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#da doo
real-odark · 1 day
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thats why seymours stupid ass needs glasses........stupid idiot looked directly at the eclipse................fuckign dumbass did he not read the news.......uv rays seymour...........thats why youre slow...................and dead (directors cut).............
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What should I do today?
Tell me please
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infectedpaul · 24 days
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dont go to the downtown florists on april 8th 2024 around 1 40 est worst mistake of my life
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Since there's an Eclipse today, make sure you avoid strange and unusual plants.
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grimesgirll · 2 months
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you jumped at the chance to babysit for rick grimes.
your mom didn’t have to repeat herself when she instructed you to arrive at rick’s early the next morning to give him some help with his baby girl.
not that you minded, but you babysitting for rick was a part of your mother’s larger plan to welcome the new arrivals into the community. it was an easy way for the survivors - namely their leader, rick - to warm up to everyone. and you had to put your half finished developmental psychology degree to use somehow.
you’re disappointed when you show up bright eyed and bushy tailed to be greeted by rick’s son carl, and not the dreamy sheriff himself.
carl is more than happy to pass off the bubbly little baby - who you learn is named judith- to you and dash out the door after giving you the rundown on her routine and lack thereof.
it doesn’t take long for judith to get used to you - or get into the habit of pulling your long hair. carl mentioned that she’d had a solid breakfast already this morning so you hunker down next to her playmat to tire her out in preparation for her next nap.
thoughts drift from tummy time to the absent head of the house. where was he? you knew part of the reason you had even begun babysitting was to help rick with childcare if he accepted his new position as constable, but you couldn’t think of anywhere else he would be.
and truth be told, you’re disappointed.
the first day the southerners had arrived, you looked on as rick stepped through the gates, judith in his arms. you’d been shocked to see a baby but you were even more enthralled by the hot suburban dad who’d landed on your doorstep.
not as old as your own father but nearly old enough to be, rick grimes had been blessed by age. his wild, grown out hair and tense but demanding disposition immediately attracted your attention.
it’s wrong; you shouldn’t be crushing on the man you’re babysitting for.
but you’ve been so bored!
let’s be clear: alexandria is your home. the safe zone provided more stability than the road could ever offer but survival was boring. at least inside of alexandria.
but out there?
whatever was out there was written all over the face of every new survivor your community had taken in. you’d heard bits and pieces; cannibals, maniacs on a power trip, robbers, corrupt cops even in the end of times.
and you could really see it on rick.
he had the demeanor of someone always scanning the room for the exit. you’ve never seen him so much as smile so it’s hard to imagine anyone like him adjusting or relaxing, even somewhere like alexandria.
your mother had theorized that some childcare could help ease the ex-cop’s anxieties, give him and carl a chance to breathe.
someone like that needs a lot more than a day away from the kids though. rick grimes needed an all inclusive vacation
and maybe a blowjob.
you tear yourself away from your wild thoughts about the rugged leader to turn your attention to the little girl hitting you with all of the sleepy cues at once. glancing at the clock, you decide it’s time for a nap and scoop up the eight month old. it’s not until you try to lay her down in the nursery that judith gives you your first problem.
seems like you had a velcro baby on your hands.
your hypothesis is proven correct during little judith’s second afternoon nap when you’re resigned to the living room armchair.
any attempts to place the little girl on her back, stomach, or side were met with tears. you’d just huffed and posted up on the rocking chair, ready to rock her for the duration of her nap.
it could be a pain but some babies just slept better hearing another heartbeat besides their own. it’s biology. judith is long out of the fourth trimester but that doesn’t exempt her from wanting to fall asleep in a pair of warm, snuggly arms. and besides, it’s not like you have anything better to do.
so you’re still curled up with judith when her father arrives in the afternoon.
gun holstered on his hip, the front door swings open to reveal rick grimes, looking much more like a resident of alexandria than he'd arrived. despite his new haircut and the difference that a shower makes, rick still looks pent up to you. like the feral man who'd shown up at your gates was just bubbling under the surface.
“hey there,” he greets once he registers your presence.
in his constable uniform, rick is even more handsome than you imagined all cleaned up. his chestnut curls are trimmed - courtesy of your neighbor, jessie - and he’s fully fitted like an officer of the law, and not an outlaw.
"oh, hi," you sit up and offer as much of a salutation you can being nap trapped.
"you must be deanna's daughter."
