#carollyfic
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I can’t believe Caz is actually 40. I remember so clearly back in 2012, when the tag was booming and they made that pact and we were all like ‘Well they’ll be married by then anyway’ and yet here we are. I feel a bit weird about it all, like she’s actually 40, it feels like such a big Carolly milestone and yet. Anyway here’s some fic.
After all these years, carolly rpf
It hadn’t been her idea. She had been dreading it really, the 4-0. Forty. She couldn’t actually believe she was 40. She remembers when she was 16, 40 seemed like an old lady age, where you’d wear a twin set, go to PTA meetings, and say you’d meet up soon with acquaintances but never actually did. It feels nothing like that. Mostly it is disbelief, incredulity and slight panic, ok maybe more than slight.
But she couldn’t say no to a party, how could she? Her loved ones knew she loved a party, but she hadn’t wanted to make such a big deal about it. Not shine such a spotlight on her age, all of that which was behind her, and her uncertain future. So many of her friends had had to find babysitters for the evening that it had left her wanting and bereft. Jo had left the kids with Jason, her own party tomorrow, a do at home with all the family. It still startled Caroline how different their lives were. When Caroline was 16, there definitely would have been a babysitter involved in her vision of her 40 year old self. For Jo it had come true.
Despite her misgivings, the ample bar selection and the company of her favourite people, is making her enjoy the evening much more than she had imagined she would. Caroline hadn’t been in charge of the guest list and she keeps running into people she hasn’t seen in an eon, with delight.
Whilst catching up with Dee and Dermot, a familiar and warm touch floats by her side, an arm sliding through hers and a whisper in her ear ‘hey stranger’. Caroline’s heart falls right through her feet.
‘Mind if I take her away?’
‘All yours Olly’ says Dermot with a smirk
Her feet follow without conscious action from her brain. She has been thinking about him all day, and now he is here, like she magicked him into existence. The club they have hired is a labyrinth of alcoves and secret hidey holes. She passes many of her friends making out in them before Olly pushes a handle down and swings her around in an empty room. There’s a couple of mint velvet sofas, old fashioned sconces set in the wall, the lightning dim and a low coffee table littered with books and half burnt candles.
‘So, should I propose now or?’
Her heart leaps back up and nearly falls out of her mouth
‘What?’ is her response to that
Olly grins at her in a way he used to do before he’d start taking her clothes off. God that grin, the sight of if after so many years makes her want to push Olly onto the sofa and fuck him right there and then. They’d been doing pretty much exactly that, this time four years ago. And it had been her birthday so it had involved all her favourite things.
‘Caz?’ breaks her reverie
‘Hmm?’ Caroline shakes her head, bites her lip and looks up
‘You alright there?’
‘I, just- ‘she waves her hands about ‘memories’
‘I know’ he sighs and then smiles again ‘so?’
‘So what?’
‘So’ he says slowly, walking towards and taking her hands in his, running his thumbs over the tops of her hands, little lightning sparks breaking out against her skin. She wants to kiss him so badly it aches, happy birthday to her?
‘Should I propose now or?’
‘I’m sorry what?’ she laughs ‘are you being serious or?’
‘Yes?’ he says unsurely ‘I mean we had a pact’
‘Yeah, that if we were both single at 40, we’d get married’ she starts to count with her fingers ‘one, you’re not forty, and two, you’re not single’
‘Well, two I am actually’
‘I thought you were dating some bodybuilder?’
‘I’m not. You believe everything the papers say?’
‘Well no, I believe basically nothing the papers say’
‘So, are you single, or are you still seeing Lewis?’
‘I’ she stalls ‘I, no- ‘she takes a deep breath ‘we broke up a while ago actually, he was never really more than a fling’
‘So, there you go, we’re both single’
‘But not 40’
Olly rolls his eyes and leans in and pecks her lightly on the lips, the type of kiss they used to do back when they were ‘just friends’. She hasn’t kissed him in almost 4 years, it stings and sings at the same time.
‘I can’t be 40 at the same time as you Caz, maths doesn’t work like that. Bit of a flaw in the plan we made’
Caroline lets go of his hands, a flicker of dismay passing over Olly’s face before she hooks her arms around his neck and pulls him into her, and kisses him, properly this time. The feel of his lips on hers, brings her memories flying in, pulling her back to 2015 in the space of a heartbeat.
He had bought her an expensive coat and paid the entire bar tab. They’d sang Rendezvous in a taxi and had done plenty of the same back at her flat. They had laid there afterwards, her stomach swarming with butterflies, her heart full of love, her head light because of the alcohol and how damn happy she was.
Snapping back to reality, Caroline pulls herself away from Olly, his eyes gazed over with lust, she wonders if he was having the same flashback as her.
She nods towards the sofa and taking her hand, they walk the few steps there, Caroline making sure they sit at either end, least she feels the urge to climb into his lap. She looks towards the door and sees a twisty lock in the door. She can hear the thrum of the party, the bass beneath their feet. All her DJ friends are taking stints playing music, she thinks it is Gemma Cairney’s turn, she’s playing Bump and Grind, a definite Xtra song.
Caroline runs her hands over her legs, like she is smoothing out a crease on her skin and turns to Olly
‘I didn’t plan this, you know, I didn’t even want a big party’
‘You wanted to run away and hide?’
‘A little bit’ she shrugs ‘I didn’t think this is what 40 would be like’
‘I thought I’d be married with kids by now’ Olly admits, inching infinitesimally closer ‘which is why we made the pact Caz, and don’t you think it says something that we are both still single at 40?’
’35’
‘35’ Olly repeats, rolling his eyes
‘Ols’ she says slowly, thinking through her words carefully ‘why are you suddenly bringing up the pact now? Besides the obvious? I wanted to get together four years ago and you weren’t having any of it’ she lets out a sad laugh ‘I miss you, I miss you so damn much, but how do I know you’re not going to stomp all over my heart again? You broke me, completely broke me’ a tear slides down her face as the laugh resurfaces again ‘and I know, I know, we’ve gone through it all, and we’ve put it behind us, I’ve forgiven you, but I don’t know if I can ever forget. You’re gonna have to prove it Olly’
And as if he was waiting for that cue, Olly reaches into his pocket and pulls out a little box, snapping it open to reveal a ginormous diamond ring
‘Fuck me’
‘Caroline- ‘
‘Olly, no!’
‘You can’t stop a man in the middle of a proposal!’
‘We’ve not even slept together in four years! We didn’t speak for two, I’ve only just kissed you again! You can’t just propose! Oh my god’ she leaps to her feet ‘you stay here, I’ll be back’
Not looking at him, Caroline runs to the door and pulls it open, back into the melee of the party.
----
After tracking down Jo who had been chatting to Dawn, and pulling her quite forcibly to the bathroom, with Dawn, and then Sam bringing up the rear, Caroline finds herself surrounded by their aghast faces
‘He proposed, like proposed proposed?’ Dawn says
‘Well I mean, he had a ring, a fucking huge ring, and I ran away before he could more than tell me off for interrupting him proposing. So eh yeah?’
‘I mean it is your 40th Carrie’ Sam chimes in ‘you did have the pact after all’
‘It’s not like it was a legally binding agreement Sam’
‘Well’ Sam shrugs ‘I was kind of hoping it was, it’s why I invited Olly’
‘I was wondering who had invited him’ mutters Jo
‘You weren’t going to?’
‘Well no, I know you guys are better now, but I didn’t know if you’d want to deal with him on your 40th, not after everything’
‘We kissed’ Caroline says, realising she has left out that detail ‘god I’ve missed kissing him’
Sam’s eyes almost bug with glee, whilst Dawn and Jo share a knowing look
‘You guys, focus! I need help, I’m having a crisis’
‘The love of your life just proposed to you, what a crisis’
‘Dawn, stop thinking of book ideas’
‘I wasn’t…’
‘And we all know it isn’t that easy. It’s not like we’ve been dating for years and now he’s decided to pop the question’
‘Well no, you guys were never that simple, but sure an eight year just friends saga, intermittent with various other relationships, press scrutiny, a we’ll get married at 40 pact, and a brief but wonderous interlude where you were fucking every five seconds, whilst you hosted the biggest show on telly, but then didn’t speak for two years because of misunderstandings but now it’s all fine again, that’s basically the same thing as you’ve been dating a few years and he’s just popped the question’
‘Thanks for the summary Sam’ Caroline says stoic
‘You’re welcome’ Sam replies, with absolute sincerity ‘but honestly, Carrie, I think you’re just freaking out because of when this is happening, rather than the actual thing. If Olly had proposed right after X, you’d have said yes without even thinking’
‘It was different back then, I was, we were- ‘
‘You were in love with him, we know, but I reckon you still are’
‘And so, what if I am?’
‘What if you are, you should marry the boy shouldn’t you?’ reasons Dawn
‘Exactly how big is the ring?’ Sam asks
‘Huge, so much bigger than the one Andrew gave me’
‘I mean it wouldn’t be hard’ mumbles Sam
Caroline lets that one slide, knowing it’s true
‘Carrie’ Jo interjects, having been quiet a while, mulling the whole thing over ‘really the most important, the only question really, that you have to ask yourself, is do you want to say yes? Do you want to marry Olly? Do you believe he’ll never hurt you again? Do you miss him? Is he the love of your life? Do you want to spend the rest of your life with him? Because if so, it’s obvious what you have to do’
Caroline stares at her feet, her head pounding with the last hour of her life, her heart and head fighting for first place, what to do, how to decide. She looks up to find Dawn, Jo and Sam staring at her, the answer they want clear across their faces.
----
The party doesn’t wind up until the early hours, the paps growing restless outside, her guests leaving in dribs and drabs. She is staying in a hotel nearby, needing a break from the paps at her front door, and not wanting to bother with the commute after her party. She has texted Olly the details, her car pulling up outside the hotel less than 5 minutes after she has left the party. She can see Olly sitting in the bar.
Having already checked into the hotel earlier in the day and having gotten ready there, Caroline simply catches Olly’s eyes and then walks to the lift where he dutifully follows.
Yet more 2015 memories fight for attention, all the clandestine nights spent at the Hilton, all the checking as they ran up and down hotel corridors. Sometimes they’d go from being live on telly to being in one of their hotel rooms making out within ten minutes. The proximity of their hotel and how quickly it enabled them to get naked was the best thing about X Factor.
Caroline sits on the bed, Olly standing before her, memories, memories, and he is leaning down, his hand on her face, pulling her lips to his as he falls on top of her. And her past and her future collide. Caroline hears the ring thud loudly along with the jacket as she slips it off Olly’s shoulders and it falls to the ground.
It reminds her of the Hilton, where the carpets were soft and luxurious, where thuds were quiet. She had been glad of that.
Caroline remembers the very first time they had had sex in the Hilton, they hadn’t even made it to the bed, they had just fallen to the floor and done it there instead. She remembers the urgency as if it was yesterday, a need for Olly, a primal ache, ripped clothes and fast fingers and everything exploding with ecstasy.
The carpet burns would have been hard to explain but they were mostly to her lower back and not as bad the ones later on from when they’d done it on the rug at her house. She remembers another time she had bruised her knee from the confined shower, she didn’t care about any of it. It had all become an addiction, and now, she is falling off the wagon spectacularly.
She knows they need to talk, she needs to answer but it’s like a well-rehearsed dance. And she has missed this so much. The feel of his weight on top of her, his lips on hers, his fingers and tongue and all the pleasure they could induce.
‘Darling, darling, darling’ he mutters between her legs, kissing her inner thighs, moving upwards, oh fucking hell, happy birthday to her.
---
‘Ols?’
‘Yeah?’
She is staring at the ceiling, they’re high up, the 14th floor and they hadn’t bothered to close the curtains, she watches the lights on the ceiling, Olly tucked into her side. She feels spent, sated, content right down to her toes.
‘Did you really mean it?’
‘About getting married?’
‘Yeah’
‘Course I did, you think I bought that ring for nothing? Bit of an expensive joke’
‘But why now?’
As happy as she is, she needs this little worm of worry to be rid of
‘Caz, I- ‘he rolls over, Caroline shimmying to face him
‘You know when we didn’t speak for two years?’
‘Hmm’
‘And when you haven’t spoken in that long, you need something to bridge the gap, to break the ice, and you- ‘
‘I wrote the letter, yeah’
‘Yes, you wrote the letter and I called you and we went over everything and became friends again. We needed something to get us back on track. Well’ he gestures to the room at large ‘this is like that. I couldn’t just pop over to yours on a Tuesday afternoon and propose, there needed to be an opening, and we had the pact, so I figured, well it was a good a time as any’
‘When did you buy the ring?’
