#annnnnyway no one needs to know that but whatever 💖
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it has to be said though, I had a lovely rest of the day after my breakdown this morning. it was very cathartic. painted for like eight hours after that, and had a good time doing it.
#also watched Sad Boyz for... well that entire time tbh#maybe that also helped. probably. Jarvis in particular is always incredibly calming to me. I relate to him so much so it helps when he says#something very eloquent about his feelings or whatever. idk it's just good#big feelings day today I guess#alsooo had a......... long shower... for the first time in a month/since I've been here. if you get what I'm saying. because I'm#uncomfortable saying it lol. anyway that... also helped#removed a lot of the way-too-horny anxiety lol.#annnnnyway no one needs to know that but whatever 💖#then I rewatched the night court episode with the law club where Dan is really just. selfless. and does something so nice for Christine#man I love that episode#he's my good boy. I could totally fix him and show him that he isn't the worst person on earth. that'd be fun#it'd fix me too tbh#or we could make each other worse 💖 I'd be okay with that too#anyway it's bed/daydream time. so that'll be fun haha#it is very frustrating that I can only realise things about myself and my own life through fictional characters and random guys. but#whatever I'll take what I can get#personal
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