Murder on the Warfstache Express

Part 1: All Aboard, Full Steam Ahead

((So. That train story, right? Okay, but this is something I've been playing with the idea of writing ever since Wilford dropped that Murder on the Orient Express reference back in Wilford Motherlovin' Warfstache, and it really helped when AHWM and ISWM dropped and introduced us all to a wide cast of characters who don't all happen to look like Mark. Which is partially why this is a much different story than it would have been before ISWM. There's going to be a lot of familiar faces, some of them very out of place here, along with a couple of folks only referenced by name or as jokes. Also a murder, can't forget about that. Anyways, hope you enjoy it!))

Abe had never been a fan of confined spaces. Something about being caught with his back against the wall in one tight corner after another made it only natural to be on edge whenever he found himself confronted with a small room with only one way in or out.

A room very much like this train compartment he’d already lost track of time in, between the muted colors of the shoebox-like space that offered a seat just long enough to stretch out on and a window looking out at the unchanging landscape whiplashing by too quickly to really focus on anything in particular, and not much of anything else in the way of entertainment or stimulation. Abe had the riveting options of staring out at snow-covered hills and snow-covered trees and a dreary gray sky that promised, yes, even more snow that no one had asked for, or up at the jostling luggage rack overhead while he thought about the usual things.

Things like why the hell he was on this train in the first place.

He gave up on that pretty quickly and jumped up again, pacing the narrow space before deciding he really needed to stretch his legs. Besides, it couldn’t hurt to get a better idea of the layout of the train.

Just in case.

If he had noticed the conversation going on in low voices outside of his door, Abe would have stopped and held his ear to the door in the hope of hearing some of it. After all, he was a detective, which made eavesdropping practically his moral duty. That, and he was nosy as hell and bored to go with it.

If he had known a little more about the pair standing out in the hallway at the time, he would have loved nothing more than to have a regular door with which he could have “accidentally” hit one or both with as a possible alternative for some quick amusement.

Both options were only apparent in hindsight though, because in the moment Abe just turned toward the sliding door and opened it abruptly, startling the two men on the other side so badly they both jumped away from the opened door like it was a ticking timebomb.

One, the man with slicked-back black hair dressed in a suit that felt expensive to even look at, recovered first and gave Abe a withering look before remarking aloud as though addressing the air in general, “So much for this being luxury travel. It looks like they’ll let any low class, ill-mannered lout buy a ticket these days.”

Abe bristled, any apology he might have had instantly dying in response to that stuck-up, drawling voice. “And I thought you’d have something intelligent to say when you opened that pretty mouth of yours, so I guess we’ll all have to get used to being disappointed today.”

The rich man drew himself up, visibly swelling with indignation, but the other man cleared his throat and subtly moved between the two as he said, “Perhaps we could continue this conversation somewhere a little more private, sir?”

“Somewhere more private than the middle of the hall?” Abe asked. “Wow, wonder where you could find something like that around here.”

Choosing to ignore that comment, the second man slid open the door opposite Abe’s and stepped aside for the rich man with an, “After you, sir.”

The rich guy gave Abe one last sneer before going into the other compartment, which from the glimpse Abe got looked to be far more elegant and spacious than his own. The lackey added a disapproving stare of his own in Abe’s direction before sliding the door shut again with a sharp rap and promptly lowering the shade on the other side of the door’s round window.

Well, Abe could tell he was already off to a great start getting to know his fellow passengers. Although if the rest were anything like those two, he’d be better off staying in his own room for the rest of the trip.

A not very tempting thought, so instead Abe stepped out into the hallway and slid the door shut behind him, taking a moment to look both ways.

More rooms to either side, the doors slightly offset from their opposite so that any uncovered windows just looked out into the hallway and not directly into their neighbor’s room. To his right past a few more compartments was the door he used to step onto the train, and beyond that he’d caught a glimpse of the luggage car being filled by the station porters. Past the luggage car there was only the train’s engine, so nothing to see that way.

He turned left and paused not three steps away from his door, head unconsciously tilting while his brow furrowed in concentration. Over the rhythmic sound of the train’s wheels turning and the distant huff of the engine, Abe thought he heard something else.

Music?

It was faint at first, but the longer he listened the louder it seemed to get until the noise of the train died away, until the beat roared in his ears and drummed in his chest, the sound so tangible he was surprised the next door along and seeming source of the music wasn’t shaking in its casing. It was as much a mystery as why there was no complaint from the rich man next door, who had to be able to hear that noise through the connecting wall between the two rooms.

Abe slowed, staring at the covered window of the door like he could see through it if he tried hard enough. That thumping, upbeat music was familiar, familiar in a way that itched at the back of his mind and made his trigger finger twitch. Where had he heard this before?

Before he could make the connection, Abe heard the rattle of another door opening and quickly turned away from the offending door, eager not to be spotted staring into someone else’s room. A maneuver that put him directly in the path of the man stepping out of the room opposite, the two colliding so hard that the twin batches of swearing temporarily drowned out both the music and the train.

“…Sorry about that,” the new man muttered after a moment, rubbing his own shoulder. Fedora, oversized trench coat worn over a suit that looked a little too new, and a piercing stare that returned Abe’s once over with one of its own. If Abe wasn’t already suspicious enough, he’d felt something during that collision and was pretty sure it had nothing to do with the stranger being happy to see him.

There were only so many people who’d travel with a hidden weapon close to hand, after all.

A number that should have included Abe, except he had been forced to turn over his gun before boarding the train with the assurance that it would stay in a weapon safe during the duration of the trip. Flashing his badge hadn’t helped, the conductor no doubt calling his bluff because they were leaving his jurisdiction—or was it that they weren’t in it at the time?

Point was, if this guy had a gun on him, that meant he either found a way to sneak it onboard or he had the kind of authority to get a pass from the conductor.

All of this passed through Abe’s mind rapidly, but not fast enough that there weren’t several seconds of awkward silence before he asked, “In a hurry to get somewhere?”

“…No,” the other man said, proving he wasn’t much of a liar, at least. He stepped back into the still open doorway behind him and gestured for Abe to move on. “Please, you first. I’m sure your companion will be wondering where you’re at.”

Companion? Where’d he get that idea?

“No, I’m traveling alone. Same as you, I’m guessing?”

“Yes?” His eyes went past Abe to the room he’d just left, brow furrowing in confusion before he made a visible effort to relax it. “I mean, yes, it’s just me for now. Traveling for work.”

“Work? What kind of work is that?” Abe asked, trying to appear open and only as curious as a fellow traveler might be even as he glanced at the room behind the man, the quick glance enough to tell him that it was much smaller than his own (a fact he didn’t think possible until now), with no sign of any convenient personal belongings left out and about to give a hint as to their owner.

The man paused, clearly not having prepared for follow up questions, and finally said, “Oh, boring stuff. Like 99% of it’s just, you know, paperwork to make the home office happy. What about you, where are you headed?”

The question came quickly, Abe thinking less because the guy was interested and more because he didn’t want to leave an opening to ask what the other 1 percent was supposed to be.

“Oh just…to the next stop, same as everyone else on here I guess.”

The awkward silence lasted much longer this time, both men struggling to come up with any more small talk without the risk of having to answer their own questions. Abe broke it first with a clearing of his throat and said, “I, uh, was just going to get some fresh air. See you around, uh…”

“Apless,” the man answered immediately, showing the barest hint of a wince around the eyes before he continued, “Harold Apless.”

“My name’s Abe,” Abe answered, distracted by the realization that the previously overwhelming music seemed to have stopped at some point without his noticing it. “Nice to meet you, Happy.”

“My name’s not—”

The protest gave way to a defeated sigh behind Abe as he pulled open the car’s door and stopped in the small space between cars where the shaking and jolting was worse than ever. The enclosed space wasn’t made for people to stay here long, with doors to either side for boarding when the train wasn’t in motion providing enough gaps for the freezing cold outside to seep in. As different from that crowded room, too packed with dancers to even breathe, as he could get.

Dancers?

Abe winced and rubbed his eyes, dispelling that memory as quickly as he could. That’s why he was here, right? To get some distance between himself and…all of that.

Abe took a deep breath and exhaled, fogging up the glass of the nearby window, the welcome chill still enough to make him glad he hadn’t taken off his black leather jacket, and continued on through the next door and into what proved to be the lounge car.

Wooden paneling and low, flickering lamps set in intervals along the walls gave the lounge a warm, comfortable air, helped by plush armchairs seated in rows to either side around the windows and small, round tables. A thick, elegant carpet ran the length of the car and muffled the noise of the wheels underneath to the point it felt too quiet when Abe entered, not helped by how few people were seated or talking around the room.

A small bar area at the opposite end gave Abe something to aim for as he walked the length of the car, checking faces and counting heads out of habit.

Not that there were many to keep track of.

There was a woman dressed in bright, flamboyant colors underneath a white jacket, a bandana holding her long, wavy hair out of the way as she studied the mass of papers and books covering every inch of the table in front of her. From what he saw as he passed by, said papers and books all looked like a bunch of plans and equations so dense that his brain refused to take any of it in out of self-defense.

She on the other hand was so utterly focused that her lips moved along with thoughts that she couldn’t seem to keep contained within herself, occasionally sparing a hand from the coffee cup she held in front of her for lack of anywhere else to put it to push her glasses back in place or retrieve the pencil behind her ear to make another note in the same handwriting that littered all of the papers. For her, Abe and the rest of the train may as well not have existed for all it mattered in the moment.

The other two passengers he passed next did notice him, but were so engrossed in their conversation over a game of chess that the older woman wearing a black burnoose and dress littered with silver stars and matching jewelry could only spare him a friendly smile. Across from her, a man dressed in khaki with a brown leather jacket not all that dissimilar to the one Abe was wearing tilted the brim of his brown hat in the detective’s direction without looking away from the board, his hand still resting on the knight as he considered the consequences of his move.

“Well, you can tell me more about the monkeys or avoid losing your rook, but I’m afraid you can’t do both, dear.”

“Funnily enough, I’m pretty sure one of those monkeys stole my traveling chess set. That or my assistant on that little adventure still had it on him when we realized the simians weren’t quite ready to give up their piece of the map.”

“A real shame, that,” the woman said, shaking her head. “To shreds, you say?”

Abe had several questions, but he kept walking toward the bar with the confidence that a good drink would be less likely to leave him with regret in the long run.

 Or it would have, if he hadn’t reached the bar just as the bartender stopped what he was doing and looked up, his customer service smile disappearing with a flash of recognition.

He’d recognize that handsome face and look of distress and horror anywhere, especially since aside from the emblem of the train company on his lapel and a splash of dark red on his tie and handkerchief, his outfit really wasn’t all that different from the getup he wore back when he was Mark’s butler.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Abe asked and Benjamin shushed him with a glance at the other passengers.

“Language!” Benjamin hissed, his own voice lowered to just above a whisper. “Please do not disturb the other passengers.”

“That doesn’t answer my question, pal,” Abe said, obliging him with a low growl.

“I am not your pal,” Benjamin said, straightening his already ridiculously broad shoulders and trying to look prim and proper like Abe hadn’t seen him threaten a man with a feather duster once. “And I should think it’s rather obvious that I am working here. Would you like something to drink?”

“I think you and me already know the answer to that one,” Abe said, and Benjamin rolled his eyes before reaching under the bar for the strong stuff. “Now you’re talking.”

Abe sidled onto one of the stools, turned so that he could keep an eye on the butler turned bartender and the rest of the carriage.

“I had to make my way somehow after my last employer…” Benjamin paused, lip trembling, and with an effort he shook himself and poured Abe a healthy dose in a glass before pulling a second glass for himself. Pushing the glass toward Abe, he asked, “What brings you here, detective?”

Abe took the drink and took a long sip before setting it down with a sigh, because it was rude to leave a good drink waiting.

That, and he had to stall for an answer somehow, but the best he could come up with was to turn it around with another question as he asked, “Why do you think I’m here?”

Benjamin gulped down the contents of his glass, which admittedly was barely a splash of alcohol poured out before his conscience caught up with him, and swiftly put the glass out of sight before any of the others saw him drinking on the job.

“Still chasing leads then?”

Abe shrugged. “Maybe.”

Looking out over the rest of the lounge car in search of a change of subject, Abe suddenly said, “Not a lot of people here, huh? Guess they’re all hiding out in their rooms.”

“Mm, no, I think this is about half of the guests on this particular trip,” Benjamin answered, and it was his turn to shrug when Abe turned a disbelieving stare on him. “Look around, detective. This is hardly vacationing weather in country that I assure you is much more pleasant in the spring, and at this time of the year the only people crossing the country by train are those who have somewhere they need to be and no other way to get there.”

He gestured toward the back of the train behind him and continued, “There is so little interest that we only have the one passenger car for this leg of the journey. There is just the dining car behind this, and a mail car we are taking to the next station as a way to earn enough revenue to even justify running the train as scheduled. On the other hand, I believe the services we provide during the journey will more than make this a trip to remember for all of our esteemed passengers.”

“I’m not tipping you extra for that.”

Benjamin scowled and made a pretense of cleaning the other side of the already pristine surface of the bar to put some distance between him and the detective.

Fine by Abe, who removed himself from the bar stool and took a more comfortable seat in the corner of the car.

Somehow knowing that there were so few people on board made this trip feel more…not sad, although it was kind of sad in a pathetic sort of way. Gloomy, maybe, with the darkening sky outside and the white snow coming down sideways in the train’s wake? No, more than that. There was another word for the mood settling in around Abe’s shoulders.

“Perhaps loneliness,” Wilford suggested.

“More like ominous, like a premonition of things to come,” Abe answered before freezing in place, the narration that threatened to spill out of him hitting a hard pause on that thought, his eyes still on the dark windows where he could see the reflection of the man sitting opposite him, smile gleaming and eyes twinkling like he was waiting for the joke to sink in.

Abe held his breath and turned his head, as though expecting both man and reflection to disappear when he laid eyes on the real thing.

Instead, the colorful man in an extravagant yellow and pink confectionary of a suit crossed his legs and settled further back into his plush seat, looking around the train car with undisguised wonder. His drawling, unhinged voice stirred up the worst kind of memories in Abe as he said, “You sure do know how to travel in style, don’t you detective?”

Abe nearly spilled his drink reaching for a gun that wasn’t there, a thousand questions running through his mind although most of them could be summed up by the words that finally made their way out of his mouth after a bout of helpless sputtering:

“What the hell?!”

Wilford took a sip of hot chocolate from a vibrant pink mug and swished it around his mouth thoughtfully before answering. God, Abe hoped that was hot chocolate. Wilford hyped up on coffee was a nightmare waiting to happen, and he already felt like he was in a waking one of those.

“The suit’s a bit much, isn’t it? But unlike you, I happen to enjoy dressing to the occasion. That, and apparently trousers are ‘mandatory’ around these parts, for some reason.”

Of all the feelings Abe expected when he laid eyes on Wilford Warfstache again, “relief” wasn’t one of them, but then he’d also never considered the apparently non-zero chance of running into his greatest enemy pantsless either.

“Aw, you think I’m the greatest?” Wilford said, his brown eyes crinkling with a smile.

“My greatest enemy, and don’t do that,” Abe answered, and if anything, Wilford’s smile just grew wider. “It’s not a compliment! How did you even get here?!”

Abe realized it was a ridiculous question as soon as he asked it, but Wilford seriously considered it before shrugging.

“Same as you, I suppose. Say, where’s this train going, anyways?”

“Why would you get on a train without knowing where you’re going?” Abe asked.

Another shrug. “Something, something, ‘life is about the journey, not the destination,’ or whatever it is people put on the postcards. What do you think they do for fun around here?”

Wilford turned around in his chair again to look over his shoulder at the other passengers, the silence except for the background noise of the train positively deafening.