‘In the summer, I bought it when I was high on morphine after my knee surgery and then my sober self freaked out, before realising that it was a good idea. The best idea really’
‘So, you really do- ‘
‘Want to marry you? Yes, I do’
The words send Caroline’s heart in a flutter, this doesn’t feel real, a bit too much and she pinches herself, hard. Olly leans over and kisses the mark.
‘So?’
‘So’ she runs her hand along his arm ‘I need time Olly, can we actually date? Can we try to be normal for once? Can you ask again soon?’
She can already hear her friend’s protests in her ears, but Olly just smiles and kisses her
‘Of course I can’
----
It is the most normal they have ever been. They go on dates and stay over at each other houses and comment on each other’s Instagrams while sat next to other on the sofa.
They buy each other Christmas gifts and kiss as the fireworks and the chimes of Big Ben announce the new year. She jets off to Love Island the very next day and he surprises her by turning up in South Africa to keep her company for a week. She flies back to London on Valentine’s Day and they both make sappy posts and adorn each other with kisses and gifts. They do weekly shops, train together and walk the dog in the park, it is boring and beautiful domestic bliss. In March they go away for the weekend, to a country hotel with luscious sweeping grounds and a spa.
They go for a walk in the grounds, Caroline’s arm tucked through Olly’s, her hand winding into his pocket and holding his hand there. It is cold, a bite of frost in the air, but it is clear and bright, and Caroline stops for a moment, to close her eyes and breathe in the fresh air, letting out a happy sigh.
When she opens her eyes, Olly is down on one knee underneath a cherry blossom tree, the petals falling like confetti onto him, getting stuck in his hair.
He grins as she stands with her hands over her mouth, dumbstruck, tears sliding down her cheeks
‘Caz, I have waited long enough, I have let Christmas and New Year’s and Valentine’s Day slide by, and the day after your birthday where I was very tempted to try again. I love you darling, I always have done, and it would be an honour to spend my days loving you and for you to love me in return. There’s no one else I want to tackle this life with, so Caz, my love, will you marry me?’
Caroline mutely nods, her breath having gone and taken her voice with it. Olly stands, beaming, and slides the ring onto her finger, before dipping his head and kissing her.
Leaning her forehead against his, she leans back, the image of Olly with the most joyous smile across his face, all the pink floating around his head, one she will cement in her memory forever more. This, this here, this moment, and this man, the future ahead of them, this is what she had imagined forty would be like, and it could only get better from here.
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Weekends in bed; carolly fanfic?
I JUST FOUND THIS IN MY DRAFTS FROM 2013 WOAHHH (my first, and last, tiny attempt at fanfic, woah)
'It's so obvious you love him Caroline'
'Dawn, it's because I do, I love him so so much.'
'And I told you so, all that 'just friends' business was a load of rubbish' Dawn winked at her best friend.
'Dawn..'
They both let out a small giggle- Caroline hated being proven wrong, especially by her best friend. Caroline had Dawn over for a girls night in, it had been a hard day at work, the first day of filming for the new series of Xtra.
'I really miss him you know'
'Carrie, that's obvious too, you don't have to say.' Dawn replied, picking up her wine glass and taking a sip.
‘But, it’s been 5 days, I really do miss him. I love him.’ Caroline was trying her best to hold back the tears, even in front of Dawn.
'He's all you think about isn't he? Thanks for that, you do know I'm your best friend'
'Yeah, well, sorry.'
'Aww, come here Carrie, you know I'm only joking with you'
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Forever
We pushed through the crowded airport and headed towards our gate. Olly lead the way as his hand firmly held mine, pulling me along behind him as we ran to make our flight. “Phew,” he sighed, as we boarded the aircraft. We took our seats and sat down. He let me take the window seat and I thanked him by placing a light kiss on his lips. This was it, our flight to America had finally arrived. The most romantic way to spend our one year anniversary. The announcement to fasten our seat belts called over the speaker. We buckled up before preparing for the take off. My stomach dropped as I felt the plane lift itself and all of the passengers into the air. Once I was relaxed, I turned to Olly and smiled before resting my head on his shoulder. He stroked my hair and planted a soft peck on my forehead, making me feel safer than I’d ever felt. Panic struck me when I felt an unusual shudder in the plane, and I could hear worried sounds coming from the surrounding passengers. I looked at Olly. “Don’t worry babe, go back to sleep.” He said, but I could see the fear in his eyes. I sighed and snuggled back into his chest, trying to ignore all of the worry that took over me. The plane shook again. “Ladies and gentleman, we seem to be having some technical difficulties. Please remain calm.” By now, I had tears in my eyes, and Ollyvhad tears in his. A more distressed call was made over the speaker. “Okay everyone, if you could please put these masks on and hold on tight. We’re going to do everything we can!” The gas masks fell from the roof and everyone panicked to grab one. Olly put mine on for me before even worrying about himself. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I looked out the window and saw the plane descending. I turned around and saw the elderly couple behind me, holding each other’s hands and exchanging their last words. I looked across from us and saw a Mother saying her final thoughts to her children. From what I could see, the man in front of me had his hands clapped together, as he prayed to God. “Olly!” I cried out. We knew what was happening. This was it. He didn’t say anything. He just unbuckled my seat belt, and pulled me onto his lap. He cradled me in his arms, as I buried my face in his chest. Olly held onto me tighter than ever and stroked my arm. “Shhhh, it’s okay baby.” he whispered into my ear before kissing my hair. I looked up at him and he wiped the tears from my eyes. “So this is it? We’re just going to die?” He ignored what I said to him and instead, he leaned forward and kissed me hard and passionately. Our lips massaged and he caressed my face. My fingers ran through his hair as I pulled him deeper in the kiss. Tear drops from his eyes fell onto my nose, causing me to break from the kiss. I stared into his eyes. “I love you.” I said. “Don’t say your goodbyes. You’re going to survive this because you are strong. Don’t worry about me. If you make it out alive, I want you to forget about me. Think of me only as a distant memory. Don’t let the thought of me hold you back from getting the boy you always wanted.” By now, his voice was raised, trying to be heard over all of the screaming and distressed passengers. I ignored everyone around me and focused on Olly and I. I imagined it was an alternate universe and there was nothing but the two of us, in this very moment. I was scared. I tightened my grip on his hand. “I could never forget about you. You are everything I’ve ever wanted.” I said, tears falling from my eyes. He swallowed before wiping a tear from my face, and then wiping a tear from his face. “You are beautiful. Thank you for showing me that angels do exist. You are more than what I wanted.” Olly said. I blinked hard, letting the salt water wash from my eyes, as continuous sobs left my mouth. He touched my face and lifted it up so he could look me in the eyes. “Hey… I love you. I love you so much.” He cried, putting on a weak smile. “I love you too, Olly.” I sobbed. He grabbed my legs and lifted them onto his lap so that every part of my body was sitting on him, so he could nurse me and hold me in his arms one final time. “Happy one year anniversary, baby girl.” His hands made their way to my neck as he put a necklace around my neck. I looked down and it had a heart shaped locket pendant dangling off it. Engraved on the front was “forever”, and inside was a picture of the two of us. I looked at him and brought his face to mine, placing one last kiss on his lips. “Thank you. For everything. For being the other half of me.” I said to him. He wrapped his arms around my neck and I rested my head on his chest, as I slowly closed my eyes, ready to let myself go. He lifted my hand up to his lips, pressing a passionate kiss on the back. Everything started to fade away. The screaming passengers. The cries of the children. The sound of final kisses. The sound of people banging on things, trying to find a way out of this tragedy. The sound of the plane falling. The sound of our lives ending. “I love you…” I heard Olly’s voice say. I could vaguely feel him stroking my hair, and gently kissing my face, over and over again. I felt him take a deep breath before the force hit us. I felt his arms slowly release me, before everything turned black.
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a/n: i'm not even sure anyone reads this anymore lawlz in case anyone does then have a new chapter feedback would be nice and if not well i have nothing to say to you
dance with me tonight ~ chapter eleven
Olly watched on in amazement as she rhinestoned like a professional; he’d seen her and the other moms do it before but it never ceased to amaze him. It was typical dance parent to be stoning costumes the night before a competition or recital, after all, until the number went on stage, there was always work to be done.
After a while, she put the costume down and moved closer to Olly, holding onto his hand with hers, interlinking their fingers and giving him a small kiss on his cheek.
“What was that for?” He asked with a smile.
“No reason.” She shrugged. “I just felt like being affectionate.”
“Well by all means, continue.” He laughed.
As they watched their daughters’ rehearsal class, they remained oblivious to the other mothers’ conversations, and focused on the rehearsal. The routine was coming along nicely, and was pretty much ready for stage tomorrow, and though they never would admit it, just in case it was jinxed, they thought it could be a winning number.
That was, until, they zoned out and stopped looking for a second, being brought back to watching the girls by a near deafening scream from one of the studios, though it was yet unclear which one. A surge of panic ran through each parent in the gallery, wondering what was going on. Olly and Caroline looked into the studio where their girls were practicing and quickly realised it was in there the commotion had started. Very quickly, Nina was signalling for Olly to come down, and he did so, moving faster than he’d ever done before. He flung open the door and soon realised it was Lily who had let out the scream, his daughter who was in pain, his daughter who was hurt. He ran towards her and crouched down beside her, trying not to let his panic show in front of her, knowing it would only freak her out further.
“Baby, what happened?” He asked, trying to calm his tone. He could see that she was clutching at her ankle, and the worst possible situation flashed through his mind.
“I don’t know! Daddy it hurts!” She wailed as he pulled her into his chest. Her face was, by now, red and blotchy from the sobbing, and the pain wasn’t getting any easier.
“I know, sweetie. Shhh, it’ll be okay.” As he stroked her hair and tried to keep her calm, he took notice of the others in the room. “Charlie, can you tell me what happened?” He asked the young girl, hoping she saw.
“I don’t really know. We were rehearsing the group number and she was practicing her back tuck and I think she landed funny ‘cause she couldn’t get up afterwards. That’s all.” She explained with a shrug, her face the picture of worry. “Will she be okay?”
“I dunno, Char. Can you go tell your mom what happened? I gotta take her to the hospital; she won’t be dancing again tonight.” He asked of the nine year old.
“Sure.” As quick as Olly ran down the stairs of the gallery, Charlie ran up them to her mom.
“Hey, baby. What’s going on down there?” Caroline asked, as her daughter stood in front of her, readying herself to explain.
“Lily was doing a back tuck and she hurt herself. She’s holding her ankle and she’s crying and she can’t walk! Olly told me to tell you because he has to take her to the hospital. What do we do, mom?” She rushed out, near tears herself.
“Oh god.” She sighed; knowing just from her daughter’s explanation the injury was going to be a serious one. “You’re going to stay here and practice with the other girls, work on your solo.”
“But mom –“She began to whine, wanting to go with Lily and Olly. For once, she didn’t want to be in the dance studio; especially not when her best friend was laid up in the hospital.
“Charlotte.” Caroline warned sternly, using her full name to emphasise the warning.
“Fine.” She grumbled.
“We’re going to stay here. We’ll call a taxi after class and we’ll go the hospital then, okay?”
“Okay.” She nodded, walking with her mom back down the stairs and into the dance studio, where Olly was trying to coax his daughter into standing up.
“Lily, c’mon, can you at least try and stand up?” he asked his daughter with a sigh.
“Fine!” She exclaimed, transferring her weight onto her father in order to stand up. As she did so, the pain in her ankle caused her to let out another scream and sob even harder. “Daddy! It hurts!”
“Okay, okay. Calm down. Come here.” He readjusted his arms and lifted his daughter into them, carrying her out to his car and preparing to drive her to the hospital.
“I’m sorry, Caz.” Olly apologised as he looked to her and a vulnerable looking Charlotte, who’d followed them to the parking lot to help him out and to see them off.
“Don’t be sorry, Ols. Lily comes first, just get her to the hospital and get that foot sorted.” She smiled sadly, pressing a quick kiss to his lips and squeezing his hand in reassurance. “We’ll get a taxi when we’re done here and come to the hospital.”
“Thanks. Lily will really appreciate it.”
“No problem.”
By this point, both young girls were in tears, Lily’s cries of pain and Charlie’s cries of worry for her best friend. She sat in the back seat with Lily for a moment whilst their parents exchanged words privately, hugging her tightly and trying to do her best to convince the older girl she’d be okay.
