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curious-minx · 3 years

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Left Behind In The Halloween Parade: Late Review of Bob’s Burgers And The Simpsons.

The First Sunday of November, and the Last Sunday of the Trump and Biden election, found Hulu finally uploading the Bob’s Burgers and Simpsons Halloween episodes. So in the spirit of taking your sweet ass time that is exactly what I did with this review. The Bob’s Burgers Halloween episode is probably the weakest of the series, a series that is practically a Hallmark card company in terms of the amount of holiday-inspired content they have churned out. Episode “Heartbreak Hotel-oween” isn’t a particularly offensive in any way it just fails to live up to Halloween episodes such as my personal favorites Season 8 “The Wolf of Wharf Street,” which remains one of the most visually stunning episodes of the series, and Season 4, the series’ second Halloween episode,“Fort Night,” which has incredibly gruesome stakes and the most satisfying entry in the Louise versus Millie feud.

“Heartbreak Hotel-oween” is still ultimately pretty good and though it took a second viewing to fully appreciate it I do like watching the Belcher children deftly sail through the world of adults. The tantalizing plot thread of a Bob’s Burgers Delivery service is dangled and I would like to see more Delivery based plots. Getting these characters into different areas and expanding upon the ambitious Jersey shore town. Having the kids deliver a burger to an older woman using the burger as a lure for her seance is flattened against a brown and forgettable after thought of a hotel. Everything with the Belcher kids is good and interesting and with the help of Andy Daly voicing the Hotel Manager; Lindsey Stoddart doing Quarantine duty and voicing multiple characters including the old woman Dolores conducting the seance, and Loren Bouchard Home Movies collaborator Melissa Robbins stops by as a bystander character as well.

The episode starts getting in its own way with the adults blood bank centric B-plot. The entire plot is given in a single exchange with Teddie being excited about donating blood and everyman Bob with his everyman O-negative blood finds giving blood nauseating and gross. That’s it. That’s the whole plot and besides the blood banker workers being dressed up as vampires there are no other comedic games being played and it is total unmemorable fluff, which has been a common issue for the ongoing series. One thing this episode does right is at least get Bob, Linda and Teddie out of the restaurant and into a new environment. A lot of the verbal exchanges between Bob, Linda and Teddie feel a lot more stilted due to Covid recordings and the lack of non-scripted banter is sorely missed. I have noticed this season having more John H. Benjamin monologue Bob by himself moments, which only work when Bob’s imagination is in full flight. Where was the talking bag of Bob’s blood? Hell I wouldn’t even had objected to hearing a dang song sung by the vampires to help soothe Bob into giving blood or something beyond: Bob doesn’t like giving blood because it makes him woozy, he gives blood and get’s woozy.

Overall this is a perfectly serviceable episode: three Ghost-baiting cheeseburgers out of five.

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Intermission.

Fox is certainly using the Loren Bouchard & Molyneux sisters brand like a blood bag with the recent announcement of the new series The Great North. Wendy Molyneux is a frequent writer, (executive) story editor since Bob’s Burgers inception. She is the writer of “The Wolf of Wharf Street” and the episode of Bob’s Burgers I have watched the most - “There's No Business Like Mr. Business Business,” because I am a cat fanatic, John Oliver fan, and have been the pet companion of a standard poodle exactly like Snoodle named Faust that I love dearly. Basically, I am excited for this show. Molyneux is also a deeply connected collaborator with Megan Mullally writing on all 74 episodes of Mullally’s forgotten by the ages The Megan Mullally Show. A show according to Wikipedia’s citation of Fox News, “viewers were disappointed to find out that Megan is not anything like Karen in real life,” and if there is any white woman out there that is an anti-Karen it is Mullally. Mullally is not the focus of the show but her more visible and commercially accessible husband Nick Offerman is finally being anointed into the annals of TV Dads. With his three sons voiced by Paul Rust, Will Forte and National Treasure Aparna Nancherla and sole daughter voiced by Bob’s Burgers alum Jenny Slate, who recently honorably stepped down from a lucrative tv series Big Mouth deal like the real champ that she is. Mullally will show up as Jenny Slate’s character’s boss andThe cast is undeniable the backdrop of Alaska has a lot of promise for elaborate or interesting set pieces. I am ready for this show! Will this be Bob’s Burgers Futurama? That’s probably a vicious hex based on how Futurama was infamously jerked around by Fox. FOX has already given the show a promising two-season deal, which is already a lot better than what Netflix did for Tuca and Bertie. Faint nowhere discussions of the Bob’s Burgers movie were also mentioned in an interview with Bouchard who has a cantankerous “theater release only” policy, which bums out a little, but I would much prefer they take as long as possible. The Bob’s Burgers movie cannot end up carrying out the Simpson movie curse.

