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#etsy reserves
indiesellersguild · 9 months
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Etsy is using Payment Reserves to stiff their handmade sellers - refusing to pay most of what they're owed until after they create and ship their orders.
Our petition is online, please sign and share!
Etsy: Pay your makers NOW!
In the example (an actual order from a seller on reserve), the buyer paid $33.87, but the seller only received $2.72. It didn't even cover shipping costs.
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5eyed · 2 years
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new stickers up for sale! theyre based on fortune cookie messages which im obsessed with. 
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theelizabethjoy · 10 months
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If you have talked to me or seen any social media posts from me in the last year then you have heard of Artisans Cooperative. We started last year with the #EtsyStrike coming together because we knew there was a better way. In May of 2023 we started our Capital compaign; in 2 months we have gained 133 members, 300 email subscribers, and $33k. Our goal initially was 100 members, 800 email subscribers, and $25k but seeing how excited people were to join us we made some stretch goals AND WE ARE ALMOST THERE! We have 7 days left of our capital campaign, 7 days to get another 500 email subscribers, and another $17k.
Here's why you should join: first and foremost as a member you will receive dividends once the co-op is making money, second members help make decisions within the co-op (1 member = 1 vote), third as a member you will have lower commission fees (founding members: 6.5%, members, members: 8%, non-members: 9.5%) for the first two years. There are NO listing fees, NO monthly fee: just the membership buy-in and the commission rate.
In order to make this goal I need your help! If you can't join, donate, if you can't donate then share this post.
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climbdraws · 1 year
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not etsy putting a reserve on my account cause of high sales 😭😭😭😭
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theamazingannie · 7 months
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Was all excited about potential costumes to wear to the film tonight when it was announced and now that it’s here I’m realizing I did not prepare at all and now have no idea what to wear
#i leave in two hours what am I doing#Im about to just wear an Etsy TS shirt and sweatpants#i want to combine all the eras but I don’t have stuff for every era and I don’t wanna leave anyone out#because Im autistic and non living non physical concepts have feelings#i also Wanna be more subtle because it’s in a normal place rather than a stadium reserved for this purpose#was just gonna do rep cuz it’s my favorite aesthetic era as a swemo but I also Wanna wear my red scarf#and i didn’t get to wear my mirror all earrings to the concert cuz I lost them so even tho I love my snake earrings I wore#i Wanna wear them#and If Im wearing three eras I might as well wear them all#i use a flannel as my cold weather pre winter jacket so that’s evermore#and then i got a 1989 era vibe skirt#and a karma tshirt#but then i dont really have anything got debut fearless and lover#aside from my nail polish and face jewels if I decide to wear them which I probably will#i got so much rep and a lot of midnights and red#but the other eras i either have one thing that I need to wear#or nothing at all#i got lover earrings but then I’d have to skip folklore and wearing two different earrings looks too weird#i got these brown tights I can wear that give off a kind of fearless vibe even tho fearless is more yellow but tv has a lot of brown#Im way overthinking this no one will care what I’m wearing lol#i think I’m just gonna go with my simple as many eras as possible outfit choice#and just vibe
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moodr1ng · 2 years
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im sure "my stickers sell well on etsy" is not all things considered a great accomplishment in ones life but honestly considering how much i struggle w completing tasks and how i cannot hold a job and usually struggle to find any even semi-professional activity i can hold long-term without getting super anxious or just failing to get it off the ground.. the stickers are honestly making me feel so much more capable and accomplished
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nxcromantik · 1 year
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i didn't want to take any commissions until after i finish uni bc i'm always so busy it takes me forever to get through them.. but i finished all my 2022 comms and my etsy is STILL in reserve so i might open some slots..
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monriatitans · 9 months
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Etsy: We Respectfully Request CHANGE 🟠 #KeepEtsyHuman
This is a call to action, for those who are ready for change on Etsy. For better customer support, transparency about the payment reserve system, and rampant wrongful suspensions and listing deactivation. ↓ OPEN FOR FREE ETSY RESOURCES ↓ 📺 MENTIONED IN THIS VIDEO 📺 🟠 Recent Updates to Etsy’s Payment Reserve policy: https://community.etsy.com/t5/Announc… ☕ Join us for a live chat this Friday:…
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cindylouwho-2 · 11 months
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Hi Cindy, I have never heard of putting a shop on Payment reserve. Can you define that for us? Thanks so much for all that you do.
You are welcome!
My blog post pretty much covers everything about Etsy payment reserves:
I hope that helps!
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insanemommy2021 · 1 year
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cynefincrafts-blog · 2 years
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Fancy Something? Drop me a message and I'll reserve until the end of the month /pay day. 💖 #ETSY #customers #helping #payday #month #gifts #orders #reserve #handmade #handmadeinwales # (at North Wales) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cdl4KMssRjV/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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indiesellersguild · 6 months
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URGENT!
The ISG received a report that possibly thousands of sellers had their Etsy shops closed down this week. Concerningly, many of them seem to be sellers that also spoke out against the Etsy reserve policy this summer.
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If Etsy just suspended your shop, please fill out our form to help us get a better picture of what is going on.
Then please share it and reblog! The more data we have the more effectively we can fight back!
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pedge-page · 2 months
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Plushies 6 - MooMoo
Joel Miller x F!Reader
Plushies Series Masterlist but Can be read as standalone
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Summary: you surprise Joel for your 2 year anniversary by being the fuckable plushie tonight.