"that's me," you chirp, keeping your voice low to avoid waking up the little girl on your lap. "sorry, you caught us during naptime."
the southerner shakes his head. "no problem. looks like you got her down easy enough."
easy? you want to ask him to repeat that again but you just smile.
"i'm sorry i wasn't here earlier to introduce myself, i'm rick." the man extends his hand to you and you have to steel your nerves so he doesn't feel your hand shaking.
you're shocked when you hear confidence dripping from your voice as you give him your name. under his dark blue gaze, you want to squirm but you're holding it together somehow.
"you know, you can probably get out here early today. carl should be home soon."
you do your best to hide your disappointment. "leaving early on the first day?" you grin. "i think i like this job."
that earns you a chuckle from the sheriff who points to the sleeping baby you're holding. "i've got it from here if you wanna head out."
you don't but you put on your pearly whites and utter a peppy "sure!" handing over the still sleeping judith to her father.
"thanks for agreeing to this," rick commends you, eyes looking over the picture books and learning materials piled up in your arms. "i really appreciate having someone here to look after judith during the day."
“don’t worry about it, she’s such an angel, rick.”
"yeah, she is," he agrees, pausing to glimpse down at the napping infant. "i guess we'll be seein' you tomorrow?"
“whenever you need me.”
as his gaze follows you out the front door, rick is hard pressed to confirm if that was actual innuendo that came out of your mouth or just a generous offer.
he’s even more surprised to see you on his doorstep again after supper.
“hey,” you start. “i think i forgot one of my books here when i was watching judith. do you mind if i grab it?"
your burnt orange journal is right where you'd left it - intentionally - on the accent table in the upstairs hallway.
"oh, perfect! it's right here," you exhale in manufactured relief as if you hadn't left it there a few hours ago just for this purpose.
"is she down?" you ask rick in your best quiet voice.
he nods his hickory head of hair. "wanna see her?"
you nod enthusiastically and he leads you a few doors down the hall where you two pop your heads into a dark, curtain drawn room.
“how’s she been sleeping?” you ask innocently, following the father’s gaze to the sleeping infant lying peacefully in her crib.
“good enough,” he grunts. “all things considered.”
“how have you been sleeping?”
a chocolate eyebrow raises.
“you know, you have to get some sleep too.”
“isn’t that you’re for?”
rick must notice your reaction from the way he clears his throat and walks back his words, clarifying, “taking care of judith and all so i can,” he makes air quotes with his fingers, “rest.”
breathing deeply in an attempt to calm your racing heartbeat, you offer a smile with your exhale. “yeah, but that’s only during the daytime. she still has two wakeups at night, right?”
the man leaning in the doorway beside you shrugs. “two or three, give or take.”
“that’s a lot of time to be waking up at night.”
his ocean blue eyes twinkle as he shoots you a look and crosses his arms. “tell me about it.”
you motion towards the crib. “so i know judith likes to be held for naps, but have you ever tried room sharing with her? or even sleeping with her in the bed?”
rick gives you a quizzical look. “i thought you weren’t supposed to let them sleep in bed with you.”
“only if you’re a heavy sleeper,” you discern. “or if you drink or you’re a smoker.”
“really?”
you nod. “it’s called the safe sleep seven. its a big thing in other parts of the world." you draw an awkward breath. "not that there's anything wrong with watching her from the monitor," you refer to the device in his back pocket.
"well," rick runs a hand through his dark waves, stopping awkwardly at the end like he forgot about his haircut. "judith's always been held so it wouldn't shock me that that's how she likes to go sleep."
"did you have to snuggle her to sleep to get her down tonight?" your honeyed voice inquires curiously.
"i held her." he answers with a sigh.
"it makes sense. humans are programmed to want to be close to each other."
a silence settles over the two of you before rick clears his throat. "yeah, maybe i'll have to look into this sleep safe seven."
"i can bring a book next time i'm over," you offer. "i was a developmental psych major in college."
"so you have a degree to babysit?"
you roll your eyes. "i was supposed to end up doing research. you know," you gesture to judith in her nursery. "working with younger kids like her and figuring out what works best for them for sleep, learning to eat, the potty, play, school, all that."
"sounds like you're pretty smart," the ex-cop concludes.
you shrug. "smart enough."
with that, you two are walking down the stairs and you're heading towards the door when rick asks you if you'd like anything to drink.
you stop in your tracks, turning around on one heel. "you know, i'm kinda thirsty. i'll actually take a water."
rick's hands around the cold glass must be tattooed in your mind from how intently you're watching him. you thank him for the glass and gingerly take a sip, taking a moment to notice how his hands are braced against the counter. a cacophony of cracks erupt when the man rotates his neck and you can't help but laugh.
the older man frowns. “what’s so funny?”