“Huh. Not much, by the look of things. Bet we can do something to liven things up around here, what do you say, you old—”

Wilford’s words stopped short on his lips when he turned back around and found the detective inches away, a finger dangerously close to his nose as Abe spoke in a low growl.

“You’re not doing a thing on this trip, Colonel. The second we get off, I’m going to put you down.” Abe paused, aware something hadn’t come out right there. “I mean, the next stop this train makes, you’re under arrest.”

“Huh, I think you’re the only one who still calls me that,” Wilford said, unbothered by the threat.

“In fact,” Abe continued, too angry to be deterred by Wilford’s calm, “You’re already under arrest, and if I catch even a whiff of you trying to escape or laying even a finger on anyone else on this train, I’ll…”

He let the threat hang in the air unspoken, mostly because he couldn’t think of a way to finish it. His gun was locked away, and he couldn’t be sure the same could be said for Wilford, not if that Happy guy was able to keep his own weapon. That, and he knew all too well what Wilford could be capable of when the mood took him.

Wilford looked down at Abe’s finger still pointing in his face and gave it a little kiss before saying, “Whatever you say, detective. I’ll be on my best behavior, promise.”

“…Why do I feel like that’s not a very high bar?”

Wilford winked and toasted Abe with his mug of hot chocolate before taking a sip. The gesture revealed the black block letters printed on the side of the mug to Abe for the first time: SPOILER ALERT!

((End of Part 1. Hope you enjoyed it! I'm going to try to space each part by a couple of days or so, just because they're all on the longer side. For the record, no, that's not Actor Mark, but he is a Mark ego. Sort of. You'll see. Genuinely curious how many people know/remember Harold Apless. As far as I know he was only ever referenced on the ISWM website, and we only got a Noirverse photo of him. Haven't fully committed to who I imagine as "playing" him, maybe Sean? But judging by the shows' history that means he would actually end up being played by MatPat, so...

Link to Part 2: An Easy Offer to Refuse.

Also a confession about the tag list: it's, uh, been so long since I've written anything I'm not sure if this is the most up-to-date version at all. I also ended up removing a lot of urls that no longer connected to a blog, so I may have accidentally deleted a few valid ones. If you'd like to be added or removed, please just let me know in a comment.

Said hopefully not too out of date taglist: @silver-owl413 @asteriuszenith @withjust-a-bite @blackaquokat @catgirlwarrior @neverisadork @luna1350 @oh-so-creepy @95fangirl @a-bit-dapper @randomartdudette @cactipresident @hotcocoachia @purple-star-eyes @shyinspiredartist @avispate @autumnrambles @authorracheljoy @liafoxyfox @hidinginmybochard

))

okay so it's about a week until I leave the country for over a month. I am dutifully filling up my queue so y'all will stay entertained while I am gone, but I should probably state for the record that I may not be easy to get ahold of while I'm gone. if you really want me to see something, send me a tumblr chat/ask so it'll show up in a separate inbox from my notifications.

I'll probably post about some travel stuff here, if I'm not too tired, but I suspect the lion's share will end up on twitter and especially instagram. if you would like to see travel posts, I am @iletaitunefois on twitter and @cookinguptales on IG.

if you do not want to see travel posts, please block '#the travel bug'.

I'm also gonna offer up postcards again. I'm not going to make any promises because I don't know how easy it'll be for me to find time/post offices everywhere I go in Japan -- and also because I may be cursed; I think like only half of my Christmas cards actually made their way to their destinations last year.

But! If you do want a postcard, send me a private message and I'll add you to my list. If you have any special requests (locations, nature, cityscapes, cute characters, whatever) lmk and I can see if I can make that work, but again, no promises. I usually keep track of nearby post offices in Japan because they're good places for foreigners to withdraw money, but like. I'm also not gonna take a ton of time out of my trip to find a post office, y'know? Certain legs of the trip will probably be easier than others for that.

FINALLY, if you want to know more about the trip before you decide to follow my IG or ask for a postcard (or, if like me, you are simply nosy) here's a vague overview of the trip:

The first couple weeks of the trip, I'll actually be on the ocean. There's this thing that cruise lines do called "repositioning cruises" where they literally just sail across the ocean. This is so a cruise company can use a ship in a different location, generally. Like if they usually use a boat in the Caribbean, but during another time of the year want to use it in the Pacific, they still need to get it over there. And why not let people ride it during the journey?

The trip is really more pragmatic than it is designed for tourists, though, so they tend to be very cheap. They're long, there aren't a lot of stops, they tend to be during unpopular travel times... So long story short, we can take a two week cruise to Japan for like... half the cost of a plane ticket to Japan. And my mother and I can work from wherever and my father and my aunt are retired, so. We'll just. be in the Pacific Ocean for two weeks. lmao

(I've moved around my work schedule so I probably won't have to do much work in Japan, but I'll have to work on the boat. ;;)

There will be one stop at the beginning of the trip (Alaska) and one at the end (Hokkaido!!!!!) so that'll be fun! But for the most part, I will mostly be working and writing and vegging out on the boat. I'm downloading a lot of tv now because boats tend to have minimal internet. lmao

(And don't worry, we chose a boat that has vax and testing requirements! Which... will probably make it safer than SEPTA here in Philly...)

Once we're in Japan, though, we're really gonna be putting our JR passes to the test. Here's a not exhaustive list of places we're going and things we're doing, in no particular order. (I... tend not to let people know exactly where I am until I've left that place lmao.)

Tokyo (obviously)

Kyoto

Osaka

Nara (to see the shosoin)

Yamagata

Two different onsen towns

Yokohama

Takarazuka 😎 iykyk

Tokyo Disneyland/DisneySea

Wakayama

Kawagoe

Maybe Hakone depending on weather

various Halloween-themed meals in Tokyo and Halloween itself in Dotonbori

several very sacred mountains to learn about shugendo

castles!! and more shrines and temples than you can shake a stick at

Asahi tour (for dad haha)

sumo stable tour (also for dad)

Pokemon stuff (.... also for dad lmao)

seein some cute animals

a lot of interesting food!!!

tbh we're going to be exhausted, but there's a lot of train travel and easy days in there so we can rest then. (dad and I both love trains lmao) Dad actually hurt himself about a month ago, so I took out some of the stuff I was planning that involved more walking (like the old pilgrimage route in Wakayama, climbing Nokogiriyama, and the monkey park in Jigokudani) so that'll also prevent me from overdoing it too much.

part of me is like "wow this is too much you should scale back and save responsibly" but a lot of my trip is gonna be subsidized by my family in return for translating for them all and arranging everything, and we're gonna save money in lodging and such, so I'm just. gonna tell my brain to shut up and enjoy living before we die lmao.

(when you grew up really poor, it can be kind of hard to let go and allow yourself to enjoy nice things when you're older and more stable financially lmao. but I'm getting better at it!)

also, I'm gonna bring Glen! my little Tabikaeru frog! we'll go to Kusatsu Onsen together lmao.

reflections on flying solo versus in a flock

July 1, 2022

Looking through my personal journal pages, one thing that has come up a lot in the past few days was the transition from traveling solo to being part of a bigger whole. In my previous post, I talked about loneliness and anxiety. Now I’m feeling the weight of having my social battery needing a recharge since officially beginning Ewha International Summer College.

On one hand, I’m not alone anymore. Lots of other students have similar difficulties and we pool our knowledge together to make sure we all stay afloat. I have met others from The Netherlands, Singapore, Canada, and Hong Kong (to name a few) and everyone is super eager to ask questions and answer yours in return. In a situation like this, I think everyone longs to feel a connection to others.

On the other hand, I don’t have the freedom to do whatever I want, on my own terms anymore (on my first full day in Seoul, I took the subway and explored the city hall area on my own, at my own pace, and enjoyed it thoroughly).

Today we had our first field trip to Gyeongbokgung and so we had to be there around noontime. Being the anxious person I am, I decided to plan to get there earlier and figured, why not take some much needed me-time?

So I went to a café today called Nuldam Space by Gyeongbokgung. At Nuldam, you can sit down and write a letter to your future self. Taking my postcard, envelope, pack of wax pellets, pen, and drink, I went to the second floor to write my letter. As many of you know, I am a huge fan of mail. There is something quintessential to a letter that physically weathers the journey to its destination. It is our own thoughts being intentionally transported through space and time to some other point from where we currently stand. In many ways, it’s terribly romantic and glaringly human.

Writing in general helps me slow down, reflect, and process my thoughts. These past few days since moving into the dorms, starting classes, and meeting tons of new people have all been a flurry of energy and activity. It is exciting to know that somehow the universe has put all of us together in this program and that there are many memories just waiting to be made.

But I am an introvert at heart and my inner voice was begging to be heard.

In social situations, there is so much I cannot control. But in this moment, it was just me and these carefully executed motions.

Melting the wax, pouring, and pressing the seal to the envelope.

They are little moments in the grand scheme of things, yet these moments become the building blocks for our lived experiences.

Yes, dressing up in hanbok and touring Gyeongbokgung Palace with others was incredibly fun. These experiences are the kind of things that usually make it to our Instagram pages.

But it is over the pouring of makgeolli, the stirring of a latte, or the scribbling of a pen in which deeper connections to our own selves and others can be forged.

The Eurovision Song Contest we had to have

The journey from Tel Aviv to Rotterdam was an unexpectedly long one. Who knew that when Duncan Lawrence raised the trophy in May 2019 that another Eurovision Song Contest Grand Final would not take place for another 736 days? Having to wait such a long time between two Eurovision (excluding 2 x Junior contests) was excruciating, soul destroying and plainly depressing. And just like that, Eurovision 2021 has come and has now gone.

As the title says, it is The Eurovision Song Contest we had to have. It is a bold statement and I considered it for a day before putting it there. In reflection the song contest in Rotterdam was a wonderful event for many reasons which I’d like to discuss a bit. So this may take a while, but bear with me and hopefully, I’ll make it worth your while.

THE HOSTS

Four hosts was two too many, but let’s talk about them. Chantal is beautiful and the most professional of the foursome. Jan was the token male and while his performance was contained to a very small potion, it was nevertheless, fine. Edsilia was much more chilled than I expected and provided a warm presence amongst these people. Nikkie was probably the most down to earth of them all, possibly the most personable, but also somehow cold.

In actually effect, while there were four of them, they worked. No one took a lite load but they each had an equal presence in the show. As many other people have mentioned, everyone would have preferred more Edsilia and Nikkie to Jan and Chantal, but I’m not terribly fussed. They were all well practiced and very on point for the event and as a viewer I was pleased by this.

THE STAGE 

Like most Eurovision stages, they do not look like anything unless you turn on the lights. That was definitely the case for this one. The lights were on, the stage sparkled, and the stage was alive in every way that it was asked. The screens provided everything that were needed for each of the songs and other performances. The transparent screen in the middle of the venue added so much to some of the performances and was the masterstroke that made some of them visually exciting.

There was one thing about the stage that felt like they were reminiscing stages of the Dutch past. I felt a hint of the Amsterdam 1970 stage on the sides. I don’t think it was a co-incidence, but I liked the fact that the paid homage like that. Everything else was state of the art.

POSTCARDS

The postcard films were well put together to present a place in the Netherlands, a tiny house structure with items that belong or relate to the act coming up and then a green screen appearance of the act in the tiny house. 

While the postcard as a whole were well put together and cleverly created, I felt I missed out on seeing more of the Netherlands because they were focused more on what was coming and less with the airport, the canal, the lighthouse, the field, the tulips and whatever else was presented. So it’s only a small thing in a small film, but I wanted more of a Netherlands tourism experience in the films.

THE INTERVAL ACTS

It’s a funny thing about this year’s interval acts, and to be completely honest, I happy about it. If you asked a fan about Eurovision 2014, people will say that they remember ‘Love love peace peace’ and Justin Timberlake. In 1994, people remember ‘Riverdance’. In Tel Aviv, there was Madonna. I like that the intervals this year did not overshadow the entrants to the song contest. They were a time filler, a light refreshment and then it was over. For the most part well performed, entertaining and gone before you know it

I recall there was something about water in the first semi final, there was a dancer and a bike in the second, the former winners sang on Rotterdam buildings and some unifying song and dance. Nikkie did some little films about losing, and behaviour in the green room during voting. All were quality performances that were well constructed, organised and presented. They held the viewers attention while we waited for the votes to commence/announcement of the qualifiers and because they were each engaging, they seemed to go quickly.

THE OUTCOME

In most cases, things went as expected in the semi finals. Fans were disappointed with Croatia not qualifying, but I don’t think the betting had them qualifying. Romania was expected to qualify, but Roxen could not sing the song and move at the same time. Ireland suffered the same fate with an impressive staging. Semi final 2 went as expected as well; maybe Austria was expected to get through in place of Albania; i disagree.

The results/placings in the final were a bit of a surprise to me, but there was one certainty for me and that was that Italy deserved their win. There is a very simple reason for it’s success too. It’s not that it was a loud song or that the song was outlandish, or the way they were dressed. The reason that Italy won was that the performance of the song was a natural performance. I’m sure there was choreography of movement, but they were not outside of what they usually do. There was no gimmick, no dance routine, no green screen to worry about, no spinning diamond or large gimmick hanging from the roof of the stadium. It is also why the French entry was such a success and for a lesser part Iceland and Ukraine. Finland and Portugal also presented an entry that was in essence what was expected for that type of song.

Switzerland was a vast success in my eyes. They rolled the dice and they came up on top with the juries. Switzerland have rolled out a prop in the past to highlight a song, but this year they added lighting and camera work to add to the tension of the entry and it worked. Gjon looked a bit clumsy at times, but it was  excellent captivating three minutes.

There were some countries that were dependent on a large prop. Some were there to attract votes as they went with the song while others to distract from it. Russia and Cyprus had several well placed props that worked well and were relevant to the song. Greece had a large invisible prop that made what was a good song appear like a joke entry. Malta had a prop that didn’t make sense to the entry being performed. Bulgaria’s rock was both inspirational and strange to me. Moldova’s revolving diamond worked for her also, but it was just a surface to perform choreography on. 

I want to spend a moment of praise on Serbia and Belgium that had very different performances, but appropriately performed. Serbia took their sexy manic, hair choreographed selves all over the stage gyrating and moving like they had drunk 15 cups of coffee. Belgium, on the other hand, was very intense and sedate in their presentation mainly because most of them were playing instruments that were unmovable. 

Of the countries that retained their choreography from a national final, other than Iceland, was Lithuania. They had varied it only very little from the national final and in their case, the performance was crazy perfection to match the theme of the song.  I was disappointed with Norway, Azerbaijan and Sweden for retaining almost identical choreography to their songs from the film clip/national final, but I wasn’t a big fan of either song in the final. They seemed tired in appearance and in formatting. Azerbaijan needs a further slap for submitting their 2020 song with a new name.

I feel some disappointment for a few of the entrants. I’m going to start with the United Kingdom. Poor James Newman. He had a thumping good song that fans liked. There was enthusiasm from the fans that the UK would do better this year and they did worse. What I find astounding is he does not appear to be a shy person, yet he allowed someone in the United Kingdom delegation to produce that choreography, that outfit and those props for that song. To my ear, James sounded sad and dejected in the final and I was unbelievably disappointed that they didn’t score something from somewhere.

I’m disappointed for San Marino too. Senhit has showed she is a class act and has spent the last year enthusiastically covering Eurovision songs. But at the song contest, she appeared to be a forgotten entrant. Even with the addition of Flo Rida did not give the song some cred. I have a recurring image of Senhit’s shoulders slump and physically shrink on hearing that her efforts accounted for 50 points.

I’m also disappointed for the Netherlands. They most likely did not want to host again and it is a sad curse that countries that host usually end near the bottom of the scoreboard (excluding Super Sweden). But to score so terribly for what was a gloriously performed entry was unconscionable. I praise the Netherlands for choosing such a wonderful cultural performance for the stage.

