#bluebloodsxSVU
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Imagine Peter meeting your family and them not knowing you’re dating
(A/N: This is long because I don't know when to stop. Also, I’ve decided that all my Peter imagines taking place in the same timeline with the same Y/N. You don't need to read all of them but they are all connected so they offer background. I just really like the Y/N and the dynamic! I hope you enjoy this. I know I’m doing a lot of peter stuff but I’m currently obsessed. EDITING LATER. I’M TIRED SO I’M SORRY IT SUCKS!)
WARNING: CONTAINS SEXUALLY SUGGESTIVE CONTENT! NOT N*FW BUT BORDERLINE
Imagine Peter meeting your family and them not knowing you’re dating
You’d seen many of the different sides to the illustrious ADA Peter Stone over the time you’d known him. His usual stern, cold and sarcastic demeanour that he adorned during work that rarely ever faltered, his cheekier, carefree and flirter side when he was off the clock or had a couple of drinks I'm him. The in-between that only ever appeared when you had worn him down with he described as your ‘sparkling personality’ a comment almost always followed by an eye-roll. His utter heartbreak and hopelessness. To his pure pleasure and desire whenever it was the just the two of you. You’d seen all of him but you couldn't honestly say that you had ever seen him completely relaxed and content.
Until this morning that is.
You’d woken up and found yourself in his arms. You were on your front, your head resting on his firm chest as well as your right shoulder and arm that was wrapped loosely wrapped his torso. The rest of your body pressed comfortably into his side. Your legs entangled though it seemed like Peter had eased his limbs off yours so you wouldn't have to deal with the pressure. You couldn't move as Peter had a strong hold on your right hip, his arm resting lightly on your back to keep you in place. Right next to his heart. You couldn't move, but you didn't want too.
He was still sleeping and when you looked up at him. He was content and completely relaxed. His sharp features light and at ease but what convinced you the most was the small smile he had as he slept. It was small almost smirk but a smile all the same. He looked peaceful. Happy…You couldn't help but smile back up at him.
You eased your hand up to touch his face gently, barely applying any pressure because you didn't want to disturb him, your heart swelling with joy, after everything he gone through it was nice to see him like this. You weren't convinced that you were the reason, you were just a contributor.
You shifted as best as you could.
“Stop moving,” A gravelly voice murmured above you before pulling you even closer to him, his grip on you strong but you were undoubtedly comfortable.
You lifted your head up to look at his face. His expression remained the same and his eyes were still closed. He dipped his head to the crook between your neck and shoulder, his face in your messy hair and the tip of his nose and breath tickling the sensitive skin of your neck.
“So you are awake?” You questioned playfully, the sensation making you shudder slightly.
“No, I’m still sleeping,” He mumbled into your skin as he pulled even more of you on top of him and he continued to bury his face into your neck, moving your hair out the way and placing a small kiss on the exposed skin.
“Then why are you talking?” You countered, adjusting to your new position.
“Talking in your sleep is actually a very common occurrence and is not usually considered a medical problem,” He began to lecture but his voice still remained husky in tone.
“Peter, it’s 10am,” You announced, lifting your head off his chest to glance at the clock on his bedside table
“It’s Sunday,” He countered, his voice restless and thick with sleep, which he seemed to be falling back into it.
“You’re the one that likes to wake up early!” You reminded, with a breathy chuckle.
“I’m aware but when you’ve been kept up all night…” He argued, whispering now, obviously exhausted by last nights activities.
“It wasn't all night and need I remind you that you’re the one who invited me over,” You defended, enjoying how easy it was to argue with Peter while he was basically asleep.
“For dinner,” He stated, even tired he could be on the top his game.
“You didn't complain last night when dinner turned into this,” You pointed out.
“Go back to sleep Y/N,” He mumbled, giving in.
“You know I have to leave soon, right?” You commented while counteractively wrapping an arm around him in order to get comfortable.
“No,” He moaned without thinking, his voice vibrating, “You have to stay here with me,”
“Why’s that?” You probed eagerly.
“Because you’re soft and comfortable and I am tired.” He began to list lazily as if he wasn't paying attention, “And I like you a lot. I like it when you’re here…a lot,”
“Are you always so romantic in the morning?” You teased, kissing the base of his neck.
There was silence as he hesitated and shifted. Waking up completely now and clearly registering everything he had just said in his semi-conscious state.
“No,” He said sternly, his voice adjusting and suddenly clear and stern like at work, obviously an attempt to hide his embarrassment.
“Nooo,” You whined, pouting as he opened eyes and adjusted so you could look at each other, “Give me sleepy romantic Peter back,”
“He doesn't exist,”
“I beg to differ,” You scoffed, jabbing a finger into his side as you continued, “Normal Peter is never romantic,”
“And yet he has so much success getting you to sleep with him,” Peter commented, lying back comfortably beneath you.
You sat up for the sole purpose of looking him in the eye when you glared at him.
“You’re one cocky bastard, you know that?” You scolded as he smirked.
“Would it make you feel better I pretend to be hurt?” He asked his voice laced with sickening sweetness, just to tease you.
“Now I’m glad I have to leave,” You huffed, getting off him completely sitting up fully beside him.
He rolled his eyes.
“Don't be like that,” He continued to tease, a stray hand running up the length of your upper thigh “What can I do to make it up to you, hmm?”
“Say something romantic,” You demanded, crossing your arms and huffing like a petulant child.
You watched with a sceptical gaze as you watched him compose himself. His expression turned mysterious, his eyes growing dark with desire, bringing himself up to a seated position. Not breaking eye contact with you, his stare so intense instantaneously that you didn't dare break it and despite your best efforts it made your heart quicken and breath stopped as he had the power to capture your whole being in seconds. He leaned in ever so slightly, his face inches from yours as he lightly brushed the hair from your face.
“So,” He began, his voice suddenly even huskier than before, low and alluring, “How much do I owe you for last night?”
“You bitch,” You exclaimed as he burst into booming laughter.
You shoved him back hard and fell back down on the mattress still laughing. His laugh was hearty and true that you couldn't help but join in despite him besting you. You raised your hand to swat him again playfully but he grabbed your hand and used to pull you on top of him. Your knees falling to either side of his torso as you looked directly down onto his face. Your arms still held above your head.
Still laughing he captured your lips in a searing kiss, his version of an apology, the intensity growing that your held fists were pressed against the headboard as all your attention was fully taken over.
“Why are you so mean to me?” You pouted playfully, break free of his hold so you could run your hands down the length of his chest and then even lower as you could feel from your position how excited he was getting.
Clearly, he wasn't that tried from last night or perhaps he just wasn't tired of you yet.
“You’re the only one who can keep up with me,” He responded sincerely, still panting from breathlessness beneath you.
His words made you stop momentarily, sitting up straight on top of him as you considered what he said. Your heart pounded with content and something else that you couldn't quite figure out. A sensation of feeling overwhelmed but in a good way. You felt good. You could feel Peter was about to say something else but you interrupted him swiftly. Pressing your mouth to his hungrily a surge of passion taking you over as you moved against him, smiling as you did. Peter was taken aback, surprised by the sudden eagerness but there were no complaints. Moans escaping his mouth into yours as you ground your body against his, intensity rising to a level that your knees gave out and you just lay on top of him.
You half expected for him to flip you over and take over but he seemed content with letting you take the lead, surprisingly so as Peter liked to be in control in these circumstances. Though he couldn't help his hands fumbling with the hem of your shirt…his shirt…pulling it off you promptly and tossing it across the room, leaving you bare besides your underwear. His hands roamed your back and the rest of your body for that matter as you began your trail of kisses down the front of his chest. He hissed the lower you got. He pulled you back up for another kiss before you could get any lower than his navel. His fingers now toying with your underwear. You nodded approval and he proceeded promptly.
Then there was a bang. And then another and another, in quick succession.
“Ignore it,” You panted, pulling away so his moan was audible, retracing your trail of kisses but making it lower this time.
“Y/N…” Peter breathed shakily.
Another bang, and then another and then another.
“I don’t think…” Peter began before stopping as you made no attempt to stop.
“NYPD!” A voice boomed followed by another succession of loud knocks.
Perhaps you should have recognised the policeman’s knock. Alas, the words caused both you and Peter to stop in tracks. Sitting up and giving each other a confused look. You fell back onto the bed in a huff about the interruption as Peter pulled on his boxers and grabbed his robe to cover himself.
“I’ll make it quick,” He promised, kissing you fiercely clearly as annoyed as you about the interruption, “Now If you’ll excuse me I’m about to go murder a police officer,”
You chuckled appreciatively, “It’s fine. I’ll go make some coffee instead,”
Peter went to go answer the door and you got dressed before making your way to his kitchen. You heard him talking to who you could only assume was the officer but Peter’s body blocked the view as you walked passed the front door from the living room.
You yawned and a large stretch before going to retrieve two mugs from the cabinet.
“It’s no problem at all, Officer Reagan,” You heard Peter say clearly.
You froze. No…it couldn't be. How would he even know that you were here? Maybe they tracked you? You wouldn't put it past any of them.
“Sorry to interrupt your morning Stone,” You heard what was most clearly Jamie respond.
Of course, they would send Jamie to catch you. Erin and Danny were weak and would never confront you directly.
“Sorry, for making you wait,” Peter added.
“You didn't curse, shout or swear so you really don't have anything to apologise for,” Jamie joked, “Take Care, thanks for the help,”
“See you around Reagan,” Peter concluded before shutting the door.
A silence filled the apartment as Peter made his way to the apartment to meet you, where you were still frozen in place.
“Was that?” You questioned, despite what you had heard you needed some sort of confirmation.
“Your brother Jamie,” He nodded, his look as puzzled as yours.
“How? Why?” You spluttered, almost in shock.
“There was a break-in downstairs and he was canvassing,” He explained.
“So a complete coincidence,”
He nodded.
“How is it that they can cockblock me without even trying?” You sighed before raving, “It’s just like in high school, one of my brothers always managed to interrupt me, though in a lot of those circumstances it was intentional…”
“Was this a common occurrence?” Peter inquired, his curiosity peaked, leaning towards you using the counter as leverage.
“What?”
“Sneaking boys back to your house while you were in high school?” He elaborated, smirking.
“Peter, you know who you are dating,” You stated simply looking up at him.
“I do indeed,” He chuckled an arm slinking around your waist, pulling you close before kissing you, you had to keep your arms outstretched as you were still holding two coffee cups, “Shall we get back to…”
“The moments over sweetie,” You winked, grabbing his face and giving it tight squeeze, “Plus I still do have to leave soon,”
“Right, it’s Sunday,” He nodded, plucking the coffee cups from your hands and gesturing for you to sit at the island.
“Which means its Reagan family time,” You added with a subtle eye-roll.
“Plus it’s your turn to help with the cooking,” He mentioned, as he began to make you both a cup of coffee.
You tossed him a confused looking, resting your chin on your hands and leaning forward, analysing him as he moved around the kitchen.
“What?” He demanded, “I listen when you speak,”
“And yet all my suggestions at work are always ignored,” You countered.
“Because they’re always illegal or inappropriate,” He reminded, before taking a sip of his back coffee, shooting a wink in your direction as he did, as he continued to make your preferred extra froffy latte.
A few minutes later he slid over your coffee before taking a heavy seat beside you at the island counter. Sipping in a comfortable silence. You lost yourself in thought and he seemed to notice.
“You okay?” He asked, peering at you over his mug.
You nodded with a sigh, “I just can’t believe out of all the cops that could have been put on canvas it happened to be my older brother who ends up knocking on your door on a morning when I’m here,”
“Maybe it’s a sign,” He offered with a shrug.
“You don't believe in that stuff,” You pointed out.
“But you do,” He insisted, “Personally I think it’s just a coincidence,”
“Hell of a coincidence,” You muttered.
“Stranger things have happened,” He offered, “Plus it’s not like he saw you. I imagine it would have been much worse if he did. No brother likes seeing their sister half naked emerging out of her new boyfriend's bedroom with sex hair,”
You patted your hair gingerly, before raising an eyebrow and smirking all while leaning into his space, “Boyfriend, huh?”
“It’s been two months, Y/N.” He stated, referring to the amount of time since you had engaged what could only be described as an exclusive relationship after your encounter in his office.
“I’m aware,” You responded, though admittedly you were hesitant, you knew that it was highly likely that he was only seeing you exclusively.
“I didn't think I needed to explicitly ask you to be my girlfriend.” He argued, “I thought it was obvious after what I said before,”
“Yeah,” You confirmed, quickly.
“So you don't mind if I refer to myself as your boyfriend?” He inquired with his usual natural confidence but there was a slight uncertainty laced in the tone of his words, nervousness, hesitation.
“Not at all,” You smiled brightly.
“Good,” He stated, concealing his own smile that was spreading across his features by taking a sip of his coffee.
“Though I personally wouldn't mind if we kept it between us for a little while longer,” You confessed, nervously, looking down at the bottom of your coffee cup, gripping it tightly.
“Oh?” He probed.
“I mean just…I really like where we are right now and just how it is, you know just us knowing…” You fumbled, “My family are really important to me and I want them to introduce you to them eventually just not right now because you’d be the first person…”
“You aren't the only person in this relationship that hasn't been in a serious longterm relationship in a while,” He interrupted, saving you, “I’m okay with taking things slow, keeping things between us and waiting until you're ready to met your family officially as your boyfriend. I’ve said it once and I’ll stay it again. I’m not going anywhere because I like you a lot,”
“Like like me like me?” You joked.
“I like you like you, like really” He empathised, playing along but rolling his eyes so you knew that he disapproved.
“I really like you too,” You beamed in response, “And I’m excited to introduce you to them even though you met them already but as my boyfriend…within the next couple of months,”
“Is that a timeframe I hear?” He mocked lightheadedly.
“You know what that is,” You reenacted, much to your own amusement “Growth,”
A deafening silence ensued.
“Was that a joke? Was I supposed to laugh?” He questioned.
“And to think I was going to come back here after lunch to continue what was so rudely interrupted,” You sighed, dramatically.
“Oh you’re coming back,” He chuckled.
“You sound certain,” You commented, recoiling away from him.
“Need I remind you?” He teased, his eyes sparkling mischievously at you, “You really like me, like like me like me,”
After another round of coffee and a couple of long lazy Sunday morning makeup sessions, Peter finally let you go back to your own apartment to get ready for dinner. And despite his reluctance to let you go, even though you were coming straight back as soon as you were done whenever that would be, you still arrived early which meant you were most definitely on dinner duty. A few hours later you found yourself standing with your Grandfather Henry, peeling and chopping vegetables, while Linda cooking almost everything else. Your Dad was in his office, your brothers hadn't arrived yet neither had Jack, Sean or Nicky, who were all coming together. And Erin was running around the house packing Pop’s suitcase.
“Erin, will you calm down,” You sighed, impatiently as Erin strode into the kitchen for the umpteenth time.
“I’m looking for Pop’s glasses,” She exclaimed, shuffling through the sideboard in search of them.
“Have you tried his face?” You suggested, pointed exaggeratedly at his face with your peeler.
“Hey careful, you'll take my eye out,” He warned, concentrating hard on chopping his potatoes.
You stuck your tongue out at him which he responds to by jabbing you in the ribs, causing you to giggle.
“Okay, maybe, I’m going a little crazy,” She admitted, sitting heavily at the counter, “But I wouldn't be if this one could pack his own suitcase properly,”
“I did a fine job,” Pop huffed.
“You packed cargo pants and fishing rod for Barcelona,” She reminded.
“They fish in Spain!” He insisted, “And besides it was my top choice of vacation destination,”
“You didn't have a choice remember,” Erin chuckled, “This my vacation, you and Nicky are just tagging along because one of you is my daughter and the other is my Grandfather who claimed he wanted to see the world in his retirement,”
“I didn't realise Montana was on the moon,” He snapped.
Erin rolled her eyes at him.
“Notice how neither of us was extended an invitation though,” Linda pointed out teasingly, nudging you as she circled the kitchen.
“I noticed, it’s nice to know how she treats her sisters,” You joined in, dramatically, flashing a disgusted look in Erin’s direction.
“You’re both working,” She reminded, taking it seriously, “And besides the point of taking this trip is…”
“Because you’ve been so dedicated to your job for so long and you’ve been so busy that you haven't taken a day off or vacation. And now that you’re the DA you finally able to take some time to rejuvenate and spend time with your daughter. Because you’re amazing. A martyr really who does nothing but tirelessly help others,” You interrupted before continuing for her, “Yes, Erin we know, you’ve told us fifteen times if not more.”
“I don’t recall referring to myself as a martyr,” She commented holding her arms and leaning back with an annoyed expression on her face.
“It was implied,” You stated, waving the peeler in her direction without thinking.
“Y/N,” Pop said sternly, “Don’t make me take that off you,”
“Please do,” You sighed, before turning back to Erin, “What I was trying to say before I was so rudely interrupted is that you’re going on this vacation to relax right,”
She nodded.
“Then stop stressing and chill,” You ordered, “Just sit and enjoy your last day in New York before you all leave tomorrow. Who cares if Pop hasn't packed everything he needs. There are shops in Spain,”
“You’re right,” Erin admitted in defeat.
“I still can’t believe you’re even going. Erin Reagan taking time off work to vacation no less.” Linda commented, taking your vegetables.
“I know I’m so proud,” You teased.
“I’m only going because I finally feel like I'm leaving the office in capable hands and it won’t fall to pieces without me,” She muttered, distracted as she began scrolling through her finger, with one finger no less.
“And whose hands are those?” You inquired, casually.
“Hands I’m sure you know very well,” She chuckled quietly, her eyes glued to the phone screen before flickering over to yours, “Peter Stone,”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” You demanded, defensively instinctually before immediately regretting it.
“That he’s your departments ADA,” She started slowly, taken aback by your reaction, “And that you work together. What did you think I meant?”
“I thought you were making a bad joke or something,” You played off, letting out a relieved breath.
“Anyway, he’s the only ADA we have that has at least some experience running the whole office. And he’s really been settling well especially the last couple months and considering what happened it’s really nice to see. I was worried but now I definitely feel able to let him be in charge while I’m gone and when I asked he graciously accepted and thanked me.” She explained.
“You like him then?” You probed gently.
“Y/N, I hired him!” Erin countered, “Of course I like him. He’s a hell of an ADA and man might I add,”
“Really?” You questioned, surprised.
She nodded, still engrossed with her phone, “He has a high success rate, nice to work with on my end, handles your department well and from what I hear has really bonded with your department as well,”
“Oh yeah?” You entertained, “Who said that?”
“Peter,” She stated, clearly in her eyes it was obvious, “I do check in with my employees, you know? Your department is notoriously difficult so I took upon myself to make sure he was handling it. You know like most bosses,”
“No need for the attitude Erin. I’m making conversation,” You huffed, “I just don't want to hear you speak about your vacation anymore,”
“Swimming trunks!” Erin said in response, before jumping out of her seat before heading back up the stairs.
“She’s crazy if she thinks I’m going swimming,” Pop whispered in your ear making you laugh.
Thirty minutes later, everyone else had arrived and Linda had completely taken over dinner which was scheduled to start in around twenty minutes time. You were lounging on the sofa with Jamie, watching the game. You had made idle conversation about his morning and he mentioned ending up canvasing ADA Stone’s apartment. It was casual but the interaction made your heart race but forgot about it as soon as he finished, mentioning nothing about seeing you or anyone else in his apartment for that matter.
Much to your relief, might you add. It wasn't like you were afraid of your family finding out about you and Peter or even introducing them to him as your boyfriend, it was just that you wanted to take things slow. It was after all your first real relationship in a long time and you had forgotten truthfully what it was like. It had already been two months but you were enjoying it just being the two of you, right now. And you wanted to hold onto that for as long as could before introducing him to everyone. Your family was the most important thing to you and everyone else in your family so you knew that it was going to happen sooner rather than later.
“Aunt Erin, it’s for you!” Jack called into the house after answering the door.
You heard Erin rush to the door behind you but you didn't pay much attention concentrating on the game as you had bet Danny and you were about to cash in big time. You were so engrossed in the game that despite the proximity you couldn't hear who Erin was talking to.
“Come on. Come on,” You whispered before jumping up dramatically and hollering, grabbing Jamie and shaking him.
“Nooo,” Danny responded, rushing into the room.
“Suck it, Danny,” You shouted happily, spinning around excitedly to face him only to met with a sight that made you stop short.
“Sorry about them,” Erin apologised, giving the three of you disappointed looks before looking at Peter whose gaze was fixed subtly onto yours.
You widened your eyes at him only to shake it off, not wanting acting strange or make it obvious to the five other police officers and lawyer in your family that something was going on between the two of you.
“Hey Pet…Stone,” You greeted, trying to control the shakiness in your voice which you managed to do by the end of it, “What the hell are you doing here?”
“Ada Stone,” Danny greeted, tipping his beer at him before returning to game nonchalantly.
“Danny. Jamie. Y/N,” He acknowledged in turn, “I just stopped by to get Erin’s signature on a couple of things before she left so she won't have to deal with it all when she comes back,”
“So you came all the way from Manhattan?” You questioned, still transfixed in place.
“I know, right,” Erin agreed, “It really could have waited,”
“They’re due on Wednesday and it would have been a massive headache for you when you came back,” He insisted.
“Well, thank you for taking the time and making the trip,” Erin breathed, “Here let’s go into my Dad’s office, it will save my siblings from any further embarrassment.”
The comment earned a snicker from your brothers while all you could offer was an awkward smile.
Peter gave you one last lingering look before following her out. You let out a breath and sat back down heavily. You needed to pull yourself together or you were going to be obvious that something was going on between the two of you. You could no longer focus on the game or engage in the conversation between your brothers. It had caught you off guard that’s for sure. Peter hadn't even mentioned that he would be working while you were gone or that he was in charge of the DA’s office for a week.
Your head continued to spin as you tried to get your head straight.
“Earth to Y/N!” You heard Danny say before jostling you, to get your attention.
“What?” You demanded, smacking his hands away playfully, scowling at him as you focused back on your surroundings.
“Dinner’s ready,” He stated, looking at you annoyed, “Didn’t think you’d want to miss it,”
“Thanks,” You snapped with a smirk, pulling yourself up.
As the three of you began to pile into the dining room, Erin popped her head around the door.
“By the way, Peter’s staying for dinner,”
“What, why?” You asked a bit too quickly.
“Because he came all this way to make my life easier. Least I could do was offer him lunch,” Erin shrugged, “Is that a problem?”
“No!” You insisted.
“Good,” She responded, though her eyes were suspicious, “And besides we have extra thanks to someones over chopping,”
“Well, if someone hadn't been distracting me,” You began before turning into the dining room to see Peter chatting to your Dad and Grandfather.
You both tensed up at the sight at each other momentarily. Everyone began taking their seats as the boys finished setting the table.
“Peter take my seat by Y/N,” Erin offered, pulling out another chair for myself.
“Thank you,” He said graciously before sliding into the seat on your right while your Dad sat on your left at the head of the table as always.
Everyone was still settling so you looked at him pointedly before grinning willing and saying slightly louder, “So Stone you excited about your first Reagan Sunday lunch? Promise we don't bite…well except Danny,”
“You want to start, Y/N!?” Danny retorted quickly taking his seat opposite you.
“I am,” He chuckled, relaxing slightly beside you, “Thanks for inviting me, Boss,”
“Don’t mention it,” Erin waved off.
“Besides it’s been a couple of years since we had a Stone round for lunch,” Your Dad added.
“What do you mean?” You inquired.
“Ben Stone was a regular at Sunday lunch back in the day,” Pop chimed in.
“Back when he was my EDA,” Your Dad smiled, reminiscing.
“Right,” You nodded.
“Thank you by the way for coming to the funeral. I knew it would have meant a lot to him,” Peter thanked, graciously yet again, your eyes meeting for a second as they swept passed you to look at your Dad.
“It was the least I could do,” Your Dad sighed.
“I didn't realise you guys had met before,” You commented.
“I’ve actually met most of you guys before except Danny, Linda, Nicky and the boys, of course” Peter divulged.
“You could have mentioned it,” You suggested, with exaggerated shrugged shoulders.
“Well, you keep me so busy that I don't have time,” He teased.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“That I’m always fixing your messes to discuss anything else besides work,” He clarified, sweeping his eyes across the table to see everyone enjoying your display.
“My messes, get you your convictions,” You stated, both of you slipping into your work relationship easily and the teasing quickly followed suit.
“Is it always like this between the two of you?” Jamie asked, interrupting you both.
“Nothing like the relationship between a Detective and his ADA,” Pop grinned, gleefully, causing you to blush slightly.
“Tell me about it,” Danny commented shooting a false smile in Erin’s direction which she rolled her eyes at.
“Are they all like that?” Jamie asked, gesturing to the two of you.
“You would know if you took the Detectives exam,” Danny intervened which led the conversation away from you and Peter.
An argument erupted between Danny and Erin and you took the voice and distraction as an opportunity to speak to Peter.
“Why didn't you text me?” You whispered.
“I didn't even think about that. I didn't think she would invite me in and especially not to dinner,” He responded in a hushed tone that only you could hear after leaning slightly into his side, “I’m sorry,”
“No, it’s okay. I’m just surprised,” You reassured.
“I know you don't want to say anything yet,” He relayed.
“Yeah, it’s just too soon you know,” You confirmed.
“Okay, whatever you want,” He agreed, “I can pretend, we do it at work well enough,”
“Why didn't you tell me that you’d met my Dad and Grandpa before?” You asked.
“I didn't think it would be a big deal. It was only briefly anyway at the funeral and I thought our first real meeting would be when you introduced me to them,” He offered, “I’m sorry it didn't turn out that way,”
“No, it’s good that you get a run-through before the real thing right,” You figured, “It will be less pressure next time or let you know if you want to end it all to avoid ever coming back again. I wouldn't blame you…”
“Hey, I’m not going anywhere…” He insisted.
“What are you to whispering about?” Danny asked, drawing the groups attention back to you.
“I was just trying to save your first impression after that embarrassing display,” You snapped, “We have guests Danny, try and control yourself,”
“I’m so sorry Peter,” Danny apologised with mock sincerity earning a laugh from the table.
“Don’t worry about it. I’ve seen worse from another Reagan at this table,” He commented, looking at you.
“You talking about me?” You mumbled, your mouth filled with potatoes.
“Well, I’m definitely not talking about my boss also known as the woman who signs my paycheques,” He laughed.
“Oh, I see how it is,” You commented, folding your arms, instinctively, “Are we talking about the guy on the roof?”
“Yes!”
“What guy on the roof?” Jamie asked which caused Peter to launch into a long story about the time you had an unusual method of obtaining a confession from a suspect.
“I can’t believe you did that!” Linda burst out as the story concluded.
“I know right!” Peter agreed, engaging the whole table with his storytelling, like a true lawyer while you sulked and rolled your eyes.
“You’d think he knows by now not to try and stop me,” You interjected, “And he dangled me off the roof first!”
“Excuse me for trying to stop you from dying by trying that trick again,” He countered.
“You act like it’s a common occurrence,” You retorted.
“Oh, it is!” He insisted, “Let me tell them the story about Y/N and the carjacker,”
“Go ahead,” You encouraged, “They’ll agree with me!”
“Maybe not,” Erin chuckled.
“I will kill you,” You said with dead seriously.
For the rest of the dinner, Peter retold some of your greatest moments, cases and arguments you had had together over the time you had worked together. He always started telling the story but you always butted in along with everyone else in the family. As it wore on the more relaxed everyone was. It felt natural and Peter was a good fit with your family, very much neutral and offering a unique side to Danny and Erin’s sagas. They all seemed to like him and it put you at ease. So much so that you didn't even notice that you were subconsciously leaning closer and closer to him. You rested your elbow and on the back of his chair and often grabbed for his hand to draw his attention or to stop his hand gestures. His hand would also land on your knee occasionally as he spoke, he did it without even thinking. You were hyper-aware that everyone's eyes were on you but you were satisfied that everyone just saw you both as close co-workers, probably friends, even though you clearly argued like an old married couple.
There were no funny looks, suggestions or look so you figured when the dinner ended that you were both in the clear and that they didn't suspect anything more. Everyone scattered again and Peter was invited to stay back for a while. You, on the other hand, headed back to the kitchen alone as it was your turn to do the dishes.
You washed contentedly, unable to wipe the smile from your face when you heard the kitchen door shut and felt strong arms wrap around you.
“Peter!” You gasped, spinning around to face him in concern that someone might walk in after you.
He took the opportunity to grab your face and pull you in into a frenzied, urgent but long kiss before he pulled away and rested his forehead against yours.
“God, I’ve wanted to do that for the past three hours,” He breathed.
“Tell me about it,” You chuckled though your eyes continued to flick between him in the door before kissing his cheek quickly.
“Then kiss me again,” He suggested, pulling you closer.
“One of them could walk in any minute,” You reminded, half-heartedly trying to push yourself out of his grasp.
“They’re busy,” He promised, pressing a hot kiss to the sensitive skin on your neck.
“Peter,” You warned, failing to be stern as you were enjoying it, “It’s a glass window,”
“Okay, we’ll get out of view,” He winked, before casually pushing a pile of napkins onto the floor behind the island counter, “Oops,”
You giggled as you both, dropped to the floor, completely out of view. You smiled at the mischievous look in his eye before kissing him again. Feeling like a teenager again with the threat of being caught hanging over you as you delved your hands through his hair. Though you eventually had to pull away or you knew neither of you would have stopped.
You brushed off your clothes before helping with Peter’s hair. He helped you finish up before you both headed back into the main room where everyone else was. They didn't have time to register you because as soon as you walked in, Danny pulled Peter away, to confirm a story Erin had been telling them while you and Peter had been occupied.
You hung back, unable to hold back your smile as you watched Peter continue to effortless blend and bond with your family. So much so you didn't even notice you Dad sidle up next to you.
“So, you and Peter…” Your Dad began, making you jump before you glanced to your side to see him standing next to you, watching over the rest alongside you, though he was nursing a drink.
“What about me and Peter?” You questioned defensively, yet again, making you cringe internally as you knew if anyone was going to pick up on something between the two of you it would be your Dad.
“Seem to get along really well,” He continued, eyes watching you carefully.
“I guess,” You shrugged, perhaps too nonchalantly.
“He seems nice,” he added.
“Yeah, he is. Some of the time at least,” You confirmed and then added.
“Smart too,”
You nodded.
“And he has a good job,”
“Yep,”
“Gets along with everyone,”
“Looks like it,”
“Treats you well. Clearly respects you and wants to keep you safe,”
“What are you getting at Dad?” You asked, directly.
“Nothing,” He responded, “Just that I’m glad you work with someone like him and he’s obviously lucky to get to work with you every day,”
“Damn straight,”
“You should invite him over for dinner again sometime,” He suggested.
“I will,” You agreed.
“As your boyfriend?” He questioned in the same tone, though you were taken aback.
Maybe you hadn't hidden it as well as you thought.
“Look Dad…” You began though words seemed to fail you as you couldn't think of what to say.
“You don't have to say anything. Not yet at least, I’m pretty sure no one else has guessed. But to me it was obvious. But I just wanted you to know when you’re ready we will be here. If you want to talk about it before then I’m here. And I know that it probably would have been your mother you would have gone to about this stuff but I just wanted to let you know that I am here. If you want,” He reassured.
“I know, Dad,” You smiled, leaning into his side after he wrapped a protective arm around you as you watched Peter happily laugh with your siblings.
“I like him for you,” You Dad finally added.
“You do?” You questioned, looking up at him.
“You sound surprised,” He chuckled.
“He’s a good man. Clearly in love with you. Why wouldn't I approve? Not that you need my approval,” He countered.
“I appreciate it though, Dad. It means a lot!” You grinned before your face fell, as you glanced back at Peter who caught your eyes momentarily and smiled covertly as he could see your Dad was watching too, “I don’t think he’s in love with me though.”
“We disagree on that point then,” He considered.
“We do,” You brushed off.
“You don’t sound so sure, Y/N/N,” He teased, good-naturedly.
“When am I wrong?” You played off, your heart rate accelerating as you let yourself consider the possibility momentarily.
“When am I?”
#peter stone#peter stone imagine#ada peter stone#ada peter stone imagine#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#svu#svu imagine#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#svu fandom#SVU fanfiction#blue bloods fandom#blue bloods fanfiction#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#Reagan#Jamie Reagan#Erin Reagan#Danny Reagan#Frank Reagan#henry reagan#svubloods#imagine#imagines
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Stone or Dodds
Sorry to bombard you guys. But I have an idea for an imagine that in all honesty is a bit more SEXUAL and or suggestive than I usually do (not NSFW though) and I think you'll enjoy it. Hint its about one night stands and death. Problem is that it could work for both Peter or Mike. The idea was originally for Mike but now I'm leaning towards Peter. IDK so I'm asking which one would you guys rather see.
Also thanks for the support on the latest imagine. It means so much and part two should be out soon
Have a good day!! 😊 ❤️
#law and order svu#law and order: special victims unit#blue bloods??#bluebloodsxsvu#mike dodds#peter stone???#Thoughts#thoughts
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Imagine Jamie proposing to you
(A/N: Sorry for my flakiness. I hope you enjoy!)
Continuation of these Imagines HERE and HERE
Imagine Jamie proposing to you
“Hello?” You asked tentatively down the line, your face screwed up in discontent.
You had tried to let the call go but you couldn’t answer it. It was Jamie after all. In the brief seconds, you waited for his response, you're cursed at yourself for giving in. You knew he wouldn’t be happy.
“Y/N!” He sighed, relief in his hushed whisper as you were officially a good hour late, “Where are you?”
You looked around with pout before awkwardly offering, “The car…?”
“Is it driving to our place?” He probed.
“No…” You dragged out honestly thought it was reluctant.
“Why not?” He let out, you could sense the frustration down the line.
You could practically imagine him squeezing the bridge of his nose.
“Would you believe me if I said I was stuck in traffic,” You offered reasonably, looking at the empty road ahead of you.
“No,” He countered simply, detecting your deception.
“Why not? It’s a perfectly reasonable excuse considering the city we live in,” You reminded, logically.
“Where are you, Y/N?” He sighed and asked once again.
You couldn’t stall him any longer. You knew that he was stalling everyone there, waiting for you to arrive.
“I’m outside,” You finally confessed.
“What?” He said in surprise.
“I’m outside. I have been for fifteen minutes,” You elaborated, angling yourself so you looked up at your apartment block and more importantly your apartment window.
“What are you doing outside?” He whispered, obviously not wanting everyone to hear.
“Sitting and breathing mostly,” You admitted, “I’m just sitting in my car, feeling guilty”
“I’ll be down in a minute,” He said immediately, ending the call so you didn’t have time to argue.
As promised in about a minute. You saw Jamie jog out the building and then peer at all the nearby car, looking for yours before finally locking eyes with you. He sped over and slid into the seat next to you as soon as you unlocked the door.
“Hi,” You let out after a silence.
“Y/N…” He started again.
“I don’t want to go in,” You interrupted.
“Why?” He probed.
“You know, why.” You reminded.
“I know you think…” He began.
“I don’t think. I know.” You interrupted yet again, leaning your forehead on your steering wheel.
Jamie put his hand on your back and rubbed it comfortingly.
“They’ve already started haven’t they?” You asked, turning so you could face him and rest your head.
“They may have said a few things…” He admitted, “But that’s only because they want the best for you,”
“Why do you give them that much credit?” You asked.
“Someone has too,” He smirked, “But also because unlike you I listen to what they say. And I don’t know how many times I’ve told you this,”
“So it’s all in my head?” You asked.
“No,” He smiled, “You're just a little biased.”
“They have been better,” You gave in, “Because of you mostly.”
“You can’t give me all the credit,” He insisted, “You’ve really been trying lately. I’m really proud of you,”
“At least someone is,” You scoffed.
Jamie’s hand found it’s way to your cheek and he stroked it gently. You sat in silence for a few moments. Your eyes locked. And in that moment everything seemed less scary. Jamie always had that effect on you. You could conquer anything with him by your side. Even a party with your family and his.
You had also just passed your three year anniversary of being together. Earlier this week you had just moved into your new apartment. It wasn’t your first apartment together by any means but Jamie had insisted he wanted to gather both your families together for a housewarming party but not with any of your friends which you found strange. They were a good buffer between you and your parents.
Things between you and your parents had slowly but steadily improved since you and Jamie started dating. They had fallen in love with Jamie and he had been brokering some sort of understanding between you and your family. He was good at it probably because he was so close to his own. And though he didn’t always understand he had always tried to make things better, encourage you to step outside your comfort zone.
He was a natural with people, he could talk to anyone while you were the complete opposite. You found it hard to connect to people, probably because of how you grew up. But Jamie just understood you and you connected really easily with his family. It was a surprise but it felt right. Though that was hard to accept in beginning. The feeling of being accepted by a large group of people without any real effort. Like a family, you suppose.
You unbuckled your seatbelt and wrapped your arms around Jamie. Burying your face in his chest. Everyone was still waiting for you. The both of you technically but especially you as you had yet to make an appearance.
“Do we have to go in?” You pouted, positioning yourself so your face was only inches away from his own.
“It’s our housewarming party!” He reminded.
“Why are we doing this again?” You sighed.
“Because we bought a new apartment,” He reminded yet again.
“We didn’t do this for the first apartment we bought so why…?” You went to ask.
“Because it’s important to me,” He interrupted to state, stroking your cheek.
“Fine,” You accepted, unable to argue with that, kissing him again briefly before muttering against his lips, “I just don’t understand why it is,”
“You will soon,” He smirked, before opening the door, getting out and waiting for you to follow.
Still confused you got out the car and headed upstairs. The party was in full swing which would be given considering it was a good hour after the party was supposed to start. You sucked in a breath and Jamie squeezed your hand before everyone swarmed you. Everyone seemed so happy to see you. Like they had been waiting for you, which they probably were considering it was your housewarming party. The air was a buzz. A hidden excitement in everyone's undertones which you couldn’t quite place. Even your parents, surprisingly. They gave you a hug and even told you how much they liked your new place. Though they had some suggestions, of course, you remembered what Jamie had said.
Plus regardless of what they said. You knew this was going to be the place you would call home for a very long time. It was perfect and you could picture your life with Jamie here. There was a big kitchen and dining room area so you could house both your equally large families. There was an office big enough so that both you and Jamie could share for those long paperwork nights together. And there was a small spare bedroom, for whatever happens. But you knew whatever does, you and Jamie will be going through it together. He was your everything, mind, body, and soul. He was your future and you couldn’t wait for it to start.
As soon as you slipped away from your parents grasp. You ran into your brother Sonny.
“And where have you been?” He inquired immediately, neglecting pleasantries, and engulfing you in a hug.
“Freaking out in my car,” You admitted, taking a place beside him, facing the party.
“They haven’t been too bad,” He reassured.
“Yet,” Yous sighed, tossing your parents a nervous glance.