Warnings: literally 99.9% smut. Unprotected sex (she is on the pill but they’re playing with the idea of it failing), BREEDING KINK, pregnancy kink, plushie milk sucking (? You’ll see); nipple pumps, nipple play, nipple orgasm, boobjob, oral m-receiving, squirting, cream pie, belly bulge, no breastfeeding but Joel has a breastfeeding kink (obviously!), Daddy kink, spitting, bimbofication, lots of cow talk, praises you and degrades you, cringe ass language overall for these horny fucks
18+ ONLY
- - - -
It's getting pretty bad now that every time you see your pile of plushies in the room, your panties dampen. And you can’t really avoid them because Joel’s been adding to the mountain of stuffed animals with every excuse to get you a gift.
And then outright making you cum on them before he’s ripped the tag off.
You suspect Joel also gets equally as hard by them too, with all the interesting things he’s been sharing since starting your Plushie-sex journey. He’s pretty quiet and reserved any other time, even during regular sex. But when all your little beady stuffed animals start getting involved…
You’re startled by a gentle knock at the door. “You okay in there, sweet pea?” 
“Mhm! I’m almost ready!”
You both just got back from a fabulous date—ready to seal the night with passionate sex. And you’ve planned the perfect 2 year anniversary gift for him.
You stare in the mirror in your new “outfit” to surprise Joel’s loins: naked, save for a spotted felt ear headband, a leather collar with a big golden bell dangling from your neck, knee high white and black spotted stockings, and a slutty garter body harness speckled in black splotches. The straps dip and curve over your hips with cute ribbons on the waist, snaking under your soft parts, accentuating your breasts, tummy, thighs, ass—everything that Joel finds bitable. 
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^photos + product by GlamourIsTheEndGame on Etsy
When you finally walk out into the bedroom with all the might your tiny little harness could muster, Joel’s eyes finally land on you. You smile at him with a sultry, pretty, and far from innocent smile.
"I was thinking maybe I could be your plushie for tonight,” you say, pushing your breasts out with your arms drawn tight, and shaking a little so he can see them sway and hear the jingle of the bell bounce over your collarbone.
Ok, so you know the scenes in Tom&Jerry where Tom sees a female cat, and his eyes bug out cartoonishly and jaw falls down to the ground?
Yeah, that’s Joel right now.
His jaw is so slacked it might unhinge itself. Eyes straining because they can’t go any fucking wider, and his pupils literally so blackened, you wouldn’t know he had baby brown eyes.  
You’re standing there very expectedly, waiting.
Waiting.
… waiting.
Say something you kinky bastard, damnit NowILookLikeAFool—!
Your nerves are starting to curl in on themselves...maybe you don’t look as sexy as you’d hoped...
“Um…if… if you don’t like it—I mean if you wanted to pick up a stuffie instead…”
The man takes advantage of your brief embarrassment and jumps you, shoving you against the wall and caging your legs around his hips.
“Oh!”
You whimper as the unmistakable bulge of his package presses hungrily, slipping past the little string and nudging your wet clit.
He glues his lips to yours, devouring your tongue. It’s extra hungry, extra needy tonight than usual. His lips twitch with the rumbling growl reverberating deep in his chest. 
“You’re so fucking sexy holy fucking shit baby-jesusssssss look at you— fuckfuckfuck I’m so lucky, luckylucky bastard—FUCK ME—you’re mine? You’re actually fucking mine????”
You giggle, confidence surging again as his hands struggling to grab every bit of you all at once. Holding you captive nonetheless, eyes raking over in wonder and astonishment.
“I’m all yours, Daddy,” you hum sensually. You grab his hands and bring them to curl along your harness, under the straps to feel your skin all hot and tingly. Begging for his touch.
“Happy fucking Anniversary to me.”
Joel scoops you up and sits on the bed, immediately having you straddle him. You grind down on his tent poking up between your cheeks. His fingers dig into your thighs when he feels the flutter of your folds.
He knows you feel as sexy as you look. 
“Gonna be my cow slut tonight, huh? You know what good little cow sluts do?”
“Suck cock?” You ask cheekily, preparing to sink down to your knees to pleasure him with your mouth.
He lets out a happy sigh. You’re ready to move, your teeth sucking in your lower lip, but he stops you, instead choosing to pin you closer to his body. His voice drops an octave:
“They birth and they milk.”
They—what? “Um—come again?”
“Breeding, baby. That’s what we’re doing tonight.”
He knows you’re on the pill, so it’s not like you’re really trying to get pregnant…but the thought of getting knocked up tonight sends a particularly dangerous chill down your spine. He never uses a condom so the chances are still….there. Every night. Each time he blows his fat load deep inside you; like a good little cumdump, he says. 
Why not indulge his fantasy tonight?
“You wanna breed me, Daddy?” You tease, hips swaying along his clothed member, dancing along your slit.
“Mmmm, yeahhh. Shit, baby. You’d look so good pregnant. And these—“ he grits his teeth, fingers pinching the straps that circle your mounds, watching them squish together, “—Are gonna fill up with so much milk, gonna feed me with your delicious cunt and sweet milk 24/7.”
You want to slap the smug look off his face, but now’s not the time. It’s time to get those pouty lips on your breasts and the cock in your cunny.
“Better start getting them open so I can satisfy that big thirst of yours.”
On cue, his lips wrap around your nipples, kneading your tits in his big rough hands. You start bouncing steadily along his cock. He’s domineering and digging into your skin harshly, teeth overly excited and sinking into your pebbled nips while he grinds up against your heat.
He’s biting and sucking so hard, asking-PLEADING-for your milk.
Milk that is definitely not there!
"Ouch! Joel I'm not going to give you milk, we’re just—playing—I’m not actually pregnant!"