At the bottom end, Spain and Germany had very different entries, performed with contrasting enthusiasm and it got them both a very low level of support. Spain had the most tired song that was boring as all hell and the presentation of the entry gave the audience nothing in return but a large grey beach ball in the sky. Back to the drawing board?  Germany was destined to fail in March. The charisma and fun of their film was completely missing from the staging and it was never going to go well.

Albania had the misfortune of being ignored, given a terribly bad draw for the second year straight and not given anywhere near the appropriate amount of votes required. Anxhela gave a good stylish and appropriate performance. She was on-point vocally and in her performance on stage.

Israel, on the other hand, was a spectacle. The song was kind of meh, performed with a lot of choreography to distract from it. She did a whistle note; so? I’m sure she had to get noticed somehow with her t-shirt dress, her nude illusion reveal and the headdress she stole from reigning RuPaul Drag race winner, Symone. (Did she not no know where she was coming and who would be watching? Picked that up immediately)

IN CONCLUSION

There is one other things that I have not mentioned so far and it only occurred to me after re-reading some of the above comments. The Dutch were very time conscious. They said they were keeping the final under four hours and they pulled it in and got it done. In my opinion, it was a Eurovision that was very breezy, and very light experience because while the experience of Eurovision was 8 hours of your week watching the shows, this year did not seem like an ordeal. I felt that the shows progressed quickly without fuss or propaganda. As a package it came together well across the board.  

It was a good Eurovision year and had something to cater for the taste of everyone. Some songs were not suited to everyone, but that happens. Below is how I saw this years song’s after the three shows and believe me I have changed it a few times before settling on this list. Looking at it, I want to move them around again.

So that’s it. Next year it will be somewhere in Italy; maybe Turin, maybe Rome, Milan or Bologna. It won’t matter. Feel free to comment, complain, debate. I’m happy to back myself and for you to convince me otherwise. I haven’t got anything else to do. : )

Hey gracie, I'm the anon who u recently dragged into the stucky fandom with your fic, chapter 8 was so great, I don't want it to be over but at the same time I neeed it to be resolved and them in love 😁😁😁 could u maybe recommend me some of your favourite stucky fics plsssss I am now desperate ❤️

Hi babe! Could you recommend some good stucky fics??? I’ve read yours and absolutely love them!!!! Karma’s a fake orgasm was EVERYTHING I never knew I needed!!!

Hi Nonnies, I am extremely sorry about how long I’ve taken to actually answer this but hopefully the rec list will be worth it!! a friend of mine actually recently asked for fic recs so i was kind of kicked into creating this list – this also means it comes with recommendations from a couple of mates who also like stucky, one of which actually recced me some of these fics when i got into the pairing so without further ado !!!

Set in the Canon Verse Fics

Not Easily Conquered Series

In 1945, Steve Rogers jumps from a nosediving plane and swims through miles of Arctic Ocean to a frozen shore.

In 1947, Steve Rogers marries Peggy Carter.

In 1966, the New York Times finds the lost letters of Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes.

side-note: okay this one isn’t technically canon seeing as it’s Steve didn’t die at the end of Cap1 series, but its pretty close to canon so i’m keeping it in this category

Accidentally On Purpose

‘Bucky turns toward him, sliding his hand onto Steve’s hip as he mutters a lazy “G’night” and presses a soft kiss to the corner of Steve’s mouth. It takes him by surprise, and he barely has time to register Bucky’s half-closed eyes and the warmth of whiskey-ripe breath on his lips, before it’s over.’

After Bucky drunkenly kisses Steve by accident, it just seems to keep on happening, until it’s not so much by accident anymore.

Bei Mir Bist Du Schoen

Bucky Barnes and the Great Sexuality Crisis of 1938.

Body Studies 

Bucky wants Steve to draw him. Bucky’s bored enough to model, and that’s – that’s –

“That’s – a fun idea,” Steve supplies, fingers tight around his pencil. “I mean, we could try that if you wanted to.” Is his palm sweating on the pencil? “It’d be pretty boring for you, though, I guess.”

no heart to recall

He’s been in Steve Rogers’s company for less than twenty-four hours and he’s already losing sight of his mission.

This, You Protect Series

The mission resets abruptly, from objective: kill to objective: protect

One Day We Won’t Have to Be Scared

Steve and Bucky are at a gay bar in the 30s, and some guy offers them money to take pictures of them as they fuck. They need the money, they say yes, and pretty much forget about it afterwards. The pictures come out years later.

Painted In Indigo

‘“You should be careful of that one,” Mr. Hendrickson says, with a nod to Bucky outside the window. “It ain’t right. Looking at you all the time as he does. The way he should be looking at girls.”

Steve laughs, because damn, but what a ridiculous idea.’

Or, five times Steve caught Bucky looking at him, and the one time he looked first.

Shrunky/Shrinky-Clinks Fics

This means either Cap!Steve with Modern Bucky, or Beefy Bucky with Pre-Serum Steve (i’m a bit fuzzy on the exact Shrinky-Clinks definition)

We Could be Heroes (Me and You)

When the Asset drags himself out of the Potomac River after the battle of the Triskelion, something has changed.There is a presence inside his head that wasn’t there before; one that speaks directly to his most primal instincts, and it speaks only of one thing:To run. Run now, run fast, and to never, ever stop.And so, the Asset does.A story of recovery, of facing one’s inner demons, and learning to accept the harsh truths of life. Of love, and the many different shapes it can take. The value of choice and free will, and how someone who doesn’t believe themselves worthy of being saved can end up being someone else’s hero.

The Voyager

On the day aliens fall to earth through a hole ripped in the sky, Bucky Barnes is pulled from the rubble of the Battle of New York by a mysterious man wearing a costume and a cowl.

The next day, he wakes up in the hospital and makes a new friend named Steve Rogers - a certified weirdo with a deck of cards and plenty of time on his hands.

A postcard, a text, and a thousand miles of asphalt later, Bucky’s still trying to understand the man who came from the stars.

Steve, meanwhile, is finally putting the journey ahead of the destination.

Sorry, Not Sorry

All Steve Rogers ever wanted was to do what’s right. So when he drops in to volunteer at the Brooklyn VA Outpatient Center, he’s surprised to learn some veterans actually resent Captain America and everything he represents. One veteran in particular is determined to make sure Steve understands just how much he dislikes him.

Stop interrupting my grinding series

“I tried to call Sam,” Captain America says, bewildered. He’s sprinting like Usain Bolt and doesn’t sound even a little out of breath. Fucker. “Who’re you?”

“Someone who’s watching you live on TV,” Bucky tells him as the tiny patriotic figure on the screen takes the turns like he instructed. Bucky should probably be a lot more freaked out about this, but honestly? After a tour in the Middle East and six years as a nurse in New York, even this isn’t enough to ruffle him. One sees a lot of shit in the ER. “Also, you better hang up now, that thing is behind the next bend.”

“Uh, okay,” Captain America says. “Thanks?”

“Whatever,” Bucky says, disconnects the call and turns the TV off to get ready for his shift.

AU Fics

War, Children

After Bucky was released from the hospital, it only took him a couple of weeks to give up on himself. Difficult to believe in any kind of future when the simple act of staying alive was almost too big an effort.

Out the frosted window, across the street, there was a tiny homeless guy burrowing under an awning.

These streets Series

The life and times of Police Officer Steve Rogers and his dealings with the not so classy residents of his local precinct, including Bucky Barnes, the rough muscle with the dreamy blue eyes.

Proprietary Information Series

Okay, so Bucky Barnes has a crush on Steve Rogers. The guy’s gorgeous, talented and, oh yeah, the Chief Design Officer of the biggest tech company in the world. In other words: he’s so far out of Bucky’s league that he might as well be in a different stratosphere.

To Be Vulnerable Is Needed Most Of All

Steve is a shy comic book artist and meets his new neighbour, Bucky Barnes.

In which there are awkward longings, meddling best friends, comic conventions, heartache, lemons, video games, dorkiness, dancing and two cute boys.

The Daily Rogers

College AU. May contain exchange students, a Starbucks addiction, daddy issues, anger issues, closets and how to get out of them, the ever-ominous influence of social networks, various levels of betrayal, awfully poor life choices, but also, ultimately, real chunks of love.

we are the things we do for fun series

Going to a professional Dom may be one of the weirdest things Bucky’s ever done. Especially since this skinny Steve Rogers guy doesn’t really look the part.

But hey, they might just find a way to make this work.

Additional Steve/Peggy/Bucky fic because it’s mildly life changing

Better Than To Bend

In which Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes is tired, hungry and completely failing at not sticking it in the crazy. Also there’s a war going on or something.

aka world war threesome. Fear these queers.

Side-note: there is steve/bucky sequel that is amazing too and can (probably) be read as a stand alone

So, here you go Nonnies, sorry for the delay but i hope this makes up for it!! overall, really these are my bookmarked fics so check out my bookmarks for a couple more you might enjoy, otherwise i’ve found so many quality stucky fics by just going on the AO3 Bucky/Steve tag and then sorting by kudos, there’s such a range of humour, feels, angst and fluff !!! also most of these authors i’d also just rec every fic they write, so check them out!!

hope you enjoy and if you have any more questions i promise to try answer in a more timely fashion xoxo

In case you are completely new to the world of traveling, then you may be believing that some easy methods to journey better and less dangerous can help you immensely to help you take pleasure in your journey very much earlier. The following are some tips to obtain started off with the touring ideas.

When you are traveling, boost your safety as well as your reassurance by wearing a cash belt. This item is just one essential that you can not go without having when you are traveling, and is barely noticeable to wear. Make your pocket and your passport safe with your cash buckle so that whatever happens, they don't go missing. When you are traveling, the experienced tourist will be on the lookout for nearby dining places. A chain diner, even a single belonging to an international chain the traveler will not know, will never be as colorful being an individually controlled eatery. Not only are locally-owned eating places a lot more unforgettable, they may be commonly less than more common alternatives. Use best gides of croatia totes to bring along a lot more in your bring-on travel luggage. Looking to match every little thing you'll requirement for your holiday into a hold-on-measured travelling bag can be difficult. To improve the space, use vacation vacuum bags for the clothing. You put in your clothing, zip the handbag, and roll it to remove the atmosphere. Be sure that you unpack as soon as you get to your vacation spot which means your clothing have time to return to their typical design. In the event you usually journey a whole lot, a great action to take is purchase a postcard from each and every new location. Collect your post cards within a picture album (they are the same dimension since the common photograph) and create the days on the back again once you went there. This will help make your vacation memorable and give you some nice photographs to search again on. Should you be making kids with friends or family when you are aside on a trip, make sure to leave significant documents like medical insurance greeting cards along with a notarized letter, saying their caregiver has your expert to help make health care choices. They made need these details if you have a health care urgent. Stay away from securing your self in a inflexible timetable when traveling with the youngsters to your theme park vacation. Keep in mind that the real level is always to have some fun not endure a marathon as you competition in one trip or destination to the next. Review the itinerary using the youngsters the week just before the journey and enable every select a few specific actions they genuinely wish to do. Focus your entire day on producing all those desires become a reality and blend other activities as time allows. A mid-day time crack having a return to your motel for sleep as well as a go swimming within the pool area can offer an opportunity for some satisfying family downtime. In case the cleanliness from the resort you have chosen is a concern for you, use a thoroughly clean T-shirt like a pillowcase. Whilst you might be unable to correct the bedding, you can at least keep clothed. Your facial skin is what you need to protect the most, so generally have a clear t-shirt readily available! When choosing getting a great look on the feet whenever you go over a aircraft drive, remember that you may be most secure in boots that fall away effortlessly. Crocs or change flops are best simply because they may be taken off or place on immediately. When making traveling resort lodging make sure you call in advance and talk to somebody in the resort. Find out about their pet plan to learn if they enable domestic pets and in case it costs more charges for animals. This enables you to go with a resort that suits well for you if you are vacationing with household pets or sensitive to household pets. Should you be trying out a brand new bistro on your moves, watch the way the other people take action. They can provide you with signs regarding the best way to consume unusual food or which condiments to work with in your meals. This is notably helpful when having international, in which your meals are possibly very different from what you are utilized to. Prior to deciding to vacation out of your nation, make certain your immunizations are typical up to date. There's no chance to know regardless of whether your other tourists are typical present on their photos, or what ailments they may unknowingly be carrying. Keeping yourself vaccinated may help protect you any ailments you might encounter. Do not acquire your medicines from their labeled bottles. You will probably find oneself in danger at security should you not possess the correct medication inside the properly labeled containers. You can find stringent legal guidelines regarding substance trafficking and supplements out from the appropriate bottles may possibly bring up undesirable suspicion. In the event you vacation smartly and utilize these guidelines, you will be able in order to avoid several of the typical inconveniences encountered by unskilled travelers. So, when you decide to go on your own journey, take these tips and also have the time of your life.

The Most Common australian travel planner Debate Isn't as Black and White as You Might Think

What do you believe of whenever you hear the term Australia? Kangaroos, beaches, and ‘g’working day mate’? Nicely Indeed, Australia does have its honest share of ‘roos, even so the land Down Beneath gives A great deal in excess of that! We’re conversing awe-inspiring mountains, epic street trips, tremendous countrywide parks, beautiful waterfalls…the record genuinely is infinite. We’ve rounded up some leading Aussie travel bloggers who've presented us their ideas concerning the ideal spots to visit in Australia – and you may be certain that whatever you’re searching for with your excursion, Australia can offer you it and much more. Continue reading for 24 of the best spots to visit in Australia!

New South Wales

Victoria

Queensland

Northern Territory

Western Australia

Tasmania

South Australia

Finest areas to go to in New South Wales

1. Blue Mountains

Ideal Sites To go to In Australia - Blue Mountains

Advised by Rachel and Jeremy from your Kiwi Few

Should you’re searching for a dose of mother nature, the Blue Mountains are to suit your needs. Just one.five several hours from the hustle and bustle of Sydney, it could be visited as per day trip or even a weekend getaway, determined by your journey time frame. Ensure you have enough time to go to Wentworth Falls. This spot delivers walks of various trouble with beautiful views with the waterfall, and it’s just a brief drive from the leading celebration – The A few Sisters. These well known rock formations are definitely the spotlight of the picturesque postcard space.

When you head to Echo Point you can obtain an epic see of them, or hop on Scenic Globe’s gondola. When you’re there, don’t overlook the Scenic Railway – the steepest passenger railway on the earth! Very last but not least, Lincoln’s Rock is a necessity. With views in the vast landscape and also a magic formula minimal cave great for watching the sunset, it’s the most effective finish to the day.

Blue Mountains hostels from $seventeen.80 an evening

2. Bathurst

Ideal Places To go to In Australia - Bathurst

Recommended by Tara from The place Is Tara

Bathurst is one of my favourite spots in Australia for numerous factors. One of them is usually that my cousins have farms to choose from. They allow me to keep When I go through and produce me to cattle markets, that is an actual novelty to me owning developed up in the town. The opposite rationale I really like Bathurst is mainly because it is frequently missed by travelers, Inspite of acquiring a lot to offer. It’s the oldest inland town in Australia and is the site of the original Australian gold rush.

Visit the T-Rex within the Australian Fossil and Mineral Museum, take a spin within the well known Mount Panorama Circuit. Or simply grab a cup of espresso from Campos, have a stroll by means of Machattie Park and take a look at the commemorative plaque from Charles Darwin’s go to in 1836. For a unique working day excursion from the Bathurst region check out the gold rush city of Sofala (it appears like a ghost city and has a terrific e book shop), or head to the Jenolan caves for a few normal natural beauty, limestone-type!