“Have some faith. Tonight’s going to be a good night,” He grinned.
“And how do you know that?” You countered.
“I know a lot of things you don’t,” He replied.
“My GPA would beg to differ,” You quipped.
“You’ll see,” He smiled before heading over to talk to Jamie’s brother Danny.
You continued to mingle for a while until you finally sidelined by Jamie’s Dad, Commissioner Reagan. Though you called him Frank, well he insisted you call him that. You usually called him Commissioner but you were working on it.
“You look like you need a break,” He commented, handing you a water and pulling you to the window so you could overlook the city.
“Thanks,” You smiled, taking a deep breath, averting your gaze and taking a sip.
There was a comfortable silence for you both. Out of all the members of Jamie’s family, his Dad was easily your secret favorite. He was quite easy to talk to despite his initial intimidating exterior. You boned over a mutual love of botany and your relationship had only developed from there. You very much saw him as a Father figure and you hope that he saw you as a daughter. He treated you just like he did Erin and Linda. Jamie insisted that you were his favorite child but you could never believe that.
“I think you think too much.” He suddenly said, already knowing what you were thinking about.
You snorted and looked at your feet, “Tell me about it,”
“You need to stop worrying about what they think,” He insisted,
“Because regardless of what they think, it shouldn’t take away from how you feel,”
“But they keep on saying things about this apartment, you know?” You sighed, still not meeting his gaze, “And I…”
“And you what…?” He probed.
“Just wish for once they would support me without having to critique it first,” You finished.
“Tell me are the things they are saying things you have noticed before they said it?” He asked.
“No,” You answered, thinking back to you mothers comment about your drapes.
“Then why worry it about it now?” He smiled.
“Because they mentioned it.” You persisted.
“People will always have something to say. Sometimes positive, sometimes negative but regardless of what they say about you or something else. Take what they say for what it is. An opinion. Not a fact. What they say shouldn’t take away from how you feel,” He explained, “Always do what you feel is right regardless of what anyone else thinks or says,”
“Sometimes it’s hard to ignore though,” You countered, “Even with this place. I couldn’t stop thinking about what everyone else would think of it before getting it, especially my parents.”
“Do you like it?” He asked.
“Me? I love it of course.” You stated.
“Why?” He inquired.
“Because whenever I’m here I feel like I’m at home. I can just picture my future with Jamie here perfectly unlike at our old place. It just wasn’t us but here. This place is us.” You answered.
And in that moment, you figured it all out. You finally understood why everyone was acting so strange. Frank noticed for shift and even though he acknowledged it he didn’t say a word directly about it. Ignoring it practically.
“Then that’s all that matters,” He reassured.
“You’re right,” You chuckled
“I get that a lot,” He returned.
“What if something goes wrong? What if they are right? You know about the drapes and stuff?” You asked all of a sudden.
“Don’t be afraid to be afraid, Y/N. Sometimes you can’t stop the things that happen nor can you predict everything that you will. You just have to have some faith. Close your eyes, take a deep breath and take the risk.” He advised, “ And keep the drapes.”
“Thank you,” You said as you hugged him tightly.
He didn't respond, he just gave you a squeeze. An unusual glint in his eye.
“Are you okay?” You inquired, tilting your head at him, studying his expression.
“Very much so and I have a feeling that my mood will only improve,” He replied.
“And why is that?” You asked inquisitively.
Frank didn’t respond. He just gestured to behind you. You span around quickly your hair and the hem of your dress flying. Jamie was tapping his glass as everyone's eyes fell on him. You couldn’t help but smile at his grinning face. He really was excited about tonight though you did notice that his hand was shaking slightly as if he was waiting for something in eager anticipation.
“Hi everyone. I just wanted to thank everyone for coming to celebrate with Y/N and me in our new apartment. We’re so excited to share our new home with all the people who are the most important to us.” He began, earning a cheer so he had to pause.
“This is a really special place for Y/N and I. For many reasons. The first being it’s the first apartment we’ve had together that we both actually like. The second being it’s the first apartment that didn’t sustain any lifelong damage because of Y/N’s cooking. But the most important reason is a reason Y/N doesn’t even know about yet, which is surprising because if you know anything about Y/N. You know that she knows everything and that’s she's usually right. Empathises on the usual.” He continued, looking his grinning eyes with your confused eyes.
The crowd seemed to separate with a laugh at his comment, so Jamie had a clear walkway towards you. He took a step towards you.
“But Y/N is so many things besides smart. She’s kind and caring and she has the ability to make anyone feel comfortable. She’s therapy for the soul. I can still remember from the second I met her how easy it was to talk to her. I’ve never felt nor stopped feeling so alive, loveso connected, so present then I have since the moment I met her. No matter where we are whenever I’m with her. She makes me feel like I’m at home and that lovedand appreciated. She makes me believe in myself and she’s never let me think that I couldn’t do anything I put my mind to. She believed in me and made me believe in myself. She’s the greatest person I know, the greatest person most people know. And I know she doesn’t always believe it but I’ll spend the rest of my life reminding her.” He continued, walking towards you before stopping in front of you.
“So I figured what better place to ask the girl who makes me feel at home whenever I’m with her the most important question I’ll ever ask anybody in my whole life than the place that I hope we’ll call home for a very long time…” He smiled, before dropping on one knee and pulling a small box from his pocket.
You gasped in shock and awe, your hand flying to your mouth as he presented the box to you and opened it. Revealing his mother ring.
“Y/N, will you marry me?” He asked, looking up excitedly and expectantly at you.
You closed your eyes, took a deep breath and smiled.
“Yes,” You said simply, opening your eyes to cheers and applause.
Jamie jumped up after sliding the ring on your finger. His lips found yours as his arms wrapped around you and dipped you. You waited for Jamie to open his eyes so you could smile at him.
“I love you so much,” You whispered, tears in your eyes.
“I love you too,” He grinned, wiping away your spilling tears with his thumb.
“To think I almost ruined tonight by being too scared to come in,” You commented.
“You couldn’t ever ruin anything, Y/N. You only ever make things better.”
#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#Jamie Reagan#jamie reagan imagine#officer jamie reagan#officer jamie reagan imagine#sonny carisi#Sonny Carisi is coming up#carisi#imagine#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#imagines#svubloods
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Imagine your sister Erin finding out that you’re dating Sonny
(A/N: Dedicated to all those who supported and waited patiently. You know who you are and I hope you enjoy)
Continuation of this imagine HERE
Imagine your sister Erin finding out that you’re dating Sonny
“Morning,” Sonny greeted with a grin as you sleepily emerged from the bedroom.
Sonny had been humming and dancing in your kitchen while you assumed making the two of your breakfast before he noticed you.
“Eh,” You managed to reply as you stretched and yawned, before stopping and tilting your head at him.
“What?” Sonny questioned, noticing your confused expression.
“Are you naked under that apron?” You quizzed, looking at him intently still tilting your head to the side to get a better a view.
“Yeah,” He admitted reluctantly with a shy chuckle as he blushed, “I couldn’t find my boxers,”
“Sonny, you have a whole drawer filled with clothes here and since the primary piece of clothing you wear here is underwear I’m assuming you got a couple in your drawer,” You pointed out, holding your arms across your chest.
“Well, the truth is…” He gave in and admitted, “This was supposed to be a breakfast in bed thing and I knew you would prefer if I wasn’t wearing anything,”
“Wow, you really do know me well,” You nodded, “But I’m going to need you to take that off,”
“Seriously? Now?” He questioned surprised.
“No, not of that,” You defied, “But probably later. You have to take it off because it just doesn’t seem sanitary to me. I wear that when I cook and more importantly so do my nephews when they come over.”
“You don’t cook,” He reminded.
“Sonny,” You persisted.
“You have to find my boxers first,” He insisted.
“Okay, where are they?” You asked, turning around and looking around at the living room.
“Well, where did you throw them last night?” He countered.
All you did was smirk as you searched. You found them quite quickly and headed back into the kitchen.
“Here,” You said, tossing them at him.
“Where were they?” He inquired.
“Couch cushions,” You shrugged.
“Alright, turn around,” He said.
“What why?” You quizzed, puzzled.
“Privacy,” He stated.
“Do I need to remind you what we did last night?” You asked, “And every other night for the past eight months,”
“Just do it,” He insisted.
“Fine,” You gave in.
“Fantastic,” He commented.
“What is?” You questioned.
“The view,” He teased.
You looked down at yourself and remembered that you yourself were only wearing a short pajama top and underwear that in your opinion made your rear look fantastic. You spun back around and frowned in response to his wink as he continued to make breakfast after quickly washing his hands once again. Guess, he knew by now that you would call him out for it if he didn’t
“You’re so annoying,” You commented, walking towards him.
“Guilty,” He smirked.
“Mmm,” You agreed as you wrapped your arms around his waist as he continued to fry his eggs.
“What are you doing?” Sonny questioned as you maneuvered yourself around his body so you were wrapped around his front, causing him to take a step back from the stove top.
You just shrugged with a pout before resting your head on his chest as you continued to cling onto him.
“Whose being annoying now?” He posed out loud.
You shrugged once again, “I like being close to you,”
“I do too but my eggs are going to burn,” He reminded, stomping his foot lightly in feeble protest but you knew he liked it secretly as his arm was already loosely wrapped around you as he tried to reach for the stove top.
“Let them,” You said before leaning up and kissing him.
Sonny couldn’t resist going along with it. His hands stopped reaching and wrapped around you instead. Leaning in as passionately as you were.
“Seriously Y/N,” He said against your lips but making no attempts to stop what was happening, “They are going to burn,”
“Think of it as burning calories,” You quipped also not stopping as your hands slid down his back.
“No, I can’t deal with the apartment burning down,” He said breathlessly pulling away for few seconds to turn off the gas, “What about breakfast?”
“How about we go out for brunch instead?” You suggested, resting your chin on his chest.
“Works for me,” He agreed, before kissing you again but without the added worry of burning down the apartment he was much more into it.
He lifted you up effortlessly on the countertop without falling out of passion or sync. His hands fell to your thighs as you wrapped your legs around his waist. Sonny began to trail kisses down your face to your neck only to be interrupted by knocking on the door.
“They’ll go away,” You insisted, your hands in Sonny’s hair before you began kissing his neck.
Sonny nodded and went to go again before being interrupted once again by the knocking.
“You should answer it,” He commented.
“Why me?” You pouted.
“It’s your apartment,” He reminded.
“It is isn’t it?” You sighed, “Why is someone knocking on my door?”
“Because they are here to see you?” Sonny offered, confused.
“But when someone is here to see me, my door man calls beforehand to let me know who it is,” You said.
“He doesn’t do that with me,” Sonny mentioned, “I knock,”
“Because he knows who you are,” You said, “So that means…”
“It’s someone you know?” He continued on your behalf.
“More like someone I’m related to. All my friends know not visit me this early,” You commented.
“It’s 10:30,” He said.
You just rolled your eyes as you jumped off the counter and headed toward the door. Sonny waited out the counter and watched. You peered through the peephole. It was your sister Erin standing, waiting impatiently for you to open the door. You watched for a mere second but you got the feeling that she knew you were there, watching.
“Go hide,” You hissed, turning around to face Sonny.
“Who is it?” He asked.
“Erin,” You continued to whisper.
“Seriously?” He questioned.
“No, I’m lying because I’d rather be doing this instead of making out with you,” You said sarcastically.
“Here,” He said, tossing you a light dressing gown so you could cover up as much as possible.
“Thanks,” You said sincerely, feeling bad.
“All right, I’m going,” He gave in, “Let me know when she’s gone,”
You sighed sympathetically as you watched him disappear into your room. He had made it clear to you his feelings about your insistence on keeping your relationship a secret from your family especially for such a long time.
Eight months…
It was especially a long time for you. None of your relationships had ever lasted this long. You had six months once relationship, only once, and after that, you vowed never to let it get to that stage ever again but then you met Sonny and then that all changed.
He made you believe again. That you could fall in love. That you deserved to fall in love and to be happy.
It wasn’t an intentional thing. You falling for Sonny or Sonny falling for you for that matter. It definitely wasn’t. Sonny was hardly your classic type. Meaning that every boyfriend you had had before Sonny wasn't as straight edge. Sonny was sweet and open while all your other boyfriends were the tall dark and brooding types. When you first met sure you liked him but not in that way. You liked that he was a good cop and had your back as any good partner should. You didn’t think much of it but then you got to know him. He wasn’t like the partners you had before, you trusted him more than you should trust a colleague. He knew everything about you and it felt natural to you to tell him. You weren’t apprehensive as you typically were, it was simple and effortless. You tried to fight the romantic feelings that you were beginning to feel around about a year ago now but as Sonny has taught you: you can’t fight destiny. It was his humor that got you. While your own was more sarcastic and formulaic his was almost always accidental and honestly stupid. You hated how funny you how it as you loved to claim that your own humor was smarter. He never failed to make you smile and when you were with him, you were always laughing. It’s why you loved him so much.
Sonny asked you out finally after around a year of being partners and three months of tiptoeing around your feelings for each other he finally asked you out albeit after being prompted. It leads to a date which leads in turn to an eventful night. And you’d been together ever since which was eight months. It wasn’t the traditional sort of relationship as you were already in a relationship so there wasn’t an awkward get to know stage you just went into all the fun stuff immediately. It was perfect. At this point, Sonny was basically living at your apartment but neither of you asked if you wanted to move in, maybe it was too soon. Or maybe because you had to hit another milestone before then and that milestone was hard for you.
You loved everything about Sonny and sure that he felt the same way, well that’s what he says, but you know that there was one thing that he wished was different. He wished that you would introduce him as your boyfriend to your family. It wasn’t like your relationship was a secret, everyone else you knew about it. It hadn’t gotten back to your family because you ran in different circles to them. It was an open secret that no one discussed at work. You had met his family prior as his partner and now as his girlfriend. He had met most of your family as well but in the partner capacity. He wanted you to introduce him as your boyfriend but understand why you were apprehensive about it all. Plus you may have told a small lie about your family having a rule that you couldn’t bring anyone to family dinner unless you’d been dating ten months. It was something you regretted and had come up with in the moment the night after you went to meet his family.
Your last boyfriend had been the first boyfriend you’d ever introduced to you family formally and it had ended pretty badly and you were devastated. You hated having to explain to all your family why and what happened. It was embarrassing and you vowed on never doing it again but that was before you met Sonny. Now you were questioning that decision but staying firm on your decision because you were scared, you just didn't want to admit it.
“Do you know what time it is?” You demanded as you opened the door to reveal an impatient and smirking Erin in your doorway.
“It’s 10:30,” She said, walking into your apartment uninvited.
“Come on in,” You said sarcastically.
She just turned and smirked at you once again.
“Why are you here Erin?” You questioned.
“Can’t I visit my sister?” She countered.
“Not on a Sunday morning,” You commented, “Why are you here?”
“I need to borrow your blender,” She stated, “Nicky and I wanted to make smoothies,”
“No please,” You teased, heading to your cupboard.
“Everything that is yours is also mine,” She smirked, “I thought I was going to have to use my spare key in all honesty,”
“Why would you think that?” You countered.
“Well, it was Saturday night last night. I assumed you’d be out still or sleeping off a hangover so you wouldn’t have wanted to get up and answer the door,” She replied.
“It may surprise you to learn that I don’t have crazy nights every weekend,” You mentioned.
“So what did you do last night if you weren't having a crazy night out?” She asked.
“I just stayed in,” You responded, not lying as you had done that just with Sonny.
“By yourself?” She questioned.
“Who would I spend it with?” You deflected, trying hard not to lie.
“A friend possible…” She suggested playfully, “Or maybe even your secret boyfriend,”
“I don’t have a secret boyfriend,” You said tactfully.
“Well, then do you have a boyfriend?” She clarified.
“Why do you think I have one?” You countered, narrowing your eyes at him.
“Many reasons,” She teased, “The main one right now being that hickey on your neck,”
Your hand quickly flew up to your neck in an attempt to cover it.
“Other side,” She smiled.
“What’s your issue, Erin?” You inquired.
“What’s yours?” She countered, “Why can’t you tell me who you are dating?”
“I’m not telling you,” You offered thoughtlessly.
“Why can’t you tell me?” She asked, “Is he a criminal?”
“No, of course not. Definitely not! He’s pretty much the opposite in fact,” You spluttered, “Why do you think I’m dating someone?”
“Sisterly instinct,” She offered before admitting, “I know you Y/N and I know when you're dating someone…when you’re in love,”
“How?” You probed.
“I’ve seen you in love before,” She chuckled, “But this one is different isn’t it? This one is special I can see it in your eyes,”
“Not that I’m admitting anything,” You cautioned, “But who do you think it is?”
“If you aren’t sharing then neither am I,” She smiled, getting up, “The blender,”
“Here,” You said, walking over and passing it to her.
In that moment a crash came from your bedroom.
“What was that?” Erin smirked.
“I’m being burgled,” You said instinctually and stupidly for that matter.
She raised her eyebrows.
“It's my cat,” You joked, “My…ghost,”
“Tell him I said Hi,” She said smugly before walking out the apartment, “See you later,”
You waited until the door sounded behind her before collapsing into a nearby seat. Your bedroom door crept open.
“Sorry,” Sonny said.
“You couldn’t handle five minutes of being quiet?” You teased.
“Clearly not,” He chuckled before asking, “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” You reassured, “I just didn’t think that she was on to us,”
“On to us?” Sonny questioned, “You make it sound like we are doing something bad,”
“No, I meant that I didn’t think she knew I was dating someone,” You corrected.
“Well, it’s not like it’s a secret, right?” He asked, studying you intently.
“Sort of,” You confessed reluctantly.
“What?” He asked.
“So maybe I didn’t tell them I was dating someone,” You admitted.
“I thought you did,” Sonny sighed, “I thought you just didn’t say who you were dating.”
“I didn’t tell them that either,” You said.
“Is there anything else you’ve lied about?” He questioned, his voice harsher.
“My family also don’t have a ten-month rule,” You breathed.
“You’re kidding right?” He said.
You shook your head, not looking at him.
“Sonny…” You want to say.
“So you lied to me?” He inquired.
You bit your lip in anguish.
“When were you planning on telling them about me? Us?” He demanded.
“At ten months,” You offered unconvincingly.
“Unbelievable,” Sonny commented, throwing his hands up in the air and walking away from you.
“Sonny,” You repeated, getting up.
“Why can’t you tell them Y/N? Honestly, why can’t you tell them about us?” He interrupted.
“I’m scared…” You began.
“Guess what Y/N relationships are scary. They’re essentially one massive risk but you know what usually when you’re in it with the right person they don’t seem less scary. Well, at least it’s what it’s like for me but now I don’t know if we are on the same page,” He said solemnly.
“That’s not it…” You began to argue.
“Y/N, I’m in love with you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. But I don’t know if you want the same. I was willing to wait for Y/N but even I’m not going to wait forever for you to be ready. You either think that this relationship is going somewhere or you don’t think it is and it's becoming clear to me how you really feel. I want you in my life Y/N but you keep on giving me the impression that you don’t want me in yours well at least not all part of it.” He continued.
“Can I explain?” You pleaded.
“Not yet,” He sighed, “I need sometimes…so I’m going to go for a bit,”
“Sonny,” You called as he headed into your bedroom your assuming to get dressed.
“I’ll call you later,” He smiled sadly re-emerging after a minute, pulling his pants up.
He couldn’t help but kiss your cheek as he left but he didn’t let you hold it. It was quick and almost impersonal, sort of like a transaction. You watched speechless as he walked out and shut the door.
You felt so guilty.
You knew you shouldn’t have lied to him. You knew it but you just couldn’t help it. The truth was embarrassing and childish. You didn’t want to admit that. You just hated the feeling the way you did because you knew he wouldn’t do what you were scared of.
For the first time in months, you cried and it wasn’t even Sonny’s fault. It was your own. You eventually got yourself together and headed down to your Dad’s house for Sunday lunch. Alone as per usual and usually felt relieved going up by yourself but today you just felt lonely. Maybe because you didn’t get to say goodbye.
You put your bravest face on when you got there not letting even a hint of your current emotional state to be seen. It wasn’t too hard this time anyway, everyone was preoccupied with some drama between Danny and Jamie. So much so that they didn’t even notice you and your acting but one person did of course but that was only because she had kept a steady eye on you throughout the whole afternoon.
She finally confronted you while you were washing dishes alone in the kitchen.
“What’s wrong Y/N?” Erin asked tentatively, coming up from behind you suddenly.
“Nothing, why would anything be wrong?” You said quickly and reassuringly, wiping your face.
“Because you’re upset,” she noted.
“I am,” You insisted.
“Just like you aren’t in a relationship?” She countered.
“Can you just drop it, Erin?” You demanded, you words coming out harsher than you had intended due to your state.
“You guys had an argument didn’t you?” She questioned, studying you closely.
“Erin,” You said again.
“Come on Y/N. Can you just admit it so we can talk about what’s wrong?” She sighed sympathy but impatient all the same.
It was exhausting keeping things from your older sister. She would never stop asking until you told her what she wanted to know. She was a lawyer after all.
You tensed before releasing again.
“Alright, fine,” You gave in, “I’m dating someone,”
“I knew it!” She exclaimed.
“How?” You questioned.
“I know you,” She repeated smiling before her smile fell as she remembered the current situation, “So what happened?”
“Nothing until you came,” You commented bitterly.
“Are you really blaming me?” She asked.
“No,” You sighed, “It’s mine,”
“Come with me,” She insisted, turning the faucet off for you and grabbing your hand so she could pull you along.
She took to the same place you both always went when you were having the heart to hearts. Which wasn’t often but it always did help. It was the swinging bench on your Dad’s front porch. You had fond memories of sipping cocoa with your Mom and Erin in the evenings as you just talked mostly about the fact you were outnumbered by males.
“You can’t lie to me here,” She reminded as you both sat down.
“You’re right,” You confirmed, bitterly.
“So…spill,” She insisted.
“You sound like a teenager,” You commented.
“I live with one what’s your excuse?” She teased.
“I was one not so long ago,” You reminded, “Which we all know is something you can’t say,”
“I’m going to ignore that because you’re upset,” She sighed followed by an encouraged hand gesture.
With a dramatic sigh, you told her everything that had happened and why it had happened.
“I don’t understand,” Erin said as you finished.
“What is there not to understand?” You inquired.
“Why?” She revealed, “Why did you do it? Why did you lie? I know our family are intense but it’s not like we wouldn’t have supported you,”
“I know it’s more me than you guys,” You agreed, “I’m just scared.”
“Of what?” She asked.
“Of screwing up,” You finally confessed, “We all know that I’m the screw-up around here. I mess up everything. Take a look at my past relationships as examples. I mess up good things and I’m so scared of messing this up.”
“You really like this guy don’t you?” She observed.
“More anything,” You admitted, “Everything was going so well and I’m just worried that I’m going to introduce him to you guys and then I’m going to do something stupid and then I’m going to be heartbroken again and then I’m also going to have to deal will all of you guys pity,”
“It’s not pity,” Erin corrected, “It’s sympathy, empathy. We love you Y/N. We just want you to be happy!”
“I just hate that feeling,” You commented.
“And you aren’t a screw-up either,” She added.
“Please,” You played off.
“How do you think you’ll mess things up?” She inquired gently.
“I’ll figure out a way,” You chuckled dryly, “I always do,”
“Do you love him?”
“I do,”
“Does he love you?” She inquired.
“I think so,” You played off, not wanting to dwell.
“Y/N…” She probed.
“Yes, he does,” You corrected.
“Then tell him the truth Y/N,” She said.
“What am I supposed to say? I’m sorry for lying to you and I’m sorry for not telling my family about you because I’m so scared of screwing it up so I can’t introduce you to my family because that’s a change and I'm scared dog things changing. Because when things change they can also end. And I really don’t want things to end. Not ever, not until it has too! I just want to spend the rest of my life you and I don’t want how I feel about you to ever change or how our relationship is now to change. Is that what you want me to say?” You demanded.
“Yeah, that’s good,” A voice from in front said.
You turned to look as you had been turned to the side so you could face Erin.
“Sonny?” You questioned, “What are you doing here?”
“Erin called me,” He revealed walking up the path to get closer to you both.
“How did you know?” You said getting up to meet him but glancing back at Sonny.
“You two are hardly discreet,” She chuckled, “Plus I’ve seen the way you look at him. It’s the same way Mom used to look at Dad. It’s how Linda looks at Danny. It’s true love,”
“I’m sorry,” You apologized as you reached Sonny and he held you at arm's length.
“I know you are,” He smiled, “I just wish you could have told me the truth,”
“I was scared,” You offered ironically.
“And to think I used to think you were fearless,” He teased.
“I am, just not when it comes to relationships.” You reminded.
“I’m not going anywhere Y/N. I know how I feel about you will never go away. What we have isn’t something that just fades. It can’t be damaged by changing. Relationships change because circumstances change all the time. But relationships the core of them don’t. I know meeting your parents is a change in our dynamic but it’s just going to add to your relationship. I want what you have with my family with yours. Give me that chance. I love you so much that nothing you could do can change that,” He said sincerely.
“What if I murdered someone?” You posed to him.
“Y/N,” Sonny said unamused.
“What if I cheated on you?” You persisted.
“Y/N,” He repeated.
“What if I told you that I didn’t like Italian food,” You whispered teasingly in his ear, leaning up before saying, “I love you too Sonny,”
You kissed and embraced swiftly.
“Aww,” Erin swooned as you broke apart.
“Can you not embarrass me for once?” You sighed, still in Sonny's arms and looking up at her.
“No,” She grinned, shaking her head, “Though what’s more embarrassing is that you haven’t introduced me to this boyfriend of yours,”
“You know who it is,” You reminded, “You’ve met before.”
“I’d like a formal introduction to your boyfriend, not your partner,” She insisted.
“Sonny,” You began, “This is my much older sister Erin. Erin this is my boyfriend, partner and best friend Dominick Carisi,”
“A bit cheesy but I’ll take it,” She chuckled, walking down the steps to shake hands with Sonny ceremoniously, “It’s nice to meet you, Dominick,”
“Please call me Sonny,” He grinned, “It’s lovely to meet you. And may I say that you are much more beautiful than your younger sister gives you credit,”
“You can say it but you don’t have too,” You commented under your breath.
“Why thank you,” Erin smiled after tossing you a disapproving look, “Please come in Sonny and meet the rest of the family,”
“Y/N?” Sonny asked, looking at you.
“Yeah,” You confirmed, smiling up at him, “Come and meet the rest of the Reagans,”
“Great,” Sonny grinned.
“Smile, while you still can, pretty boy” You winked as you headed hand in hand into the house.
#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#svu#svu imagine#SVU fanfiction#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#sonny carisi#sonny carisi imagine#Dominick Carisi#dominick carisi jr imagine#Dominick Carisi JR#dominick carisi imagine#SVU FANDOM#blue bloods fandom#imagine#svubloods
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Imagine Nick’s daughter, Zara, letting it slip that he likes you
(A/N: To Anon, sorry for the wait. I hope you enjoy. Only 4k so a bit on the short side than usual but hopefully, you all still enjoy it. Had to take a half an hour break from writing though after hearing SENSE8 is getting a special! Needed to celebrate!)
Imagine Nick’s daughter, Zara, letting it slip that he likes you
“Well,…um…you aren’t who I was expecting,” Nick commented as he opened the door which consequently revealed you standing on his doorstep.
“Who were you expecting at this time?” You smirked, leaning casually against his doorframe.
“The pizza guy,” He nodded, seriously.
“But you’re more glad to see me, right?” You grinned, playfully.
“Did you bring a pizza?” He asked seriously.
You hit him with the files you were carrying in response.
“I’ll take that as a no,” He quipped as he dodged the final sing you took at him.
“Are you going to let me in?” You sighed, shaking your head.
“Depends,” He dragged out, leaning against the doorway you just pushed off from and folding his arms, “Tell me what brings you to my apartment at this time on a Thursday night?”
“It’s seven ‘o’ clock, Nick,” You reminded.
“Exactly,” He agreed, “I usually don’t see you past five so do your car to share what brings you to my apartment,”
“The Mercado case,” You revealed, folding up the file.
“And here’s me thinking that you came all this way to see me,” He sighed, teasingly as he stepped out the way so you could step in.
“You wish,” You quipped, stepping inside and looking around the room before turning back to him, “Plus I didn’t have to drive that far,”
“Really?” He questioned.
“Really,” You nodded, “I was at my Dads,”
“How is the Commissioner?” He asked.
“Very well,” You replied, “Not too happy I had to skip out poker night to track you down and work on a case though,”
“Why can’t we do it tomorrow, why the sudden rush?” Nick inquired.
“Our victim has been identified as a Meredith Harlow,” You began to explain handing him the file.
“So?” Nick shrugged taking the file from you and starting to flip through it.
“Meredith Harlow is a senior executive at Randstad Limited,” You continued, waiting for his reaction.
His eyes widened as he looked up at, tearing his eyes away from the pages in front of him.
“Brass put pressure on Liv who in turn is putting pressure on us,” You finished.
“This is going to take all night,” He commented.
“Which is why I'm here,” You stated.
“Y/N, I can't go…” He began to excuse.
He was interrupted by Zara who came running from the kitchen looking for her Dad. Her priorities changed when she saw you though. Her eyes widened, excitedly, just like her dad and she started to beam.
“Y/N!” She exclaimed, before charging at you.
“Zar Zar!” You returned, dropping to your knees so she ran into your hug instead of your legs.
She came at you with such force that you almost toppled over but you steadied yourself by returning the massive bear hug she was giving you.
“I've missed getting hugs from you,” You commented while you swinging her from side to side to make her giggle.
“Why are you here?” She inquired, looking up at you with big eyes.
“To see your Dad,” You explained but you then lowered your voice into a whisper, “But really to see you,”
“Hehe,” She giggled, scrunching up her face in laughter.
“You should ask him if I can stay,” You suggested in a half whisper, fully aware that Nick could hear.
“Daddy, can Y/N stay and have dinner with us?” Zara asked, turning so she could look up at her Dad, who was watching over you, she also made a point to keep hugging you and press the side of her face into yours.
“Yeah Dad,” You winked.
“Alright fine, but she gets your half of the pizza,” He gave in, shaking his head at you.
“Yay!” Zara squealed, hugging you again.
"And we can make our special dessert” You reminded, grinning at her.
“But Dad finished all the oreos,” She pouted, disappointed.
“Well, it’s a good thing I bought some then,” You comforted, squeezing her cheek.
“You did!” She stated.
“A huh, and…” You announced, getting up and opening the front door, grabbing the bag you’d left to the side and pulling it out, “I bought ice cream. Cookie dough flavour!”
“You’re the best,” Zara exclaimed, grabbing the bag and racing to the kitchen with it.
“After dinner. Put it in the freezer,” Nick called after her before turning suspiciously back to you.
“You knew I had Zara tonight didn’t you?” He questioned.
“Of course I did.” You gave in immediately, unfazed, “That’s why I didn’t call you down the station and came here instead,”
“How did you know?” He inquired.
“You’re my partner Nick. I know everything about you including your schedule,” You smirked.
“That’s a bit creepy,” He commented before softening, “Thank you,”
“No problem, I was hardly going to interrupt your night with Zara by dragging you away,” You reassured.
“Technically, you’re still interrupting,” He reminded.
“If anything I’m adding to the experience,” You rebutted.
“If you would let me finish I was going to say,” He sighed dramatically, before stating, “That you’ll definitely make it better. You may not have noticed but she loves you,”
“I’m sure she would have had fun if it was just the two of you as well,” You comforted.
“I know,” He agreed confidently, “I don’t need to bribe her with dessert. Speaking of bribes where is mine?”
“You mean this?” You said, leaning back out the door and retrieving from the side a case of six beers.
“You know me too well,” He commented, taking it from you and inspecting by lifting it up to his face.
“It’s the real thing, don’t worry,” You smirked.
“Just making sure it wasn’t a knock off or you know poisoned,” He teased, before saying, “Come on,”
“If I was going to poison you I would have done it already,” You reminded, closing the front door again and walking ahead hopefully on route to the kitchen.
“I don’t doubt it,” Nick chuckled, walking with you, putting his hand on your back to guide you the right room.
As soon as you felt the pressure of his hand on your skin, it sent shivers down your spine. You hated that he could do this to you. All he needed was to look at you a certain way, or bite his lip or even touch you briefly and you practically melted. You hated how your feelings made you so vulnerable around him, but you hid it well so you were the only one that had to live with the embarrassment you felt.
You were going to need to face these feelings eventually. Currently, you were just avoiding them and only confronted them when they came up.
You couldn’t really pin point the moment when you started feeling more than just friendly feeling towards your partner of now over two and half years. A good proportion of the first year he was still married to Maria, even though it was rocky to say the least. And regardless at that time you were in a relationship yourself. You think it was around six months ago, after his divorce had been finalised and after things in your won relationship had started to become strained.
You don’t know why you started to like him or why for that matter, fell so hard for him.
Maybe, because, besides from your family he was the only person who’d come into your life who completely had your back and knew you truly. Even though you often tease Nick for not knowing anything about you, he knew more about you than anyone. And it wasn’t because you were partners or you because you saw each other everyday. It was truly because he opened to his heart to you and tried to get to know you fundamentally. Your soul, spirit and mind. He proved himself to be more than the macho aggressive cop that you stereotyped him to be when you first met. He was more than that, you know, he was caring and attentive. And he truly loves life and being a good Dad, most likely because of the experiences he had with his own father growing up.
Maybe you did know why you liked him.
You’d been struggling with this realisation for like you said around six months. Three of which you were in a relationship with another guy. In your defence you had fallen out of love with him, Jason, for months prior but you stuck around because he was nice enough, you were denying your feeling for your partner and you didn’t think that you would find anyone else.
You’d been with Jason for around a year when Nick joined the Special Victims Unit and became your partner. And obviously he was completely engrained in yourself plus back then, you were in love with Jason. He attended your family dinners on Sundays and went to all other family events, he was your boyfriend, so why wouldn’t he. Once again you don’t know when it all started to go down hill for you. You knew by Jason’s reaction when you broke up with him that he wasn’t the feeling the same way. He was still supposedly in love with you while you felt nothing at all. You assumed that he would have sensed something was wrong when you dodged his suggestion of moving in together for several months.
You broke up with Jason around three months ago. You didn’t announce it so to speak. He of course stopped coming to your family dinners and events. You made up excuses for a while but you gave up. You think they figured out that you weren’t together and strangely they seemed to be happy about it even though you were sure that they liked him. Though it may seem like you were but you weren’t hiding it. You were just not talking about it. If they asked you would tell them the truth. And it just so happened that Nick had asked you, he had’t even mentioned Jason for a while, much to your relief.
“Are you okay?” Nick asked, clearly sensing that you had tensed.
“Yeah, I just got shocked,” You said.
“By what?” He questioned, confused.
“The carpet,” You lied, “You know the static,”
“You’ve been dragging your feet?” He asked.
“What can I say? I’m not particularly excited to spend my night with you,” You teased.
“Because you have somewhere better to be?” He smirked.
“Ah, not really,” You confessed, truthfully.
“Really?” He questioned, surprised, “Not even at home with your boyfriend?”
“Well, actually…” You went to say.
“Y/N, come on!” Zara interrupted, suddenly appearing by your side, grabbing hold of you hand and pulling you into the kitchen.
“I’ll go call the pizza guy,” Nick announced, chuckling at his daughters eagerness.
“Why?” You inquired.
“Because both the pizzas I ordered have anchovies on them,” He informed.
“Eww,” You commented.
“Exactly the reason why I’m calling, Hawaiian right?” He asked, pulling out his phone and putting it to his ear.
You nodded eagerly.
“Can’t have some fish on pizza but can have pineapple on it,” He sighed, tapping his put impatiently.
“Because fish is disgusting,” You commented.
“Pineapple and pizza don’t even belong in the same airspace. It’s an insult,” He argued.
“Then why does it taste so good,” You countered.
“Because your tastebuds are as messed up as you are,” He joked.
“You know we’re only talking about pizza right?” You chuckled.
“It’s very important to me,” He stated.
“I feel the same way about pasta,” You agreed.
“So you understand,” He said.
“I do but I still won’t have any anchovies on my pizza,” You reminded.
“I wouldn’t expect anything else,” He chuckled before the phone was obviously picked up, “No that wasn’t to you,”
You couldn’t help but smile before Zara tugged you once again and pull you to the kitchen.
“So what were you doing with your Dad before I came?” You asked, helping her up to sit on the counter seat.
“We were working on my art project, he said we could get it done before dinner,” She explained, gesturing to the countered litter with art supplies.
“What are you making?” You asked.
“A rocket ship,” She said, picking up a stray piece of paper.
“Have you started?” You inquired, curious at her exasperated expression.
“I tried but I can make the long circle bit and Dad couldn't either," She sighed.
"Really?" You questioned.
She nodded.
"It's so easy though," You said, taking a piece of paper and quickly making the desired tube, finishing it with stapling it together.
"Can you do it with this one?" She inquired after you presented her with the finished product, she in turn presented you with another piece of paper of another color.
“Sure," You agreed quickly, doing it for her, "So what are your ideas with this.
She then proceeded to explain the design she wanted on her homemade rocket and how she wanted it to look. She set you off on cutting up shapes for the outer design while she began colouring but then you had to explain that it would p[probably be easier for her to decorate the outside of her rocket before stapling it together.
Around half an hour, you were still waiting for pizza but you had finished Zara's rocket. Nick had come in and reminded you that you were supposed to be working but you insisted on doing it after you had dinner which luckily for you and Zara was taking a while to get here.
"And we're done," You announced while helping Zara adjust the tip of the rocket.
"No no," She insisted, "We have to stick these on the windows,”
"What are they?" You inquired as she handed you three small circles.
“They're us," She exclaimed, "It's me, you and Daddy,"
“Oh,” You smiled, flustered, “That’s really nice,”
You didn’t get tome to say anything else as the doorbell rang and Nick jumped up to go answer it and Zara quickly followed, stating that she was going to get to give the pizza guy money this time. You looked back down at the little specs of paper Zara had given you. You took it upon yourself to stick them on. It made you smile that she had drawn you because she wanted you to go on her fictional space adventure.
Nick caught you smiling to yourself when he came back into the room and smirked at you. After that you ate dinner and while you did, you and Nick started work on the floor while Zara sat comfortably on the sofa watching TV. A couple of hours passed and you and Nick were still working. Zara had moved on from the TV to your hair. As she was in an elevated position it was much easier for her to do your hair. She was putting it into pigtails, so you had to sit up quite straight as you discussed your case, in code of course.
