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spockandawe · 3 years

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Hi.....if you don't mind me asking, what are your top 10 favorite books? And why? Sorry if you've answered this question before....

This is an interesting question, and a difficult one! Which is why I let it steep for a few days while I was in a bookbinding fugue, haha XD

I’m not sure I’ll be able to answer it, because my level of fondness is highly dependent on how recently I read a book/how many times I’ve reread it, with an optional nostalgia modifier if something made a huge impression in my youth. And when I’m picking favorites, as the number of potential [thing] expands, the more I end up dithering and fretting that I’m forgetting something HUGE as I choose. So rather than a selection of top ten, I’ll just run down through some of my favorites! I’ll split it as five cnovels (recent reads, current genre hyperfixation) and five more conventional english-language novel (realistically, probably more like series, unless a standalone book occurs to me), and I’m not going to rank the conventional novels.

SO. Regular novels first. There’s a heavy recently-read/frequently-reread element going on in here.

The Imperial Radch trilogy, by Ann Leckie. Okay, I am a sucker for a nonhuman protagonist, which is going to pop up in at least two other entries. And I’m also a sucker for themes of what can be perceived about a person externally versus their internal world, and Breq delivers like WHOA. She has SO MUCH going on in her head, and even though we’re in there with her, she still hides lots of her emotions from us. And characters like Seivarden hit me in character development buttons that I’m a sucker for, and the whole idea of consciousness being split across multiple bodies is DELICIOUS to me. Also... love me a sentient spaceship. ‘The Ship Who X’ series by Anne McCaffrey isn’t going to make this list, but I also love it a lot. (also, a universe of ‘she’s made me realized how STARVED i was for that degree of representation in certain genres that i love a lot, but don’t often see myself in as often as i might like)

The Murderbot series, by Martha Wells. Another nonhuman, sometimes-human-passing protagonist! Another one processing MASSIVE trauma of a sort that I, the human reader, have to slow down a lot and try to comprehend from an extremely different life experience! I like that a lot, it really forces me to LINGER on the nature of what a character is feeling. And oh my god, Murderbot’s voice is one of my favorite pov voices of all time. And watching it work (or go hogwild on its own asdfdgd) is absolutely delightful. I love literally everything about this series, except what happened with Miki. Other than that? Flawless.

The Books Of The Raksura, by Martha Wells. Martha Wells is a DELIGHT, y’all. Also! Another heavily-traumatized, nonhuman protagonist! And this time, like... It’s a fantasy world with huge amounts of sentient species, and the protagonist grew up away from his people, who are basically a bunch of feral homesteaders (LOVE THAT), and is trying to figure out how to reintegrate into their societal structures as an adult. That desperate desire to belong and feeling of discomfort and not-fitting-in, and the connections he makes and the way he DOES find a way to fit... like if u crey every time. Also, as far as we’re shown, it’s a cheerfully bisexual, polyamorous society, and *grabby hands*

Discworld, by Terry Pratchett. God, what do I even say about this series. It was a PARADIGM SHIFT. It’s bitingly funny, and also just plain biting, and full of huge varieties of interesting stories, set in a fascinating world, with a series of protagonists who I love too much for words. Vimes! The witches! Moist!!! They’re all so WONDERFUL. I still haven’t read the last book in the series yet, because then it will be Over Forever, and I can’t deal. This one is heavily nostalgia-tinted, but also, I stand by it.

The Belgariad/Mallorean, by David Eddings. Okay. Also very nostalgia, and the choice I can justify the least. But these books CLICKED with me. I’m afraid to reread them, because I’ve been wallowing in queer fiction for so long I’m worried about what the compulsory heterosexuality will feel like, and I know both series are very... episodic, in a way that isn’t necessarily great literature. But I dunno! Feels good, man. It’s high fantasy with a magical system I like, segmented worldbuilding of a sort that isn’t necessarily WELL-MADE, but it’s like... comfortable and easy. And something about the style and the character voices just clicks with me. I have no idea how well these hold up in the present day, but I do love them, and I’ve been planning to reread at least The Redemption Of Althalus by the same author as a standalone before I commit to a 12-book rereading of this universe, but.... I like em XD

Cnovels! I think I can rank these, so let’s go for it.

Fifth favorite: The Disabled Tyrant’s Pet Palm Fish :B Look, it’s ridiculous. It’s a transmigration story where the lead enters this fictional universe in the body of a fish, where he is adopted by a prince who eventually falls in love with him, and YES IT IS TAGGED MPREG, BUT HOLD ON A MOMENT-- I don’t know! I came here to point and laugh, but I’m honestly having such a good time right now. It’s really cute! And sweet! The main character is delightful, and the love interest is that particular flavor of semi-socialized upper-class young man, where like, can he do court politics? yes. can he politely express his affections for the main character? uh....... less so. It’s a really fun read, and I felt very sincere emotions about this prince who is passionately, deeply in love with his pet fish!

