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#and lost my shit if a person called me anything like queen GOD YUCK)
hitchell-mope · 4 years
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(Third film. After “ready as I’ll ever be”. In the woods of Auradon)
Lonnie (on her cellphone to Elsa): thank you your majesty. See you soon. (She hangs up). Ok. So we got Agrabah, Arendelle and New Orleans on our side.
Dizzy: what about Auroria and Cinderellasburg?
Jane: you know it just occurred to me how stupid some of these names sound
Lonnie (shrugging): we didn’t name em. Auroria. Possibly. Cinderellasburg. I dunno. Remember it’s her son who’s the homicidal maniac.
Dizzy: true
(In Ben’s office the three villains are looking at smoking hole in the carpet where the king once was)
Maleficent: is he dead
Chad: I dunno. Never done this before. Just thought of what would hurt him and did that. Dunno where that ball came from
Adam: what exactly would hurt him.
Chad: I think it was something to do with you sir
Adam: well he did destroy my portrait. And you had better hope he’s not dead. If he is then he’ll be used as a martyr and the bastards will be even harder to subjugate.
Maleficent: oh don’t worry. The bodies scattered throughout the kingdom? They’re merely asleep. The wand won’t allow otherwise. And a rookie did perform it after al
Adam: so what next?
Maleficent: I need to hunt down the ember and hopefully capture my daughter. You two make sure that the boy isn’t found by his allies.
Chad: Roger
Adam: we are not on a walkie-talkie
Chad (hopefully): but we could be?
Adam: no. You still have your cell
Maleficent: and you have a telapthic link with me. Adieu gentleman
(She disappears into purple smoke)
Chad: ooh I almost forgot. Where’s Audrey
Adam: don’t know don’t care. She’s not important. And she’s thrown in her lot with the villain spawn. She’s not worth saving son
Chad: I did this for her. I need to tell her. She can finally be my queen
Adam: and if she doesn’t want to? Because your skin is peeling off on your cheek
Chad: then I’ll make her. I have the wand. A little trance and then we dance.
Adam: whatever you think is best. Prince Chad of Auradon
Chad: I like that name
(On the island Facillier Celia and the boys have just sat down for lunch)
Carlos: god I forgot how good your cooking was
Facillier: well I’m glad I can still do something for you children. Even if it isn’t much
Gil: this is more then enough sir
Jay: to be honest I kinda missed this. Running away from Jafar. Coming here. Playing arcade games. Having proper good and not glass lined stew. Thank you
Facillier: your very welcome Jay. I have two extra slices for the girls when they come back from their fathers. Would they be interested
Gil: Evie would
Carlos: mom won’t. Vegetarian. But dad probably wil. If not then 🎶more for me🎶.
Jay: I’m done. I’ll put them on the bikes. You go play some games.
Carlos: ahaha I don’t think so. Not after yesterday. I’m coming with you. Don’t even try to stop me
Jay: and miss out on quality time with you? What am I? And idiot? Don’t answer that, just assume the position
(Carlos happily jumps in Jay’s back and they leave the arcade. The silence doesn’t last long)
Jay (from outside): HOLY MOTHER OF FUCK!!!!
(Carlos scurries back in slightly out of breath)
Carlos: the Hook’s stole our bikes. Jay’s chasing them. How long do you think mom and Evie will be at their dads?
Facillier: I don’t know. Why do they want there bikes
Carlos: the blonde said something about revenge redemption and repentance
Facillier: shit
Carlos: what
Celia: Harry’s alive. And they know.
(Outside the sisters Hook are on the bikes and Jay is chasing them. The give him the slip and he takes a shortcut which ends with him crashing through the apartment of someone he knows)
Jay: good thing I can’t get hurt
Cassim: Jay?
Jay: Cassim? You moved?
Cassim: I’m squatting.
Jay: of course. When this is all over I’m coming back for you personally. I need my grandpa after all
Cassim: Aladdin adopted you?
Jay: yup.
Cassim: I’m glad. Now what the hell are you doing
Jay: the Hook bitches stole two of our bikes. Trying to get them back.
Cassim: then go son, go
(Jay teleports away from the apartment straight into the girls path. They crash into him, flip over and land in a pile of crates against the wall)
Jay: you know. I have it on good authority that this is where your brother landed last year. After my friend stabbed him in the dick
Cj: don’t speak his NAME!
(She screams and aims a knife at his throat. He holds her wrist stopping her in the process. There’s a cracking sound)
Jay: do you really think you can hurt me. (Harriet tries to att ack him but he sweeps her legs from under her, she land on her back and he puts a foot on her throat) both of you are just as pathetic as your brother. Now. Tell me (his eyes glow bright gold) why did you steal the bikes?
Harriet (slowly suffocating): Harry. He’s, he’s
Jay: he’s what?
(In hades lair mother and son have just finished their talk)
Harry (still in disbelief): he though she was a mermaid. Oh god the injuicetus of it all
Hades: the what
Harry: it’s not fair. I can’t be related to those. Hold on. Do I have magic?
Hades: I don’t know. You might be a Vernon. James, while very bloodthirsty and oh so confident
Harry: yuck
Hades: is 100% fully human. So I don’t know if you have it in you.
Evie: and besides what do you care if you’re half mermaid? Your owner is an octopus. You haven’t got a leg to stand on
Harry: ohoho neither does the king kid sister
Evie: don’t call me that you have NO RIGHT
Harry: if I have magic. I’ll be more powerful then you
Evie: oh you think so do you? You’re only half god. The rest of you is stanky part human. I’m half sorceress. Mal’s half dark fairy. We’re better then you. In every way shape and form.
(This is when “anything you can do” happens. After the song)
Mal: are you two quote finished? Only cause I really want to get home before the kingdom falls and my fiancé dies
Evie (scoffing): of course. It’s always about what you want. You don’t even care that I’m in a crisis
Mal: I’m sorry what was that?
Evie: oh nothing. As always you’re too wrapped up in your own crap to see I’m suffering
Mal: oh my apologies dear sister. But who’s god awful advice last year led to the deaths of sixteen members of the paparazzi?
Evie: you’re the one that lost control. And then tried to kill me.
Mal: I was pissed that Ben got kidnapped. I also tasered Harry in the neck and nearly crushed Gil’s aorta in a fit of magic induced psychosis. You’re not special
(At this point the guys speak simultaneously)
Harry: you did what to Gil?