Sydney hostels from $fifteen a night

3. Sydney

Very best Destinations To go to In Australia - Sydney

Proposed by Rachel and Jeremy within the Kiwi Few

Sydney is the most important metropolis in Australia – full of stunning beaches, enjoyable pursuits and good foodstuff. One of the better approaches to perspective The great thing about Sydney is by getting a calming stroll. A tremendous Seaside wander, and among the best, is from Bondi Seaside to Coogee Beach front. It provides stunning sights of the region’s well-known rocky beaches, thin seashores and sandy beach locations. A further well-known stroll is together the Sydney Harbour Bridge walkway. Both of those walks are cost-free and therefore are a great way to take pleasure in Sydney.

We really like finding up superior and seeing cities from previously mentioned. An ideal way To achieve this in Sydney is by undertaking the Skywalk at Sydney Tower. At 268 metres significant, it’s sure to Get the coronary heart pumping. You’re harnessed in however so it’s not (way too) Frightening! And finally, a must do of Sydney will be to consume your coronary heart out. Attempt a deep fried Golden Gaytime ice cream from Just what the Fudge Cafe, you gained’t regret it!

Sydney hostels from $15 a night

four. Byron Bay

Most effective Destinations To go to In Australia - Byron Bay

?@eloisejulier

Recommended by Dane from Holiday From Exactly where

Byron is among Australia’s prime vacationer Locations but in the event you’re willing to put in just a little perform you'll be able to even now uncover some extra very well concealed gems just out the back during the hinterland mountains. From many waterfalls and swimming holes to outstanding mountains and bush walks this smaller area conceal a lot elegance. I'd advise commencing with a hike to the bottom of Minyon Falls for your swim, a hike to the top of Mt Warning for an unbelievable sunrise, A different swim at Killin Falls after which you can a hike into the Normal Arch. They're just many of the most available but there is so a lot more when you’re willing to discover.

Byron Bay hostels from $25 a night

Very best spots to go to in Victoria

five. Melbourne

Very best Spots To Visit In Australia - Melbourne

Encouraged by Aditi from Diary of a Cusp

Melbourne has secured its spot of by far the most liveable city on earth the seventh time in the row. Most days see a different weather conditions – hail, sunshine, rain, wind – but that doesn’t impede the livelihood of Melbourne. Any offered working day you'll find an occasion, an show, a music gig, or even a present to relish. You obtain usage of cost-free trams within the metropolis circle to wander across without outlaying a buck on transportation. Melbourne is actually a multicultural metropolitan with copious eating places serving slavering foods and cafes for the caffeine resolve – Melbourne’s coffee is a lot of the most effective in the world.

Melbourne hostels from $eighteen an evening

6. Wonderful Ocean Highway

Very best Locations To Visit In Australia - Terrific Ocean Road

Recommended by Jack and Jenn from Who Requires Maps

Lorne is a popular halt along The good Ocean Street (and to the Twelve Apostles). It’s the ideal spot to chill out together the seaside, probably Opt for a surf, eat many of the finest fish and chips, and enjoy the surroundings. Jack is often a surfer and loves to head out to the Great Ocean Highway for any surf. Nevertheless the journey isn’t full with out a stop in Lorne for any parma in addition to a pot put up-surf. Lorne also has some wonderful walks and waterfalls to investigate, like Erskine Falls and Phantom Falls. My favourite, is for those who go in the course of the correct time, you may catch a number of whales at sunset. Get a wine at a seaside cafe and enjoy the serenity.

7. Mornington Peninsula

Greatest Locations To go to In Australia - Mornington Peninsula

Suggested by Aditi from Diary of the Cusp

Mornington Peninsula is a peninsula located southeast of Melbourne, just an hour push from the city. It has been an immensely well known working day trip or staycation web-site for your people of Victoria, In particular Melbourne for decades now. Mornington Peninsula has much to supply to its people – beach locations, national parks, scenic sights, soothing spas, vineyards, golfing courses, mazes, camping web-sites and so considerably more. This myriad of activities and the temporary distance causes it to be so desirable to visit for the duration of extensive weekends like Queen’s Birthday, Christmas, Boxing Working day, New 12 months and so forth. Sampling some Pinot Noir even though in the peninsula is essential.

Very best locations to go to in Queensland

eight. Sunshine Coastline

Ideal Destinations To go to In Australia - Sunshine Coast

Advised by Sophie from Adventures of Soph

The Sunshine Coast has received to be one of the most beautiful strips of coastland in all of Australia, boasting attractive, very long white beach locations lined with overall health acutely aware cafes and boutique garments retailers. Any time you aren’t absorbing the sunshine on one of many a lot of shorelines, it is possible to head out into the hinterland for each day of mountain mountaineering or hop off the crushed monitor to find out secluded swimming holes and waterfalls with not a soul in sight. Noosa National Park and fairy pools can be an complete have to do, just avoid the midday rush of your crowds.

Sunshine Coast hostels from $twelve.50 a night

nine. Brisbane

Best Places To go to In Australia - Brisbane

@anitababic3

Advisable by Erica from A Girl Who Wanders

Brisbane is my hometown and a spot I intend on remaining for an exceedingly very long time. Why? As it has every thing! Unlike its cash city counterparts of Sydney and Melbourne, Brisbane presents all the benefits at a portion of the associated fee. Higher on my listing of areas to go to is Southbank, the home of performing arts and Queensland lifestyle as well as back again alley bars and river entrance dining. Southbank also functions Australia’s only inner-town Seaside, a person-created marvel which requires you away from the hustle and bustle of the city and into a tropical oasis with glowing waters and white, sandy shorelines.

West Conclude is yet another suburb I hugely advocate viewing, with its hipster vibe, insanely great espresso and Road markets to keep you buying hrs. In the event you’re following a perspective of the town from the top rated, head up to Mt Coot-tha for its spectacular 360 sights of town plus the bordering hinterland. I also highly endorse climbing the Brisbane Story Bridge For an additional Particular addition for your excursion, since the look at is beautiful plus the adrenalin rush a single to not be skipped!

Brisbane hostels from $fifteen a night

ten. Gold Coastline

Very best Spots To Visit In Australia - Gold Coast

@scottypass

Recommended by Erica from A lady Who Wanders

When you’re looking for a vacation spot that has it all, research no further more and have on your own on the Gold Coast! With arguably a few of the very best beaches in Australia, the Gold Coast is my “go-to” location during the warm summer months months. However, if lazing about on smooth, white sandy beaches or swimming while in the crystal distinct ocean doesn’t consider your fancy, the Gold Coastline Hinterland is only a brief drive with the Seashore and has some of the most awesome walking tracks and viewpoints in Queensland.

My favourite issue regarding the Gold Coastline is how the vibe is amazingly laid back nevertheless also electric powered, with locals and travelers alike making the most of the “Sunday sesh” atmosphere with the day as well as the social gathering scene that involves lifestyle as soon as the Solar goes down. In case you’re organizing on going to the Gold Coastline anytime shortly, my particular suggestions for the top destinations to visit are Burleigh Heads Seaside and the Lamington Nationwide Park.

Gold Coastline hostels from $21 an evening

eleven. Airlie Seashore/Whitsundays

Greatest Places To go to In Australia - Whitsundays

@jessea_h

Advisable by Jack and Jenn from Who Desires Maps

Airlie Seashore is a great location to get a flavor of everything. It is possible to embark on an journey to The good Barrier Reef, sail into the Whitsundays, consume a few of the freshest food items straight out of your ocean, and wander a number of the most attractive coastal walks in Australia. Did I mention there are numerous magnificent beer gardens?

Airlie Beach is a perfect hub to meet other backpackers who have a hankering for journey. We had a lot of enjoyment occurring a myriad of nautical adventures. We even husked our own coconuts and played with turkeys and wallaby’s over the island. Airlie Seashore is additionally known for its man-manufactured lagoon, an excellent place for beachside/poolside cocktails.

Airlie Beach front hostels from $28 a night

12. Noosa

Greatest Destinations To Visit In Australia - Noosa

@emelianjellachas

Suggested by Fanny from Minka Guides

Increasing up, I generally heard about Noosa from other Australians as this desire coastal desired destination. Staying with the place, I didn’t seriously understand why until eventually I eventually visited a few 12 months back and fell in enjoy. Compared with many other iconic coastal cities, Noosa isn’t full of towering skyscrapers And big buying malls. Actually, the local council don’t Allow any one Make higher when compared to the trees, making certain that this sub-tropical town retains its incredibly stunning seaside city vibe – whilst also being an amazingly well-liked place to go to!

The principle Seaside could possibly get really active with sunbathers, so I’d advise carrying out a trek by means of nearby Noosa Nationwide Park to at least one of its stunning and deserted stretches of sand. A 45-minute wander alongside the Tanglewood Keep track of will take you to definitely Alexandria Bay, where by little, translucent fish swimming while in the shallows (and also the occasional nudist) are your only corporation. Absolute paradise.

Noosa hostels from $24 an evening

13. Atherton Tablelands

Best Areas To go to In Australia - Atherton Tablelands

Encouraged by Sophie from Adventures of Soph

Think infinite waterfalls, rolling inexperienced hills dotted with dairy cows and rustic, family operate cafes. All inside of an hour’s drive from Cairns, the Atherton Tablelands is the right gateway on the countryside, regardless of whether it's for a day trip or for a long weekend. The best way to begin to see the Tablelands is usually to hop in a car, seize a place map and just drive. The waterfall circuit of Elinjja Falls, Millaa Millaa Falls and Zillie Falls are not to be missed and if you materialize to end up there on the final Saturday in the thirty day period be sure you look into the Yungaburra marketplaces.

Atherton Tablelands hostels from $25 a night

14. Townsville

Most effective Places To go to In Australia - Townsville

Suggested by Sam from Sam Around The World

Boasting palm laden Seashore fronts, a ninety% chance of sunshine and heat temperatures all 12 months round, Townsville is surely an absolute should on any North Queensland itinerary. Wander the strand and understand abundant WWII heritage or have a vacation to The good Barrier Reef and dive the S.S Yongala shipwreck – it’s australia tour package from singapore probably the greatest dives on this planet. And it doesn’t cease there, the city is property to your vivid nightlife, a formidable food stuff scene and easy accessibility to the beautiful Magnetic Island. When you time your vacation ideal you’ll have the prospect to knowledge one of many islands notorious complete moon functions!

Townsville hostels from $18 a night

fifteen. Cairns

Greatest Destinations To Visit In Australia - Cairns

Advised by Nicola from Polka Dot Passport

There are not many sites in the world where you can devote your early morning snorkelling through a vibrant underwater playground that is an element of the entire world’s most important solitary framework of living organisms, as well as your afternoon dipping into turquoise drinking water holes, canopied by Probably the most various and oldest rainforests in the world. Cairns is actually a gateway to not 1 but TWO organic world heritage web sites, the Great Barrier Reef as well as the Daintree Rainforest, rendering it a pretty Distinctive spot to visit. Don’t leave devoid of executing a horse experience together Cape Tribulation beach, taking a visit out into the GBR or heading croc-recognizing together the Daintree River.

Cairns hostels from $twelve an evening

sixteen. Whitehaven Beach front

Finest Sites To Visit In Australia - Whitehaven Seashore

Advised by Dane from Holiday From Wherever

Whitehaven Beach front can be a 7km extend of Coastline located in the Whitsundays. It really is most easily accessible from Airlie Beach front, Except you might be lucky more than enough to possess a yacht. The Seaside is well known with locals and vacationers alike but if you end up picking to camp there you'll have the Seashore all to your self and just A few other Fortunate campers for sunset and sunrise. The white colour in the sand as well as the extraordinary blues in the drinking water make this A very unique location that is consistently sighted in virtually every ‘greatest Beach front on the planet list’.

Cairns hostels from $12 an evening

Greatest places to go to in Northern Territory

17. Uluru

Ideal Destinations To Visit In Australia - Uluru

Advised by Crystal from Castaway With Crystal

Uluru is probably Australia’s most recognisable landmark. But this huge chunk of rock can be really sacred for the local Anangu Aboriginal men and women in this article, an area of excellent electric power. It is the centre of your universe and the home from the ‘Earth Mother’. Inside the outskirts of Uluru, in just small caves, Aboriginal rock artwork is usually viewed that may be tens of thousands of a long time aged. They are regarded as nationwide treasures and Uluru is usually a UNESCO Earth Heritage internet site.

Though you may continue to climb to the highest in the rock and expertise the definitely magical sights, doing so is some extent of controversy among the area Aboriginal individuals as well as the countrywide park services that manages the region. Due to this, tourists are intensely inspired never to climb. Uluru rises 348 meters previously mentioned the ground, but the bulk of this rock lies underground. It has a circumference of sixteen kilometres and will be walked close to in total utilizing a cleared route.

Alice Springs hostels from $27 a night

eighteen. Darwin

Best Locations To go to In Australia - Darwin

Advisable by Edit From Edit Throughout the world

Although Darwin will be the money metropolis from the Northern Territory, it is rather smaller – but it really’s actually a great place for browsing. Moreover, for history fans, it’s a true treasure city With all the Museum and Art Gallery of your Northern Territory and several aboriginal art galleries. Conversely, experience seekers can check out the Crocosaurus Cove, wherever the Cage of Loss of life experience gives the thrill of currently being in a similar surroundings, a lot more precisely in the Specific cage within the water, together with a 5m long croc. Crocodile can even be discovered on a lot of cafe menus around Darwin. From crocodile sandwich to croc pizza, The range is substantial and very delectable. It tastes relatively like hen, but it really comes in a Substantially bigger cost.

Using a tour within the Adelaide river gave me the chance to begin to see the tactics on the crocs after they’re preparing to assault. Litchfield

A VERY LONG WAY HOME

In the last month we have covered a gruelling 3,000km, reaching the northern extreme of our yearʼs adventure, before turning tail towards home. By August we have made our way through 25 countries, finally coming full circle. Itʼs a journey that has spanned glaciers, mountains, fjords, and volcanoes. From the desert heat of Morrocco to the midnight sun of the Artic Circle.

One thing I always wondered about this trip was what it would be like when our return date became imminent. Should we come back at all? And If we did, would we revert immediately into the same patterns? Or will the experiences prove to have changed us in some fundamental way?

Weʼve still got TWO WEEKS left (gulp!), so I canʼt be sure yet. But I think the signs indicate we are not the same as a family. For one thing Iʼve realised there is not just one way to live your life. There are many and varied possibilities. And living an itinerant existence in a camper van happens to be one of them - a perfectly sustainable one at that. Financially, thereʼs no pressing need to come home. We could afford to keep going. By renting out our house and holiday cottage in Tenby, it more than covers our expenditure. We actually spend LESS by not working. That may sound bizarre, but itʼs true. We spend less because we consume less. Marcus has become the watch guard for anti-consumerist, keeping a steely eye for any signs of weakness on our part.

Even in a country like Norway, which EVERYONE will tell you is “super expensive”, itʼs not impossible to live cheaply, if you have time and a bit of creativity. Supermarket prices are probably three times that of the UK, but in this vast wilderness there is plenty to be had for free. You donʼt need a license to fish in the fjords, and in the north especially, the fish are easy prey.

Shortly after crossing the imaginary line of the Artic Circle, we entered Norway from Northern Sweden. Immediately the landscape ramped up. Gone were the flat forests of fir scored with lakes. In their place were towering mountains with spidery waterfalls spilling straight from the heavens. Trying to outrun the rain, we pushed on to Bodø, to catch a ferry to the legendary Lofoten Islands. Weʼd heard tales of their majestic beauty, and a friendly Norwegian family we met on board the 4 hour crossing helped set the scene. At over 2m tall with long flowing flaxen locks, their eldest son looked exactly like a Viking, and regaled the girls with tales of trolls, notably, “Espen and the Ashes”. His appearance set the stage perfectly, for nowhere on earth could I imagine more Viking-worthy than that first sighting of the Lofoten Islands as they hove into view. A long string of razor sharp peaks spanning across the horizon like the scale-spiked spines of a gigantic sea monster. I have navigated the girls through Roman, Greek and now Norse mythology. And Lofoten struck me as uniquely mythical - the physical embodiment of the Midguard Serpeant, coiling itself around the Earth.