But the THOUGHT of you exactly like this but stuffed full of a baby, just imagining your tits all round and belly bursting, the garter harness pulling tight against your skin and your tits poking out with that big heavy swell of your tummy making you look like his own breeding stock.
Desperate whines rush out of his mouth in a string of babbling: “I can get ya pregnant, please? Pleasepleaseplease darling let me put a baby in you— breed ya so good, just look at ya, could get ya knocked up, just think how cute you'd look gettin' all round with my calves grown in that tumtum. Fuck! what a sight, showing off to everyone our hard work breeding, evidence of our love making, and these titties would just swell n get all heavy with all the creamy delicious milk ya could give me like the best momma n—“
Your palm splats against his mouth to shut him up. “Slow down, cowboy. We aren’t having a real baby any time soon. We don't even live together yet..."
"Then move in with me,” he proposes without hesitation.
You …blink for a moment. His mouth hovers over your breast again but you drag him up to look you in the eyes—so you know he's not just fucking around.
“Really?"
"Yes! Why the fuck do we still have separate homes? I'm here all the time anyway. Plus, takin' care of all those plushie pets must be exhausting on your own, they're partially my kids anyway so.”
"You really want to live together?"
"Yeah. Yeah I do.” 
You and Joel were a ‘take it one day at a time’ trusting kind of love, but right now as you stare into his heart-shaped eyes, you can see your whole future together. The kind of earth shattering reality that’s never been more clear and more desirable than this moment. 
“I—“
“Don’t gotta give me an answer right now. Wanna ask ya again when we’re—less horny. So you know I’m bein’ serious.”
You grin and kiss him.
“Show me a good anniversary night and I’ll give a good thought-over.”
“Oh babygirl,” he tuts. “Think you were gonna be the only one showin’ me a good time? I got ya something too, sweetheart. Gonna go perfect with ya cow slut theme ya got goin’ on.”
You don’t know what he could possibly have that could “match” your very specific cow themed sex outfit—
Unless its more cows.
So when he sits you on the bed, stumbling over his shoes because he can’t take his eyes off you, Joel equally surprises you with a box of cow themed gifts—little calf beanie babies, which are conveniently jerry-rigged to two separate nipple pumps with their little snouts pointing towards the  suction cups, and a cow plush toy that has a compartment in the top to pour milk in, complete with rubber “practice” utters for farmer kids to learn milking.
“I swear, I had no idea you were gonna be dressed as slutty cow momma for me. I just—saw this shit online and thought my girl needed to be drinking some cow titties when I fuck her swollen cow tits.”
“We’re so in sync,” you muse, shaking your head with an amused smirk. 
Its honestly should be... kinda concerning.
He sits back next to you on the mattress, shoving some of your animals off the edge. You instinctively crawl atop his thighs again, and his hands settle once more protectively around your waist. You stare down at him, his sinful lips practically begging to get sucked while that lidded lustful gaze lulls you in a trance. The Joel Miller spell is wordlessly working on you again—and you know you’re gonna be cracking and doing anything this man says within a few shorts minutes.
You beam at each other tenderly, unable to help the genuine happy crinkle at your lips as you kiss him softly.
Then it starts:
"Can ya moo for me?"
You roll your eyes. Not quite doing anything he says so soon.  “Fuck no I'm not doin that shit again for you. You want a farm, go get one yourself."
"Please Angel?" He plants wet kisses along your jaw before giving two fat ones on top of your breasts.
"Still no."
He groans, but continues to nip at your breasts like a scolded child. "Can I fuck your big mommy milkin' cow titties?”
“There is no milk!” You snap. You’re ready to throw the whole idea away, but his persistent hold around your waist and cock nudging your throbbing puss is making it difficult to resist him for long.
His big brown chocolate lab eyes bleed into your horny little soul. “C’mon, MooMoo, for Daddy?” 
“I am NOT your MooMoo—“
He jingles the bell dangling from your neck. “Ya’sure sound like my MooMoo.”
you clench your fist around his shirt and take a deep breath. "Fine, Fine! Whatever."
"Say it."
"You can—ugh—fuck my big... mommy milking cow titties." You face feels so hot with embarrassment, but Joel purrs with such satisfaction that you feel even WORSE how much you don't hate it. 
Since when did the double entendre of being called his "kitty" and "puppy" when Joel fucks you and your animal themed plushies become his "moo moo girl"?
He grins with such a dirty, perverted look about him. Continues to kiss over your mounds, massaging the muscles in your back so you don’t notice when he bends over you to grab his homemade breast pumps.
He looks at you sideways with expectant hope in his eyes. 
You roll your eyes again. Of course he can’t just get a normal titjob and blow his load in your mouth. There’s always some fucking thing else you gotta do. But with the way his cock pulses under your drooping pussy, you decisively snatch it from his hands and get to work just so that he’ll call you his slutty cow again. 
“That’s my girl,” he groans, rubbing along your hips excitedly. He holds them in your hand and exhales hot air over the cups so they aren’t cold against your skin.
The clear tubes are narrow, obviously meant to resemble that of utters rather than actually breastfeeding from a bottle. You stick them on each tit, and very quickly Joel is pumping the little hand squeeze that starts to suction the small space of air into the connecting wire.
You gasp at the sensation. Slowing latching on, the small of your breasts are pointing inward towards the pumps, sticking up on their own now as Joel continues to suck the air out. 
You hiss a strangled moan. The sensation isn’t—bad. It’s like an invisible hand is dry vacuuming your pebbles.
“Fuck—fuck look at that,” he growls. “Your nipples are sooooooooooo fucking suckable right now.”
