#and roy going NOPE NOPE NOPE IM HAPPY FOR YOU BUT DONT TELL ME ABOUT YOUR KINKS. PLEASE. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

player1064 · 3 months

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Still doing drabbles? How about after filming the podcast roy "nobody-fucks-with-gary-but-me" keano walks in on jamie cheekily pinning gary down/against the wall or something and is about to throw hands before gary awkwardly explains his former captain that yes he and the scouser are in fact a couple and yes he is very much consenting being manhandled by the said scouser

YES LETS GOOOOO I love love love the way Roy used to talk about Gary and about how he needed like. protecting... and the way he was always like 'but Gary's so small' babe you're the same height...........

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There’d been a weird sort of tension in the air when they’d been recording the podcast today, though Roy seems to have been the only one to notice. Maybe it’s that Jill and Ian haven’t been putting up with Gary as long as he has (more than half his life now, Jesus), so they’re not as attuned to all his moods.

But he had definitely been in a mood, he’d been sneaking glances at Jamie like he was waiting for a bubble to burst, and Jamie had barely looked at him at all. Which, for Jamie, is definitely enough to ring warning bells.

As they’re heading out for the day, Ian asks if they’re on for their usual pub lunch, but out of the corner of his eye he sees Gary looking around shiftily before disappearing off into one of the offices down the corridor and he figures he’d better check up on him first. He tells Ian he’ll meet him at the pub in a bit, then sticks his hands in his pockets and wanders down the corridor like he couldn’t care less where he ends up.

Except, all of that perfectly practiced disinterest goes flying out the window when he hears a chair clattering to the ground, hears the thud of something (someone, from the sounds of it) being shoved against a wall.

It’s not that Gary’s special, mind you, or that Roy feels any particular sort of attachment to him. It’s just that, well, he sort of is attached to him, isn’t he? Can’t seem to ever shake him off his tail. And he’d do the same for any of his former teammates, of course he would, but none of his former teammates ever got into half as much trouble as Gary did.

And it’s just – Gary’s so small. Even now, with all ninety kilograms of him, he seems dwarfed by everyone he meets. So when Roy hears that thud, he doesn’t have to think about it at all before he strides to the door of the meeting room and bursts through it.

And of course, just his luck – it’s Jamie bloody Carragher who’s got Gary pinned to the wall, one hand dangerously close to his throat. His body is pressed close to Gary’s, and he’s got a few inches on him and he boxes, doesn’t he? Every day, he’d said once, so there’s no hope for Gary getting out of this on his own.

Gary’s frozen in place, looking up at Jamie with wide eyes, his mouth partly open like he’d been in the middle of saying something when Roy had come clattering in. Instantly, though, his eyes dart to Roy and his cheeks flush red as Jamie jumps off him. In a split second he’s put a good metre or so of space between them, keeping his hands in the air.

“Roy, fuck,” Gary says, breathless, “I didn’t realise anyone else was still ‘ere.”

“And good thing I was, eh?” he says, careful, measured. Because Roy Keane is in his fifties now, and he does not lose his cool. He turns to Jamie. “What the fuck d’you think you’re doing, Jamie! I’ve always thought you were a decent guy, but look at yourself, getting all up in Gary’s face when there’s nobody around to defend him.”

“Roy –” Gary tries to cut in, like he’s embarrassed that he’s still getting picked on after all these years, that he’s still an easy target.

Roy puts a hand up to stop him from talking. “We’re grown men! Whatever stupid thing Gary’s said or done this time can’t justify coming to blows, and even if it did it’s hardly a fair match now is it?”

“Roy –” Gary tries again.

“No, look, he should pick on someone his own size! Or better, just not pick on anyone at all! Honestly, how old are you again?”

“Roy,” Gary says, a little more forcefully this time. “We weren’t fighting.”

“Well that’s what I’m saying! It’s only a fight if it’s equal sided!”

“No, Roy.” He clears his throat. “Roy, um. That’s not – I mean, it weren’t –”

Gary shoots a desperate sort of look to Jamie, who steps towards Roy, hands still raised, and says “what he’s tryin’ to say is he was about twenty seconds away from stickin’ his hand down my pants, 'til you came in.”

“James,” Gary hisses, blushing even deeper.

Oh.

Well, that does make more sense, doesn’t it? All the – the touching, and the looks, and the fucking giggles that Roy’s been having to put up with for months now from the two of them. It does make sense.

“I wouldn’t, Roy,” Jamie says, and Roy must be glaring because he still sounds scared, like he’s tiptoeing around him. “I wouldn’t hurt ‘im. You must know that.”

Gary lets out a little high pitched hum, then claps a hand over his own mouth when both Roy and Jamie snap their heads to him.

The glare Jamie shoots him, combined with Gary’s face being redder than Roy had thought humanly possible, tells him far more than he ever wanted to know.

“Nope!” he declares, pointing between the two of them, “not another word out of yous. Gary, the sentiment from earlier still stands – you’re one of my own and if Jamie hurts you – don’t make that noise again or I swear to God – if he hurts you emotionally, like, I’ll kill him. Now please, please can we all pretend this never happened and that I know a normal amount about what the two of you like to do in the bedroom, and by a normal amount I mean I know nothing. Okay?”

They both nod silently.

“Fine. I’m off to the pub, then. See you next week.”

#thank you for the prompt!!!#love the idea of gary being consensually manhandled. love even more the idea of him trying to explain that to roy #and roy going NOPE NOPE NOPE IM HAPPY FOR YOU BUT DONT TELL ME ABOUT YOUR KINKS. PLEASE.#carraville #drabbles

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