just saw a tiktok abt learning to be non reactive to our feelings and it's a good reminder for practice

You have your mothers eyes

Summary: You and the boys tell jack that family isn’t just in blood but in those around you....I guess idk I’m bad at summaries. Enjoy! or not I can’t tell ya what to do. 

You walked into the bunkers library to find Cas, Sam and Jack all working separately in silence. You’re eyes scanned the room and fell on Jack sitting gazing at a book not really reading it but more staring at the words lost in thought, you lightly placed yourself down in a chair beside him trying no to startle him “Penny for your thoughts” you asked peeking your head around behind the book to get his attention. Jack sprung to life “uhh I umm” looked at you muddled “Its an expression” your words fell flat in your throat and decided you explain it another time “whats on your mind you seem…distant” you asked him genuinely concerned. Jack closed the book and placed it silently on the table “Am I going to be like my father?” his voice flowed heavily from behind his lips, the room grew smaller as all attention fell to you and Jack. “Why do you ask that jack?” Cas inquired looking probingly at Jack. “I heard Dean telling Sam that he's as stubborn as their father, so I started reading about inherited behaviours” Jack said tapping the psychology book he has been reading…well staring at mostly. “Jack just because Lucifer is bad doesn't mean you will be” Sam said doing his best to reassure Jack. “But it says that children inherit behavioural traits from their parents how can anything i inherit from Lucifer not be evil” Jack said his voice rising a little, he was encompassed with fear at what he could become. You placed a hand on Jacks shoulder “Jack traits aren't inherently good or evil its how you use them” Jack looked at you his eyes almost begging for answers. You found your words carefully before speaking “Jack I've seen some of your fathers traits in you” Castiel went to interject but you threw him a look imploring him to trust you know what you were doing. “You have his determination” Jacks face paled with fear, you gripped his shoulder tighter “but Jack determination isn’t evil its a firmness of purpose Jack, sure Lucifers determination usually is for the purpose of destroying the world” you shrugged your shoulders in a comedic fashion in an attempt to lighten the situation to little success “BUT Jack your determination has been used to save people”. Colour returned to Jacks face “Jack your determination brought Mary back to her boys, it saved so many people from Michael and this thirst for destruction” Jack nodded at you gingerly. “Jack you may have traits of his but you will never be him, anyway you got so much more from your mother” Jack looked eagerly at you wanting to hear more. 

“You have your mothers eyes ”Jack looked up at you quizzically delicately tracing his under eyes “but my eyes are blue” A soft giggle escaped the corner of your mouth at his confusion, you brought his hand into yours “no jack what I mean is” you looked around the table for Sam’s laptop “here” you said pulling the laptop in front of you both and opening the video file of kelly. “I love you so much” kelly cried sweetly before you paused the video “Look into her eyes jack what do you see?”. Jack lightly titled his head at you questioningly ‘Go on” you nodded to the screen. Jack turned and studies his mother eyes intently “Tears and sadness” he said lowering his head to his chest, you placed a hand under his chin and guided his eyes to yours. “Oh jack, do you wanna know what I see?” he nodded gently. you pulled the screen closer to you both and made sure jack was focused on his mothers eyes. “Jack when I look into your mothers eyes the first thing I see is love so so much love and an unending pool of kindness. I also see hope and faith and the unbreakable desire to do good” Jacks listened intently as he scanned his mothers eyes taking in every word. you gave him a moment before bringing his eyes back to yours “and when I look into your eyes jack I see that same love and kindness, and faith but most of all I see that same desire to do good and be good”. Jack smiled warmly at you “That jack is why you have your mothers eyes, not for the colour of them but for the soul in them and they are so beautiful” jack leant back in his chair and started at the image of his mother smiling at her eyes as if only seeing them for the first time. 