Nick kept mouthing apologises as Zara tugged on your hair had but you just shook you head and chuckled. You just thought it was amusing. You and Nick surprisingly finished a nights worth of work in a few hours, just in time for Zara to go to bed. Zara asked you stay around for a while as she got ready and you agreed even though Nick said you could go if you wanted. Around fifteen minutes later she was all ready for bed and announced that she wanted to do your makeup. Nick once again insisted that you didn’t have to but you couldn’t say no plus you were curious about her skills.
You found yourself, lying flat on your back on the sofa, Zara perched on your chest and brushing at your face. Nick just observed and laughed before walking away to clean up all the messes that you had made over the course of the past few hours.
“Zara,” You sing songed, as she applied sudden extra pressure on your chest because she had leaned forward, “It’s pretty late. Don’t you think it time for you to go to bed?”
“I just have to finish your lipstick,” She said, squinting hard as she concentrated hard on it.
“Does it look nice?” You entertained.
She nodded eagerly.
“Well, it most be if you’re doing it,” You complimented.
“You’re just pretty anyway,” She said complacently.
“Not as pretty as you but thank you very much,” You grinned, amused.
“Daddy thinks you’re pretty,” She continued as she applied once again an obscene amount of blush to your cheeks.
You swallowed hard, taken aback but definitely curious, “Does he?”
“He talks about you all the time,” She added, without thinking twice.
“Really?” You smiled awkwardly, trying to act normally but also to get more information so you could figure out if she was telling the truth of just making it up just like kids do.
She nodded once again, “He says you’re pretty and that he really really likes you,”
“When does he tell you all this?” You probed, gently.
“Whenever we see you or after he calls you,” She informed, “And done,”
“May I take a look?” You smiled, but you were distracted.
She grabbed a small mirror and held it up to you face. It was an interesting look that she had given you to say the least.
“What do you think?” Zara grinned.
“I’ve never looked better,” You confirmed.
“Really?” She exclaimed.
“Really,” You nodded, inspecting your face closer up and chuckling.
“Daddy come look,” Zara suddenly said, looking past you and looking at the other end of the room.
“Woah, Y/N…” Nick commented, coming into purview and taking a look at you.
“You don’t have to say anything,” You interrupted, “I look fabulous,”
“Zara should do your makeup everyday,” He winked.
“I was about to say the same thing,” You laughed, trying to be serious.
“Anyway, you need to go bed,” Nick said, turning to face Zara, “And after you do I’ll negotiate your fees,”
He then began to usher Zara out the room and gestured silently to the bathroom to wash your face. Around twenty minutes later, you came back out dabbing your face with a towel. Making a last ditch attempt to get all the makeup Zara had put on you. The towel was still covering your face when Nick walked back into the room as you had wondered out of the bathroom.
“She’s asleep,” Nick announced, you could only imagine her confused expression.
“Be prepared you’re about to see my makeup free face,” You warned semi-seriously.
“I’m sure I’ll be fine,” He chuckled as you shook off your towel.
You made eye contact as soon as you lifted it up and his reaction was silent.
“I did warn you,” You commented awkwardly, not breaking the intense gaze.
“You look beautiful,” He breathed.
“As always,” You joked, trying to ease up the nervousness you were feeling.
“As always,” He agreed, still serious.
“Do you need help cleaning up the files?” You asked.
“No, I got that done when Zara was giving you a makeover,” He informed, “I actually found something we didn’t go over?”
“And what is that?” You asked, switching into work-mode immediately.
After that revelation you found yourself once again sitting on the floor with nick surrounded by files as you went through files trying to uncover motives and any other information relevant to the case. But this time you both nursed the beers that you had brought plus some extra that Nick had produced from his fridge. The forgotten file actually provided some substantial information so it took a while to go through it all. By the time you were finished it was early morning.
“I should head off,” You announced, standing up, yawning and going to grab your coat.
“Y/N, you can’t drive home,” Nick reminded, looking up at you.
“I wasn’t going too,” You insisted, “I was going to walk to my Dads,”
“It’s late Y/N and that’s really far to walk,” He argued, standing up.
“I need to sleep Nick,” You sighed.
“You can stay here,” He suggested.
“No, no,” You denied, “I couldn’t do that,”
“Why not?” He shrugged, “You can take my bed,”
“I can’t do that,” You said.
“Of course you can. I’m offering,” He insisted.
“Don’t you have a spare room?” You asked.
“It’s being renovated,” He informed.
“Can’t I take the couch” You inquired.
“Wasn’t raised to let guests sleep on the couch,” He added.
“Where will you sleep then?” You asked.
“On the floor,” He explained, “It’s great for the back,”
“Are you sure?” You questioned.
“Of course,” He reassured, “I’m not letting you drive and I’m not letting you walk to your Dads at this time and in this state,”
“I didn’t drink that much,” You insisted.
“Still, it will just be easier for you to stay here,” He countered, showing you to his bedroom.
An hour later, you were laying in Nicks bed unable to sleep. You were wearing one of Nick’s shirts and you underwear as you obviously you didn’t have anything else with you. Nick was sleeping on the floor beside the bed as you didn’t want to displace him too much. It had been around thirty minutes since you had both said goodnight and you had just been staring at the ceiling. You assumed that he was sleeping. You were breathing heavily as you processed everything that had happened tonight. The touches, the gazes, the smiles and especially what Zara had told you.
“Can you not sleep?” Nick’s voice suddenly inquired out the dark.
“You’re awake?” You said, not moving and continuing to look at the ceiling.
“I was waiting for you,” He informed.
“Why, so you could stare at me sleeping?” You teased.
“Obviously,” He sighed, the discontent evident in his voice.
There was a silence.
“I heard what Zara told you,” Nick suddenly announced.
“Oh you did?” You played off, trying to be casual, “I’m sure she was just messing around,”
“What if she wasn’t?” He asked.
“Wasn’t she?” You entertained.
“How would you react if she wasn’t?” He clarified.
“I would ask how long you had felt this way,” You continued, inching closer to Nicks side so you could peer down and look at him.
“What if I said one year?” He countered.
“I would say I’ve been feeling the same way,” You informed.
“For how long?” He asked.
“Six months but probably longer,” You responded.
“What about your boyfriend?” He asked.
“We broke up,” You informed, at the edge but still looking up at the ceiling.
“When?” He inquired, his voice perking up.
“Three months ago,” You mentioned.
“Why didn’t you tell me,” He asked taking hold of the hand that you had let dangle over the side, he stroked it instinctively as he held it.
“I couldn’t talk to you about anything involving romance or relationships without most likely descending into a conversation about how I feel about you,” You confessed.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” He probed.
“I was embarrassed for one. You were just getting divorced and I thought you wouldn’t feel the same way,” You admitted.
“Are you crazy?” He exclaimed.
“Maybe,” You nodded, finally turning to look down at him, “But most definitely about you,”
The room was only illuminated by a single ray of moonlight. You saw Nick in it’s glimmer and he looked as handsome as ever.
“Ditto,” He whispered into the darkness before leaning up and grabbing hold of you to kiss you.
The kiss was deep and passionate and your hands both roamed each others bodies. Somehow Nick hoisted himself up on the bed with you and you ended up on top of him. Leaning and pressing down into him as you continued to kiss him. Breathing a second priority in that moment.
Things continued and escalated to say the least. Layers were removed and his hands fell dangerously to you waist. You were nothing but encouraging of what you knew was going to happen next.
“Are you sure?” Nick asked, pulling apart after minutes of pure magic and passion.
“Are you crazy?” You mocked, chuckling, “Of course I am. I’ve been waiting for this,”
“Ditto,” He said once again before kissing you once again.
#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#svu#svu imagine#blue bloods imagine#Blue Bloods#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#Nick Amaro#nick amaro imagine#Detective Nick Amaro#nick amaro fanfic#imagine#Reagan#svubloods
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Imagine your brother Danny not being impressed with your boyfriend Nick
(A/N: For Anon, I hope you and everyone else enjoys! Sorry, it’s late!)
Imagine Danny not being impressed with your boyfriend Nick
“So why weren’t you this nervous to meet my other older brother, or my grandfather or my father for that matter?” You inquired, sitting on the couch, flipping through a magazine as Nick emerged from you bathroom after spending a good hour getting ready for dinner.
“Because I want to impress him,” He replied, smoothing out his pants.
“And you didn’t want to impress my Dad?” You countered.
“No, of course, I did and I think I did impress him…?” He began to explain but paused to ask.
“You’re good,” You confirmed, flashing him a quick comforting smile.
“But Danny unlike your Dad won’t have any problems with hanging me off a roof if he doesn’t like me,” He explained.
“Pretty sure that was Steve McGarrett and not Danny,” You corrected before pausing to think about it to make sure you weren’t forgetting, “But then again he may have done it and not told me but usually he tells me when he does that sort of stuff so I don’t think you should worry.”
“You fill me with so much confidence, Y/N,” He stated bluntly in an unimpressed sarcastic monotone.
“Don’t worry Nick. I’ll protect you,” You chuckled, tossing your magazine and getting up and smoothing out your own dress, “He’ll have to get through me first.”
“Once again so much confidence,” He sighed, walking towards the door.
“Hey,” You protested, “I’ve saved your ass lots of times.”
“Sure you have,” He said sarcastically.
“You’re only lying to yourself,” You commented, holding your arms across your chest and narrowing your eyes at him.
“I just agreed with you,” He defended.
“You were being sarcastic,” You pointed out.
“Well, you’re always sarcastic so I thought why not give it whirl,” He countered with a large over exaggerated grin.
So defensive and I didn’t even mention the amount of time I’ve kicked your ass,” You commented, off-handedly as if he wasn’t supposed to hear.
“That’s because you didn’t give me any warning,” He played off as you grabbed your bag and he opened the door.
“Was ‘go’ not enough of a warning for you?” You countered, puling face.
He pulled a face, “Can you just?”
“Alright, alright. I’ll lay off you because you’re so nervous,” You gave in before leaning in and giving him a brief kiss, playing with his tie as you did but once you broke away you said, “Though piece of advice you may want to put on some chapstick before you spend all night kissing Danny’s ass. You’re a bit dry,”
He narrowed his eyes at you.
“And I’m done,” You grinned, “Let’s get moving. Danny doesn’t like it when his dates are late,”
With only a sigh as a response, you walked out the door first. He wanted for you to go ahead before slapping your ass in retaliation and to get you to move faster as he shut the door and headed down alongside you. You swatted at him playfully before your hands entwined as you headed down to his car so you could to the restaurant where Danny and Linda for that matter were waiting for you.
It was strange seeing Nick so nervous for something. He was such a suave and confident guy seeing him nervous was just so strange to you. He was definitely nervous to meet your Dad for the first time a couple of weeks ago but you think the fact that he had met everyone else there beforehand calmed him down. As he had some people on side, particularly Erin, Nicky, and Linda but you won’t lie and say Jamie didn’t have a positive affliction for him either. So that definitely helped with the nerves. Plus though intimidating your Dad is a very calm and collected person he judges on character and ultimately you knew Nick fundamentally was a good person so you didn’t worry too much about it.
Danny on the other hand you knew was going to be a different story. Danny was more impulsive, some say aggressive you say deeply passionate but no one could deny he was an incredible cop, one of the best. Though you like to say he is an even better brother. You and Danny were really close despite the fifteen year age gap between the two of you. You’re really close with all your siblings of course but you had a special relationship with Danny. He was like your best friend, brother and a second father all rolled into one. You were the baby of the family and he treated you as such. It was the same with Erin and Joe who are and were twelve and ten years older than you respectively.
It was just different with Danny though. When you were born Danny was around fifteen years old and was going through a really tough time. He was just lost and like a lot of kids was confused about where his life was going. It was just worst because Danny’s fiery personality meant he was just getting into trouble. And then your Mom went into labor a month early and Danny was the only one there because he had been suspended from school. He drove her to the hospital after only one driving lesson and stayed with her until your Dad got there. He was the first family member besides your parents to hold you. Your Mom told you that be burst into tears at the sight of you but Danny always forgets that part when he tells the story.
And after that, he cleaned up his act. Joined the force and the Marines respectively when of age and got together Linda. He says that holding you for the first time made him realizes that there was more to life than screwing up. Real fulfillment came from the ones you love. He said that you were so small that day and the world was so big and he just had to do his part to make it better for you. So you shared a special bond. You think that he found it easier to talk to you and tell you things because he knew that you wouldn’t judge him. And you did talk a lot. When he confessed to you about the PTSD and stuff you went to Linda and you Dad to get help for him. You like always were a little more reserved but if you were going to confess something it would be to Danny.
Danny was very important to you and you think because nick knew this was why he was so nervous. And if you were being honest you were a little too despite your cool and playful demeanor before.
When you introduced Nick to you family that was the first time you had ever done it. Introduce a guy to your family. Which consequently also meant this was the first time you were introducing a guy to Danny. And you really wanted Danny to like him. You were hoping that he would meet him at the same time as your Dad but Danny was suddenly taken out of town so he missed it. Nick, unlike your other family members, had never met Danny before. Just heard horror stories which are another reason why he was so nervous. So Danny had suggested that the three of you have dinner which you knew for Danny was just code for ‘I’ll interrogate him and you can eat dinner while I do it’ so you convinced Linda to come along as a protective barrier and as a comfort blanket for Nick. It would be less intimidating.
You and Nick had been dating for around nine months at this point. You had a kept it a secret for quite a while as he had just become your Sergeant which made the fact that you were dating even worse, job-wise, than when you were partners. You and Nick were infamous for bad timing. When you realized you liked him as more than a partner he had just finalized his divorce and clearly wasn’t ready to be an in a relationship. Nick says he realized he was in love with you when he was getting the divorce and while you were in your last relationship.
It wasn’t serious or anything but more serious than any of your other relationships but saying that all that really meant was that lasted longer than three months. You were always a bit weary of long term commitment which is why none of your relationship before Nick surpassed max four months and why none of them ever met your family officially.
You and Danny had discussed your lack of actual relationships a lot. He made you confront things about yourself which you wouldn’t have if he wasn’t there. Like a therapist. A small angry therapist. It was because of that conversation you realized you could accept your more than friends feelings for Nick and eventually tell Nick about how you felt.
You and Nick had been partners for over two years prior to dating, ever since he joined Special Victims back then. You started dating when he became your Sergeant and you got a new partner, Sonny.
Everyone would always you were a couple before you started dating when you were partners. Strangely, though you got much less of that now that you were actually dating. You think it was because you and Nick worked so well together.
You were very different but also very similar. Your whole relationship was formed on originally finding each other the most annoying people on the planet and teasing each other. Sure, it developed a mutual understanding and respect and then a friendship and then a very close relationship but you had assumed that was the limit. He was very by the book and work orientated, he wanted the job done and of course, he had his own temper. While you were much more relaxed when it came to things and rarely got angry but when you did everyone knew it was serious. You encouraged Nick to relax and he kept you in line. You balanced each other out and ultimately made each other better cops. But because of your differences, you never stopped teasing and arguing with each other like a married couple. You made each other laugh and smile, he understood and was willing to listen to your deep ramblings and you could always make him see the bright side of things. You could switch from playful to serious. You just had fun and loved being with each other. Could you really help falling in love, you think it was obvious in hindsight that the two of you were truly made for the other.
So when you finally started dating it truly was one of the nest days of your life. You were just so excited and you had never felt that way in a relationship before. You weren’t scared of hitting all of those big milestones anymore. Though you can admit nine months was a bit long to wait before introducing a guy to you family, But in your defense, you didn’t actually know when the right time was to officially introduce a guy as your boyfriend to you family. You probably would have waited longer if Danny had interrogated it out of you one Sunday lunch in front of everyone. He sensed something was off and he had been for a while but had waited because he had a feeling what it was and wanted to wait and do research.
You had admitted to him privately prior that you were seeing someone a couple of months before to Danny but you didn’t think much of it because you were always dating someone. You didn’t tell him who then but he got out at lunch.
“You’re not really nervous are, you?” You questioned, as you and Nick walked hand in hand still to the doors of the restaurant.
“No, are you?” He countered.
“A little,” You confessed.
“Why are you nervous?” He asked.
“Because if he doesn’t like you we’re over. And I would hate to see this end so soon.” You replied in dead serious tone.
You watched his face change dramatically.
“I’m sorry. I had too,” You giggled.
“I hate you,” He snapped while breathing in relief.
“Come on tough guy,” You giggled, as you pushed him through the door of the bustling restaurant first.
You and Nick had arrived before Danny and Linda so you got seated first. Which was a good thing as you defiantly needed to get Nick to relax a little more before they arrived.
“At least we aren’t late,” You commented, taking a seat as Nick slide in beside you.
“Does he not like it when people are late?” Nick questioned.
“People don’t like it when other people are late,” You quipped, “It’s rude,”
“Why can’t you help me through this stress instead of making it harder,” He asked.
“It’s more fun this way though,” You pouted, tilting your head in his direction.
“Seriously?” He responded.
“I joke through anxiety,” You said, “I know you already know this,”
“I do and I’m curious as to why you are nervous,” He chuckled.
“I really want him to like you as much I do but not really,” You confessed, “I just really want this to go well,”
“And why is that?” He probed, enjoying himself.
“Because I love you,” You stated.
“I wasn’t expecting a serious answer,” He commented.
“Well, you got one,” You smirked.
“I love you too,” He replied before kissing you again before pulling away and saying, “Plus it’s nice to see you worked about something,”
“You like seeing me in distress?” You accused.
“Of course not,” He said, rolling his eyes, “You know sometimes I feel like I’m more into you than you are to me. I mean look at you and then look at me. You could have any guy you wanted,”
“You’re not terrible looking, seen .you know.” You teased.
“I feel so good about myself,” He winked.
“You don’t really think that do you?” You asked.
“Of course I do,” He confirmed, “Like I said look at you. You’re gorgeous,”
“When I have a ton of makeup on like tonight,” You played.
“Even when you don’t have any makeup on. You’re still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen,” He said sincerely, looking into your eyes.
You couldn’t help but blush.
“You’re really selling yourself short,” You insisted, playing with his tie, “I have always thought you were the handsome guy I’ve seen.Definitely the hottest cop I know,”
“It’s not that hard considering you’re related to half the police force,” He quipped which earned a playful hit from you, “You’re still blushing!”
“I can’t help it!” You stated, “You’re being all sweet and stuff, it’s so sickening. I’m embarrassed for you really,”
“You know you’re really cute when you blush,” He commented, biting his lip.
“Aren’t I always cute?” You countered, raising your eyebrows.
Nick rolled his eyes once again, licked his lips before leaning in for another kiss.
“Yeah, we better get all this PDA out the way before Danny comes,” You mentioned as he pulled away yet again.
“Is he not a fan of PDA?” Nick asked.
“Not when it involves his baby sister,” You corrected.
“Such a smartass,” He tutted, leaning back in his seat and looking at you with a smile.
“But you like that don’t you?” You teased.
“One more time?” He pouted.
“Fine,” You gave in, kissing him again.
You had intended for it to be brief. But lets just say the two of you got a little caught up with each other. You and Nick were like that. You couldn’t keep your hands off each other unless you were at work of course. It wasn’t in the way you would think, it wasn’t always sexual. You kissed a lot sure but mostly you just liked being able to grab hold of him whenever you wanted, because finally he was yours. And you just simply loved holding hand. To you it was way more intimate and romantic act than kissing and making out. There was just something about feeling the constant fireworks you felt whenever you touched.
“Ahem,” A voice said which caused the two of you to pull apart and look up..
“Danny. Linda,” You greeted, getting up so you could hug them, “Hi,”
“Hello,” Linda chuckled as you hugged her, “To the both of you,”
“Hi Linda,” Nick said.
“Danny,” You said again with a big smile as you hugged him.
“Y/N,” He said in sickly sweet tone.
“Danny,” You began once again, your arm still around him as you turned to introduce, “This is my boyfriend Nick Amaro,”
“Nice to meet you,” Nick jumped, extending his hand towards Danny.
“I’m sure it is,” Danny responded, taking his hand firmly and shaking it.
You watched Nick hand turn white because of Danny’s tight grip but he looked unfazed. After a brief moment of silence you all sat down. You asked Linda about the boys which handled the conversation side of things for about ten minutes. Throughout you could feel Danny’s gaze on the two of you but mostly on Nick. You and Nick like always were holding hands, it would have been unnatural for you not to. You kept squeezing his hand reassuringly. Everyone ordered quickly and things finally started at that point as soon as the waiter walked away.
“So how did the two of you meet?” Danny asked, suspiciously, eyeing the two of you up.
“On the job,” You stated annoyed because you knew that he knew this, “We were partners,”
“And what are you now?” He asked.
“I’m her Sergeant,” Nick replied.
“Do you sleep with all the detectives under your watch,” He snapped.
“No, pretty sure he doesn’t sleep with Carisi,” You countered.
“Danny,” Linda warned.
“Alright,” He sighed, “Tell me about yourself Nick,”
“Well…” Nick began.
After that point dinner transformed into an interrogation with fancy food and mood lighting. But luckily for you and Nick you think it went well. He was charming throughout, Linda loved him but no too much and you caught Danny slipping up his cold exterior a couple times when he found similarities between himself and Nick.
All and all you were convinced that Danny liked Nick but you had to wait until you were alone to ask him about it. Which happened when Nick left to make a phone call and Linda went to check on the boys at their sleepover.
“So…?” You prompted, as soon as they were out of earshot.
“So what?” He entertained, leaning back and taking a drink.
“Daniel,” You scolded.
“What do you want me to say?” He asked.
“Just tell me what you think,” You pleaded, leaning across the table.
“Why do you care so much about what I think?” He inquired.
“Because you’re my big brother and you’re important to me,” You replied, shaking your head at him in disbelief.
“And you are very important to me,” He smiled sincerely for the first time all evening.
“Your opinion matters to me,” You reiterated.
“What did Dad think about him?” He asked.
“He said as long as I’m happy he’s happy. Nick was a gentlemen and if he hurts me then we’ll see,” You repeated.
“Yeah I’m feeling the same way but if he hurts you I’m hanging him off the empire state building and letting go,” He smirked, raising his eyebrows.
“You like him,” You beamed.
“He’s alright,” He corrected.
“So you approve?” You asked.
“You don’t need my approval. Never have. Proved that when you dated a criminal in high school,” He reminded.
“He lifted some sunglasses as a bet and how do you know about him?” You informed and then asked.
“I know everything,” He said suspiciously.
“Sorry about that,” Nick smiled, sitting back down, “What did I miss?”
“Just sibling stuff,” Danny responded.
“Then I won’t ask more,” He said, smiling at you.
“Better not,” Danny commented, taking another swig.
The dinner ended after that. You were so excited, it was strange. It was like for the first time since Joe and your Mom, you felt content. There wasn’t this massive piece of your life missing anymore. It was a really good feeling.
“That was amazing,” You practically squealed as soon as the door of your apartment closed, “He loved you,”
“Sure did…I mean was…” He fumbled suspiciously, putting his hands in his pockets and tapping his foot nervously.
You turned and looked him up and down, suspiciously, yourself. Nick was never good at hiding his emotions or lying…to you at least…for that matter.
“Why what’s wrong?” You demanded, walking up to him and looking up at him.
“I can’t lie to you,” He began, avoiding your gaze but you could see the hurt in his eyes.
“Look at me,” You insisted, reaching up for his face, “What happened?”
“He told me to break up with you,” He revealed.
“He what?” You demanded, shocked.
“I couldn’t not tell,” Nick confessed, “He told me that I should ease out of it. You know distance myself from you and then end it,”
“When did he say this?” You asked in disbelief.
“When you were in the restroom with Linda,” He continued, as if he was deeply conflicted about telling you all this.
“I can’t believe he’s done this,” You sniffed, tears filling in your eyes.
“Hey,” Nick comforted, reaching for your face this time, “Are you okay?”
“No,” You stated, wiping them fiercely, “I’m pissed. How could he do this? He told me that he liked you,”
“He did?” Nick questioned, “Why would he say that to you?”
“Throw me off,” You spat, “That bastard,”
“He’s still your brother,” Nick reminded.
“I’m going kill him,” You fumed.
“Y/N, I only told you because I know i can’t do it,” He said.
“Break-up with me?” You filled in.
He nodded, “I know he’s your brother but I’m not going to throw this away because he tells me too, even if he is scary,”
“He’s not that bad,” You insisted, “But I can’t believe he is doing this to me,”
“Y/N, I don’t want to ruin your relationship with your brother. I know how much he means to you,” Nick began.
“But you didn’t ruin Nick,” You interrupted, taking his hands into your and leaning against his body, “He did. He knows how much you mean to me and you were perfect tonight. I can’t believe he would do this,”
“I thought he didn’t know about us,” Nick asked.
“He didn’t but before we got together I would talk to him about you and how much you meant to me without names of course. He was the first person to guess after we started seeing each other that I was dating someone. And I told him all about how much you helped me heal after everything I’ve been though and how you have helped me in ways that I didn’t even know I needed help. You’re one of the best things that ever happened to me. I love you so much,” You explained, tears spilling down your cheeks.
“I love you too,” Nick smiled, gently colliding his forehead with yours, “So much that I can handle him hating me for the rest of my life if it means I get to spend it with you,”
“You won’t have too,” You said stepping out of his reach, “I’m going to go talk to him,”
“No Y/N,” Nick began to argue.
“Nick it isn’t about him not liking you. Yeah, it was important to me but I don’t live to make others happy. I spent too much of my life already doing that. I live to make myself happy. I’m going to go talk about him interfering in my life. Telling you to break up with me is too far,” You stated, grabbing your coat and charging of the door.
“Do it tomorrow,” Nick argued.
“Why?” You countered.
“Because you’re angry right now and you need to think about it for a little longer,” He explained.
“When did you become all rational about anger?” You inquired dropping your bag and kicking off shoes and ultimately giving in.
“Second I saw you angry,” He chuckled, “You’re scary,”
“You don’t know the half of it,” You smirked.
“Let’s go to bed,” He suggested, “Might the last night we get too,”
“Not funny,” You commented as you walked past him into the bedroom.
“Just like you then,” He countered.
The next morning you weren’t any less angry despite Nick’s best efforts. It was Friday so you had to go to work and you knew Danny would be as well. But you couldn’t help but seethe about it all day. Nick kept a watchful eye on you to ensure you didn’t escape and release an unholy triad on Danny but to no avail. You slipped out at lunched and stormed down to the 54th precinct.
“What are you…” Danny asked in your direction as you charged into his squadron.
“Interrogation room two…now,” You ordered not even stopping as you left him in your wake.
He quickly obliged, something about your demeanour must have tipped him off. He walked in and took a seat and you slammed the door behind him.
“Hey that wall can’t any more slams,” He commented causally, “I do it too much already,”
“How dare you?” You asked.
“How dare I what?” He countered.
“Don’t give me that Danny!” You stated, “Nick told me what you said to him. You too him to break up with me,”
“He told you that?” Danny countered.
“Of course he did,” You said, “Because Danny he isn’t just going to dump me because my insane older brother tells him to,”
“But isn’t he worried that you might be as crazy as me?” He smirked.
“I’m not kidding Danny,” You spat.
“You’re really angry aren’t you?” He asked, folding his arms and looking up at you.
“Of course I am,” You sighed, “You told the man I love to break up with me,”
“You love him?” He asked.
“Yes, but that isn’t the point,” You sighed once agin getting frustrated, “What the hell were you thinking?”
“What the hell was your man thinking telling you what I said to him,” He said casually.
“Did you think he was just going to dump me because you threatened him?” You interrogated.
“Sort of,” He pouted, “I’m quite scary. When did he tell you what I said?”
“Last night,”
“Why did it take you so long to confront me?” He asked.
“Nick stopped me. He says that there was no point confronting you angry because we’re so close that doing it might ruin our relationship,” You explained, “He told me to wait and calm own a little,”
“Didn’t work,” He commented.
“He tried his best. Kept at the station all day,” You confessed.
“Really?” He questioned, surprised.
“Yeah,” You stated, confused by his reactions, “Why aren’t you defending yourself?”
“For what?” He asked.
“For lying to me or for telling my boyfriend to break up with me,” You reminded.
“Can’t defend the boyfriend part but I can defend the first bit. I didn’t lie,” He stated, “I liked Nick,”
“You did?” You questioned.
“Yeah he was a nice guy,” He clarified, “I think he’s great for you,”
“Then why did you tell him to break up with me?” You interrogated.
“Would you believe me if I said it was for fun?” He joked.
“No,” You stated, unwilling to participate and unimpressed.
“It was a test,” He finally revealed.
“A test?” You countered in disbelief.
“Yeah, a test,” He confirmed before explaining fully his reasoning, “I needed to make sure that he wouldn’t run away at the first sight of trouble. I know how much you like him. I needed to make sure he wouldn’t break your heart because there is a problem. Even a big one like an important family member not liking them.”
“By asking him to break up with me?” You accused.
“I knew he wouldn’t but I needed to make sure,” He elaborated, “And if he did he wouldn’t be worth your time anyway,”
“Why?” You demanded.
“Life is hard Y/N. You need someone despite any repercussions will tell you how it is. He knew how close we are and still told yous something that could potentially end a very important relationship for you. And he did that because he didn’t want to lie and because he really does love you. You clearly are as important to him as he is to you,” He explained sincerely, clearly speaking from a place of concern.
“I can’t believe you,” You commented, annoyed beyond belief at that point.
“I’ve always got your back,” He grinned gleefully, “Even when you don’t think I’m there,”
“I can’t even be mad at you,” You sighed, collapsing into the opposite seat in relief.
“Because you know it came from a good place?” He inquired, cheekily.
“Sure,” You said, rolling you eyes.
“You’re so relaxed now,” Danny observed.
“Now that I know my brother isn’t an insane interfering bastard, I’m sort of at ease,” You gave in, messaging your temple, “But you’re still freaking crazy. Couldn’t you have come up with a better way to test him?”
“But it wouldn’t have been as fun,” He smirked playfully before cackling with laughter.
“I’m going to kill you,” You threatened.
“I’ve lived a long life,” He chuckled.
“Can’t wait to tell Nick about this,” You breathed.
“Was he sacred?” Danny inquired.
“He was sad,” You corrected.
“At what?” He asked.
“The prospect of breaking up with me,” You reminded, as if it was obvious because it obviously was.
“Anyone else would be relieved,” He teased.
“Just for that I’m going to tell him you like him,” You smirked.
“Don’t do that,”
#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#svu#SVU fanfiction#svu imagine#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#Nick Amaro#Detective Nick Amaro#nick amaro imagine#detective nick amaro imagine#Danny Reagan#danny reagan imagine#imagine#svubloods
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Imagine being Sonny’s sister and your boyfriend Jamie helping you reconnect with your family
(A/N: Sorry for the wait… a continuation suggested by @delnquents I hope you and everyone else enjoys this)
!WARNING: Reader has anxiety and family issues/Includes a scene with a therapist!
Continuation of an imagine you can find HERE
Imagine being Sonny’s sister and your boyfriend Jamie helping you reconnect with your family
Imagine being Sonny’s sister and your boyfriend Jamie helping you reconnect with your family
“How would you feel if we spent today's session talking about your family,” Your therapist suggested as soon as you sat down.
“How about we don’t?” You countered swiftly.
“Y/N,” She tutted, disapprovingly, “You can’t avoid the subject forever,”
“Fine,” You gave in reluctantly, shifting uncomfortably in your seat, “What do you want to know?”
“Do you get on with them?” She asked.
“Well enough,” You responded, quickly.
“What does that mean?” She countered.
“Depends on which family member we are talking about,” You replied.
“Remind me who is in your family,” She prompted.
“Are talking about just immediate family?” You asked to clarify.
“You can do extended if you would like,” She offered.
“Then we would be here all night,” You chuckled dryly, “I am Italian after all.”
“I forgot,” She smiled, “Just who you think is relevant,”
“Well, I have an older brother,” You began.
“And that’s Sonny?” She questioned.
You nodded.
“I also have two older sisters and their husbands and kids, there is my mom and dad and my Grandparents on my Dad’s side and my Nonna on my Mom’s,” You listed off.
“So why are you so averse to talking about your family?” She inquired gently.
“Well, I talk about Sonny,” You reminded, avoiding the question.
“I get the feeling that is because he’s the one you’re closest too,” She commented.
You nodded again.
“Why?” She inquired once again.
“What do you mean?” You responded.
“Why are you closer to Sonny than your older sisters for example,” She elaborated.
“We are closer in age. I’m the youngest of four he was the third. Grew up together. I don’t know,” You offered complacently.
“Well you grow up with you sisters, why aren’t you close to them?” She pointed out.
“We’re just different,” You shrugged.
“And you and your brother are similar?” She continued to probe.
“No, not really,” You sighed, “He’s just more open and I guess understanding. He’s different in his own way,”
“How so?” She probed.
“Like he’s more accepting of me,” You tried to clarify, though you don’t think you were doing a good job.
“What do you mean?” She asked.
“I’m not like the people in my family. I’m different and Sonny is the only one who accepts me for me,” You explained.
“What do you mean by that?” She pressed.
“I’m not the traditional girl my parents wanted to raise, I guess,” You explained, “And Sonny is the only one that is fully okay with that,”
“How are you different to them?” She asked.
“I come from a very traditional roman catholic family. It’s big, it’s loud and very religious. Two of my cousins are priests. My parents don’t understand why I don’t want to get married and have children straight away, they don’t understand why I want to wait. They don’t understand why I come to therapy you know and I every time I try to explain they ask why I can’t talk to them.” You explained.
“And why can’t you talk to them?” She asked.
“Because they don’t understand how their daughter can have such different ideas and just be so different,” You spluttered, “I don’t believe in God. I got kicked out of Sunday school because I asked too many questions. So they punished me and tried to put the fear the god into me. They didn’t get why I’m not loud and over emotional like they are. I’m quiet and an introvert. I express with action, not words. They just didn’t get it so they treated me differently. Like they were so confused by me constantly so it was just easier to keep to myself. Which meant I just spent my time alone overthinking and since I felt like such a disappointment to them I just started getting anxious about the things I say and stuff because I didn’t know what would set them off,”
“Do you think how they treated you contributed to your anxiety?” She asked bluntly.
“Maybe,” You sighed, “I can’t blame them for everything.”
“You said they treat you differently,” She picked up.
“Yeah,” You nodded.
“How so?” She pondered.
“They don’t seem as proud as me as they are my siblings,” You confessed.
“You’re a social worker who has been recently promoted and is often regarded as the best in her departments,” She recalled, “I can’t wait to hear what your siblings do,”
“My brother is a Detective and my sisters both have part time jobs,” You informed.
“And your parents treat them differently,” She prompted.
“Sisters are perfect daughters who are always around with their own kids while I’m not and my brother is my brother. He gets a free pass,” You explained, “But it isn’t even about that,”
“Then what is it about?” She asked.
“They’re normal and I’m not,” You answered simply, “They aren’t atheists, or anxious and they all want children as soon as possible,”
“You don’t want children?” She inquired.
“Now I do,” You smiled, “Since I met Jamie just not right now,”
“Did he change your mind about the subject?” She questioned.
“No, he just made me realize that I wanted kids and that I was just saying I didn’t because I thought no one would want to have them with a screw up like me,” You shrugged.
“You aren’t a screw-up, Y/N,” She reminded.
“Hmm,” You let out, “They don’t accept me but our relationship is getting better,”
“Yours and your parents?” She asked.
“Yeah,” You confirmed.
“Why is that?” She inquired.
“Jamie,” You revealed with a helpless smile, “He has this charm and this way of speaking that is really hard to resist, honestly I will never understand how anyone could hate him. I knew they would like him but they really like Jamie. They love him. They’ve literally told him that they’re so happy that we’re together because they were worried that I wouldn’t meet anyone with my ailments,”
“Why do you think they like Jamie?” She probed.
“He’s a good guy. Religious enough for them, smart, family orientated. Not to bad to look at. He’s just a great person,” You offered.
“Not because he treats you well or makes you happy?” She smiled sadly.
“I don’t know if they care,” You lied.
“Do you feel loved by them?” She confronted.
“Of course they do. I am their daughter,” You replied, “But the level varies. Usually, it’s normal amount that you would expect but then they get reminded that I don’t go to church or I get anxious. I can feel it go down. So when things are good I’m just waiting for the ball to drop,”
“And that makes you anxious,” She continued.
You nodded.
“How has it been going recently,” She asked.
“Better…” You admitted.
“And why is that?” She inquired, folding her legs and delicately chewing the end of her pen as she focused.
“Because of Jamie,”
Your session continued for around 40 more minutes after that. You continued to discuss the inner workings of your somewhat strained relationship with your family as candidly as you could manage. It felt awkward because you had been raised never to speak about family dysfunction outside of the actual family but that had been the case throughout going to therapy. It was hard to open up and talk about hard stuff.
It was an unexpectedly tense session so by the end of it, you were definitely exhausted. Which wasn’t good because you were about to go on a getaway to Montauk with your boyfriend, Jamie. In fact, he was waiting outside so as soon as you finished you could embark on your 4-hour drive down. Probably not the best idea but once again you didn’t think it was going to be like this, you thought you would discuss going on a semi spontaneous trip with your boyfriend for a few days, which is something that the both of you rarely did but since you had just been promoted and you were also both fast approaching your anniversary, your eighteenth month anniversary, which you wouldn’t really be celebrating if you weren’t going away.
You and Jamie like you said had been dating for around a year and a half at this point and it has just been amazing. He was sweet, sensitive, strong and funny plus to you, he is beyond the word handsome. Way too handsome for you but he didn’t think so apparently and he hated it when you say it. He truly is the best human being you’ve ever met. You just connected on this level that you had never experienced before. You were so different but it was also like you were two half of a whole. You loved being with each other and you hated being apart. You could do everything you’ve ever wanted and the best part of your day would still be when you met up with Jamie. Which usually was first thing in the morning as he was basically living in your apartment at this point.
You weren’t lying when you told your therapist that he has an ability to charm anyone. You knew that your parents would like him but you didn’t think that they would as much as they do. They love Jamie and unfortunately, you also aren’t lying when you say that they probably love him more than you, because it’s probably true. Being him definitely helped your relationship but you were still distant from them. Though Jamie encouraged you to spend more time with them. You introduced Jamie to them after three months of dating and you were introduced to the Reagans at six months for other reasons. But ever since Jamie met your parents you’d been going to your own weekly family dinners more often, though you tried to avoid them as much as you could.
You much preferred the Reagan family dinners and had attended every single one since you were first invited. You got on well with the Reagans and they had quickly accepted you into the family and now around a year on from when you officially met them, you were quite close. For the first time, you felt like you were apart of a family that accepted you completely, without judgment. You think it’s because none of them were the same, they were all black-sheep, like you, thrown together. There was no stereotype or expectation to adhere to.
You knew that Jamie didn’t always understand how you could be so distant from your family especially as he was so close to his own but he always tried. And he was very understanding of your anxiety, even though he hadn’t been close in contact with it before. You tried to keep it from him for the most part which he didn’t like. So to counteract that he always held your hand in public just in case you ever felt anxious.