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I am no Simsons scholar. I could not give you an active ranking of favorite Tree House of Horror episodes. I could tell you that I really like Bart as an Edgar Allen Poe’s Raven. You don’t need to be Simpsons scholar to safely state that “Treehouse of Horror XXXI” should be ashamed to show its “funny face.” For starters the entire appeal of the anthology style of storytelling has been completely deflated by having two of the previous episodes in this season being gimmicky non-standard episodes. The only positive thing I can say about this episode is that it is an important teaching tool for what the most broken and shittiest, laziest satire imaginable would look like and the 2020 Election cold opening is actually pretty solid. All of the good will earned by the strong opening is completely squandered starting with an inexplicably CGI Toys Story sketch. I am assuming the animation department went with CGI because the source material is CGI. The CGI is really bad and makes me really miss the 3D models of Simpsons Hit And Run and perfectly charming The Simpsons Game. Instead this sketch’s particular animation looks like the animators were most inspired not by Pixar’s clean and craftsmen like CGI models but were going for more of a Fanboy & Chum Chum look. A Toy’s Story parody in this day and age is asinine in its laziness, but it’s still an evergreen territory. A good Toy’s Story parody is possible, but simply having Bart play out the role of Toy Story’s Sid except he gets lobotomized by his own toys. I did appreciate the writer’s making the explicit moral of the story to not buy toys, which for a Disney product like the Simpsons is pretty rich.

Behold! The last recorded instance of a quality Toys Story satire from China, IL

The next two parodies go down slightly better simply because they aren’t sporting that eye bleeding animation but paying homage to Enter The Spider-verse and Russian Doll/Happy Death Day 2U in 2020 feels just as dated as Toy Story. What kind of fool is still writing about Russian Doll in 2020? The Enter the Homer-verse sketch is at least ambitious and showcases how masturbatory the show has come whenever it is showcasing Dan Castellaneta’s various vocal talents. I get it dude, you like having dump trucks of money given to you for barely making an effort and doing Hannah Barbara impersonations that sound more like a bad Woody Allen. Regardless, this is still the one sketch that makes the most attempt to have comedic games with its multiple iterations of Homer and even throwing out some alternative universe Burns and Smithers for good measure. The final third Russian Doll sketch that let’s you know that this sketch is more Russian Doll than Happy Death Day by using the same exact Harry Nilsson “Gotta Get Up” piano riff. This sketch had potential but once again the show writers and creatives seem to only indulge the worst possible instincts and cast Lisa as the lead of the sketch. So that means we get to watch this 8 soon-to-be 9 year old girl and fellow child Nelson get murdered in a variety of banal and brutal ways, and it’s just not fun or pleasant to watch. The obvious choice is an unexpected Springfield resident and if it has to be a Simpson having Marge or one of her sisters be the Nadia surrogate makes far more logical sense and Marge’s birthday would carry more emotional weight.

Reminder to myself to check out this lost late series entry where Natasha Lyonne is the voice of Krusty’s daughter.

I completely understand why The AV Club canceled their coverage of The Simpsons. The whole series has a very masochistic and sadistic pull and tug between creatives and fans. The sweet and simple souls of Den of Geek are still reviewing the Simpsons and offer a far more favorable review: https://www.denofgeek.com/tv/the-simpsons-season-32-episode-4-review-treehouse-of-horror-xxxi/. Google results also yield one another publication reviewing this current season published on medium that has been taken by for violating medium rules. Will the Simpsons be coming for me next?

Skip this episode! Judging by the synopsis of the season’s next ep finding the Simpsons, once again, finding themselves somewhere other than Springfield is looking to be another skippable entry. I want to be proven wrong! The latter day Simpsons seasons usually have a memorable or decent episode here or there. So far the only thing remarkable about this season is how much it wants to try to be different and think outside of the Springfield box but in the process give the season an overwhelming sense of hollowness. I shall forge ahead with my coverage, because I am either a masochist or a sadist depending on the weather.