Hadie: you killed sixteen people?
Hades: that explains the magical history tour
Mal: Uma tore out my own heart and made me put it back, we used the book to resurrect them and yes the attempted sororicide is what led to it
Hades: wow. And. After all that. You still want to help.
Mal (shrugging): I live there. I have to help. Who else will?
Hades: the authorities. I don’t get it. After everything you’ve been through. Your mother. The coronation. The whatever it was the news called it last year
Evie: the green cyclone. It a lot PR to get rid of. I should know. I was in charge of it
Hades: and now this boy your mother possessed. You’re not thinking about yourself when you really should. By all means. Be all who you think they need you to be. Or be none of it. You don’t owe them or this world a thing. You never did.
Mal: is that from man of steel?
Hades: possibly. We get a lot of old used up films here
Mal: I never really paid attention to the movie besides the two leads
Evie: OH MY GOD SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!
Mal: ...I think we need to talk. We can use your den right dad?
Hades: be my guest
Mal: thank you. CMON!
(She teleports Evie and her self to the den and seals the place)
Mal: now c’mon. Spill. Out with it
Evie: out with what?
Mal: the reason you’ve been pissy since the altercation we all had with Adam
Evie: I just...don’t...see...why you’re... ok with all this
Mal: oh?
Evie: he left us. With them. And I know he had his reasons. But they doesn’t excuse or lessen what he did. And I’m so...angry. That you seem fine with it. And it’s not fair. You have the height. More magic. The title. I love Doug and I can’t even say it to him. You’re the main character in this little soap opera that is our lives and I’m on the fringe of it all trying desperately to get a major part. But of course. Your story way isn’t it. And it’s always been like this. Ever since we were thirteen and I stabbed it in the leg. Got a quick hug from Carlos and he rushed straight into your arms and you punted next into the barrier. It’s irrational. And illogical. But I’m not a Vulcan. I have my own shit to sort out and it just feel like I’m constantly waiting out there for it to be my turn. I I.
(This is when “waiting in the wings happens”)
Mal: wow. And yet you’ve never tried out for choir
Evie: hey!
Mal: sorry. But seriously. You’ve been holding onto this whatever this is. For what? Ten years?
Evie: I hate that you’re right. I hate that you’re coining and I’m not. And I hate
Mal: you think I’m coping? I hate it too. I hate that he left us just as much as you do. But I do understand it. If I couldn’t be near Carlos I’d do whatever I could to keep him safe. Even if it meant ceasing all contact. And I know you’d do that for Dizzy and Gil would do that for the twins. I don’t like it but I understand it.
Evie: I guess.
Mal: ready to go back in now?
Evie: fine
(They go back to the main room only to seek new problem)
Harry (absolutely incensed): WHADYA MEAN I LOST A YEAR OF MY LIFE!
The sisters (unimpressed): this should be interesting
(At the arcade. The Hook sisters are ties back to back on the dinner table. Carlos is having a minor breakdown)
Carlos: woah woah wait. So you’re telling me. That the bastard that’s haunted my nightmares since I was eleven years old. Is the son of hades, Mal and Evie’s older brother. And you never THOUGHT TO TELL ANYONE
Harriet: why would we AAAAAAAAARGH
(Jay just flexed the cord binding the two sending an exceedingly painful electric shock through both of them)
Jay: yeah. You don’t get to talk to Carlos. Neither of you deserve to talk to Carlos.
Cj: we only require the presence of one.
Jay: English please
Gil: me. CJ’s talking about me. What do you want.
Cj: do you even care. Did you even think about them. All year long. You forgot them. Traitor
Gil (with more calmness then they deserve): I do care. I come here with my brother and our friends every Friday and I help with the relocation. As for Uma and Harry. They terrify me. They gave me the same look you’re giving me right now when I left. Uma wanted to get out of here, who wouldn’t, but when anything doesn’t go her way she turns cold and horrible. Harry, well, you know how he is. I loved them. And I know they loved me. But they terrify me. And you don’t terrify people you love. So no. I’m not the traitor. No matter what you say.
Jay: how long have you known?
Harriet: since Hadie brought him to the ship 19 1/2 years ago. I was three. I named him after meself.
Celia (unimpressed): huh inspired.
Harriet: if pa knew he had made it with a god who can take a lady’s form at will and sired a child in the process. Harry wouldn’t have lived to say his first words. And don’t either you dare say that it woulda been a good thing
Carlos (muttering): well
Harriet: SHUDDIT. It didn’t help. Father hated him. Insulted him. Tried to hurt him. It’s why I broke both his legs and poked out his eye. Everything I’ve ever done is to protect my brother and sister. And I’ll not have him be put at risk because his whore of a mother couldn’t keep her pissing mouth shut!
Jay (chuckling): I’m sorry have you MET your brother?
Harriet: yes. He’s an angel has a great respect for women. Would kill for his family. I raised him right
Jay: you raised a perverted overly violet ambiance is what you did
Carlos: I just hope that mom and Evie kill him before he gets here
(In the lair Harry’s having one of his patented meltdowns)
Harry: I remember HAHAHAHA I rememhahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHA
Evie: May I?
Hades: May you what?
(Evie walks up to her mortal older brother and slaps him around the face so hard he spins in perfect 360 and falls on his face slapped cheek landing on the floor painfully)
Harry: owwww
Mal: you’ve lost a year of your life. Big rotting whoop. You’re still nineteen
Harry: that’s even worse. I should still be young and beautiful
(The girls burst into hysterical laughter. So much so they actually start choking on air. Their brother is unimpressed)
Harry: so not only do you hate me. You think I’m ugly
Mal (trying very hard to keep a straight face): you are not a 12 year old girl and I am not your mother. So yes. Your hideously repulsive to me. More to the point. You’re nothing. You were born nothing. And god willing you’ll die nothing. You repulse me and everyone you know. The only reason our cousin ever kept you around is because she felt sorry for you
(Harry slaps her around the face. In turn she punches him in his face. Then uses magic to screw him up into a tiny little ball. And kicks him into the tv. After which he unfurls himself looking very much the worse for wear. This is when “you’re a mean one mister Hook” happens. After the song)
Evie: so you think we can leave him here as a moulding husk?
Mal (ruefully glancing at their father): I highly doubt it. The Samaritan here will probably heal him.
Evie: ooh idea time
Mal: yeah.