“How was it?” Jamie asked, with a comforting smile as you slipped into the passenger seat.
Jamie was already dressed for the beach and the hot weather predicted. Wearing blue shorts and a white t-shirt with stripes of various colors as well as having sunglasses hanging off so they could easily be slipped on.
“Good,” You lied, wiping your face tactfully to make sure that you had got all the tears.
“Are you okay?” Jamie asked sympathetically, reaching out your hand because he always knew when something was wrong and when you were lying.
“A huh,” You said with an exaggerated nod before taking his hand and kissing it before turning and flashing a smile, “Promise,”
“Okay,” He sighed, not completely satisfied.
“Let’s get going, huh?” You suggested shaking the emotion off and faking it expertly, “We have an anniversary to celebrate,”
“Don’t you mean a promotion?” He smirked, as he started the car and began driving.
“Then it wouldn’t be a treat for the both of us?” You countered.
“Celebrating you is a treat for me,” He insisted.
“Anniversary celebrations are more romantic,” You reminded.
“You can make anything romantic if you try hard enough,” He commented.
“Can you now?” You entertained.
“Well, we don’t ever have to try,” He grinned, “It always feels romantic when I’m with you,”
“That wasn’t as smooth as you think it is,” You mentioned.
“Guess I’ll just have to try harder,” He winked.
“I can’t wait to see this,” You chuckled.
You and Jamie continue to chat for the next hour as you continued to embark on your adventure. After that, the conversation died down as you had taken an unexpected, impromptu nap. When you woke up you on your last hour of the journey.
“Look who's up,” Jamie said as you stirred.
“How long was I asleep for?” You questioned, stretching.
“Just under two hours,” He replied, looking at you briefly.
“I don’t know why I’m so tired,” You yawned.
“Especially since you went to bed at 9 last night,” He commented.
“I wouldn’t be going anywhere if I didn’t do all those double shifts last week,” You reminded.
“And I appreciate it,” He chuckled.
“Do you want me to take over?” You inquired.
“No, I’m good,” He insisted, “You might fall asleep at the wheel if your as tired as you claim,”
You just shook your head and settled into your seat.
“So do you want to talk about what’s on your mind?” He asked.
“What do you mean?” You questioned.
“Something is up,” He insisted.
“I’m fine,” You countered.
“No, you aren’t,” He countered sadly, “I can’t enjoy myself unless you’re okay,”
“Jamie, I’m ok…” You want to say.
“You aren’t okay,” He interrupted and rectified, “Come on Y/N, please,”
“My session was just a little more intense than I expected,” You finally gave in and offered, bowing your head.
“Can I ask what you talked about,” He probed gently.
“My parents mostly,” You confessed.
“Really?” Jamie said in surprise, he knew that you had tried adamantly, “That’s great,”
“Great?” You questioned.
“You had to talk about them eventually didn’t you?” He asked, “I mean you’ve been avoiding it forever so it’s good that you finally discussed it,”
“Didn’t have to be today though,” You huffed.
“Why not?” He asked.
“Because I don’t want to talk about it,” You said.
“Sometimes we have to feel bad to feel better,” He stated.
“But it isn’t going to get better,” You sighed, “No matter how much I try. I can’t change them, can I?”
“Maybe you don’t have to change them, maybe they are doing that themselves,” He counteracted.
“Do you know something I don’t?” You questioned, folding your arms.
“I think they have started to change in relation to trying to understand you,” He elaborated, “I think they have started to try and see things from your perspective,”
“Just because dinners are less tense doesn’t mean they have started to change,” You countered.
“Well, why do you think they are less tense then?” He inquired.
“Because they like you,” You replied, “Nobody can resist that Reagan charm,”
“Well, I can’t really argue with that,” He chuckled, “But it’s not just that,”
“But it is,” You insisted, “To them, you’re the best decision I’ve ever made,”
“Do you not agree?” He teased.
“Depends on the day,” You smirked.
“I know you say that I have a natural talent to ‘charm’ anyone,” He began, “But you have a gift of making whoever you encounter feel loved. You are so selfless that you give yourself to people and they pick up on it. I’ve seen it, Hell, I’ve felt it. You make people feel like they are important because you genuinely listen and take in what they say. I think it why you are so good at your job. The kids you work with haven’t had anyone tell them they are important or made them feel like they are. But then they meet you and from the second they do, you can see it in there eyes. You make them feel important. It’s one of my favorite things about you. It one of the many reasons I love you,”
“Jamie…” You went to say.
“Let me finish,” He insisted, “And it’s because of that and all the other things that make you the incredible person you are that I think that they are changing. I’m not the only one that is seeing all the good you do. They are too and I think they have made them try harder with you. And you may not see it because you are so sure that they hate you that you don’t even pay attention. But they don’t hate you. They love you so much. They just didn’t know how and I’m not excusing how they treated you before but I think they’ve realized that they can’t make you into who they want you to be. Especially not now because they are starting to appreciate the amazing person you are,”
“I don’t know what to say,” You let out, overwhelmed.
“They’ve told me that they feel bad and they want to try and understand,” He revealed.
“When?” You interrogated.
“Since you’re always late to dinner on the rare occasions I get you to go we have a lot of time to talk,” He confessed.
“Talk is just talk,” You played off, “They haven’t ever done anything to prove this,”
“Because they don’t know how and it’s not like you ever give them a chance either,” He commented.
“So it’s my fault,” You related.
“That isn’t what I’m saying and you know it’s not,” Jamie insisted, “They are so proud of you, Y/N. They just don;t how to express it because they didn’t expect it. They treat you different because you are so different and they didn’t know how to handle it. They realize that it wasn’t the best way now because they feel like they’ve lost their daughter.”
“You think they are proud of me?” You asked.
“I know they are,” He smiled, “You know when you were in the paper a couple of months ago for your work at the youth center?”
“Yeah,” You nodded.
“Your Dad has that article framed on his desk,” He revealed.
“How do you know that?” You inquired, “When did you go to my Dad’s work?”
“I had some business around there and I stopped by and saw it,” He offered, “And my Mom always asks how you are while I help her cook while I wait for you to get there,”
“So why can’t she tell me that?” You asked.
“When do you give her the chance?” He countered.
There was a silence between you.
“Maybe I should call them and let them know what we are doing?” You said.
“Okay,” Jamie nodded casually but you could tell he was happy for you, “I know they would want to hear about our plans,”
“Maybe I can if they want a postcard for their collection,” You continued, “They haven’t ever been down here,”
“I’m pretty sure they would love that,” Jamie smiled.
“I could maybe invite them to that award ceremony next week as well,” You suggested out-loud once again.
“Everyone else is coming,” Jamie grinned, “Why not invite them,”
“I’m going to do it,” You stated, grabbing of your phone, tapping away and putting it up to your ear, “Hey Jamie,”
“Yeah?” He prompted.
“I love you,” You said.
“I love you too,” He replied.
Your Dad was definitely surprised to get your call as you never ever called out of the blue like this, in fact, you can’t even remember the last time you called him. He seemed excited at the prospect of coming to your awards event even though you reminded him it was off for work. It was a nice conversation that branched off naturally onto your plans for yours and Jamie’s time away. It was nice, strangely.
“I have to go now Pa,” You announced after a good ten-minute conversation.
“Okay caro, Rimanga secure,” He waved off, “I love you,”
“I love you too,” You struggled.
“Say hi to Jamie and make sure you say yes,” He said before prematurely ending the call.
“What?” You went to say before you realized that the call had ended.
“So?” Jamie asked as you put the phone down.
“He and Mom will be there,” You retold.
“That’s great,” Jamie grinned as he turned the engine off as you had reached your hotel, “I;m so proud of you,”
Jamie leaned over for a hug which you automatically and eagerly and reciprocated.
“But…” You said as he pulled away.
“But what?” Jamie questioned.
“He said something about saying yes to you,” You explained.
Jamie's face reacted in a minimal way as if he was trying to hide something.
“And you know exactly what he is talking about, don’t you?” You confronted.
“Well, I wasn’t exactly planning on asking you this in a carpark,” He sighed, “But since I know now that you know something is up that you won’t drop it. I guess I will just ask.”
“This better not be what I think it is,” You commented, “There isn’t enough room in this car to react,”
“It’s not,” He ensured, “But it is a step in that direction,”
“Okay…” You dragged out.
“I was planning on asking you probably over a romantic candle lit dinner if you wanted to move in together,” He revealed.
“Oh Jamie,” You smiled, “That’s so sweet,”
You leaned over and kissed him.
“Well?” He asked as you pulled away.
“Oh right,” You spluttered, realizing you hadn’t actually answered, “Of course I want to move in with you,”
“Great, I’m just sorry I asked you here and not over that dinner or the beach even” He beamed helplessly before kissing you again.
“Don’t worry here was perfect,” You commented as you broke apart once again, “Even if it means that’s another thing you were right about,”
“What?” He questioned.
“We really can make anything or anywhere romantic,”
#Jamie Reagan#jamie reagan imagine#officer jamie reagan#officer jamie reagan imagine#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#blue bloods fandom#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#sonny carisi#Sonny Carisi is coming up#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#imagine#svubloods
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Imagine Barba v Reagan custody trial PART ONE (TPELB SEVEN)
Masterlist With all the Parts HERE
Imagine Barba v Reagan custody trial PART ONE
“May I make an observation, Y/N,”
“It’s your hour,” You shrugged.
“Actually it’s yours,” She reminded with a small comforting smile, “Which is what I wanted to say. We've had a couple of sessions now Y/N and you haven't really discussed how you feel about what is going on for you at the moment,”
“I have my reasons,” You offered.
“Would you like to share those with me?" She inquired simply.
"Your services are being paid for by Mr. Barba which understandably could make you bias so I feat whatever I say could easily be misinterpreted into supporting him,” You elaborated.
“I’ve noticed that you rebel from anything involving your Father,” She observed.
“He’s not my Father,” You stated.
“Even the mention of him, you rebel,” She continued.
You shifted uncomfortably in your seat and looked around the room for the umpteenth time this session. You were in a yet another session with your court mandated therapist. She was nice enough and very good at her job. It took a lot of effort to deflect her questions and not reveal too much to her. You were weary about opening up but most of the time you ended up doing just that. You feared to have all your private thoughts and feelings aired out for your family to hear. You often used the excuse of her having a bias as a reason to deflect. It was clear bias, its how it works in the real world. Though you knew deep down that she obviously didn’t have one but it was a sufficient enough barrier to stop yourself from talking. You tried to get things out of her instead as your Law Guardian had just concluded the ‘discovery’ stage of your case which meant that she had interviews with all of you family members, teachers and anyone else who is in contact with you. Though you weren’t supposed to know this, you just researched it.
“Y/N,” She began in a soothing tone, “I’ve been doing this for a number of years now. It’s very common for the petitioner to pay for this service in this sort of case. I’ve managed to maintain unbiased in all the cases before yours. My sole job is to look at things objectively and ensure whatever is decided is what is best for the child or children involved. What do you think would make me bias in this case?”
“He’s very convincing,” You replied.
“So are the Reagans,” She responded.
“You’ve talked to them?” You asked, faking surprise.
She nodded, “I’ve talked with everyone directly involved at least once,”
“Really?” You questioned, confused.
“Usually I wouldn’t but due to the unique and complicated nature of this case, your law guardian thought it would be best for me to have context so when I put forward my professional opinion it would be ensured to be in your best interest,” She explained.
“Is it really that unique of a situation?” You asked.
“Long lost parents are extremely rare,” She chuckled, “In fact, this is my first ever case where it has happened.”
“Should I feel special?” You muttered.
“No,” She smiled comfortingly once again, “You should feel special because there a lot of people that love you very much and what I gathered from talking to them is that they just want the best for you. Granted both sides have very different ideas of what is best for you,”
You just nodded before looking away.
“Y/N, I’m getting the feeling that this rebellion against your Father isn’t because you don’t like him, I think you do like him, I think you do it because you don’t want to feel like that you’re betraying your family,” She revealed.
“I don’t like him,” You insisted.
“You can like a person and not like their actions. They aren’t mutually exclusive,” She reassured.
You pulled a face.
“I don’t know how I feel about him,” You gave in and finally confessed, “Sometimes I hate him and sometimes I’m okay with him but I don’t want to live with him,”
“And that’s for definite?” She asked.
You nodded.
“I don’t know why everyone keeps asking me if I’m sure or not. Would you want to live with a complete stranger?” You countered.
“I wouldn’t,” She agreed, “But hypothetically say if he did things in the way you wanted them. By getting to know you first and communicating with your family. Would you consider living with him then?”
“No,” You replied, “If that were the case maybe weekend stays or something but primarily I would like to stay with my Grandfather.”
“So there is no circumstance where you considered living with your Father?” She inquired.
“Yes,” You confirmed, “Unless circumstances completely changed and I had known him my whole life,”
“Are you angry at him?” She asked out of the blue.
“I’m just confused as to why he doing things this way when he had other less drastic options,” You replied honestly, “I’m upset, confused and angry,”
“Do you hate him?” She asked.
“No,” You admitted, “I wanted to for you know for putting me through this mess but I can’t for some reason,”
“It’s a parent thing,” She chuckled, “No matter how much you dislike what they are doing. You still love them because they're your paren,”
“I’m not familiar with parent things,” You commented.
“I know this is a new world for you. Having an actual parent and I understand it’s going to be hard for you to adjust. But you will eventually.” She sympathized.
“I’ve never needed a parent,” You commented, “My family has always been enough,”
“I understand Y/N and I’m not taking away from what they have done. They have clearly raised a brilliant, intelligent and talented young lady. And there is no doubt that they haven’t given you everything you’ve ever needed nor does anyone think they are inadequate in any way,” She reassured, “But I just get the impression that sometimes you have wondered what it would be like to be like an average kid.”
“And what if I had?” You countered.
“It would be okay,” She smiled, leaning forward in her seat to you, “Nobody would blame you for doing it or even thinking about it on occasion. We all do it.”
“Do what?” You asked.
“Think about how our lives could be different if certain things weren’t like they were,” She elaborated.
“What do you think about then?” You asked.
“I think about if I had become am Artist like I wanted to when I was a teenager or what my life would be like if I had stayed with my college boyfriend,” She offered, “What about you?”
“If my Mom was alive mostly,” You confessed, “And what my life would be like if my Dad had been in my life,”
“You don’t talk about your Mom much,” She commented.
“I have my reasons,” You said once again.
“Do you miss your Mom, Y/N?” She probed gently.
You shook your head sadly.
“You don’t seem so happy about that answer,” She observed.
“I try. I really do,” You sighed, “But I can’t miss her like everyone else does. And it’s frustrating because no matter how much I hear about her. I just don’t feel connected to her and it feels like there is this big part of me that’s missing because she’s not here. It’s very confusing so sure I wish she was here but I don’t miss her. I don’t remember having her or having this part of me and you can’t miss what you don’t remember having,”
“That must make it hard for you,” She sympathized.
“Not really,” You lied, “I just deal,”
“I talked to your English teacher yesterday,” She announced after a brief silence.
“Okay,” You replied, confused.
“She talked about a letter you wrote to your Mom,” She continued.
“I gave it to her by accident,” You excused, “I was inspired by her assignment and I was just compelled to write it,”
“Do you have it still have it?” She asked.
“Why?” You countered.
“She said it was very moving and revealing, not to mention well written,” She informed.
“I shredded it,” You admitted, “It felt good to write it though,”
“That’s good,” She smiled.
“I guess,” You shrugged, uncomfortable once again.
“What do you think your life would be like if your Mom was alive?” She asked.
“Different,” You stated.
“Are you ready for things to be different, Y/N?” She asked.
“I don’t know if they will be yet,” You commented.
“I think it will be regardless of what happens,” She insisted, “Your life isn’t ever going to be the same,”
“Why do say that?” You questioned.
“Because I got the impression that regardless of what is decided your Dad going to fight to be a part of your life,” She responded, “It’s just a question of when you’ll let him in,”
The session quickly finished after that. She told you that she would see you soon at the trial. It seemed like your whole life as it drew closer was consumed by the trial. It was the only thing on your mind. You’d been away from you family for months only surviving a couple of visits a week. You just wanted it all to be over but on the other hand, you feared that the trial would end in the way you feared it might.
The next day, you were scheduled to see your trial judge for a private meeting in his chambers. So you went down to the courts with your Law Guardian Garret and Will. Judge Barker was running late so Garret through it would be a good idea to get you familiarized with the court room and take the time to talk you through what will happen.
“I imagine you’ve been in lots of courtrooms,” Garret commented as you raced to the top of the empty court room and took a seat in the witness box, both of them following closely behind.
You nodded, “I used to come with my Aunt Erin all the time,”
“So I guess I don’t need to go through much,” He smiled.
“Not really,” You agreed, “Why are three desks?”
“Well, unlike most cases which had two. Child custody cases have three parties which mean they have three desks. One for me and you, one for your family and one for Mr. Barba,” He explained.
“Which one are we?” You inquired.
“Doesn’t really matter but typically I go for the middle one,” He informed.
You nodded in understanding before darting your eyes around the room, as if you were soaking it in. You could see it all from your slightly elevated position in the witness box.
“Do you have any more questions for Garret?” Will asked, approaching you and leaning against the box in front of you.
You shook your head.
“Are you still okay with going on the stand?” Garret asked, taking a step forward himself, “Because of you…”
“No, I want to,” You interrupted to insist.
He nodded and was about to say something else when Judge Barker’s secretary popped his head around the door to announce that he was ready for you. You, Garret and Will quickly head back down the corridor towards the office. They assured you once again that it was nothing to worry about before ushering you in.
“Ahh, you must be Y/N,” He smiled as you stepped into the room and closed the door behind.
Judge Barker was a tall burly man with a graying bread. He was sitting at his desk and watching you intently, still in his robe.
“It’s nice to meet you, your Honour,” You greeted, walking over and extending your hand to him.
“The pleasure is all mine,” He grinned before gesturing for you to take a seat.
“I’ve been hearing a lot about you young lady,” He began.
“You have?” You questioned.
“Well, I should say reading a lot about you,” He clarified, with a friendly beam.
“Oh,” You let out with a little jump in your seat.
“You are quite an impressive young lady,” He complimented, “Very much like your mother,”
“You knew my Mom?” You questioned, surprised.
“Everyone knew your Mom,” He chuckled, “She was a firecracker. Her departments ADA had a very hard time controlled her,”
“You dealt with criminal cases?” You asked.
“I did for twenty years,” He confirmed.
“Why did you change?” You probed.
“Well, my son went through a divorce and I thought it was handled badly by the presiding judge so I decided I couldn’t let that happen to others,” He explained.
“That’s sweet,” You smiled.
“So, should we get down to business?” He asked.
You nodded.
“I bet you're tried of being asked who you want to stay with, huh?” He asked.
“Definitely,” You agreed adamantly.
“I have a pretty good idea of what you want already,” He said, “I’m also sure that you know that the law is hardly on your side with this one,”
“I know,” You said sadly, “I just hope you see the special circumstances in this case. One of them being what I want,”
“That will be a very important part of my judgment,” He assured.
It wasn’t too long of a meeting as Judges are very busy people. He assured you that he was ultimately going to act in whatever way was best for you. You got the feeling that he was being truthful with you so his sentiment somewhat instilled confidence in you.
Your meeting with the Judge marked a week until the trial started. You can’t even decide if that week went quickly or not. Time seemed to go in this strange wrap were it both went fast and slow depending on the time of day. Nor could you decide whether or not you wanted it to go faster or slower.
You just wanted to go home. You didn’t think you would every miss the musky old man smell of your Grandpas house or Pops singing in the morning. You missed your room and feeling connected. You missed going to family dinner every week and the cleaning up party you all had afterward. You missed being confused by whatever sports game they had on. You just missed home and your home was your family.
“You ready kid?” Will ask, as you stopped before the door of the courtroom.
“Nice suit,” You quipped, trying to be causal.
“What can I say, I get dressed up for my ladies,” He winked playfully.
“You just look weird,” You continued to probe.
“I wear a suit every day to work,” He defended.
“I don’t pay attention to you,” You reminded.
“I bought this tie for you,” He informed in mock offense.
“I appreciate it,” You smiled, gripping his arm harder, “I don’t know if I want to go in,”
“You can leave whenever you want,” He reminded, “You don’t have to be there the whole time. Your the first witness so at first you’ll have to wait in the witness room and then you can sit with Garret at the desk,”
“Then why did you bring me to the courtroom and not the witness room?” You asked.
“I thought you would like to take a look at everyone in there so it wouldn’t be so scary when you went on the stand,” He explained, “Plus I know a couple people you want to see are already in there,”
“Can I?” You asked, hopefully.
“I’m not going to let anyone stop you,” He promised, “Not today,”
You finally let out a breath before walking quickly walking into the courtroom. It was bustling as everyone got settled before the Judge sat. You could feel eyes on you. As it was a family case it was private to the public so everyone in the room was familiar to you but you didn’t care. You just kept walking forward towards the bench until you saw the faces you were looking for.
“Grandpa,” You finally let out when you saw your Grandpa, who was standing by his desk, his back was to you so you saw him first.
“Y/N?” Your Grandpa questioned quickly, spinning around as if he didn’t do it fast enough that he would miss you.
“Hi,” You beamed before running up to him and engulfing him into a hug.
“Hello,” He chuckled, holding onto you tight as he bent down so he could be at your level, “I was wondering when I would see you,”
“I came looking,” You informed, clinging onto him tightly.
“I got the feeling,” He smiled.
“I miss you so much,” You sniffed, finally letting go.
“I miss you too but it will all be over soon I promise,” He whispered in your ear, still holding onto to you.
“But what happens when it does?” You questioned.
“We will figure it out,” He promised, rubbing your back, “Like always because we are a team,”
“Are we still a team?” You asked.
“We always will be no matter where we are or who we live with. We will always be together no matter what,” He insisted.
You pulled away and he wiped your tears.
“There are some other people that are excited to see you,” He informed, pointing behind you.
You turned around to see your whole family behind you. You took turns hugging them all. They all promised you that it would be okay but they hugged you tight as if it would be one of the last times they would be able to. You wanted to stay for longer but Will motioned to you that it was time to go before everything started. He was standing in front of you and then proceeded to circle the room in a different path so you could meet at the door. You clung on as soon as you could before you had to leave. Your families lawyer began to talk so they became immediately distracted.
You turned to leave and took a couple of steps, keeping your eyes on the floor so no one could see your tears and because you did you collied with someone. Someone with really fancy shoes, the sort of shoes you Grandpa wore to events and funerals.
“I’m sorry,” You quickly apologized, looking up.
“Y/N,” Mr. Barba greeted.
You were shocked to see him but couldn’t let out any words. You were flustered and didn't know what to do. It wasn’t like you had anything to say to him anyway.
“I have to go,” You spluttered, walking away quickly, not looking him in the eye.
“You don’t…” He began to say but you didn’t hear the rest as you walked away so
You sped out the room quickly and obviously, you looked a bit startled because Will asked if you were okay. You lied and said that you were okay and you both headed into the witness room. Will came and sat with you and ensured that he would be the courtroom when you got up and that you could look at him if you didn’t know where to look. You guess he knew that you tended to zone out when Garret explained court procedure.
Like Will had said you were the first one to be called. Time definitely seemed to slow when you took the walk down the corridor to the court and when you finally got in and were escorted to your seat. Once again you could feel eyes on you. You didn’t think you would have trouble finding someone to look at but you had so you were glad you could look at Will. As you took a seat you flashed a smile to your families side as you glanced over them.
It was arranged like Garret had said. He was in the middle while your family was on the right side and Mr. Barba and his lawyer were on the left. You avoided looking at the left. You just knew that you couldn’t look at him. You were too upset and you were filled with all these emotions and sure you weren’t as angry as before the letter but you had the feeling that you would be again by the end of it.
As there were three parties it meant that you were being questioned by three attorneys. They all played softball with you as nobody wanted to be seen as putting pressure on the kid in question, nobody wanted to look like the bad guy. Garret and your families lawyer just asked you to reiterate what you wanted.
“Y/N, you’ve told us what you want,” Your Grandpa’s lawyer began, “Would you mind telling us why you don’t want to live with Mr. Barba,”
“I don’t know him,” You replied honestly, “Not well enough anyway. We were starting to get close before all of this happened but really we’re strangers. He just walked into my life as someone that my Aunt worked with. Not my Father,”
“Is that all?” He prompted.
“And I don’t agree with how he’s done this. My family was willing to compromise with him. They are really open people and they just want the best for me. If I said I wanted to get to know him they would work to make that happen because they don’t have an alterer motive. They just love me and I love them so so much. To be honest I’d probably be more willing to get to know my him if he hadn’t done things like this,”
“What do you mean by that?” He continued.
“I mean there is a reason I haven’t had any contact with him since I found out he was my Father. It’s because of the way he has done this. He has taken me from my home, my life, my routine and most importantly my family.” You clarified, finally turning to look your Father in the eye as you began to plead with him. “I understand that it isn’t fair for you but what you’re doing isn’t fair on me. I get it, I can’t imagine what it must be like to find out you had a kid that you didn’t know about. And I know to make up that you want to start trying but this isn’t how it works. You don’t instantly become a parent and maybe that’s why you’re doing this because you don’t know how actual parents would approach this. Because parents don’t get to be selfish which is what your choices are. You’re being selfish and parents are supposed to put their kids first,”
“Thank you, Y/N,” He nodded, “No further questions,”
“Thank you,” You said impulsively as he walked away.
“Hi Y/N,” Miss Hennessy, Mr. Barba’s lawyer, said as she got up from her seat and approached you.
“Hi,” You let out wearily.
“I’m going to keep this quick. I know how scary it can be up there,” She smiled.
“I’m fine,” You insisted.
You won’t say that you were as cordial with Mr. Barba’s lawyer than you were with Garret and you families attorney. You were a tad sharp with her because you wanted it over as quickly as possible with this. You think you did a good enough job with redirecting all your answers back to the point that you didn’t want to live with Mr. Barba.
“Y/N, how do you feel about your Mother?” She asked suddenly.
“What does she have to do with this?” You countered.
“Your honor,” Garret said standing up.
“Answer the question,” Judge Barker instructed.
“Depends,” You offered.
“She is the reason we are here. She didn’t tell anyone who your Father was and then she died without saying anything,” She explained, “So in that sense how do you feel about her?”
“I can’t really comment on her and her actions. I’m sure she had her reasons,” You replied, “But I do feel bad,”
“For yourself?” She probed.
“For Mr. Barba,” You clarified, “Like I said I can’t imagine how hard this is,”
“So you sympathize with him?”
“To an extent from an outsiders position. But in mine, like I said again. I think it’s selfish to tear apart my life to try and fix a wrong that happened to him,” You answered.
“But do you understand where he is coming from?” She inquired.
“Not really,” You confessed, “There were other ways of doing this. And I’ve said them a couple of times already,”
“Are you upset?” She asked.
“Of course,” You reiterated, “I’m tried. I want to go home and I’m really sorry Mr. Barba. I really am but my home isn’t with you. I’m really sorry that my Mothers actions stopped you from getting to be my Father. And you may be my Father by blood but you aren’t my Dad. I wish you were but I grew up without a Dad and making me live with you won’t magically make you one. The closest thing I’ve had to a Dad is my Grandpa.”
“You’ve always wanted to know who your Father was, haven't you?” She asked, unfazed.
“Yes, it’s natural to be curious, right?” You responded.
“Of course,” She agreed, “But it must have been extra hard on you as you didn’t have either parent,”
“My family made it easier,” You smiled, glancing back at them.
“But they can’t do that all the time can they, can they?” She inquired.
“No, but they try their best,” You nodded.
“But it doesn’t always work does it?” She continued.
“What are you getting at?” You asked.
“I’ve read the letter you wrote to your mother,” She informed.
“That was private, how did you get that?” You demanded.
“Y/N, why don’t you tell us what you wrote about how you feel sometimes when you are with your family.” She inquired.
“That isn’t relevant,” You insisted.
“I think it shows that you need an actual parent in your life,” She said.
“That isn’t about my Dad. It’s about my Mom,” You informed.
“You’re honor don’t you think that enough? Is any of this relevant?” Your families lawyer stood pup and questioned.
“She’s bullying her into saying what she wants,” Your Uncle Danny suddenly interrupted.
“Danny!” Erin scolded.
“It’s true,” He insisted.
“Your honor all my questions are relevant. I’m showing that the perfect picture that they are trying to portray isn’t a hundred percent accurate. I’m not denying that they haven’t done a good job. I’m just saying that there are some issues that need to be addressed,” Miss Hennessy tried to
explain.
“Like what?” Danny demanded.
“How about the fact that you’ve been lying to her about her Mother’s death?” Mr. Barba suddenly got up and accused, glaring them down.
“You want to talk about lies?” Your Aunt Erin countered, enraged, standing up herself now, “How about the fact that you’ve lied to everyone about not knowing that Y/N existed until a few months ago? I know for a fact that my sister called you when she found out she was pregnant to let you know and I can prove it too because I recorded it,”
#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#svu#svu imagine#SVU fanfiction#blue bloods fandom#SVU FANDOM#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#the people erika left behind#mini series#rafael barba#rafael barba imagine#ada rafael barba#ada rafael barba imagine#rafael x daughter#Frank Reagan#frank reagan imagine#Jamie Reagan#Danny Reagan#Erin Reagan#Joe Reagan#Reagan#jamie reagan imagine#danny reagan imagine#joe reagan imagine#imagine
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Imagine not wanting to tell your fiancé Jamie that you were injured on the job
(A/N: For @samanthaofanarchy . I hope you enjoy this. Sorry, it took me so long but I made it extra long for you and for making everyone wait for so long. Expect a Sonny request in the next few days to make up for the all the long breaks. I hope you all enjoy!)
Imagine not wanting to tell your fiancé Jamie that you were injured on the job
“Come here…” You shouted after your fleeing suspect.
Your suspect then quickly turned and slashed at you thoughtlessly.
You jumped back automatically and missed it by inches. You stumbled slightly on the rocky surface. You looked up after milliseconds of getting your bearings, you looked up only to find your knife wielding suspects coming for you once again. You delivered a swift punch that caused him to back up but it was momentary, he came at you again but you blocked his hand quickly holding it above your heads and struggled violently for a few seconds. He pushed hard and so did you in defence. He let out what sounded like a growl before kicking your legs causing you to stumble again.
And this time when you looked up you didn’t have time to dodge the knife. It slammed into your torso and ripped your skin.
“Son of a bitch,” You cried as you clutched your side as he retracted the knife.
In a second of pure adrenaline and anger, as you continued to clutch your side, you delivered a fast and impactful kick to the nether regions, which caused him to fall to floor howling in pain. You swore loudly and limped up against the wall, stumbling down the ally in an attempt to get away, in case he got up again. You weren’t going to be able to defend yourself again.
You heard Sonny reach your suspect and quickly handcuffing him but he left him attached to a fence to search for you. He must have seen the bloodied knife as he called for an ambulance and backup into his radio.
“Y/N!” You heard Sonny shout frantically as the noisy blast from the bullet subsided and the cackle from his radio as he finished his, “Y/N!”
“Over here,” You hissed, loud enough for him to here through clenched teeth after several failed attempts at it.
“Oh my God, Y/N,” He called as he came speeding down the alleyway that you had stumbled down, reaching your side fast and kneeling beside you, “What the hell happened?”
“The bastard got me. I was blocking his knife and he kicked me shin and made me stumble.” You retold, breathing heavily as you awkwardly clutched your slashed torso.
“It looks pretty deep Y/N,” He commented, taking off his jacket and pressing it into your wound.
“God dammit,” You breathed heavily.
“The ambulance is on its way, okay? Everything is going to be okay!” He reassured.
“It better be!” You cried.
“Y/N, you’re bleeding a lot,” He commented, as he pressed harder in an attempt to stop all the blood.
“Oh really?” You snapped, as pain vibrated through you, “I didn’t notice! It’s not like it’s pouring out of me!”
“It’s going to be okay,” He comforted, as the sound of the ambulance entered the atmosphere.
“I’m sorry,” You panted breathlessly, as you shifted out of your leaning position against the wall to lying flat on the rocky ground.
“It’s fine,” He chuckled, “You’ve just been stabbed. I think I can forgive you for being a snappy,”
“You’re right,” You winced as you clutched onto his forearm to help deal with the pain, “Why am I even apologising? You should be apologising to me, for not running fast enough!”
“I’m sorry I couldn’t keep up with two track stars,” He apologised jokingly.
“Good,” You whispered, wearily, your eyes suddenly becoming heavy.
“No, Y/N. You’ve hot to stay with me!” Sonny began to say panicked as you heard footsteps began running towards you both with impressive speed.
“But I’m so tried,” You let out, your eyes becoming increasingly heavy.
“Y/N,” You heard Sonny say again as his voice became distant as he moved away to allow the EMTs to cater to you.
You were only out for ten minuted before slipping back into consciousness. You were in the back of an ambulance with the sirens blaring. There was a man standing over you and Sonny was sitting by your side.
“Thank god, you’re awake,” Sonny breathed, grabbing hold of your hand as the ambulance sped through the streets to the hospital, “We’re almost there. I’m going to call Jamie, okay? He’s going to be there,”
“Jamie?” You questioned confused, your vision still blurry.
“You know? Your fiancé Jamie?” He reminded, his voice filled with concern and panic.
“No,” You said.
“What?” He questioned.
“Don’t call him,” You insisted.
“ You don’t want me two call him? Is that what you said? Why not Y/N, you aren’t making sense?” Sonny questioned in quick succession.
“Don’t call. Call Danny,” You elaborated, you eyes becoming heavy.
“Danny?” He probed, “Jamie’s brother?”
You nodded slowly in weak confirmation before slipped back into darkness of being out of consciousness.
You seemed to slip in and out of consciousness for the next half an hour add you reached the hospital and treated. Though you stayed under for the most part as you only remember being awake and aware for a few seconds each time before slipping under again.
When you became fully conscious again the pain had subsided partially and you could feel the bandages that were tightly wrapped around your torso. You were also in a hospital room and Sonny was standing in the corner on the phone.
“Y/N,” He sighed as turned back to look at you after getting off the phone.
“Hello to you too,” You winced as you shifted slightly in your position and while he walked back to your bedside.
“How are you feeling?” He inquired gently.
“Like I've just been stabbed,” You quipped.
“Nice to see that being stabbed doesn't effect your attitude,” He countered.
“Hmm,” You sighed, settling not so comfortably onto the bed, “How long have I been out?”
“Only half an hour,” He informed.
“Explains why these meds haven’t kicked in yet,” You breathed.
“It could have been much worse I hope you know that,” He pointed out.
“But it wasn’t,” You reminded, “Are you the only one here?”
“Yeah,” He nodded, nervously, “I haven’t called your family yet and I stopped the hospital from calling too,”
“Why?” You questioned.
“Because on the way here you were babbling about calling Danny and not Jamie and I didn’t know what you were saying. They said that you weren’t in any real danger so I thought it would be best to wait and see what you wanted when you woke up,” He explained.
“So, you haven’t called Jamie?” You asked.
“I’ve only called the Lieu,” He confirmed.
“Thank God,” You sighed in relief.
“Why don’t you want me to call him?” He asked confused.
“You know how he gets,” You began, putting your hand to your forehead, “He gets all worked up and worried. I don’t want him to stress out even more you know. It’s been a tough year for him, you know? I don’t want to bother him even more. Remember how he was when I fell out the window last year with the suspect? And he’s away on break right now with some of his old friends and he’s having a lot of fun. I don’t want him to rush all the way down here”
“Y/N, you know it’s because he loves you so much! He can’t see you hurt just like you can’t see him hurt.” Sonny said, shaking his head at you, “Plus it’s hardly falling through the window if you charge for it. It’s more like jumping,”
“Details,” You shrugged off, “This isn’t that serious anyway,”
“You were stabbed,” He reminded.
“But it doesn’t feel like it though,” You played off before offering, “It feels more like I was like lightly punctured,”
“What’s the difference?” He inquired.
“It’s less serious,” You nodded.
“Y/N,” He began in an exasperated tone.
“Sonny,” You interrupted, “I know it seems like this is serious but trust me it’s not as bad as you think it is. I bet you I won’t even have to stay the night. They’ll send me home in a couple hours with some pills and tell me to take it easy for a couple days,”
“Well, I know Lieu gave you the next couple days off obviously,” He commented, “But I think you’ll have to stay.”
“And if they do I’ll call Jamie but if they don’t you just have to keep your mouth shut,” You waged.
“I don’t know if I can do that,” He sighed.
“Come on, you’re sure right?” You insisted.
“I am,” He gave in, shaking your hand in accordance.
After that, he went to go find the doctor and he got him to examine you. He gave you a quick inspection and told you that you were very lucky as apparently if it had been a couple inches in any other direction it would have hit a major organ and you would have suffered major damage. But it hadn’t it was however pretty deep which explains all the blood. He said that it would take around six weeks for the wound to heal but you would have to take it easy for the next few weeks. Especially for the next few days, you shouldn’t move that much as it may cause more damage. And unfortunately, that was why he wanted to keep you in for a day or two and then set you on home, to self-care. Coming in for a check every week or so.
“Do you want me to call him or should I?” Sonny asked smugly after the doctor left.
“We aren’t calling,” You stated.
“I thought we had a deal,” He reminded.
“Well, since I’m the stabbing victim I get to decide,” You countered.
“I thought you weren’t stabbed,” He smirked.
“I’m the lightly punctured victim then,” You corrected annoyed.
“Let me call someone,” He pleaded, “What about you parents?”
“On a cruise somewhere,” You informed, “You won’t be able to reach them,”
“Then who?” He questioned.
“Call Danny,” You gave in, “He’s the only Reagan I can trust not to make a big deal out of this,”
“I’m not happy about this,” Sonny commented.
“That makes two of us,” You chuckled before stopping as it made your side hurt.
In about fifteen minutes after Sonny called Danny for you, Danny was running down the hall shouting at some nurses. He actually ran past your door. Then he doubled back, shaking off some nurses.
“I’m family,” He stated as he strode into your room, the disapproving nurses still following him, “Can you tell them?”
“Yeah, he’s my um…brother,” You agreed.
They nodded and walked off after that.
“Can you go anywhere without making a scene?” You joked.
“They kept saying it was family only,” He huffed, “I tried explaining that you’re basically my little sister but apparently you’re an only child,”
“I am,” You reminded.
“That doesn’t matter,” He insisted, “What the hell have you done to yourself? I get a call from this guy telling me you’re in the hospital but I can’t tell anyone and I have to get here as soon as possible.”
“I was lightly punctured while trying to arrest a suspect,” You explained in the simplest terms.
“What?” Danny asked confused, looking at Sonny.
“She was stabbed,” He clarified.
“You were stabbed!’ He exclaimed, his whole demeanour changes, “Kid, what the hell was you thinking?”
