#also i slid down an entire fuckin hill tonight in the dark because all the snow froze solid and turned to very painful ice
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i am going to Fucking Scream
#>:( i guess i like him now this sucks#also i already sent him a friend playlist with songs that are like ''snap out of ur stupid crush buddy''#and ''not gonna date'' songs which is like funny i guess but >:(#also i sent him the ''how do you get beautiful women to smoke weed with you in seven words'' post and based on his reaction#he seems still into me?? like even included a fuckin ;)#also i slid down an entire fuckin hill tonight in the dark because all the snow froze solid and turned to very painful ice#it took an HOUR to get back in my house#with help from my mom and brother who had to tie a rope around a tree stump and throw it down#also the sheep were ALSO skidding on the ice which was concerning because they're dumb enough to break legs doing that#i used more muscles trying to move in my own backyard without hitting a wild animal that i saw a couple days ago or a tree#than i have in the fucking WEEKS i have done of ballet classes#but back to the guy! he's also got a date coming up with a goth chick that used to do ballet#how the FUCK am i supposed to compete with that? does NOT help that i also started nerding out about how strong ballerinas get#like i KNOW we would not work out for multiple reasons one of which i'm still catholic but also like. i'm afraid of men ig?#and i didn't think it was a big thing but w the anniversary last week i was like 'i must be feeling like shit for NO REASON#IT CAN'T HAVE BEEN THAT BAD I'LL READ THE OLD MESSAGES TO CONFIRM IT WASN'T' uh besties it was WORSE#and like i know he's into consent and shit (which is SO weird to say because everyone should be) but like. smsjskdjdhfk the fuck#and i can't just SAY THAT#and it's not like w people you've been gay w since high school#because then u can be like 'hey i like u i know u like me but i don't wanna do anything about it'#and like you'll both be sad but also get it
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