Fourth favorite: Mmmmmm, Mo Dao Zu Shi, I think. I struggle here, because it is NOT an easy book to read or show to watch, but having consumed the story, I love it to PIECES. I know a big draw for me is the protagonist, specifically, and his relationships to the people around him. And the more I cared about him, the more I wound up caring about the people around him, who I’d kind of neglected before, if that makes sense? It’s a story that really rewards some good old pondering. I didn’t care that much about Lan Xichen, but then I started thinking about how Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji relate to Lan Xichen, and then oh no, I care SO MUCH about his emotions, and now I’m thinking more deeply about how Lan Xichen relates to Jin Guangyao and Nie Mingjue-- It does lose points in this ranking because it IS hard to get into, and I would struggle to keep everyone straight even more if I didn’t have the show visuals to lean on, but it is still story I enjoyed VERY much.

Third favorite: Erha, but I feel REALLY, REALLY BAD that I can’t fit Yuwu on this list too, and I just want to loop them together. It’s time travel fixit fic, but it’s the book! Yes????? I love this. I love the striking character growth we get to see, and the changing perception of the world as the main character relives through events he already experienced and sees things in a new light, and I adore how Mo Ran’s growing guilt goes hand in hand with his growing love. And Meatbun in general... like, my god. I haven’t read another author who’s able to yank me through emotional whiplash so hard and fast. She makes me hoot with laughter one moment and then burst into tears the next. It’s absolutely wild. I love mxtx, and I think svsss/tgcf are gentler entry points into the genre and deal with lighter themes, but meatbun is seriously an UNBELIEVABLE writer if you can deal with the darker topics she covers.

Second favorite: The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System :V Look, I love it. I just love it. I love, again, characters dealing with the aftereffects of old trauma, plus I do also love seeing NEW trauma piled on top of it. I love having a main character with emotional dysregulation issues who doesn’t necessarily make good decisions, but doesn’t just leave me thinking ‘jfc what an asshole’, and I think that’s a really hard balance for an author to strike, especially without us getting direct pov. I love themes of being wanted and insecurity about being wanted, which is Luo Binghe’s major, major damage. And this is my first transmigration story I ever read, and the contrast between a main character who read the novel telling us about what’s totally going to happen versus the ground shifting under his feet is INCREDIBLY delightful to me. I’ve read other transmigration stories I enjoyed, but none that got my attention quite as much as this one.

First favorite: Tian Guan Ci Fu ;u; It’s so good. It’s so well-made! It’s so LONG, and it meanders, but also, I would scream if anyone tried to trim anything out of it. I am here a lot for the ship, honestly, but I also find the plot themes VERY interesting. I am very much here for reading about characters trying to process old trauma that’s been dredged up by new events, and also very here for the themes about how characters either pass their traumas along to the next generation, or try to shield the next generation from taking the same kind of damage (see: mdzs). And I’m also very much into tempering stories about pain with like... memories of kindness, and small acts of kindness repaid with an outpouring of devotion (see: svsss). But the craftsmanship in this book is just... DIVINE. I’m always reluctant to start rereading this one, because I have a terrible time stopping. There’s nothing about this book that I don’t like.

#spock replies #long post/#thanad-zid

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mo4-stuff · 3 years

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Sigkin, Taiyo and Arakawa additional story translation pt.2. This one is a long one!

Next story beat happens when you go back into the sewers in Naname Village.

Arakawa: "Here it is. Where did Mr. Third go?"

Taiyo: "... They're arguing in the back. Come on, I'll shut them up."

Arakawa: "Oh, you're so motivated."

Sigkin: "Are we going to be okay on our own?"

Wondering around, you'd find Ven yelling at Private First Class.

Ven: "That's a long story! Just give me the natural water!"

First: "It can't be helped... I'll explain it to you again. This natural water has been purified over a long period of time through mechanical water purification."

Ven: "Natural water of the highest quality, made pure to the utmost limit! I remember that!"

First: "Excellent! Then why do we have to work tirelessly to cleanse for all those years? Have you ever thought about it?"

Ven: "I'm so confused... Please give me that water…"

Sigkin: "Hey, Ven... What are you doing here?"

Arakawa: "Ven in the sewer? It's very picturesque."

Ven: "Who's Ven! Oh, say something to him, you guys."

First: "What you see over there is Sigkin, Arakawa, and Taiyo. I've heard about you, sir."

First: "I am Private Mechame. Please make your acquaintance…"

Sigkin: "Yeah, uh, thanks... So, what? Why are you asking for natural water?"

Benki: " ...work. It's to do with the new business of Maidon Lunch."

Arakawa : "I'm curious about that. Does this natural water make the food taste better?"

Ven: "There's that too. And this natural water is much purer and has a much higher storage capacity than conventional water. If you have this water, you can do 'that'."

Sigkin: "That thing...? I don't know, but your brother asked me to do something for him."

Sigkin: "Why doesn't First Class want to give you water?"

Ven: "Wait!!!! I'll explain. This water is the best natural water these guys can make in a long time. That's why they don't want to give it to me easily."

