#also i fucking hate how every single day theres another stupid assignment to do
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crying why the fuck do I have a project due over winter break? for english??? and it has to be a 30 second stop motion? and the instructions are unclear as FUCK?????????
wheres your holiday spirit maam????? (<- doesnt even celebrate Christmas or anything but wants an excuse to not do anything over break)
#like last project we could choose the format#art or a game or a travel guide or something else like that#but we dont have any say in the format this time???? what the fuck???#raine's rambles#probs belongs on the irl acc but also idk man idk#also i have a partner but i get to do the hard part; make a stopmotion myself????#this is so fucking stupid#also i fucking hate how every single day theres another stupid assignment to do#this workload fucking SUCKS#AGH I JUST WANT TO DRAW LEGOES BUT I HAVE TO MAINTAIN MY STUPID GRADES#FUCK
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the empty text box answer hall of fame
over 400 of y’all took my stupid uquiz. why.
an anon ask requested me to show my favourite answers to the little text box at the end so i spent like two and a half hours going through every single answer AGAIN since i hadn’t screenshotted any while looking through them the first time. you idiots are so funny and lovely people and here is a big post going through some iconic answers. i hope this can be entertaining but also it is mostly just for me lol
first of all, in one of the questions i mention that i often leave “i fucked ur mom” in the empty text boxes at the end of most uquizes. this then resulted into 43 of you leaving “i fucked ur mom” in the textbox in some way or another and one person asking: “i wonder how many people wrote “i fucked ur mom” after what you said earlier”. some favourite variations of this include:
as a wise uquiz maker once said “I fucked ur mom”
to quote u, i fucked ur mom <3
i fucked your mom but i thought it was you anyways the pussy was bomb
as I was fucking your mom, I realised that I truly am the sexiest bitch alive
i didn’t fuck your mom, but i did make sure she got home safely <3
and a bonus i also enjoyed: Can you ask your mom if she’s single
no, my mother is not single, and i really hope none of you actually fucked her. that being said i laughed at these every time thank you so much
these next ones i just want to talk about even though the original sender will most likely not even see them. or they just need some context. i just need peace of mind
the first question of the quiz was my favourite one to do because kpop songs are sometimes absolutely fucking bonkers and i wanted to showcase that it was hilarious!!!! i can confirm that not all kpop is like that. i specifically chose the funky ones because i think it does add to character and that is something that i can simultaneously enjoy and also laugh at. but kpop also has amazing lyrics!! it’s not all one thing and kpop is super diverse. i didn’t personally know some of the songs i put in there, i just knew their funky lyrics so i cannot speak for fm but also what the fuck was that song
as you should. carry on. i was very threatening with “do not leave it empty you bitch”
this one was just cute!! idk if you’re going to see this person who sent it but my native language is finnish. chuu is an icon.
one of my questions was if you were a wizard what would you say when you cast a spell and one of those answers was fuck you. this person took it to the next level and i loved it so much i couldn’t stop smiling at this one
listen i’m fuckin trying
this person just completed the assignment. left me a wonderful love letter
and last but not least, this person did everything i told them to do in the actual question. a+ incredible performance!!!
if i could i’d put in all the screenshots i took but since there is a photo limit i believe, i will just write them out exactly as they are. moving on, here are just some random ones that i really enjoyed:
i’m your father, luke
i am so sad, i dont have enough white beads to make a little 3d seed beed chicken sitting down ): i even arranged all the beads i stole from my mom by color, it took me 3 days, and now i cant even make a little chicken ): a little seed beed chicken )’:
you’ll meet the king of fungi in 34 days
today i managed tp find the nether fortress and collect 10 blazerods. im about to beat minecraft for the forst time in my life
Dude every question of this was a riot I love you
Bro I’m just here for the vibe
I think dogs should be able to vote
i killed a man lol
Pebis.