“did you not hear the way your neck cracked?”
he shrugs it off. “gotta do it sometimes.”
“not like that,” you insist, glancing at his hands again, you get an idea. “why don’t you let me show you how you’re supposed to crack that?”
rick gives you a sideways glance.
“my roommate was in school to be a masseuse.”
“you don’t have to do that.” he says quickly.
you shake your head at him. “it’s not a problem. you can give me pointers.”
it’s wrong; rick shouldn’t be face down on the sofa in the house your mother had given him, getting a massage from her young twentysomething daughter.
and he most definitely shouldn’t be trying to hide an erection.
never would he have imagined getting a massage from a college student a week ago. like the haircut, rick wants to accept your community’s gifts with tact but that’s hard to do when your hands are kneading lower and lower down his back.
“when was the last time you relaxed, rick?”
the question comes out of nowhere and he almost wishes judith would pop up on the baby monitor to spare him from answering.
“can’t tell ya’.” he replied honestly.
you hum in response, observing as he twitches under your mischievous ministrations. rick didn’t have to go to massage therapy school to know that this massage is nowhere near professional. it’s downright racy as your fingers skim the top of his lower back.
god, he has a nice ass for a dad, you muse. you wonder what he’d look like fully nude on this sofa and if you weren’t touching him through his undershirt.
“that’s a little low.” the new constable remarks, calling you out.
you giggle. “i don’t know. i think the muscles down here really need some attention.”
rick hisses when you venture past his lower back and squeeze. he wants to say something but it feels so fucking good to have the tension manually worked out of his muscles.
“flip over.”
rick is about to bust out of his pants.
“flip over, please.”
the brunette finally complies; he wants to be embarrassed but doesn’t have a second for the emotion because you’re falling to your knees in front of him, pointing.
“want me to help you with that?”
“what?” he sputters.
“please, let me.”
wow, you want him. and who is he to deny you? not with how much of a roller coaster the past few have been; he should at least get to decompress.
“go ahead-,” rick doesn’t get another word out of his mouth before you’ve fully yanked his pants down and scootch further between his legs, attaching a hand to his waist. you slide his briefs down and are almost smacked in the face by the eight inch cock in front of you.
“rick…”
“if it’s too big, i understand.”
he starts to say something else but can only manage a gasp once you swallow the first few inches of his cock in your mouth. you ease your way back up to alternate between gripping his length and lapping at his precum covered head.
god, he can’t let deanna find out.
or spencer for that matter. no need to give your brother another reason for rick to be on his bad side.
he can’t be bothered to think about your family when you’re on your knees with his dick in your mouth.
“you’re doin’ so good for me, honey,” rick praises.
you moan deeply around his cock as you fit him further down your throat. it doesn’t take long for his hands to find your hair and suddenly his thick length is sliding down. you just swallow around him the best you can. you wonder if he’d believe you if you said you’d never had a dick this far down your throat.
it’s only once your windpipe starts to feel rick’s size that you raise your mouth up and off of the man in front of, catching a shallow few breaths before diving right back down to envelope him in your mouth.
rick can’t get enough of this. a hot, more than willing knockout of a woman on her knees with nothing but relieving his stress on her mind. and nothing was a hotter than a girl who actually wanted to give a blowjob, and by the way you’re hollowing your cheeks and pumping what doesn’t fit down your throat, he knows you’re loving this. a good girl like you deserves more than just his dick in her mouth.
“slow down, sweetheart.” he instructs, even though it takes a moment for you to slow the vigorous pace you’d committed to. “i wanna help you out too.”
your eyes widen with delight and he doesn’t have to tell you twice to come up on the sofa with him. instantly, rick is in between your legs and undoing the button of your jeans in order to pull them down to your ankles.
his thick cock jumps at the sight of your sopping panties.
blushing, you lift your hips as rick clutches and discards the undergarment on the floor. that’s when he gets the opportunity to take in your already soaked little hole. he can’t help himself from slipping a finger in and driving it deeper at the sound of your raspy squeaks. the same noise comes out of you once he gives you another. you must’ve wanted this for a while from the way you coat his fingers. you’re wiggling and rotating your hips like they’re on fire and he only has two digits inside of you.
“easy, girl,” he warns and you pout as you struggle not to buck your hips.