“What if I can never dance again?” Lily sniffed, her eyes shining with tears and the worry more than evident across her face.
“Don’t say that!” Charlie scolded, though even she knew it could be a possibility. When a dancer was injured, seriously injured, like Lily clearly was, they always worried it would stop them dancing. A break in the wrong place could end a career before it had even begun.
“But what if I can’t?”
“You’ll dance again, don’t worry. I promise. I pinkie promise that you’ll dance again” And with that, the younger of the two girls held out her little finger on her right hand and linked it with the left of her best friend’s, signifying the promise.
“I’m sorry.” Lily apologised to her best friend, though the younger one knew not why.
“Why are you sorry? You didn’t do anything wrong, you just landed funny. What have you got to be sorry about?” She asked in confusion.
“Because now we can’t do our duet and I know you really wanted to do it.”
“Yeah, but not as much as I want you to get better. Once your foot is all healed up, we can do the duet then. I could ask Nina to pull it; I have a solo and a trio to do anyway, so I’m not missing out on much. Or I could do my duet with Chloe. Or we could give our duet spot to someone else, there are loads of things we can do. Don’t worry about it.”
The younger of the two girls hugged her best friend as her mother told her she needed to get back into practice, and promised she’d come by the hospital after class. They wiped each other’s tears and hugged a final time before they parted and Lily was driven to the hospital.
***
The rest of class was spent re-blocking the group routine for tomorrow’s competition, taking out Lily’s parts or giving them to other kids in the group, Nina even contemplated bringing in a girl from another group at the studio, but figured it was best to split it between the girls that were left instead of springing a whole new routine on a young girl the day before competition. For that reasoning, too, she decided to pull the duet Charlie and Lily were intending on competing, and have them compete it another time. Charlie had enough to be doing this week anyway, and it was probably best she didn’t compete in a duet, too.
When class was over, Caroline took Charlie to see her best friend in the hospital, just as she had promised. When they arrived, the younger girl ran straight towards her best friend, who looked helpless with her ankle all taped up and resting on a pillow for the moment, awaiting the results of her x-ray. The two girls embraced over the side of the bed, before Lily scooted over as far as she could to allow room for the younger girl to join her, who was mindful of her ankle. They chatted for a while, whilst their parents sat at the side of the bed enjoying their own conversation.
“What did the doctors say?” Caroline inquired, figuring they’d have some kind of information at this point.
“They took her for an x-ray, and we’re still waiting to hear back on the results. They iced it for a while, before they taped it up. She’s staying off it until we know more.” Olly explained.
“Poor girl, this is the last thing she needed.” She sighed, looking over at the 11 year old in sympathy.
“Oh, I know. She’s so upset she can’t compete tomorrow, that’s all she’s worried about. Since we got here, all she’s talked about is the team and dance.” He laughed sadly at the memory of the previous hour with his daughter. “She’s a natural born worrier, that one.”
At that moment, the doctor who had been seeing to Lily’s injury walked into the room with a large brown envelope that they assumed contained her x-rays.
“Hi,” The young doctor greeted, noticing the two new additions. “You must be Lily’s mother. I’m Doctor Andrews.”
“Oh, no, I’m not – I’m just a family friend. Never mind.” She shook her head, not knowing quite what to say in response.
“What’s wrong with my ankle?” Lily piped up from the bed, as her doctor placed the x-rays onto the viewing screen next to her.
“Well, Lily, it looks like you were very lucky on that front. The bad news is that you have fractured your ankle, and will not be able to put any sort of weight on it for the next six weeks or so.” She stated, pointing out the fracture on the x-ray.
“Six weeks!?” The two girls exclaimed from the bed in sync with each other. “But what about dance?” Lily continued, her face dropping as the doctor explained her situation.
“She dances competitively, and trains a lot every week. As you can see, she’s anxious to get back to it. She has a competition tomorrow.” Olly explained to the young professional.
“You definitely won’t be competing tomorrow, Lily, I’m sorry. You won’t be dancing for at least six weeks, possibly more. It all depends on you and your healing process.” With that, Lily buried herself into her best friend, who hugged her tightly and let her express her upset and frustration. “We’ll put you in a plaster for today, and keep you in overnight. You’ll need to make an appointment with the fracture clinic for about four weeks’ time, and they’ll assess you from there. You’ll need to go to them every other week; at least, to have some more x-rays to check how you’re recovering. In about six weeks, they’ll replace your plaster with a removable boot, or a lighter plaster, depending on how well you’re recovering. That being said, they could assess you in four weeks’ time and decide you’re recovered enough to wear the boot, or maybe go back to dance. It all depends how well you stick to the rules and how soon the bone recovers.”
“Thank you, Doctor Andrews.” Olly nodded with a smile.
“Not a problem. If you have any questions, feel free to give us a call.”
And so for the rest of the night (or at least until the two young girls fell asleep), Caroline and Charlie stayed right where they were. Lily had her ankle plastered up, made her appointment with the fracture clinic, and begged to be allowed to go home in time for the competition. They came to an agreement that she would be allowed to leave early tomorrow morning, in time to make the competition. Though she wouldn’t be allowed to dance, she wanted to support her teammates, her friends, her sisters.
And that she did. The entire weekend, she cheered her teammates from the audience, congratulated them on their placements, helped them with their hair and make-up, and doing anything she possibly could to help out. She may not be able to dance, but she was by no means going to quit completely.
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You dont bring me flowers...
She smiled as the doorbell rang and she jumped over the back of the couch and slipping on the wooden floor. She swung it open and her heart dropped when it wasn’t what she was expecting.
“Oh hi Jo.” She said her dissappointment clearly showing.
“am hello to you too!” she said dropping her handbag and walking in.
“Sorry I was expecti… no nothing.” She shook her head. “Tea?” she walked towards the kitchen.
“So he didn’t come?” she asked sitting at the table.
“Huh…who?” she smiled and tried to play innocently.
“Don’t try that Liney! I’m surprised he didn’t come too. But its almost ten, you’ll have to go soon.”
“I know. Ill make tea and then I’ll head to the studio. I don’t know I just thought…” she shrugged.
“Hey is he even in the country?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Ok go get dressed! I’ll make the tea.” She said standing up and throwing off her scarf.
She dragged her feet to her bedroom and started pulling on clothes that would be comfortable for the day of rehearsing. She looked down at her phone wondering if she’d missed it. This was the first week of live shows since she’d taken the job that he didn’t arrive with a huge bunch of flowers for her and a drive to the studio. He hadnt even rung her all week singing stupid songs. This was the strangest it had felt since he’d left the job.
You Don't Bring Me Flowers
You don't sing me love songs
“Ya look Caz I should really go I have to see mom and Louie before the plane…”
“oh don’t worry I understand! Good to talk to you.”
“Ya! Lets not leave it so long next time ya?”
“we’ll don’t leave the country for so long next time.” She said half joking.
“I’ll just have to make sure to ring you sooner when I get back.”
“You better Mr.”
She stared at the phone for a few minutes after they hung up. He’d been back in london two weeks and she hadnt seen him at all. That was happening more and more.
You hardly talk to me anymore
When you come through the door
At the end of the day
She thought back to the times when he’d come straight to hers from the airport to catch up. He’d crash on her couch for a few hours telling her every little detail from the few days he’d been away. Every evening he had off he’d text her first. Wanting to spend as much time as he could with her, free hours were spent curled up together on some couch, walks were taken holding hand. He’d ring her from the airport before he left just to remind her when he’d be back, and tell her he’d miss her.
I remember when
You couldn't wait to love me
Used to hate to leave me
“I did miss you darling.” He smiled and kissed her forehead.
“Do you really have to go?”
“I’m afraid so! I’ll say goodbye to Gary and I’ll have to head off with Sarah.”
“It was great catching up. Thanks for listening!” she squeezed his hand.
“Hey anytime. You sure you’re feeling alright?”
“yeah of course.”
“Good! I better go.” He grinned and walked away.
Now after lovin' me late at night
When it's good for you
And you're feeling alright
Well you just roll over
And you turn out the light
She greeted everyone in the studio, and walked down towards her dressing room. She sat on the couch alone until her makeup artist walked in.
”hello love!” she smiled and put her bag down on the dressing table.
”Hey.”
“What still no flowers?” Gemma said looking around.
“Nope. No flowers.”
“What Jack out of money?”
“Oh they werent Jack! That was always Olly. But he hasn’t sent any this year…”
And You Don't Bring Me Flowers anymore
She sat running her fingers round and around the skin on the back of his hand. He was texting and she was waiting for him to be finished.
“Sorry Sarah gets worried when I don’t text back.” He laughed.
“that’s ok.” He wrapped an arm around her back and pulled her in to him, her hand moved from his hand to his leg. She loved these few hours before they were called for rehearsals but had to be in the building. They’d just sit and chat about everything and nothing.
“What do you think you’ll be doing five years from right now.”
“Five years?” he said looking up at the ceiling.
“Yeah. You’ll be what Thirty-three.”
“Hm I don’t know hopefully here with you doing the show again just after a world wide tour that went amazingly well, advertising my sixth album…”
“World domination!” she laughed.
“Yeah. I’d like to maybe have a toddler in here annoying us too, you know when I have to bring him work.”
“so you want to stilll be working here.”
“I want to still be working with you anyway! We’re not going to break up anytime soon are we.”
“Nah you’re stuck with me Murs.” She snuggled further into his arms.
It used to be so natural
To talk about forever
“We used to start over there though I always thought it was much more striking and you had...”
”Oh god if I hear that one more time!” her new partner groaned and put down his cards.
“Hear what?”
“How you used to do it.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t even notice I was doing that.” She smiled and rubbed his arm.
“It’s ok I know it’s all a bit strange.” He nodded and went over for a drink.
“Look Carrie, we need to change it up.” Her friend and boss came over. “We have to leave how it used to be its time for change.”
But 'used to be's' don't count anymore
They just lay on the floor
'Til we sweep them away
She folded the napkin into a little boat and pushed it across the table.
“That’s so darling Caroline.” Her mother smiled at her. “But I thought I brought an adult out to dinner.”
“Sorry bad habit.” She unfolded it grinning. It had taken him three days to teach her to do that right. She was never that good with her hands, but he’d been so patient with her and just laughed when she messed up, like with everything hed been so patient with her, as she with him. It was easy to to eavch other about everything.
And baby, I remember
All the things you taught me
He’d really brought her around, when she’d met him she’d still been a mess from her last breakup. She’d been so mistrusting and closed, and he’d managed to crack her open and get her back in high spirits. A simple text from him could draw a smile right across her face. She’d even let him see her when she broke down after all the media mess. Besides her sister and mother, he was the only person in her life she’d let see her cry. She hadnt even been embarrassed, she’d liked that they were so close.
I learned how to laugh
And I learned how to cry
“Flacky Flacky nice to have you backy!” Keith Lemon grinned and pointed two fingers at her.
“Hey!” she laughed at him.
“Back again. You must love me!”
“Yeah that’s it!” she nodded.
“Well it’s not like you’re advertising a telly show on telly or anything.”
“no no.”
“So we’ve the final next week!”
“We do.” She nodded. “It’s all really exciting.”
“Whos going to win?”
“I don’t know! I’ve told you before it’s not fixed!”
“But who do you think is going to win.”
“I don’t know. I don’t have an opinion.” She grinned. Keith realising there was no way he’d get more out of her moved on.
“You must be very excited though, lover boy is back!” he grinned.
“Ooooh yes!” Holly chimed in. her heart jumped slightly but she strived to keep a straight face.
“What who? If this is another underage joke Kei…”
“no no No!” Holly pointed at her. “Mr Murs is a guest isnt he!”
“Oh Olly yes!” she grinned. “I’ve missed him.”
“cause you looooove him!” the host goaded.
“What no!”
Well I learned how to love
Even learned how to lie
They sat at the bar in silence, looking at each other. He reached across for her hand but she pulled away. Looking back up into his eyes she tried to stand up and walk away. But she couldn’t there was no way.
“You were gone for so long. I thought you’d left me.”
You'd think I could learn
How to tell you goodbye
She walked down the stairs, the button up shirt not warm enough for the december weather. Getting to the kitchen she stopped and smiled.
'Cause You Don't Bring Me Flowers anymore
The table was overflowing with daisies.
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Past and Present
Ive never written a fan fiction before but this has been a recurring dream for weeks. Its a lot longer than I thought it would be. I hope you enjoy it
Driving over to the X Factor studios he felt a mixture of excitement, elation and dread. He hadn’t seen Caroline in weeks and was really excited to see her again. They had spoken nearly every day, him calming her down and re-assuring her that everything would be okay with Matt her new co-host. Every day there seemed to be more and more posts about how much their fans wanted Olly back and how Matt would never replace him.