#The Simpsons #Bob's Burgers #TV series #tv review #Halloween #megan mullally #nick offerman #will forte #Paul rust #aparna nancherla #Andy daly #Natasha lyonne #toys story #spiderverse #russian doll #The Great North

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lokikingofasgardslover713 · 5 years

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Blue Phoenix {Oneshot}

Masterlist

This is my entry for @supersoldiersruined-me Challenge! I hope I did this justice!

Words: +2,300

Warnings: SMUT! F/F! Other than that cursing?

Prompt: Nora Roberts, Chasing Passion: She would let him yell, if that was what he needed, but she was tired, she was aching, and her heart went out to him. (In Italic)

A/N: The reader is a pink skinned Kree (definition further down) that possesses the seventh sense as well is a she is a phoenix, a blue phoenix. She was thrown out of an airlock by Ronan the accuser 2 years before Thor Ragnarök takes place & when she was found on Sakaar was thrown in with the Hulk but Brunhilde managed to bargain for the woman after the Grandmaster made sure she lost the fight.

(Pink-skinned- In an attempt to further their development, some Kree bred with other species, producing the "pink-skinned" Kree, who are similar in appearance to Caucasian humans. These pinks (also called "whites") eventually outnumbered the blue-skin Kree.)

{Powers} Superhuman Strength, Superhuman Durability, Superhuman Endurance, Superhuman Stamina, "Seventh Sense" (Kree women possess the potential for psychic abilities of various kinds, collectively referred to as a "seventh sense". This psychic potential has manifested as clairvoyance, precognition, or even lethal attributes. Some Kree women can reach into the mind of male-sex species to manipulate their desires or drain another's life force completely. Kree technology has since been created to discover and remove the powers surgically, and technorganic Bloodhounds were used to track down female reaching the adult age with those abilities. (Source HERE)

The first meet with the Valkyrie, Brunhilde, was when the tanned skin woman stormed into the room, nearly scaring Y/N shitless, having recently came to Sakaar & not have seen scraper 142 this agitated before. The woman, the Kree frozen on the couch where the woman had left her that morning, the obedience disc sure to keep her from leaving the room.

Recently only having come to a few moments ago & attempting to gather bearings in this god forsaken hell hole. Y/N seeing her opportunity as the door was still slid open rushing to the open entrance only to fall back to the floor as poison coursed through curvaceous form, not having a clue what was going on as she was drug back into the room.

“You need to stop doing this,” the tanned woman spat at Y/N, the lithe creature effortlessly lifting the others larger frame back to & on the couch as the poison subsided only to jump to bare feet again & press against the glass wall.

“No! I'm going to fight this till my last breath,” the thick framed woman snapped out at tanned woman who advanced on her fearlessly.

The thicker creature daring to look down at what she had on, pondering what the hell was with the color scheme of the leather pants & shirt that hugged tight. The Kree swearing they were painted on & a thing she would have never dressed herself in as attention finally snapped back to the woman with cognac eyes having stopped a few feet away.

“Do you even know where you are pinkie,” calling name to the fact the large framed woman was what was known as a pink or white Kree.

The woman, scraper, whatever it was she had heard someone calling the lithe woman when Y/N had been drug to this room, after the Kree had supposedly lost a match with the champion thanks to the disc after having been given no warning & literally thrown into the ring with the green guy.

“Among barbarians,” the thick framed woman blurted out.

A slight itch making a calloused hand reach up to the dried emerald green blood that came from the disc, hands flexing to call out to the psychic energy that manifested as a blue flame thanks to her mother who was a phoenix long burned out & dead thanks to her own kind. A harsh reminder that here it wasn’t to be used as it had barely showed itself before the disc took over to throw her to the floor on aching knees before she could call it back.

“You should be dead or at least mutilated. Am I correct? Kree females aren’t allowed to possess the seventh sense any longer, haven’t in centuries,” the tanned woman spoke, stepping closer as the crumpled heap glared into cognac orbs, becoming pissed by the minute & fact the woman knew a lot of the Kree, but Y/N didn’t know a damn thing of where she was or what this was on her neck.

“You tell me since you know more about me then I do you. I haven’t had a chance since I was thrown in the ring with that beast,” the woman gritted through clenched teeth glaring up at the Valkyrie who reached a bronzed hand down to help the Kree up only for her to knock it away for the scraper to shrug bare shoulders & walk away to the kitchen.

“You should be grateful Pinkie, I kept the Grandmaster from melting or lobotomizing you,” Brunhilde scoffed over her shoulder as the Kree still remained on her knees, disoriented & trying to figure out where it went wrong on the ship that had her coming to in a ring with a green giant.

