#clara; seizing the opportunity to antagonize Velvette: 😈
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DIHWYF Incorrect Quotes but it's mild Carmine sisters chaos
Because ✨sisters ✨
Clara, staring at newly adopted Vaggie: Um...want a beer?
Odette: She's like...five!
Clara: I DUNNO, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH HER?!
Clara: I'M BREAKING THE WINDOW!
Odette, whispering into her phone: Uh, hi- we locked our baby sister in the car and people are judging us.
Clara, now running around looking for a rock: I SWEAR TO GOD I'M GONNA BREAK IT!
Odette, whirling around: DO NOT BREAK THE WINDOW, YOU'LL GET GLASS ON HER!
Odette: But if you keep making up words, no one will understand you.
Young Vaggie: Clara will. Watch. *tugs on Clara's arm*
Clara: Yeah, squirt?
Vaggie: *complete gibberish*
Clara, immediately playing along: Whoa, are you serious?
Vaggie: *more gibberish*
Clara: I'd never considered that before!
Vaggie: *very serious gibberish*
Clara, patting her head: This changes everything.
Odette, facepalming: You're both crazy.
*Odette, spotting Vaggie trying to sneak out of her bedroom: Oh, not again. Come on, go back to bed before Mamá sees you.
Vaggie: But I don't want to go to bed!
Odette: Too bad, manita.
Vaggie, pouting: Why do I have to go to sleep? Why can't I just stay awake all night?
Odette, sighing and getting up to walk her back bed: Because that's the way the world is.
Vaggie: Well I'm going to make it so that's not how the world is!
Odette, tucking her in: That sounds like a big job. You're gonna need a full night's sleep for that.
Vaggie: Yeah, I will! *triumphantly snuggles in*
Vaggie, ten minutes later: Hey, wait a second-
Vaggie, curled up in front of the fridge: :(
Clara, spotting her: You alright, hermana?
Vaggie, sadly: I just miss Odette**.
Clara, sitting down next to her: Aw, I know.
Vaggie: And the fridge doesn't like me :(
Clara: I...know?
*Odette: Bed. Sleep. Now.
Vaggie, trying to hide behind Clara: But I'm not tired!
Clara: Yeah, 'Dette, she's not tired!
*they're both asleep in Clara's bed in ten minutes later*
Clara, snuggling lil' Vaggie: Big sister's going to drop-kick anyone that touches you 🥰
Odette, without missing a beat: And bigger sister's going to bail big sister out of jail.
Carmilla, cuddling Vaggie after she tripped and fell: I know it's tough, mija. But hey, how many times have you bumped your head or gotten a bruise while you're playing with your sisters?
Vaggie, holding an ice pack on her knee: Um...lots.
Carmilla: Right. And what do they always tell you?
Vaggie: ...don't tell Mamá?
Carmilla, who was fully expecting a different answer: What?!
Clara, who'd walked into the room to check on her little sister: Uh...I'll maybe come back later?
Clara, holding an ice pack to her sister's head: How much do you remember?
Teenage Vaggie, who'd just gotten into her first fight: Just the ambulance ride to the hospital, I think.
Odette: That wasn't an ambulance ride, I drove you.
Vaggie: But I heard sirens?
Clara: That was your girlfriend.
Charlie, clutching the largest teddy bear the hospital sold***: I got nervous!
Charlie, fresh into their relationship: If something happened to Vaggie, I...I couldn't live with myself.
Odette, completely straight faced: You wouldn't have to. Clara and I would kill you.
Vaggie, trying to sneak off with Charlie at a party: Guys, I need your help.
Clara: Oooh, ok. I have an idea.
Odette: Is it a bad idea?
Clara: *darts off in Velvette's direction*
Odette, jumping up to chase after her: CLARA, IS IT A BAD IDEA-****
Vaggie, walking by with a teapot:
Clara: Whatcha doing?
Vaggie: It's for Zestial. I'm planning on making some bad choices tonight and I want him on my side when Mom finds out.
Clara: Oooh, smart. I'll have to remember that.
Odette, not looking up from her laptop: I never realized the forethought that went into raising our mother's blood pressure.
BONUS:
Carmilla, trying to calm Lucifer down after he came to her for advice about Charlie: Look, I've raised three fully functional, well adjusted children and-
Luci, sniffling: You have three kids I don't know about?
Carmilla: ...
BECAUSE I LOVE THEM ALL
Here's a link to the AU!
*these exchanges definitely took place less than an hour apart.
**Odette is fine, she's just on a business trip and her sisters are sad.
***That bear is not for Vaggie. She has a different one for Vaggie. The older Carmines got her that so she would calm the fuck down
****is this a hint as to how Charlie and Vaggie meet? 🤫
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel vaggie#didithurtwhenyoufell#vaggie is a carmine au#clara carmine#odette carmine#hazbin hotel clara#hazbin hotel odette#hazbin hotel carmilla#carmilla carmine#hazbin hotel zestial#Carmilla adopts Vaggie au#found family#my au#charlie morningstar#chaggie#hazbin hotel velvette#vaggie; I need a distraction#clara; seizing the opportunity to antagonize Velvette: 😈#sometimes being a good wingwoman means picking a fight with the bratty overlord who insulted your parents#hazbin hotel lucifer#that last one isn't canon it's just funny#mostly sourced from bluey and modern family#hazbin hotel incorrect quotes
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