hadn’t faded, and Jack was watching them with a pleasant smile.

“You ready to lose?” Dean said, his voice a little too high to convey any real bravado.

“Only if you are, jerk.”

“Bitch,” Dean said automatically.

Jack counted them off with a ready, set, go, and before he knew it, the sled was slipping over the edge and hurtling down the hill.

Cas made a soft sound of surprise and Dean immediately felt arms wrap around his stomach as Cas’ face pressed into his shoulder. He looked straight ahead, letting the wind whip through his face and sting his eyes. But his heart moved from frantically pounding in his chest to leaping into his throat.

Cas’ weight was warm and steady behind him, and Dean let himself relax even as his adrenaline spiked.

Sam and Jack were somewhere ahead of them, already sliding to a stop at the bottom of the hill. He felt like it had been minutes, sitting here with Cas wrapped around him. In reality, it couldn’t have been more than twenty seconds.

Dean’s eyes widened as he looked ahead of them and saw a rough bump in the powdery snow, and he tried to steer away from it. It was too late. They hit it at full force and the sled was flung into the air.

For a moment, he was weightless, then he was slamming into the hard ground flat on his back, the sled bouncing somewhere to the side and Cas… well, Cas landed right on top of him.

He blinked away the daze and looked into Cas’ eyes, their chests pressed together by some trick of whatever gods still existed.

Cas just stared at him, unmoving. His lips were so close, breaths falling hot against Dean’s already warm face. Cas’ whole weight was pressed against him, and it should have hurt. Hell, his head was still pounding from hitting the ground at full force. But despite all that, he just felt safe.

“Cas,” he breathed out.

Cas’ blank face slowly melted into a smile and he stared into Dean’s eyes, almost as though he was searching his soul. “Hello, Dean.”

Everything was warm and safe and bright and nothing else seemed to matter. He couldn’t remember why he and Cas didn’t normally get this close. It was some distant warning voice in his head, but the voice was too far away.

All he could see, all he could think, all he could breathe in, it was just Cas.

And he wanted more.

He lifted himself up slightly and let his lips brush against Cas’. Cas tensed above him, but almost immediately he relaxed into Dean, pressing them closer together and letting their lips move in sync.

Dean sighed in content and let his hands wander up from the snow to wrap around Cas and pull him toward the ground. Why they hadn’t been doing this all along, he had no idea. Cas was everything. Cas meant everything. So why couldn’t he and Cas have everything?

It took him a second to hear the cheering, and as soon as he did, all the old fears returned. A blush rose to his face and he pulled back from Cas at the same time that he pushed off Dean and stumbled to his feet.

Sam walked over and reached down a hand to help Dean to his feet. Dean took it, keeping his eyes down and trying to ignore how hot his face had gotten.

“Well,” Sam started as Jack joined them. “I think technically Jack and I won the race, but this definitely tops that.” He clapped Dean on the back and Dean finally raised his eyes.

“It does,” Jack agreed solemnly.

Dean ignored the fear seeping through him and shrugged, hoping he looked more casual than he felt. Then he turned to Cas and took his hand before he could change his mind. The gloves he had lent Cas were rough against his hand, but underneath the weight and pressure was grounding, safe.

He looked at Cas and grinned, his heart beating erratically when Cas smiled back.

“Yeah, sorry, Sammy,” he gave Cas’ hand a short squeeze. “Cas and I have got you beat.”

Sam snorted and met Dean’s eyes. Beyond the teasing, the laughter on Sam’s face, Dean saw something else. Pride. His brother looked so goddamn proud of him it hurt. Dean felt something inside him stir and he held back the tears that stung in his eyes.

He looked back at Cas and found him staring at him with an expression of joy and confusion and wonder and just about every other emotion that was running through Dean right now. But that didn’t matter. They would have time to sort out whatever this was between them. They would have time for long talks and heart-to-hearts and whispered confessions. For now, they were good. All of them were good.

Dean took a deep breath in of the cold air and looked around at his family with pride.

“Anyone in for a rematch?”

****

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