In three weeks of travelling we have seen no part of Norway which is not indescribably beautiful. Every road is a scenic smorgasbord. Every angle, every viewpoint, just breathtaking in its scale and raw, naked beauty. But even against all this, the Lofoten Islands loom large in a league of their own. They make you feel invincible somehow. A heady combination of 24 hour summer sunlight mingled with prehistoric mountains rising vertically from the sea. When the sun is shining you can hike day or night. Itʼs not unusual to spot midnight walkers, scrambling up the snaggle-toothed peaks for a view of the world spread-eagled before them. One morning I wake restless at 5.30 am, and slip out of the van to climb Reinebringen. A tough, vertical scramble, but one which rewards you with a picture-postcard view from the summit, and the sight of a sea eagle circling below.

There are harbours sheltering beneath the bulk of these impressive cliffs, flecked with grass-roofed red rorbeurs (fishermanʼs cabins standing on stilts) and giant wooden A-frames. Closer inspection revealed the purpose of these industrial-sized drying racks. For the waters around here are known for both their treachery and their abundance of cod, who come in droves to lay their eggs during the winter. The writer Jules Verne spawned the idea for his book, “Journey to the Centre of the Earth” after witnessing the maelstrom (whirlpool) off the coast of the Lofoten Isles. And long before the discovery of North Sea Oil, Norwayʼs liquid gold came from the cod liver oil harvested from these shores. We visited a quaint little fishing town called Å, where all the buildings have been turned into a museum. Peering at traditional boats, nets and glass buoys, and reeling back in horror at the stink from barrels of fermenting cod liver. One hundred years ago, black and white picture frames record a horizon packed tight with fishing boats. The flotilla then would land 70,000 cod. Now the catch is much smaller, but still large enough for every town to dry hundreds of fish on giant racks in the traditional way. At this time of year only the staring eyes and papery heads remain. Someone told us the stockfish gets shipped to Spain and Portugal as salted cod, or bacalao. The lower-value end is destined for Nigeria, as a delicacy for soups.

There are no roads crossing the sprawling islands. Instead cars skirt the edges, looping and lacing from one land mass to the next. At times this network is so narrow it becomes a series of stepping stones, made possible only by tunnels which take you below sea level. We hammered home those Norse stories by visiting a Viking museum in Vestagoy, and reach our most northerly point at Unstad, where Marcus layers up with whatever he can find to surf the Artic. He has neither wetsuit hood nor gloves, but stays in much longer than we expect, emerging only somewhat pinked to declare the water is no colder than winter back home in Pembrokeshire.

One day we hike over a mountain to the remote Kvalvika beach. Another walker tells us two friends made a documentary here, “North of the Sun”, about their experiences living for an entire winter on their own. As we straddle the pass the drop below reveals a beach encircled with cliffs shrouded in mist. The clouds act like a curtain call, hanging low, setting the scene, nature at its most dramatic. We spot a little hobbit house and long drop loo on the beach, remnants from the film; a story of human survival. For the first time we wish we could ditch the van, and go off for longer on foot. Norway and Sweden both have a policy of the individual having a “right to camp”. For this reason, itʼs normal to see a tent pitched pretty much anywhere - by a fjord, on a beach, even atop a mountain. Iʼm suddenly aware weʼre just not properly kitted out for this environment. We have “the worldʼs worst shoes” for one thing. A paltry hotchpotch of non-waterproof specimens. And no wet weather gear, aside from one pair of kids fishermanʼs trousers we picked up in a charity shop which are 2 inches too short. At €34 for a round of coffee and cakes, Norway isnʼt the country for a spending spree to get “kitted out”. Instead we brave the rainy days and scale back our ambitions. Crossing back to the mainland, and winding our way South, we stop at Svartisen glacier, bathing in the ice cold milky waters beneath. Itʼs a boat crossing plus a 2 hour walk to reach the glacier, and itʼs hard to get a sense of scale until youʼre up close. But the sight of those spearmint blue crevices get the girls declaring it was well worth it. “Like Elsaʼs Palace up close,” Elsie muses. Norway has notched up our ferry total to 19. The whole coastline is like a gigantic lung, fed by a fine weave of arteries - the fjords stretching impossibly far inland. The only way to navigate them at points is to take a ferry hop across. The main road, the E6, is said to be the longest in Europe and though the drives here are long they are never boring. It takes you past thundering rivers and sweeping fjords, over steep mountain passes where islands of snow meet lakes. Their white lips curled up distastefully by the waterʼs edge, in defiance of fate. Itʼs so utterly uncompromising in all it offers, our only difficultly proves finding somewhere off the main road to camp - suitably “off the beaten track” so to speak. There are the scenic highlights - the world-famous Geiranger Fjord, where giant cruise ships sit dwarfed alongside the multi-storey cliffs above. The fairytale wooden stave church in Lom, itʼs Viking iconograpghy from the very dawn of Northern Christianity. The “Troll Road” - a series of 11 hairpin bends taking you past architectural buildings every bit as breathtaking as the scenery. In between all this, our days are spent fishing, canoeing and cooking. Elsie and Lulu have become hooked on old episodes of Ray Mears given to us by the friend we stayed with in Bulgaria, Cen Rees. The slow-paced TV series about Bushcraft inspires us all to hone our outdoor skills. Marcus becomes a dab hand with line fishing, striking out and catching us mackerel, cod and pollock each night. Itʼs been several months since weʼve been able to cook off our stove in the van. North of Greece, the gas canisters we needed became first sparse, then disappeared altogether. Our outdoor COBB BBQ has become our salvation. One day I channel my inner Ray and idly speculate whether itʼs high time I became accustomed with this bit of kit, rather than sitting back and waiting for Marcus to sort it out. Drawing Lulu aside, I announce that “Mummy is doing supper tonight,” followed by a plaintive, “Do you want to help?” She readily agrees, and to my delight, coaches me through the entire process. “Not like that, donʼt put the charcoal on yet....errm, actually birch bark makes better tinder than paper..etc” I decide we need shelter and begin grappling with our awning for the first time in 11 months. It wonʼt unfold properly, what the hell? “I think it pulls out like this,” Lulu gaily exclaims, manipulating it effortlessly beneath me. “How do you know all this stuff?” I ask her. With no hint of guile, she replies, “I just watch Daddy.” My culinary efforts are not great. The result is a strange burnt tasting tomatoey egg soup, which is unanimously rejected and immediately earns a place in the family folklore of terrible meals. Still, itʼs a start, and, as Ray will tell you, the secret of good bushcraft is not giving up. After weʼve poached, fried, curried and smoked as much fish as we can, we put the BBQ to further use, experimenting with making waffles and donuts, supplemented with wild raspberries and strawberries. Marcus tries out advanced fire-lighting skills with mixed success. He fails to master the wood- friction bow method demonstrated with ease by Mr Mears. But his home-made WOOD GAS STOVE, using two tin cans and a fan is a roaring success. Powered purely by pine cones which the girls scramble to collect, we have the quickest cup of tea for months. In Jotunheim National Park despite having no crampons, outdoor trousers or proper walking boots, Marcus leaves us behind and attempts an ascent on the 2,500 metre high Galdhøpiggen, Norwayʼs highest mountain. He manages just, but it proves somewhat of a challenge. Five hundred metres from the summit he is walking knee-deep in snow wearing shorts and water-logged boots. People openly stop to laugh and point. One shouts, “Ah, true Viking style!” By night we befriend a lovely Belgian family with two teenage sons. Weʼre pretty smooth operators on making auspicious acquaintances now. After spying them struggling to keep their fire going with wet wood, we send Elsie out to offer them a fan and some assistance. A few hours later, the kids are eating marshmallows and weʼre sipping on Belgian beer (which tastes a lot better than the stash of Polish beer we stockpiled before coming into Scandinavia). For the next few days we become travelling companions, stopping off to fish and camp together, navigating down from Kaupanger to Gudvangen on the most intimate, up-close of Norwayʼs fjords, the UNESCO-listed Naeroyfjord. Saying goodbye to the Belgians, we make our way through the eerie boulder strewn mountain pass between Aurland and Laerdal, headed for Gol. Weʼve graduated from dropping in on long lost friends, to targeting friends of friends. Via Facebook Chris Urack puts us in touch with his Norwegian pal Thomas, who very kindly offers us the chance to stay in his mountain cabin. It turns out to be one of those romantic looking tar-stained log cabins, complete with itʼs own sauna. The type weʼd spent weeks gazing upon longingly. They sit squat in the valleys, blending in curtesy of their living, growing, grass rooves. Iʼm amazed and humbled by Thomas and his wife Monaʼs hospitality. Marcus and I joke that itʼs like WWOOFING but without having to do any work. “Weʼve morphed into CHOOFING,” I say. “Chatting on organic farms.” We left Norway behind a week ago and have spent the best part of that on the road, plummeting down through Sweden and across the bridge to Denmark, sighting the flat island of Salthomen and scores of wind farms far out to sea. Copenhagen is a welcome distraction, and for two days we stroll the canals, snack on Danish pastries and visit museums. The girls enjoy exploring “Christiannia” best - a kind of freetown autonomous commune pressed right up against prime real estate. Itʼs a bizarre enclave, of colourful DIY houses where cars are banned and we can zip about on bikes. But the sight of the notorious “Pusher Street”, where cannabis is sold openly in every strain, variety and conceivable form, casts a seedier shadow which we steer them away from. Throughout Denmark and Germany the girls endure long days driving, devising their own playlists on iTunes for us to listen to. Elsieʼs favourite trick is to try and sneak in a rogue track by U2 to really piss Marcus off. We meet a friendly German family in the Rhine Valley where we stop to cycle, sample Bratwurst, sauerkraut and schnitzel. The girls are so desperate for playmates they tend to hurl themselves at other kids, bombarding and climbing all over them. But as we enter back into the familiar territory of France I canʼt help thinking things are different to how they were a year ago. Travel has lit the touch paper on our sense of adventure. Itʼs inspired us to get properly prepared for all weather when we make it back to Wales, and strike out more often into the wilderness. Iʼve learned it is where we are happiest as a family. Iʼve also learned to listen and understand my children better. Just as an experiment, we showed Elsie and Lulu both a Bear Grylls programme on YouTube, letting them see his different approach to survival - all fast-paced fury and revolting edible experiences. Their reactions were polar opposites. We have one die-hard Ray Mears fan, and one would-be Bear Grylls. And thatʼs ok, more than anything since last September Iʼve learned to see these differences and embrace them.

Better Call Saul Rediscovers The Lost Art Of Letter Writing

In what appears to be early morning light, Jimmy -- in his good old University of American Samoa sweatshirt, with a hoodie over it -- reaches into the trunk of a car and pulls out a couple of gym bags, saying he thinks he has everything, but that if he forgot something, he'll "figure it out on the way." Kim, also dressed for leisure, stands next to the car, fiddling with her keys and not quite meeting Jimmy's eye as she checks, "You're back on Thursday." "Thursday, yeah," Jimmy confirms, seeming surprised and relieved that she's addressing him at all. "Unless we break down in Amarillo," he adds with a smile she does not return, instead making a Kimface and nodding. When he comes around to where she's standing, she quickly moves to close the trunk, but Jimmy proceeds nonetheless: "Kim, I want you to know, I don't take this for granted. It means a lot." Clearly, the answer Jimmy's hoping for -- if not expecting -- is something along the lines of "Don't mention it" or "You'd do the same for me" or "It's a small thing to ask of someone who loves you"...

AMC

...but Kim just nods again, icy, and says, "I'll see you Thursday," not seeming to look forward to it very much. Jimmy sets his jaw and -- seeing that he's not going to be sent on this journey through Amarillo with so much as a handshake, never mind a kiss goodbye -- leaves her to whatever responsible adult activity she might get up to while he's not around. I'm barely either of those things so I can only guess what that might be. ...Oil change???

Kim has dropped Jimmy at the Albuquerque Transit Center, and when we see him next, he's on a bus bound for Houston, sitting in a window seat. Next to him, one of his gym bags is open and positively bristling with the spoils of Kim's "Something Stupid" shopping spree. I would have 100% understood had its purpose been to bring some artificial sense of order to her own messy life -- Ask Me About My Stack Of Coil-Bound Sketchbooks And Boxes Of Reserve Uniball Vision Pens -- but no: what Kim has in mind is evidently going to require Jimmy to write a LOT of personal correspondence. He writes postcards. He writes cards. He writes in different pens and pencils. He arranges his fingers around his various writing implements in awkward positions to disguise his handwriting. He licks envelope after envelope. He flexes his hand to try to relieve cramps. When the bus picks up more passengers at some unidentified southwest outpost, an older guy stops at Jimmy's aisle and asks if he may take the seat on which Jimmy has set up his mobile office; Jimmy says sure, and starts to gather up his stuff, but warns, "I had a pile of cheese chili fries back at Stuckey's -- with onions on top. The last guy who sat here didn't last five miles but, you know, you're welcome to it." Jimmy's fellow passenger decides to move on and minimize his methane exposure, though regardless of which seat he ends up in, he is still on a mobile interstate fart canister. We eventually see that Jimmy has switched to the opposite side of the bus for the Shreveport-bound leg, the lone passenger still awake after dark, licking envelopes under the faint light above his seat. He gulps down a 5-Hour Energy. And when a new day dawns, we see that Jimmy is just one of many bus passengers scratching away at their correspondence. What a wild coincidence that Jimmy's ended up on a conveyance with so many other practitioners of this old-fashioned pastime!!! Jynetta, a teen in messy twin buns and a butterfly necklace, comes up the aisle to hand Jimmy a pile of note cards, out of their envelopes for him to review; he compliments her choice to put hearts over all her "i"s, and pays her a sawbuck for the ten cards she wrote, offering her the chance to do some postcards for 50 cents apiece, which she cheerfully accepts. OHHHHH, it's NOT a coincidence AT ALL. Bubba pops up from behind Jimmy with a smaller stack and receives with equanimity Jimmy's fearless feedback about coming across too angry: "Make it that you're-- You're sad that you even have to write the letter. 'I couldn't believe people could be so heartless until I heard about you' -- 'kay?" Bubba's with it, taking both a Lincoln for the five notes he wrote, and another batch of blanks. Jimmy then taps Chastity, a young woman across the aisle; unfortunately, she ignored Jimmy's direction to be respectful and doesn't get paid for a card filled with swears, which he regretfully tears up in front of her. An editor's job is tough, you guys.

Finally, Jimmy disembarks the bus at his final destination and walks into the post office in Coushatta, Louisiana, 71019. He's back out less than a minute later, sitting on a bench outside, ignoring the sweet pooch who wants to be his friend, and waiting for whatever's next -- which, for us, is the opening credits, in which a tie changes from garish lavenders to garish blues while being inspected by a passing tarantula. Even the tarantula doesn't want it.