Caroline was finding this hard to deal with. She missed Olly but wanted the show to do well and Matt was funny and the complete opposite to Olly. Surely the fans would see that she would never fancy Matt.
He was really looking forward to seeing the crew again and to perform Hand on Heart on the main show. But he was also dreading it. He missed the show, missed the crew, but most of all he missed Caroline. He knew that hanging about the studio all day was going to be hard, sitting watching Caroline and Matt rehearse and not be part of it.
His mind drifted back to 2011 and he wondered how they had ended up where they were. It could so easily have gone down a different route.
They had clicked from the moment they had met. They both felt it, little did they know that this was the first day of a life long closeness that no-one was ever going to be able to break. He had taken her out to dinner that night to get to know her better and they had chatted and chatted and before they knew it they were the only ones left in the restaurant with the waiters hovering not wanting to interrupt them but desperate to close up.
Olly had paid and as they stood up to leave, he took Carolines hand in his and led her out into the cool summer night. It felt natural to hold her hand and she hadnt objected. They walked for a bit, still chatting. They realised that they were close to the hotel so decided to take a short cut through the park. As they strolled through, Olly felt Caroline shiver and as neither had jackets he put his arm round her shoulder and pulled him into her. She put her arm round his waist and the two continued to stroll and chat and felt totally comfortable in each others arms.
When they reached the hotel, Olly walked Caroline to her room and pulled her in to give her a huge hug and a kiss on the forehead. They told each other how much they had enjoyed the evening and that they had felt like they had known each other for years. Olly reluctantly said good night and headed to his room. Over the next few weeks they became closer and closer and Olly could feel himself starting to fall for her.
After a weekend of filming the London auditions, they were both beyond tired and Caroline offered for Olly to stay with her rather than drive all the way back to Essex. He wasn’t sure he could trust himself alone with her but was too tired and gratefully took up the offer.
Inside Caroline’s flat, she made them a cup of tea and sat down on the sofa beside Olly tucking her feet under her bottom and leaning in against him. His arm made its way round her shoulders and she snuggled into him. They fitted together, never needed any words between them but both found great comfort in each other, just happy to be together and to feel the warmth of the others arms around them.
They talked about the day and the forthcoming bootcamp in a few weeks time. The subject had changed and they started talking about how great it was that they had been put together and that they would never have expected to feel such a strong connection with someone so quickly. Olly knew that if he was going to tell Caroline how he felt, he needed to do it now.
“Caz” she lifted her head to face him, he could feel her breath on his face.
Deciding that actions spoke louder than words, he leaned in towards her. He stopped tiny inches away from her to see if she would back off – she didn’t. He leaned in and brushed her lips with his, he pulled away slightly, her eyes were still closed. He leaned in again and this time kissed her properly, Caroline responded by kissing him back just as eagerly, her hand coming up to rest behind his neck, pulling him even closer. Ollys hand slipped round her waist and he felt Caroline arch her back to be as close to him as possible.
They pulled apart and smiled at each other
“So”
“So”
Caroline stood up and took Ollys hand and led him up to the bedroom.
The next few weeks passed in a cloud of bliss for them. They spent all the time they could together, keeping their relationship a secret and snatching moments together in the studio when they thought they weren’t being watched. They had been caught a couple of times but had managed to brush it off. Even though the crew suspected they were together and teased them all the time, they always insisted they were just friends.
Then came Judges Houses in Greece. They had had a great time and the sun just made their passion for each other more intense. Olly would sneak into Caroline’s room at night and they just couldn’t get enough of each other. On the second last night they had gone for a walk along the beach. They had thought they were alone and as they paddled their feet in the water, Caroline cuddled into Olly and he wrapped his arms around her and they stood holding and kissing each other under the moon light. But they had been spotted by the producers and the following morning were called for a meeting.
The producer told them that he was concerned that if they were in a relationship and things went wrong between them that this would filter over into the show and it would be a disaster. He asked them to hold off getting any deeper until after the show. When they had argued, he had reminded them about their contracts which clearly stated that they must not get into any romantic relationship with any member of the crew or contestants during the show.
They had been gutted and headed back to Caroline’s room in total disbelief and shock. As soon as they were in the room Caroline burst into tears. Olly couldnt console her as he was so upset himself. They had to pick themselves up and get through the days filming which they were determined to do with huge smiles to show their professionalism. At the end of the day, they escaped back to Caroline’s room with a knowing look from the Producer. Olly told him they needed to talk but understood, just to give them this one last night.
They had talked and talked but at the end of the day, knew that the producer was right. Olly was also worried about him being away so much touring and worried that the pressure of never being around would put too much pressure on their relationship. It was the most heartbreaking decision they had ever had to make but they knew it was the right one – for now.
They made love to each other with so much passion, exploring every inch of each others bodies, making love to the other so slowly and tenderly, never wanting to let each other go. Afterwards they lay in each others arms trying to stay awake to not waste a single moment together but in the end, sleep took over and they woke in the morning with the sun streaming through the shutters. For a few seconds, they were still in their blissful bubble, until the cold realisation of what they needed to do seeped in. Olly leaned over Caroline and kissed her gently, then more passionately and they had made love again for the last time before they had to say goodbye.
They had agreed never to talk about it as it was too painful and that maybe just maybe sometime in the future, it would be the right place the right time for them but for now it wasn’t their time.
It had been difficult but they had managed to move themselves from lovers to best friends and their friendship had deepened to a whole new level.
Now here he was two years later, heading back to the studios to watch her doing what she did best but not with him, with Matt. He felt unbelievably jealous and had no right. It was his decision to leave the show, his music would always take priority.
Walking into the studios, he spotted her and she instantly felt his gaze upon her. She knew he was coming and was just as excited to see him. She squealed and ran over to him, throwing her arms around his neck, he scooped her up and wrapped his arms around her and she snuggled her head into his chest. He wanted to kiss her but resisted the temptation. She still had that hold over him, no matter how hard he tried to deny it.
He said his hellos to the crew, went through his sound check for the main show and then the producers of Xtra wanted a word with him, they had something special planned and wanted to make sure he was up for it. When they explained what they wanted to do, Olly looked at Caroline and Matt and they were both smiling. “yeah, sure, that will be great”
He sang “Hand on Heart” on the main show. He could see Caroline standing to the side watching him and he couldn’t help but sing it to her. How could he not. He had written the song for her. When the writers had shown him their ideas he had loved it and as the words took shape to the song, he had thought about her the whole time. She was going through a hard time at the time, struggling to believe in herself and doubting everything about herself, her appearance, her weight, her ability to do her job, her ability to get a boyfriend. He wanted her to know how much she meant to him and that he would always be there for her no matter what. That she had a piece of his heart and she was forever part of his.
He could see her crying as she stood watching him and it was all he could do to not walk over to her and take her in his arms. Dermot and the judges gave him the usual congratulations and then he was off. He found her in her dressing room.
“You ok darling”
“Yeah im fine, that song gets me every time, you sang it beautifully”
“Are you ready for Xtra”
“yeah I think so”
“Cmon on, we better get ready”
As the Xtra music started Caroline and Matt were standing behind the screen. The doors started opening, and they both waved to the Audience. This was Olly’s cue. He got a hold of Matts arms and hauled him off the stage. Caroline’s hand flew to her face in shock. Olly jumped onto the stage between the doors and pulled Caroline into a hug. The audience went wild as they knew they would. Caroline’s face grew into a massive smile. The screams from the audience where deafening but Olly whispered to Caroline “im going to kiss you”. He leaned in to her and she didn’t object. He placed a kiss on her lips, a long lingering kiss and she kissed him back. He almost forgot where he was but they heard the producer in their ears “eh ok guys, I think they get the message”.
They pulled away from each other with massive smiles on their faces and Olly took her hand and led her down the steps.
“Welcome to the Xtra factor” more and more screams.
“but Olly what are you doing here and what have you done to Matt”
“Oh Caroline, I was watching you and Matt rehearse all day and I realised that Ive missed the show so much. I miss the show, I miss the contestants, I miss the judges, I miss the crew but most of all I miss you and I want to come back”
“Oh Ols, it would be great to have you back, but aren’t you forgetting something”
“What”
“oh lets see a tour with 1d In Japan in a weeks time, then three weeks in Australia. Ols you cant do to it, your too busy”
Olly drops his head in disappointment “Oh”
“Oh Ols come here you” the audience are again going wild, shouting stay stay stay and Carolly Carolly Carolly
Caroline wraps her arms around him and gives him a cuddle as Matt slowly sidles up to them.
“eh Ols I think you need to apologise to Matt”
Olly turns to matt “yeah Sorry mate”
“No Worries”
Olly goes to head off the stage.
Caroline gets ready to say “oh everyone give it up for Olly Murs” when Matt cuts in with a totally unscripted line which throws both Caroline and Olly
“Oh Olly”
“eh Yeah” Olly stops and turns round
“eh I think you have more of Caroline’s lipstick on than she does”
Caroline and Olly blush. Olly not knowing what to do quickly thinks on his feet.
“Oh do I, well I suppose I had better give her it back then”
Caroline looks confused and scared as Olly walks up to her, takes her in his arms and plants a huge long kiss on her lips.
Matt is speechless. The audience are going crazy.
The judges are on their feet. Gary is shouting “yes, cmon”. Nicole “you guys, you are so cute, why are you guys not together” Louis “they were together, they were together” Sharon “oh just get married you two, you know you want to “
Olly winks at Caroline, then winks at the audience and walks off. Caroline is left blushing, flustered and unable to think. Matt rescues the situation by going to an ad break.
They are teased relentlessly throughout the rest of the show and finally its time to go home.
Olly offers to drive Caroline back to her flat. They find themselves on the same sofa where everything had started two years ago.
“Here we are again”
“I know but nothings really changed”
“Everythings changed Ols. We know how we feel about each other, but we are not together, why Ols”
“Im never here Caroline, that’s not changed. Im still scared that there would be too much pressure on us and Im not willing to lose you Caroline. I cant lose you. You mean way too much to me”
“so we carry on denying how we feel about each other”
“we’re not denying it Caroline, we just cant act on it, not yet”
“so Jack and Francesca, where do they fit in. I care about Jack Olly, I love him actually, he is a lovely person and a great guy and I love spending time with him, but Im not in love with him. I didn’t ask for him to come into my life, he just did and Im enjoying it, but I know I can never be in love with him because I am already in love with you”. Tears were now streaming down her face.
Olly swept them away with his fingers. “I know Caroline, I feel the same. I didn’t expect to find Frankie, she is a friend of my mates girlfriend and I was introduced to her at V last year. She was always around in the crowd, shes fun, shes lovely, we have a laugh and its nice to have someone to come home to, you know. She doesn’t ask for anything. She worries about our friendship I know that but she doesn’t push. We had a great holiday in Dubai but I know she is not The One. You’re the One Caroline but I need a few more years building my career before I can take my foot of the pedal. I don’t know if you can wait that long for me and Im not going to ask you to. If you meet someone that sweeps you off your feet before I can settle down, then more fool me. I love you Caz I love you too much to hurt you.”
They sat in silence on the sofa, wrapped in each others arms , just enjoying the moment and the closeness. Enjoying the feel of each other before Olly would have to leave to go home. It was heartbreaking, they both knew the other would be easily led to the bedroom but the guilt afterwards would be too much to bear. They had other partners for the time being and neither were the type of person to cheat.
For the moment, they had their deep deep friendship and no one was ever going to take that away.
Who knew what the future would bring.
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making a mountain out of a mole hill
it's rubbish ino, im thirteen and dont write dont kill me im trying
The days were long, the hours were short. Every opportunity they got they were together, inseparable. A secret relationship that had magically stayed secret, people had always thought they were together but never actually believed it was real. No one knew about their secret meetings and how often they saw each other, everyone just thought they went months without even talking. As soon as Olly was in the uk he was over at Caroline’s, he basically lived there. It all had to change soon though, a surprise that none of them were expecting, none of them were even ready for.
She sat on the toilet lid staring at the two lines on the small contraption; she couldn’t take it in, was it real or was she in a dream, a ridiculous dream that had no possibility of being true. She stroked her smooth, tanned stomach, not even I tiny bump, it just couldn’t be real. One careless night of desperation and it had happened, one night of lust and passion that had been building up inside the two of them for time. He had just come back from tour, not seeing caroline for the whole of that time. She couldn’t wait to get her hands all over him, to be reacquainted with every single part of his body. They thought they could risk it, get away lucky, they had done it before and they could do it again. Olly was away doing radio interview so she just sat silently upon the cold, hard seat of the toilet. She didn’t know what to feel or what to do. She just sat there for about 2 hours, staring into the distance, not really thinking at all, just staring.