You look down and see their hardened state reaching out into nothing. As more of your flesh and tissue gets sucked in, pressing tightly, trying to fill the small space, the pain mixes with pleasure. Joel’s continually nipping at your chest with lidded eyes glued to the scene helps spread the multiple sensations your body is feeling.
“There’s not gonna be any milk,” you warn again, shifting uncomfortably in his lap. Your breath hitches in your throat when you get to a particularly suffocating phase of tightness in your breast.
He casts a sorrowful grin before yanking the pumps off together with a loud SCHMOP.
You screech unexpectedly, rolls of pleasure sparking through your chest, up to your brain then right down to your tummy and cunt, your eyes rolling back as you collapse forward on to him.
You’re both quiet for a moment save for your heavy pants. Until you feel a wetness growing on his pants.
“Joel—did you—?”
He laughs out, “No baby, that was all you.”
Your cheeks go warm in embarrassment, looking down to confirm that you had actually squirted onto his jeans just from getting your nipples suctioned.
“Didn’t know ya titties were so sensitive…” he goads.
You shake your head and nudge it into his neck—because you didn’t know you could squirt just from getting your breasts suctioned either. 
“Shhh, I know. I know baby, just breathe. Little titties are so sore, but we gotta get them ready to start feeding from. S’not my fault you’re just a little slut, so hungry to be a momma—don’t you worry, Daddy Bull is gonna make it happen. Ya can squirt your little juices all you want when I breed your cunt like my own personal livestock.”
You have half the mind to tell him again there is no baby to be feeding any time soon, and you sure as heck weren’t his livestock to be bred, and had nothing to say about "Daddy Bull", but with the harsh throbbing along your nipples, dragging sensitively against his cotton shirt, you don’t care to do anything else but drool and hump your weeping clit against his soaked thighs.
 “Let Daddy see his work,” he mumbles into your throat with a kiss.
You sit up again with his assistance. 
He groans heartily at the sight of your swollen, redden tips poking from your boobs. “Jesus fuck, MooMoo.” He rubs his thumb over your mounds and you wince away. “They hurt?” He laugh sadistically.
You cover your lips with the back of your palm, unwilling to let him see your delirious heaving. Your pussy throbs desperately for more his unique torture. “You….bastard…”
He soothes over the swollenness, groping your breasts and telling you how they’ll be sore like this all the time when they start filling with milk. How he’s gonna breed you so full of calves you’ll be bursting milk on your own, and he’s gonna lap it all up to keep you happy.
You don’t know why you keep letting him put the pumps back on. He doesn’t try to rip them off like before, but keeps bringing you close with tight compresses before letting air quickly filter in again. The little cow beanies bob up and down with each deep breath you force through your nose, eyes glittering up so innocently. You’re trying to ignore the equal throb in your untouched clit as the ones in your overstimulated perky nips.
Once they’ve swelled to a level of his satisfaction…
“MooMoo…”
“Huh…”
“Time for cow titty fucking.”
He throws you down on your back in the heap of your plushies. Wasting no time pulling his stiff member out of his jeans, he pumps a few times with one hand. Like a professional Joel wraps his belt tightly around your wrists, like a cowboy expertly tying his prize calf he just lassoed in. 
You twist your legs to hide the leaking drip of slick sliding down to your ass. Your head leans to the side, arms thrown behind you so you can see him, biting your lips and furrowed brows of want, admiring his physique when he pulls his shirt off with a satisfied grin. 
“Fuck me, cowboy,” you hum, shifting your bum up  and spreading your legs so he can see your swollen slit twitching up at him.
But he throws your legs down and cages you under him. “I’m makin’ a mess of those god damn Mommy milkers first. Then your cunt gets whatever Daddy Bull has left.”
DaddyBullDaddyBullDaddyBull, you chant in over and over again your dumb little cow brain...
Oh Christ, tonight’s gonna be wild.
You watch him crawl over your body, fisting his leaking member over your chest. You want it, licking your lips in anticipation, pushing your boobs together with your arms to entice him. He twists the bell-collar so its dangling off the side of your shoulder before placing his leaking tip right at your lips, smearing his precum. Moaning at that fucking taste of Joel you’d been craving all day. You lap at the saltiness, begging him to force it deep into your mouth, but all he does is rub it over your lips, your tongue peaking out to get it nice and wet for him.
His cock falls right in the valley as you smoother it with your supple breasts. “Soft titties all mine to play with? You gonna be a good girl and let me fuck them?”
He starts thrusting, suffocating his cock between your tits. With one hand, he’s pulling the harness roped around your body tight like he's riding a God damn horse, the other still possessively pumping the nipple suction cups so they squeeze harder around your precious tits. His balls rub along your sternum while he bounces his hips, rocking back and forth again and again, making a sticky mess of his arousal and your drool all over your chest.
"Angel, imagine how fucking good this is gonna feel when these pups are filled to the brim with Daddy's milk.”
You nod dumbly. “Want you to fill them, Daddy. Want you inside,” you moan. Your head leans forward as you try to suck in his tip each time it poked through your boobs. 
Joel lets out a shaky breath, trying hard not to blow his load too soon. Though the sight of your face and cowbell all sticky with his creamy spent has him drawing away quickly, a firm grip wrapped around the base to hold his twitching balls from releasing his seed just yet. 
You cry out, tongue chasing his retreating tip. 
“You ready to be my little cocksleeve plushie tonight?” He asks, raking his nails over your chest and belly, raised red trails marking you in their leave.
“I’m ready Daddy, fuck me like your dirty whore!”