“i need you, rick,” you gasp. “feel you in my core. i’m so hot for you right now.”
you so are. rick thinks and adds another finger.
not only are you making his dick swell more than he thought it could but your insides are hot. that tight little core is choking his three fingers like a boa constrictor.
“i’m gonna come on your fingers,” you make him aware, hoping he’ll move you to his cock.
“go right ahead, sweetheart.”
so you do.
you let out a muffled sob into his shoulder. he doesn’t stop scissoring his fingers into you until he removes them from your reluctant cunt. your mouth opens automatically when he lifts his sticky digits to your mouth. enthusiastically, you let him slip them into your mouth and suck until they come out clean.
you can barely respond to the “good girl,” he’s whispering huskily into your ear because your lips are pressed to his. disregarding the fact that your pussy is dripping all over the new sofa, you fold into the kiss.
where have you been? you wonder while his tongue starts to pick a fight with yours. the fact that you’re suddenly in his lap doesn’t register until you feel his hand on the small of your back.
“you’re up,” he whispers in your ear before shifting you on top of him.
you only understand what he means when you suddenly feel like you’re being torn in half. “fuck,” you exhale, conscious not to be too loud as to wake up the baby upstairs.
from his rapid breaths into your bust, you can tell that’s holding back.
“rick,” you whine.
fingertips find your hips just as your arms wrap around his neck and you’re holding on for dear life as the constable starts lifting and lowering you on his cock.
“god,” you cry through gritted teeth.
rick is fucking you just like you thought he would.
he doesn’t wait for you to roll your hips or ride him, no, he just fucks you. yeah, you’re on top but rick is the one pounding into you from below. you feel every ridge and vein on his impossibly thick cock as you brings you up and down on top of him.
this is the fucking that you expected from the dauntless, untamed man that rolled through your gates with his equally intimidating allies. you wonder how long it’s been since rick had a good fuck. by the way he ruthlessly spears you on top of him, you know it’s been months at least. you conclude it probably wasn’t for his lack of skill though, not with how he maintains a delicious pressure on your clit with those same digits he used on you earlier.
your core is calling again: this time it’s lava hot. whatever tension rick had you dripping at earlier is no comparison to the overwhelming internal buzz pulsing inside of you.
“fuck, honey, you’re gushin’ around me.”
you look down. he’s right; you’ve made a slick mess of both of your laps. the words to respond don’t make it to your mouth because rick is once again picking up the pace.
every time you coil around him, rick just adopts a more devastating pace. it’s like after months of going without, he’s doing everything in his power to be as deep inside of you as possible. any deeper and he’d be back in your throat.
“you gonna come again on my cock, baby?” the brunette murmurs in your ear.
“yes, sir.” you croak, not having the capacity to comprehend what your words were doing to him. unless your body and the mind of its own it had counted.
your core is reacting right on time to rick’s consistent teasing. “that’s it,” he encourages, applying even more pressure despite your shaking legs. every time you sink down onto him, you feel full to the hilt.
“ah, fuck.”
rick’s orgasm hits before your finale; nonetheless, his tightening embrace and desperate thrusts into you are just what you need. the contrast of your hot core with rick’s warm cum should make you sick with worry and maybe something else but you’re too fucked out and drawn into your peak to care.
sweat coats your brow and your hair is sticking up in every direction but you’re just swallowed up by the tightening in your core. swallowed by how full you feel. you feel like you could make even more of a mess on top of rick.
the jolt that reverberates through your core this time is galvanizing. you wonder if there was anything before this orgasm.
head laid forward against his chest, perfectly glistening tits rising and falling with each full breath, you are at peace. who knew that relieving rick of his stress could bring you so much pleasure?
and when you look up at him, all you can do is offer a pupil blown smile.
he might just like alexandria.
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twdxtrevor · 11 months
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Truly walking him like a dog, I volunteer to go next
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itsbetterthananal · 2 months
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shane picking the mystery with the most alien potential ever and then being frustrated with ryan for saying it with his whole chest is so on brand
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lilgoblinbitch · 2 months
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need him to fuck me with those dog tags on.
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jonnywaistcoat · 11 months
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Hey Jonny, would you happen to have sheet music for Gunpowder Tim vs The Moon Kaiser?
My friend, I'm afraid you may have misunderstood what sort of band we were. Writing sheet music would very much have required a level of diligence and professionalism that we simply did not possess, and the music changed so often and so significantly that if we had written any it would have been obsolete within months. As far as I'm aware there is no sheet music for any of it.