“That I was going to get stabbed,” You offered.
“My God,” He breathed, giving you hug and a kiss on the cheek, “You’re okay though,”
“Yeah, it didn’t hit anything major,” You reassured, “I’ll be here for a day max and then I’m on bedrest for the next couple of days. Desk duty for a couple weeks,”
“That’s good,” He breathed relieved, “I would have killed you if you had died,”
“Thanks,” You struggled.
“Have you called Jamie yet? Is he on his way? What about everyone else?” He asked continuously.
“No, no and no,” You responded, “You’re the only person I have told,”
“Why?” He demanded, genuinely confused, “Why isn’t everyone here? You should know that this isn’t how we Reagans do things when someone in hospital,”
“I know, it’s just that I don’t want to bother anyone you know? It isn’t that bad. It’s not like I was shot or I’m dying or anything.” You excused.
“But aren’t they going to find out anyway?” He questioned.
“Not if I deceive them and hide it from them?” You stated.
“Is that your plan?” He questioned sceptically.
“Yeah,” You stated obviously, “Here’s the thing. It’s Monday. If I take it easy on Friday night which is when Jamie comes back. I’ll be good enough and in six weeks when it’s all healed and stuff I’ll mention it,”
“You know how crazy you sound, right?” Danny questioned.
“You’re lucky I told you,” You snapped, “If you didn’t have our spare key you wouldn’t know either,”
“So, you want me to play along with this?” He sighed.
“All you have to do is not mention it,” You commented.
“I don’t understand why I’m going along with this,” Danny said out loud to no one in particular besides himself.
“For the entertainment value,” Sonny offered, “It's why I do it,”
“Hey, we wouldn’t be here if you could keep up,” You swatted.
“Track stars!” He sighed exasperatedly.
“Regardless,” Danny cut off, with a wave of his hand, “I’m still going to keep an eye on you. When you go home. I’m coming to see you every day. I don’t support this but I guess I love you so I’ll help,”
“You love me?” You asked, with mock emotion.
“I guess,” He played off, but clearly lying at your expense, “You’re like my sister so I sort have too,”
“Great job at expressing emotion,” You teased.
“Can we just pull the plug on her?” Danny asked, turning to Sonny.
You did end up staying at the hospital for that night but you were sent home the following day around midday. Jamie had called that night which he had promised on doing every night while he was away skiing with his college buddies up in Vermont. A promise that you regret making as Jamie was finding it was suspicious that every night around 7 when he called, you were always lying in bed. Which is what you mainly did as soon as you got home. To maximise the recovery time you had while Jamie was away.
Both Danny and Sonny made it habit to come around and check up on you every day. Both still trying to get Jamie, you didn’t want him to worry about you. You knew what it felt like to be worried about the person you loved. Jamie had thrown that moment where you question if you’ll ever get to say I love you again at you multiple times despite joining the force after you. And he was the careful one out of the two of you. You were just a lot better at hiding the life threatening stuff from him. You took risks on the job, you were just better at handling the effects of those choices. You had started your NYPD career in the SWAT unit as a specially trained officer. This is exactly the sort of situation you had been tinned to deal with. When you talked about work especially back in the days when you were in SWAT unit before joining Manhattan SV, you didn’t mention that sometimes the stories you told didn’t always go so smoothly as you made it seem.
The last time you got injured and let him know was when you shattered your shoulder and broke your leg after falling out of a window. You can just remember Jamie pacing around the bed while you were getting bandaged. He asked every few minutes if you were okay and doted on you unconditionally for the next couple days. He was just so on edge those days whenever you did something in case you got hurt even more that you knew that you couldn’t do that to him again.
So that’s why you decided to keep it a secret until it wasn’t that big of a thing anymore.
You and Jamie had been together for around five years now. You had met him when he was still under two years on the job. He was put on a protection detail and you being a member of the Special Weapons and Tactical Unit back in those days. You were on the team tasked with saving him. You got quite close, which is what happens when you have to stay with someone for twenty-four hours per day for multiple days.
You bonded a lot over the fact that a lot of the other cops on you respective squads looked at you slightly differently. He was a Reagan of course and son to the Commissioner. You, on the other hand, were the only child of one the cities most famous investment bankers and his infamous socialite wife. Neither of you was expected to become cops and because you had and because of your links they perceived you differently. It was nice having someone who understood and to have someone you could talk about it with. Which is what started it all. After everything settled down, Jamie asked you out. You’d been together ever since.
Even though you were dating a cop and a cop yourself. You don’t think either of you got used to that feeling that any time could be the last time you may ever see each other. You should have seen how excited Jamie was three years ago when you transferred out of SWAT and into SVU. He viewed it a much safer that SWAT, which is what is was but it didn’t really resonate with you until then.
“Jamie!” You called when you finally spotted him emerging from the gate.
It was Friday night and you were at the airport waiting for Jamie as he was coming back from his trip. It was also the first day since getting back to the hospital that you had ventured further than your apartment door. You were feeling much better at this point and could walk without hassle, you just needed to make sure you were jolted or touched in that area.
“Hey,” He grinned, changing direction so he was walking towards you.
“Hi,” You smiled, angling yourself so when he went for a hug that your body was away from his so he couldn’t squeeze you, “I missed you,”
“I missed you too,” He said, pulling into a hug and kissing you.
As he did, his arm went to go around your waist to pull you closer but you avoided his arm and stayed as far away as it was socially acceptable. When you pulled away you detangled yourself from his hands and took a step back. He looked confused.
“I missed you too,” You played off which he responded to with a usual smile, “Tell me everything,”
“You already know everything,” He chuckled, as you began walking out, you put your arm around his waist to avoid his suspicions.
“But it’s different hearing it in real life,” You entertained.
“Firstly, how are you doing?” He insisted.
“What? Why?” You fumbled, on edge.
“Because I haven’t seen you in a week,” He offered, raising his eyebrow.
“I’m good, great even,” You lied.
“Okay, then why acting strange?” He pointed out.
“I’m cheating on you, I’ve moved out all of your stuff and my new tall dark and handsome boyfriend have moved in,” You teased in a deadly serious tone.
“Every time,” He sighed, annoyed at himself, “Every time you do that I believe you for a second.”
“It’s okay babe,” You cooed, grabbing his face and squeezing it, “I won’t ever leave you,”
“But you may cheat on me,” He joked.
“Only if you know who becomes single,” You winked.
“We are never watching that damn show again,” He huffed, playfully.
Later that night, as you were both getting ready to go to bed. You had peaked his suspicions again as you had gone to the bathroom to get your pyjamas on instead of doing in the bedroom like normal. When you returned, he was lying on the bed, reading a book.
“I have a surprise for you,” He announced as you walked back in.
“You do?” You questioned, spinning to face him, “What is it?”
“Come here,” He beckoned.
You made your way over to him and carefully laid down on the bed beside him but as discreetly as you could to avoid even more suspicion.
“Well?” You prompted.
“I got you a souvenir,” He continued.
“I know,” You reminded, “You already gave me my hoodie and the keychain,”
“But I got you something else,” He insinuated.
“What?” You inquired, curious.
“To keep with our tradition,” He began, “Here’s your terrible souvenir,”
“Socks,” You exclaimed, as he reached from under the bed and handed them to you, “They truly are awful,”
“There not just any socks,” He pointed out, “They are goofy moose magic socks,”
“My God,” You giggled.
“Put them on,” He suggested.
You went to bend over but stopped after realising that could tear one of your stitches. So you stopped suddenly and straightened back up.
“What?” He questioned.
“Why don’t you do it for me?” You offered awkwardly.
“Why…?” He dragged out.
“Because it would be a nice thing for you to do after leaving me for a week,” You made up momentarily.
“Seriously?” He questioned.
“Does it look like I’m joking?” You demanded adamantly.
“Okay,” He dragged out once again, leaning down himself and pulling your leg closer.
You jerked away. He gave you another confused and frustrated look.
“Why are you making me move?” You demanded, admittedly stupidly.
“Fine,” He gave in, you could tell he was becoming annoyed by your behaviour, “There,”
He moved back into his position by your side and folded his arms and looked at you.
“Y/N, is something going on?” He asked, straightforwardly.
“No,” You lied.
“You know you can tell me anything,” He said, taking your hand.
“I know,” You smiled, leaning your head on shoulder tactfully, “And I do tell you everything. You know more about me than anyone else,”
“And you me but honestly, Y/N, it just seems like you’re keeping something from me, you know?” He sighed, biting his lip, “You’re acting strangely. You’re hot and then your cold. Have I done something?”
“No of course not,” You reassured and confessed, “No, I’m sorry. I am being weird and stuff. Honestly I…”
“What is it?” He interjected.
“I had a really tough week,” You said somewhat truthfully, “And you haven’t been here so I didn’t have anyone to talk to about it with so now I don’t know whether I should give in and be happy that you’re here now or be upset that you weren’t here when I needed you,”
“But we talked every night and you didn’t say anything,” He pointed out.
“I didn’t want to ruin your trip,” You said truthfully, “You’ve had a hard time with work and everything for the past few months. You deserved a break and to have fun, and that doesn’t involve worrying about me because I’ve had a bad week. Does that make sense?”
“Yeah,” He smiled, “And just so you know. I had fun with them this week but it doesn’t beat the fun I get to have with you every day. I love you,”
“I love you too,” You grinned before kissing him.
“Are you sure there isn’t anything else,” He asked, as you pulled away, still in his arms.
You nodded reluctantly, the guilt wrecking you but you just couldn’t bring yourself to tell him. Not now anyway, you didn’t understand why you were fighting this urge not to say anything.
“Good,” He smiled and that only crushed you even more.
“Yeah,” You returned, before lowering yourself down on the bed, so you could look up at the ceiling comfortably.
Jamie the following suit and laying next to you so he could look up as well but he only looked at you, “Do you want to talk about it?”
“What?” You countered, still looking up.
“Work, you said it was a tough week for you,” He comforted, rubbing your leg.
“Oh right, yeah! Maybe not just now. I’m not in the mood ” You smiled sadly, turning to meet his gaze.
“Is there anything else you’re in the mood for,” He flirted.
“Seriously,” You commented, unimpressed.
“What?” He shrugged, moving so he was on top of you, holding himself up with his forearms so there was still distance between you, “It’s been a week since I’ve seen you,”
“And you can’t handle that tough guy?” You smirked
“No,” He beamed, “I’m just crazy about you,”
“Ditto,” You teased before he leant in to kiss you again.
You let it go on as he was hovering a few inches above your body but you knew that Jamie would change that soon enough. You’re pretty sure where Jamie though this was going was on the list of extraneous activities that you were supposed to be avoiding.
But you let it go on because you had missed him a lot. Even though you were dreaded him coming back and keeping secret. You both had alone time of course but anytime that you could spend with Jamie you took advantage of.
Everything was better when he was around.
A few minutes of hot and heavy making out took place before hands carefully and luckily slide down the side of your body to the waist of your pyjama shorts. You pulled away before he had a chance to pull at them.
“Um, maybe I’m not in the mood for that,” You shrugged and excused, “I had a really long day today,”
“Yeah, I’m a bit tired too,” He retreated, getting off you, but you knew he was lying.
“Goodnight J,” You offered, switching your light off.
“Night Babe,” He returned, switching his own light off.
That night was rough. You made it a habit to avoid Jamie’s grasp when he reached out for you, claiming it was too hot to cuddle when he eventually asked after serval failed attempts to spoon. You could tell that his suspicions returned by that point and that he was annoyed that you hadn’t said anything.
The next day you had to go to work for one of your cases. So luckily you avoided him for that day and his incoming confrontation. It was a good thing that you went in on Saturday without Jamie as everyone was coming up and asked how you were doing. You knew that you were going to be on desk duty for the next week or so but it was nice to be back at work. You hadn’t enjoyed the week off as much as should have, mostly due to the pain.
Even Sunday you avoided him for most of the day up until Sunday lunch at the Reagans. You had been feeling progressively worse as the weekend went on. Your stomach was in knots and you were feeling uneasy but you had a feeling that it was more due to nerves than your injury.
“How are you feeling?” Danny asked cornering you and whispering.
“Awful,” You admitted, breathing heavily.
“Good, so we’re feeling the same,” He hissed, “I can’t keep this from him for any longer. It’s killing me,”
“Well, pull it together Reagan,” You sighed.
“Why can’t you just tell him so I can tell everyone else,” He demanded.
“I already told you why ” You reminded.
“No, you gave me some half-assed reason and mumbled,” He corrected.
“He already knows something is up,” You sighed.
“Great, there is your chance to tell him he’s right,” He insisted.
“I can’t,” You confessed.
“Why not?” He sulked.
“I don’t know,” You admitted, “I want to but I stop myself. And I keep telling myself that it’s because I don't want to worry him but I know that’s not it because he’s even more worried because I’m acting so strange,”
“He loves you. So much. He is always going to be worried about you,” Danny empathised, “Just tell him, sure he’ll he pissed you hid it but ultimately he’s just going to be glad you’re okay. So just tell him,”
“Maybe…” You went to say.
“Plus I told Linda and she is dying to tell Erin,” He informed.
“You told Linda?” You demanded.
“I don’t keep secrets from my wife,” He defended putting his hands up.
“Dinner’s ready,” Sean announced interrupting just like his Dad while running past you so he could tell everyone.
You and Danny dispersed after that. You both headed for the dining room and sat at opposite ends of the table facing each other. Jamie took his seat beside you and took your hand and gave you a smile. But it was off, you knew he knew something was up. You were feeling worse. You felt like you were going to throw up. Dinner progressed normally up until Erin asked you to pass a knife to her so she could cut Jack some chicken.
“Oh let me,” Jamie piped up, interrupting and picking the knife up himself and handing it to her, “Y/N isn’t that great around knives,”
After his comment, he returned to eating and started talking to his Grandpa Henry. Erin thought nothing of it but your eyes widened and Danny choked on his spoonful of mashed potato. Everything took more notice of that than Jamie’s comment. Danny gave you a look to ask if you “did he just,” and you nodded. Putting the both of you on edge. Dinner progressed and you and Danny kept giving each other looks.
After you were all wrapped up. Danny told you that he always knew that Jamie was strange. But then Jamie announced that you both had to leave early. You went along with it and left. The door shut and he walked ahead of you to the car. He got in first and shut the door. You slid in and you just knew that somehow that he already knew. As soon as you were buckled in he took off not saying a word. His hands were gripping the wheel hard. Your head was swirling at this point. You couldn’t think.
“When did you find out?” You asked.
“Thursday,” He stated.
A day before he comes back.
“How?” You inquired.
“One of the first responders to the scene work at the same station as me. He called me to give a hard time about not rushing back and seeing you. Imagine my shock when he told me. He didn’t even believe me when I said I didn’t know,” He explained, “I guess it’s too crazy to believe,”
“Jamie…” You began, resting your throbbing head on the seat.
“You lied to me, Y/N,” He said.
“If you had asked me were stabbed on Monday I wouldn’t have said no,” You pointed out.
He gave you a look.
“Sorry, not the right time,” You apologised quickly.
“You always do this Y/N,” He sighed.
“What? Get stabbed?” You questioned, pain still searing through you but you ignored it.
“No, you hide things from me,” He began to explain, “Whenever something bad happens at work, you don’t say anything. And if I ask you downplay it when I know it’s more serious than you make it out to be. Why don’t you talk to me about that stuff? I understood when you were in SWAT because it was just an everyday thing but now. I tell you when it happens to me. With this job, you need to talk to someone and you just bottle it up. You go to extreme lengths like hiding the fact that you were stabbed just to avoid talking about anything bad that happens to you. Why don’t you trust me?”
“It’s not that I don’t trust you,” You responded, rubbing your throbbing forehead, “I don’t trust myself. I’ve given so much of myself to you because I love and more importantly I trust you so much. You know more about me than anyone and sometimes I forget that I have you to depend on,”
“Y/N,” Jamie comforted, “You aren’t alone anymore,”
“I know,” You breathed, “I just was for essentially my whole that I just don’t know what’s like to be someone. To be a part of something but I’m going to work on it I promise. I want to be on your team and me don’t to lose you,”
“It’s not about that Y/N,” He sighed, “It’s about you letting me onto yours. We’re getting married. I need to depend on me like I depend on you. I don’t want you to end up hating me because you’re doing all the emotional work. I want you to lean on me too,”
“I could never hate you and that’s why I can’t,” You started to cry, “What if you fall out of love with me and I’ve given you everything. What happens to me then?”
“You think that I can live without you?” He questioned, his own eyes welling up “Because I can’t. From the second I met you I couldn’t get you off my mind. You’ve become a part of me. There is no me without you anymore. You have made my life so much better. I didn’t know what content felt like before I met you. You filled this emptiness that I didn’t even realise I had. I gave you everything I have Y/N because you are my everything. I’m not ever going to willingly leave you. I love you,”
“I love you too,” You whispered, the pain overwhelming you.
“What it was serious?” He inquired, “What then?”
“I don’t know,” You mumbled, your eyes heavy.
“I’m not asking you to tell me all your secrets but important stuff like being injured and almost dying. I feel like I should be told,” He continued.
“You’re right,” You agreed, “And I will,”
“Promise,”
“I promise,” You said, “The whole time I was keeping it from you I was fighting the urge not to tell you. After hearing what you said it went away. I’m really going to try to let you in,”
“It’s all I want Y/N. I’m building a life with you and I want is to support you in all areas of it,” He confessed.
“I know. I’m sorry,” You breathed, allowing the pain to close your eyes for just a second.
“You don’t have to be. Us talking honestly like this is the first step, it’s only going to get better,” He smiled.
“Do you forgive me?” You inquired.
“I wasn’t ever mad. I was just disappointed that you wouldn’t let me know,” He explained.
“I promise I will next time,” You whispered.
“Hopefully, there won’t be the next time,” He pointed out, “And I know you will. I know your determined voice.
“Jamie,” You let out.
“Yeah?” He responded.
“Look at me,” You instructed meekly.
He turned to look at you and through your blurring eyes you saw his face change dramatically to shock, “My God Y/N, are you okay?”
You took your head and struggled to keep them open
“What’s wrong?” He questioned, his voice panicked as he sporadically took turns looking at the road and at you.
“It hurts,” You whispered before you eyes gave in and you were plunged into darkness.
You woke up for the second time in less than a week in a bright white hospital room but this time Jamie was by your side. Holding your hand, and just there waiting for you. It made you feel better instantly and you realised that he could only be here for you when you let him in and he knew. You vowed again to yourself to let him know when something went wrong in the future.
“Y/N,’ Jamie breathed in relief as he saw your eyes open.
“Jamie,” You smiled, so glad to hear him.
“Why did you let me go on for so long when you were in that much pain?’ He inquired gently, kissing your hand and holding it tight before resting his head on it.
“We had to talk. Making things right between us was my first priority. I wasn’t going to let any pain stop me from getting back on good terms with you. It would have been much worse if we still avoiding each other,” You explained.
“I wasn’t avoiding you,” He reminded.
“Details,” You chuckled, “So what’s wrong with me?”
“Don’t know yet,” He informed, “Doctor will come back and let us know as soon as he knows. Though my theory is it had something to do with that stab wound of yours,”
“Yeah, must overdone something to it while hiding it from you,” You agreed.
“Well, if that doesn’t teach you a lesson then I don’t know what will,” He teased.
“Hey, I already said I was sorry,” You huffed playfully, “Just wait till we get home. I’m going to tell you every near death experience I’ve had.”
“I don’t know how to respond to that,” He chuckled, “And just so I know when I asked you to tell me when something bad happens next time I didn’t expect it to be so soon,”
“I could be dying Jamie and you’re making fun of me,” You reminded.
“You aren’t dying,” He continued to laugh.
“This is why I didn’t call you the first time,” You commented.
“Okay,” He spluttered continuing to laugh.
“You’re going to feel really bad at my funeral, you know that?” You huffed.
“Calm down,” He insisted, still laughing.
“You calm down,” You said, “You’re embarrassing. Pull yourself together,”
“I’m sorry okay,” He apologised, composing yourself, “How are you feeling?”
“Like I’m going to throw up,” You admitted, laying back, “Been feeling this way for days. I did throw up a couple times too. I’m just so tired all the time and I can’t eat anything because I’m so dizzy and nauseous so I’m starving. It’s probably because I’ve basically been lying down for a couple days and I’m just readjusting,”
“I didn’t know you were feeling this way,” He comforted, “You should have said something,”
“Then I would have had to admit that I had been stabbed,” You reminded.
“True,” He nodded, “See why it’s easier to tell people things,”
“Can you stop rubbing it in?” You sighed, “I got the message. Tell you when I’m to die,”
He went to say something in rebuttal but then the doctor walked in.
“Ahh, you’re up,” He smiled, noticing you.
“I am indeed,” You grinned.
“Any ideas as to what caused her to pass out?” Jamie asked.
“Is it anything life threatening?” You asked hopefully.
“No,” The Doctor dragged out confused.
“Damn,” You commented.
“I’m sorry to disappoint,” The doctor offered confused.
“She’s trying to prove a point,” Jamie clarified.
“Anyway you fainted because of low blood pressure,” He explained.
“That’s so boring,” You commented, annoyed.
“Why is her blood pressure so low?” Jamie asked, ignoring you.
“Well, that’s the good news,” He began to announce.
“There is a complication with my injury. And I need life-saving surgery to correct it,” You suggested hopeful, “Hah! Do you feel bad now?”
“Please stop and please continue,” Jamie said to you and then the doctor respectively.
“The good news is Miss Y/L/N is that you’re pregnant and that’s why your blood pressure is so low,” The doctor confirmed.
“I’m what?” You asked blindsided.
“You’re pregnant,” He repeated, “Around six weeks. Congratulations you’re going to be parents,”
“I’m what?” You repeated once again.
“Pregnant,” He stated, “Blood test confirms it. You’ve probably experiencing other symptoms like…”
“Nausea, morning sickness and fatigue,” Jamie filled in, after a couple of seconds of reeling himself.
“I thought that was because of my injury,” You finally made out.
“That’s not the case. Your wound is healing nicely. All the symptoms you’ve been experiencing are due to the pregnancy,” He clarified.
“Is it okay?” Jamie asked, “She was stabbed after all,”
“The baby seems fine,” He confirmed, “I’ll leave you two alone for a bit,”
And after dropping that bombshell he quickly left and left you and Jamie alone. Well, you guess you weren’t as alone as you thought you were.
“Are you okay?” Jamie asked.
“Are you?” You countered.
“I’m great, godnot even great. I’m fantastic!” He admitted.
“Thank God, you’re happy about this,” You sighed in relief.
“You didn’t think I would be?” He asked.
“Not after the day we’ve had,” You mentioned.
“What happened today was important but not as important as this,” He clarified, breathing heavily and with a massive smile on his face, “Are you happy?”
“I’m shocked,”You confessed truthfully, “But excited. Really excited. Just so shocked and when that passes I’ll be excited. We’re having a baby,”
“We are,” He grinned, grabbing your face and kissing you, “We’re having a baby,”
“And a super awesome baby that can survive being stabbed at that,” You added.
“You’re ridiculous,” He chuckled, resting his forehead on yours.
“But you love me,” You teased.
“I do,” He agreed helplessly, filled with glee, “I love the both of you,”
#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#svu#svu imagine#bluebloodsxSVU#SVUxbluebloods#Jamie Reagan#jamie reagan imagine#officer jamie reagan#officer jamie reagan imagine#Danny Reagan#sonny carisi#Sonny Carisi is coming up#imagine#svubloods#SVU fanfiction#blue bloods fandom
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Imagine a killer date night with Jamie
(A/N: To the Anon and everyone else who wanted the second part to the ‘Criminallly good date night with Jamie imagine’. Hope you enjoy and sorry it took so long for me to post. I’m a crappy a blog runner especially when I’m a combination of tried and busy. I’m sorry if this is terrible)
Part One: HERE
Imagine a killer date night with Jamie
“This is it, isn't it?” You questioned, getting out the car and surveying your surroundings.
“This is what?” Jamie countered, getting out himself and looking over at you from his side of the car.
“This is where you murder me,” You clarified, “I’ll admit it well thought out. It’s quiet, secluded dense. It’s the evening so there are fewer people that could be possible witnesses to your crime. Take me far enough no one will hear me. And I’m working on the assumption that even though you plan on ending my life that you still care for me a little and that is why you decided to do it here, out of all places. Because you know that I have a deep emotional connection to this park,”
“Are you done?” Jamie sighed, though still amused.
“Doing what?” You inquired.
“Your speech about how you think I’m going to murder you,” He informed.
“You act like I make it often,” You stated.
“You do,” He reaffirmed.
“Well, it is likely,” You commented.
“No, it’s not,” He argued, rather adamantly.
“If I had been dating me for officially thirteen years tomorrow, I would,” You chuckled.
“Well, I guess I like you too much,” He winked.
“Or you're tricking me,” You insinuated, raising your eyebrows at him.
“Can we start the date now?” He sighed, shaking his head you exasperated but yet again still amused.
“Sure,” You shrugged casually, circling the car so you were perching on the hood of the car, “But just know that I have my eyes on you,”
“I’d be upset if you didn’t,” He smiled, moving so he was sitting next to you.
“Alright,” You gave in, “I’m done teasing. Proceed with your date Officer Reagan,”
“Thank you,” He nodded, “Well, what do you think?”
“You know I love it here,” You commented, “I’m just wondering why we are here?”
“Well, I thought that my redemption date I’d take you somewhere I knew you would like,” He explained.
“It’s not a redemption date it was just your turn to organise plus it’s also doubling as our thirteenth anniversary date,” You reminded, leaning on his shoulder as you looked up again.
“Which is why I took you here, your favourite place in the world,” He announced, with a hand gesture.
“That’s where you are wrong,” You smiled, looking up at him, “My favourite place is wherever you are,”
“Look who's being cheesy now,” He smirked, before kissing you briefly.
“But this is a close second,” You confirmed.
You took a deep breath and soaked in the surroundings. You were at your favourite park in the whole city. Well, it was technically a park but it was more like a forest. A popular hiking trail and your favourite place in the city. It might sound strange and most likely pretentious but when you first moved to New York fourteen years ago. You were lost, you parents essentially absentee and your first good memory here was going with your Housekeepers family to the forest for their annual family hike. It was the first time you felt connected to people and it is what you accredit finally allowing yourself to open up to other people. Without it, you may never have let yourself get to know Jamie.
You would have missed out on the best thing that ever had happened to you.
And that’s why you loved this place so much. You loved just sitting and watching everything go by, walking up the trail and taking it all in. Even just exploring, the place was so big that you hadn’t come anywhere near exploring all of it despite your frequent trips, most of them with Jamie.
“So what do you have planned for our date?” You inquired.
“Well, I thought we could take a hike up to that point that you like and then…” He explained before jumping off the hood and heading to the trunk, opening it up and lifting out, “A picnic under the stars,”
“How romantic,” You chuckled, “Where’d you buy the food?”
“I made it,” He informed.
“Really?” You questioned, sceptically.
“Well, after our disaster couples cooking date. I took cooking classes by myself and have become pretty good at it. And also not so surprised when you weren’t there, there was no crime ring to take down,” He teased.
“I’ll believe it when I taste it,” You mentioned.
“I would expect nothing less,” He chuckled, before prompting, “Now come on. We have a long hike to your picnic spot,”
“It’s going to be dark when we get there,” You commented as you grabbed each other's hand and started walking down the path.
“That was the plan,” He winked, swinging the basket in his other hand.
“What exactly are your intentions with me tonight Reagan?” You flirted.
“I think you know,” He countered before whispering in your ear, “ Mostly because half of them are your ideas,”
“You really are trying to out due my last date aren’t you?” You teased.
“Trying to,” He admitted, “You’ve made it difficult,”
“Not up, for the challenge Reagan?” You smirked.
“Oh, I definitely am,” He confirmed.
After the last date Jamie had organised had descended into a crime-solving mess, you had spent the rest of the night at home eating take-out from one of the Reagan families favourite places. He spent the whole night ranting and vowing that when his turn came around again that he would make sure that it went perfectly.
Before he had the chance to redeem himself, even though you continuously told him that he didn't need to because you had had fun fighting crime with him but you understood his wish to have at least one crime and punishment free date with you. But back to the point before he could organise his ‘redemption’ date, you had to organise your date for him as it was your turn to organise a date.
Last month both you and Jamie had some scheduled time off so you decided that for your date you would go on vacation. Jamie loved driving, especially for long distance so you organised a road trip across a couple of states in a rental car, staying a different hotel and doing different things in the little towns you stopped at for a couple of days before flying back. Jamie loved it but was annoyed by the end that your dates or plans for him always seemed to go off without hitch but his for you would attract the craziest of stuff. Regardless, Jamie had to admit that he enjoyed the go-karting, paintballing and even the painting lesson you did, during which he revealed to be quite a talented artist.
“God, I forgot how long that walk is,” You shuddered as you finally arrived at your destination and slightly ahead to the middle of it.
Which was a small hidden clearing that you can only find if you go slightly off the path? It was a perfect circle so when you looked up it was like looking up at the sky through a larger eye. Plus from this high up, every night is a starry night. It was like its own little world. Surrounded by tall trees, it was a very private spot. Probably best for whatever Jamie had in mind.
“But definitely worth it,” He smiled, catching you up and setting the heavy basket on the ground.
“For the sentimental value, it has?” You inquired.
“That and for that view,” He confirmed before gesturing to the sky.
It was sunset at this point. It was still a bit early so the sky descended from blue, white and yellow as the sun began to set. And from your high position it was breathtaking, with only a few clouds in the sky the colours were even brighter than you had ever seen before. It was absolutely perfect and you were surrounded by pure mother earth.
“Wow,” You breathed, not taking your eyes off the sky.
“Pretty good day to be up here,” Jamie commented, as he began.
“It’s perfect,” You nodded, “Thank you,”
“Don’t thank me just yet,” He teased.
“It's getting better?” You questioned intrigued, pulling your eyes away and watching him as he set out a picnic blanket and started unpacking the food.
“Oh yes it does,” He grinned, on his knees in front of you as he started placing food on the blanket before pulling out a box and opening the lid so you could say, “Can you say strawberries covered in white chocolate?”
Around twenty minutes later you and Jamie were lying on the blanket. Your feet at opposite sides so you met up in the middle. You both snacked aimlessly, feeding each other occasionally, as you discussed meaningless to the most important topics in your lives. The cooking lessons Jamie had been attending were definitely paying off. Everything tasted amazing and you could Jamie was very pleased with himself whenever you liked something he had made, which in this case was everything that he made.
“Oh my God,” You sighed dramatically as you finally got to taste one of those chocolate covered strawberries.
You were flat on your back, looking up to the sky while Jamie was at your side, leaning over you and propped up slightly so he could feed you the strawberry.
“Do you like it?” He asked.
“Of course,” You nodded, jumping up to take a moving bite as he was hoovering it absent-mindedly over your face but a few inches too high as he spoke.
“Well, you better! I went all the way to Brooklyn to get your favourite chocolate,” He mentioned.
“You’re amazing you know that?” You commented, looking up at him over the sky.
No sky could beat his face, to you at least.
“All I did was melt some chocolate,” He reminded, chuckling.
“No, I meant just in general,” You clarified, “Everything you do is so great. You’re just so great at everything. It’s one of the best and most annoying things about you,”
“You find it annoying?” He questioned, curious.
“Rarely, I just get jealous that you’re just so good at everything straight away. Like, take cooking for example. Last month the best you could stir up with a cold linguine and now you stirred up a literal stir fry. My favourite thing in the whole world, rivalling the one I get from my favourite place,” You explained.
“You liked it!” He smiled.
“I loved it,” You reassured, reaching up to stroke his cheek, “It was amazing just like you,”
“Maybe I pick things up quickly,” He gave in, “But not really good at anything while you are. Sure, I’m good at a lot of stuff but you’re really good at certain things,”
“Like what?” You entertained in disbelief.
“You’re one of the best detectives out of all the detectives of heard of, seen and or worked with,” He offered, “You just have a natural born knack for all the skills you need to be a great cop. Your smart, brave, intuitive, analytical and adaptable,”
“Adaptable?” You questioned.
“I meant adaptable in a way that you change our approach depending on the situation you find yourself in or the people your within said situation,” He clarified.
“Oh,” You nodded, “I guess,”
“I hate that,” Jamie sighed.
“What?” You demanded.
“I hate it that you can never accept any of my compliments,” He informed, “It's like you don’t believe it,”
“Well, it would be pretty conceded if I just agreed with you,” You commented.
“Then you deflect with a sarcastic and or generally depreciating comment,” He observed and added.
“Compliments make me feel awkward,” You confessed.
“I know but everything I say is the truth and you need to start believing it,” He said, stroking your cheek with his thumb as he leant over you, blocking any view of the sky behind him.
“Then you need start accepting my compliments when I say them to you,” You insisted.
“I do,” He countered, “I completely agree that I’m intelligent, handsome, daring and great at everything,”
“Now you sound like me,” You giggled.
“Did it sound arrogant?” He teased to which you responded by hitting him playfully, “I’m sorry. I’m just joking,”
“I think we both know that I’m the funny one in this relationship,” You commented, patting his arm sympathetically.
“Funny looking,” He quipped.
“Wow,” You breathed, “It’s like we’ve been transported back into the seventh grade,”
“Seriously though,” Jamie started seriously, “I need you to think that your as incredible as I do,”
“I’ll try,” You reassured.
“That’s all I ask.” He grinned, “So what do think of the date so far?”
“So far?” You questioned, “There's more?”
“Of course there is,” He grinned kissing you before standing up and then helping you up as well.
“Jamie this is too much,” You sighed still holding his hand with one hand and dusting yourself off.
“What do you mean too much? ” He asked, pulling you close, wrapping his arms around your neck and bending his knees slightly so he was at eye level with you, “This time last month you spent the morning playing football and then the whole afternoon watching a football game. It's the least I can do,”
“Buts that's because it was your date,” You argued.
“And today is yours,” He countered as if it was obvious.
“But it's not just my date,” You reminded, “It's our anniversary date too,”
“I know, which is why because I knew you would insist on it. Little perks for myself,” He reassured.
“It's not underwear again is it?” You shuddered.
“Do you think that little of me?” He questioned.
You shrugged teasingly.
“No, it's not underwear,” He chuckled, “It's even better,”
He bent down carefully, so not to drag you down with him, and pulled a portable stereo from out of the basket. Swiftly he plugged his phone in and the speakers crackled slightly to indicate the connection.
“What's going…,” You went to ask only to be interrupted as Jamie put a finger to his lips silently.
He continued to hold your hand as he places the stereo on a nearby tree stump. He pressed a button and music you began to swell. You recognised it immediately.
“Jamie,” You sighed, shaking your head as he kissed your hand.
It was your song.
“Care to dance?” He asked, pulling you closer.
“You’re insane,” You commented but you moved your hands to correct the position so you could slow dance.
“I know what you want me to say,” He chuckled, “And I’m not falling it for this time,”
“Go on,” You teased before prompting him, “Say it,”
“For you?” He questioned.
“For me,” You grinned cheekily.
“Okay,” He obliged, suddenly spinning you around and dipping you, in time perfectly with the song, “I’m only crazy about you,”
“Aww,” You squealed, as he pulled you back up again and you began to dance again.
“Why do you like that so much?”He inquired, tucking some of your flyaway hairs behind your ear.
“It’s just reassurance that you feel as crazy about me as I do about you,” You confessed.
“You don’t think I’m crazy about you?” He countered.
“Well, I know you like me…” You began to say.
“I love you,” He corrected.
“Hell, you’re crazy about me,” You agreed before continuing as you placed your chin on his shoulder as you began to sway, “But sometimes I fell like I have stronger feelings for you than you do for me,”
“Now, you just sound crazy,” He reassured, “Y/N from the second I met you I’ve been in love with you. Hell, I’ve always been crazy about you and I still am. Alway will be,”
“I know,” You said.
“Then why do you need reassurance?” He pondered.
“Because I don’t always believe it,” You admitted.
“I’m not going to leave you,” He reassured once again.
“I know,” You repeated kissing his cheek before resting on his shoulder again and looking at the forest that surrounded you.
He whispered that he loved you and kissed the side of your head. You returned that favour but you kissed him properly. You both swayed as the music continued the play. Progressing from your song to others that you both loved. You were in blissful silence. It was almost perfect except for the fact that Jamie seemed a little tense like he was nervous or something. Every time you went to go see if he was okay he would kiss you and that was enough. Also though the music was on, you could still hear all the hustle and bustle of the forest. The bugs, the birds, and the leaves rustling in the wind, but there was something else as well. An irregularity, every once in a while you could hear it.
It was coming from behind you so you tactfully got Jamie to turn around so you were facing said direction. Your eyes had been closed and when you opened them you could have sworn that you saw a shadow go by. The shock of it caused you to misstep and step on Jamie’s foot.
“Y/N,” He sputtered, swallowing back the pain.
“Sorry,” You apologised quickly, “I got distracted,”
“Care to explain the reason as to why?” He inquired, as you began dancing again.
“I was just thinking,” You offered, shaking what you had thought you’d seen off.
“About?” He asked.
“You…us,” You offered.
“What about us or me even?” He probed further.
“I was just thinking about our future,” You said, which wasn’t a lie because you had.
“Really?” He grinned.
“Yeah, I was thinking about if we would still dance like this when we’re fifty or something,” You informed.
“You know how much I like dancing, of course, we will,” He insisted.
“You are surprisingly good at it,” You commented.
“What can I say? Dancing class pays off,” He chuckled.
“Still can’t believe your mom sent you to that,” You giggled.
“And I’ll never forget,” He sighed, “Danny and Joe never let me forget,”
You continued to laugh as you both descended into fits of it. Your eyes connected and he started kissing you. It was intense over brief like all the other kisses you had had tonight. You continued to hear the irregular sound but you were caught up. Jamie continued to kiss you and it didn’t seem like he was stopping. His hands were at your waist and yours were around his neck. He was applying much more force than you were. Your back was bending much back as he continued to press himself against you.
“Jamie,” You breathed, pulling away.
“Shh,” He whispered, grabbing hold of your hands and pulling you down gently.
You found yourself lying on the back on the blanket and then Jamie got on top of you. You could feel yourself blushing like it was the first time, even though you had done this so many times before. You still got butterflies when he told you he loved you, or when you made out or even when he called you beautiful.
You probably would have been as into it as Jamie clearly was if you didn’t keep hearing the unusual rustling coming from the bushes. You tried to ignore it, listening to the music instead but it was getting louder and you honestly couldn’t understand how Jamie couldn’t hear it.
“Can you hear that?” You asked, pulling away and leaning up to your elbows.
“No,” He said, catching his breath.
“Seriously?” You questioned, looking around as much you could.
“It’s probably just a squirrel,” He suggested, before leaning in again to make out.