He spits a fat gob of saliva right on to your slit before rubbing it over with his thick tip. You don’t need the extra lubrication due to how drenched you are, and the sweet squirting you did earlier, but oh how he admires the way it mingles with your juices and slides down your ass.
He rips the cow patterned garter ribbon from the waist buckle and wraps it around your calves, sticking your legs straight, and pulls your ankles taught. You’re completely tied off at his mercy, like cattle being tamed. He hoists your legs straight up in the air, his bare cock grinding against your wet heat.
"D-daddy!"
He leans your straight legs against his left shoulder and peers down over you: messy lipstick, bound wrists pulled together and straight to your stomach, pushing your tits even closer,  and the harness does nothing but give each one an immaculate show of perkiness. Paired with the tight press that the pumps are still holding your nipples captive.
He decides to show you some mercy by removing the tubes. He kneads their swollen state at the same time his cock rubs along your slick folds.
“T’Thank you, Daddy Bull,” you puff.
“Good girl. Didn’t even have to remind you,” he praises with gentle strokes of your cheeks.  “Your little calf babies are full now. Time for DaddyBull to spend time with Momma.”
You hope he doesn’t see the way your stomach clenches at being called Momma—a kink you’re shelving for much much later.
He’s got such stamina to be still gliding himself along your pussy but not penetrating just yet. Your brows are scrunched together in a plea and desperation, and those little cow ears are flopped back into the mess of softness. Softness that surrounds you, that innocent feel of cute plushy fur and cotton all rubbing against your body below you despite the numbing throb in your breasts and cunt. 
He puts his fingers in your mouth. Your tongue swirls around his digits, getting them wet before he’s drooping them down your puffy lips, down your breasts each with a squeeze, trailing warmly over your belly before coming to the place where he’s about to impale you.
Your entire body is thrumming with need.
He takes the moment to see how wrecked you already are for him—and to savor your body, knowing he’s gonna breed you so good one day and everything is gonna swell, like a stamp of ownership.
“You’re so fucking breedable,” he whispers in awe of your body. You don’t think he meant to say it out loud, but it turns you on all the more to hear his inner thoughts that would most likely scare away other women.
Not you though. You shutter at the thought of it taking, of making something evident of all the fucking and cum dumping he’s been giving you.
The pornographic gasp you let out as he slides his cock over your folds, between your squished thighs. Your slick lathering his length, prepping him and teasing your clit with long strokes. You whine as his mushroom tip glistens with precum, poking through your thighs then retreating. Getting your hopes up and holding it there sadistically.
"Don't gotta do nothin' tonight for me, sweet pea. Just gotta hold on for the ride."
You're not ready when he latches at your entrance and thrusts in all at once. Your eyes roll to the back of your skull as he fills your gut with his fat cock, stretching you in the best way only Joel Miller knows.
“Ahhh--ah!—f—f—fuuuccccckkkkkkkk!”
Joel Miller does have a Bull sized cock. More evident now stretching your little hole than you’d ever truly thought before.
The position is so restraining, leaving you no way to move or adjust - just take take take take his pounding. You both groan at the sight of his tip ballooning in your lower belly with each thrust. 
He throws his arm over your straight thighs and thumbs over your swelled naval. "Fuuucccckk look at that, look at that!"
"S-ssoooooo deeeeeeppp," you wreathe, lips curling in delirium.
“Yeah-yeah babygirl, gotta stretch you—get ya ready to hold my calves huh? Gotta make room for them to pop out—“
“M—mnot—pregnant,” you rasp hoarsely, eyes closing when he starts angling his hips up and rutting along the gummy part in your cunt.
“I’ll make it happen, don’t you worry your little brain.” He laughs. “You like getting stuffed like your stuffies. Turned you into a proper fuck toy—mm—there we go—but you’re always gonna be my favorite toy to hump, to fill, to own." He forces each word out with each rut. “You’re so fucking good at being a soft whore for me to use, all precious and pretty on the outside. Just another one of these plushie sluts on this bed,” he grunts.
You stick your tongue out dreamily and smile, fingers getting lost in the scattered stuffed animals surrounding you with their soft, fluffy textures and hard or squishy bodies. 
It feels really good to have 0 thoughts and just get fucked like a cow plushie.
He kisses your ankles soothingly, almost pathetically attempting to distract you from the sudden lash of his palm slapping against your ass.
“DADDY—shit!” You whimper. He doesn’t love the way you instinctively try to squirm away from him, but with how tied up you are, continually impaled on his throbbing length, you have nowhere to go. 
He continues to spank you, the same spot, fingers splayed wide until his reddened print is left etched into your skin "Gotta brand ya baby, make sure everyone knows who owns this body.”
Lewd noises of wet skin slapping, and the little cow bell clanking on your neck fill the room along with your pathetic whimpers and Joel's repressed grunts.
"Yeah? You like daddy's bull cock ramming that tight little Moo Moo pussy?"
“Yea- ohh-f—fuck yes Bull Daddy, cock so good, fuck— nobody stretches me—ah shit!Yesyesyesyesyesyesyes—m’gonna be bred so fucking full Daddy fuck yes!”
“My little cow breedin’ bitch,” he hollers. He tears the cute little cow patterned bow from that had held your calves together and quickly parts your legs, shoving your knees up to his shoulders so you’re in full mating press. He continues thrusting aggressively downward. Despite still being bound by the wrist, your elbows part slightly enough to slot him between your arms, slinking your hands over his neck to bring him closer to you.
"Breed me!" You cry, literally cry. He doesn’t relent his rough thrusts despite cooing your tears welling.
 "Gonna take all that bull cum in your slutty womb? Gonna let me put a baby in ya?”
