#destiny: mother didn't raise us to snitch | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

moderndaypandora · 1 year

Text

I love every "Death set Dream up with Hob on purpose" headcanon, and I love "actually I was planning to throw Chaucer at you but I can wing it pretty damn well and, once I heard Hob call me stupid, I knew, yeah that's going to be Dream's boyfriend". It takes a village (or an older sister) to get Dream a boyfriend.

Now, I'm picturing the entire Endless family blindsided when Dream comes to a family dinner like "I GOT MARRIED! LIKE TWO MINUTES AFTER THE LAST DINNER--" "That was a literal century ago?!"  "-- YEAH. WE'RE DOING A VOW RENEWAL."

Not a single sibling clocked this. Not even Destiny.

Destiny, out loud: it was an unlikely path in my book, so I didn't give it much attention  Destiny, in his head: honestly I started speed-reading/skimming through Dream's love life paragraphs because watching him crash and burn and cause massive body counts just seemed so... repetitive and predictable?

Death: knowing our brother, I was carefully managing my expectations and was just glad he was still doing the century meetups last time I'd checked. Good for him, managing to stay with somebody for a century, that outstrips his last relationship by ... like 7 decades. Kind of offended I wasn't invited to this wedding, kind of not planning to say anything?

Desire: At this point, I stick my fingers in my ears and go "lalalalalala" whenever I hear anything about Dream and want, either him wanting or somebody wanting him, because Death said I had to stop making fun of him for how disproportionate his Yearn to Act Ratio was, and any ammunition I can't use is just ... irritating. I figured if anything really changed, my twin would tell me about his descent into misery.

Despair: He was less miserable, but I assumed it was a fluke and he'd return to his normal equilibrium eventually. And it's not like my twin let me know he'd managed to successfully want AND obtain something?

Destruction is Sir Not Appearing In This Picture.

And Delirium had more important things to think about than her brother's sad love life, like would flying fish fired out of confetti cannons be considered birds until they landed?

Meanwhile all denizens of the Dreaming are never not aware that Dream is happily married, because the weather has been perfect for years and the throne room stained glass is some variation of Hob and Dream being lovey-dovey.

Lucienne: If I see them necking in the stacks ever again I will be forced to take action, and Lord Morpheus is aware of that fact, but we haven’t had a library flood in 103 years, so overall we’re pleased.

#silly nonsense #the sandman #dreamling #dream's love life is a car accident that everybody sees coming and either goes 'AGAIN?' or prepares popcorn for #and he's very aware of that fact #which is why he's like 'can we keep this private for a little while? not ashamed of you #just very aware of how my siblings will react. a lot of wincing and bet placing'#hob: your family places bets?#dream: yeah. destiny keeps a record of all wagers but doesn't take part since he's omniscient #hob: so isn't he already aware we're married?#dream: he's the one who taught me snitches get stitches #dream: and he errs on the side of 'if you don't already know #i shouldn't tell you'#(#destiny: mother didn't raise us to snitch #desire: mother didn't raise us at alll #)#dream: so he'll keep quiet because it's not his business #hob: alright but we're wearing wedding rings and if anybody asks we're not denying we're married #dream: [touched that hob's so emphatic that they're married]#idek what century this is happening in #it'd be funny if it's 18th or 19th #therefore there'd be no quarrel in 1889 #but if dream got fishbowled hob would be out for blood

781 notes · View notes