jack sparrow pirates of the caribbean was confirmed some flavor of homo way back when which means HE was disney’s first gay character yet they refuse to give pirates of the caribbean the credit it deserves and they refuse to my calls where I try and tell them they simply must have jack sparrow pirates of the caribbean kiss a man directly on the lips in the next movie
ehhhhhh I’m evil penis boy im gonna steal your penis
I love you, no homo. The homo costs extra
Yo check this out *<|:) he’s in a party hat
theres way too many kpop references in this quiz
\_/____ it’s a slug
that was the weirdest quiz i’ve taken in a while and i truly enjoyed it
My cat is meowing at me i thin i’m going to die today
FUCK (are you pleased)
I wish I was a nac Mac feegle but more than that I wish I could enjoy being a nac Mac feegle
I forgot what this quiz is about already
I hated these questions and have lost 10000 years of my life answering them (no but thanks for the quiz!!!)
on god I was gonna choose the ‘cuddling stray kittens’ option for the how do u sleep question but then I remembered that I actually did sleep in a refrigerator box on my bedroom floor for months when I was like 9 :/ throwback!!!
when i was 7 i put my hand in a food processor while it was running to “see what would happen” and somehow im 28 and still have all my fingers and toes
this last one deserves its own moment. it’s the best message i got:
congrats on the phd doctor bitch!!!
along with all of these messages, i got a lot of song recs (thank you sm!!) and i got so many lovely messages from people saying they liked the quiz or just other generally nice things and i can’t explain how much serotonin these answers have given me. just wanna thank everyone who took the time to write something in there i loved it!!!!!!!
#honestly these all made me so happy#barely anyone will see this post#its just for me#it is very personal#eh ill still tag uquiz#it wont clog up anyones look through the tag#i put a cut there for a reason#uquiz
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Good Job, today too
Today (18/12/17) one of the idol i grew up with passed away and become one of the stars. I never thought to see this day writing this and completely in synch with the thoughts he had.
This year has been extremely hard for me, getting into Uni in the first place was the start of the whirlwind of my self destruction. It was hard knowing how much potential i had, my passion and thirst for knowledge is being slowed down by no one but myself, like any other beings like it was a creature that lives, my fears and hopelessnew grew. To quote president snow from my favorite trilogy Hunger Games " Hope is the only thing stronger than fear " and i only have the later, because the former vanished along with my beliefs of everything.
It began when i suffered so much through first semester of Uni, when i couldn't handle the fact that i got a C i was shaking, i made my parents disappointed again i killed my parents expectation, at first it was just a simple breakdown, then later it grows next semester i realise i can not go through with the way i am going through, slacking off assignment last minute, coming late, i took full 22 credits that semester and of course i suffered even harder, i got a D in philosophy, no biggie i said as i took my breath completely shaking to the core, mom and dad doesn't have to know, i could retake the course and everything will be dandy again! But it doesn't stop there next semester i got 2 D i was completely shaking even harder because i didn't expect that result at all, couldn't forget that breakdown i had i called uut wanted to get to her home but i abandoned that plan because i don't wanna burden her even more. I realise that day theres something wrong with me, my mood and anxiety was at the worst point ever that year it push me into finding out what was wrong with me. I thought i had bipolar lol and silly me talked about it to one of my psychology major friend, she was right that day dismissing my concern, it wasn't the right diagnosis i would call because one day i found out about adhd and everything just click. In 2014 I've discovered something new about myself, it's a help that knowing it's not entirely my mistake, i met someone on internet, lovely Shannon, she has helped me in a way that no else has. I didn't talk to anyone about it because i knew there's nothing they can do about it, i planned to meet a psychiatrist but i didn't have money back then and i said to myself you can go through this! It helps that i realise that i am not just a quirky girl next door, my carelessness my inability to focus isn't completely my fault and i wasn't in entire control.