He returned to the house to find a ghostly white Caroline sat crossed legged on the toilet seat. Immediately he scooped her up and carried her to the bed, fear taking over his body, what was wrong, was she ill, hurt or just sad. He held her close and she continued to just stare into space. After about five minutes had passed she turned to face him, tears streaming down her face.
‘I’m pregnant’
His face transformed into a cheshire grin, he felt like screaming to the world, his heart felt like it was going to jump out his chest, tears were now streaming down his face, but not how Caroline’s did. This time it was happiness, the happiest he had felt in his whole life, the girl of his dreams was carrying his child. She started smiling then started laughing, all the fear of olly not wanting the child, beacuase he was either to busy, or just not wanting a child with her had been forgotten. Her heart swelled as she thought about how in nine months’ time and tiny little baby would be brought into the world. Her baby. Their baby.
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"I promise"
fluffy fanfic for you all:-) They stood face to face, her nose touching his. He had one hand on her waist, the other near her face, pushing strands of hair out of her face. Her hands rested on his chest, which was practically touching hers. They stood in the moonlight near the pool in Gary's house in Florida. "Can I kiss you?" He whispered. She didn't reply, her heart bounding and her warm breath hitting Olly's lips. He waited a few seconds and since she had no protested, he kissed her. He kissed her passionately on her lips, his arms pulling her closer to his body. They broke apart after a few seconds, both of them breathing heavily. "I can't do this" Caroline whispered as she gently tried to push Olly's chest, but he kept his grip of her. "Why Caz?" "I just can't Ols, I'm sorry I can't." She broke away from his grasp and walked off. He rubbed his forehead as he watched her, thinking of the best way to approach the situation. He sighed. He knew he had to do something to fix them. They were both confused, were they just friends? Or were they more? Did Caroline even want to be more than friends? They needed fixing. Olly left it a short while before he went and found Caroline. He found her sitting on the balcony in the night air on the swinging chair. He stood back and watched her sitting there for a few seconds and took a deep breath before opening his mouth. "Caz" he said, almost regretting his words after he said them. She turned around quickly and looked at Olly, despite knowing exactly who it was, he's the only person to have called her that. She made eye contact with him for a few seconds, and placed her head back on the chair, looking out into darkness. He sat beside her, not too close but close enough. They sat in silence for a few minutes before he noticed Caroline had goosebumps and was rubbing her arms for warmth. She noticed him turning his head to look at her, and she looked at him. He gestured to his lap, where she went and sat and rested her head on his chest. He tucked her into his big wooly cardigan, placing a kiss on her head. "It's quite cold here in the night" he whispered to her, looking down at her face with love in his eyes. "I know" she mumbled. "Thanks for letting me share your cardi." She looked up at him and smiled before placing her head on his chest. "It's okay darling" he replied with a smile. "Caz we need to talk. Look, I like you. And I know you don't wear your heart on your sleeve but I do. And I really like you" Olly admitted. She remained silent, waiting for him to finish what he wanted to say. "I know you Caroline, you're afraid of being hurt. But you can't see that I'm head of heels for you" he laughed. "I want to be with you Caroline, you just need to open up to me. I know it's not as easy as it sounds but please try. I'll give you everything I can, and that's a promise. I want you to be part of my life, of my future, and not just as my best friend. Caroline please just let me in, you're so protective over your feelings but I'm not going to hurt you.." He whispered, almost getting a little emotional. She sat up on his lap and looked at him, she smiled softly. "I do like you Ols, you know that" she whispered, looking down and fiddling with the buttons of his cardigan. "It's simple then. I like you, you like me. You don't want to get hurt, I won't hurt you." He smiled, trying to persuade her. He leaned in a bit closer so their faces were almost touching. "Tell me you don't want to kiss me now" he joked. "I don't want to kiss you" she mumbled. "Mean it" he whispered. "I can't" she replied. "Kiss me then" Olly whispered, looking at her lips, as she placed her lips on his, moving her hands and placing them on his neck. "I'll give us a try" she whispered, against his lips. "I won't even hurt you Caroline, I won't I promise" "Ols you're so cute" she giggled, placing her lips back on his.
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In love with your bestfriend
Hiiiyaaaa, let me know if ya like it and if you want a chapter 2 x Chapter 1- "Hey Ol's, what take away do you want?" Caroline asked Olly as they we're having a movie night "Ah I don't mind Caz it's up to you" Olly doesn't mind what ever caroline orders because when it comes too Olly and his food he'll eat anything "Olly, you always let me chose, so I decide its your turn to chose" "It's called being a gentleman?" "Just choose something" Caroline said as you chucked the takeaway menus at Olly "Hey" he got up and caroline wondered what he was doing?...suddenly Caroline was lifted off your feet being tickled and both ended up on the floor in fits of giggles "Olly" "Yes" he said as both Olly and Caroline were still on the floor facing each other "I'm hungry" "Me too" he said standing up and then helping Caroline up Finally after bickering about who's turn it is too chose what takeaway they were having, You finally ordered a pizza, Hawaiian Olly's favourite "So...Cazza what movie are we watching?" As the movie titles rolled "That would be telling now wouldn't it" caroline said. Caroline and Olly were both cuddled up on the sofa under a blanket, stuffing there faces with pizza "THE GOONIES" Olly shouted "Alright jeez Ol's, my ear" "Sorry, she'll I kiss it better?" "Yes" Caroline said as she pouted her face and pulled her best puppy dog face, he lent over and kissed Caroline's ear "Better?" "Much" they both laughed, Caroline loved nights like this lazing around her apartment with her best friend, Olly Murs just being Olly Caroline and Olly must've both fell asleep during the movie because it was the end of the movie and you don't even remember watching half of it "Olly, Olly, Ol's, OLIVER" "What!" he said just waking up "You've got to go, you've got a daybreak interview tomorrow morning and its now gone 11pm" "Oh god, I forgot, look I better go" "Okay" olly and caroline both got up and she went too see Olly out "Bye darlin'" he said as he gave caroline a kiss on the cheek "Bye Ol's" she shut the door The next morning caroline woke up extra early too watch Olly on daybreak, "Well there's this one girl, but were just friends" Olly wasn't thinking he didn't think Caroline was actually watching Caroline ran that around her mind for a while before it hit you, did Olly 'like' you? "Hey Caz!, just popped in to get my phone which I left here" She put her thoughts to the back of her mind and went downstairs still in her pyjamas "Oh hey Ol's, yeah it's over there, got it?" "Yeah, thanks" "Good, good" "Yeah" this conversation just got a little awkward "So..." "So?" Caroline grabbed Olly's arm and led him to the sofa "look Olly, well I don't know how to put this but, oh urhm, oh I'm just being silly, it's nothing, don't worry urhm go home, just go..." "Caz?" "Alright fine, I know you like me alright..." "What how'd...what? He stopped himself because he didn't want Caroline too actually find out that he had fallen deeply in love with her "Go Olly! Go I don't want too see you" with that caroline ran up too her room and shut the door and slid down it crying It was a good hour or two before Olly decided to go and find Caroline and when he did it broke his heart too hear his Caroline so upset and crying "Caz" he said almost in a whisper "Go away Olly" "No, I'm not going anywhere" "Well don't go anywhere, go home!" "Look it's true okay, I do, I do, I really really do like you more than a friend, in fact I love you so much it hurts!" It went silent for a couple of minuets, then Olly heard you unlock the door, you just walked straight into a hug and whispered "I'm sorry" "Hey, come here, it's alright" For the rest of the day Caroline and Olly just lazed around her apartment watching rubbish that was on tv, laughing at unfunny jokes and sharing cans of coke, and put today behind them not knowing it still bothered both of them "Bye Ol's" Caroline shut the door and went to bed, she had a headache and felt sick, she thought, she would sleep it off Caroline awoke in the middle of the night, feeling worse than before and got out of bed and went to the bathroom and ducked over the toilet to be sick She couldn't handle this anymore you called Olly "Ol..l..y?" "Yes darlin'?" He said in a sleepy voice "I need yo..u" straight away Olly jumped out of bed, put some jeans on and a top and put a trilby on his head "It's alright babe, I'll be there soon, just hang on okay" he speeded down the motorway, finally after about a half hour drive he was at Caroline's on her door step She practically fell in to his arms "Olly..." "Shhh shhh, it's okay I'm here, shhh shhh" he said as he dropped a few kisses on your forehead "Ol I'm gonna be sick..." Let's just say Caroline didn't make it to the bathroom and vomited all over her living room floor "It's okay, let it all out" Olly said rubbing her back, comforting her He laid caroline down on the sofa and went to clean up the mess on the floor By morning caroline and Olly were both under a duvet on the sofa all snuggled up with each other "Hey, Caz how ya feelin'?" Olly said in his cute essex accent "Much better, look listen Olly, thanks for coming last night" "It's okay, anything for my beautiful best friend" she smiled at Olly with her pale looking face that Olly noticed "Come on we're going out, you need some fresh air" Olly said "Ugh I don't want to" "Come on I'll carry you if I need too" "Yeah that'll be a good one for the papers won't it" "Come on" he took Caroline's hand and led them out side and caroline and Olly both took a long walk through the park, even though it was winter and it was freezing outside but it didn't matter Olly kept caroline nice and warm
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Posts this just then to only have the people in the group chat read it. But it was writing itself in my head so there we go
Circles, carolly rpf
It was funny how this kept happening. How life went around in circles. Here she was, another series of Love Island over, another year done, until January this time at least. It seemed like another lifetime ago that it had all began. She had been doing X Factor during the first series. Had just finished Strictly, had just split with Jack. A whole different lifetime.
And now, a broken relationship, another secret one and a bunch of stuff the media had no idea about. Circles, it all went in circles.
Caroline stares out the taxi window as it winds through the streets of London, bringing her closer to home. The city evokes a warm glow inside her, it was her home, and there was nothing like being home, where your heart was happiest.
‘Here alright love?’
They have pulled up at an empty stop a few doors down from her house. Her car is in her spot, looking a bit dusty but thankfully with no parking tickets clasped to its windscreen.
‘Yeah, this is fine, thanks’
‘I’ll grab your case for you’
‘Thanks’
Caroline exits the car, takes her case from the driver, thanks him again and starts to search in her bag for her keys as walks to her house, pulling her case behind her.
Her phone beeps just as she is about to put the key in the lock. It’s from Lewis
‘Hey, should we meet up soon for another photo op? Hope your flight back was ok :)’
Caroline sighs and unlocks her door, depositing her case just inside, as it closes behind her and she sinks right down in front of it.
Rubbing her face with her hands, thinking about what to text Lewis, it takes her a minute to recognise the pattering of paws towards her.
‘Ruby!’ she screeches as her beloved dog jumps up on her, licking everywhere she can reach
‘How did you get there?’ she questions the dog before calling ‘Jo?’
‘No, not Jo’ and limping slightly from the kitchen comes Olly, grinning at her
‘Ols! You’re here’
Olly grabs her hands and pulls her to her feet and right into him, Ruby thudding slightly with the ungracious landing back to the parquet floor
‘Oh I’m so glad you’re here’ Caroline breathes deep, inhaling his scent, hugging him close
‘Are you ever going to let go so I can kiss you?’ Olly says with a laugh
‘Nu uh’ Caroline shakes her head against his chest ‘I’m gonna stay here forever’
‘Well’ Olly reaches his hand under her chin and lifts her face to his
She smiles at him and leans up for a kiss, his fingers running up and down her back, like he’s playing his favourite tune.
Circles, it all went in circles.
----
X Factor sat like a very heavy piece of furniture in her mind. It was hard to ignore and it was near impossible to move. You just had to put up and try and be as comfortable with it, as you could because it was there to stay.
It all felt like a well read book, she had gone over it so many times in her head. The time they had spent together during X Factor, it was a bubble, just the two of them. Of course they had ended up sleeping together, like there was any other option. The whole charade of X Factor was a tedious and woeful affair. They knew soon after starting that they never should have taken the job.
No one liked them, they were nothing but stressed and the whole world was watching, speculating on whether they were together or not. I mean, what else was there to do really? When the nation is ridiculing you and there’s only one other person in the whole world who understands it like you do, who is going through it like you are. A person who you had fancied for years, who you loved more than almost anyone, who had recently become single.