Evie: a repeat of last year. We take it hostage. And make Uma comply to our demands.
Mal: hmmmmm tempting. Can we still keep it beaten bloody and broken.
Hadie: ok this has been alluded to but I gotta know! What did he do. If he’s just in a different gang to you what could he have possibly done to make you hate him so much?
Mal: he attacked my son five years ago. He kidnapped my boyfriend and tried to throw him to sharks
Evie: he extorted my daughter for protection money. He fought my boyfriend last year
Harry: the dwarf stabbed me in the dick
The sister rotten: YOU DESERVE IT
Mal: he’s a foul vile disgusting little troglodyte who deserves eternal torment
Evie: he’s literally a bastard son of a bitch, father
Hades: somehow I think that was directed at me
Evie: ohoho if you’re ever going to be sure of anything in your too long life, be sure that every insult I currently have racing around in my brain is directed at you
Hades: thank you dear
Mal: we should get going
Evie: agreed
Mal: first though dad. Two questions. One. May I have the ember please? (He tosses it to her). Much obliged. Two. Come with us. Please?
Hades (looking guiltily ashamed): ah
Hadie: our dear old dad has barely left the lair. Yesterday’s incident was the first time he’s gone that far since
Evie: my second birthday. Of course
Hades: I’m sorry. I am so so sorry. I just. I can’t risk you, any of you, getting hurt because of me.
Mal (disappointedly): ah. Oh well. That’s fine. Long shot anyway. C’mon E. Wait.
Hadie: what’s wrong.
Mal: that (she points at Harry’s unconscious form). What’re we gonna do with it?
Evie: we’re gonna have to take him with us. A genuine hostage situation. If Uma tries anything. We threaten it’s life
Mal: I like those odds. (She conjures up a hair thin coil of rope and hogties Harry with it). There. That should do the trick
Hadie: doesn’t that hurt him
The sisters rotten: who cares?
(They leave the lair with the pirate railing behind like a deformed balloon. Once they’re at the arcade Evie stops Mal just before the dragon goes inside )
Evie: wait wait wait!
Mal: what what what?
Evie: ok. First of all. Uncalled for. Second of all. What do we tell the others about that?
(She points to Harry)
Mal: the truth
Evie: ok I know you have this “I don’t lie” policy, which is frankly bullshit, but sometimes lying is better
Mal: they’ll find out anyway. No use in letting it fester. C’mon
(They enter the arcade. And immediately notice the hook sisters chained up on the table)
Mal: hey guys. What’s going on?
Jay: they stole our bikes. Mine and Carlos’s bikes they were trying to find Pennywise
Harriet (happy cry/laughing): oh my god. You’re alive AAAARGH
Jay (holding the ignited and still burning chain): hush bitch.
Carlos: is it true mom?
Mal: yes.
Carlos: you and Evie I understand. But him. Dear god hades have some self respect
Evie: Hook thought she was a mermaid
Carlos: she?
Mal: Hades is Harry’s mother. Mine and Evie’s father. Harry’s mother
Carlos: huh, makes sense
Evie: in other news. I’m a day younger than Mal. The result of a rebound apparently
Mal: Maleficent left the morning after the wedding night.
Carlos (massaging the bridge of his nose): that’s a lot of information to get in thirty seconds
Mal: sorry hon.
Celia: what do we do now?
Jay: take all three of them hostage. If Uma tries anything. Off them one by one
Carlos Evie and Celia: agreed
Mal: Gil, buddy, you’ve not said anything yet. You ok?
Gil: how is he?
Facillier: he’s fine son. He’s preserved. Intact. He’s
Gil: is he still mad. About last year.
Cj: if he’s retained the sense Harriet taught him he’ll be mad as all get out
(The core four and Celia exchange a look that says “this explains so much)
Carlos: we’ve got to wake it up don’t we?
Mal: sadly yes. Jay you’re much more level headed than oh no...
(Her attentions turned to the tv where an emergency news report is airing. In Arendelle Elsa is preparing her leave)
Anna: how long are you gonna be gone?
Elsa: as long as my daughter needs me.
Anna: well then. Beat the bastards.
Elsa: oh believe me. I will.
(She takes her rucksack and teleports away to Auradon. She slams into a dome two hundwred miles from the castle and falls to the forest floor. Back on the island Hadie’s on his exercise bike. Hades however)
Hades: I made the right choice didn’t I? It’s not a good idea for me to go. So I shouldn’t. But I should. Bugger it. I don’t know. What do you think? What should I do
(Hadie hops off the exercise bike and faces his dad)
Hadie: what do you want me to say father? You did what you thought was best. I told you not to go try and give her the ember yesterday and look what happened. And now you’re asking me if you made the right decision? I can’t tell you that. Sorry but I can’t
Hades: I know. And don’t be sorry. It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have put you in that position. Oooh. Idea.
Hadie: what?
Hades: go with them. Protect them.
Hadie: really?
Hades: yeah. Iri...Mal has the ember
Hadie: oh but they still don’t like you
Hades: but Mal likes you
Hadie: good point. I better get ready then
Hades: HAHA!
(This is when “I’m so sorry” happens. After the song. In the arcade. The news caster is fear-mongering)
Newscaster: we don’t know what’s happening. The black smoke descends and leaves people unconscious. It is believed that a villain may have escaped the barrier after Hades’s attempt yesterday afternoon. The king is missing and lady Mal is nowhere to be fargh (he lets out a strangled scream as his heart is ripped out of his back. His face goes slack and he speaks with Maleficent’s voice) I know you are watching dear. So do me the courtesy of paying attention for a change. I know he gave you the ember. For some reason he took quite a shine to me so it would make sense that you are the favourite. Can not fathom why though. You are basically useless and very difficult to love. Anyway. Give me the ember at your earliest convenience and return to the isle with me and the toffs will live. Fail to do so. And I shall kill every last man women and child in Auradon until only tour pathetic little friends are left. And I will make you do away with them. Just know Maleficent Bertha that if you deny me what happens is your fault. You’d choice sweetie. (The heart is placed back into the mans chest) I’m sorry I don’t know what happened for a minute there urk
(His neck twists violently to the left and he falls down dead)
Mal: oh no. Oh nononononononono.....
(She enters a verbal cycle that only Jay notices. He switches off the tv and gets on the dinner table)
Jay: ok. EVERYBODY OUT. NOW
(Everyone hightails it outside and he sits down beside Mal on the floor)
Jay: it’s ok. You’ll be fine.