You participated, trying to believe that he was right. But just in case you weren’t. You made the both of you roll over so know you were lying on top of him. Tucking your hair behind your ear, you kissed him this time. You know he liked it when you were on top. Your kisses began trailing down his jawline and his neck in an attempt to focus on what was important.
Jamie.
“I think we need to stop,” Jamie said, breaking away.
“We are alone,” You reminded, with a wink.
“You were always the smart one,” He agreed, sitting up and wrapping his arms around you so you were basically sitting on his lap.
“Says the one that went to Harvard,” You teased.
“Details,” He played off before kissing you for the umpteenth time.
Jamie had a habit of kissing you whenever he was nervous or avoiding or even hiding something from you. His way of keeping you occupied and possibly he found it comforting. But your mind was so pre-occupied with this mysterious rustling you kept hearing that you didn’t even have time to even process it.
The noise was getting louder and you couldn’t ignore it and then it suddenly stopped. Your eyes were closed so you opened them and what you saw was a man watching the two of you from the edge of the clearing. As soon as you spotted him you stopped and as soon as he spotted that you had noticed him, he started taking off in the opposite direction.
From that moment you were out of girlfriend mode and into cop mode. You basically and practically jumped off Jamie and took off running after the mysterious man, just knowing that something was wrong. Your hand flew to your holster and piece. Jamie shouted after you but you knew he was running right behind you. You caught a couple of glimpses of the running man but he went around a bend and you lost him.
You stopped to catch your breath, knowing he was gone and there was no chance of you catching up with him. Jamie skidded up next to you after a couple of seconds.
“Y/N, what the hell?” He panting.
But you didn’t answer.
“Is that…?” You pointed out, gesturing a couple of feet to where you both were.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Jamie commented instinctively without thinking.
“That’s a dead body isn’t it,” You sighed.
“Of course it is,” Jamie sighed exasperatedly.
From there, things went into high speed. You stayed with the body while Jamie went and got help as there wasn’t any signal. A bunch of park rangers soon came up and you could tell that they had no idea what to do. The park you were at was hardly a crime hotspot, it was more like a Nanny hotspot. You identified yourself as a Detective and suggested calling the nearest police department only to find that their homicide squad had gone to training weekend and their night squad was definitely not qualified to handle this type of investigation. Especially when the Rangers came back to you and told you that one of the cameras on one of the five entrances to get here had caught a man that matched the one you had described bringing in a bag, big enough for a body the previous night.
You contacted the neighbouring police force but roadworks meant it would take them hours to get here, especially at this time with all the weekend traffic. It became slowly evident that you were going to have to handle this until someone within the jurisdiction could assume responsibility. Things got even more pressing once it was discovered that it had been made clear that your man hadn’t left the area was most likely to still be in the park.
Once you received permission to run the operation to smoke your suspect out, you got to work. You called all the uniforms that could run to the park from the local precinct as well as the park rangers. Your own squad back at SVU were attempting to get here to assist. Everyone was designated an area, the park was put on lockdown to prevent escape. Despite the limited numbers you put everyone into pairs as judging from the state your victim was left in, it was clear whoever you were dealing with was violent.
Around an hour after discovering the body, you and Jamie found yourselves armed with flashlights trekking through the forest. You knew this place like the back of your hand so you took the lead, not to mention the fact that you were technically the senior officer out of the two of you.
“I’m sorry J,” You said, breaking the silence.
“Why are you apologising?” He countered, “It’s not like you killed the guy,”
“I meant I’m sorry for ruining your date…again,” You clarified.
“You didn’t ruin it,” He reminded, “All these criminals we always seem to stumble on to do,”
“Well, then I’m sorry for always attracting them to our dates or everything I like attracting them,” You corrected, “Either way I’m sorry,”
“I can’t be angry at you for being a great detective,” He commented, “I’d be pissed all the time if I did that,”
“Then why are you angry?” You inquired, sensing that something was wrong, he had been tense before and now he seemed much more bothered by this whole situation that you would have anticipated him to be, “Why is all this bothering you so much?”
“It's just…just that…” He struggled before offering, “Tonight wasn’t supposed to go like this,”
“I would hope not,” You tried to lighten.
“It’s just that we should be doing something completely different, right now not hunting down a killer in the middle of the night!” He exclaimed, even more, bothered than you had originally thought.
“Like doing it?” You winked.
“I would have hoped so,” He continued, so wound up that he didn’t even process what he was saying.
“Jamie I know this isn’t how you wanted tonight to go…” You began.
“You can say that again,” He muttered, restlessly as he kicked at some twigs on the ground.
“But we can raincheck and resume all of this some other time,” You suggested, continuing.
“And what take down a drug cartel next?” He huffed.
“Jamie,” You scolded, “What’s going on with you?”
“I just want one of my dates to go off without a criminally related hitch,” He sighed.
“The first one did,” You reminded.
“Not really,” He said.
You tossed him a confused look.
“That restaurant we went to totally ripped me off. It was basically theft,” He gave in and played along.
“Think of it this way,” You began to suggest, “At least we’re spending time together,”
“I guess it’s better than nothing,” He agreed, “I just wish it wasn’t so cold, damp and dark,”
“It’s not too bad,” You offered, “It’s sort of romantic,”
“Late night trudging through the mud, what else could be more romantic?” He countered, sarcastically.
“If we were doing it naked,” You nodded, trying to be serious for comedic effect.
“I like the way you think,” Jamie chuckled, finally lightening up a little.
“I know,” You giggled before prompting, “Come on, the quicker we catch this guy the quicker we can go home and sleep,”
“Now that’s romantic,” Jamie joked before a sudden noise up ahead silenced the two of you.
You motioned to switch your flashlights off as not to draw attention to yourselves. You put your finger to your lips and crept forward. You saw in the distance and moonlight, your suspect pacing and crying as he ranted about what seemly to be the crime he just committed. This guy was clearly unstable and taking him down would be a task as he was clearly erratic and you assume armed. You turned around and summed Jamie closer. He quickly obliged and peered over, seeing what just had.
“What do you want to do?” He whispered as you both took a step back.
“You stay here, I’m going to go talk to him,” You replied in a smilier hushed tone as you shifted you let back so your holster was behind it.
“What?” He hissed.
“Shh,” You hushed, before taking a step forward and gesturing for him to get out of sight.
You crept forward and you kept taking quiet steps towards him.
“Hi there,” You said casually, taking steps down towards him.
You didn’t really have a plan going in. You just decided to do what you always did, be bold and overconfident to a point that no one could question your idea. It was going well enough, he was still pointing a sharp bloodied butcher's knife at you but you tried to make him trust you enough to lower it.
You don’t really know what happened but you assume that either one of the park rangers or uniforms had stumbled upon Jamie and had accidentally snapped a twig on the ground because your guy got all jumpy as soon as he heard a noise.
He accused of you tricking him and got jumpy. He came after you with the knife and dodged it quickly but he came after you again with surprising speed.
“Y/N,” You heard Jamie shout as he jumped the little dip towards you both.
Your suspect suddenly grabbed you and held the knife to your throat as Jamie and a park ranger came into view, levelling their guns at your suspects head and coincidentally yours.
“NYPD!” They both shouted at the both of you.
“Back off,” He demanded.
“Drop the knife,” Jamie countered, his eyes violently going from you to the man holding a knife to your throat.
You could feel the blade pressing into your neck. You closed your eyes as the pain started to hit.
“You don’t want to do this,” You whispered, before reasoning, “If you kill me, they’ll kill you. And if you do that they can’t prove that you didn’t kill Emily,”
Jamie gave you a confused look.
“I didn’t kill her,” He insisted yet again.
“And I’ll help you prove that like I promised,” You offered.
“How?” He demanded, holding you even tighter.
“My boyfriend he’s a lawyer, he went to Harvard and everything,” You admitted truthfully.
“He’ll help?” He softens.
“Not if you kill me,” You reminded.
“Right,” He nodded, his grip loosening and the knife.
“Drop the weapon,” The park ranger repeated again, clearly helpless on what to say from besides from keep the gun levelled at the two of you.
“I was about too!” He shouted, “Why do they keep on shouting at me?”
“I don’t know,” You admitted, shooting the ranger a death stare.
“Everyone is always shouting at me,” He ranted, “Emily was always shouting at me!”
“Is that why killed her?” The ranger questioned.
“Will you shut up Officer?” You snapped, fidgeting.
“Detective…” He went to say.
“Detective?” He questioned, “You’re a cop? You lied to me!”
“No, I…” You began only to be interrupted by the sharp pressing of the knife into your neck.
Enough to draw blood.
That’s when two sharp and precise gunshots went off. You and your hostage taker fell to the ground. You clutched your neck and your suspect howled in pain. He was clutching his knees that had been bleeding profusely. Jamie had shot your suspect in both knees to subdue him. It was only a couple of seconds of realisation before Jamie scooped you up into his arms.
“Are you okay?” He asked gently, holding onto you, his hands on your cheeks as he gave you the once over, wincing at the sight of your neck.
You nodded, attempting to look back as other officers started to swarm.
“No, just keep looking at me,” Jamie insisted, pulling you into him.
“Did you shoot him?” You spluttered.
Jamie nodded this time.
“In the knee?” You continued.
“Both knees,” He added.
“That was pretty hot,” You commented jokingly.
He laughed as you both stood up together and he began leading you towards the main entrance, telling you that their would be an ambulance waiting.
Around twenty minutes later, you were sitting in the back of an ambulance, wrapped in an emergency blanket. You were drinking something warm as by this time it was the middle of the night probably early morning so it was awfully cold.
“Happy Anniversary,” Jamie announced, walking up to the ambulance and taking a seat beside you.
“What?” You questioned.
“It’s officially our anniversary. It’s 1:001:00 ame clarified.
“I completely forgot,” You admitted.
“I wouldn’t expect anything else,” He chuckled.
“I’m sorry Jamie,” You whispered.
“Why are you sorry?” He asked, wrapping an arm around you.
“Because I ruin everything,” You insisted.
“No, you just have something about you that attracts crime solving and criminals,” He teased.
“Next time we’re taking down a drug cartel,” You joked, “Be prepared.”
“I always am when I’m with you,” He winked.
“Do you want to raincheck tonight?” You asked.
“If we do we’ll probably end up taking down that drug cartel,” He laughed.
“I’m sorry,” You said again.
“Y/N, if think that I’ve accepted that when I’m with you anything can happen. You’re an incredible cop and the universe probably sends you these things because it knows you can handle them. If that ranger had kept his mouth shut you probably would have talked him down,” He comforted.
“The universe?” You questioned, skeptically, “You sound like me,”
“I intended too,” Jamie revealed, “My logic can’t explain all of this so I used yours,”
“You’re probably going to have to do that a lot,” You commented.
“I know and I hope that I’ll be able to do it for the rest of my life,” He agreed.
“What do you mean?” You asked.
“This isn’t how I wanted it to happen,” He confessed, “I had planned this whole thing. And everything was perfectly suited to you,”
“How so?”
“Well, it was here for one,your favourite place, your favourite song was playing which is also our song, at your favourite time of day, sunset,” He explained, “I know your favourite number is thirteen and that your favourite day out of the whole year is Christmas eve. So I thought what better day to ask you than the eve of our thirteenth anniversary here with all that other stuff,”
“Ask me what?” You inquired.
“To marry me,” He stated, reaching inside his pocket and pulling out a small box.
“What?” You demanded, so utterly shocked that it was probably a good thing that you were wearing a shock blanket.
“Will you do me the honour of marrying me?” He asked, officially, opening the box the presenting to you his mothers ring,
“Of course I will,” You nodded, tears spilling down your cheeks as he shakily slipped the ring onto your finger.
“I love you so much,” He beamed, as he pulled you close for a hug and a kiss.
“I love you too,” You cried, wiping your tears.
“You didn’t mind me asking here or today do you?” He asked to make sure.
“No, it was perfect,” You reassured, “I promise,”
#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#svu#svu imagine#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#Jamie Reagan#jamie reagan imagine#officer jamie reagan#officer jamie reagan imagine#Reagan#imagine#svubloods
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The People Erika Left Behind MASTERLIST
SERIES SYNOPSIS...
Erika Rosaline Reagan was Commissioner Frank Reagan’s and his wife Mary Reagan’s fourth child and the first Reagan female to join the NYPD. Bright, temperamental, dedicated, Erika was quickly rising through the ranks along with her partner Will Gorski and older brother Danny and twin brother Joe. Unfortunately, her life would be cut short after she was killed unexpectedly on the job. Leaving behind her partner, family and most importantly her three-year-old daughter. Never revealing to anyone her daughter’s paternity, Y/N grew up without knowing both her Father and Mother under the watchful eye of the Reagan brood. Ten years later Y/N is now thirteen. Y/N herself is a smart-witted, courageous, inquisitive genius that attends NYC’s most prestigious schools for the Academically gifted. And though she isn’t socially inept sometimes finds it hard to follow social cues that are incompatible with her pre-existing knowledge. And even though she had lived a very happy yet sheltered life surrounded by a loving family she often struggles with the guilt she feels about wondering what her life would be like if her mother was alive or in particular if she knew who her Father was. Her years of speculation were soon to be over when she met Manhattan’s newest ADA, Rafael Barba also known as her biological Father. A revelation and a court case throws Y/N’s life into a tailspin, where almost everything she knows is a story orchestrated to protect her from the truth. The actual truth is that her Mother left a lot of unresolved secrets as well as people behind...
THE PEOPLE ERIKA LEFT BEHIND [BarbaxDaughter Mini Series]
(All Crossovers)
Part One: Imagine unknowingly meeting your Dad, Rafael Barba, for the first time
Part Two: Imagine unknowingly bonding with you biological father, Rafael Barba
Part Three: Imagine Rafael figuring out that you’re his daughter
Part Four: Imagine finding out Rafael Barba is your Father
Part Five: Imagine your biological father, Rafael Barba, filing for full legal custody of you
Part Six: Imagine finding out how your parents, Rafael and Erika, met
Part Seven: Imagine Barba v Reagan custody trial PART ONE
Part Eight: Imagine a Barba v Reagan custody trial THE INTERLUDE: How We Got Here
Part Nine: Imagine a Barba v Reagan Custody Trial PART TWO: The Aftermath
Part Ten: Imagine a Barba v Reagan Custody Trail Part Three: The Verdict
Part Eleven: Imagine finding out the Truth about your parents, Rafael and Erika
Part Twelve: https://svubloods.tumblr.com/post/187949805956/the-people-erika-left-behind-imagine-looking-into
STATUS: ONGOING
#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#svu#svu imagine#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#SVU fanfiction#rafael barba#rafael barba imagine#ada rafael barba#ada rafael barba imagine#daddybarba#barbaxdaughter#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#Reagan#Frank Reagan#Danny Reagan#Joe Reagan#Erin Reagan#Jamie Reagan#joe reagan imagine#detective joe reagan#detective joe reagan imagine#imagine#svubloods#the people erika left behind
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Imagine finding out how your parents, Rafael and Erika, met (TPELB PART SIX)
(A/N: Hope you enjoy. This may seem like a filler chapter but it lays out the background and themes later on so pay close attention. Sorry, I’m posting here but I was dragging out as I’m getting some of my results tomorrow and I’m too stressed out to sleep)
Masterlist with all the Parts HERE
Imagine finding out how your parents, Rafael and Erika, met
“Y/N?”
“Hmm?” You countered, looking up from your session of staring aimlessly at the surface of your desk.
“Do you have an answer?” Your physics teacher, Mr. Morgan, asked, turning to look at you as he stopped scribbling on the board.
“800,” You breathed, without hesitation as you quickly glanced over the problem, but you were still distracted.
“That's right,” He smiled softly, writing it on the board for the class, “Well done,”
You returned his comforting smile with your own forced one, before looking back at your desk again. You could feel his eyes still lingering on you but you elected to ignore it as it wasn't like him to select someone to ask a question twice in a row. So you knew that you didn’t have to pay attention anymore not that you often had to pay attention to his explanations of concepts but usually you enjoyed it, just not recently.
The class was over in around ten minutes, signaling the end of class, but that ten minutes seemed to go much slower for you. The bell rang and everyone got up to head to their next lesson which for you was Music, you had a showcase coming up and all your lessons were dedicated to preparing for it.
“Alright, I’ll see you guys tomorrow,” Mr. Morgan waved off before everyone started to file out of the room.
You got up yourself, your friend waiting for you patiently. You turned to follow her when you were stopped.
“Y/N, do you mind staying back for a few minutes?” Mr. Morgan asked suddenly, appearing close behind you.
You raised your eyebrows at your friend who smirked as you trend around.
“Sure,” You agreed, “I’ll catch you up,”
“I’ll let Mr. McNamara know,” She added before heading out the room.
“Thank you,” Mr. Morgan called after her as you took a seat in the desk closet to his desk.
Mr Morgan was arguably your favourite teacher, mostly because he was your Physics teacher but also because he was a very good physics teacher. He had joined the school as a teacher around three years ago straight out of MIT, your dream school. He also did Mechanical Engineering there just like you, he even took a semester abroad and completed part of his degree at Cambridge. He joined this school because a large portion of graduates here attended institutions on par with MIT, plus it was an impressive start to his teaching degree, not a lot of graduates taught here right out of school. He had basically done everything you wanted to when you reached eighteen expect you had no interest in teaching but research and innovation. You only knew all this about him because your mutual love of mechanical engineering meant he took a special interest in you and you grew quite close in three years since he had started teaching you.
It’s funny actually because originally you thought you wouldn’t like him. The first lesson you had, you corrected him around three times. You assumed that he was just incompetent and that school had lowered the standards of their new hires but you later found out it was simply because he was nervous. You gave him a chance after the second lesson after hearing that he was an MIT graduate unable to believe that your beloved institute would produce such a subpar graduate. And you were right in doing so. He was an amazing teacher, one of the best you’d ever had and it was because he loved it as much you did. He quickly realised that you weren’t like the others in your class. Like you said you loved it all as much as he did. He took an interest and decided how far you could go. After getting through all the material set for the year in around a month, he kept progressing you. He’d often just give you college lesson problems to solve during class while he taught everyone else.
Knowing that you would probably and hopefully head to MIT yourself, he enjoyed talking to you about latest developments in the field and going through problems with you. You attended the Physics club that he ran and always stayed back so you could work on some problems for his former classmates that were still at MIT doing their masters. A couple of months ago he invited you and your Uncle Joe to go down for a couple weeks and meet some of the professors and sit in a couple lectures. It was one of the best experiences in your life and your sure your Uncle Joe’s most confusing.
So I guess you could say you were friends, as much as a student and a teacher can be.
You rarely discussed personal matters but he knew your situation and he talked about himself as well. He had a crush on your English teacher but he didn’t think you knew that. You also often discussed or mocked how almost every female student in the school envied your friendship as they all had a crush on him.
“So?” You prompted, as he sat down at his desk from shutting the door.
“How are you feeling?” He inquired.
“Annoyed,” You confessed truthfully.
“Why?” He asked.
“I should be in music right now,” You reminded.
“Y/N…” He sighed, spinning in his chair dramatically at you.
“It’s true,” You pointed out.
“How long is it until the trial?” He questioned gently.
“A month tomorrow,” You informed, emotionless.
“How long has it been now then…?” He inquired, continuing his gentle streak.
“Four weeks, three days, fifteen hours,” You informed.
“No minutes?” He teased.
“I can’t be bothered to count,” You confessed.
“This is really getting to you isn’t it?” He commented.
“How can it not?” You countered.
“Well, you haven’t been acting like yourself.” He pointed out.
“How so?” You entertained.
“It’s subtle stuff, really,” He observed, “You’re still doing amazingly in your all classes which you wouldn’t expect from a student going through what you’re going through but then again it’s you and not just any other student. You’re just not yourself. You don’t make faces at me when I teach to try and throw me off and you don’t do our whistle to let me know when you’ve finished whatever problem I’ve given you. Little things like you aren’t smiling like you used to.”
“There isn’t a lot to smile about lately,” You sighed sadly.
“You haven’t said much about it,” He mentioned.
“Everything you need to know was in that meeting you all had about me,” You responded all-knowingly, as you mentioned the meeting that all your teachers had had with the principle about your situation once the principal had been informed of your current situation.
“You know about that?” He asked, surprised.
“Jones let it slip when he said he was sorry about for the loss of my mother. I’m assuming they weren’t particularly clear on that side of the details. Because after I told him that she had been dead for ten years he needed to tell me something to make things better and less awkward.” You informed.
“He can never keep quiet that one,” He commented.
“He was just trying to be nice,” You defended.
“Do you want to talk about it?” He inquired.
“No,” You stated, “I know I’ve been pretty off lately but I’ve been trying to act normal, particularly here. It’s really my only escape from it all and most of the time it works and I can but some days I can’t shake that cloud that hangs over me, you know?”
“How about after we finish this conversation we go back to how we were before all this?” He suggested.
“I’d like that,” You nodded.
“Okay, then that’s what we’ll do,” He agreed, “But first I have to make sure you’re okay to make myself feel better. I’m really worried about you.”
“Then continue with your completely selfless intentions,” You teased, sarcastically.
“You’re acting more like yourself already,” He chuckled, before beginning, “How is everything with the living situation?”
“Good,” You admitted, “Everything would be having a much worse impact on me if I wasn’t with Will. He tries to make me forget about everything by keeping me busy and stuff and it works. I usually thunk about everything when I’m alone, like at night.”
“Are you sleeping?” He asked.
You shook your head.
“Are you talking to someone about all this?” He inquired.
“I have a therapist,” You informed.
“You do?” He questioned.
“Court-appointed.” You nodded, “Another one of the magical things you have to do when apart of a bitter custody battle,”
“Well, that’s good,” He nodded, in return, “Do you like them?”
“She’s nice enough,” You replied, “Good at what she does, told her more than I thought I would,”
“She can’t help you if you don’t tell her what’s going on,” He reminded.
“You sound like Will,” You commented, rolling you eyes.
“It’s true Y/N,” He insisted, “Her job is to help you,”
“Her job is to determine the impact of not knowing either of my parents my whole life has had on me and whether my Grandparents did an adequate enough job of managing that impact and generally just raising me,” You clarified.
“Was the therapist your Father’s idea?”He inquired.
You nodded.
“I’m sure she is neutral,” He insisted yet again.
“She is,” You confirmed, “But the fact I have to see her is a common tactic with Father’s wanted to show that they care about their children’s mental wellbeing. I read up about it,”
“All this makes what I know make more sense,” He nodded.
“What are you talking about?” You asked, confused.
“Miss Norden asked me to give this to you,” He explained, “She said that she doesn’t think that you weren’t meant to give it to her,”
You reached over and took it, just looking at the first sentence made you realize what it was and how you had made a mistake.
“I must have given her the wrong letter,” You sighed, looking through your bag and pulling out the correct one and handing it to him.
“Chien-Shiung Wu,” He nodded in approval, as his eyes scanned over your actual assignment, “Nice pick,”
“Well, the assignment was to write a letter to a dead person whose had an impact on you,” You reminded, “Quite childish if you ask me, but I love writing letters,”
“You do?” He questioned.
“It’s a dying art,” You insisted.
“So the first one was…” He leads on.
“Last week my therapist asked me if I could say anything to my Mom what would I say. I said I didn’t know so she said to jot down some ideas and bring it to the next session. I was inspired by the assignment and wrote a letter. I must have handed in the wrong one,” You said, offering an explanation.
“That makes sense,” He smiled, comfortingly, “I’ll tell you she was worried that her assignment may have upset you or made things worse.,”
“How did you even get this?” You inquired, “Miss Norden has been off all week the flu and you should tell her not to worry,”
“I went to go see her,” He mentioned.
“Can you just tell her you like her already?” You sighed playfully, “This whole ordeal you two have sucked me into is giving me Ross and Rachel flashbacks.”
“You’re a Friends fan?” He inquired, skeptically.
You nodded in confirmation, “Me and Grandpa like watching it,”
“You’re Grandpa, the Commissioner, is a Friends fan?” He continued to question, surprised.
“I personally think he only watches because he has a small crush on Monica,” You confessed.
“He is her type,” He chuckled.
“Is that all?” You inquired, with a slightly happier smile than you had when you started, “I need to get to class,”
“Just one more thing,” He announced.
“Okay,” You prompted.
“What you wrote is it true?” He whispered.
You nodded.
“Promise me you’ll talk to your therapist about it,” He asked.
“I will as long as you give my new assignment to Miss Norden and you both promise not to talk about it,” You insisted.
“You have our word,” He guaranteed.
“I’m sure I do,” You winked, getting up.
“We’re only friends,” He insisted, getting up as well to see you off.
“Sure,” You agreed unconvinced as you both headed for the door, “Just like Ross and Rachel, Monica and Chandler…”
“Off you go,” He hurried, flustered.
You chuckled as you headed down the now empty corridor towards the music room. Clutching the letter he had given back to you close to your chest. You contemplated tearing it up and throwing it away in one of the many trash cans you walked past but you decided to half honor your promise and shoved it into your bag. You’d keep it but whether or not you would talk about was another story. Your next appointment was that afternoon so you would have to make up our mind sooner rather than later.
As you slipped into music, you were acknowledged briefly by your teacher before he started organising the next performance for rehearsal. One you weren’t apart of, so you got to just sit and watch. It was the performance of yours, you had missed your one rehearsal, it was the last one in show and involved a tiro of girls from a few years above you. The piano was a big part of their performance as one of them was an avid player who had her eyes set on Juilliard so it was always enjoyable to observe.
That night after school and after therapy for that matter. You were sitting at Will’s kitchen island doing homework as he attempted to make you dinner. He wasn’t much of a chef so it was a lot of work for him to suddenly have to cater for someone else. He used to just order takeout for himself every day basically but you couldn’t do that when you had a kid.
“Ah, I give up!” He sighed, throwing his arms up, the saucepan still clutched in his hand.
“Do you want to order Chinese or pizza?” You inquired, not looking up.
“We can’t have any more takeout,” He cried undecided, “You need to eat actual food,”
“So you don’t want me to call?” You questioned, confused.
“No,” He stated adamantly, clearly making up his mind, “I’m going to cook…something,”
“How about pasta?” You suggested.
“Simple enough,” He nodded.
“And we can just eat it with ketchup so you don’t have to make any sauce,” You added, as you closed your book.
“It’s moments like these I understand why they all call you a genius,” He commented, pulling out a saucepan and putting on the gas.
“An hour ago I did your taxes in under fifteen minutes,” You reminded, unimpressed.
“And I appreciate it and you,” He countered.
“But not enough to learn how to cook food that would help constitute a healthy diet,” You smirked still unimpressed, rolling your eyes, “You put the pasta in after the water starts boiling,”
“Right,” He agreed, stopping the pasta he was about to pour in from going in before saying, “It’s nice to see you smiling and making jokes again,”
“I was smirking nor smiling,” You clarified, still smirking.
“Same difference,” He sighed, shaking his head at you, “It’s nice to see you being like your old self,”
“Are you suggesting that I haven’t been acting like myself?” You demanded, with mock offense, not taking the matter seriously.
“You’ve been a watered down version of yourself which is understandable given the circumstance,” He clarified this time.
“That’s a nice way to put it,” You complimented.
“Y/N, your teacher called,” He informed.
“And he’s worried about me?” You offered.
“He said for the most part you’re handling it extremely well but he’s still worried that you’re not dealing with it all,” He explained. “Talk to me Y/N,”
“I’ve accepted what’s going on if that’s what you mean,” You began, with a heavy sigh, “I don’t agree with everything that has happened and i know what I want. But I know that it may not happen. I just hate not knowing what is going to happen. I miss knowing what’s going to happen and the certainty of it all. I don’t know what my life is going to be like a couple months from now. And it makes me anxious not knowing, uncomfortable. I just want to know what’s going to happen so I can feel comfortable with it. There is so many scenarios that I can’t help but think of all of them constantly. Am I even making sense?”
He nodded encouragingly.
“I miss my routine,” You continued to confess, letting everything out, “Take today for example. I came home to any empty apartment and waited a couple of hours for you to arrive. But usually I would stay at school for a while and my Uncle Joe would pick me up and I’d hang out at the station surrounded by all the people and business. Then I’d come home and me Grandpa would eat dinner together and play card games with the TV in the background before bed. I was always with someone which was something I thought I hated but now I don’t have it. I miss it so much that it hurts in a way I’ve never felt before. It’s in my heart and it doesn’t go away, expect during the visits when I can be with them. It just doesn’t go away. I miss having them around all the time and I’m so scared that I’ll never to get to go back that. That for the rest of my life I’ll have to see them during supervised visits,”
“It won’t always be like this,” Will insisted, coming around to hug you, you were chest level as you were on a seat.
“But what if it is?” You countered, “What if he wins and I won’t get to see them?”
“Y/N, emotions are just running high,” He tried to comfort, “Once there is a decision thing will settle down and something will be arranged. You’ll get the best of worlds, I promise. You’ll get to be with your family as much as you want and you’ll be able to get to know your Father.”
“I don’t know if I want to anymore,” You commented, spitefully.
“Don’t say that Y/N!” He scolded, “I’m almost certain that he has his reasons for the way he acts in regard to all this. Do I agree with them, no, but I can appreciate how hard it must be for him to navigate through all this,”
“He still gets to go wherever he calls home and he can see whoever he wants whenever he wants…” You reminded scornfully.
“Expect for you.” He pointed out.
“What?” You asked.
“The person he wants to see most is you Y/N and that’s the truth. I know it for a fact. He can’t see you whenever he wants. He has the same two supervised visits as your family does. Expect in his case you don’t actually take up on them. You’ve refused to see him for the past month,” He elaborated.
“Why are you defending him,” You demanded.
“I’m not,” He insisted, lowering down so he was eye-level with you in the chair, “I’m staying neutral. Putting your interests first which includes your future interests. And the fact is that is all going to be over soon and I don’t want you to throw away the chance of getting to know your Dad because you don’t agree with how he’s handling things. I’m trying to help you see that this is a hard situation for everyone. I know it’s difficult right now and your hurt but try and remember you’ve always wanted to know who your Dad is. And now you do. You have a chance to get answers to all those questions you wanted to know your whole life,”
“How do you do that?” You questioned.
“What?” He asked.
“Always know when to be serious and what the right thing to say is?” You elaborated.
“Emotional intelligence,” He chuckled, “The only level of intelligence I beat you on,”
“I wish you were my Dad,” You whispered.
“I know. I wish you were my kid too sometimes,” He smiled comfortingly, “But I’m not. He is,”
“Would you do what he’s doing if you were in the same position?” You pressed.
“Honestly, I don’t know. I can’t imagine getting robbed of the chance of seeing my kid growing up,” He responded.
“You think he was robbed of the chance?” You inquired.
“Do you not?” He countered.
“I don’t know what to think,” You confessed, “Does he really want to see me?”
“Of course he does,” Will chuckled, “He wouldn’t be doing all this if he didn’t. Plus I get calls from both him and his lawyer, trying to schedule a meeting with you,”
“You do?” You asked, surprised.
He nodded, “He’s desperate.”
“What do you say?” You asked.
“That you would probably never talk to me again if I said yes for you and surprised you with a meeting. And that until you say you want to it will alway be no,” He explained.
“And he still calls every day?” You continued.
“In case you change your mind,” He explained.
There was a silence.
“Waters done,” You pointed out.
Without a word, he went to put the pasta him. You watched intently and then in turn confused as he stopped once again before putting in the pasta. He turned off the pasta and spilled the water down the sink.
“What are you doing?” You inquired.
“We are going out,” He said, “Come on,”
“I’m in my pajamas,” You pointed out.
“It doesn’t matter,” He insisted, tossing you a jacket.
Though you were hesitant, you eventually followed. And you both set off in his car to whatever mysterious location he had in mind.
“Will?” You asked.
“I’m not telling you where we are…” He went to say once again.
“How do you know it will all work out?” You asked instead, referring to what he said before.
“Because I’m your side. Whatever happens, I’m always going to put your first. I’ll do whatever I can to make it happen and when I set my mind to something it will happen. So I know it will work out because I’ll fight for it until to does. I will always put you first,” He responded.
“Thank you,” You replied.
“What did I say about thank yous?” He sighed.
“Sorry,” You apologized quickly before asking, “So where are we going?”
“You still hate surprises?” He inquired, tactfully.
“I haven’t changed my position in the half hour since we last discuss it, yes,” You commented.
“I know you’ve had a go of it today. With you teacher, your therapist and then me. It’s a lot of things to deal with and a lot of information. So I thought why not juts take you where you want to be the most? My main job is to put your interests first and if that means letting you see your Grandpa three times over two times. Then so be it,” He revealed.
“Really?” You whispered, your eyes tearing up almost instinctively at the thought.
“All you need is a hug and I think mine are loosing effect,” He joked.
“Never,” You grinned.
“And this a one-time thing,” He warned, “And no one can find out about this,”
“I understand,” You nodded.
“I just want you to feel better and being home for a while hopefully will do that,” He smiled.
You soon reached your Grandpa’s house and once you did. You raced out the car and to the front the door. And as soon as your Grandpa opened it, without saying a word, you hugged him and cried. Overwhelmed by it all, by all the emotions and being with him again. Not to mention the whole considering things from Mr. Barba’s perspective thing. But that was a brief thought at that moment because you were home and that was all that mattered. You stayed with your Grandpa throughout the whole visit, not leaving his side or his arms. You need to make up for the lost time.
For the first time in a month, you drifted into a sleep peacefully, so much so that when you woke up you were back at Will’s and you ha don idea how you had gotten back. You were later told that you had fallen asleep while playing Blackjack with everyone after having eaten the homemade dinner that your Great Grandpa Henry had made. He still made extra and still made a plate for you.
You felt much better the next day. You almost felt normal. Later that day, you were in your room. You had heard the buzzer ring a couple minutes earlier but hadn’t reacted as you weren’t allowed to answer it anyway. You heard the door open and then shut again before Will came into your bedroom clutching an envelope.
“Who was it?” You asked casually.
“Ella Hennessy,” He informed.
“Mr. Barba’s lawyer?” You questioned, “What did she want?”
“She wanted to see if you wanted to arrange a meeting with Mr. Barba,” He informed
“What did you say?” You asked.
“No and then she gave me this,” He explained, handing it to you, “It’s for you,”
You took it gingerly and inspected it. You eventually opened it up and pulled out a written letter. Your eyes immediately went to the name at the bottom. It read Rafael Barba.
“What is it?” Will asked this time.
“A letter from Mr. Barba,” You informed, your eyes going back to start in preparation to read it.
“Are you going to read it?” He inquired.
You nodded, “I’ll give it chance,”
“Do you want me to go?” He asked.
“No, stay. I’ll read it out,” You insisted, pulling at his arm so he sat beside you on the bed.
“Okay,” He agreed.
“Dearest Y/N,” You began, “I’d like to start with thanking you for opening this letter and hopefully reading it. I know we aren’t the best terms and I know that’s mostly due to my actions so I appreciate you hearing me out. Even if it’s through letter form but it’s a dying art anyway…”
“Sounds like you,” Will commented.
“I’ll try and keep this short,” You continued, “Because I have so many things I want to say to you and most of them aren’t things that I can express in a letter and things I’d rather tell you in person. But I know this won’t be possible for all things because of the trial. I know my actions aren’t favoring too well with you and I hope one day that you’ll give me the chance to explain myself in person as to why I’m doing this. Just know that all my actions are based on two things, what I think is best for you and trying to make up for all the time we’ve lost. It may be hard to believe now but what I’m doing is for you. For us. For the family, I hope that we can be one day.
It is truly all I want.
On the topic on the trail, I know that you may end up hearing things about me and your Mother that most kids shouldn’t know about their parents and also things that most kids get told not under oath.
So I thought instead of letting you hear the story of how your parents first met in a courtroom in front of everyone. I’d give you the chance to hear it from me. Your actual parent, a thing most kids take for granted.
You may not even want to hear it or you may not care but I want to start making up for all this and giving you something that most kids get. The story of how their parents met. So here’s the abridged version. Maybe one day I’ll tell you the extended version, hopefully in person.
It was around midnight. I had just come back from upstate which was where I was based at the time. It was my first job and I was only a couple of years since I had passed the bar. I was working in the private sector and I hated it but it paid well, which then was my only focus. Trying to make all my hard work worth it by earning money that could have only dreamt of while growing up in the Bronx, which is where I grew up by the way.
I had come to the city to see my Mother, your Grandmother…”
“I didn’t even think about that,” Will confessed.
“What?” You asked.
“The fact that you just don’t have a Father but a whole new family,” He continued.
“Me neither,” You confessed, “This is all so much bigger then when you first think about it,”
“Sorry, for interrupting,” Will apologized, "Please continue,"
“But I quickly got bored and because back then I couldn’t just call any of my friends from the city. They weren’t that sort of person and the ones that didn't like going out in the middle of the night.” You continued to read out-loud, “So I don’t know how but I ended up in Brooklyn and I thought why not go to the piano bar over the usual lawyer or upscale bar that my new profession had thrown me into. I loved the piano, still, do and I like to play it. So I thought why not. There were only a few people there and it was hardly upscale. But that didn’t matter because all I saw was the women playing on the stage.
The light was shining on her as you tapped at the keys effortlessly. I’ll never forget how happy she looked being up there. Like she was born to play and she was born to play on stage. It was mesmerizing and all she had to do was lock eyes with me and flash me that captivating smile during that performance and I was hooked.
Not to mention she was playing my favorite song which I later learned was hers as well. A coincidence you couldn’t deny. Meant to be almost.
I remember thinking how strange it was that someone that beautiful and talented to be playing at a place like that. To say the least I was suspicious and rightfully so upon reflection. But regardless and against my better judgment I walked to the end of the stage so I could be the first person this beuatful talented starnger saw and be the first person to tell her how amazing she was. And I did.
We got to talking and I won’t bore you with the details of everything we talked about but just know from the second I met her I just knew she was special. She just one of those people that you could ever forget and I never did. And of course, especially now never will.
I won’t lie and tell you that we were in love because we weren’t. We never got the chance and if I'm being honest I knew that she wasn’t going to be my forever but I felt that connection. It was instant and pure magic. I just assumed she’d be my biggest ‘what ifs’ and until I met you that’s what she was. That girl I thought about from time to time, that girl whenever did think about her I could feel the electricity I felt when I fist met. She never left me and I know now it’s because a part of me never left her.
You.
I don’t want you to think that you were the product of a one night stand or anything because you weren’t. We went on few dates but we weren’t in love but more of a deep infatuation with each other. We are our way to love. But there were other things going on in her life which meant that we never did. Things that I still don’t know the whole story of but since meeting you I’ve become steps closer.
There are a lot of questions and things that don’t make sense about the brief time we shared which is why I’m not going into detail but I still thought you should know the story of how your parents met. Hopefully, I’ll get to tell you more someday. Perhaps we could figure it all out together because there are some things that still don’t make sense. Not all that I've made clear here. But like I said perhaps we could talk about in person sometime in the future.