It had become almost like an addiction, a dependency. They couldn’t have got through X Factor without each other. Or the sex. A quickie in the morning, and later, a long drawn out glorious euphoria filled evening. It was escaping reality and yet Olly was the only real thing there was. Olly’s skin against hers, Olly’s body underneath her, above her, beside her. The kissing, the pleasure, the oblivion. It was a permanent dream, like a dream that you know is a dream but you can’t make yourself wake up from.
And then one day she was jolted awake. It was like being drenched in ice cold water, gasping for breath, reality and dreams snatched away so cruelly. There had been fights and two years of not speaking, an addict having no choice but to go cold turkey.
They had started talking again in the summer of the disastrous engagement. Texts, calls and voice notes. At first it was trivial stuff, how were their families, who was Olly liking on Love Island and so forward.
Sometime in the early days of winter Olly had called Caroline, when the only thing that preoccupied her day was playing with Ruby. He had mentioned it first, those days on X, how wrong it had all gone. With that phone call they had opened a floodgate, and they slowly began to knock down the walls they had built around themselves, keeping them apart from each other.
Their lives then had been so entwined back then, and it had been painful to untangle from each other. With them talking again, they started to tie themselves into knots once more. Easy knots, ones you can untie without much injury. It became easier this time, akin to how they used to be.
He had gotten funnier, or maybe he’d always been funny. Maybe she’d just forgotten in the long absence, that it hadn’t just been the sex that had been incredible. Back then she had called him her best friend and he was. She could talk to him about anything and they made each other laugh. All the stuff that mattered beyond mutual attraction.
But beside a quick meet up at an award show, they didn’t end up meeting in person until June the following year. Neither of them had meant for anything to happen. And yet
----
She’d never been a fan of hospitals, she didn’t suppose that many people were. There was a certain smell and everything squeaked. She hugs her present close to herself as she navigates through the labyrinth corridors, finally finding his room and knocking gently
‘Come in!’ comes the shout back and she pushed the door tentatively open
‘Caz! What an amazing surprise’
‘I-uh’
Caroline’s eyes travel from his heavily bandaged and elevated leg, to the drips in his arms and to his eager hopeful face, and without any warning at all, she burst into years
Olly, looking bemused but concerned, cast his gaze around as if there is any way of him getting up to help her
‘Caz, babe, it’s ok. It’s just fluids, and you know, my leg is fine, I’m fine, all fine, do you want to sit down maybe?’
‘I-ca, bel, I, no, you, and’ Caroline, still sobbing, gestures with her hands at him and at herself, coherence having been left firmly at the door
‘Please sit down darling, please’
Still sobbing and not making any sense, Caroline dumps her wrapped gift and card onto his tray table and sits on the edge of his bed, launching herself straight onto his chest and sobs more.
Olly gently puts his arms around her, trying not to dislodge anything as he rubs her back, and waits for her to stop
‘I’m sorry’ Caroline says after a while and she sits up and rubs her eyes with the back of her hands ‘I don’t know where that came from. I think it’s just the last time I properly saw you, we’d just broken up, and now you’re broken’
‘How very poetic’ Olly says with a slight smile, before adding quietly ‘I thought I’d never see you again at all’
‘Well that too’ Caroline says as she takes a big breath ‘not ever, it was horrendous’
‘Not one of my favourite memories ever either Caz. But you know why it happened’
‘Yeah, yeah’ she waves away this discussion with an impatient flap of her hand ‘we’ve talked about all that over the phone. It’s ancient history, there’s no need to go over it again’ she leans forward and runs her thumb across his cheek, as if he had tears there too ‘I just wanted to see how you were’
‘I’m fine, well’ Olly lets out a breath ‘I mean I’ve been better but this has helped, I’ve needed this op for a long time, no I’ve just got to recover from it. And then I’ll be fine. More than fine. I’m taking a break from it all Caz’
‘It all?’
‘That life, the showbiz crap, I’m going to spend time with the family, write music because I want to not because my contract says so, travel around’
‘So you’ve lots of free time to fill?’
‘Something like that, yeah’
‘Well then’
----
They had spent hours in that hospital room catching up on life. He loved his joke gift of a pack of Man United boxers, and they made plans to meet up soon. It was like last time, but not at all. It all happened fast but it felt natural, less intense. They kissed again for the first time in Olly’s garden after a sunny day and a barbeque. They slept together again for the first time that night, and for the second and third time. Olly’s knee was a bit of an issue. Caroline kept having to go on top, not that she minded.
Then there was the bigger issue of when he shaved all his hair off. She wasn’t used to his head yet. Before they had rekindled, she had had visions of her running her hands through his hair, and now there was nothing to run her hands through. She kept accidentally leaving nail indents in his shoulders from digging instead of gripping.
Beyond his knee and his lack of hair, came the bigger issue of privacy, so Caroline had talked to Nathan about Olly. He suggested she fake a relationship with a twenty something year old toyboy. It wouldn’t be hard for the press to shallow and her and Olly could conduct their relationship behind closed doors for as long as they could manage.
Now lying in bed with Olly, after the two had a lengthy and highly satisfying reunion, Caroline’s mind floats back to the text from Lewis
‘Penny for them?’ Olly says with a kiss to her head
‘Lewis texted earlier, wanting to meet up for a photo op’
‘And?’
‘It’s just tedious. I hate lying’
‘I know you do Caz, but it’s just easier isn’t it? The media think you’re hooking up with someone else and they leave us the fuck alone. And eventually when there’s some big news story taking over everything we’ll quietly post an Insta together and act like it’s completely normal while everyone freaks out’
Caroline smiles and curls into her boyfriend
‘And eventually it won’t be news at all’
‘Exactly my darling, exactly’
‘How long do you think we can keep it a secret?’
‘Well for however long I’m out of the spotlight’
‘You don’t even know how long that’ll be’
‘A while’ Olly shrugs ‘maybe we’ll be married with kids by the time I get back to it’
‘Olly!’
‘What?’ Olly says with a nervous laugh ‘is that not the plan?’
‘I suppose’
‘Love the enthusiasm Caz’
‘Oh shush you’ she smiles and pokes him in the side
Her insides are dancing, butterflies swooping and swirling. It was how she expected everything to happen after X. Marriage and babies, happily ever after. Afterwards she had chastised herself for being so dreamy. Now, well now, she lets out a happy sigh and squeezes Olly. Maybe it wasn’t circles after all, perhaps they’d just taken the scenic route, maybe there would be a few more bumps along the way. But they would end up just where they needed to be.
#carolly#carollyfic#carolly fanfiction#caroline and olly#fanfic stuff#i chose this over eating lunch#i have to leave the house in 6 minutes#yikesss
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Reality
(Let me know if you want this in separate parts or w/e)
"So Gary, have you decided who your guest judge is going to be?" Caroline and Matt were sitting in Gary's dressing room before Bootcamp got underway for another year. "I have actually, I think Olly Murs would be a great person to have." Caroline choked on her tea, just hearing that name made her shiver. The thought of seeing her best friend once again made her feel happy inside, a happiness she lost when Olly told her he wouldn't be returning to the Xtra Factor this year. "O-Olly?" "Yeah, I figured since he knows a lot that he'd be a great help." "Yeah, that makes sense. Isn't that great Caroline? Olly's coming back!" Caroline was miles away, thinking of Olly. "Caroline?" "Hmm? Oh, yeah, yeah it's great." she faked a smile, she didn't really know how to feel about Olly being at judges houses. Not after last time, all the speculations between them, wondering if there was something in their flirting or if it was nothing at all and they were being silly. "What's up?" "Nothing. I'm just tired, that's all." "Why not go for a lie down then?" "Yeah, I will." Caroline got up and left for her own dressing room. As she walked down the empty hallway, she started having flashbacks of the day her and Olly first met, till the very last Xtra Factor final they done together. It hurt her quite a bit really, meeting a guy who becomes your best friend in a matter of days and being with him everyday, talking to him everyday and then not having him next to you for support and never talking to him for days or weeks at a time? Yeah, it hurts. But she had to put on a brave face for the cameras and Matt, making sure no one suspected anything at all. Eventually she reached her dressing room, and for some reason, she looked to the door next to it, and saw the sign "Olly Murs" on it. It was his dressing room, she had been in that room many of times, all the laughter and tears she shed, they were all in that room. Memories. "Should I? No, Caroline, don't be so stupid. It'll just hurt more." she turned away from his door and went opened her own, a tear ran down her face as she done so. She missed him, she wished he were here, beside her doing the Xtra Factor, her support, her best friend...but he wasn't, and that was it. She dropped down onto the sofa in her dressing room and let a tear fall down her face and that's when she realised, that all of this? This was not a dream, this was reality.
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When Kirsten Met Olly
Kirst wants a Kirstolly fanfic so I’ll give it a try.
Kirst was waiting at the arena in Glasgow for Olly to come on the stage when all of a sudden, Sarah, Ollys manager came up to her in crowd and asked her to go backstage. Olly had spotted her in the audience and really wanted to meet her. Whilst she was backstage, having a conversation with him, they kissed, that led to sex, had babies, got married and lived happily ever after.
The end.
wow that escalated quickly.
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surprise, i finished earlier than expected and my mom's busy in the garden so i put off getting ready to finish this yay. hopefully will have a new chapter of DWMT for you soon, but for now, enjoy this! i don't own them etc. PLEASE let me know what you think. oh & katie made me write this :)
i'd give up forever to touch you ~ carolly rpf
When Olly finished his final show for Xtra Factor last December, he and the team were more emotional than the year before. He knew it was because everyone had pretty much gathered that he wouldn’t be coming back. It just wasn’t feasible for him, nor was it fair to Caroline to be leaving her alone until the live shows. He didn’t doubt she had the capability to present alone, lord knows she was a seasoned professional, much more so than he, but if you’re supposed to be co-hosting and your co-host doesn’t show up all summer, you’d be pretty angry too.
Many a night he’d spent in her hotel room, her flat, his flat, his hotel room, wherever they were that week, whichever was closest, holding her in his arms as she begged him not to leave the show, not to leave the crew, not to leave her. He’d promised he wasn’t leaving her, how could he, he adored her, but he needed to focus on his music this year. He’d visit as much as he could and of course he’d accept the mandatory performance slot reserved for the most successful of X Factor protégées, even if just to see her again, to be reunited with her on national television.
It was weird, on the first day of the next year’s auditions, seeing the tweets and the photos uploaded to her Instagram, and to his, knowing this was supposed to be his job, with his girl, and he’d been replaced. Matt seemed a nice enough guy, he’d never met him as of yet, he supposed he’d have to at some point, but he didn’t worry that he’d do a bad job. He was a newbie, like he was just two years ago, and Caroline had turned him into a presenter, he was sure she would do the same for Matt. Seeing her so happy around a new guy didn’t fail to tighten his chest, to widen the hole in his heart, but he knew he’d have to accept it. He shouldn’t be jealous, or at least not this jealous. And he definitely shouldn’t be worried that he was going to steal his girl.
She wasn’t his girl to start with.
***
As time wore on, he wouldn’t say he was used to his lack of job, nor the man who became his replacement, but he was more comfortable than the first day. He had to learn to accept the fact that Caroline loved her job and he couldn’t have expected her to leave with him. And he’d also had to learn to accept that of course, she was going to have a new co-host. They’d always said they would never present the show solo. Plus the fact co-hosting seemed to work so well for them (and for the ratings) why wouldn’t they continue the trend.
And then came the night before the official press launch of the show. For the last two years, he’d anticipated it because he had to attend the damn thing, and now he was anticipating it for the complete opposite reason. He wasn’t going, but Caroline would be. He’d have to admire from afar, hope everything worked out for her, and for Matt, and watch the show when it aired on Saturday with the rest of the nation. He’d sent her a good luck text that night, pleasantries aside, mostly because he wanted her to know he cared. He hadn’t expected to get a full blown conversation from it, but he wouldn’t be complaining when that was what happened.
Good luck tomorrow x
He didn’t expect a reply at all, let alone as fast as she did reply, but it didn’t stop the smile on his face when the reply came through almost immediately.
Message received
Caroline – 10:23pm
Thanks!! So nervous; wish u were gonna be there xx
You’ll do gr8, promise xx
Within two minutes of sending the text, his phone started to ring loudly.
“Hello?” He didn’t bother checking caller ID; he just pressed the green button almost instinctively, wondering who would be calling at this hour.
“Hey, it’s me.” she chirped happily as he answered.