Over to El Michoacano. Having apparently exhausted his sick days, Nacho's back at work -- and, in fact, is sitting in for Hector and watching over Domingo's shoulder as he takes dealer payments. Domingo also has to take dealer excuses: this dude, Blingy, casually says he's a little short due to a "dumbass festival over at the fairground -- Indian shit," which was lousy with rent-a-cops: "We're going to make it right next time." "You're goddamn right you are," says Domingo, eyes hard. "Fo' sho'!" chirps Blingy. "Next week." Domingo snaps the elastic band around the bills, dismissing Blingy, but Nacho would still like a word, and calls Blingy back when he's halfway to the door. In a show of shocking impertinence, Blingy lightly tells Nacho he has to go, but Nacho repeats the non-request, and Blingy comes over to the side of the table, asking what's up. Nacho just stares at him for a while and then blinks pointedly, at which Blingy leans down...whereupon Nacho yanks the giant hoop earring out of his right ear -- doing him a favour, honestly, because while I gather, with such a name, he feels he has a reputation to live up to, that shit is gaudy as hell. Domingo steals a tiny peek behind him as Blingy groans as quietly as he can, and Nacho calmly pulls out a wad of napkins; when Nacho moves the dispenser over to him, Blingy respectfully pulls a bunch to clean up the mess he rudely made spilling all his blood on Nacho's table. "What you owe, you owe with interest," murmurs Nacho. Blingy nods and scurries out. Domingo's clearly fucked up about this, but since he doesn't want any of his body jewellery removed so abruptly, he manages to kiss a little ass anyway, turning around to tell Nacho, "You had to do that, man! Guy's not going to learn otherwise." "Mmhmm," Nacho agrees. "So why didn't you do it." Domingo, looking terrified, gives this performance review one quick nod and, fortunately, has another dealer coming in to distract him.

After a long day of intimidating human parasites, Nacho drives his hot rod home -- and WHAT a home! My man lives in a very stylish Brutalist bungalow. Before he enters, we see who's waiting for him: a blonde, lying on a love seat and scratching at a glass pipe; and a brunette, lounging on an adjacent couch, picking her big toenail with one hand and flipping through channels with the other. She's just landed on a home shopping channel when Nacho opens the door and they both sit up to greet him, which is when we see the enormous piece of automotive pop art over the brunette's head.

AMC

I am not so much with the art and thought it could possibly be a real Roy Lichtenstein but, uh, no, it is clip art from Shutterstock. Anyway, both these women seem to be Nacho's girlfriend based on their greetings -- one calls him "babe" and is surprised he's home so early; the other offers to make him dinner -- but he has nothing to say to either of them, instead tossing them each a little sachet of drugs, to grateful grins. The brunette asks if he's going to smoke with them, but he doesn't answer that either, and we watch through the wall of glass as he goes through the house to his bedroom, past several other large-scale paintings. I don't recognize them and there isn't exactly a Shazam for art, so I can't tell you if these are actually significant pieces, but I think the point is that Nacho has chosen to spend his money on gracious living...and on red leather furniture for his drug-enthusiast lady friends. In the bedroom, Nacho locks the door, takes off his jacket, and sets his gun and an envelope of cash on his nightstand; when he strips off his shirt and his tank top rides up, we see the gunshot wound on his side has healed up nicely. Then, just to give you an idea of the kind of living well that should, on its own, be Nacho's best revenge, he crosses through his walk-in closet to ANOTHER CLOSET containing built-in shelves he is NOT EVEN USING; and a safe, which he opens. He's putting his things away when he knocks a clear plastic envelope onto the floor, and we see it contains a phony Manitoba driver's license with his picture on it. (I knew Michael Mando was Canadian so I thought this might be a cute nod to his birthplace, but no, he was born in Quebec City.) Pensively, Nacho picks up the sleeve and pulls out both "his" own ID and one behind it, for his dad, before clenching his jaw, flaring his nostrils, and locking them away again. I'll say this for making Manitoba part of your fake backstory: no one's going to fact-check the details you come up with because nooooooobody cares.

Then we're with Ziegler's crew as they get their promised R&R at, what else, a strip club. There, Kai (who else) is the first we see enjoying the attentions of one of its curvaceous performers. While the ladies work, Ziegler is sitting at a dark bar away from the action, looking very Lutheran, or possibly just bored; Mike stands with his back to some glass bricks, surveying the scene; apparently satisfied that the crew guys aren't embarrassing themselves or him, he comes over to Ziegler and exchanges some words we can't hear over the pounding music. Ziegler gets up, and after Mike stops at a bouncer and briefly confers with him as well, Mike leads the way to the door...

...and when we see them next, Mike and Ziegler have repaired to a much quieter pub and are chatting over beers. Ziegler volunteers that his father was also an engineer: "Learned the work by doing the work. Hands like knots of a tree." Mike smiles fondly. Ziegler points to something behind the bar and tells Mike his father built it. Surprised, Mike frowns: "The Sydney Opera House." "Those concrete arches -- impossible in 1957. Six years it took to solve the problem. Six. And years more to pour correctly. To that, my father gave ten years of life." The bartender comes by to take an order from a thirtysomething mop-haired dude, whose name we'll soon learn is Terry. The bartender remembers that his first drink was a stout and asks if he wants another one, but Terry says he wants to try the "hee fee wee sin." Ziegler can't stop himself from correcting Terry's pronunciation of "Hefeweizen" (more like "HAY-feh-VIE-zen," in case you don't want to be schooled by a real-ass German the next time you try to order one), and Terry amiably apologizes for mangling it, asking Ziegler to repeat it.

AMC

Mike doesn't look thrilled that Ziegler's engaging in this potentially memorable exchange, but also can't exactly put a stop to it without making it even more memorable than it already could be for Terry, and when Ziegler pays for Terry's beer and Terry goes on his way, Mike evidently decides to let it go without comment, and Ziegler returns to the subject they were discussing before Terry interrupted: "The Opera. It's for the ages. For my father, it was his achievement: the creation that will endure." Ziegler taps the glass with his nails to put a button on the conversation and asks Mike what his "papa" did. Mike snorts, "My dad? Ohhhh, left behind a cold water flat and a stack of bills, that's about all." "Not true!" gasps Ziegler. "He also left behind you, Michael! You are his legacy." This old-man friendship is extremely endearing, which therefore also makes it extremely worrisome for me personally given the many ways it could yet go wrong. For now: Mike laughs ruefully at Ziegler's sentimental framing of the elder Ehrmantraut's legacy before asking whether Ziegler ever thought about having kids. Ziegler looks down at his hands: "Once, maybe. My Margarethe, she's enough for me. She's my heart. This is the longest I've ever been away from her. Twenty-six years, never this long away from home." "To home," says Mike, tilting his glass at Ziegler's for a clink of agreement. They both sip, and before Ziegler can ask about MIKE's fatherhood, if he was going to, the bouncer from the strip club is at the door calling for Mike, who checks to make sure Ziegler will be okay at the chill bar without him before going to investigate...

...and finding out that of course Kai could not be trusted to stay out of trouble, has been escorted outside for touching a performer during a private dance, and is belligerently trying to argue that they can't kick him out because he paid for the dance AND to stagger past the bouncers restraining him to get back inside. The lead bouncer threatens to call the cops, at which Mike steps out of the shadows, telling the bouncer he doesn't need to do that, already getting his cash out. The bouncer, reasonably, wants to know who Mike is; Mike calmly tells him, "I'm the guy who's telling you this one's had too much and I'm here to get him out of your hair." The lead bouncer asks about Kai's buddies, and after Mike gets him to admit that they're behaving themselves, he hands over a couple of bills to secure their right to continue hanging out while Mike takes "this idiot" home. Kai then starts arguing with Mike, because he may be sexy but he is not very wise. "You are done," Mike tells him firmly. Kai sort of wavers like he's considering lunging at Mike, but when Mike urges him to try it, Kai summons the last of his wits and decides against it. After one of the secondary bouncers has dragged Kai off toward Mike's car, Mike deeply sighs, apologizes to the lead bouncer, and asks after the dancer; the lead bouncer says she's fine. Mike peels off some more cash "for her trouble": "All good?" The lead bouncer says, "We're cool." HE will never be as cool as Mike, but I don't blame him for trying to put them in the same category.

At the chill bar, Ziegler evidently got bored and is now sitting with Terry and his buddy, sketching schematics on the back of a coaster as he explains -- minus salient details, naturally -- the engineering challenges inherent in his current project. When Mike returns to retrieve Ziegler, he can't quite believe the loose-lipped spectacle he became in Mike's absence, but keeps cool by merely putting a hand on Ziegler's shoulder, almost imperceptibly pocketing the coaster, and telling him, "Time to go." Ziegler -- toasty from the beer, and enjoying having an audience to lecture avuncularly -- wants Mike to join them. Mike pointedly replies, "Your wife's calling?," and Ziegler is too drunk to get it at first, marveling, "My WIFE???" "...Yeah," says Mike. Ziegler locks in then and gets up, thanking his new young friends for their "hospitility."

Outside, Mike backs out of his parking space while Ziegler and Kai sit silently, careful not to do anything to make Dad more mad at them.

As Stereolab's extremely apropos "Tempter" plays on her headphones ("Midway between happiness and sadness boiling but not overflowing / fails to only make a better come back, more powerful and poignant and falls again / Destructive lust for life erected, on the verge pricked up like a picket / fearing to respond to the tempting but malevolent call of the other side"), Kim works intensely on Huell's file; the music's up so high that she doesn't hear Jimmy until he's leaning in to her face to get her attention. When she pulls off her headphones, he tells her he's going to the nail salon to "finish setting up"; she tells him that's a good idea and that she'll see him later, trying to forestall further conversation by putting her headphones back on immediately. Jimmy makes it almost to the door before turning back to see if she wants him to bring dinner home, but Kim is pretty clearly making a point to need as little as possible from him right now, saying she'll just "scrounge" but that he should do what he wants. He hesitantly lets her dismiss him.

At the shop, Mrs. Nguyen is on her way out for the night when she hears Jimmy sighing in his office and goes in to see what's up. Jimmy's surrounded by dozens of phones, all plugged into chargers, as he says he has to be there a bit longer but that he'll lock up when he leaves, if that's okay. "Wife mad at you?" she guesses. "She's not my wife," says Jimmy hoarsely, halfway between a haughty chuckle and a sob, but then admits, "I don't know." "Yeah, she's mad at you," says Mrs. Nguyen knowingly. She sidles back out into the hall and returns with a bottle of vodka, pouring him a generous belt: "Go on." Jimmy has just taken a bracing sip when Mrs. Nguyen delivers her happy not-wife, happy life advice: "You take her to dinner. Nice place, with a waiter. Cloth napkin. You bring flowers. You say 'sorry.' Then, say 'sorry' again. Whatever she says, you say 'sorry.'" It's a sexist cliché, but like...it also probably works about 90% of the time. Straight men should be more sorry in general, in my opinion, and white men? PLEASE. "I think we might be past that," murmurs Jimmy. Mrs. Nguyen doesn't bother telling him to say "sorry" even more, instead saying, "I'll leave the bottle." I feel like you can either be sorry or drunk, so this might be a high-level sabotage on Mrs. Nguyen's part. When she's gone, Jimmy carefully sticks a label on a phone and sets it on his desk. How many dang phones does one disbarred lawyer need?!

The next day, Kim is ponytailed for battle as she stalks through the courthouse halls, trailed by three young associates, and heads straight to Suzanne's office. Opening the door just a little, Kim pokes her head in to see if Suzanne's ready for her, since she's early; Suzanne checks her watch and waves her in, which is when Kim throws the door open and reveals her whole squad: Gary, Stef, and Pat. After a sidelong glare at Kim, Suzanne rises from her seat to shake everyone's hands, and then plops down to find out what form of baloney Kim's about to serve her. First, Kim responds to Suzanne's proffer: time served, three to six months' probation, and a plea to simple battery -- a misdemeanor, as Suzanne notes, before recapping that Kim's trying to go from eighteen months of jail time for Huell to zero: "Sorry, I can't do that." Kim accepts that, and turns to Gary for Act II: a motion for continuance, since they need more time to prepare their defense. The officer didn't canvass for additional witnesses, but businesses around the site of the incident have security cameras, and Huell's legal team will need to subpoena the tapes. Instead of addressing Gary, Suzanne rudely turns to Kim to ask if she doesn't think that's "a little much." Kim coolly says they doubt a judge will. Stef takes over to say they just want the most information they can get -- to wit, they're filing a motion for the cop's personnel file. "Good luck with that," sniffs Suzanne, once again to Kim...

AMC

...who is not rattled by Suzanne's attitude, like, at all. Pat adds that if the cop has a history of run-ins with anyone Huell ever knew, basically, they want to know. "You're thinking of pursuing civil litigation," Suzanne snits at Kim. "We are in conversation with the ACLU, assessing the possibility that Mr. Babineaux's civil rights may have been violated."

AMC

Suzanne looks like she almost respects it as she curtly says, "Okay. Is that all?" Kim gives her a brief Kimface before saying, with some portent, "For now." Suzanne gathers up all the motions, saying she'll deal with these issues and then set a trial date. And since she feels that's all they have to talk about, Kim and her crew pack up and prepare to leave -- but, of course, Suzanne would like a private word with Kim first. "You're throwing three $400-an-hour associates at a pro bono case?" "I never said this was pro bono," says Kim. Suzanne is completely gobsmacked and literally throws up her hands as she asks Kim what the plan is, here: "Because shock and awe isn't going to cut it. Bring every fancy associate you got, file all the motions you want, and at the end of all this, your client is still going away." "Okay," says Kim serenely. "I guess we'll see." Kim strides out with her usual perfect posture, betraying nothing...right up until she gets to the outer door of Suzanne's office; as she crosses the camera, we barely hear her take one slightly unsteady breath. Look, USPS. You've let us ALL down at one point or another in our lives. Do not fuck over Kim right now.

"Morning" "dawns" for Ziegler and his crew, who stagger through the warehouse to the truck seeming a bit more sluggish than usual but, generally, in good spirits. Ziegler's bringing up the rear as Mike stands between him and the truck for A Bit Of A Chat, which Ziegler doesn't seem to see coming, cheerfully telling Mike that "everyone seems much improved." Mike just stands there regarding Ziegler, who finally asks whether something's wrong. Respectfully waiting until the last of Ziegler's guys has boarded the truck, Mike reaches into his pocket and hands Ziegler the coaster he'd sketched on the night before. "This?" sputters Ziegler. "Don't be concerned. I said nothing! Men at a bar, talking to make talk, and look -- no details, no scale at all. Could be a skyscraper. Could be box for shoes." Not sure how many shoe boxes need load-bearing walls, but then I never bought any by McQueen. Ziegler smiles, endearingly but also naïvely, and when Mike just stands there continuing to gaze at him, Ziegler's face falls a little and he insists, "I said nothing about the construction that would not be true for thousands of others. By now they have forgotten me entirely." "They forgot," Mike repeats. "The German national in the middle of Albuquerque, talking about pouring hundreds of tons of concrete in a secret underground location." Well, sure, anything sounds bad if you describe it accurately. Ziegler, chastened, admits, "Yeah, you're right." He apologizes, saying he had too much to drink and "may have said" more than he should have. Mike takes a step into Ziegler's personal space to make his point emphatically and clearly: "The man we're working for is very serious. Think about the precautions we take to keep everything that goes on here quiet. Think about how much money you're making. Think about what happens if something goes wrong. Do you understand what I am saying to you." Ziegler gives Mike a long look and gravely replies, "I do understand. And I'm sorry to cause any problem." Instead of adding, "Please don't tell the man I'm working for that he should kill me," Ziegler holds up the coaster and promises, "You have my word, nothing like this will happen again." Keeping his eyes locked on Ziegler's, Mike snatches the coaster away and puts it back in his pocket, taking a long beat before telling Ziegler, "Okay. Let's get you to work." They might need to grab Ziegler some coveralls that haven't been very recently pissed in first.