Mal: you don’t know that
Jay: I do. I do know that. You know how I know that? This sort of thing has happened to us so many times before. And you know what we do? We win. Every. Single. Goddamn. Time. And besides. You have the one thing Maleficent or chad will never have.
Mal: what? What do I have
Jay: you have me. You’ll always have me. I’m always gonna be there for you. Whatever happens. Be sure if this. I’m here for you
(This is when “I’ll be there for you” happens.)
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The Marshmallow Chronicles (Ch. 13: Hunting for Love)
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Author’s notes: Hi! Sorry this took so long! As I told a lovely anon, I had been working on it for a while and it was deleted so I had to recover from the frustration. 
Thanks to the people who like, reblog and/or comment. You guys are the reason I’ve kept going <3 Huge thanks to @starstruckzonkoperatorbat, @notoriouscs, @simplyaiden-blog, @snyggflicka, @asprankle, @speedyoperarascalparty, @mirivalencia, @mymandrake and @asobigokoro2018 for asking me to tag them!
Love you guys <3
Rating: T
Pairing: Drake x MC
Words: 5,943
Drake retired to his room early, not feeling up to enjoying the festivities. 
God, this sucks. I have to get this under control. Am I just gonna feel like shit all the time now?
Out of a sense of self-preservation he reflected he should probably keep his distance from Riley for the foreseeable future. He was shocked to realize that the thought of not being around her was more painful than seeing her with Liam. 
I guess I do want Adams to be a part of my life...
He flopped down unto his bed, trying to think of something that could distract him, when he felt his phone vibrate twice in his pocket. 
He pulled it out and read, “Hey, Drake! Where did you run off to?”
And then a separate message, “It’s Addams 😊”
His stomach did a somersault, seeing her call herself the nickname he called her. He’d already known it was her; Liam had given him her number “just in case”, as he put it, but Drake could never bring himself to text her. It would have felt like an even greater betrayal of Liam’s friendship. He had, however, spent more time than he cared to admit with his fingers hovering over the keyboard, staring at her picture and holding himself back from typing. 
“You know me, Addams, always sneaking off”
“Yeah, but you could’ve asked me to come with you ☹️“
Right, like she wasn’t having fun with Liam. 
He was wondering whether there was a way to phrase that so it was less obvious how bitter he was and then she texted again.
“You’re welcome btw”
“For what?”
He noticed she was already typing the moment he sent it. He was glad she didn’t play games with texting, didn’t wait long to reply, didn’t mind double-texting.
“For not making you my court jester! You would’ve looked cute in that cap tho lol”
“Funny. So why didn’t you?”
“Well, you only made that bet to motivate me”
The three dots were still on the screen so he waited. She seemed to be thinking especially hard about this text, as she took inordinately long typing it. Drake’s palms were sweating.
“And... tbh, as soon as they said a cup-bearer is someone you trust I knew I had to say you”
Drake was thankful he couldn’t choke or stutter through texts. He threw his phone on the bed and put his head under his pillow, completely overwhelmed. He couldn’t stop smiling, yet he felt close to tears at the same time. 
Pull it together, man.
He took a few breaths to steady himself and grabbed his phone. He caught a glimpse of his dopey smile reflected on his phone’s dark screen before he unlocked it. 
“You’re making me blush, Addams”
“You’re going soft on me, Drake ;)”
“Hey, thanks. I trust you too”
“No prob, I’ll have plenty of chances to beat your ass lol”
He could practically see her smirk.
“Ha, we’ll see about that”
“Well, I'd better go to bed, my alarm clock is waaay too chipper in the mornings”
“Is being queen even worth Maxwell waking you up every day?”
“I’m starting to doubt it haha”
He knew she was kidding, but he still couldn’t help the stupid, senseless hope he felt at that.
She texted once more, “Thanks for everything, Drake, I mean it. See you tomorrow?”
“Any time :) see you tomorrow”
He set his alarm for the next morning feeling a little more optimistic. That was it, he just had to find the right balance with Riley. He could give her a break, for starters. Since his feelings would not be ignored, he could use them to be nicer and act like a real friend to her, for a change. Yes, instead of wallowing in his unrequited crush, he would try to grow and improve through this. 
With this in mind, he turned the lights off and went to sleep.
The next day he got up unusually early, determined to be a better version of himself. He started by finding Liam, who was enjoying a rare quiet moment in the stables.
“Hey, Liam!”
“Drake! This is a pleasant surprise! What brings you here so early?”
“I don’t know, we haven’t hung out in a while and I thought...” he trailed off. 
I really have to get better at this friendship thing.
Liam looked touched, so much so that Drake felt his embarrassment grow.
“I’d like nothing better! How are you? Any news of Savannah?”
“Nothing. Radio silence. And her trail’s gone cold so...” he sighed.
Liam put a supportive hand on his shoulder, “Listen, if there’s anything I can do, all you have to do is ask. I’ve asked Bastien to look into it, but he seems to have a lot on his plate lately.”
“Oh, so it’s not just me?”
“That he’s been short with?”
“Short? More like a dick! Do you know he yelled at me yesterday for no reason?”
Liam raised a skeptical eyebrow, “No reason?”
“Okay, so I teased him a little but Liam, I swear, it was nothing compared to the pranks we used to pull on him!”
Liam chuckled. “Remember when we locked him out of the training room?”
“Or when we put those balloons behind the door?” Drake snorted.
“He was so startled when they popped he pulled out his gun!”
“Yeah, in retrospect I can see how that was actually pretty dangerous and not super fun for him,” admitted Drake, though he was still chuckling.
“It was very irresponsible,” agreed Liam. “We should really show him some sort of appreciation soon, especially if he is under pressure.”
“Good idea, but you should leave that to me; you’ve got enough shit to do.”
“Do I? Other than choosing a queen for Cordonia and my lifelong partner, my schedule is wide open,” Liam joked.
They heard footsteps getting nearer and Drake peeked out to see King Constantine approaching the stables. That’s my cue.
“I’d better take Morello, then.” He strode to one of the stalls, where a jet black horse whinnied excitedly. “Hey, boy.” He led him gently outside, grabbing a saddle on his way back to Liam. “Well, if there’s any way I can help you, just say the word.” Drake clapped his back.
“I know, Drake, thank you.”