First: "It was almost cut off, but that's okay. There's that too."

First: "But that's not all, sir. Especially against the world above ... humans and you."

First: "Where are my brothers by the way? Didn't you see them on the way here?"

Sigkin: "Huh? I haven't seen them since I got here…"

Arakawa: "... Taiyo is gone too. Shouldn't we look for him?"

Taiyo: "You're a very bad hide-and-seek player. What are you doing skulking around back there?"

Second: "I just wanted to get rid of that potty bastard. Are you with them?"

Taiyo "No, I don't know them."

Second: "Then can you please get out of my way? I'm not supposed to give that water away so easily."

Sun: "I'm not interested in that!! Come on and get me!!"

Second: "Han! This is self-defense! Don't complain if you get hit!"

Third: "Well, that sucks!!!"

(Ensue battle)

Taiyo: "So this is the end... Boring... See ya."

Second: "What a guy...! Are you sure you're just here to fight?

Sun: "Yes! I'm done with this, I'm going home!"

Third: "I still have one more question."

Sun: "They'll take care of it."

First: "Oh, my god, that's fantastic! You are strong! You are a force to be reckoned with."

(Sigkin, Arakawa, Ven and First comes over)

Sigkin: "There he is... What's going on here?

Arakawa: "Ah, Taiyo-san, you're cheating! You look like you're having fun by yourself."

Ven: "Huh, you're here too…"

Second: "Oh, brother...! This guy's trouble!"

First: "...it's a rare thing to see you so weakened. It's not unreasonable with this opponent."

Sigkin: "Back to the topic at hand... Why did you give water to the crackers before?"

First: " ... I like strong people. It's not just about strength."

First: "Those men fought with all their might for their comrades. I was struck by that."

Sigkin: "That's not how it works...? Well, I guess it's okay for this time. It's not like anyone will die if we don't have natural water right now."

Arakawa: "You could say that. Shall we go home then?"

Ven: "Wait, wait, wait. What are you trying to finish! Don't you want to eat a good meal?"

Sigkin: "Well, I'd love to, but…"

Arakawa: "But it's not like I want to force myself to eat it when the comps don't want to."

Ven: "What are you guys doing here? Damn... with all this water, I could start a Maidon Lunch delivery service…"

Sigkin: "...What?"

Ven: "With something like a smartphone! You can start a service that allows you to order lunch!"

Sigkin: "It's…"

Sigkin: "It's so convenient…"

Arakawa: "Can you bring it to me when I'm diving in a dungeon?"

Ven: "Of course. It's my job."

Sigkin: "That's very nice of you... How can I get some natural water for you?"

First: "I''m impressed with your dedication to your work. All right, then, there's something I want you all to understand."

First: "The reason we have to spend so many years purifying the water is because the pollution from humans is getting worse in the first place."

First: "Humans are so selfish. They pollute themselves and then try to take away the water that we purify…"

First: "Repeated unfair negotiations have led us to refuse to provide natural water. To humans, especially, uncharacteristically, the uncharacteristically flippant hogwash…"

Sigkin: "I see... Well, I understand where you're coming from, but this is a difficult subject to discuss."

First: "It's not a problem that can be solved with words...

* "That's enough! Don't move!"

Third: "Ahhh!!! Help!!!"

* "Now, today is the day you're going to give me that natural water! If you don't, you'll lose your life!"

First: "What are you doing, Jaro... Humans, stop that foolishness right now."

Second: "Are you going to do it? You humans are making me laugh!"

* "Oh... Are you sure you want to hurt us? Don't get carried away with your monster ways!

* "Give me that! I've had enough of that long, drawn-out conversation!"

First: "That's why I told you to give it to me honestly."

Sigkin: "Hey. I understand how you feel, but isn't that a bad way to go about it?"

* "We are! We've been coming to this place for months to get natural water! This guy stubbornly refuses to give up his water!

* "Do you have any idea what it's like to be turned away after listening to a sermon that lasts at least four hours and at most 12 hours?

Arakawa: "I'm sorry to hear that."

* "If you guys want to interfere, I won't let you leave for free!"

Taiyo: "Nonsense. I'll be watching, so you guys do your best."

Sigkin: "Yeah... okay. Well, I'm going to stop you!"

(Ensue battle that I forgot to screenshot)

* "What the hell are they? They're so strong!"

Sigkin: "Ora, get out of here. I don't care if the village chief finds out."

* "Caihee, whoever dies in the depths of this sewer… You'll never find out…"

Chief: "Who's going to find out?"

* "What the hell are you doing here?"

Chief: "If you are going to use my monsters against me, I will take the appropriate action."

Chief: "... Move out as soon as possible."

* "Shit! Let's pull up!"

Third: "Chief ----!!!"

Chief: "I'm sorry I came so late... They won't be coming again."

Sigkin: "I just looked at the village chief and he left. Is he really a great person after all?"