You looked up to see Sam and Castiel looking at you smiling and nodding at you in agreement, you studied Castiels face. “And you've got Castiels face” Cas gave you the same look jack had given you moments before as he tilted his head, you shook your head gently and smiled “I mean much much younger looking tho” you giggled out, your giggle was joined by a slight chuckle from Sam. While jack and Cas wore mirroring looks of perplexity at your statement “ I swear they do that on purpose” you said to Sam gesturing at their shared expression. You and Sam shared a chuckle before you moved on to clarify your statement “What I mean is that you don't just get things from the family you are born of you are also made up of the family you are born into” their expressions softened a little but you knew you needed to further explain yourself. “The people around us help form who we are and in you jack I see elements of people like Cas and Sam and Dean” you saw a glimmer of pride in Jacks face he liked hearing himself compared to the men he looked up to, he looked eager to hear more as did Cas and Sam. “You’ve got a face that has seen more pain and death than any face ever should see” Jacks eyes grew sad “but its a face that never truly loses hope” Jack looked up at Cas and studied his face. “Cas has been through so much, he has made mistakes and seen atrocities but he's never given up not truely” You looked deeply into Castiels face remembering all the times before that you have looked to that same face for hope. “No matter how low we have been, no matter how hopeless the situation I can always look to Cas and see hope because he never gives up, not on us, not on heaven, not on you and I see that same hope in you” you looked to Jack as he watched you intently “your face wears signs of war but is not worn by war, its still so bright and full of hope” you delicately cup jacks cheek in your hand as he gently leans into it. “You also have the same nose” You say as pull you hand from his cheek and ‘Boop’ Jacks nose. Jack and Cas both look at each other while examining their noses, Sam just looks at them giving an acknowledging nod and slight hum “hmmm”. 

Jack then turns back to you tentatively waiting for you to continue, you look between Jack and Sam before landing on a point in your mind. “You have Sam’s voice” the room is silent, no one quite sure how to respond to that, “Metaphorically” you say rolling your eyes a little. Jack nods at you if understanding but the utter vacant look on his face makes his confusion clear, you sigh gently “Sam is a walking fountain of knowledge, inspiring speeches, logic, reason and kind words” Sam looked at you with an unsure but thankful look “ no matter how far off the deep end the people around him go Sam is always there to call their name and pull them back, he has talked me off many a ledge” Sam’s eyes lit up quizzically, you could feel his glaze burrow into you. “Whether he knows it or not Sam has come to me in my darkest hours, moments before going out on reckless hunt or to do something just down right dumb and even just a simple conversation is filled with words of wisdom spoken through unrelenting kindness” Jack nodded in agreement remembering the times Sam has reassured him of his worth and that he is indeed good. “And you have that same voice jack, a voice bathed in kindness and full of love for those around you” Jack smiled widely at you full of pride. “And you've got Deans heart”. They all looked at you as if fully understanding what you meant but still wanting you to continue, “Dean has such a big heart full of the desire to do good” your head hung slightly “but so caught up in turmoil, you both have this burning fear that your will and desire to do good doesn't out weight the bad that you’ve done  that you could do” the room grew heavier as the truth of that statement settled into place. “But you’re both so wrong” Jacks eyes met yours and for a moment you swam in their desire for good before continuing “you both fight so hard to save the ones you love, the whole damn world putting your whole heart into everyone else that you forget just how special you are” you notice a fleck of disappointment in jacks eyes and it pains you “Not because you’re a Nephilim or the chosen vessel or some prophesy of biblical proportions but because you are both deep down at heart good people doing their best in a broken world and are willing to not only die for those you love but more importantly you’re willing to live for them”. The room sat quietly for a moment until jack looked up at you and asked “What about you?” now you were the quizzical one “What about me?” you asked perplexed, “What do I get from you?”. You hum genuinely unsure of how to answer “I don’t know” you looked Jack up and down noticing his velcro shoes  and laughed “Probably terrible fashion sense why on earth did I let you get old man shoes” the room chuckled while Jack looked at his shoes unsure of what to make of the statement, when the sound was broken by a new voice. “Your smile” Dean’s voice occupied with room as all heads snapped around to see him standing in the entrance to the bunkers library with a six pack in hand, a small pool of water building below as the cold beers condensation dripped onto the floor marking the passage of time. “He’s got your smile” Dean repeated as he moved further into the room slowly handing out beers to the rooms occupants before seating himself next to you and handing you an open beer as he continued. “you’ve got a genuine smile that spreads from your cupids bow and reaches beyond the corners of your mouth to your eyes” Dean stared at you as a smile spread across your face, you were unable to stop it “But it’s higher on one side” Castiel chimed in. You looked at the angel genuinely shocked that had paid close attention to your smile, “Its can be rare but its always genuine, its never there to hide pain its like a sacred thing” Sam said nodding softy at you “You never want to taint it with sorrow so you keep that certain smile for special occasions” Dean finished Sam’s train of thought. “And I see it in Jack, that special smile of genuine happiness and hope as if given to him as gift” Dean said before taking another swig of his beer. Jack looked at your smile and felt as one corner of his mouth raised high than the other into a smile “I like it” he chirped “thank you for your smile” Jack said sweetly. You all sat contently drinking and just chatting for the rest of the night not about monster or the apocalypse on the horizon that could wait for tomorrow but tonight was a night to just forget the bad and enjoy the good while it lasted, if it lasted.