Your walls clench down on him harder in response. The more his thick tip nudges your cervix, the less words you’re able to string together in sentences.
He doesn’t wait for answer—doesn’t think he ever will because he’s dangerously dreamt of impregnating you for so long now, knowing he wouldn’t be able to stop the day you said yes. Never bringing it up but fuuuccckkk he can’t stop his confessions from tumbling out: “Shit baby, might take this time. Lookin like my breeding stock n shit, gonna plow ya, you'll milk my cummies in your tummies and then—"
"Jesus Joel stop your yapping and FUCKME.”
"Ya gonna moo for me?"
You're moaning more, but with the way your sockets are rolled to their whites, arching up like the exorcist as he rams himself so deep its puncturing your belly, the sound’s eliciting from your mouth coming out as "mmmmmaaaauuuuhhhhhau-huh-hhuhh-huhhhh!"
He chuckles. "Close enough.”
He grabs the moo plush and shoves its utters in your mouth. You tilt your head to the side and your tongue circles around the rubber part. He almost busts his nut at the gorgeous sight below him: your pretty lashes closed as you suckle from the utters, each little swallow of milk going sown your throat. You're so delirious and cock drunk that you don't care about the trickles of cream dribbling down the corner of your lips. Your tits swollen and red, nipples so perked up they may actually start bleeding milk if he were to play with them any more, and your breasts bounce back and forth with each thrust, the jingle of the cow bell clanking loudly with no sense of tune but with all the hymns of his fucking he can give you. He snaps the garter belt strapped around you like reins, free ruling restraints that only make every bit of you even more voluptuous. Your legs are so strong, thick yet securely plastered together by his knot.
Your brows pinch together as your orgasm builds from your belly, making you arch violently against the pillow.
You pull away from the cow to take a gasp of air. Joel sticks his finger in your mouth and swirls it around. You hum in content, letting him make a mess of your drool and leftover milk spilling out, down your chin and cheeks with his thick digits. He yanks it out and licks it clean.
"Taste so fucking goo—“
"Keep fucking me with Daddys Bull cock fuck daddy I wanna get bred so fucking much wanna be your breeding little cum slut daddy fuck yes! You're so fucking huge, splitting my little moomoo pussy in half poundbreedbreedbreed daddy want all your cummies inside!"
"Fucked ya so dumb. All that ‘no baby, no milky talk.’ Shit! Fuck I'm gonna wreck this pussy, my fucking pussy! Nobody comes inside this sweet little womb but Daddy!"
"Just you just you daddy all yours please brand me make me yours! Oh-oh fuck Daddy yes! I’m cumming , I’m cumming so hard Daddy Bull fuck yesyesysssssyesyesyes!!!” you hiss through gritted teeth.
Your mouth parts as a silent scream is let out into the air. Joel keeps fucking you through your orgasm, his pained gasps while trying to remain sane with your convulsing walls choking his cock, sucking him in so tight he wouldn’t be able to pull out if he pried himself from you. He reaches between you to rub your clit, and your head thrashes about in overstimulation. Hard teeth latch on to your collar bone as you squirt once again all over his cock, streaming to his balls and soaking the bed and poor plushies caught in the crossfire with your naughty juices.
“There’s my slutty girl! Squirt that puss everywhere, want to stain everything with that cunt, my pretty cow girl.”
Joel’s whole body ruts into you like his life depends on it. The bed lurches violently against the wall, plushies falling over the sides like an avalanche while your battered soaked pussy takes the beating of a lifetime from the man who undoubtedly has ruined you and laid claim to your soul for the rest of your life. You hold on with the little strength you have left as he readies to empty his balls into you.
“Shit—shit—oh ff-ffuck baby—Daddy Bull is cummin—gonna breed ya SHIT oh baby,baby,babbyyyy gonna flood ya, you’re gonna take it? Gonna take all that cum—not a drop—haa-left—Gonna knock you up this time-mmmf—fuck! My good cow sluuutt—Baby give it ta me so good, Breed ya full o’me!FUCK!!”
With a final slam, Joel plunges his cock balls deep and shouts into the mattress, pumping his cum as deep into your womb as it could possibly go with thick, fertile ropes flooding every inch of space inside you.
He forces out each harsh, agitated pant into your neck, sweat sticking between the two of you. Your hips are held upright, walls fluttering with each pulse of his dick still unloading inside.
“I love you,” you whisperinto his ear, mind all hazy as you stroke his damp curls. He shudders, relaxing into your embrace, and you welcome the crushing sensation of his body on top of yours.
He pulls away to admire your barely conscious state: stockings all torn up, harness now tattered and  straps broken from their belts, the cow-eared headband snapped in half. Bruises and purple markings and love bites scattered all over your skin, your breasts the most damaged and swollen. He wonders how long it will take to fully heal, and how sensitive those little nipples are going to be for the next few days. Most importantly, he can’t tear his gaze away from the beat of your pussy lips struggling to swallow all of his creamy seed. 
You gasp out when Joel pushes his cock all the way back in, his cum spilling out the sides and coating you but trapping a good amount inside, leaving it nowhere else to go.
“I Love being your cow MooMoo plushplush,” you hum, wiggling your bum and holding him close. 
“How bout this one still?” He grabs the forgotten milker toy and brings the utters between the two of your lips.
Your tongue wraps around one utter and you start suckling the sweetness. 
Joel yanks the toy away.
“Show me.”
You open your lips so he can see the pool of milk filled to the brim, spilling over the dips of your cheeks.