“Stop calling me pinkie, I am well aware of my genetic disposition, bitch,” the Kree spat out as if it was venom on her tongue the scraper turning to look the bewildered creature as she brought food out of the refrigerator tossing it on the counter to look at Y/N with a smirk.

“That’s Mrs. Bitch to you… Pinkie,” the bronze woman smiled wide at the Kree that stumbled to uncooperative feet.

The large framed woman tripping over bottles & what have you in an attempt to stalk towards the scrapper but gave up with a huff to flop to the floor on plump ass between the kitchen & sitting area. Tired & troubled orbs looking up at the woman who smirked down at the Kree as she began to pull out the contents of the bowl to plate them up.

“You should have let him melt me or whatever,” Y/N huffed, legs out straight, elbows leaning on thick thighs to lay muddled head in jittery hands, the first headache she had since her seventh sense took over to make her entire brain pound.

“Come on, you will feel better when you eat,” Brunhilde spoke quietly, getting the thick framed creature to aching feet by looping tan arms under Y/N’ to usher to a small table & place a plate of food in front of her.

The Kree wasn’t sure what to do, she was hungry but wasn’t & hadn’t a clue what it was that sat before her. A testing poke at it in hopes it didn’t move because Y/N wasn’t sure she could keep it together at that point.

“Then tell me what you remember,” the bronze woman spoke up sitting across from Y/N who looked over at her trying to recount it herself.

Gingerly the Kree reached up to feel for the implant that aided her to breathe in space to find it had been left but it was where the bleeding came from as if it had been ripped in some way. This time she jolted as Brunhilde got to her feet to step over with a towel to look over the implant, the flat kidney shaped device looked more sophisticated than others she had seen, dabbing at it gently while reaching for the bottle of alcohol to doss the rag to clean the dried green trail that had made its way to the hollow of supple throat.

“I remember being tossed out of an airlock by someone I thought I could trust for calling him on a plan to take down Xandar. Asshole mentioned something about speaking with a titan,” Y/N spoke, letting out a hiss as the alcohol found the gash, the scraper holding the rag to it.

“I was stupid enough to think I could reason with him but guess not,” Y/N sighed out as it finally stopped bleeding for Brunhilde to take her seat back, looking over the thick framed woman poking at the food on, not looking up & looking paler than before.

“Eat,” the woman commanded the Kree that pushed at the noodle looking things with the utensil provided, finally spearing some sort of vegetable to put it into her mouth.

Well at least it didn’t taste bad she thought letting out a huff as she continued to pick over the food still expecting it to move or…

“I took the eyes off of it before I put it on your plate,” Brunhilde spoke seriously.

“OK, you know what I'm done,” Y/N blurted out, putting the fork down hard to make it echo through the room, hurrying to numb feet to stumble back to the couch, plopping down to look out the window at the ships coming & going, the colors ringing a bell but not too much as to where she was.

“You're touchy for a Pinkie,” the woman spoke sitting behind Y/N who stayed focused on the commotion outside the window as a bottle of water was pushed into sore hand in the process.

“You're brave to be conversing with a phoenix,” the Kree spoke, taking a sip of the water still looking out the window.

“I have no reason to be afraid of a phoenix,” the woman spoke fingers toying with the ends of the Kree’ hair that cascaded down curvaceous back though it was usually pulled into a tight braid.

It made the woman freeze for a moment, the only ones not put off by a phoenix or a half breed would be Aesir. Slowly turning to look at the woman who was toying with her hair to look into cognac orbs that flickered with a light, a recognition as if she was looking into Y/N’ soul.

“Why did you spare me,” Y/N began, moving back as tanned hand reached out to touch her face but stopped.

“You remind me of someone,” Brunhilde spoke calmly giving Y/N an almost wounded smile before getting up, letting known it was a tender subject.

It would have been a yelling match if Y/N was to open her mouth at this point, fresh from the battle that was Ragnarök, only to have to flee the ship, the Statesman, to Midgard due to being boarded by the very titan the Kree had been tossed out of an airlock for. Curvaceous body sore from releasing the phoenix, for the second time in 2 years or so since coming to live with the Valkyrie, the blue phoenix, blue flame burns hotter, takes more to harness it, takes more energy & wears you down quicker.

She would let the Valkyrie yell, if that was what the warrior needed, but Y/N was tired, the phoenix was aching & her heart went out to Brunhilde.