Arakawa: "But I didn't know there was such a rule about monsters… I wonder if Bachikin and the others were safe?"

First: "Thank you for coming, Mr. Chief. I apologize for the disturbance."

Chief: "It is true that we humans pollute the water in which you live. This is an inevitable part of life."

Chief: "I'm really sorry. I don't know if I can represent the human race, but…

First: "It's no use apologizing to, chief. If only they would change their minds…"

Arakawa: "Isn't it because Mr. First's story is too long?"

Third: "..."

First: "...I'm often asked, do I talk too much?"

Sigkin: "You talk a lot!"

First: "I hadn't thought of that... What do you think, gentlemen?"

Second: "You talk a lot."

Chief: "You talk a lot."

Benki: "You talk a fucking lot."

First: "I just want you to know that in order to receive this water, you need to know about our purification process. Unchallenged, unchallenged, unchallenged, unchallenged, unchallenged, unchallenged…"

Sigkin: "Whoa, whoa, whoa. You need to change the way you do things. It's time consuming and inefficient."

First: "Mmm... That's true, too. I'll think about it…"

Arakawa: "So, please give him some water. This toilet is a good one."

Third: "I'd like to ask you to do the same. Not only did Ven and the others answer our call, but they also helped us like this."

First: "So my thinking is also poor... Now that you've said it, I can't help it."

First: "I believe you guys for a moment. Bring me some natural water, Ven-san."

Ven: "Benki, Benki, Benki, shut up!"

Arakawa: "Well, that was good, Taiyo. Are you listening to me?"

Sigkin: "He's sleeping."

Chief: "However, I was careless to allow the villain to enter. I'll make sure it doesn't happen again."

First: "Don't worry about it. If you really put your mind to it, someone of that caliber is no match for you."

Chief: "I will continue to rely on you, Verde."

First: "Hmmm... You too, sir."

Ven: "That's why we started the Delivery Maidon Lunch the other day! It's thanks to you guys. Eat up."

Arakawa: "Thank you for the meal, Benki-san."

Ven: "Don't say "Benki" when you're eating!"

Sigkin: "You're denying everything about yourself…"

Ven: "Delivery service allows you to order lunch anywhere, but it is a bit expensive due to the cost of shipping and handling."

Ven: "Occasionally, there are reports of junior staff making mistakes in their portions, but I'm in charge of delivery. I won't make any mistakes, so don't worry.

Arakawa: "It's okay if you make mistakes, okay?"

Third: "Thank you very much for the other day! I don't know how to thank you…"

* "Ah! Everyone~!"

(Third shows up)

Taiyo: "I don't mind."

Sigkin: "You just slept around and did whatever you wanted."

Ven: "I'm the one who should be thanking you. Thanks to you, I'm doing well."

Third: "Next time, let us overcome you with our strength. We are always waiting for you. That's the message from my brother! Hmm? We?"

Arakawa: "You're going to fight too? I'm looking forward to it!"

Ven: "So you're declaring war."

(Third glides away)

Third: "I didn't mean it like that! I'm sorry, sir!"

Ven: "I was a little too mean. Well, that's what they say. If you get a chance, you should go see him again."

Sigkin: "Can we use the delivery service now?"

Ven: "Yeah. I've just sent you the app. Please make the most of it."

Ven: "Then I'm going back to work."

Sigkin: "...Huh? Where's your money?"

* "I've already received it."

You can now use "Delivery Lunch" with the smart phone!

#marikin online 4 #marikinonline4 #mo4 #mo4 translations

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pixie88 · 3 years

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Delilah

Chapter 1 - Alone - Third A&E Series.

A/N: I originally posted this on a side blog but I was having trouble switching between the two and I also didn’t want to start again. As I said there this A&E series is a lot more darker, hitting RL subjects I have been through myself please don’t judge me as you can’t make me feel an worse than I have made myself in the past. The stigma around these subjects are real and so many people don’t speak out about them. Friends and family don’t even know the secrets I will reveal in these chapters as I am ashamed and worry about what they will think. I hope this helps even just one person realise they aren’t alone. I hope you like it 😘

I’m not going to annoy people with re-tags, so I’m not tagging in these first two chapters as most my usual tags have read it.

Find previous chapters HERE under Together - Adam & Ellie.

Word count: 1905

WARNINGS: ⚠️ Angst & adult language.

Pairings: Adam x Ellie.

Enjoy!

A Year and a half after the last chapter of A&E Together.

"She's beautiful, Ellie! A girl! We have a little girl," she looks over to him feeding their daughter. All the panic and worry was worth it! She thought to herself as she's getting stitched up.

16 week's earlier.

This pregnancy had been harder on her than Charlie's, her morning sickness had carried on until 24 weeks, she was in pain with her hips and back. Adam made her give up work at 32 weeks. She was reluctant, but knew he was right, plus at home, she could do more research on shops for sale in London.