But until then,
Yours Truly,
Your Father, Rafael Barba,”
“That was…” Will begin.
“Wow,” You breathed, overwhelmed but in a strange way, a good way.
“What did he mean by all that not making sense stuff,” Will pondered.
“I don’t know,” You said, in what felt like a trance, “But they met in a bar…”
“That was obvious wasn’t it?” Will joked.
“Sure, but here is the confirmation, that is what happened.” You grinned.
“I’ve got to make a call,” Will announced all of sudden, getting up, “Are you okay, can I go for a couple minutes?”
You nodded in reassurance, still looking at the letter, waving him off. He quickly left and you read the letter again. Taking in every word and letting it soak in. You clutched it close to your chest and shut your eyes.
For the first time, you felt close, connected.
You reached under your bed and pulled out a box where you kept everything that was important to you. Most of it was you Mothers, containing all the things that she had given you and left you. And for the first time, you got to put something that your Dad had given you.
A memory.
#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#svu#svu imagine#imagine#rafael barba#rafael barba imagine#ada rafael barba#ada rafael barba imagine#Reagan#Frank Reagan#Jamie Reagan#Danny Reagan#Joe Reagan#the poeple erika left behind#daddybarba#daddy barba imagine#barbaxdaughter#svubloods
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Imagine bonding with Sonny over family
(A/N: For @heypeople2 who requested this piece. Sorry for the long wait and I hope you and everyone else enjoys this. And thank you for requesting Sonny. IT’S BEEN AGES!)
Imagine bonding with Sonny over family
“Is that him?” Your niece Nicky asked as she dropped heavily into the seat next to your desk, looking over her shoulder.
“Well, hello to you too,” You greeted, surprised at her sudden appearance, “Why aren’t you in class?”
“It was canceled,” She informed, looking at you briefly before looking back at your partner Sonny Carisi who was standing at the other end room with Fin.
“And you’re here, why?” You continued to probe, a confused look on your face.
“To see your new partner,” She stated obviously continuing to look.
“He’s been my partner for a year,” You reminded.
“But I just found out about him,” She countered, “And I have theories as to why you hid from us,”
“Do you now?” You entertained.
She nodded, before turning to look at you, a smug look on her face, “You like him, don’t you?”
“Uhh, no,” You stated quickly in a casual tone, maybe too quickly.
“Oh my God, you do!” She squealed, bursting out of her seat.
“Did I not just say that I didn’t?” You questioned, giving her look.
“But you were lying,” She argued.
“I was not!” You fought.
“You’re in love with him aren’t you,” She announced, shocker herself this time.
“Can you be quiet!” You hissed, “And that’s a bit of a big jump, don’t you think?”
“I never seen you like this before,” She breathed, amazed, ignoring you completely.
“Like what?” You demanded, “I’m acting completely normal,”
“You’re blushing for one,” She pointed out, “Is this why you haven’t been doing the rounds recently?”
“What do you mean?” You asked.
“You know how you just hook up with random guys that you meet, keep them for a for weeks and then drop them,” She recalled.
“That’s not exactly how it goes,” You defended quietly and half-heartedly.
“Are you about to get into your first real adult relationship?” She inquired, leaning on her hands and smiling up at you.
“I’ve been in relationships before,” You stated.
“That lasted longer than three months?” She countered.
“Yeah,” You agreed without much effort.
“What was his name?” She inquired, titling her head and looking at with narrowing eyes that mimicked her mothers.
“I don’t remember,” You confessed, flipping your paperwork loudly.
“Exactly,” She exclaimed triumphantly, “I can’t believe you actually like a guy. Like in the normal adult way,”
“That’s a lot of adult talk for a nineteen-year-old,” You quipped.
“I haven’t heard you deny it yet,” She commented, wiggling her eyebrows.
You glanced at Sonny who was still talking. You licked lips and quickly looked down at your work before saying, “I don’t love him,”
“But you really like him, right?” She teased gleefully.
“Will you…” You went to say only to stop when you noticed Sonny approaching the two of you or maybe his desk, either way, he was coming closer.
“Hey Y/N,” He interrupted only to realize that you were withs, someone, “I’m sorry didn’t realize you had any company,”
“Don’t worry about it,” You reassured before, going back to your paperwork, oblivious to the two people continuing to stare at you.
“Aren’t you going to introduce us?” Nicky hissed.
“Right…um…Sonny, this is my Niece Nicky, Nicky this is my partner Dominick Carisi,” You introduced quickly with an accompanying hand gesture.
“Hi,” Nicky smiled shaking his hand.
“Hey,” He returned, shaking hers, “I should have recognized you from the picture and you can call me Sonny by the way,”
“What picture?” She inquired, looking at the both of you.
“The one Y/N has of you and the boys on her desk,” He explained for you.
“You have a picture of me on your desk? She asked, clearly touched.
“Not anymore,” You said with a large smile.
“You’re so mean to me,” She said, shaking her head.
“I’ll show you mean. How about I embarrass you in front of that new cop boyfriend of yours,” You smirked.
“How do you know about him?” She asked, shocked.
“I know everything,” You announced ominously, “Plus your mom told me,”
“My mom knows?” She cried.
“Girl, the whole family knows,” You informed, “We took turns running background checks. I did the first one though,”
“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” She countered.
“I can’t control how you feel,” You reminded.
“You know what I meant,” She said, rolling her eyes.
“I’m not a mind reader,” You shrugged, continuing to annoy her.
“You guys are hilarious,” Sonny interjected, now sitting at his desk and laughing at yours and Nicky’s exchange.
“It’s a Reagan thing,” You both said simultaneously before fist bumping each other.
“You definitely look related,” He nodded.
“What do you mean?” You demanded, “We look nothing alike,”
“Sure you do,” He insisted, “You both look like Erin,”
“I think you’ll find that she looks like Erin and I look like my mother who Erin also seems to look like,” You clarified.
“Isn’t that the same thing?” Sonny pointed out.
“No, I don’t like being associated with Erin,” You joked coldly.
“What’s wrong with my Mom?” Nicky asked, playing along.
“So many things,” You pondered.
“Like what?” Nicky persisted.
“Gave birth to you for one,” You whispered under your breath.
“You guys don’t seem like Aunt and Niece,” Sonny commented once again.
“Okay?” You inquired, playing along, “Then what do what we look like,”
“To be honest,” Sonny began, “You guys act and look like sisters,”
“We get that a lot,” Nicky agreed.
“It’s because Erin got knocked up so young,” You informed, “I was still a kid when this one was born,”
“Oh yeah, I always forget that there is such a big age gap between the two of you,” Sonny remembered.
“Should I be offended?” You asked Nicky, jokingly.
“Yeah, anyway that meant we were basically raised together because I stayed with my Grandma a lot growing up,” Nicky continue to explain.
“So yeah, I guess she’s sort of like my younger sister,” You agreed.
“Like I said, you definitely act like it,” Sonny smiled.
“Are you saying I act like a teenager?” You demanded, teasingly.
“Occasionally,” He smirked.
“Fair enough,” You gave in, with a shrug.
“Oh, by the way, you were right about the whole McGarth thing,” Sonny acknowledged, flashing you with smile, “Told us everything we needed to know as soon as I told him that his daughter would go into care,”
“Well, it was only the truth,” You offered, leaning back in your seat, not daring to look at Nicky was staring at you intently.
“But you suggested it,” He insisted.
“But you’re the one who implemented it,” You countered.
“Why can’t you accept my compliment,” He inquired.
“Haven’t done anything to earn it,” You shrugged.
“I can think a couple things,” He commented.
“Like what?” You probed.
“Well, Ma’s been raving been raving about your baking skills ever since you came over the other day,” He chuckled.
“Has she?” You grinned, surprised.
“She says you’re the best baker whose ever cooked for her,” He explained, “She said your tiramisu, is the best she’s ever tested. Even better than my Nonni’s, though she didn’t say that too loud,”
“Really?” You asked surprised.
“Yeah!” He grinned at you, “She told me to tell you that you’re always welcome and then told me to bring you back as much a possible,”
“I’d love to go back. Your family is great.” You reassured.
“But crazy, right?” He teased.
“I’ve got a lifetime of experience with a crazy family,” You joked, grabbing Nicky shoulder and flashing her wink.
“You have to teach me how to cook like that!” He chuckled.
“Ahh,” You sighed, “I can’t cook but I can bake,”
“I can’t believe that you can’t cook,” He commented.
“It’s true,” Nicky chimed in, “She’s burnt water before,”
“How is that even possible?” He laughed.
“I don’t know how I did it. I just did,” You giggled.
“I meant how can you bake but not cook,” He clarified, still laughing.
“There are lot of things about me that are unexplained,” You alluded to mysteriously before giving in, “My mom ran a bakery while I was growing up so I just learned everything from her,”
“That’s sweet,” He complimented.
“Thanks,”
“But she couldn’t teach you how to boil water?” He joked.
“She had five kids. She was busy,” You sighed, smiling as you thought about your mother.
“Well, any way you’ll have to teach me how to bake like that,” He insisted.
“That’s not…” Nicky went to say.
“Sure,” You interrupted, “But only if you teach me how to make that vegetable soup you made me last week,”
“Deal,” He agreed, leaning over you could shake hands as a joke, “You free tonight?”
“I can be,” You offered.
“Then it’s a date,” He winked, “Excuse me for a second,”
He got up to go talk to your ADA, Rafael Barba, who had just walked in. You watched him go before turning back to Nicky. Who was grinning at you profusely, with wide eyes?
“What?” You demanded.
“You have a date,” She sing-songed.
“It’s not like that,” You defended, rolling you eyes, “We hang out all the time after work,”
“And what do you do when you ‘hang out’ after work?” She teased.
“We have hot passionate, no-strings attached sex,” You lied in a dead monotone.
“Wouldn’t be surprised,” She smirked.
“Alright,” You sighed, “You’ve had your fun. Can you drop at now?”
“Why would I do that, when I’m right?” She countered.
“But you aren’t right,” You countered, stating it obviously.
“But you are in love with him so I am,” She argued.
“Why are we back here?” You sighed.
“Because you just provided me with the evidence I needed to prove my theory right,” She stated.
“How?” You inquired.
“That whole conversation for one,” She informed.
“That’s how I talk to everyone!” You exclaimed.
“You’re not that nice and giggly to everyone,” She reminded, “You weren’t sarcastic once. You didn’t call yourself the best once. You didn’t make a joke at his expense once. And you offered to teach him how to bake. He must be special,”
“You make it sound like speaking to me is awful,” You commented.
“It is,” She confirmed before comforting, “But I love you,”
“Love you too,” You mimicked in over exaggerated tone, “But less and less by the minute,”
“How are you still denying it?” She sighed.
“Because it isn’t true,” You speculated.
“Sure it is,” She played along, rolling her eyes this time, “Just like how you’ve stopped going on dates and acting you know generally crazy,”
“You sound like your mother,” You quipped.
“You’re beginning to act like her,” She countered, “All ready settle down and get married and have babies,”
“One who dare you,” You began, “And second do you really thinks your mom wants more kids after what you turned to be like,”
“You attack me because you don’t want to admit your own feelings,” She commented, shaking her head at you disapprovingly.
“And with that, I have to go,” You sighed, standing up realizing you need a file from the record room, “You stay here and try not embarrass me,”
“Do you think your kids will get his hair or yours?” She questioned, not particularly at you, “Will you take his name or do double barrel like Mom,”
“Nicky,” You repeated.
“I can’t promise anything,” She responded to your original question.
“I’ll be back soon,” You gave in, before walking away.
You slid walked past where Sonny and Barba were speaking. You flashed a funny face behind Barba’s face as you went to try and get Sonny to laugh. You walked away quickly so you didn’t get to see what his reaction was but he would probably let you know later anyway, wither embarrassed or triumphant, depending on how it went.
Everything that Nicky had said was playing on your mind. Were you really that obvious with you feelings? Was it that easy to pick up on that your family had figured it out. You thought you were doing a better job of hiding your actual feelings.
You denied it for a while and technically still are. Expect to yourself. You gave in and actually started admitting to yourself and accepting it.
You were in love with Dominick Carisi.
Your partner of just over a year and honestly at this point one of your genuine closest friends.
Did you want it to happen? Of course, not. You knew it wouldn’t work and would never happen but as the months came and went and you got to now each other better and better with every case. You couldn’t help but fall in love with him.
He is the only person you’d ever met that could melt your stone cold, sarcastic and head strong demeanor with a simple glance. He put a magnifying glass to your soul and you could be yourself around him. Your true self.
Still sarcastic but not as confident. Sensitive and excitable. Broken. Someone who loved getting to know people and learning about new things but easily gets confused despite your apparent intelligence. A thing that Sonny took great pleasure in teasing you about.
Unlike you, Sonny was always unapologetically himself. From day one he exuded sensitivity, kindness, and compassion. A family man who took faith seriously but never threw it in your face or forced it on anyone. Supportive and funny and despite initial perceptions extremely skilled when it came to police work like interrogations, breaking suspects and sympathizing with victims.
He was his unique. He has his own crazy quirks that made him who he was. Just like everyone else and just like you.
You were different but very similar. You had opposing personalities at first glance but you also had many things in common. You tended to lean more towards to your brother Danny when it came to getting angry which meant it happened quite a lot. It doesn’t take a lot to make you angry but it takes a lot for Sonny too, which makes it all more impactful when he does. Equally, Sonny often got very emotionally involved with cases and got attached while you favored staying unattached as a coping a mechanism. So of the rare instances you did, everyone knew it was not only important to you but also serious enough to warrant this reaction from you. Or simply it reminded you of one the tragedies in your own life, so they knew to tread lightly around you.
For two people that came from such similar families and backgrounds, you turned out very different. You both came from particularly close, large and catholic families. Irish and Roman respectively. You and Sonny were both the youngest of your siblings and both grew up on Staten Island, unlike your older siblings who all grew up in Brooklyn before your parents relocated. The family was the first thing you bonded over. Swapping stories of living in male and female dominated household and what it was like being the ‘baby’. It brought you much closer as you understood each other on a much more profound level. You and Sonny had some significant qualitative differences however which most likely explain the opposing personalities.
You’ll admit that he isn’t exactly the sort of guy that you had traditionally gone for. You went for the stereotypical bad guy type, not the sort of guy you would want to introduce to your parents. Not like it would ever get there, though. None of your relationships passed the three-month mark. You weren’t interested in finding the one like everyone around. You were only concerned with dating whoever you wanted and doing whatever you wanted and ignoring the underlying issues that you had. So you just dated and slept with reveling guys to distract you from emptiness inside you.
You feared to fall in love because you feared being left alone again. You’d lost such significant figures in your life. Your brother and mother that you couldn’t bear to loose anyone again. So you avoided letting anyone close enough to the level that their loss would have that big of impact well until Sonny.
He paid attention. He picked up on the issue quickly and offered you support and whatever help you needed. He really helped you even when you were strangers back in the first few weeks you knew each other. You took the help only realizing then how bad you’d let everything get.
You don’t know what exact moment you fell in love with him was or why really. It was just an accumulation of everything and now all you knew was that you were in love with him. And you had been for a while now which is why you stopped dating and going out so much.
“Welcome back to my humble abode,” Sonny joked, as he opened the door to his apartment.
“Thank you very much,” You chuckled as you stepped in ahead of him.
It was the end of the work day now and as previously agreed you had headed home with Sonny for an impromptu and mutual cooking and baking lesson.
“So I’m going to ask again are you sure that you have everything we need?” You inquired, once again.
“I know I’ve been saying yes the whole way here but I actually don’t know,” He confessed.
“Sonny,” You whined, spinning around on the spot.
“I’m sorry, but I didn’t know,” He shrugged.
“We could have stopped at the store on the way here,” You pointed out.
“We do have fun at grocery stores,” He agreed, “But I thought we could just order something,”
“Okay,” You complied, confused, taking a seat on his couch, “You ask me her to teach you how to make tiramisu only to tell me that you don’t have any of the ingredients and want to order in. Sonny, why am I here?”
“I’m going to kill you,” He teased, mimicking you.
“I knew it,” You winked, “You have the look,”
“Of a murderer?” He countered.
“Sure,” You shrugged as he took a seat next to you.
“So why am I here?” You repeated, serious this time.
“I do actually want to learn how to make it just not tonight. Tonight I just wanted an excuse to hand out after work with you,” He confessed.
“You can just ask, you know?” You smirked.
“I know but I don’t want you to feel obligated and I don’t like feeling like I’m bothering you,” He confessed.
“You could never bother me,” You reassured, “And I love spending time with you. Especially outside of work, you know.”
“Good,” He grinned.
“Yeah sure,” You added, “We’ve had some of our best conversations outside of the office,”
“Speaking of great conversations. I had a good one with Nicky while you were down in records,” He revealed.
“Everything she said about me is a lie,” You started off and warned.
“No, no, it was good things,” He reassured.
“Like what?” You inquired.
“She was just talking about you and how much you’ve changed over the past year,” He explained.
“For the better, hope,” You joked.
“She thinks so,” He agreed, “Your guys in relationship is the sort of one I hope to have with my nieces when they’re a bit older.”
“Trust me it’s not,” You said.
“Why not?” He countered, “You should see how her face lights up when she talks about you. It’s clear that you’re really important to her. She clearly admires you.”
“I try,” You shrugged, “She’s an only child so I try and be there for her and be more of a sister than an Aunt.”
“It shows,” He complimented.
“Thanks,” You smiled, “And you’re really great Uncle by the way. Those girls adore you. They wouldn’t put make-up on just anybody. You should feel honoured.”
“Trust me I do, especially when I’m washing it all off,” He chuckled, “Nicky also mentioned…”
“Oh god, what did she say,” You interrupted to sigh.
“She mentioned that you weren’t seeing anyone,” He continued to reveal.
“Of course she did,” You sighed yet again, “Take no notice,”
“So you are seeing someone?” He asked, almost disappointed.
“No,no I’m not,” You reassured.
“Oh good,” He grinned, “I think she only mentioned it because you not dating someone is so much deferent to the situation for had ten months ago,”
“My three guys at once stage?” You recalled.
He nodded.
“I’ve changed a lot,” You admitted.
“For the better,” He reassured.
“I know. I just can’t imagine doing that now,” You continued.
“Oh really?” He stated.
“I want different things now. I want to find the one,” You confessed, avoiding eye contact.
“So now you’re just like the rest of us,” He teased.
“Yup,” You giggled.
“Are you ready to start that journey?” He inquired.
“Yes,” You confirmed, “Dating no one for six months…”
“Six months?” He questioned, surprised.
“I hid it well,” You smiled sadly, “So yeah the past few months I regained parts of myself and discovered new parts. And now that my head is clear. I know what I want,”
“And what’s that?” He prompted further.
“Didn’t Nicky tell you?” You toyed.
“She said that you were in love,” He retold.
“I think I am but I don’t know if he feels the same way,” You speculated.
“He does,” He responded, a bit too fast.
“Did she happen to tell you who this person was?” You smirked.
“She suggested someone,” He offered.
“Hmm,” You played along.
“So is it true?” He whispered, as he had been talking both of you had been moving positions and leaning closer.
You were only inches apart.
You took in upon yourself.
You leaned in and kissed him. Your hand going too his cheek as he deepened the kiss.
He eventually reluctantly pulled away some point later.
“Does that answer your question?” You whispered into his ear, his hands unbuttoning your shirt while yours tugged at the waistline of his pants as you both laid down on the couch.
He didn’t have time to respond before you were kissing again and doing much much more, than you had originally anticipated walking into this apartment. But it was so much better.
#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#svu#svu imagine#SVU fanfiction#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#sonny carisi#sonny carisi imagine#Dominick Carisi#Dominick Carisi JR#dominick carisi imagine#dominick carisi jr imagine#Sonny Carisi is coming up#even more#nicky reagan#imagine#svubloods
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Imagine your biological father, Rafael Barba, filing for full legal custody of you (TPELB PART FIVE)
(A/N: I read up on actual case custody law in the state of New York and I have simplified the process for the purposes of the story. So I apologize to any experts or anyone who picks up on the discrepancies. I wanted to keep the story flowing. Beside from that I hope you enjoy this)
Masterlist with all the Parts HERE
Imagine your biological father, Rafael Barba, filing for full legal custody of you
“What do you mean?” You asked, looking up at your Grandpa.
“Well,” He began, taking a deep breath as he tried to mask the extent of his worry, “It means that as soon as the results proved that he was, in fact, your father and he was granted his Order of Affiliation he and his attorney filed for full legal custody of you which therefore means that he is looking for the removal as my rights of your legal guardian,”
“What?” You panicked, looking away, “Can he do that?”
“He can now, he’s officially your Father by law and not just biologically,” He answered.
“But it just doesn’t make sense,” You stated, “And he may he may be all of those things but he isn’t my Dad,”
“I know you’re upset…” He began once again.
“I will be upset,” You corrected, “But right now I’m just angry. Who does he think he is? He’s a stranger to me. A couple of weeks of conversations suddenly justifies to him to be my Dad? He doesn’t even know me! Now he wants to take me away from the only family I’ve ever had. Wait, I am not going to live with you anymore?”
“I don’t know,” He admitted.
“But I don’t want to leave you, Grandpa,” You whispered, tears welling in your eyes.
“I’m going to try my hardest to make sure he doesn’t,” He promised, cupping your face in his hands and wiping your tears as they spilled down your cheeks, “He may fight for you but I’m going to fight harder. I love you so much, Y/N.”
“I love you too, Grandpa,” You whispered before burying yourself into his bear hug, crying silently into his chest.
Over the next few weeks, it was all you could think about. Your family was all so upset, they’d hug you tighter and longer. They were walking on eggshells, trying to make it as normal as possible for you. Any conversations about what was going on were hushed and out of your per view. Your Grandpa always gave you the major updates, not wanting you to be out of the loop.
Your Aunt Erin had enlisted one of her law school friends who was very respectable family law attorney to represent your Grandpa. As both sides had DA’s on them with connections to the court system, the trial was moving along quicker than usual, as apparently the DA didn’t want it getting out that his Senior DA and one of his ADA’s were feuding the family courts so he tried to make it all happen quickly. However, Mr. Barba and his attorney had made it clear that they weren’t willing to negotiate any sort of arrangement so apparently it was pretty clear even before the first appearance that there would be a fully fledged trial.
On the eve of the first appearance at court, your Aunt Erin sat you down and explained to you everything that was going to happen and what might possibly happen. At the first appearance, there would be no testimony or witness just discussing the facts so that things were all cleared up. She also explained that you would be appointed a Law Guardian who will mostly likely during the time between his appointment to the trial being doing some investigations into all of your lives to report back to the judge at trial. Apparently, he sole job was to represent what you wanted but because you are under 14, that meant he also had to explain what he thought was best for you in conjunction with what you wanted. More importantly, she explained that there was a possibility that you may be put into someone else's care leading up to and during the trial. But she promised it was only going to be for around a month or so and that was only if it came to it.
You knew she was playing off that part to an extent. You thought that it was pretty evident that Mr. Barba’s side wasn't going to let you stay with your Grandpa during this process based on his previous actions.
You weren’t going, you’d be at the trial but not any of the preliminary hearings. You were still going to the courthouse though but that is to meet your Law Guardian while the hearing was going on, your Aunt Erin said that you’d probably get to know them pretty well. She also warned you that by the end of it all you may not be allowed to come home.
So once again that morning you missed school to attend court. You made sure to hug everyone extra tight in case you didn’t get see them for a while. Once you arrived, you were taken to a back room, clearly tailored for children as it was filled with toys. You were left alone for a while in the room, so it was a good thing that you had brought some work from school, that you had arraigned in response to your absence, with you. After about ten minutes, you had almost finished work and a nicely dressed tall man came into the room. You only looked up briefly, to see him before continuing.
“Y/N?” He asked in an accent that clearly wasn��t from the city, most likely a Northern city like Chicago or Cleveland.
“That’s me,” You confirmed, still not looking up and finishing your problem.
“I’m Garrett Prince,” He introduced, “Your Law Guardian,”
“Hi Garret,” You replied, closing your book with a flourish as you finished and finally looking back up at him.
“What were you working on?” He inquired, as he took a seat opposite you at the table.
“Geometry,” You informed.
“Can I take a look?” He asked, gently.
“Sure,” You shrugged, sliding it over to him.
He raised his eyebrows as he caught it and flicked through it. You watched the surprise on his face as he registered the problems and also probably how he couldn’t do them himself.
“You can do this?” He asked, surprised.
You nodded.
“That’s really impressive,” He complimented, “I don’t remember doing problems this hard,”
“That’s because it’s college level,” You explained, “And I have a feeling you did Pre-Law in college,”
“You’re right,” He chuckled, “When they told me that you were a genius…”
“You didn’t think they meant an actual genius?” You offered.
“Yeah,” He smiled.
“Should we get to it?” You suggested.
“We can do whatever you want. I am your lawyer, I represent only your best interests,” He responded.
“Yeah, I did some research. I know what your job involves,” You started.
“That’s good,” He commented.
“And I also know what I can do if I don’t like you,” You continued.
“Are you referring to the fact that you can fire me?” He speculated.
“I didn’t refer to anything. You just made an assumption,” You corrected, “Plus I also know that since I’m not 14 your job is not only to represent what want but to balance that with what you think is best for me regardless of my opinion,”
“Technically, but I have a feeling the judge will see you as an exception,” He elaborated, “Because you know, the genius thing,”
“The genius thing,” You repeated chuckling.
“I know this must be a very difficult time for you,” He started, his tone sympathetic and serious, “I read the file and honestly I can’t imagine going through this at such a young age.”
“Well, you don’t have to,” You commented, “You can watch me go through it. So what’s going to happen at the hearing?”
“Well,” He breathed, “First the judge is going to try and get the parties to reach a mutual agreement,”
“Unlikely,” You huffed, “I hear my ‘Father’ is being a real stubborn bitch. I can swear, right?”
“You can say whatever you want,” He reassured.
“That’s cool. I’m not allowed to swear at home,” You revealed, in momentary excitement.
“What’s home like for you?” He diverted delicately.
“We aren’t doing that yet,” You insisted, cutting him off, “What will happen after the judge knows they can’t agree,”
“Well, he’ll most likely try again. No judge wants to go to trial for child custody cases,” He explained, “And when that won’t work he will probably set the court date for a couple of months time. Though in your case it might be a bit quicker because of…”
“Politics?” You offered.
He nodded before continuing, “And after that’s set they will probably deal with issues like when they want my report if they want you psychologically evaluated, when you’re meeting with the judge and where you will be staying during this period until the trial.”
“Don’t you mean whom?” You corrected.
“Basically,” He confirmed and also adding, “As well as who can and can’t come see you during that time,”
“Realistically, how likely is that I’ll get to stay with my Grandpa?” You questioned, hesitantly.
“Truthfully?” He inquired.
You nodded.
“Based on what’ve read. Highly unlikely that you’re Dad…” He began.
“He isn’t my Dad,” You interrupted.
“It’s highly unlikely that Mr. Barba will let you remain with Grandpa,” He corrected, “In fact, I’ve been told that he has made claims to the court that your family may turn you against him,”
“He did a pretty good job of that himself,” You commented, shaking your head in disbelief, “In fact, I find it insulting that he would accuse my family of that. He’s the one making everything difficult we wouldn’t be here if he wasn’t doing that,”
“What do you mean?” Garret pressed, his interest peaked.
“We aren’t there yet,” You countered, realizing your slip of the tongue.
“Okay,” He accepted, “On that subject, the judge will very likely ask me where I think would be the best place to put you during this time,”
“What are you going to do?” You asked.
“What do you want me to do?” He questioned back, “I don’t want to make this even harder on you. None of us do. We want to make sure you’re happy and this doesn’t disrupt your life to much. So I’m asking you, where do you want to stay,”
“With my Grandpa,” You admitted.
“I know,” He smiled sadly, “But that may not be possible,”
“I was made aware of that,” You sighed, “So I took it upon myself to make alternative arrangements,”
“You did?” He asked, surprised.
“Must be a genius thing,” You joke lightly, “And yeah with my friend Will,”
“Y/N…” He began.
“Will is not thirteen,” You interrupted to clarify, already knowing what he was going to stay, “He’s name is Will Gorski and more importantly he is an adult around his late thirties in fact. He’s an attorney and previously a member of the NYPD. So he already has had multiple court standard background checks. He lives in the same neighborhood as my school minimizing disruption. He has a spare bedroom in his apartment which he owns by the way. He’s employed at one of the biggest law firms in the city handling most contracts. He volunteers at youth shelters and does pro bono work. He even had a dog named Dexter. He’s a Great Dane,”
“You really have thought about this,” He commented.
“I have,” You confirmed, “He is the only other person I would be okay with staying with besides my Grandpa,”
“How do you know him?” Garret asked.
“He was my Mother’s old partner before she died. It’s why he left the NYPD,” You explained.
“I’m sorry for your loss,” He empathized.
“Don’t be,” You breathed, empathised sadly not looking directly at him, “I didn’t get to know her long enough to lose her,”
“Still she was your mother,” He reminded, “That’s a traumatic loss to experience,”
“You can’t lose nor miss what you don’t remember ever having,” You admitted sadly, “I simply do not feel the same loss the other members of my family do. It’s the sad truth. One of which I rarely discuss or admit,”
“Thank you for being honest with me,” He smiled reassuringly.
“It was practical reasons not sentimental empathized, “I just want don't to make sure we didn’t do this again. It hurts,”
“I understand. Would this Will be willing to take you on?” He continued to probe, moving on swiftly.
“We talked about it,” You informed.
“You’ve seen him recently?” He asked.
“Every Friday,” You smiled, “It’s one of the highlights of my week,”
“He’s a very big part of your life isn’t he?” He inquired.
“Yeah,” You nodded, you could feel your eyes threatening to spill.
“Would he have any reason to try and influence to one side or the other?” He asked, redirecting the conversation once again.
“No,” You stated adamantly, “He doesn’t know Mr. Barba and he doesn’t really have contact with my family. It hurts them to see him, you know? Reminds them of my mother, I assume. But anyway due to that I don’t think anyone could think that he any others interests. He’s only concerned for my best interests,”
“That’s perfect,” He smiled, “I’m going to go talk to the judge and then I’ll come back and update you on everything that’s happened in court, okay?”
You nodded.
He left the room after that. You once again left alone, a court clerk did come in and offer you snacks and juice but you declined. Too on edge on eating or drink. You tried to read but your mind was too consumed. So you just breathed, trying to steady your breathing as your heart pounded for no reason but anxiety. You pulled out your phone and tapped Will’s number but he didn’t answer. You assume he must be busy or at work. Though he had promised you that he would keep his phone on for you. Your heart sped up again and you started to fidget. You didn’t understand what was happening to you.
And you didn’t have time to figure it out because the door swung open with two familiar faces behind it.
“Hey Y/N,” Will grinned at you.
“What are you doing here?” You asked, confused as you rushed over to hug him.
“What do you think?” He countered, holding you in his arms and leaning down slightly to be in straight eye contact, “I’m here for you,”
“You went to the hearing?” You questioned.
“I wasn’t going too. I was just here to be with you but I got pulled in by your Grandpa. He knew that you would want to stay with me. And when Mr. Prince hear agreed and confirmed my natural position and your wishes. The court agreed that it would be best for you to stay with me,” He explained.
“Thank God,” You breathed, hugging him again.
“You might not feel that way when you find out that you’ll be staying with me for two months,” He mentioned, still hugging you.
“Two months?” You demanded, letting go.
“It’s true,” Garret chimed in, “The dates been set for a little over two months from now,”
“Why?” You inquired.
“So I can conduct my investigation and so the psychologist can compile his report,” Garret explained.
“I have to see a psychologist?” You asked, looking at Will.
“It’s true,” He confirmed reluctantly.
“Why?” You demanded once again.
“It’s a common tactic in cases like this. The one seeking custody pays for the examination as a sign of commitment and dedication to the child,” He elaborated, “It makes them look better,”
“Dedication,” You scoffed, “What else,”
“Your meeting with the judge is the day before the trial starts and each side had been granted two supervised visits with you each week at Will’s residence,” He continued.
“Supervised?” You questioned.
“By me,” Will added.
“Okay and that’s it?” You asked, expectantly.
“Yes,”
“Can I go?” You asked.
“With Will back to his place? Yes,” He confirmed.
“You got other bags?” Will ask, picking up your satchel for you.
You nodded, “My Aunt Erin made me pack a week's worth just in case,”
“She mentioned that she would send you more,” Garret added.
“I can’t get my own stuff?” You asked.
He shook his head, “Unless you want me and each sides lawyers there as well,”
“You know I think she’s had enough for today, you know?” Will interrupt to state and ask even though he knew the answer, “I’m going to take her home and as her temporary legal guardian it’s within my right, right?”
“Of course,” Garret agreed, “But I’ll need to talk to both of you soon,”
“Here’s my card,” Will announced, handing him his card before swinging on your satchel and grabbing the handle of your suitcase, “Let’s go,”
He began walking out the door and you quickly followed. Flashing Garret a brief wave as you went.
“Thank you,” You breathed as soon as you were out of earshot.
“What did I say about thanking me?” He countered, “Let's just get out of here,”
And that’s what you did. He took you back to his apartment after that. He had already set up the guest bedroom in the likelihood that you would be placed under his care. But he assured you that you could do what ever you want to it to make it seem as homely as possible for you. It was mid-afternoon by this time. So it was too late for you to go to school. So you and Will unpacked for a while as he tried to distract you from today's events. Around six he went to go get dinner fro you favorite place while you tried to sort out your room a bit more. You finished earlier than expected and wandered through the apartment for a while. Trying to make yourself feel comfortable to no avail.
You eventually ended up sitting on one of the seats on the balcony. Looking at the view that Will paid a lot to see every morning. It’s when you saw the cities skyline like this with sun descending that you understood your Grandpa’s love for the city and realized your own. It was breathtaking and it was your home. And as long as you were in this city, you couldn’t ever feel homesick.
“Hey, what are you doing out here?” Will ask reappearing, takeout in hand as he clambered onto the balcony to see you.
“Just thinking,” You shrugged as he took a seat in the chair beside your separated only by a table.
“About what?” He probed.
“Sleeping,” You confessed, “I’m wondering how I am going to sleep tonight,”
“Still having problems sleeping?” He asked.
You nodded, looking out the view again.
“Well, we can marathon whatever show you want until you do,” He suggested.
“I have to go to school tomorrow,” You reminded.
“No, you don’t,” He corrected to which you responding by giving him a disapproving look so he elaborated, “What I mean is that I think people will understand that you need a couple days to adjust to your new situation and everything that is going on,”
“You already called my school didn’t you?” You sighed.
“Guilty,” He chuckled.
“What do have in mind?” You asked hesitantly.
“Sleeping in,” He winked.
“That actually sounds pretty nice,” You confessed.
“You know by sleeping in I mean past 8 am,” He clarified.
“You know that’s impossible, right?” You countered.
“Sounds like a challenge,” He grinned meaningly, rubbing his hands, “Anyway, I’ve got dinner,”
He handed your food and you continue to sit on the balcony as you ate. Staring out into the sunset and continuing to talk.
“Your Mom would have hated this,” He commented, before taking a bite.
“Do you think this would be happening if she were here?” You asked.
“I don’t know,” He confessed.
“Do you think she would have told me who he was by now?” You continued.
“She told me that she was going to tell you whenever you were old enough to understand,” He informed.
“So by now, she would have?” You mentioned.
“Maybe, I think it would depend on if she told him or not,” He mentioned.
“Are we all sticking with that story?” You questioned
“You don’t think it’s true?” He asked, surprised.
“I’m just suspicious of it all,” You played off.
“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked.
“Not really,” You confessed.
“So about theses visits,” He began.
“I want to see my Grandpa and the rest of them,” You stated.
“And Mr. Barba?” He continued.
“Not so much,” You stated once again.
“I only ask because he already called to arranged a meeting with you,” He explained.
“Did he now?” You breathed not really asking.
“He wants to see you,” He elaborated.
“Well, I don’t want to see the man who ripped me away from my family so,” You shrugged, aggressively.
“Have you thought about things from his perspective?” He inquired.
“I have,” You confirmed, “And while I was doing it I came up with a hundred different ways to handle this situation better. So, in conclusion, if he wants to be difficult so can I,”
“Y/N, this is may be your first ever act of teenage rebellion against your Dad,” He teased, dramatically.
You rolled your eyes and shoved him playfully.
“Don’t get angry at me you hormonal teen,” He swotted, shoveling another mouthful of food, “But seriously though you could try and give him a chance, possibly hear what he has to say.” He suggested, tactfully.
“I don’t know if I can,” You confessed.
#law and order svu#law and order svu imagine#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#svu#svu imagine#SVU fanfiction#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#rafael barba#rafael barba imagine#ada rafael barba#ada rafael barba imagine#daddybarba#barbaxdaughter#Frank Reagan#frank reagan imagine#reagan#Jamie Reagan#Joe Reagan#Erin Reagan#Danny Reagan#imagine#the people erika left behind#svubloods
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Imagine Rafael figuring out that you're his daughter (TPELB PART THREE)
(A/N: Sorry this is going up later than usual! It took me a while to finish. I hope you enjoy this new installment! I’m glad to hear that you’re enjoying it so far)
Masterlist with all the Parts HERE
Imagine Rafael figuring out that you're his daughter
“Are you okay?” Will asked, eyeing you up after sipping up some of his drink heartily as you had barely touched your own.
You let go of the glass and pushed to the side, you had been playing with the straw and making circles in your milkshake instead of you know actually drinking it.
“Hmm?” He prompted, a concerned look on his face but the waitress came up to check on the two of you.
You watched him as he dismissed her with his awarding winning smile, a quick nod and a brief ‘thank you’.
“Y/N,” He persisted, narrowing his eyes at you, he probably knew by now that you weren’t saying anything on purpose, “What’s going on in that genius little head of yours?”
“Physics mostly,” You sighed, finally speaking.
“Hey!” He protested playfully, “I thought we agreed on no shop talk at dinner!”
“Says the man who spent the past fifteen minutes telling me about the inmate he got released on a technicality,” You pointed out.
“Yeah, but I’m the adult,” He offered poorly, as a defense, “So I can change the rules,”
“You’re really lucky that technician forgot to wear gloves,” You said, shaking your head in disappointment.
“That wasn’t very nice,” He countered.
“I was only being truthful, you are lucky. You told me about all the evidence you had before you found that out or should I say lack thereof,” You shrugged.
“Sometimes being truthful can be hurtful,” He offered, trying to be insightful.
“But wouldn’t it hurt more if I lied to you and then you later found out that I lied to you. It’s more beneficial for you and for me,” You defied.
“How so?” He asked skeptically.
“It’s better to keep our consciences clear,” You grinned.