The bronze woman’s face tinting red at how harshly she yelled at Y/N for almost destroying herself, for letting the phoenix go like she had to finally calm. Looking over the flush Y/N who looked calm, having grown used to the warriors temper, the lithe woman lunging forward to fall into Y/N’ thick frame. Strong, bronzed hands pulling for thick frame to mold to the lithe warrior that held tightly, Brunhilde’ calloused hands going to cup the Kree’ flush face to pull it down to her.

“Don’t you dare leave my side or I swear to the Norns I will put the disc back on you,” the Valkyrie scolded as she jerked the Kree back to cockpit of the ship, having been called to head to Midgard, especially since most of the survivors had turned to dust.

It was obvious the Valkyrie couldn’t handle losing another paramour to death, it was a thing Brunhilde had been making clear since the first time the two of them had ever laid together & seemed to have gotten worse with passing time as well as current events.

“I'm not going to hold this grudge, it's to short,” the warrior breathed, pushing thick frame back into the pilots seat.

A knee anchoring between thick thighs, tan hands falling to wrap in the Kree’s shirt to make the leather creak as Y/N’ hands feel to lithe hips. The Valkyrie forcefully pushing the woman’s head into the head rest of the seat as the kiss became deeper tongues fighting for dominance before breaking apart to take gasping breathes.

“Stop fighting me Pinkie,” the warrior breathed down Y/N’ throat, the ship coming out of its jump before it entered Earth’s atmosphere.

“I'm not fighting you Asgardian,” Y/N snipped back with a smile, turning to look to the controls & out the window but the warrior quick to jerk attention back to tanned lips that where inches away.

“It will take 10 minutes or so for the ship to land, they know we are coming,” the warrior spoke breathlessly on pink lips the seat tilting back to allow the Kree to lay almost flat with the flick of a switch.

“That’s enough time isn’t it,” Y/N panted hand finding the hem of the pants the warrior wore to slip steady hand into the stiff leather, gliding fingers through wet folds to circle around delicate clit before the warrior finally managed the phoenix’s pants.

“I hope so,” the warrior breathed straddling thick thigh to place both knees on the seat as Y/N settled back further, hips bucking in excitement as parted lips let loose a moan the instant tanned fingers slipped deep into juicy, aching cunt.

Y/N not hesitating to do the same to the warrior as she took the Kree’ lips again obvious she was tired due to releasing the phoenix as ample hips didn’t buck as enthusiastically as they normally did. The hand fisting Y/N’ shirt releasing to go to the hand that was forced down the front of the Valkyries to pull it free & place it on the opposite hip.

“You’ve done enough sweetheart, let me take care of you for once,” the warrior spoke, forcing fingers deeper into Y/N’ velvet cunt to elicit a whimper at the force of the thrust.

The phoenix’s booted feet trying to find purchase on the grate of the ship feeling it jar as it entered the Earth’s atmosphere, thighs already shaking as the warrior continued to push Y/N closer to the edge with a whimpering cry that had the Kree’ fingers digging bruises into the warriors hips as body arched off of the seat.

“Cum for me baby,” she heard echoed darkly in shivering ear as velvet cunt fluttered around thrusting digits as calloused palm ground into aching clit in the only way the Valkyrie knew drove Y/N wild.

“Oh… Norns…,” Y/N gasped out, falling into the abyss, body overtaken by convulsions as lights burst behind shut eyes, breath caught in her throat as thick body finally tired out to fall limp into the seat panting as the warrior removed her fingers, wiping them on the inside of the Kree’s pants, supporting herself on the arm rest over Y/N who was trying to get her bearings .

“Mmmm, you give me your best,” the Valkyrie spoke darkly on Y/N’ throat placing a sweaty kiss on soft throat before looking out of the window to realize they had approached their destination faster than planned.

“Welcome to earth,” Brunhilde echoed in Y/N’ ear before placing a quick peck to pink lips, jerking jittering body to unsteady feet, hair splayed wildly over her head to look out the window at the structure to watch a familiar form, Thor, step out on the lawn to meet with them with several others in tow.

“Thought I would never set foot on this rock ever again,” Y/N spoke, having spent a year here to spy for an infinity stone for the empire before the wars, mouth dropping open as she recognized Carol Danvers.

“Come-on babe let’s go make introductions & find some where to rest,” the warrior told Y/N, taking a sweaty hand & pull her to the opening hanger, both dying to get off the cramped craft.

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#valkyrie #valkyrie x reader #valkyrie x you #valkyrie x plus size reader #valkyrie smut #valkyrie x female reader

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