Drake waved goodbye and exited, his horse walking behind him. He briefly stopped to give the King a perfunctory bow. He ambled around the grounds, at peace for the first time in what seemed like ages. He’d missed Liam’s company. He was used to long periods of only seeing each other for quick conversations, but lately, his once-easy friendship had felt anything but. Now, with a clearer mind and knowing what he intended to do about his silly crush, it all seemed as simple as it used to be. 
In a secluded spot, he saddled Morello. He caressed its muzzle and the horse nickered affectionately. “I missed you, too, buddy. It’s been busy around here, you know? Busier than usual. New people and everything.”
He scratched behind its ears, lost in thought. He looked back towards the stables and saw most of the group already mounted. “All right, seems like everyone’s on their horses. You ready?” 
Morello neighed, which Drake took as a yes. He swung expertly onto his saddle and took the reins. “Now listen, if there’s ever been a time when we gotta look good, it’s this one, okay?”
The horse snorted and Drake patted its neck. 
Nothing wrong with trying to impress the suitors. It’s not like I’m making a move or anything. I just want her to know I’m good at something.
He directed Morello at a slow gait toward the others. He’d decided to stay in the back, should anyone need any help. 
Nobles don’t tend to be good at much. 
He smiled a little, remembering when Tariq had gotten his foot tangled in the stirrup a few years ago and sighed contentedly. 
Yeah, today might be a good day.
He saw Riley up ahead and had already raised his hand to urge Morello forward with the reins, then thought better of it. 
You’ll go up to her if it’s natural. Stop forcing it.
He settled in the last spot. After a few minutes of riding at a ridiculously slow pace, his gaze started drifting more and more often towards Riley, until he was fully staring at her. 
I’m such a creep. 
Try as he might, though, he couldn’t help looking at her, the shapes her lips made when she talked or smiled, how beautifully her hair moved in the breeze... 
I’m gonna make myself sick.
She was currently having what looked like a surprisingly civil conversation with Olivia. 
Yuck. She’s such a better person than I am.
A few minutes later, Hana was the one to approach her.
Lovesick idiots that we are. 
He shook his head fondly at Hana. 
God, I hope you come out of this better than me, kid.
Hana moved back to talk to the rest of the suitors. At the same time, Drake noticed Lady Kiara trying to catch his eye and ignored her as politely as he could. 
Out of desperation – fine, and also because I really, really want to talk to her – he called out to Riley, “Addams!”
She turned towards him, grinning. He returned her smile and waved her over. She immediately slowed down and let others pass her until she was at the back with Drake. He was pleasantly surprised at how well she commanded her horse. 
Okay, here we go. Friends. We’re gonna be friends.
“There you are. You look like you actually know how to ride a horse.” 
That’s something a friend would say, right?
One of Riley’s hands flew to her mouth in mock surprise. “Oh my gosh, opening with a compliment?”
“Careful, don’t want you falling off your horse now.” Drake smirked, though he still regarded her uneasily. 
Friends worry about their friends!
“I’m surprised you’re out here with all the nobles today.” It was phrased like a statement, but there was a question behind it. 
Well, obviously the truth is out of the question. 
“Turns out, I had an opening in my schedule today.” He grinned. “And there’s something oddly satisfying about watching nobles fuss over their stuffy blazers.”
Riley giggled. “Is this why you’re not frowning... as much as usual, anyway.”
Drake didn’t know whether to shake her or kiss her. 
It’s you! You’re the reason! Okay, how do I make that friend-appropriate? 
“It has more to do with the company I keep.” That was probably the most sincere he’d been in the past year.
“A second compliment!” This time, Riley didn’t pretend to be shocked, she actually was. Her eyes shone as she looked at Drake, delighted.
“One more and you win the jackpot,” he winked. 
If only I could actually give her anything.
“I hope it’s all your whiskey,” she teases.
It was Drake’s turn to act horrified. She pushed his shoulder and he smiled with a sigh.
“You know, when we first met, I wanted to dislike you so badly...” He was not sure why he was saying this. 
I guess I want our friendship to start on a clean slate.
Riley’s eyes were wide. “You WANTED to dislike me? Why?”
Of course she finds it unbelievable that anyone could dislike her, cocky jerk. 
He smiled to himself.
“You were crashing Liam’s bachelor party! It was supposed to be our last night out together before all of this... We’ve always been like brothers, doing everything together...” He thought of that morning, how spending a few minutes with him had felt like a privilege. 
“Now I’m lucky to see him for five minutes without a noble girl throwing herself in front of him,” he finished bitterly. 
After a moment of silence, he realized she might think he meant her and hurriedly apologized, “Sorry. I didn’t mean...”
She put her hand on his for a second, her eyes understanding, “I know what you meant.”
Drake could not comprehend how the smallest of her gestures could calm him, make him feel better, like he mattered. 
I have to stop getting so pathetically emotional over every little thing she does. 
He cleared his throat. “Anyway, I know we got off to a bad start, but somewhere along the way... things changed.” 
Okay, stop it right there or you might go too far. 
“Hell, Addams, I don’t even know why I’m telling you any of this.” He rubbed a hand on his face, embarrassed at this outpouring of honesty.
Riley spoke, “Drake, I wanted to dislike you too.”
He looked up from his hands, taken by surprise, although he had no reason to be. “You did?”
“Yeah, I mean, you were a total jerk to me!” 
Understatement of the year.
“But now...”
Drake hated how his voice practically trembled with hope, “Now?”
“It took time... but I figured out that you’re actually human under all those scowls,” she poked him.
Of course. She barely even sees me as a friend, how could I have thought... Well, it doesn’t matter, being friends is already more than I deserve after the way I treated her.
He spotted Liam with his parents ahead. 
There’s someone else I need to be better to.
“This has all been touching, but I need to rescue Liam from his family for a couple minutes.”
He heard Riley utter a small “Oh” as he rode ahead, and felt a twinge of guilt coupled with that insufferable emotion he’d been feeling constantly as of late, hope.
He reached them just in time to hear Queen Regina sing the praises of Madeleine, much to Liam’s apparent chagrin.
“Do you see what I am saying, Liam? Wouldn’t you agree that she is the superior choice?”
“She would certainly make an excellent monarch, son,” chimed in the King.
“She is a lady with many merits, yes,” replied Liam diplomatically.
“So is she the suitor you are most leaning towards, then?” prodded the Queen.
“I–I...”