By the time she had hit 36 weeks she had found the perfect shop, they had a cheeky weekend away in London to view the property while Ellie's mum had Charlie for them. Being heavily pregnant they didn't do much sight seeing, but they did spent a lot of time tangled beneath the sheets in the hotel room. This would probably be the last time in a long time they would have time alone, so they wanted to make the most of it.

When they arrived back home Ellie had to sort out the internal and external work. She had put in an offer and was in the proceeds of owning the new shop being, so close to the end of her pregnancy Adam took over all the dealings of the new shop not wanting his wife stressed. 40 weeks Ellie woke on her due date irritated and fed up with being pregnant their little lady showed no signs of wanting to come out.

That afternoon Ellie was in the bathroom when she thought her water had broken, looking down at the floor, she was expecting to see clear waters but instead she saw crimson red puddles of blood. She calls out to Adam who was downstairs soon rushed up to his panicked wife. Shock grew on his face as he saw what had her so panicky. He quickly regained his composure, trying not to worry his heavily pregnant wife.

Adam quickly called her midwife who told them to head to the hospital after dropping Charlie at Elaine's door. He helped an hysterical Ellie into the car. On the way her contractions started they were very close together so when they arrived, he practically had to bridal carry her out to the car with her bag to the labour ward where they handed him a wheel chair. Once in the delivery suite and after a few puffs of gas and air Ellie start to calm down she was so mellow that she wasn't even bothered when the doctor took a sample of her blood, she usually hated blood tests but the gas and air had worked its magic.

When the doctor came in Ellie was completely out of it. Between contractions, she was drifting, those few seconds between each one felt like heaven "Sorry, did you say your name is Doctor Curry? I bet you had the korma taken out of you at school!" she laughs at her own joke, then apologizes when she realised what she had said "Don't worry, I know it's the gas and air talking believe me, I've had worse. We are just going to listen to baby and see how they are! OK?" She nods.

After 10 minutes whooshing the doctor and midwife didn't look very happy with the result "What's wrong?" She asked him. He had that look all doctor have when they're about to tell you bad news "You baby's heart beat keeps dipping" tears started forming in her eyes "Dipping? What do you mean?" He hands her a tissue "Mrs Barlow, we want to deliver your baby as safely as possible and with the fluctuations of their heart beat you have an hour to deliver this baby, or we will have to take you down to theatre for an emergency c-section" her heart sank "But how am I going to have a baby in less than an hour? She just said I'm only 3 centimetres" She looks up at Adam, he's calm which soothe her.

"Well, we need to first break your waters, hopefully that should speed things along a bit. So, I'm going to leave Charlotte here to do that and I will be back in half an hour to see how you are doing" DR. Curry makes his way for the door. "Ellie, after your next contraction I'm going try and break your waters. So, I need you to tell me when it's over, OK?" Ellie nods the next contraction comes and goes. Charlotte successful breaks her waters "That feels so warm!" Ellie laughs just as the next contraction starts to build.

"Oh my god! I feel like I need to push!" She screams as the contraction takes hold. "Ellie if you need to push, then push, but little pushes!" Scared her body is tricking her, she refuses "I can't! You said I was only 3 centimetres. I'm not ready!" She hisses at Charlotte "Hey Ellie, listen to me if that's what your body wants to do then do it. I will keep an eye if nothing happens we will stop! OK? You need to trust what your body is telling you to do!"

The next contraction build she begins to push... crashing Adam's hand in the process until it fades again "You're doing brilliant, beautiful" Adam kisses her forehead "Anything?" She asks her midwife "Well, I can see the top of baby's head..." She's cut off by the next contractions "There's the head" Charlotte tells her "With the next contraction she'll be here" another starts and Ellie pushes again "And here she is 7:43PM welcome to the world little one!" Charlotte says as she cleans her up.

"Ellie, you did it again! She's here!" Adam cups her face and kisses her lips "Skin to skin?" Charlotte asks, Ellie nods "I'll just get Daddy to cut the cord" she looks over to Adam and hands him the scissors. He proudly cuts through the cord before Charlotte moves her to Ellie's chest "Does she have a name?" Charlotte looks at both of them "We're still haven't decid..." she cuts Adam off "Delilah!" Ellie looks up at Adam as the brightest smile appears on his face "Aww that's lovely! Where did you get that from?" She asks the pair.

"It was my Nan's name" Adam says not quite believing she finally had a name and a name that means something to him. "That's sweet! Ellie do you want to give Delilah to Daddy while we get this afterbirth delivered?" Charlotte places Delilah in a towel passes her to Adam as DR. Curry walks in "How are we do...oh baby is here! Wow how long did that take?" He looks over to Charlotte "15 minutes after I broke her water. She had the urge to push right away!" He looks at her stunned "Whoa! That's amazing have you requested her IV drip yet?"

Ellie looks confused "IV drip?" He looks over to her "We estimated you probably lost just over a pint of blood. This will just stop anymore bleeding" Charlotte smiles at a worried Ellie "Nothing to worry about its just because you've lost more than usually. It's routine"

"I'll go and get what we need. While you finish up in here" DR. Curry says as he leave the room.