“Hey, Caz.” He was sure she would pick up on his tone changing, but he couldn’t help the grin that stretched across his face at the sound of her voice. It had been far too long since they’d last spoken.
“I didn’t wake you up, did I?” She asked her voice changing pitch suddenly, feeling bad for having woken him.
“Nah, I was awake anyway. Plus I’ve always got time for you, 10pm or 10am, sleep can wait.”
“You’re so cheesy!” She laughed that ever so familiar dirty laugh of hers, and he wondered how it was possible that his grin only grew wider.
“Only for you, darling”
Their laughter continued for a minute or so, and for a moment Olly just listened to her laugh, even over the phone it managed to give him butterflies, and he felt like a teenager with a crush just hearing her voice.
“I really miss you, you know.” Caroline’s admission ended their laughter and brought on an awkward kind of silence for a moment as he processed what she just said. Sure, he missed her too, but something in the way she said it made it seem different.
“I miss you too, Caz.” He sighs after a minute, and realises by this point, it won’t matter what he says, so he tells her exactly how much he misses her. “God, I miss you more than I ever thought possible. I miss you, and the team, and the whole job, but mostly you.”
“It’s not the same without you, Olly.” She confesses with a sigh to match his, and she twiddles her hair around her finger like a teenage girl.
“Is Matt not working out for you, then?” He smirks, making a joke to lighten the awkward tension that had somehow settled between them.
“Stop it. Matt’s great. He’s funny and he’s doing a decent job with the show and he isn’t awful to be around but he’s not you.”
“And what’s so wrong with that? I thought that’s what you wanted?”
“It is. It was. I don’t know, Olly!” Her voice is getting higher in pitch and he starts to wonder if he can hear her throat drying out and the tears welling in her eyes.
“Hey, hey, calm down. It’s okay. I was just kidding. Listen, this is your job. You’re good at what you do. Don’t let me take away your talent.” He laughed at his own words. “I’m not gonna forget you because we don’t work together anymore. You’re my favourite girl, you know that.” He hopes the subtle reference to their days of working together will cheer her up, because he hates to see her, or hear her, upset. “Calm down and get some sleep. You have a big day tomorrow.”
“I wish it was you and me going to the launch.”
“I know me too.” He sighs almost sadly because it seems as though they’ll never get their time to be.
After a moment of silence, he can hear her relaxing herself and then comes her next question.
“Will you sing to me, Ols?”
“Sing? Why?”
“You’re a singer. That’s what singers do, isn’t it? Sing?”
“Well yeah, but why –“
“Don’t ask questions, Ols. Just sing, please. I need it.” She nearly pleads with him to get her way, but he doesn’t understand why. He’d do anything for her.
“Okay, my darling. You know I’d do anything for you.”
And so that night, to drift her to sleep, he sings to her over the phone, just as she asked. He’ll sing to her songs of love and heartbreak and of the nights they spent together, songs she suspected, but never really knew were about her. He’ll never tell her that, of course, he’ll continue to let her think that the ‘she’ or the ‘we’ he often sings about is not her, not them. But those are the songs that work for her, and mid-way through the second song, the line is silent on the other end and Olly falls asleep listening to her soft snores, reassured in the fact she got some sleep.
***
The launch would come, and she’d be asked a thousand questions about her ex co-host, and she’d give a thousand answers, all pretty much the same. She continually repeats that Matt is the opposite of Olly, and they are more like a brother/sister duo than a will they / won’t they couple that she and Olly were, and she’s slightly glad for this fact, because she’s not sure she’d have coped if Matt started flirting with her on his first day like Olly had done two years ago in that small hotel room.
She also tells the press there is no rivalry between Matt and Olly, she doesn’t think they’ve ever spoken properly, and her thoughts are confirmed in one of their interviews with god knows who (she’d stopped paying attention, all the interviews all seemed the same anyway), when Matt mentions he’s never been contacted by Olly and he’s okay with that fact.
She doesn’t know why she does it, but it’s then she decides to jump in and let the whole world know they spoke the previous night. It’s then she realises, two seconds later, that she looks too eager. Play it cool, Caroline, she’ll tell herself. It’s safe to say she refrains from mentioning that conversation again.
She answers the rest of the questions about Olly almost mechanically, giving nothing away but the fact that she missed him, but everyone knew that anyway. She assured everyone who got an interview that Matt was doing a great job, that the dynamic between them is much different, that of course she misses Olly, who wouldn’t, but they talk all the time and she’s sure he’ll be on the show at some point.
There, she thinks, much better. Now I don’t look so eager.
She wonders why she cares so much what the press make of her comments about Olly, but shrugs it off and continues with her day.
***
That night, she’s drunk as anything and she’s locked out of her flat when she gets her hands on her phone and calls the first person she can think of, her sister. It takes a minute and the sound of Jody’s answer phone for her to realise she was on holiday, and she hangs up with a sigh, thinking what to do next. She plonks herself down on the step outside her flat and looks at her phone with a pout, wondering why she didn’t have more friends local to her. When she noticed her wallpaper was set to a picture a fan tweeted to her of herself and Olly, she thought to call him. She wondered if he was even in the country, she didn’t know, but it was an excuse to talk to him, so she dialled his number and hoped for the best.
“Olly!” She cried happily when he did, in fact, answer his phone.
“Hey, Caz.” His sleep filled voice came from the other end and she almost felt guilty for obviously waking him up.
“I’m drunk.”
“I can tell.”
“I’m locked out.”
“You are?”
“I am.”
“You want me to pick you up?”
“Would you?” She almost wants to cry in her intoxicated state at the lengths he’d go to her for her.
“Course I would, you know I’d do anything for you. I’ll be there in 10. Don’t go anywhere.”
“Thanks Olls.”
And, as promised, he arrives within 10 minutes and she’s practically bouncing on the spot when he gets to her. He laughs and with a shake of his head, holds out his hands to pull her up and helps her into his car, buckling her up as she leans her head on the window next to her. She’s half asleep by the time he pulls up outside his place, and he figures it would be easier to carry her inside than to try and help her walk. He kicks the door shut behind them and carriers her into his room, placing her in the middle of his bed and she starts mumbling something as he puts her down. Her face starts to pale and before he has time to register what’s happening, she’s vomiting over him and his bed, but he isn’t angry.
How could he ever be angry with her?
He rubs her back and tells her to get it out; he’d rather soiled bed sheets than her choking in the middle of the night. They think she’s done after a minute or so, so he strips the sheets from his bed and helps her out of her clothes, putting them to one side and giving her one of his shirts to sleep in for the night before he lays her back down and strokes her hair softly to lull her to sleep. When he thinks she’s out for the night, he moves to get up from the bed, but he’s surprised when she pulls him by the wrist and pleads with him to stay with her.
“Stay with me, please?” She pouts with her eyes half closed and voice filled with sleep.
He sighs, but answers her plea. “Sure, Caz, whatever you want.” And with that, he lays himself down next to her, pulling her into his chest and returning to stroking her hair as he did before.
“Olly?” She squeaks a moment later, and he wonders what she’ll say next.
“Yeah?”
“I think I’m in love with you.”
He doesn’t know what to say to that.
He thinks she might mean it, even if she is drunk, and even if she did just vomit all over him, she’s laying there in his arms, in his bed, and telling him she’s in love with him.
What is he supposed to say to that?
“Say something, Ols.”
“I, um…” He can’t. He can’t because he’s waited for so long to hear her say those words and he wants nothing more than to tell her he loves her too, that they should just be, they’ve got no excuse now, so what’s stopping them? But how could he tell her that he feels the same if he’s not sure she even means what she says? She’s still pretty drunk, and it could just be the drink talking.
But to hell with it.
“I love you, too, Caz.” He drops a kiss on her head and links their hands together, and that’s how they stay for the rest of the night as she drifts into a peaceful slumber and he stays awake for just a little while longer to admire the sleeping beauty in front of him.
***
The next morning, he hates to wake her up, but he knows she’s got a radio show to do and if he doesn’t wake her up, she’ll miss it and that’ll invite all sorts of questions they don’t mean. He laughs as she groans at the sunlight peeking in through the blinds, before he gets up himself and heads into the kitchen, attempting to make her something to eat. A while later, as the bacon he found in his fridge is frying nicely and is nearly done, she makes her appearance. Still dressed in only his button down and a pair of his football socks she must’ve found lying around, her hair piled in a bun on the top of her head, he grins as she walks into the room, and she’s never looked more beautiful.
“Hey there, sleepy head.” He laughs as she groans some more and puts the bacon in the bread, putting the plate in front I of her and priding himself in making something without burning it.
“Ols, listen, I’m SO sorry about last night. I shouldn’t have called you or thrown up on you or your bed. I’m really sorry about that.”
“Hey, don’t be. It happens. They needed a wash anyway. One thing though…” he trails off and sucks in a breath, mustering up the courage to ask her if she really meant what she said last night. He has to know.
“Sure.”
“Did you really mean what you said last night? Are you really in love with me, or was that just the drink talking?”
She puts down her sandwich for a minute and gets up from her chair, walking over to his and sitting herself sideways onto his lap, and wrapping her arms around his neck, as though they were a couple that had spent the night together. “I meant it. And I still mean it. I love you. And I want to be with you. There’s nothing to stop us anymore.”
In that moment, he swears his heart could’ve exploded out of his chest.
He doesn’t waste any time, and as soon as she’s stopped talking, his lips are on hers, attacking them hungrily and with a passion she didn’t know existed within him. Two years of pent up feelings and frustrations were suddenly coming to light and they’d forgotten all about the fact that she had to be at Radio 1 in just about an hour.
“I have work.” She mumbled onto his lips between kisses, hating to be the responsible one.
“I know. I don’t care.” He replied, moving his lips to her cheek, her jaw, her neck. “How long have we got?”
“About an hour.” She breathed out, trying to hold onto any control that remained within her.
“Plenty of time.”
With that, the bacon was forgotten. Her legs were locked around his waist and her arms around his neck, her lips attached to his or to anything she could kiss within reach as he carried her back towards the bedroom, where he put her down and discarded himself of his shirt. Throwing it to one side, he crawled up the bed in one swift movement and back towards her, his lips quickly reattaching themselves to hers, as he fumbled with the buttons on her (his) shirt trying to open it as quickly as possible.
Eventually, he reached the final button and he pulled it open hastily, before pulling the garment from her tiny body and throwing it to one side with the rest of their clothes. He ran his hands up her infamous legs and hooked one of them around his waist, keeping a hand on it as he kissed her and pleasuring her, loving her in every way he knew how. Their worlds came undone together as the euphoria and the pleasure washed over them, and he pressed a light kiss on her lips before giving her the widest of smiles that she happily returned.
Their escapades continued in the shower and he almost managed to convince her to stay when he had her in his bed once more, distracting her mind from work with his lips. Almost. She soon realised that she couldn’t afford to be late today, and pushed against his chest to sit herself up and sat cross legged in the middle of the bed trying to figure out what she was going to do about her clothes situation. She sent a quick text to Josie who told her where her spare key was located so she could let herself in and ransack her wardrobe, since she’d already left for work. She thanked her profoundly and after explaining what her plan was to Olly, she kissed him quickly and pulled on the skirt she wore last night under the shirt he’d ripped off her body just minutes ago, and headed towards the door.
As she reached for the handle, he was suddenly behind her with his arms around her waist, using one hand to grab his car key from the table by the side of the door and offering to drive her to her friends and to the radio, just as an excuse to be with her as much as possible. So he drives her to Josie’s and waits while she changes, and drives her to a street a few blocks away from the radio stations building itself so they wouldn’t be caught together, before she leaves him with a final kiss on his lips and a smile that rivalled his own.
He makes it home in time to listen to her interview, and watches on the webcam despite having just left her not half an hour ago. When they go to a break, and he sees her pull her phone from her bag, he sends her a text to tell her she looks beautiful, that he loves her; that he can’t wait to see her again. He smiles as her face lights up and she sends him a quick reply to tell him not to make her smile so much in front of Matt and Grimmy, they’ll question her and she’ll have to tell them about last night and this morning.
He doesn’t think it would be such a bad thing.
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Dont count the miles...
I’m scared today, more than I told you I was yesterday
Give me a moment to catch my breath
And hold me every second left
She took in a deep breath and tried to memorise everything about his smell.
“Good morning.” He whispered kissing the top of her head.
“Morning.” She wiggled slightly trying to get even closer to him, smiling as his arms tightened around her. “I don’t want you to go”
“I know darling. But we talked about this.” She turned her head and looked up at him
“I know but that was yesterday, you’re leaving today it’s completely different I’m scared what if we cant do this.”