“Liam!” Drake called, startling the three monarchs, who had been so absorbed in their conversation they had not noticed his arrival. “Wanna race ahead?”
“Loser does 30 push-ups!” Liam exclaimed, already urging his horse forward.
Liam was, of course, an accomplished rider. There really weren’t any rich people things you could afford to be bad at when you were a royal. However, Drake had spent more time in the stables than he had. And so, despite Liam’s exceptional instruction, he didn’t share the bond that Drake and Morello did. 
All this to say, by the time Liam caught up with him, Drake had time to pretend to be looking at an imaginary watch on his wrist.
“Liam, Liam, Liam,” he said, with shakes of his head. “You’ve really got me to thank for your abs, you know that, right?”
Liam chuckled. “That’s my secret; I lose on purpose so I can stay in shape.”
Drake snorted. “You keep telling yourself that, buddy.”
“Drake, thanks for that.” Liam’s relief was palpable.
Drake sobered. “No problem. You looked like you’d rather be at the bottom of the canyon so...”
Liam gave a humorless laugh. “Not quite, but almost. I don’t think they understand that I’m conflicted enough as it is.”
Drake perked up at this, “Are you? I... thought it was a done deal. That you were choosing Riley, that is.”
Liam shushed him. “Not so loud!” He ran his fingers through his hair. “What can I say? In my heart, it is, but unfortunately that is not nearly enough.”
Drake’s heart sank. 
Even if he doesn’t choose her, he’s in love with her. And he’s your best friend.
“Stop worrying so much, man, what’s that gonna do? Look, let’s just enjoy the feast today, huh? You still have a few events left to decide. Not to mention a Beaumont party to look forward to!”
“I’ll try. Although I must say, I am definitely looking forward to that! Their parties are really unparalleled.”
“That they are.”
He and Liam rode on in companionable silence until they reached the mountain village. It was charming and rustic, with its little cabins and huts surrounding a vast filed in which long tables had been set out, laden with food.
Once everyone had gathered round, King Constantine welcomed them, “Everyone, we’ve reached our hunting lodges. Our forebears would dine on the day’s hunt here, and though we no longer hunt, we will still have a great feast. But first, we race to celebrate our ancestors. The first to reach Prince Liam will be served first at the feast! Begin!”
Drake was torn between wishing he could participate – he was starving – and excitement at seeing the suitors race and possibly make a fool out of themselves. Except Hana, obviously. And Riley, he hoped... though that would provide an incredible opportunity to tease her.
No. Friends don’t want their friends to look dumb. 
He needn’t have chided himself, for Riley did well. She didn’t win – predictably, it was Hana who did – but she did a good job for her first time, in Drake’s opinion.
An image popped up in his mind, uninvited, of himself teaching Riley how to ride properly. They were all smiles and laughter... 
Stop it, brain.
He forced himself to concentrate on what King Constantine was saying, “That’s superb horsemanship in action. Servants, prepare the first plate for Lady Hana. Now, then. Let’s all take some time to rest. Dinner will begin shortly.”
The crowd broke into smaller, more relaxed groups. He dismounted Morello and tied him to the hitching rail where all the other horses were drinking water and chewing on oats or grazing. He saw Riley talking to Tariq, weirdly. Liam was engaged in conversation with Olivia – no, thanks – and then he spotted Maxwell and Hana.
“Congratulations, Hana! That was some riding,” he admired as he approached them.
“Yeah, you kicked ass!” Maxwell agreed enthusiastically.
She blushed, “Thank you. I am glad I could put something my parents made me learn to use. If only to eat first.” 
“I think that’s the best prize you could get, I’m starving! Right, Maxwell?”
Maxwell was looking out at Riley, who was talking to Liam, with an uncharacteristically pensive expression on his face.
Drake waved a hand in front of his face. “Maxwell? Everything okay, man?”
“Wha–? Oh. Yeah, yeah, everything’s fine.”
“Sure.” Drake eyed him suspiciously and shared a puzzled look with Hana, who broke the tension.
“Why don’t we go see what they’re up to?” 
The three of them walked over to Liam and Riley. Liam was, as Drake had come to expect, smiling widely, completely engrossed in whatever Riley was saying.
“Hey, the feast is being put out.” Drake pointed out when they’d joined the pair.
“And they’ve got dishes supposedly blessed by the spirits of the nearby ruins,” Maxwell informed them.
Hana’s face instantly lit up. “Oooh! I’ve heard legends about those ruins! They sound magical. People travel from all around just to see them.”
“It’s a shame we’re not scheduled to see them,” Liam frowned.
Thank God! Bunch of old rocks.
Hana’s face fell as fast as it had brightened before. “We aren’t? I was so hoping to...”
Maxwell put a comforting arm around her shoulders and suggested, “Why don’t we just go anyway? Sounds like a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity!”
A once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to miss out on delicious food, maybe. 
“Are you sure we should?” Hana asked, cautiously eager.
No!
“It’d be nice to spend some time together without this crowd around,” Liam said. As always, he turned directly to Riley and asked, “What do you say, Riley?”
Riley had that familiar mischievous look she got when she was ready to break the rules. “Let’s have an adventure!”
Drake came close to protesting this decision, until he noticed that her face was practically glowing with excitement. 
Fiiine, I’ll go. Crushes are so stupid. 
He shook his head at himself but kept quiet, not wanting to spoil the others’ fun.
“Alright!” Maxwell fist-pumped.
“I’m excited to visit another piece of Cordonian history,” gushed Hana.
Liam took the lead and gestured for them to come. “Follow me. I know how to get there.”
They walked away from the crowded field and into the adjacent forest. At least this I can enjoy. Drake took in the lush trees, the leave-strewn path they were following and the mysteriously soothing sounds of nature surrounding them. He tried to see if he could spot any forest creatures, but aside from a few shuddering bushes, he didn’t see any; they had probably been spooked by the humans’ presence.
He breathed in deeply, feeling a bit better, despite the hunger. He realized he’d been walking next to Maxwell, who had been quiet the whole time. 
What the hell?!
“Hey, Maxwell, you know I’m not buying that ‘everything’s fine’ bullshit, right?”
“What? Why? Everything is–”
“Stop it. Tell me what’s wrong.”
Maxwell sighed. “Okay. I need someone’s opinion on this, anyway. You know how I’m sponsoring Riley?”