He dips his tongue into your mouth and begins sucking out your split-mixed milk, kissing you passionately so you’re both gulping around each other’s tongues.
Drunk. You feel drunk off him. Off the milk. 
Eventually he pulls away so you can both breathe.
“I mean it.”
You draw away momentarily, wondering. it takes a moment to process anything that the two of you talked about while his cock still twitches in your cum-filled vagina.
You laugh when it hits you. “Yes, I’ll move in with you—“
“—You’re gonna look so fucking beautiful when you’re pregnant.”
You both pause for a moment before bursting out in a fit of giggles.
“Oh, I already knew that,” you taunt.
-
After you sleep for 14 hours straight, you wake up to find your tattered costume is gone, and your body completely naked. You don’t feel as achy as you expected—thanks to Joel probably massaging you in your sleep. Your cunt and breasts, however, are puffy and bruised as hell. You’ll have to restrict sexy time from Joel to just regular, Plushie-free fucking.
Speaking of, there’s an unfamiliar little guy on your bed right under your arm right now: yet another cow plushie, but it’s sooooo much softer, a bit heavier too. You turn it over and switch the little battery pack on, and the animal begins expanding and deflating with gentle breaths, its tummy warm and comforting against your body.
Joel comes in with a cup of tea  placed on your bedside before jumping on the Plushie bed. You poke his face.
“Whaaaat!”
"Joel, you know this is for babies,” you say, gesturing to the new cow breathing cow plush.
Right my babygirl.” He smiles proudly, stroking your face.
"No, like actual babies. It’s a breathing soother to help them sleep. Did you not notice what section you were in when you bought it?”
He looks ahead at the wall for a briefly, revisiting the memory. “Ya know what, that might be why the lady asked if it was for a girl, and I said ya my girl. N’ then she asked 'how old' and I told her ya age and she gave me a weird look.”
Your eyes squeeze tight as you fall back in a fit of cackles. “You were literally in the baby section Joel."
"Ain't all these plushies for kids anyway?” He gestures to the pink, purple, frilly, soft, funny faced squish stuffed animals you have on your bed. “What’s the difference?”
You switch the heavy cow animal on again and the cow starts slowly inflating then deflating with each breath. 
He gets all amazed like the marvels of today's technology far exceed his imagination. “Holy shit it got a real heart in there! No wonder it cost me 60 bucks.”
“Pretty sure a real heart would cost more than 60.”
“Mmm, cost me even more to keep yours.” 
You glance over at Tomm—ahem, Teddy—sitting upright in the corner of the room, the dildo still strapped around his crotch, and at Mr. Oinkers who’s jittery fun was sometimes too much to handle, and at Valentine Puppy that has a permanent white streak in his hair when you tried washing out Joel’s cum, and at every other plush on this bed that has occupied an ever growing space in Joel’s horny head below the waist.
“I don’t love you just cuz of the plushies, you know.”
“Oh? I’ll take them all back then, since ya don’t appreciate—“
“No!” You cry desperately. “I—I love them.” You cold your cow plush close and kiss his head.
 Joel curls up next to you and spoons your body. “But I love you too. Just you.”
He hums in agreement. “I know you do. Who else would dress like that just for fun?”
You cringe at the image of the destroyed cow garter that sits helplessly on the floor. Definitely cost waaaaaay more than $60.
“I can’t wait to move in,” you mumble into the pillow.
“Oh—about that.” 
You lean back and meet his gaze. Was it a farce? Did he not actually want you to move in? Was it jut to get you excited for sex last night? You already feel your heart shattering, knowing its gonna take more than 60 bucks to put it back together—
“While you were sleeping…I brought all my shit here already. Cancelled my lease this month and packed for weeks. Figured it be easier than making you have to pack all your little fluffy bitches in boxes—”
“Well they wouldn’t go in boxes, they’d be buckled up in seatbelts.”
“Exactly my point. Would have been a nightmare trying to move you.”
You slap his shoulder.
“Um… what if I said no?”
“Oh…” the thought never actually crossed his mind that you’d say no.
You laugh again, kissing his jaw reassuringly. “Kidding, Bull Daddy.”
He grumbles into your back and kisses the back of your head. His big meaty paws rub over your thighs, the little dents from the strap still ghosting your skin, trailing up over your belly that he can’t wait to see swell one day, even if not any time soon, and snaking up to your aching chest—
“Don’t you dare touch my fucking tits.”
10 minutes later, you catch Joel’s cuddling the breathing cow right next to his face, snoring soundly as it exhales next to him. you kiss the tip of his noses and burrow yourself closer to your sleeping giant.
It really does help babies sleep.
- - - -
Notes: this ended up being waaaaaaay longer than I thought holy heck.
Bonus of Joel x Preggo reader thot in the plushies saga
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irisintheafterglow · 7 months
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hello…………..kiyoomi crumbs pls
ASK AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE
*patting the hood of a car* this bad boy can hold so much bf!sakusa
cw: swearing and the msby jackals being idiots
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you checked your phone again and prayed you weren't keeping him waiting for a long time.
"hi, is omi still in there?"
"he should be just about finishing up, but you can go ahead. you know your way around the place by now," the security guard states warmly, giving you the go-ahead to navigate the back halls of the gym to the men's locker room. even if you did find yourself lost, it'd be easy to get to your destination by simply following the banter of your boyfriend's three very spirited teammates. their voices grow louder with every step and you have to stifle a laugh when you start to pick up the bits and pieces of their conversations.
"and then she told me i was being delusional! can you imagine? me? delusional?"
"remind us all when you met this girl, atsumu?"
"...last week."