That said, there almost certainly is sheet music for some of the WW1 songs we based bits on (Goodbyeee, Gassed Last Night, Over the Hills etc) and Teatime with the Kaiser was a riff on "Kicking Horses on Brokenhill" by Godspeed You! Black Emperor, so that might be something to look into
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kvalentineart · 1 month
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Mr. Andrew Lincoln as Rick Grimes in TOWL 👏😌✨
Original art by me, @kbalentineart on IG! Please repost with creds 🥰🫶
@itsgrimeytime
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maddyb-rapps · 2 months
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HOW IS BRO STILL GETTING FINER AND FINER EACH DAY
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bbsxsaa · 3 months
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“ do u have any idea who ur talking to?”
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quicksilversg1rl · 2 months
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DADDY’S HOME
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THE FIRST EPISODE WAS TOO GOOD
all credits to @/notjoseq on tiktok for the edit!
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grimesgirll · 2 months
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sometimes you loathed sleeping in the middle just for the difficulty getting out of bed. if you were sandwiched between rick and daryl, then you had to peel their arms off - if you could manage to shrug off rick - and scootch to the end of the bed, using your arms even to bring yourself forward without making too much of a commotion.
“where’re you goin’, sweetheart?”
“bathroom.”
you send him a smile and peel his arm off once again to push off the bed and pad over to the en suite.
he’s all over you once you return to the bed and crawl on hands and knees back to your spot. before your head hits the pillow, rick’s hands are on you and wrapping around to lock you into his embrace.
rick needs you to sleep. you’re his soft, pliable paperweight. it’s just something you’ve picked up about the man. being the number one person he wanted in his arms flattered you. however, you weren’t prepared for how often rick took advantage of this access.
you’re choking back sweet moans once his two fingers breach your walls. you want to be shocked at the forwardness but rick knows you too well. instead, you’re grinding your hips back into him.
“you’re getting me all flustered again,” you mumble.
rick picks up the pace. “what? you don’t wanna cum all over my fingers before you go to bed?”
you nearly double into daryl hearing the sheriff’s words. “yes!”
“man, you’re keepin’ her up.”
rick clicks his tongue. “i don’t see her complainin’.”
you want to chime in with some smart comment but you’re too busy getting rick’s thick fingers jammed up your pussy.
“i don’t think you’ll be complainin soon enough.” rick remarks playfully to the other man. he lowers his lips to your ear. “wanna help us all sleep better, sweetheart?”
you shake your head sure.
next thing you know you’re on your hands and knees facing daryl. a hand in your hair guides you to his clothed cock.
“why don’t you show daryl how much you like us keepin’ you up?”
daryl sends you a look like he feels guilty that you’re freeing his pants instead of soundly sleeping but any remorse is gone once you flick your tongue against the side of his shaft.
rick lining himself up and subsequently knocking the wind out of you with a rocky thrust drives you right down daryl’s dick. you gag and daryl nearly jumps out of bed at the sudden feeling.
you feel like you’re being split open with rick ramming into you from behind. every thrust bounces you further up and down daryl’s cock. his hands find your braids. you braided your hair at night to lock in moisture not that rick didn’t love tugging on them so hard they unraveled.
stuffed to the hilt with cock, you’re finding it hard to think about anything else than the men pistoning you between them. all to sleep better. god knows they needed it though. the weight atlas had on his shoulders was nothing compared to what rick and daryl were saddled with.
at the very least, you could offer your ever accommodating pussy. it wouldn’t solve all of their problems but you could help.
and when they take such good care of you, how can you refuse?
circling back to your pleasure, rick reaches down to linger a finger or two strategically against your clit. you know it won’t be long for you once he maintains the same excruciating pace he liked to subject you to in order to get you coming twice on his cock; once to get started and once to finish him off.
after that, daryl would cum down your throat and bring you in for a heated kiss, nearly forcing you back into rick- still inside of you. eventually, rick’s pulling out to grab a soft towel to clean you off with while daryl lifts your hips for you so you can focus on his tongue between your teeth.
rick will bring over your favorite oversized sweatshirt of his to drown in. then you’ll be back, hugged to his chest.
daryl eventually rolls closer so you can lay your head on his chest. the position may require some reconfiguring as the night goes on but they’ll probably just shift you in your sleep so you don’t worry about it.
it won’t be long again until you’re waking up feeling needy or they are or you’re met with something hard beside you.
and this is why you love sleeping in the middle.
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twdxtrevor · 10 months
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I'll never get over these two, Andy and Norman <3
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