“You can skip the intro, Maxwell, I am the same guy who’s been here for everything,” Drake rolled his eyes.
“Yeah, sorry.” Maxwell was cracking his knuckles nonstop at this point. Drake grabbed his arms and forced him to stop.
“What is it? It can’t be that bad.”
“It’s not bad, it’s complicated. Riley might not be sure about this whole thing anymore.”
Maxwell looked so conflicted that Drake put an arm around his shoulders and said, “Well, being queen is a big deal, dude! Don’t worry, I’m sure she’ll come around!”
“It’s not that. Or at least, not just that. It’s... it’s Liam, too.”
Drake almost stopped walking and had to remind his feet to keep going.
Maxwell kept talking and Drake listened to him half-heartedly. “So I don’t know what to because on the one hand, she’s my friend now. I don’t want to force her to do anything she doesn’t want to! Especially something so big! And I know she feels pressured... I mean, who wouldn’t, with Bertrand? But on the other hand, House Beaumont desperately needs a win, now more than ever... er, for no particular reason.”
Drake was busy trying to calm his buzzing thoughts. 
She’s not sure about Liam! Could it be that–? 
No. There’s no way it’s because of you!
You can’t know that!
So what? Even if it is, you think she’s gonna give up a kingdom? 
His internal argument was interrupted by Maxwell taking a huge breath and continuing, “And then there’s Liam; he really, really likes her and he probably thinks she likes him back and I know it’s not my place to tell him but I feel terrible.”
Right. Liam. You couldn’t do that to your best friend, either way.
There was no argument there.
“Drake? Are you going to say anything or...?”
“Oh, uh, yeah! I don’t think there’s that much to say except, Addams is going to choose whatever she chooses, okay? Even if Bertrand is pressuring her, she’ll do whatever she wants; she’s stubborn like that,” he smiled fondly. “And I guess you gotta trust that she knows.”
“Knows what?”
“Well, that she understands both the reason you brought her here in the first place and that you��re her friend. I’m sure she’ll do whatever she can to help House Beaumont and be happy. She’s one of those people that always finds a way, you know what I mean?”
“I do and I hope you’re right.”
“Psh, when am I not?”
Maxwell pushed him away. “When you said I wouldn’t dare ask the Queen to breakdance with me.”
Drake snorted, “You got me there. I underestimated how inappropriate you can be. And this is from a commoner.”
“I still think she secretly wanted to.”
“Right, maybe she just needed a few more glasses of champagne. Why don’t you try again at the next Beaumont party?”
“Don’t think I won’t.”
They spent the rest of the way laughing and coming up with stupid plans to get the Queen to breakdance.
“Here we are,” Liam announced from ahead of them.
The group moved forward out of the trees and into a clearing. Imposing, mossy stone ruins littered the place, most of them unrecognizable as buildings after so long.
“It’s so beautiful and serene,” Hana breathed out.
Without distractions, Drake’s hunger had returned with a vengeance. “Yep... sure are a bunch of old things here,” he shrugged.
Liam shook his head at him. “It’s so much more than that. There’s something so calm about this place. Can’t you sense it?”
They stood there for a few seconds, their own silence swallowed by the noises made by thousands of bugs and other small critters accustomed to their solitude.
As he’d come to expect, Maxwell broke their silence first, “The only thing I sense is about a million snakes and probably a couple of rock monsters getting ready to attack us.”
Hana’s eyes widened. “Rock monsters? Do you have any rock monsters in Cordonia?”
“It was a joke... just forget it.” Maxwell sighed in defeat.
“I want to find some ghosts,” said Riley, putting her arms up in a “spooky” stance.
“Ghosts?” Hana looked worried, again.
“Maybe one will tell me my future,” piped up Maxwell
That’s not how ghosts work.
“Or devour your soul,” Drake replied in a creepy voice.
Riley shot him a look, “Drake.”
He smiled at her and shrugged. “I’m just saying, that is the likelier outcome!”
“Since some of us,” said Riley pointedly, “seem determined not to take this seriously, why don’t we split up? That way we can all explore however we want.”
“Or not explore,” grumbled Drake.
Riley rolled her eyes at him.
They went their separate ways. Too hungry to be curious, Drake found a rock that looked like it might be halfway comfortable and slumped against it. 
Hana’s already quiet footsteps were further muffled by the leaves and dirt, so he jumped when she addressed him, “Hi, Drake.”
“Hana! You scared the crap outta me!”
She giggled, “Sorry! I didn’t mean to.”
“Yeah, well, next time clear your throat or something.”
“Understood.” 
She slumped – somehow making it look graceful – next to him. 
“So how are you?”
“Same old. Acting like a dumb teenager with a crush, you?”
“Me too... although I never got to be a ‘dumb teenager’ so I wouldn’t know.”
“What are you gonna do about it? I just... I have no idea how to act or what to say or not to say.”
“I don’t think I’ll do anything about it at all. I am here as a suitor and that is something I must keep in mind. Not only that, but she’s my best friend... I don’t think I am prepared to risk our friendship.”
“Well, at least you have some sort of claim, you know? She’s your best friend. I’m... what? Her boyfriend’s best friend?” He scoffed.
They settled into a gloomy silence until Drake spoke again. “For what it’s worth, I don’t think you’d be risking your friendship. If she doesn’t... feel the same way, I’m sure she’ll understand.”
Hana thought about it for a long moment. “You may be right. I’m not certain I’ll have the courage, though.”
“Are you kidding? You came here from so far away and you’ve tried so many new things; of course you do! You have more guts that Liam, Maxwell and I combined. With Addams you might be evenly matched,” he chuckled.
Hana smiled. “Thank you, Drake. I only wish there was a way this could end favorably for everybody.”
Drake didn’t think that needed an answer. They all wished that. Hana patted his shoulder and left as quietly as she’d come.
Almost as soon her barely audible footsteps receded, Drake heard somebody else approach.
“Hey, Addams,” he greeted her.
She stood in front of him. “You look like you’re having a good time exploring,” she said with an arched eyebrow.
Drake grimaced. “Archaeology isn’t really my thing.” 
Plus, I’m fucking hungry. Bordering on hangry.
“You could at least look around.” Riley gestured at the ruins. “It’s not like you come here often.”
“I looked around. There’s some old buildings. That’s about it.”
What happened to being friendlier, dammit?
“Hmm...” Riley considered what he’d said as if he’d actually made and interesting point instead of just sarcastic whining. 
