Get these gay people OFF my screen >:/

Since it’s Valentines Day, I guess it’s time for me to share the fictional crushes I’ve had on characters throughout my life:

My Fictional Crushes Throughout History:

Shadow The Hedgehog

Shadow was the first fictional crush that I had as a kid and the one that I can mention at the top of my head with some bravery and expectation of confusion and humiliation from others. I guess after learning of his existence in Sonic Riders (my first Sonic game) and onwards into the Sonic series (and a bit of Smash), I started to develop a crush on Shadow thanks to his design and personality after learning more and more about him. I believe that his portrayal in Sonic X especially had an effect. I mean, I wasn’t the only one to have a fictional crush on Shadow, considering how many fan girls he’s had over the years.

Mephiles The Dark

And then after Shadow, I eventually developed a fictional crush on Mephiles from Sonic ‘06. I believe I was 12 or 13 at the time that I did. I’d say this one is even weirder than the Shadow crush. But if it wasn’t for my interest in Mephiles and well, Solaris as a whole, I probably wouldn’t have discover my interests in the sources that beings like Solaris is based off of, like biblical mythology and other forms of mythology, space-time itself, and the sun and the moon. Therefore, they have been an important and influential character to me as unique as that may be to others. Delving more into Solaris in ‘06, I started to believe that he wasn’t the true villain of Sonic ‘06 as he was an entity whose power was being misused in the wrong hands of a very desperate and selfish human. That being the Duke of Soleanna, who wanted to save his wife from whatever presumed death that she had by harnessing Solaris’ power over time itself and even find a way to give humanity the power of time-travel in order to correct their past mistakes which mind you, is a bullshit and an absolutely dangerous, selfish, and idiotic idea. Perhaps one of the worst ideas I have ever heard in my life. Humanity absolutely does not deserve to be in possession of such abilities at all, PERIOD. Imagine all the recklessness, greed, bickering, fights, and just flat-out stupidity. Ugh, you’re just giving humanity the ability to not only make more mistakes, but potentially worsen their past mistakes. LIKE, WHAT THE HELL WAS HE THINKING?!?! I mean, when you learn that, it’s absolutely no fucking wonder why Solaris got all pissed and went batshit crazy throughout space-time. I mean, I would’ve too if some fucking idiot tampered with my power and form like that. And it didn’t help that Eggman was obliviously trying to repeat the same stupid action that the Duke did. I swear mad scientists tend to be the true evil and the creator of evil in existence. They’re one of the archetypes that do a great job at pissing me off. Well, they’re not called “mad” for nothing.

Solaris is just a misunderstood entity who just needed better guidance and treatment in existence. It’s why I even imagined the possibility of Solaris being saved and given a better chance towards redemption and understanding. After their backstory, I felt so sympathetic towards them as a character. Sure, Mephiles plan could’ve made more sense in the script by being less convoluted and more simple in the script alongside the time-travel plot itself, but we can’t forget that ‘06 was indeed rushed in development so it’s no surprise that writing for the game’s story was also rushed and didn’t have enough time for some scenes and decisions to be reconsidered.

But regardless, Solaris holds a special place in my heart and the inspiration they have given me has been a gift. So even if they’re outside of the existence of the Sonic universe, I shall never forget about them.

Crazy Hand

There was a time where I got really interested in Master Hand and Crazy Hand from Super Smash Bros. After discovering Crazy Hand’s existence in Melee, I suddenly started watching more videos featuring him and Master Hand, even if it was the same few videos. Like I was deeply analyzing the two hands in action. I was so fascinated, yet pretty intimidated by them. I believe that Crazy Hand had fascinated me the most, given the way of how he parallels Master Hand and his personality. Then all of a sudden, I started crushing on him...How utterly weird of me to be crushing on a giant floating disembodied hand of chaos and destruction....

Daxter

Daxter was my top favorite character of the Jak and Daxter series. Not to mention how much the series is a childhood icon to me. I also loved the design of ottsels/precursors. It inspired me in terms of anthro designs. I know, I’m pretty much a furry at this point with these crushes. I guess that I can now relate to Tess, who eventually became an ottsel/precursor just to officially be Daxter’s girlfriend.