Judge Munsinger's already at a 10 when he yanks open the door to his chambers and demands of Suzanne, standing there with Kim, "Are you prosecuting Santa Claus?" Suzanne has no idea what he's talking about, and follows him inside as he yelps, "It looks like Miracle On 34th Street in here." Indeed, his desk is covered with four plastic bags and two USPS bins filled with multi-coloured envelopes -- and, per Munsinger, this is just today's haul: "All addressed to me, all from some backwater in Louisiana?!" He pulls one from the top of the pile: "'Get your hands off our hero,' they say. 'Mercy for Huell Babineaux,' they say. What, like I'm sending him to the electric chair?" He asks whether Kim "started this particular ball rolling"; aghast, she says she certainly did not instruct residents of Coushatta, Louisiana to start writing letters to him. Technically correct, the best kind of correct! "That being said," Kim adds, "it's clear Mr. Babineaux has touched the lives of many people in his hometown." Since she is not an idiot, Suzanne can smell the bullshit, and furiously works her jaw as Kim goes on to say she knows that Coushattans are planning to send a contingent "to show their support during the trial." "You're talking about a bunch of yahoos packing my court?!" sputters Munsinger. Suzanne tries to suggest that they can just ignore all this and proceed with whatever trial strategy she had before she found out about the mail bombs, to which Kim says Suzanne shouldn't be surprised by the outpouring given that she knows Huell's history as well as she does. Munsinger announces that he doesn't want to get one more letter from "some swamp-dwelling do-gooder." (Jealous of wetlands much, New Mexico?) Suzanne thanks the judge for bringing the matter to her attention, and asks if she may take some of the mail. Munsinger presses a bag on her in addition to the bin she already had her eye on, and sends counsel off with a final warning: "I have looked at this case. It does not merit a circus. Now, you two WORK IT OUT." Kim primly says they've tried. "Try. Again," orders Munsinger.

AMC

Suzanne stares daggers at Kim, and though we don't see Kim's face in reaction, we may reasonably assume she DGAF.

Then we're in Suzanne's outer office as she starts yelling instructions to everyone around; she basically wants every available piece of data on Huell that exists in police and court records: "I want to figure out why a pickpocket has people this overheated." She opens a card on the top of the file and reads: "'Huell Babineaux is wrongfully accused. He's a good man. He'd never do nothing like the things you say he's done. He's a kind man and a good friend to everyone.' Jesus, they do make him sound like Santa Claus." One of her office underlings, Ben, hands her a card with a phone number on it, which she dials on speakerphone. It goes through to the voicemail of a rumbly Cajun gentleman who ends with "Have a blessed day," and she leaves a brief message. Various hands continue opening mail, and when Suzanne comes up with another phone number, she dials it and gets through to an Eloise Lockhard, who says everyone in Coushatta knows Huell, a pillar of Eloise's church. Suzanne asks which church that is, and when Eloise says it's Free Will Baptist on Bogan Lane, Ben quickly Googles, and as Suzanne's asking whether there's a particular reason Huell is so beloved by the congregation, Ben brings his laptop over to show her the church's homepage, which has been taken over by a fundraising call to action on Huell's behalf. When Eloise asks Suzanne to repeat who she is...

AMC

...we see that Jimmy's assembled his whole film crew for this project, and that Make-Up Girl is posing as Eloise, asking Suzanne to explain exactly what her role is in Huell's trial. Suzanne reluctantly admits that she's prosecuting him. "You're the one persecuting our Huell?" gasps "Eloise." "How could you? To go after someone so sweet and kind, with all those lies? Well, I'd tell you what I really think of you--" Cut to Jimmy, who directs her by silently folding his hands in prayer. "Eloise" resumes: "But Jesus is listening, so I'll just say, SHAME ON YOU!" She hangs up before Suzanne can defend herself, which gives Jimmy a chance to offer some feedback, calling Make-Up Girl's performance "not too shabby!" "I've been taking improv classes," she shyly replies. Oh, Make-Up Girl. If it's future income you have in mind, you'd be better off at beauty school.

Back at the office, Suzanne still has the church's homepage up, and decides to try to call its pastor, Blaise Hansford. This time Jimmy grabs the phone that's ringing and realizes it's the church; frantically, he motions for Sound Guy to cue up a CD labeled "Organ Music" before he picks up. Now, what happens next really cannot be properly conveyed in print, but both Jimmy and Bob Odenkirk are clearly enjoying the chance to bust out their Cajun accent in the service of bamboozling a prosecutor. Jimmy does some business with the organ music, claiming he's going to step out in the vestibule, and settles in for a nice chat. Suzanne tries again not to be too specific about her role in Huell's proceeding as she says she wants to know more about him. Jimmy says Huell is a lovely person, inside and out, and that while he might say the same about any of his parishioners, Huell is special, with "a heart as big as Lake Ponchartrain." Camera Guy shakes his head at this egregiously corny turn of phrase and indicates the whiteboard behind him, where Jimmy's high-level direction includes "Keep It Simple, Stupid," but Jimmy, of course, already knows all the rules well enough to break them and waves him off. Suzanne asks what Huell did to earn so much devotion from his brothers and sisters at Free Will Baptist, and "Pastor Hansford" takes the long way to tell her that Huell saved a bunch of elderly parishioners when a fire broke out during their Bible study by physically carrying each of them out of the building. When Suzanne asks what happened to the church, "Pastor Hansford" assures her that it's fine, and motions to Camera Guy, who does something on his laptop; Suzanne then hears a notification ding and turns to see the counter on Huell's fundraiser as more donations are added to the total. "Pastor Hansford" wraps it up: "Now, y'all sound like a real nice lady, and I know you're only doing your job, but I want you to understand something: I think you got the wrong end of the stick, here! Huell Babineaux is very important to us! Now, he-- He-- He would never hurt a police officer! I believe it's just a misunderstanding, and I-- I believe he might've been helping his friend, and that's the Huell that I know." "Pastor Blaise" then invents a distraction, telling Clarence the organist to put some robes away because they're for Communion...

AMC

...which is, I guess, when Sound Guy realizes Jimmy hasn't spent enough time in services to learn what various churchy words mean. Suzanne and "Pastor Hansford" are about to end the call when he asks whether there's a date for Huell's trial. She says there isn't, so he asks her to contact him when there is: "We got a couple of charter buses. Gonna bring the whole congregation up to y'all in Albuquerque." Suzanne wilts in resignation. Jimmy hangs up. The crew is in awe. Suzanne realizes she's fucked.

Jimmy then takes a moment to regard the desk full of silent phones. "Is it over?" asks Make-Up Girl. Jimmy tells them he's going to take the church phone with him in case Suzanne calls back. If any others ring, they should pick up every third caller, and talk no longer than thirty seconds per call. Camera Guy tries to weasel out of staying, but Jimmy, already literally half out the door, says they're paid for the day, so they'll stay until he tells them to go.

Jimmy, peering through the glass in the door, finds Kim in a courtroom, conferring with opposing counsel. We can only see her from the back, but Suzanne's body language -- hands on hips; chest in high dudgeon -- is tense and angry, whereas Kim leans back casually against the judge's bench, arms spread wide. Suzanne then tents her fingers on her table and hangs her head in defeat.

Jimmy's down the hall tapping his sneaker when Kim emerges from the courtroom and looks both ways before spotting him. Without speaking, she strides purposefully past the bench he's sitting on and into the stairwell, Jimmy following close behind. When they're alone and Kim's basically slammed the door, Jimmy seems to think things must have taken a turn after he stopped watching and anxiously asks, "Well?"

AMC

In response, Kim takes a breath, then chucks her briefcase onto the floor, shoves Jimmy against the wall, and kisses him voraciously. Let this be a lesson to us all: doing crimes makes you sexy.

Then the camera's panning up slowly from the foot of Kim and Jimmy's bed as we hear her suggest, "Do it one more time?" "Are you sure you can take it?" Jimmy flirts back. "I can if you can," she replies. "All right, you asked for it," Jimmy sing-songs...and then breaks into his Pastor Hansford character: "Hello dere! Look in your heart, chère, and find forgiveness! Let us take you on a trip down Naaaaaawlins way, where dey put a little extra roux in de gumbo!" Kim giggles that it's like she's in the bayou, to which "Pastor Hansford" replies that he's got crawdads in his pants. Kim cracks up, and then settles with her chin on Jimmy's chest, telling him the phones were genius. Jimmy says the phones were "a touch": "This was all you, start to finish. Bank shot off the judge. Four months probation, time served, is like watching Roy Hobbs smash out stadium lights." Kim modestly says that Suzanne overplayed her hand, then looks over Jimmy's shoulder at the clock radio and realizes she has to start getting ready for work. First, though, she asks what he's up to today; he tells her he's going to check out another office by the courthouse. Kim says she thought he'd found one, but he evasively says it was too big for him. Jimmy asks if she'll be working late, and she says she will, since she has work to catch up on post-Huell. Kim then decides she's dawdled enough and gets out of bed, turning on the shower. Jimmy remains in bed, looking thoughtfully at the space Kim's left next to him.

I really wish we'd gone from this scene back to the nail salon, Jimmy's camera crew having slept there after he forgot to release them because he was too busy fuckin', but no: we're in a conference room at Kim's office. Paige is droning on about boring bank shit while the camera stays on Kim and the quiet smile that plays across her lips as, obviously, she daydreams about the fun she had keeping Huell out of jail. When Paige gets to the end of her monologue, Kim blandly offers, "Sounds good," before resuming paying actual attention, saying they should talk about the Wyoming branch Mesa Verde wants to open in six months. Kevin passive-aggressively clears his throat, forcing Kim to ask if he has something else he'd like to discuss. He claims not to want to slow things down, particularly not with something he knows Paige doesn't want him to raise. Paige and Kim exchange a brief look before Kim's like, spit it out, so Kevin says that the Tucumcari branch is doing great, and it's probably because the design of the building is so distinctive, so even though Paige has already said it's impossible, wouldn't it be great if they could do something like that with the Lubbock branch? "I reminded Kevin that Tucumcari has a much larger footprint than the current Lubbock design, and that design is the one we've been hanging our estimates on," says Paige tightly, clearly afraid Kim is going to go back to her old ways of trying to impress Kevin by...working herself nearly to death. Kevin, of course, is hoping the opposite, and presses his point despite Paige's concerns. But no longer is Kim getting her adrenaline fix by doing anything in the financial sector, so she barely pauses before telling Kevin she's sorry, but that she agrees with Paige that starting over now would put them behind schedule. Kevin accepts Kim's judgment and admits that Paige was right this time. On to Wyoming! Kim is SUPER-PSYCHED jk she is about to slip into a coma.

Back in her office, Kim reaches into the top drawer of her desk, produces the souvenir Zafiro Añejo bottle topper, and contemplates it. Is she so pragmatic? Or would she rather do more sexy crimes???

Then we're under the laundry, where Mike is giving Gus a progress report, starting with the accident that happened in "Something Stupid" and how long it's going to delay the project -- less than a week, it sounds like. However, there's a gigantic rock where the elevator shaft is supposed to go, which will require blasting, adding another week on top of that. To summarize: "Best estimate, we're a little past the halfway point, way behind schedule. But the work is solid." Gus stares for a while, then asks about Ziegler. Mike takes a loud breath and says, "I gave him the come-to-Jesus. He screwed up, he knows it. Said it won't happen again." "And what do you say?" asks Gus. "I've got eyes on him," Mike replies, before adding the judgment that I am guessing he will be forced to regret and retract by the end of the season: "But yeah, he's good." "Good," Gus nods. ZIEGLER FOR GOD'S SAKE PLEASE DO NOT LET MIKE DOWN.

Then the camera's behind a hole with irregular edges as something drips past on the other side. Presently, Jimmy's squatting down to inspect it and asking, "Is that water?" The bungalow in "Something Stupid" was no great shakes, but now he's in an even less charming space: a long rectangle with grubby tile, fallen drop ceiling panels, and glass walls on two sides, several panes of which seem to have been waiting a while to be replaced. But back to the water damage: the realtor showing the property claims, "The landlord will kick in for small repairs like that," adding, "They already took care of the rodent problem." I'm going to go ahead and say this guy's not counting on closing a deal today? Jimmy, of course, isn't thrilled to hear there ever was a rodent problem, but the realtor shrugs that Jimmy specified "small and near court," both of which requirements this dump satisfies: "And it's in your price range." As he urges Jimmy to "use [his] imagination," Kim appears outside and knocks on the door; Jimmy excuses himself.

AMC

Okay, don't think less of me but I kind of like it from the outside??? Obviously, it could use some cosmetic updates, but the '70s Space Age-iness of it is pleasing to me. Anyway, Kim's leaning against a piece of pressed wood in place of a glass pane and smoking when Jimmy comes out, and asks him, "Is this your new office?" Jimmy, embarrassed, says it's a contender, and asks what she's doing there. "I was driving, saw your Esteem in the parking lot," says Kim. Ah, Jimmy's esteem. Look somewhere dodgy and you're sure to find it! Jimmy removes the cigarette from Kim's mouth to take a drag himself, and asks her what's up. "Nothing," says Kim, surveying the landscape. "Just driving around, thinking about things." Jimmy guesses at what that means, and starts doing a version of what Mrs. Nguyen had recommended: "I know what's on your mind. The thing that we did, I mean, it was nuts. And I dumped it in your lap. Ex parte communication, contempt of court, we're talking about a couple hundred counts of mail fraud -- I could've wrecked you at Schweikart, I could've boned me too. I mean, I'm this close to being reinstated. I mean, come on!" Kim doesn't answer, nodding as she keeps her eyes on the horizon. Jimmy hands her back the cigarette, telling her, "Don't worry. No one's going to know about it. Be like it never happened. And also, I agree, we are totally done with all that. Over and out, no more." Kim blinks, exhales her latest drag, then fixes her eyes on Jimmy's to let him know he guessed wrong, telling him, "Let's do it again."

AMC

Jimmy is shocked, but Kim is steady. That's the last time Jimmy takes Huell's advice about lawyers. Or ladies. Or...lady lawyers.

As Nacho comes in to start his day at El Michoacano, he's surprised to hear loud music playing inside, and shoots a look at Domingo, already seated at his table...

AMC

...and looking like he shat his pants. Nacho takes a long time silently looking from Domingo to the kitchen, where the radio is blasting, before finally heading back there, sliding a hand back to his weapon just in case. The chef is absently singing along to the music, and Nacho stands in the doorway waiting for him to turn around and notice him -- which, soon, he does, greeting him with a huge smile: "You're here! Right on time." (Throughout the conversation, they switch from Spanish to English and back again, without any significance for either choice that I can discern.) The chef finishes preparing a plate for Nacho, promising he's going to love it: "I made this just for you! Never in your life have you tasted something so delicious, it's true. Wait, wait -- you're gonna die." Okay, on the page that looks bad, but other than, you know, where he is, there's no menace to this guy: he just seems really easygoing and friendly. Also, not for nothing, hot. Still, Nacho makes a pissface and declines the proffered plate. The chef leans his face in, takes a big sniff, and, grinning, encourages Nacho, "Smell it! You can't say no, are you crazy?" Nacho doesn't move or speak, so the chef backs off, pleasantly: "Very well. You're not hungry. That's your problem." He sets the plate down, telling Nacho it's a special recipe: "A family secret." Nacho, having come further into the kitchen by now, guesses, "The Salamanca family." The chef excitedly turns around to confirm it: "I am Eduardo, but you can call me Lalo. And you must be Varga, no? They told me you were smart. And look, here you are, and you are." He chuckles as he returns to his pans. Trying to sound unconcerned, Nacho asks what Lalo's doing there. Casually, Lalo replies, "I'm just here to lend a helping hand, you know, make sure the business is running in order. I got a good head for numbers."

AMC

I'd give him a good head for numbers, wait did I type that out loud. "Don't even worry," Lalo assures Nacho. "It's going to be like I'm not even here." With that, Lalo takes his plate out to the floor; as the day's first dealer enters, Lalo calls over his shoulder, "Come on, Varga, let's go!," before settling into the seat right next to Domingo, patting him warmly on the back and, presumably, giving him the delicious dish Nacho declined.

AMC

Maybe Nacho should go to Winnipeg. I guarantee no Salamanca would follow him there, nor would literally anybody else.