“Don’t you want to know where you come from? And what about insight into how people lived long ago?” 
She sounded so fascinated it was almost enough to get Drake interested. Almost. “They could’ve ridden dragons for all I care. It doesn’t mean much now.” 
There’s enough shit going on in the present, and shit to worry about in the future. Why look at the past?
He could see Riley was getting tired of his attitude. 
Hell, so am I. 
She put her hands on her hips. “So why did you come out here if you don’t really care for these sorts of things?”
Because you looked adorably excited about it? 
As had become common for him, he went with a different version of the truth, “I don’t think we’re going to get many more times like this.”
Riley tilted her head, “Like what?”
“I mean... Liam is going to be king soon.” He swallowed painfully. “And you could very well be his queen. Everything’s going to change.” He bit the inside of his cheek and looked down. What was he going to do the day of the Coronation if he could barely handle the thought?
To his surprise, Riley’s next words were, “You know, you’re right.” 
He looked up to see a fierce look on her face, “We don’t need to associate with the riff-raff. I mean, really, what could you even provide for us? A sense of grounding and humility?”
Drake shook his head but couldn’t help smiling a little. “I see what you’re trying to do here. It’s not going to work.”
“Or maybe someone to sneak us out of the palace? Why would we want that when we’re drinking champagne and shaking ambassadors’ hands?”
She sounds so sure. There’s no way Maxwell’s right, he probably misunderstood. She’s gonna be queen. 
His stomach clenched and he had to make an effort to focus on their back and forth.
“Yeah, yeah. Keep on punching down.”
Riley’s voice softened and she stepped closer. “Or maybe we’ll need a reminder that no matter how tough someone may seem on the outside, there’s a big, lovable softie on the inside.”
“Hey!”
She put her hands on both his shoulders and gave him a goofy smile. “Come on, Drake. There’s a smile inside you somewhere.”
Drake gave up and smiled with a laugh. “You’re the worst, Addams.”
“Would you have me any other way?”
She’s gonna make me say something I’ll regret if she keeps asking those questions. Fuck no, I wouldn’t have you any other way. You’re amazing.
“Addams... We may have had some ups and downs between us, but I want you to know that I’ve enjoyed this little adventure with you. Not just the ruins, but the whole thing since I walked into your bar in New York.” 
He looked her straight in the eyes and tried to say something nice in the least romantic way possible. “You’re... you’re not bad.”
Riley seemed more moved by that than he’d expected. 
Maybe she understands I mean so much more than that. 
“Awww, Drake, I care for you too.”
Goddamn. I care so fucking much and I can’t stop.
“Addams... I...”
Don’t say anything. Think of Liam.
He shook his head and sighed. He let himself meet her eyes; there was such an intense, yet soft look in them. He felt his gaze slowly make its involuntary way down to her lips. He couldn’t remember wanting anything as badly.
“You’re something else...” he choked out. 
He heard her inhale sharply through her lips. She blushed, breaking their eye contact and putting her arms down.
I went too far.
“Now, we really need to get you out of here before you completely lose it.” The conversation was light-hearted again. “All this reflecting isn’t healthy for you.”
“You’re right. If I stay much longer, I might melt into a big ball of mush,” he shuddered. He had to stop putting himself in these situations; he’d come so close to saying or doing something he shouldn’t...
“Let’s go find the others.” He started walking towards the edge of the forest without looking back. Everyone else was already there.
“That was lovely,” said Liam.
“There weren’t any ghosts,” Maxwell complained.
“Why are you sad about that?” Hana seemed to grow more confused by Maxwell the more she knew him.
He shrugged, “I don’t know, I’m kind of curious what a ghost would have to say. Would’ve made a good story.”
“You can always lie. I’ll back you up,” offered Drake.
“There’s an idea!” he exclaimed.
Unexpectedly, Riley wrung her hands nervously, “Maxwell, please don’t tell me any ghost stories.”
“I won’t tell it to you. You’ll be a supporting character in the story.” 
“Do I survive?” she asked with hope.
“No.”
“Aww...”
“Hah,” Drake mocked her.
Maxwell put an arm around Riley and reassured her, “Drake is the first to die, though.”
“Hey!”
Liam chuckled along with everyone but Drake, and then said, “Alright, everyone. It’s time to head out.”
Riley took one last look at the ruins, sounding resigned, “These ruins were bigger than I thought.”
“Could’ve used an open bar in my opinion,” muttered Drake.
Maxwell, who apparently was almost as hungry as Drake, urged them on, “The feast is waiting for us back at the village! Let’s go!”
“That’s the best idea you’ve ever had. Including sponsoring Addams,” said Drake, earning him a push from Riley.
The walk back to the field seemed much longer to Drake, eager as he was for something to eat. 
When they eventually reached the banquet tables, he was relieved to find them still heaping with food; he’d been anxious it would all be gone by the time they returned.
“Wow... That’s a lot of meat!” Riley’s mouth was watering as she looked at the many cloches piled with different types of roasted meats.
“It’s not exactly a feast without it.” Drake said this as he loaded his plate with everything he could reach.
“A little more fruit couldn’t hurt,” Hana murmured, eyeing the comparatively few options a little sadly.
“I wouldn’t mind putting a bunch of fruit on a stake and waving it around like a sword.” Maxwell was already looking around the tables, trying to find something stake-like.
“Alright, let’s grab our food before Maxwell gets any other crazy ideas,” Drake interrupted.
Maxwell spotted a watermelon and grinned. “And then I could wear a watermelon as a helmet...” He smirked. “I’d be unstoppable.”
Drake had to forcibly remove Maxwell from the table before he could carry out any of his plans. Riley got him a bit of everything – except for watermelon – and brought both her and Maxwell’s plates to where Liam and Hana were already sitting. 
Maxwell revealed a champagne bottle he’d managed to swipe from the table before Drake took him away. 
“I’ll go get glasses!” Hana volunteered, and darted to the table to get five of them.
Maxwell popped the champagne and poured some for everyone. He then stood up and raised his glass.
“A toast to all of us and to our friendship!”
“To friendship!” chirped Hana.
“Ugh... to friendship,” agreed Drake reluctantly. 
It’s only all I’ve thought about today.
Liam smiled at them all and said, “To friendship.”
“To friendship!” exclaimed Riley.
They clinked their glasses and drank. 
Damn, if I didn’t get lucky with these people.
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