Later, Charlotte has shift had ended and a new midwife had taken over "When can I go for a shower?" Ellie asks her new midwife Demi she wanders over checks the IV drip monitor "You have another 45 minutes on this then you should be OK" another midwife walks in and calls Demi out of the room a few minutes later she comes back in "We are going to have to move you up to postnatal ward now" Ellie looked shocked with Charlie's Labour she was allowed to have a shower before heading up.

Her legs were still covered in blood as well as her hospital gown. She got off the bed with her IV drip and into a wheelchair, Adam close behind with Delilah. She gets into her cubicle and take a seat in the chair after the midwife leave, she bursts into tears Adam puts Delilah down in her cot and rushes over to his wife "Hey, what's up beautiful?"

She looks up at him "Everything I'm covered in blood, I'm still in this awful thing. I want get into bed, but I can't sit on there like this! I want to cuddle my baby, but my arms are cover in blood. I feel dirty like I'm a cast member of the walking dead! And from what it sounds like we have a snorer the other side of this stupid curtain" He lifts up his wife's chin "Watch Delilah I'll be back in a minute" he gets up and leaves the cubicle through the curtain.

10 minutes later he comes back with a wheel chair and a midwife "You help her into the chair and grab her bag I'll grab baby" the midwife tells Adam. Wiping her tears she looks up at him "What's going on?" He smiles at her "You'll see now come on!" He lifts her out of her chair and into the wheel chair. They walk down the hall and through a door. Once inside she spots another bed and a bathroom "Adam?"

She looks up at him "This was the last one they had!" She looks at him still confused, he laughs, "£90 a night for a private room with a bath in the bathroom and this lovely lady has said if you've had over 80 percent of that drip she'll take it off you, so you can go for a soak" her eyes well up and she starts to cry again.

"It suppose to make you happy not sad!" He laughs, "Happy tears!" The midwife smiles at them both as she catches sight of Ellie, she shook her head "Oh dear, look at the state of you! They let you come up here like that! You poor thing, let me put her next to the bed and get you off this. Even if I have to put you back on after you can't sit like that!" She puts Delilah next the bed and takes Ellie off the drip before helping her to the bathroom.

20 minutes later all fresh from her shower, she emerges from the bathroom in her own comfortable clothes. Adam is changing Delilahs nappy. He looks up "Feeling better?" She smiles as she nods at him before she gets onto the bed next him. She places a kiss on his cheek, "Thank you!" He looks over to her "Why are you thanking me? You did all the hard work!" He places Delilah back in her cot "You were calm while I was losing it! I crashed your hand and you spent money on a hospital room just to make me happy!"

He laughs, "I did have my own motives! No one, not even me was going to sleep with a motorbike snoring next door!" he pulls her to his chest and pulls over the blanket over the both of them "We better sleep while she does. So, night beautiful!" She kisses his cheek "Night! I love you!" She feels him chuckle "I love you more"

Continue reading this story here - Chapter 2.

#a&e #adam x mc #alone #fictionalstory #angst #child birth #pnd

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zealynstan · 5 years

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Northshore 104.9 Interview Transcript

Unfortunately, I do not know the names of the interviewers so I figured I labeled it as Interviewer1 and so forth.

Interviewer1: ...A local artist spotlight coming up but really, we've got quite a local artist spotlight going on right now! Because we have Beverly's own Angie Miller in the studio, also known as Zealyn but we all know her as Angie.

Zealyn: Hello.

Interviewer2: Hi Angie!

Interviewer1: Hello! And also we have this on Facebook Live right now so if you happened to be in the office and you would like to also, you know, uhh... see Angie here in the studio and see what goes on behind the scenes.

Zealyn: See all your beautiful faces.

Interviewer2: Aww.

Interviewer1: You are so sweet. Yeah.

Interviewer2: So welcome! Welcome back to the Northshore.

Zealyn: Thank you.

Interviewer2: You're out in California now, right?

Zealyn: Yup, yup, lived in California for the past few years now and just umm... get out here as often as I can.

Interviewer2: Oh, that's a good answer. I would never come back.

Zealyn: I mean- Well-

Interviewer1: I mean, her mom, you see her mom, you know, your family's here, Tana's here. So yeah, and your brother.

Zealyn: Yup, yes, definitely to see family is would...

[video got cut off for some reason]

Zealyn:... And other things. Mainly family. Yeah.

Interviewer1: Of course! So, you are out on tour because you just released a new EP called A Weekend in Maine.

Zealyn: Mhm.

Interviewer1: And you're going to be doing music from that and your other hits as well tomorrow night at The Cabot, Beverly.

Zealyn: I am, yeah.

Interviewer1: I mean- Angie from Beverly at The Cabot in Beverly-

Interviewer3: How cool is that? So cool.

Interviewer1: I know. And local people opening for you as well, right?