“Do I need to show you the calendar?”
“No I know the maths” she sighed. “I just don’t want you to go.” She started drawing circles on his arm.
“I don’t want to go either!”
“You’re going on a world wide tour with one of your heroes and you don’t want to go?” she raised an eyebrow
“Are you joking! Oh course not! I finally got you and now I have to leave.”
“maybe I could just go with you. Are girls allowed on the tour bus!” she smiled.
“Of course! But I don’t know how we’d manage sharing a bunk bed?”
“What you’re saying my multimillionaire boyfriend wouldn’t spring for a bed just for me?” she sat up to look at him.
“I would. But I wouldn’t want you that far away.” She smiled and kissed him again.
“I always wanted to run away with a musician on tour when I was younger.”
“Well maybe you could make that come true.” He grinned.
“I would in a heart beat, but I’ve already signed my xtra contract.” He reached out and took her hand.
“I know. It was just wishful thinking. I’d give anything to take you touring Europe.”
“Maybe we could when you’re finished working. Take a month and travel.”
“That will certainly get me through the next few months.” He smiled and pulled her back down to him for another still novelty kiss. “Will I go get breakfast?”
“No stay here!” she wined wrapping her arms around him. “I want to stay here as long as we can.” He laughed.
“my flights in five hours.”
“So we can stay here for four and a half.” She smiled.
“when did you suddenly get so needy?” her face fell and she sat back up.
“Olly I’m scared.” She finally said. “What if we can’t do this?”
“We’re going to be fine Caz, this isn’t a problem its just a roadblock. We’ll be back together in a few months.”
“how many long distance relationships do you know that work out.”
“this isn’t a long distance relationship! This is me commuting!” he smiled.
Proud of me, that’s the only way I want you to be
Look at me and love what you see
I wont make it alone, I need something to hold
She waved and wrapped her arms around herself as he took that last corner and went out of sight. She was biting her lip afraid she’d start crying. He wouldn’t want her to be too upset! He’d be back in a few weeks. She could do this.
He sighed and sat back in the seat. He was doing this for his family. He wanted to have a career that would make everyone who’d told him he’d never amount to anything feel like idiots, and make her proud of him. He wanted to blow all the other men that were in her life out of the water. He wanted a future set in stone, surrounded around her. Pulling out his phone to switch it off he grinned. She’d text already,
I miss you
This was going to be harder than he thought.
The drive was slow, and it gave her way too much time to think. She’d finally gotten it right with him and he was leaving. He adored her, just as she was, loved everything about her. Her happiest moments were wrapped in his arms. How could she get through this life without him.
Kiss me on my shoulder, and tell me it’s not over
I promise to always come home to you
Remind me that I’m older to be brave, smart, sweet and bolder
And don’t give up on what we’re trying to do
Don’t count the miles, count the “I love you’s”
“God I missed you” he sighed kissing her forehead.
“Are you sure you cant stay another while?” she wrapped the sheet around herself as he pulled on his jumper. He leaned in and kissed her cheek.
“My flights in an hour darling. I’m pushing it already!”
“I don’t want this to be it…”
“I’m home again in four weeks! We’ll take it from there.” He grinned and sat back beside her kissing her neck.
“Promise?”
“I will be counting down the seconds until I am back in this bed.” She put on a pout and stared at him. “Come on you’re a big girl! We’ve managed six weeks. We can do this.” Finally kissing her bare shoulder he grabbed his shoes and walked out before she could kiss him back.
“OLLY!” she called out and he turned. “I love you
We made it out, and all the other people are asking how
This doesn’t even sound like truth to grow from a bruise
But one day we will realise how hard it was, how hard we tried
And how our hearts made it out alive
He flicked on the kettle and pulled two mugs out of the cupboard. Their cupboard. He smiled. They’d done it, six months with only four days together altogether. And now they were living together. His sister was still in shock that they’d managed it. Stayed together while on other sides of the words. He couldn’t be more proud of them both. And now he had the love of his life all to himself.
She smiled as she watched him play on the floor with Louie, he’d missed his nephew desperately, it was lovely to watch them together now. Her phone buzzed and she pulled it out, her sister was telling her that her cousin was had broken up with her boyfriend of ten years. Looking back up at Olly her smiled changed, how had they done it, stayed true to each other and together despite the distance. As he rolled over with the small boy tickling him her heart almost burst. She loved him more and more with every second.
Kiss me on my shoulder, and tell me it’s not over
I promise to always come home to you
Remind me that I’m older to be brave, smart, sweet and bolder
And don’t give up on what we’re trying to do
Don’t count the miles, count the “I love you’s”
She wrapped her arms around him and nuzzled her face into his back. Taking a second to feel it, he took a deep breath and turned.
“Tell me we’re ok” he said taking her hands.
“Of course.”
“You’re mad at me.”
“no, no I understand I get it…” she ran her hands down the lapels of his blazer.
“I didn’t think I’d have to go for so long it’s just Sarah booked…”
“Ols I understand! This is your job”
“tell me we can get through this.”
“Its just two months. We’ve done it before.” she shrugged and sat on the edge of the bed.
“It feels different this time.” She looked up at him threw her hair.
“Well it is. We’re engaged Olly we’re not meant to be at opposite sides of the world.”
“See I knew you were mad.”
“I can just see what’s going to happen. The papers are going to blow up about how you’re leaving me too and cougar Caroline drove another guy away.” She rolled her eyes.
“oh don’t be silly that’s not going to happen! I’m going on an album tour.” He sat beside her and tried to take her hands but she pulled away. “Caz all that matters is us, this is just another roadblock.”
“I’m sick of roadblocks. Cant we just lock ourselves in here and ignore the world.”
He laughed
“You’re so cute.”
“I’m not cute I’m meant to be a grown up!” she walked across the room to his suitcase and ran a hand across the top of it.
“I’ll be back soon and we can be grown ups together.” She turned and kissed him.
“Just remember how much I love you.”
And these are words I wish you’d said
But that’s not how it went
‘cause you gave up on us in the end
and I wont make it alone. I need something to hold
The ring sparkled as it moved in the sunlight. The diamond was dazzling and had been perfect on her hand, simple and stunning. But now it was in his hand beside the ocean thousands of miles away from that hand. He’d known it was different this time the phone calls we’re harder to time, his work took more out of him and the time difference was more difficult to compensate. The last thing he’d expected was a small box to arrive with simply the words “I can’t. I love you.” She’d been right the press had murdered her. Stories about how she’d driven him away, lies about girls he was seen with in America. And once again he’d been too far away to help her through it.
“Olly.” A voice came from behind him.
“Not now Sarah” he said standing up.
“But you have…”
“Sarah I said no! I’m going home!”
She grabbed the last bag and put it down to her car. Taking one last look around the house she left her key on the counter and ran down to her sister.
“Jo, tell me I’m doing the right thing.” She pleaded, tears in her eyes.
“I can’t Liney.” Her twin shrugged. “he’s home in three weeks cant you…”
“No. I needed him here and he wasn’t. this long distance thing was fine before when being together was new and electric and I just couldn’t wait for the day he’d be home but now I understand that he’s never going to be home for good.”
“you told me it was worth the tough times. I don’t want to see you just giving up.”
“Let’s just go…”
Kiss me on my shoulder, and tell me it’s not over
I promise to always come home to you
Remind me that I’m older to be brave, smart, sweet and bolder
And don’t give up on what we’re trying to do
Kiss me on my shoulder, and tell me it’s not over
I promise to always come home to you
Remind me that I’m older to be brave, smart, sweet and bolder
And don’t give up on what we’re trying to do
Don’t count the miles, count the “I love you’s”
She pulled the duvet up over her head as she heard the doorbell. For two days now she’d been ignoring everyone in the immediate area, her poor nieces included.
“Carrie?” there was a tentative knock on the door.
“I’m not hungry Jo.” She muttered.
“No its…”
“Caroline! Where are you!” her head spun around in the bed. “Caroline!” the door opened and suddenly he was there.
“Olly what are you…”
“What is this!” he said holding out the small blue box.”
“It’s my ri…”
“No what’s all this! I come home and you’re not there!”
“I couldn’t do it! I needed you here.”
“Then all you needed to do was ask! I would have come back immediately.”
“But your job…”
“Is nothing! Not compared to us!”
“No I just, I cant do this….”
“I’m home for good. This is it. No more miles no more planes unless we’re going together.”
“You can’t promise that.”
“I can! Come home, marry me and lets see the world together.” He said holding out the little box with an expression on his face that nearly killed her. “Just please don’t give up.”
“I love you…” the tears finally spilled down her cheeks and she jumped up to embrace him. Kissing the closest part of him she could she finally let herself forget the miles, and count the I love yous
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Weekends In Bed, carolly rpf
[So this is the beginning of the fic I've started, feedback please! Let me know if you would read more.] 'It's so obvious you love him Caroline, I can't believe you tried to keep it a secret!' 'Dawn, it's obvious because I do, I love him so so so so so much. So so so SO...' 'Woah, okay, I get your point.. that's a flipping LOT! I told you so, all that 'just friends' business was a load of rubbish.' 'Dawn..' Dawn let out a small giggle in Caroline's direction, looking at her less than pleased face. Caroline hated being proven wrong, especially by her best friend. Caroline had Dawn over for a girls night in, it had been a hard day at work, the first day of filming for the new series of Xtra. Without Olly. 'I really miss him you know.' 'Carrie, that's obvious too, you don't have to say.' Dawn replied, picking up her wine glass and taking a sip. 'But, it's been 23 days, I really do miss him. It's hard being away from him. I mean, we knew this was going to happen because he's a pop star and everything, but I love him. And Xtra isn't the same either.' Caroline was trying her best to hold back the tears, even in front of Dawn. She really did miss her boyfriend, she couldn't help it. 'Sorry, hormones are flying.'
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Just hold me close as I breathe in, breathe out…
It's been awhile, but here is (finally) The 3rd and final part of this fic...
It you haven't read the other 2 parts then they are here(1) and here(2)
Enjoy!
Part 3
Dear Olly,
You have no idea how happy it makes me to know that you feel like way about me. I truly do love you, and that night meant more to me than you will ever know.
You left so quickly that morning, I’m not even sure if you heard me say ‘Goodbye’,
A couple of weeks left until I get to see you again? Might not sound like a long time, but I’m sure it will go extremely slowly, but only because I want to back here with me.
I’m in love with you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
All my love, Caroline
Xx
Having already toured the Europe, Asia and Half of America, Olly was now on the home straight of his World tour. With only a couple of dates left to go he was desperate to get home to Caroline, who he had just, for the first time, admitted to that he was in love with her. He had been for ages, but that one night they spent together changed everything.
‘Caz! You alright love? You seemed lost’ Dawn said as she nudged Caroline on the arm during their lunch date.
‘Caroline! Hello! Earth to Caroline!’ She repeated.
‘What? Oh! Sorry Dawn, I’m not the best company at the moment.’
‘Really? Oh I hadn’t noticed.’ She replied sarcastically. ‘What’s up? It’s as if you’re missing somebody.’
‘I am, that’s why.’
‘Oh? Who?’ Dawn questioned.
‘Olly. We’ve been writing letters to each other whilst he’s been away. He loves me Dawn, and I love him, and when he gets back we’re going to be together.’
‘Well, I could have told you that, it doesn’t take a genius. When is he back?’
‘A week tomorrow’
‘Oh, that will zoom by, trust me.’
It didn’t. In fact, it was the slowest week and a bit of Caroline’s life. Wanting something so badly and having to wait for it was torture. Seconds felt like minutes. Minutes felt like hours and hours felt like days. She couldn’t sleep, she couldn’t think straight. Her mind was set on one thing, one person, Olly.
Eventually the time past, and it was time for Olly to return home. Caroline hadn’t slept that night, she was far too excited for sleep, like a young girl at Christmas time.
She had been awake since the early hours of the morning. Grooming herself for Olly’s satisfaction, worried that he might have changed his mind. The letters had stopped and she hadn’t heard from him since the letter he had sent her, she didn’t even know if he had received her letter.
She ran around her flat, tidying up, checking her appearance in the mirror every 5 minutes, running around some more, when finally, there was a knock at the door.
‘Oh Caaaarrrooooliiiineee!!’
It was Olly, Caroline couldn’t help but grin. She opened the door and was instantly greeted with a hug and a kiss.
‘Olly! You’re home!’
‘Yes I am! And now! You miss Flack, are mine!’
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