Joker (P5)

Back when he was announced to be included as a fighter for Smash Ultimate. It was my first exposure to Joker and Persona 5 itself. And back when his Smash fighter self was still in development, I felt interested enough to research Joker then eventually look into Persona 5. I started to adore his design and silent protagonist self. His fluffy looking hair, glasses, phantom thief design, and personality, and that smile made me develop a crush on him. He’s pretty much the only fictional human character that I had a crush on out of all the crushes here and that’s saying something.

A Fan-made Genderbend Waifu Nightmare From Kirby

Okay....how the hell do I explain this..? So back when I had a peak interest (and fear) in one of the most underrated Kirby characters and final bosses, Nightmare, I looked up fan art of him and discovered this sorta genderbend waifu interpretation of him on the Internet. I was interested in the design, enough to make an original character of mine have their design inspired off of it and that’s mainly where my crush was targeted on. Knowing that this had to do with Nightmare from Kirby of all characters, this is perhaps the weirdest and most embarrassing crush of them all. This would just be the beginning of me getting invested into oneiric (dream) characters.

NiGHTS

When I was starting to really invest into the NiGHTS universe and NiGHTS themselves, I started to appreciate their design and personality to the point where I found it attractive and relatable at times. This crush hasn’t been a constant nor lasting one though, so I see it as a small crush instead.

Wizeman and My Own Fan-made Gender Bend Waifu Parallel of Him, “Wize-Chan”

Ah jeez, here we go again. So, um, like Nightmare, I had a notable interest in Wizeman as a character and was also greatly intimidated by them at the same time. I eventually started thinking that he was a bit cute in the first game. Seriously, why I do I eventually develop crushes on the same characters that I get scared of? Am I a psychological masochist or have Stockholm Syndrome or something? In order to ease my fear, I made the jokes on this platform on Wizeman and the other NiGHTS characters. Sometimes, fear can be a great motivator and that already scares me alone. One of those jokes involved redesigning Wizeman as a Waifu named “Wize-Chan”:

When humanizing the design, I wanted to maintain the surrealism of Wizeman’s design, so I made sure not to humanize it too much. That’s why the shadowy legs are phantom-like and the robe acts more like a cloak than a robe with a presumed shadowy phantom body underneath. Probably think of it how Darkrai from Pokémon has these slim legs that it can make to stand on something. Idk. Jokes aside, I felt that this was an embarrassing thing to make. But recently, I’ve looked back on the design and I started to develop a fondness over it. She was just too adorable to ignore. It motivated me to draw more of her and establish a personality. She still maintains Wizeman’s personality and god complex, but with a tsundere touch to it. She also uses the insult “degenerate” occasionally since I imagined Wizeman in Journey of Dreams using it. (Example: “Eh? You want me to step on you? Ugh, DEGENERATE.”) She can get accused of being a furry, but she gets offended and denies it. There’s never a place for violence in a relationship, but Wize-Chan differs. I suppose Wize-Chan here can be compared to Bowsette, since it’s taking a villain and turning them into a Waifu character. You could look at it that way if you wanted to. Wize-Chan also likes to bully Owl whenever she gets the chance.

Speaking of Owl, I recently designed a Waifu form of him—

Arceus

Just a little bit. It was a minor crush. Afterwards I changed my mind and started seeing them as a mother figure instead. I like to refer to them as “mom”, “mommy”, “Mama Llama”, "o-ka'a-san" (Japanese for mom), and “Mother”. Arceus just naturally feels like a mother figure to me, as weird as that sounds. I mean, it makes sense, considering that they’re Pokémon God and God is always interpreted as referring to his creations as his children. That’s been interpreted the same for Arceus. I mean, it’s okay for your mother or father to be your valentine, right? That, and why am I so invested in creator entities/deities so much?

So over the years, I’ve had fictional crushes on 1 anthropomorphic artificial hedgehog with alien DNA, an anthropomorphic otter and weasel hybrid that also belongs to a race of ancient beings that run the universe as its god, a sun god of time, a giant floating disembodied hand that’s the destructive god of the Smash universe, Pokémon God itself until I started seeing it as my Pokémon mother, a Waifu form of a personification of nightmares, a disobedient nightmaren then eventually just their creator as well as a Waifu parallel of him, and 1 human..huh.