Zealyn: Yeah, yeah. Danny Godwin and Miette Hope. She went to Berkley and now she's living in New York. But they both have lived here, still lived here and... incredible musicians. But umm... yeah, A Weekend in Maine released in just like three weeks ago and this is the tour for the EP and it's been so fun singing all the songs live.

Interviewer3: Excellent. And you wrote all these?

Zealyn: Yeah, yeah.

Interviewer3: Wow!

Zealyn: I wrote them all umm... some with co-writes like other people I loved constantly in LA, I'm just writing with new people and working with producers and just trying to stay creative as possible and find a new sound, you know, something that people haven't heard before.

Interviewer2: Now, if you don't mind, can we flashback for just a minute?

Zealyn: Ah, yeah. Of course.

Interviewer2: So you're a local girl, there's- we have tons of local people who loved to sing, who loved to perform-

Zealyn: Sure, yeah.

Interviewer2: Hopefully I think, want to make it big someday so, can you like just quickly like, what made you want to get into this? And what made you want to go, "American Idol, maybe I have a shot at that"?

Zealyn: Well, I always grew up singing, it was always like the first love of mine uhh... and I think about the age... 10 or 11- I forget the age but I remember watching an episode of American Idol when I was a little girl. And I was like, "Oh my gosh, I wanna be on the show one day." like, "I wanna be on American Idol."

Interviewer2: Wow!

Interviewer3: That's so cool. I got chills.

Zealyn: Oh yeah. It was just like one of those things that I said as a girl and my mom and I would watch it every single year, we'd vote for our fave- the whole thing.

Interviewer2: You really got into it. Watch parties, the whole night.

Zealyn: We got into it. Fully.

Interviewer3: Her mom and I did the same thing. It was such a good thing for like a mother and daughter to do and get excited about.

Zealyn: Yeah. Watch parties as in, just me and my mom with some popcorn and- yeah. *laughs*

Interviewer1: And candies.

Interviewer2: But, I just think that it's incredible because it's not impossible. You know what I mean like-

Zealyn: Yeah.

Interviewer2: You're a local girl; you're from Beverly, Massachusetts, like anyone in this area who thinks they wanna do something in the singing or performing industry. It's durable, you did it and it's like, "Don't give up on it." You know what I mean?

Zealyn: Well thanks. I mean, definitely, even after the show, I realized I knew absolutely nothing about the music industry. The industry is like crazy, it's hardcore. So much different than I thought it was.

Interviewer2: I've been in the radio industry (for) 6 years and I know nothing either. It's amazing I can push a button.

Zealyn: We just pull it off. We're making up as we go.

Interviewer1: So you make it through, I mean, I can't even imagine- I mean, we can only imagine from watching the show, what the process is like and you make it through the finals in season 12.

Zealyn: Yes.

Interviewer1: When you look back on it, is it almost seem surreal in a way?

Zealyn: Totally. In one hand, it feels like it was yesterday and like, "oh cool" and the other hand, it feels like it was another life. Like, it doesn't feel like that was me. I looked different, acted different. I was 18, you know? So it definitely feels like another lifetime ago but yeah, everything that you've seen on tv if it looks dramatic or if it looks intense, it's 10 times more than that.

Interviewer3: Really?

Zealyn: Yeah. It's like- it's a grueling process, not just for me, for the whole family. It took a toll- it takes a toll on your physical health and mental- I mean, yeah, it's quite the-

Interviewer1: So you came in third right?

Zealyn: Third, yes.

Interviwer1: Okay. So, you're on that final show?

Zealyn: Yeah, yeah. We were there til' the end. The whole process altogether from audition to the end of the tour was almost 2 years.

Interviewer1: Wow!

Zealyn: Yeah.

Interviewer1: Wow. I had no idea it was that length of time.

Zealyn: Yeah. It takes a- the audition process is six months itself and-

Interviewer3: And you go on tour with them. With the top ten?

Zealyn: Yeah. We went on tour with the top ten for 2 months but there was a whole month of rehearsals, it's a long process. That's why I- I was choosing between college or American Idol and I knew that if I did American Idol and it worked out, I was like, "Man, that would take up a lot of time." Maybe I should just be safe and go to college or... Yeah. Umm... But then it worked out.

Interviewer3: And there you are! And when did you come from- go from Angie Miller to then Zealyn? How long ago was that change?

Zealyn: Yeah, so I released an EP under Angie Miller and that's when I actually played at the Cabot last time I played all those songs. And it's still- I mean- When you're 18 and thrown on national tv and they're saying, "who are you? who are you? what's your sound?" you don't know anything. Like, I didn't know anything. So American Idol in a way created me. It chose my sound for me and my look and it chose the way I was gonna act and be perceived by America. So they did it all for me, they created Angie Miller and I just, I couldn't stand it. And I just kinda wanted to be me and it's funny that changing my name made me feel more like me. No, I didn't change it legally or anything.

Interviewer2: Yeah!

Interviewer1: Right. By using your performance name-stage name and performing.