“You know for someone who preaches about honesty so much you sure do lie a lot,” He commented, before taking another dramatic sip for emphasis, eyeing you up triumphantly.
“When have I lied?” You demanded, narrowing your eyes at him and crinkling your nose, annoyed.
“Well, you lied when you said that physics on your mind and when you said you were okay,” He retold.
“I never said I was okay,” You reminded.
“Which is an admission of guilt,” He stated adamantly, pointing his finger at you.
“So I am okay?” You asked, confused.
“No, you’re not okay,” He corrected for you.
“I’m pretty sure that I know that I would know if I was okay or not,” You speculated, unconvinced.
“Not always, you’re extremely intelligent but not always that emotionally intelligent,” He pointed out.
“So, I’m not okay?” You inquired.
“No, you’re not,” He stated.
“Okay,” You accepted reluctantly.
“So what’s wrong?” He asked once again.
“I don’t know I thought I was okay,” You shrugged, playing dumb.
“Y/N,” He repeated sternly.
“Okay.Okay,” You gave in with a sigh, “Maybe I was lying about thinking about physics,”
“I knew it. You had your confused face and you never look like that when you’re thinking about physics. You don’t even need to think about it. It’s like its second nature to you,” He began to rave triumphantly.
“Are you done?” You questioned, unamused.
“Yeah,” He nodded quickly, before instructing lightly, “Now your thing. Tell me what’s up,”
You took a deep breath. You locked eyes with your Mom’s old partner. He had a genuinely concerned look on his face as he stared back at you. You couldn’t help but cave plus you knew that he was the only person you could ask this question to and have them be completely honest in their response. Which is why you liked meeting up with him every week.
You’ve known Will your entire life. He was basically a part of your family. He had been your mom’s old partner for years before you were born and was up until she died. He left the force after that, understandably, and went back into law and started working and still does at some prestigious city law firm that handles business contracts. Though he occasionally does pro bono work for a charity that helps with suspected miscarriages of justice. Will had taken an active part in your life since before you could remember. Your mom was a single mother through her pregnancy and the first three years of life and though she had a lot of support from you family he was there for her as her best friend and partner. He loved her and you a lot before anything happened. And after she died he continued to be in your life.
When you were little he’d take you out for a day every couple of weeks. But once you grew up a bit, you started seeing each other every week. You went out to eat and then you alternated from going to the movies or to his place to watch TV. You loved TV shows and he loved movies which is why you alternated so you both could do what you wanted. You didn’t a get a lot of time to do it during the week so you always looked forward to it. It was your escape you didn’t have to think while doing it. He dropped you off back at your Grandpas after spending a couple of hours together which was your Grandpa’s only condition as thought it was good for you to spend time together. he understood why you liked spending time with Will.
Your family tries hard to tell you as much about your mother as possible, so you feel as if you know her but the problem is when you love someone and when they have passed away, people especially those who loved them often presented a more idealized picture of them. You know that there must have days where every single one of your family members didn’t like your mom too much but that doesn’t take away from how much they loved her. But of course, they don’t dwell on that part because they miss her so much. Which you completely understand and don’t blame them for but it’s just that when you wonder about your Mother all you have is this version of her and you know it’s not what she was always like.
Will, even though he loved her so much, always speaks about her as if she was still alive and if she was sitting beside him which means that sometimes he talks about the bad experiences as well as the good ones. That was the sort of relationship they had, they teased and messed with each other constantly. He loved her, probably more than you know you suspect. He just loves doing it because it helps him remember and you, of course, love hearing about it because it does make you feel more connected to her. The real her, the one that everyone loved so much and still do.
Will spoke openly about everything involving her, including the cases, they solved together. He had a really good memory so he always remembered and talked about the little things about her. Things that other things didn’t. He saw Like how she crinkled her nose when she was annoyed or cracked her fingers when she was nervous. Stuff that made her an actual person and not just a memory. He loved it when you asked questions about her or what she would think about thinks because he got to talk about all the things he knew about her.
But of course, that wasn’t the only reason you spent time with Will. You actually loved spending time with him. He was funny and made sure that the time you had together wasn’t about work or life in general. Also, he cared about you and love spending time with you as much as you did him. It may sound weird thirteen-year-old being best friends with a thirty something but you needed each other. You helped each other heal. You knew your Mom’s death affected him in many ways and not just career-wise and being around you helped. And vice versa.
“Do you think my mom would have liked me?” You finally let out.
“Ooh okay,” He nodded, thinking deeply, “That’s a pretty heavy question for this early in the evening,”
“That’s why I didn’t want to say anything,” You reminded, playing it off slightly, “You asked for this,”
“I know,” He chuckled lightly, “I’m learning my lesson, right now,”
“You don’t have to answer,” You offered sympathetically, knowing that it was a heavy question.
“No, I want to.” He insisted, “I’m just trying to think of the right words,”
“Don’t,” You said.
“Do you want an honest answer?” He asked.
“Of course,” You stated.
“Well,” He began, “First things first, she loved and would love if she were still here, you more than anything else. I don’t think I can ever describe how much she loved you and it wasn’t just because you were a kid or anything. It was because she spent her whole life taking care of other people, making sure they were happy before she was. She was a lot like your Uncle Danny. She would do anything for a person who she loved or needed help. Which meant sometimes that short temper of hers made her bend the rules for it but fundamentally she was a good person and is quite sensitive like your Uncle Danny, right?”
“Yeah,” You agreed, with a small smile, thinking about your Uncle Danny.
“What I’m trying to say is that because of how much she gave,” He continued, “that she didn’t always treat herself that well because she had this mentality if the people she loved were okay then so was she even if she wasn’t. But joining the force as the first Reagan female and you were the only things that she truly did for herself. There is no denying that when she first found out she was going to have you that she considered a lot of options because the fact was that she was alone in all this. And you know a lot of people told her that she couldn’t do it and there was nothing more that she loved, a lot like you really was proving people wrong. She had you because she wanted to no matter what anyone else wanted. I’m not saying that she didn’t have support because she did. But you are the embodiment of her strength and the resilience of her spirit. Remember that okay! She loved you so much, you were her whole world, from the second you were born. I wish I could describe her face when she first saw you. That was just pure love and happiness. The three years that she got to spend with you were best she ever had, you don’ know how much she wanted to see you grow up and be with you. You will remember, won’t you? Promise me that…”
“I promise,” You complied, taking his hand.
“But to answer your question, would she have you liked you. If I’m being honest, I think she would struggle. She would love you unconditionally but I do think she would struggle because you are so smart and you are so different from her. In every way, besides you know the face. You have the same ticks and the same face but you are nothing alike. I think she would find you weird. Like really weird. She just wouldn’t get you but she would try hard to. Like I can just imagine her trying to help you were homework and being utterly useless. She would like you but she just wouldn’t get you no matter how hard she tried. She’d probably spend most her time trying to distract you so you could do something that she would think was fun. Like some sort of sport.” He finished.
“Really?” You giggled.
“Oh yeah,” He chuckled before putting on a sneaky women’s voice, “She’d be like Y/N. Stop with the Quantum Physics! Let’s go running and then play football and then eat ice cream until our stomachs hurt,”
“Pretty sure all of me would hurt after jogging and playing football consecutively,” You grinned before whispering, “Thank you,”
“Hey,” He whispered back, leaning over the table a little bit, “You don’t have to thank me, ever. Come here,”
You slipped out of your seat across from his and hugged him tightly.
“Next time try and save the heavy questions for when I’ve had a couple of beers,” He joked.
“You don’t drink,” You reminded still engulfed in the hug.
“Exactly,” He continued to joke, “I love you Y/N,”
“I love you too,” You replied kissing his cheek before he hugged you tighter.
And as you hugged the man you had for a long time wished was your Dad, your real Dad was still in his office. He had thought about you and the past a lot.
He knew that he knew your Mother before and that they had been together around the time you were conceived. You suppose he was still in shock about it all. It had been while since he had last thought about that girl he met in the bar. He just couldn’t believe it all, it was hard for him to process. He couldn’t help but mull over all the possibilities that could explain it all expect for the truth. At that point, he was avoiding the obvious because it just seemed so unlikely to him. He didn’t believe in fate and the thought of it bringing him and you the daughter of that girl he couldn’t ever stop thinking about. Seemed like beyond the scope of coincidence.
He wouldn’t accept the obvious and take the action that he thought was right until he was confronted will the cold hard truth. And while you were Will, talking and reminiscing about your mother he was figuring out the truth.
He had decided to stay late that Friday evening, finishing up the work he had. Trying to keep the thoughts at bay by distracting himself. And in by doing so, he finished everything quite quickly, clearly, it had taken a lot to distract him. He was packing up to leave when he got a call from your Aunt Erin, who was also staying late and was also working in her office. He walked down the hall to her office, where she was sitting at her desk and looking intently at the screen.
“You’re here late,” Your Aunt Erin commented as the door shut not even looking up at the man who walked into her office.
“So are you,” He countered, walking over to the seats in front of her desk.
“I’ve got like five current cases,” He sighed.
“Try managing 40,” She quipped jokingly.
They engaged in general work talk, settling on one case to focus on as they were both involved. They were informing each over of their mutual suspects. There came a point when your Aunt Erin, instructed him to look at a witness statement that was on her monitor. He circled the desk and she moved well out the way so he could read it comfortably.
As his lines traveled line from line, as your Aunt Erin continued to talk to him. His gaze fell off the monitor screen and landed on a nearby picture. Your Aunt Erin’s desk and her whole office were littered with photo frames filled with pictures of her family. Including your mother. She kept a picture of you as a baby and your mother close and predominately on her desk, second only to a picture of your cousin Nicky.
You were around one in the picture. You and your mother were standing on a porch at your Grandpa’s house. You assume your Uncle Jamie was taking the photo as he was an avid photographer, not so much anymore. Your Mom was smiling at the camera, cuddling you close, while you were looking up at her, your arm reaching up to her face. Your new green eyes wide as you looked up in awe at the women you had the privilege of calling your mother. It was a beautiful, poignant photo but you had seen it so many time that it had lost its spark with you but you understood why your Aunt Erin kept it so close. Your mom looked so happy in that picture and that’s how she wanted to remember her. Happy.
It was in that moment when Mr. Barba looked at that picture that it all made sense to him. He couldn’t deny it anymore. He had what he knew and he knew it all equated to a high possibility that he was your father. You don’t know what about this picture made him accept it all or it to finally click and neither did he. Perhaps it was large green eyes that were exactly like his. Or maybe it was just your Mother’s face, bright and happy. Or maybe even that even then you looked so much like her, it was uncanny. He couldn’t deny that he once knew her anymore. He couldn’t deny or convince himself against any of this anymore. He was your Father and deep down, he knew it.
“Rafael!” Your Aunt Erin snapped, bringing him back to reality, “Where’d you go?”
“Sorry, it’s late and it’s been a long day,” He played off expertly, composing himself.
“I understand,” She sympathized, “Why don’t you head home and we can look at this on Monday, right?”
“Yeah,” He nodded, “That sounds good,”
“Good,” She smiled.
There was a brief pause between them.
“That’s Y/N, right?” He asked, casually, gesturing to the picture that had entranced him so.
“Yeah,” Your Aunt Erin nodded.
“And that’s your sister?” He inquired softly.
“She was beautiful, right?” She smiled sadly, picking up the picture, “Just like Y/N,”
“She was,” He agreed, “I’m sorry. I just noticed the picture. It was just so you know…”
“I understand and you don’t need to apologize. It’s natural to be curious,” She nodded sympathetically, “It’s why I keep it so close. It’s the closest I’ll ever get to being with her again. ”
“I’m going to go,” He announced, “Have a good night Erin,”
“You too,” She waved off.
He shut the door and headed back to the office, only to grab his bag and phone. Shutting and locking his office, he began walking down the hall, scrolling through his phone. Looking for one particular number. He tapped it quickly once he found it and put it immediately to his ear waiting for it to be answered.
“Hey,” He sighed in relief once a voice crackled over the phone, “I know it’s late but I really need your help…”
“Y/N,” Your Uncle Danny singsonged, waving a file around as he practically skipped into the living room.
It was a couple of days later, early Sunday afternoon. Family lunch was being prepared and you your cousins were sitting in your Grandpa’s living room waiting for it all to be done so you could eat. Sean and Jack were playing video games while Nicky was making you listen to an album in an attempt to convince you to attend a concert of said artist because apparently if it’s only her and her mom going it would be nothing less of a disaster.
“Sorry, Uncle Danny,” Nicky responded, keeping the headphones on your head after you struggled to take them off at the faint sound of someone calling your name, “Y/N is busy at the moment,”
“Doing what?” He questioned skeptically, leaning on the back of the couch and staring at the two of you who were sitting on the rug by the coffee table.
“Listening,” She insisted, turning up the volume so you couldn’t hear anything anymore.
You gave Nicky a look, trying to indicate that your eardrums were seconds from rupturing. She quickly turned down the volume and once she looked away you took the opportunity to remove the headphones.
“Y/N!” She scolded as soon as she saw but caving, “What did you think?”
“It was thought-provoking,” You offered.
“But did you like it?” She persisted.
“Enough,” You shrugged.
“Enough to listen to it for three hours?” She continued to inquire.
“Maybe, I’ll listen to again. Like I did with the first album and hopefully, I’ll understand better. Get me the ticket.” You suggested hopefully, to make her feel better.
You knew that you were going to go regardless of what you thought of the music but you couldn’t say that outright as Nicky would only want you to come if she knew that you would enjoy yourself as much as she will.
“Thank you so so much,” She smiled, hugging you tightly, “You’re the best and saving me from so much lecturing,”
“I live to help,” You joked, before looking over her shoulder at your Uncle Danny who was watching with a confused expression.
“Are you done?” He asked.
“Yeah,” You nodded.
“Good,” He grinned, before jumping over the couch childishly, “I need you to take a look at this,”
“What is it,” You standing up and taking a seat on the couch beside where he had filed.
“It’s a case,” He whispered, looking around to see if anyone one else was around.
“I thought you weren’t allowed to show Y/N any more cases,” Nicky piped up and reminded.
“This one is important,” He stated.
“You said that last time,” Your Uncle Jamie chimed in, coming from nowhere, taking a seat in the armchair, a beer in his hand.
“Oh look it’s the morality police,” Your Uncle Danny defied tactfully, “And no the last time was the first time and that time. Y/N accidentally saw my file after I accidentally left it on the counter. Who am I to stop curious minds?”,”
“Well that’s is not what’s happening here. And I’m just curious why you are showing a thirteen-year-old a case file for a double homicide?” Your Uncle Jamie persisted.
“Because I solved the last case he showed me in five minutes even though he had been was working on for weeks,” You informed.
“Danny, do you even care about the effects that it could have on Y/N, showing her all this stuff?” Jamie demanded.
“She’s fine,” Uncle Danny insisted, “Right?”
You nodded, “I’ve seen much worse,”
“Where?” Uncle Danny asked
“Uncle Jamie showed Texas Chainsaw Massacre,” You added.
“But I’m the bad influence,” Your Uncle Danny said dramatically.
“In my defense, it isn’t as bad as an actual dead body. That could do some serious damage. Haven’t you learned your lesson by now?” Jamie defended.
“Yeah Uncle Danny,” Nicky added.
“I told you to stay in the car,” He reminded Nicky.
“You shouldn’t have taken her in the first place,” Your Aunt Erin suddenly added from the doorway.
“Is everyone getting involved now?” Danny sighed, “I wasn’t even going to show her the pictures.”
“She’s still a kid,” She continued to insist.
“She’s not really a kid though,” He argued.
“Why, is she technically a teenager?” She questioned, unamused and still disapproving.
“I was going to say genius,” He corrected.
“Thanks,” You said.
“No problem,” He smiled at you, “Instead of listening to these guys. I’ll just ask you what you want to do, do you want to take a look or not?”
You nodded, “I find it fascinating,”
“Are you sure?” Your Aunt Erin asked.
“He makes a point not to show me any of the really bad stuff and it truly is just the factual information. It’s like reading a true crime novel. It’s like a puzzle,” You reassured and defending, “Plus it's really good bonding experience,”
“You see. Looks like I’m not that bad after all,” Your Uncle Danny said triumphantly, “You always were my favorite Niece,”
“Hey!” Nicky protested.
“Under fifteen,” He quickly amended.
“And it’s great to solve things Danny can’t in under ten minutes,” You added, giving your Uncle Jamie and Aunt Erin a wink.
“Hey!” Your Uncle Danny protested.
“Don’t worry,” You comforted, “Uncle Joe and Sonny ask me to do it sometimes.”
“I knew it!” He said.
“Knew what?” Your Uncle Joe added, popping his head around the door, “And food’s ready,”
“After lunch?” Your Uncle Danny asked.
“After lunch,” You confirmed.
After everything was said and done and everyone was going home. You tagged along with your Aunt Erin and Nicky, to go shopping in the city. Apparently, you were in dire need of new clothes, a fact that you were unaware of. Particularly as you were usually stuck in your uniform most of the time. On the way, your Aunt Erin had to stop at her office to get some stuff that couldn’t wait until tomorrow. You took the opportunity to hunt for your missing headphones that you had lost a couple of days earlier.
You couldn’t find them in her office so you assumed they would be in Mr. Barba’s. You went to take a look despite your Aunt Erin’s warnings that it was most likely locked as he wasn’t in. But as you approached, you saw that the door was ajar and that there were lights coming from inside.
“Mr. Barba?” You questioned as you stepped in, you watched him turn around in surprise and spot you.
“Y/N?” He questioned confused, “What are you doing here?”
“My Aunt Erin was getting something from her office and I was looking for my headphones,” You explained, confused and cowering slightly at his intense gaze.
He was staring intently at you.
“You mean these?” He asked, picking them off from the shelf and walking over to hand them to you.
“Yeah, thanks,” You said as you took them with a smile, “So what are you doing here?”
“Just getting some work done and I have a meeting with someone,” He informed quickly.
“On a Sunday afternoon?” You questioned, skeptically.
“It’s urgent,” He offered.
“Oh, I see,” You nodded, taking that as the reason as why he was acting so strange.
He still hadn’t taken his eyes off you as if he was studying you.
“Is it about a case?” You inquired.
“Yeah,” He replied but he titled his head as if he were lying, “She should be here at any minute.”
“I should leave then,” You said, turning.
“It was nice to see you Y/N,” He called after you, causing you to stop a couple of feet away from the door.
“You too…” You smiled, understanding that he was clearly doing something important, you were about to say something but you were interrupted.
“Rafael?” You heard a women say from behind.
Causing you to turn around and look at her.
“Hi,” You smiled, catching sight of the pretty women that stepped into Mr. Barba’s office.
“Hi,” She returned, looking at you intently, just like he was.
“I was just leaving,” You said awkwardly, with a wave, before slipping out of that suspiciously increasingly intense situation, “Bye,”
But you shook off the thought, running back down the corridor back to your Aunt Erin and cousin Nicky. Unaware of what was going on in the office that she just left.
“Are you sure about all of this?” The woman inquired as soon as you were out the door.
“Even more so now after all of this,” Mr. Barba confirmed, tossing a brown envelope on his desk which he retrieved from the draw of his desk.
“Was that her?” The woman asked, taking a seat in one of the chairs in front of Mr. Barba’s desk.
“Yes,” He nodded, from his seat behind the desk, looking at the door that you had just closed before turning to look at her, “That was my daughter,”
#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#svu#svu imagine#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#rafael barba#rafael barba imagine#ada rafael barba#ada rafael barba imagine#Reagan#Danny Reagan#Erin Reagan#Jamie Reagan#Joe Reagan#danny reagan imagine#jamie reagan imagine#joe reagan imagine#svubloods#the people ericka left behind#imagine
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Imagine finding out that Rafael Barba is your father (TPELB PART FOUR)
(A/N: Sorry this is late. Did a lot of research on New York State laws involving custody to try and make this as realistic as possible. Hope you enjoy)
Masterlist with all the Parts HERE
Imagine finding out that Rafael Barba is your father
“This is good,” She nodded as she leafed through the contents of the brown envelope that Mr. Barba had handed to him.
You later learned she was one of Mr. Barba’s friends from back at Harvard law school. Her name was Ella Hennessy and she was now a predominant Divorce lawyer who had a lot of experience in family matters like the one Mr. Barba had suddenly found himself in. So knowing that she was the best as soon as he left you Aunt Erin’s office that Friday night, he called her and sought her advice. She had advised him on what to do to try and help confirm his suspicions before proceeding any further with anything actually legal. So that’s what he did all weekend and he finally had enough on Sunday so he called her to come to his office late Sunday afternoon.
“So,” Your Dad began, leaning back in his chair, trying to keep the muddle of emotions he was feelings under control, “What do we do now?”
“Well, first we’re going to need to petition for an Order of Affiliation because right now you have no legal right to Y/N. You’re not on the birth certificate and neither you or her mother signed an Acknowledgement of Paternity form declaring that you were Father so you’ll need that first before you can get any rights concerning her,” She explained.
“And I need that too…” He alluded to with a hand gesture.
“Yes,” She nodded.
“What if they say I’m not?” He inquired.
“A support magistrate can order a DNA test and send the results to the judge,” She continued.
“Y/N, would find out at that point, right?” He probed.
“Well, typically both parties are there when the DNA is taken,” She confirmed.
“Okay,” He breathed.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” She asked, seriously.
“The first stage yes. The second stage I don’t know yet,” He admitted.
“I’ve never seen you so indecisive,” She commented.
“I’ve never been in this situation before,” He quipped.
“Okay, you need to make a decision soon because as soon as we get the results, you still don’t get anything. You’ll be legally her Father but you have to take the next step,” She reminded.
“I understand,” He nodded.
“I’ll file the papers in the morning. They should be served in the afternoon. The test can be done next week,” She added.
“Any earlier?” He inquired, “I need to know for definite even though I know that she is,”
“Fatherly instincts already kicking in?” She smiled before suggesting, “Possibly if we go private? Would you be willing to pay for that?”
He nodded.
“Then by Friday and the results in the following week,” She corrected, getting up.
“Thank you,” He said solemnly.
“You don’t have to say that,” She joked, “You’re paying me,”
“A lot I’m assuming?” He smirked finally.
“You might just get yourself a discount by being my friend and all,” She shrugged.
“Just might?” He questioned.
“I have a feeling this is going to be a lot of work, yeah so might,” She sighed.
“It’s okay,” He reassured, “I’d pay anything,”
The next day went pretty normally for you despite everything that was going on. Mr. Barba’s lawyer had filed that morning and your Grandfather had been served the court papers that afternoon at his office. He immediately called your Aunt Erin, who rushed down to his office and apparently the news spread like wildfire amongst your adult families. You guess they were all so surprised, someone was coming forward and saying that they were your Father. Even more so by the fact that it was someone that the majority of them had had encounters with, a colleague of your Uncle and Aunt.
You were still with unaware at that point of what was going on, though you knew something was up. When you got to the station after school that day, your Uncle Joe wasn’t there and nobody could tell you where he went. Typically, they could by saying he was off somewhere working on a case but today they just said he was out on personal business. When he did return, he hugged you tightly and played off your question when you asked him where he had been. You didn’t think much of it until you got home that night. When you arrived your whole family was there, your Grandpa, your Aunt and all three of your Uncle’s as soon as you got there with Joe. You saw all their expressions change when they saw you, from serious to intense to soft and almost worrisome. They like Joe all hugged you tightly and asked you questions in these strange voices as if they were babying you. You and your Great Grandpa Henry were banished to the kitchen while they all discussed something private, they even went to extra trouble to check that you couldn’t listen in.
“Do you know what’s going on in there?” You inquired after you had settled down at home and launched into a game of chess with your Great Grandfather.
“No idea. They haven’t told me anything,” He confessed, as he finally made his move after thinking about it for just under a minute, clicking the timer to indicate your turn.
“Is that because they knew you would tell me?” You questioned, quickly moving you piece and hitting the timer in under ten seconds.
“I can keep a secret,” He insisted, distracted as he thought about his next move.
“You couldn’t keep Aunt Erin surprise 40th birthday party a secret,” You reminded, “Or the fact Grandma was pregnant with Uncle Jamie according to Grandpa. Or the fact that Sean doesn’t like his Mom’s homemade chili…”
“Who told you that?” He demanded.
“Sean did,” You stated.
“Well, know he can’t keep a secret,” He commented.
“But it wasn’t a secret,” You reminded.
“I know just…” He began before giving up before insisting, “It’s your turn,”
“No, it’s yours,” You corrected.
“How did you do that so quickly?” He asked, astonished.
You shrugged. He made a moved and you swiftly checkmated him.
“How about we play two out of three?” He suggested.
“How about we listen?” You suggested instead, getting up.
“Y/N,” He warned, stopping you by holding onto your forearm gently, his tone was serious “I don’t think you should do that,”
“Okay,” You nodded automatically, clearly this wasn’t a situation for you to listen to.
Later that night, you came downstairs from getting change intending on getting a glass of water before bed. You had already said goodnight to everyone and you knew that by now your Great Grandpa had already gone to bed so maybe you were getting water but maybe you were investigating what was going on.
“Y/N?” You heard your Grandpa’s voice call from the lounge as you tried to walk past to the kitchen.
“Who?” You joked, turning around and heading towards him.
“What are you doing out of bed?” He inquired.
“Getting water,” You answered, taking a seat close to him on a nearby couch.
“Why didn’t you just get it from upstairs?” He asked, simply, titling his head.
“It just tastes different when it come from upstairs,” You shrugged.
He chuckled at you.
“So what’s going on?” You asked, blatantly.
“Honestly, I don’t know yet,” He admitted, shifting in his seat.
“Is it about me?” You sensed.
He nodded.
“Why can’t you tell me then?” You questioned.
“I don’t want you to get your hopes up because I fear that this just might be someone trying to hurt one of us and they are cruelly using you to do it,” He explained honestly.
“Do they see me as an easy target or something?” You asked.
“Maybe or maybe just a convenient one,” He sighed.
“What do you mean?” You asked.
“Nothing,” He quickly took back, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that,”
“Why not?”
“Y/N, can you do me a favour?” He replied without answering.
You nodded.
“I know you go to the park on Tuesday for lunch but would you mind not doing that tomorrow?” He inquired, gently.
“Okay,” You agreed.
“No conditions?” He said surprised.
“You didn’t let me finish,” You grinned, “Only if you let me know what this is all about someday,”
“Depending on the outcome that day may be sooner rather than later,” He quipped.
“Should I be worried about this?” You asked, softly.
“No,” He confirmed, “You leave all the worrying to me. Now get your water and go to bed. You have a chemistry test in the morning.”
“You remembered!” You smiled.
“I do listen when you talk,” He grinned.
“Nice to now I’m heard,” You joked before getting up and going over to hug him, you kissed him on the cheek and said while hugging him, “Goodnight Grandpa,”
“Goodnight Y/N. I love you.” He said, kissing you cheek while still hugging you.
“Everyone has been saying that to me today,” You commented.
“That’s because it’s true, you have enhanced our lives in so many ways. I can’t imagine you not being here with us, ” He complimented, looking right at you his tone serious and yes intense before breaking into a joke, “I wouldn’t know anything about Quantum Theory if it wasn’t for you,”
“It’s fascinating isn’t it?” You exclaimed excited, eyes widening.
“Partially,” He winked before pulling a face, “I wouldn’t want to go to another lecture on it,”
As promised you didn’t go to the park that day and you had intended on explaining and apologising to Mr. Barba for not being there when you went to the DA’s office that afternoon with your Aunt Erin but you didn’t get to go as your Aunt Erin picked you up straight from school after your extra curricular and drove you home. She even stayed and did her work there at the dining room table that evening. It was strange but you didn’t think much of it. Maybe you should have…
The next morning despite going home that evening, your Aunt Erin was at the house again. Nobody came here this early in the morning so you were surprised when you saw her eating breakfast in the kitchen while walking around frantically while talking to your Grandpa and Great Grandpa. As you stepped down the last step, your Uncle Joe also came through the door. You gave him a confused look as you leaned on the staircase.
“Y/N,” He greeted flustered by your sudden immediate appearance, “What are you doing here?”
“I live here,” You reminded, tilting your head.
“I meant what are you still doing?” He corrected.
“It’s 6:45,” You stated, “I don’t leave for another fifteen minutes,”
“Well, then you should really get your breakfast then,” He cried dramatically before ushered you nervously.
“Y/N,” Your Aunt Erin cried upon seeing you come into the kitchen, she practically choked on her cereal before asking in the same tone as your Uncle Joe had, “How are you doing? Are you hungry?”
“Is this about the same thing we talked about yesterday?” You asked your Grandpa, turning to look at him.
He nodded.
“I won’t ask any questions,” You informed, going to the refrigerator, “But Grandpa you might want to explain to your children how to be discreet around the person they are talking about,”
“I was thinking the same thing,” He chuckled.
You didn’t have to wait long to find out why they were there that early and what was going on. You got answers after school that very day. Unusually, after school that day, your Uncle Joe was waiting for you and he took you to your Grandpa’s office which you rarely ever went to. You remember how everyone was staring at you as you and your Uncle Joe made the walk up to his office. That morning they had gone to initial hearing about something called an Order of Affiliation that a man who was claiming to be you ‘father’ was trying to get issued. Your family had obviously denied it as they man had no real evidence to prove that he was, so the judge had ordered a DNA test to settle the dispute as both sides were ‘reputable’. Your Grandpa explained it to you alongside all three of your Uncles and your Aunt, who of course already knew. They knew at this point that they had to tell you some aspects as you would have to go down to a lab to get the test done.
“So who is it?” You asked, looking up at all of them.
They all made faces at each other. It was hard on them and you could understand that. It was a very difficult situation and it was hard to navigate and decide what the right thing to do was. You knew that they had banded together to decide what the best thing to do in this situation that you knew that they never thought they would be in.
“I thought it would be best if we didn’t tell you who it was until we know for definite,” Your Grandpa replied for them.
“Okay, I can accept that,” You nodded.
“Really?” Uncle Danny questioned surprised.
“Yep,” You confirmed.
“I thought you’d put up more of a fight,” He commented.
“I would but I can tell by your faces that you’re serious so why to make it harder?” You shrugged.
“When did she turn great into such kid?” Danny asked, turning to his siblings.
“While you were busy being a bad parent,” Erin teased.
“Hey, what did I do?” He demanded.
“To name one thing…” She began turning to him.
“Don’t bring that up again,” He sighed, rolling his eyes, already knowing what she was going to say.
To be honest, everyone knew.
“Can we bring it back to me for one-second?” You interrupted with a smile, “I have one question,”
“What is it kiddo?” Your Uncle Joe asked, gently, kneeling down by the side of the chair you were sitting in.
“Do I know this person?” You inquired.
They all exchanged looks again. Your Aunt Erin and Uncle Joe said yes while your Uncle’s Jamie and Danny said no. To which, they all started to squabble again. You could tell that they were all so worried about saying the right thing. They cared so much about protecting you that it was actually sweet how they descended back into acting into children.
“Do I?” You asked again, looking at your Grandfather.
“Apparently, you do,” He confirmed.
You know that it might seem weird that you were just so okay with them keeping things from you about the situation, even though you were so involved. It was a despite over your paternity after all. But you could also see that it was highly unlikely that your actual Father would suddenly come into your life at this stage without any real prompting. It would be unusual and not that plausible. A possibility no doubt but unlikely. It was more likely at least to you that it was just someone trying to get back at your family for some political reason and they were using you to do it. You were quite a notable figure in the Reagan family. You attended a lot of functions with your Grandpa and when documented they would also note that you were the child of his deceased daughter and that he was custody of you. You were also accredited often for some of your work in the field of science and they would also note that you were an orphan under the care of your Grandfather, the Police Commissioner. So you could see how you would be an easy target for people looking to hurt one of your family members.
“So when’s the test?” You asked, casually.
“Friday morning,” Your Aunt Erin replied.
“So I’d miss school?” You questioned.
“At least there is something good coming out of it, right?” Your Uncle Jamie, mentioned, knowing that you didn’t like Friday mornings.
“Anything to get out of Dr. Charlesworth’s Friday lecture. The factual inaccuracies he spews frustrates me to an astronomical level. It is excruciatingly painful. It doesn’t venue make sense!” You shuddered, just the thought being enough to annoy you.
“Is that nerd for she doesn’t like her teacher?” Your Uncle Danny asked which made you all laugh.
That night you stayed up researching paternity tests and how they worked within New York’s state legislature. Based on what you read you thought that you would see whoever was trying to claim was your Father at the test but your family had opted to keep it secret. And even though you knew that it was very unlikely that this person was your biological Father. You wondered who it was out of everyone you knew and what would happen if they were your Father. What would happen and if they weren’t, would your family tell you who it was, anyway?
The test came and went and you actually found it fun. The technician let you use some the equipment as she prepped to take the sample, she even let you stay back after and talked you through some of the new equipment that had been brought in. It was private lab and based on what you read the Father pays for it so you could make a reasonable assumption that whoever it was had money.
You went to school after that and mostly things went back to normal while you all waited for the results. Your family members were clearly tense about the whole situation but you weren’t for some reason. Maybe it was because that you had spent your whole life waiting for an answer on who you Father was, so you didn’t feel the anticipation that they did so strongly. They had pushed conversations about when they thought you were out of earshot, but you Grandpa made it a priority to include you in the conversation because at the end of the day this was about you.
You felt fine but you didn’t know how you should have felt. Should you have been worried about it all? You tried to think of possibilities and outcomes like you usually would but it was like your brain was too muddled to think straight due to all the emotion. So you ignored it, telling yourself that if you made yourself that it wouldn’t hurt as much when you got that negative result. Because at that point you were so sure that it would be a negative. That this person wasn’t your Father and you would go back to living without knowing. But just this slight possibility was putting you on edge, you just didn’t show it. You had to be brave if not for you, for them. You didn’t want your family worrying too much about your welfare because of all this.
You soon found out of course that slight possibility was actually your reality.
You’d spent the next week trying to ignore what was going on and how your family was holding their breath for the results.
“All my limbs can become trees, All my children can become me, What a mess I leave, To follow” You hummed to yourself while delicately playing the keys on the piano.
You were sitting at the Grand Piano in your schools main hall. Playing softly a song on the piano as you waited for your Violin Instructor for a private lesson there. The day was over and it was about fifteen minutes after the school day ended. You often got there early and when you did, instead of practicing your instrument of trade the violin, you played the piano. Your Great Grandpa Henry had taught you how to play piano, just like he had taught your mother. Hoping you would take it up like she did but you loved the violin but you found comfort in playing the piano beyond your Mother’s legacy. Like you were bonded it to in more way than one.
You continued to play and sing to yourself, the sound echoing in the grand empty hall. Summer sun streaming through the large stain glass window.
“In the darkness, I will meet my creators, They will all agree, I’m a suffocator…” You continued to sing until you heard the door open.
You looked over, expecting to see your Instructor and expecting him to chastise you for playing the piano instead of your Violin but you didn’t see him. With the sunlight, you saw someone different.
“Grandpa?” You questioned, as you looked over from your elevated position on the stage.
“Y/N,” He greeted with a smile, his hands tucked into his pockets of his signature coat.
“What are you doing here?” You inquired, getting up and walking to the edge of the stage.
He walked over to meet you and put his hand out to help jump down from the ledge.
“I thought we could take a walk,” He explained.
“I have my lesson,” You refuted.
“I told your instructor you couldn’t make it today,” He informed.
“Okay,” You agreed, grabbing your bag and violin.
“Come on,” He prompted before you both walked towards the door.
You headed to the park together and you talked on the way there absent-mindedly about each others days and other things. You refrained from asking what was going on because you knew and you had a feeling that he was going to tell you when you reached wherever he was taking you. After about twenty minutes of walking and talking, you found yourself walking on the embankment towards the same row of benches that you often and sat and talked to Mr. Barba on. You were unaware of the significance at that point.
Your Grandpa sat you down as the breeze hit.
“So, I assume you know what I’m going to say,” He began, looking at you.
“You got the results today,” You filled in.
He nodded.
“So…?” You prompted.
He took a deep breath.
“You don’t have to worry Grandpa. I don’t really care about it and I know what you’re going to say anyway so,” You comforted.
“I don’t think you do,” He corrected.
“What do you mean?” You asked, “It was negative right? The person was just using me to get to you or Aunt Erin or Uncle Danny…”
“Y/N…” He began.
“I’m right, right?” You interrupted, confused by the fact that he wasn’t immediately agreeing with you.
“Y/N,” He began, once again, taking your hands in his, “He is your Father,”
“What?” You demanded in disbelief, “No…It just doesn’t make sense,”
“I know,” He comforted, “But the results say that he is undoubtedly your Father,”
“Why now? After all, this time why now?” You demanded.
“He says that he only recently figured it out,” He explained.
“How? It’s not like anyone told him!” You stated.
“His party says that you did,” He informed.
“Me?” You questioned.
“Apparently, meeting you and getting to know you were the catalyst to all this. He found out you existed because he met you and using what you told him the pieces together,” He elaborated.
“Wait, who is it?” You inquired, after a pause as you realized that you hadn’t asked the most important question in your shock.
“Assistant District Attorney Rafael Barba,” He revealed.
“Mr. Barba?” You repeated, “What? How?”
Then everything clicked in your mind at that moment. You thought back to all the conversations you had and how he was so interested in you and your past. Did he know then, you thought to yourself. You remembered showing him a photo of her, talking about your mom. Was he just looking for information or was all just coincidence and he put it all together?
“So you do know him?” He asked.
“Yeah, sometimes I sit in his office when I’m with Aunt Erin. He was really nice and we talked a lot about mom and me and stuff,” You stuttered as your mind continued to race.
“Y/N, I’m so sorry,” He sympathized, hugging you as tears spilled down your cheeks.
“Why are you apologizing? Why am I crying?” You stumble, hugging him tight as emotions overwhelmed you.
“It’s okay, Y/N.” He comforted once again.
“No, it’s not. I have so many questions like when did he find out and how long has he known. Was he looking for me? Why is this all happening? What’s going to happen now?” You ranted, as you continued to cry.
“Unfortunately, I can’t answer those questions Y/N,” He explained, kissing the top of your head as you buried yourself into his side, “I only known one thing for definite…”
“What’s that?” You prompted, looking up at him, your vision blurred by your tear-filled eyes.
“He’s going to fight for you,”
#law and order svu#Law and Order: Special Victims Unit#law and order svu imagine#svu#svu imagine#SVU fanfiction#Blue Bloods#blue bloods imagine#SVUxbluebloods#bluebloodsxSVU#rafael barba#rafael barba imagine#ada rafael barba#ada rafael barba imagine#Frank Reagan#frank reagan imagine#Joe Reagan#joe reagan imagine#Erin Reagan#Danny Reagan#danny reagan imagine#daddybarba#barbaxdaughter#imagine#the people erika left behind#svubloods
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