Also Available As Part Of The Epic Old-School Recaps Podcast

Source: http://previously.tv/better-call-saul/better-call-saul-rediscovers-the-lost-art-of-letter-writing/

افضل فنادق اسطنبول Journey Sensible With These Rapid Tips For A Tension-Free Holiday

Touring is one thing we all do from time to time. It is frequently crucial for both business and satisfaction. Making traveling less difficult is a purpose that a lot of of us have. In this report we will discuss a number of guidelines for making your next journey encounter an simpler one. When traveling, always be prepared to have فنادق انطاليا stolen. Make advance photocopies of all of your essential papers. You can even upload digital scans of these files for straightforward accessibility whilst touring. The nearby American embassy can support you in contacting those at residence who can wire you unexpected emergency money or aid in replacing your passport, but not significantly else. When you arrive in a new lodge space, enable the hot water operate in the shower for a little فنادق تركيا اسطنبول even though. Even the nicest of hotels can be somewhat filthy. Permitting the very hot h2o operate will aid kill spores that the normal cleaning might have missed. حجز تركيا are not having to pay for the water bill in the room anyway. For safe traveling, never have all your valuables in one particular area. No one desires to deal with missing belongings even though on a excursion, but if you do have to, it is better to decrease decline. Set your credit cards, income, jewelry, and whatever else you worth in a selection of different areas -- some in your bag, some in your pocket, some in your wallet, and such. That way even if one thing gets stolen or misplaced, you probably will not lose every thing. When touring with a puppy, brush your puppy ahead of placing them into the automobile, specifically if the vehicle is a rental. This will drastically cut down on the volume of fur that flies about in the car in the course of the travel. افضل فنادق اسطنبولIt will also lessen the volume of time you have to devote getting rid of the hair from the vehicle. When being at a large-conclude domestic resort, carry along your personal A/V cable for your laptop. Most hotel rooms at nicer hotels offer totally free in-space WiFi and a massive HDTV, but will then charge a high quality for in-place videos. Obtaining your very own A/V cable gives you accessibility to your very own selection of downloaded movies or an on the web account. Have you ever considered of touring overseas? You may want to maintain on to your touring programs for awhile and go to farther and distant lands. Instead of using two outings a yr you can control go on a single excursion for a calendar year. Just make positive you hold an eye out for bargains due to the fact you may well get a genuinely good offer on resort and flight tickets. Get in contact with an individual who operates a nearby فنادق تركيا اسطنبول weblog in your spot city. Most usually, these bloggers are hugely experienced about the ins and outs of their town, and are pleased to share tips or tips, helping you get the most from your trip. Make confident to truly study their website, so you can remark or compliment them on it before inquiring them for aid. There are numerous big families that would like to journey to common holiday destinations, but are afraid they are not able to find the money for it. You can ebook outings with time sharing and preserve income every yr by already having the lodging. If you program outings when gas charges are reduced, you will also preserve money on your journey bills. Bring postcards from home to present off or trade. Putting up a dialogue is much easier if you can whip out a postcard and explain to a person this is where you are from. You can also trade these with road sellers for neighborhood postcards or other goods, specifically if you are from a nicely-recognized or lovely metropolis. Understand the tipping lifestyle for whatsoever international locations you plan to pay a visit to. In some cultures, tipping is computerized, although in others, it does not exist. There are nevertheless a handful of cultures in which tipping is regarded a great insult, so mind your manners by checking the customs. You do not want to insult your server. Before you travel it is a very good notion to be part of some on the web vacation community forums like TripAdvisor, Fodors, Frommers and LonelyPlanet. These message boards are fantastic locations to decide up guidelines and guidance from individuals who have presently visited your selected vacation spot. You can also use these discussion boards to uncover a travelling partner. When packing your baggage, use your extra sneakers to hold tiny things this kind of as socks, jewelry, toiletries, or electronics chargers. The place within the shoes would in any other case be squandered place. This can also help to hold you more arranged if you know, for instance, that all of your prescriptions medications are in your sneakers. When traveling, in order to stay away from getting the concentrate on of a theft, do not use any flashy jewellery or clothes. Also, do not carry extreme amounts of cash on you. Use a debit or credit rating card each time you are heading to make a buy. There are even unique debit cards that are utilized when traveling overseas. Touring is اسعار فنادق تركيا for organization and enjoyment as well. It can at times be challenging to navigate airports, determine routes for automobile travel, or even recognize a bus routine. So how do you make journey simpler, and more satisfying too? In this report we have supplied a couple of tips that can aid. We hope they will demonstrate effective the following time you determine to vacation.

Kufika (Arrival)

There were a multitude of thoughts that went through my head when I was waiting at the airport, about to depart for a year in a very foreign place. My family finally left, after a series of tearful farewells. I cleared security and ate a bagel. I organized and reassembled my belongings and made sure my belt and shoes wouldn’t fall off. Then, I was finally alone with my thoughts, at the brink of a descent into a new adventure that might very well change my life forever.

Chief among my thoughts was surprise. Despite the fact that I signed up for this trip more than a year before this day arrived, and I spent the better part of five months preparing, both mentally and physically, for whatever was to come, I lacked the existential ability to understand that the day of departure, for weeks circled on my calendar, had arrived. A mistake, perhaps? Surely just a mislabeling by the people who print the calendars. Or perhaps this was all an elaborate exercise to train my loved ones to prepare for an emergency departure should a drug cartel or shadow government set its sights on me. Yes, a mistake! “Good show, everyone. Back in the car! Just toss all the luggage in the garage and throw a tarp over it. Let’s never speak of this again. What’s for lunch?”

The true surprise was that I hid the reality of the departure from myself for as long as possible, instead focusing on the preparations for the trip: the vaccines (“These will keep me safe when I go on safari, and swim in beautiful, flowing rivers,” I said, as the nurse rolled her eyes); the purchase of vast quantities of clothing (“I bet doing laundry is going to be an unique and interesting experience”); stocking up on camping and survival equipment (“This thermal sleeping bag, first-aid kit, and oversized knife will keep me safe, warm, and happy”); and the good-bye parties (“Yes, yes, I’ll do my best not to come home with any African wives, but you know it just can’t be helped, what with these good looks of mine”). What stood between the months of preparation and the day of departure was the stark difference between the known, the familiar, the comfortable and the vast and yet-to-be determined future. I was about to embark, truly, on a journey into the unknown.

Intertwined with my surprise that this was all actually happening, that my family has really left the airport and wasn't going to turn around in a fit of rage and demand to extricate me from this calamitous situation into which I’d somehow become enmeshed, was the cold drip of a slowly intensifying panic. We aren’t talking junior varsity–type panic, either. This is Friday-night-deep-in-the-heart-of-Texas-varsity panic. This panic was scouted since it was 16. This panic was going pro. It was reminiscent of those grimly vivid anxiety dreams in which the very thing you’ve dreaded is coming to pass and there is nothing you can do to stop it. I had to give up control to the great wave of the universe and let it push me toward wherever I was going.

Yes, I tricked myself into thinking what a grand adventure a year in Tanzania would be, and everyone for some reason listened to me and let me get on with it. If you ever find yourself in this situation, here is my advice: sit in one of those slouchy, faux-leather airport chairs, arrange all of your bags in a pyramidal structure within your immediate reach, close your eyes, and make a mental list of all the things for which you are thankful. Try not to think about how much you will miss them when you finally yield to the as-yet-unknown-to-medicine innard-consuming parasite that you will undoubtedly contract. Positive thinking in these situations is key, as I will demonstrate again and again.

While you meditate on your future, a number of other, somewhat more practical, thoughts will vie for space in the tumult of your mind: “Why did I pack so much? Surely I won’t have any use for seventeen pairs of underwear and three bath towels. I’m sure I can just pick up a new one if one becomes soiled at the local grocery shop, along with some cough drops and a decent bottle of Scotch.” Following this might be, “Why did I pack so little? I need at least two good frying pans, and seventy-five more toothbrushes. Damn those TSA guys for making me throw out the Wi-Fi router and my French press.”

At various intervals, other thoughts will attempt to intrude: “What does CPR actually stand for? Does my vaccine for yellow fever cover other colors of fever, or just yellow? When they said to be ‘conversant’ in Swahili upon arrival, does that mean stop-and-chat or full-on debate and interrogation techniques? Why the hell will I need hiking boots? What if my roommate is a mouth-breathing racist who doesn’t wash dishes? Who is going to file my taxes?” You have a few connecting flights to take before you get to New York to meet up with the twenty strangers who will form your network of friendship and emotional support for the next twelve months, so focus on one thing at a time. Take as many deep breaths as you can manage without passing out, put one foot in front of the other, and count down the minutes until you board the international flight and the booze is free. This is good advice. Trust me.

***

After a thirty-six hour journey that commenced with drinking coffee in Buffalo; enjoying celebratory beers in the sterile and characterless halls of JFK’s international departures terminal; watching the sun rise over the Swiss Alps; flying into Nairobi, Kenya, over a vast wildlife park and trying to locate zebra and giraffe from the plane; and watching brightly lit ships cross the dark ocean near Zanzibar, I arrived in Tanzania. During the long layover in Zurich, verdant, rolling Swiss hills framed the rising sun from the airport’s windows, and I was tempted, more than a little, to stop off there, find a stylish hotel next to a medieval pub, and put an end to this crazy African adventure before it had begun. (Hopefully it would be the very same hotel in which my stunning and brilliant flight attendant happened to be staying, to provide an opportunity to embarrass myself in multiple languages.) I didn’t, though. Otherwise this book wouldn’t exist and I’d be living happily in Switzerland, writing about chocolate, mountains, and my love for cozy sweaters.

The only hiccup occurred in Zurich immediately upon boarding the Swiss Air flight to Dar es Salaam, when I noticed that the entertainment system on the plane wasn’t working in some rows. The thought of an international flight without the sedative of television was unsettling. A beleaguered flight attendant paced back and forth between complaining customers, murmuring quiet apologies. To compensate, I took to narrating in my head the plot of the show being watched by the woman three rows ahead of me, where the TVs were working, while opening the first of many tiny gin bottles. Finally, someone in the back of the plane hit the power console with a brick and the screens jumped to life. Fourteen hours, four movies, and many tiny gin bottles later, I arrived in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania.

The Dar es Salaam airport, which was more the idea of an airport than the actual thing, was small and confined, with one ticket desk and one baggage claim. After searching for a few minutes, I found a bathroom to which the door didn’t close all the way. Everything, including the walls and ceilings, looked to have been lifted directly from a mid-century American shopping mall. The customs process led to our group of twenty volunteer teachers, with me as a representative, hastily presenting a stack of passports and about $1,000 in brand new US $50 bills to an amused official to pay for our Tanzanian entry visas. I stood warily next to the counter, keeping a respectable distance but quietly watching to ensure our passports were properly returned with stamps and visas. They were, and everything was in order. Suddenly, we were allowed to enter the country. Lesson One: Somehow, Tanzania has a way of evening out the most chaotic exchanges, and things wind up right in the end. But I didn’t know that at the time.

From there, we made our way outside into the late-evening Dar heat. The sky was streaked with the last vestige of the day’s light. What a sight we must have made to the cab drivers, shopkeepers, and native travelers, with our bags and backpacks and hiking boots and walking sticks and safari hats. You can’t help but look out of place when arriving somewhere after a long plane ride, especially one that traverses multiple time zones and countries. A great machine picked you up, whisked you away for a period of hours or days, and spat you out on the flat surface of somewhere else. You practically reek of foreignness. Because the actual experience of air travel is mostly anodyne and repetitive, with most trips seeming identical from the inside of the plane, arrival in a new place becomes even more jarring, like waking up from a strange sleep in a new place. “How did I get here? Where am I and what am I doing? Why is it so hot?”

The air was cooler immediately outside the airport’s entrance, laced with flowers and far-away smoke and the sweet evening scent of fading heat. The exterior courtyard of the airport was ringed with Plexiglas stalls selling snacks, SIM cards, and postcards of Mt. Kilimanjaro. Small kiosks with colorful signage offered money exchange and safari tours. It was a place that, though I could not know at the time, I was destined to spend many more hours before my journey was complete a year later. A group of cab drivers stood near us, probably trying to decide if we needed rides and if it was worth trying to approach us. I was instantly on guard, a product of exhaustion and the defensive instinct that kicks in upon arrival in any big city.

One of the drivers, whose badge was visible on his Manchester United jersey, approached me and greeted me in English. “Looking for a ride?” he asked. I explained that we were waiting for transportation, speaking slowly and probably sounding like an idiot. I had no idea how my speech patterns would be understood, if at all, so speaking clearly seemed a good plan. The driver nodded, in a friendly way, and continued standing next to me.

“Where are you from?” he asked.

“America,” I replied. “We are teachers.” He nodded again.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

“All over,” I said. “We don’t know yet.”

He seemed confused at this and didn’t reply, probably thinking I was a bit crazy in addition to being rude, but he stood next to me for a moment longer. I’m sure he was trying to get a fare, yes, but he was also trying to be friendly and to welcome us to his country. He held out his hand and I shook it, bringing an end to our conversation. He walked back to the group of drivers and commenced an animated discussion with them in Swahili. I was left feeling very out of place. Not for the last time.

After we stood around nervously for about twenty more minutes, sweating in the unfamiliar heat and watching people come and go with the jealousy that belongs only to outsiders, our Field Director arrived to collect us in a bus with Mustafa, our driver, and we piled all of our bags into the back. Think twenty people multiplied by about 100 pounds of luggage per person—a veritable mountain. I was surprised the bus didn’t tip over. Not for the last time.

The journey from the airport in Dar to Mpingo Farm Stay, about 24 miles (38 km) outside the city, was one of the most surreal I have ever taken. The combination of exhaustion, adrenaline, darkness, and the intoxicating smells and glimpses of an unfamiliar world, created a panorama that will never fade from my memory. Surrounded by my companions, who were newly energized by our arrival, I sat crammed into a tiny bus seat with my forehead pressed against the window, trying to fight off my body’s nervous energy and find some sleep. I settled instead for staring out the window at the unfamiliar tableaux that passed by in islands of light. These visions were surrounded by shadows that seemed deeper and more mysterious than I’d ever seen. The bright lights of the airport quickly faded into the enveloping darkness as we drove down a wide highway lit only by dim street lamps. In the darkness, I saw countless people walking along the sides of the street, in pairs and groups, riding bikes, sitting and eating. It looked as busy as a Sunday morning.

Tiny shops, built from concrete blocks in the dirt and mud at the road’s flanks, dotted the night with flashes of light as we passed. I saw barber shops with neat, hand-painted signs; tiny hair salons with long strings of beads covering the door; shops the size of phone booths flanked by bags of grain and cement and oil drums, generators, symmetrical mountains of fruits and vegetables, soccer jerseys, bright bolts of cloth and fabric, and stacks of colorful plastic buckets of all sizes. Other shops were surrounded by wooden headboards and bed frames, unvarnished chairs and table legs, and piles of luggage and suitcases. Small bars and open-air restaurants with glowing television screens and neon beer signs were ringed by plastic chairs set in pools of eerie, hazy light. A solitary man walked down the sidewalk holding a tray of gum and cigarettes for sale, lit by a single candle. A pool table was illuminated by a lantern hung from a tree, around which dozens of people were gathered, some observing, some discussing, some dancing.

Candles lit tiny spheres of night, illuminating fleeting scenes and leaving me with only parts of a large whole. My exhaustion gave way to confusion, and the passing heads and bodies silhouetted in pools of candlelight became scenes from a strange night market in a new, post-apocalyptic world. Hovering somewhere between exhaustion, panic, and relief, I watched as we passed motorbikes, cars, trucks, three-wheeled motorcycle taxis called bajajis, and a multitude of people standing, walking, eating, drinking, fighting, singing, and dancing in the darkness. I felt as if I’d stumbled into a play with no audience. It was both oddly familiar and astonishingly new, as if remembered from a dream.