Zealyn: Yes. It feels more genuine, it feels more- that's why- there are a few fans who are like, "Why would you not go by Angie?" but I wish people would just know and if people are listening and didn't know I went by Zealyn like, it's me. I'm Angie. It's just a stage name.

Interviewer2: Right!

Interviewer3: Mhm.

Interviewer1: But I do get what you're saying that you know-

Interviewer2: Fully.

Interviewer1: Becuase you had to obviously, use your real name on American Idol and you know, when you're talking about the fact that they- because they knew everything about you. And how do you go back to you?

Zealyn: Right.

Interviewer1: Yeah. I think it is hard.

Zealyn: Yeah, and it took- I think it was 2016 or 2015 was the year that I decided to just start creating music and thinking of changing my stage name and it was really really hard to find a name to replace your name like it's the weirdest process.

Interviewer3: Oh yeah.

Zealyn: Umm... Zealyn was the first name that I felt peace about and it felt like I could say, "Hey, my name is Zealyn." and it felt right. But yeah, Zealyn was my way of getting back to my genuine self. *laughs* Yeah.

Interviewer3: That's amazing.

Interviewer2: I love it.

Interviewer1: I love that story. So, we have a little clip of one of your new songs.

Zealyn: Yay.

Interviewer1: So, what was the title of this song?

Zealyn: This song is called Airline Wine. I umm...

Interviewer2: Very catchy. Did you help her write this?

*Interviewer3 shakes her head*

Zealyn: I went to Europe for the first time last year and umm... I had a writing session and one of the first days I was there, I was so jetlagged and I did not know what to write about. And my- yeah.

Interviewer3: I love them. I absolutely loved them.

Zealyn: And my friend who I was with had one of those little airline wine bottles.

Interivewer2: Wine cooler.

Interviewer1: Yeah, and they- I mean they come in these little mini bottles.

Zealyn: Little plastic- yeah. And she was like, "Why don't you write a song called Airline Wine?" and it totally is a joke.

Interviewer1: And you're like, "Whoa."

Zealyn: And I'm like, "Wait a second, that's kinda catchy."

Interviewer1: Alright, let's listen to a little bit of it.

*Airline Wine starts playing*

Interviewer2: Ooh, I like that.

Interviewer3: That was beautiful.

Interviewer2: Get her on the house party.

Interviewer1: Oh yeah.

Interviewer3: Absolutely.

Interviewer2: I don't know about you but I want a glass of wine now.

Interviewer1: And so this is on your new EP that is called A Weekend in Maine and it was released a few weeks ago. And you'll be performing all kinds of great music tomorrow night at the Cabot in Beverly.

Zealyn: Oh yeah. Yeah, I released two EPs under Zealyn so I'll be releasing from both those- I'll be playing a lot of music from both those EPs as well as some of the classic covers and songs that people would recognize from American Idol umm... Yeah. Just kind of doing it all.

Interviewer1: So sounds fun tomorrow night.

Interviewer2: That's right. So-

Interviewer3: A Weekend in Maine, I love that name.

Interviewer2: I love that name too! That's where all my weekends are spent with the kids. It's really just cool.

Zealyn: Same same yeah. A lot of memories.

Interviewer2: Where in Maine?

Zealyn: *to her mom* Do you remember exactly where?

Tana: Madison, Embden.

Zealyn: Madison, Embden?

Interviewer2: Okay. I was thinking of the Naples bridge, Denario.

Zealyn: Okay. I was just a little kid. I didn't pay attention to where it was.

Interviewer2: No, you're just happy to be here. Right? Running around.

Interviewer1: You're having a good time.

Zealyn: Just Maine, I loved it.

Interviewer2: So we're speaking to Zealyn a.k.a. Angie Miller as we all know her from here on the Northshore and we gotta wrap it up. We're really running late but just any final words to anyone who wants to pursue music?

Zealyn: Oh man, just love it. Enjoy the process. If you're not enjoying it, it's not worth it. But yeah just umm... don't listen to what everyone else is doing, create your own sound. Be you. Could be creative, surround yourself with creative people, I mean, yeah. You gotta enjoy it in order to last in the industry for sure.

Interviewer2: That's awesome.

Interviewer3: I love it.

Interviewer1: So let's give away a pair of tickets right now to see tomorrow night. The show starts at 8, you've got a couple of opening acts and then, Angie Miller a.k.a. Zealyn at the Cabot theater. If you are free to go, this is tomorrow night, starts at 8, call our line right now.

Interviewer3: Okay, give us a call at 1-800-370-1049. Again 1-800-370-1049, the tickets can be yours. Go see Zealyn. Angie Miller at the Cabot in Beverly tomorrow night. 1-800-370-1049.

Interviewer1: Okay. Call now to win. And this is what's in store for tomorrow night at the Cabot.

Interviewer2: Thank you so much, Angie.

Interviewer3: Thank you, Angie.

Zealyn: Thank you.

#Zealyn #Transcript #Interview #radio interview #northshore radio #2019 #Angie Miller #A Weekend in Maine #my post

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