"dare i say, she has a point," deadpans the smooth, low voice of your boyfriend. he always knew the best ways to press atsumu's buttons, making it very difficult to invite his friends over for dinner without harmless arguing occurring at the kitchen table. "it's okay; i'm sure you'll find another 'love of your life' next week."
"shoyo, the fuck are you doin' with my shirt?"
"can you all please put clothes on? if sakusa's partner walks in here and all of you are naked-"
"i'm not naked!"
"we know you're not, bokuto, but atsumu needs to put his tits away before i cut them off with scissors," kiyoomi quips and you fail to muffle your snort from around the corner. the room quiets in an instant and you hear a faint fuck before he finally comes to find you. he's still slightly sweaty from practice, all toned muscle and messy hair and bright eyes that only twinkle for you. "hi, beautiful."
"hey, handsome. you done threatening physical violence in there?" your eyebrow quirks in question and he shakes his head tiredly, tugging you into him by the belt loops of your pants. your arms rest on his shoulders, brushing stray curls from his forehead.
"not yet. i still have some unfinished business."
"mmm, with razors, i hear." you nod in solemn understanding and his mouth quirks into a half-smile, another expression of his that was reserved only for you. his lips press a kiss to your temple in a rare show of public affection, inhaling your presence with his eyes shut contentedly. "i could be wrong, but a federal offense will probably screw up your olympic prospects."
"if you tell me to do it, i'll do it," he murmurs absentmindedly and you chuckle under your breath.
"what, murder atsumu or not murder atsumu?"
"dealer's choice." he places one more kiss on your nose before resting his forehead against yours like he'd been away from you for decades. to you, it was a few hours; but, to him, it felt like a century. "i missed you a lot."
"i can tell. you're very affectionate tonight." his forehead scrunches in confusion at the implication of your statement.
"what am i, a cat?" the incredulity in his voice makes you giggle and, despite his best efforts to remain stoic, you can tell he's fighting back a smile too.
"in some ways, yes. you do tend to leave hair all over our couch, and you make a lot of noise when you're hungry." he makes a proud noise in the back of his throat and lightly pinches the flesh of your sides in defiance.
"i'll buy us a new one if you want me to," he promises. you stopped sharing product ads with omi on instagram because he tended to buy you anything that you sent him, even if it was just a funny little trinket you saw on an etsy shop. these items included but were not limited to stationary, plushies, athleticwear, and, of course, furniture.
"you don't need to do that."
"maybe i already have."
"thanks for letting me know that your newest love language is buying me a sofa."
"my love language is doing whatever you want me to do, angel." you both jump when a loud crash comes from the locker room around the corner, followed by hinata's panicked rambling and bokuto saying "that was fucking epic!" atsumu, you'd guess, is either the culprit or the object that caused the crash. you gently push omi's sturdy shoulders away and he groans in protest. "do i have to?"
"wrangle your team, put some proper clothes on, and take me to dinner, lover boy."
"as you wish."
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if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)
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mercymaker · 3 months
Text
COMMISSIONS ARE OPEN ✨
My current situation, as well as living with chronic pain that often leads to me being sleep-deprived, make it difficult for me to work, especially scheduled hours, but I would like to make a little bit of money off my art, be it the pixel-kind or other. Most of my options are for Baldur's Gate 3, however, the simple edits as well as the physical items step outside of that realm. Here are the options:
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A set of 2 simple edits optimized for tumblr use (540x540) featuring your favorite character or an OC.
With or without text, with the color scheme of your choice.
I will need HQ shots of the character for the edits.
You can find more examples of the edits HERE.
PRICE: 5 EUR.
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A set of 2 character intro gifs featuring your favorite character or an OC.
Color scheme of your choice.
I will need the sliders/mod list of your character.
You can find examples of these gifs HERE.
PRICE: 20 EUR.
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A set of 4 colourful gifs featuring your favorite character or an OC.
Color scheme of your choice.
I will need the sliders/mod list of your character.
You can find examples of these gifs HERE.
PRICE: 20 EUR.
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A set of 2 cut-out gif edits featuring your favorite character, an OC, or a couple.
With or without text.
The background/color scheme can be adjusted slightly.
I will need the sliders/mod list of your character.
You can find more examples of these gif edits HERE.
PRICE: 30 EUR.
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A minimum of 2 shots featuring your favorite character, an OC, or a couple.
Editing in photoshop is free (or optional)!
I will need the sliders/mod list of your character.
The background/setting/animation is your choice, but I might need your save file if it's something very specific.
For posed shots you can either choose a simple background or in-game setting.
Standard vp dimensions: 2560x1440.
More examples of my virtual photography HERE.
PRICE: Listed above per 1 shot.
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I ALSO accept custom orders for the headpieces on my Etsy page.
Can customize the primary and secondary colors to your liking. The only limit will be the paint available to me, but I have a pretty decent collection, so don't be afraid to DM if you have a very specific idea!
PRICE: Listed on my Etsy store page.
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CONTACT ME:
You can reach me through tumblr DMs to inquire about a commission and then we could move to either email or discord for files/details.
WAIT TIME:
I reserve 2 weeks for each order or commission, please do not rush me, I am doing my best and will get back to you as soon as I can!
PAYMENT:
I accept payment through ko-fi, paypal, or etsy (if it's physical goods).
100% of the price is paid upfront after confirming the details. Please, do not send me a payment without confirming first (especially on ko-fi where I'd consider it a donation).
I reserve the right to decline a commission for any reason.
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theamazingannie · 1 year
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So kind of Taylor Nation to sell travel merch for those of us US swifties who are going to have to travel to Europe for a chance to see the tour
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