In late 2015 and 2016 me and shannon was no longer in contact, fine i can deal it on my own, i got into seventeen and meet the awesome person and lady that Kitty is. I'll explain more about it later, but 2016 was one of the worst year for me, i took care my disorder more as i began to realise everything wrong with me, i was hard on myself, i failed school i failed my parents as they like to point out and at the same time that year I was proud for getting 5 As in seven course i took, but that's the only light it began downright downhill from there, i took time off the internet because it made my mental health even worse and from there i began to talk to kitty more in other platform, always Thankful for knowing her. That year i took my internship program everything was stressful, i finally realise such work environment doesn't suit me, it was also the time i started working on my thesis title, my restlessnese and overwhelming feelings began to come in full force it took me two months to get the first chapter to finalise, i hated myself immensely, everything was awful that finally i seek a psychiatrist help it was pricy but i had some money, i thought i have to help myself this is the answer but of course reality punch me in full force the psychiatrist know nothing about my struggle he understand nothing it made physically broken, no one could help me. I asked for recommendations still i want to try medications i was scared, I didn't wanna depend on stimulant i don't wanna be a junkie, but I've hit rock bottom i thought nothing to lose maybe meds would help me.
It took some time and bravery for me to see another psychiatrist, it was hard, but itvwas even harder when he simply declares i have anxiety disorder i guess it makes sense in a way theres young woman having a breakdown in the hospital, admitting no one can understand them but his diagnosis made me even crazier he prescribed me anxiety meds, clobazam, to which i took in fear because it was also prescribed for ppl with manics, i told my concern with another break down, he didn't take it well of course and still sure about his diagnosis. From there i was just devastated completely and resigning in hopelessness. No one could understand me no one could fucking help me. I took the meds though but i know i don't have anxiety disorder, my anxiety level is off the chart i realise its just not enough to be classified into one.
Few months of procastination overwhelmed me on thesis just made the situation several degree more worse. Everything is all i don't wanna be a liar, a manipulative loser and ultimately someone who's not even worth a living. I lay on bed all day all night feeling like the biggest disappointment and waste of air, my parents couldn't be more wrong. It's difficult for me to even begin explaining the concept to somone who raise and birthed me, it's even more difficult when i tried to open up to my relatives and they didn't take me seriously, it's next to impossible when i just made the professor i look up and admired to, the person who think i had so much potential but i kept letting him down every single time. Reality was so hard that sometimes I'd rather i never woke up from a dream, which i rarely had because it all just blank dark and cold like my life. The tears pouring down were competing with the rain outside.
Kitty who takes no bullshit came as the support system i never knew i have, i met ben too early that year, 2017 is actually the year i took the matters in my own hand because i can not keep be like this. But every step ahead i took equivalent of several step back, my meeting with the old psychiatrist of course went shit but i don't give a fuck anymore, i steal money from my parents, i saved them from my freelance work so i can afford the meeting to begin with. I lied and makes excuses so i can get the time to make an appointment i am a filthy liar
The meds however turn out like nothing I expected, it gave me extreme nausea, it makes me hungry zoned out but I'm still the clutterheaded brain that i am it's like all of my dream of some kind of knight in shining armor vanished, there was never a one quick solution, all it left is one cold reality. It was the fool of me who expect something that is never the truth of life that no one can save me but myself. Even after my silly theatric of another breakdown i had in the cousin house because i have no money to afford another meeting, not even after they broke my trust and told my parents who of course treat me like a fucking freak. Another cousin who fucking belittles me that i was being stupid that all my concerns are faux i don't have energy to argue, none, all my wills are gone by that moment that it became easier to just lie and nod agreeing to all her comments
Each day my parents worries and anger grew into explosion just like my self worth, i began to hurt myself self harming it felt good and scary at the same time when i did, good because i deserve it i'm a fuckin piece of disappointment afterall, scary because deep down i don't want to die but i honest to god wants to end the pain i felt, i began to actively look for a way to end myself with the painless way as possible thats, it just hurt deeply the pain i felt is so intense that if i dont live in the house my parents own maybe i would cry for days its why the day jonghyun suicide news came out i couldn't stop crying i know exactly how he came into that conclusion, and every time i read into everything about it i just broke down, third day and the pain still raw i don't know if i could be at peace with the constant war i have, i know i have my good days i am a positive thinking person by nature i like to think the world would be at its definite beauty someday but when that bad comes it just hard i woke up feeling like there's no purpose in living, someday maybe i would update this blog and be able to write that i am Happy that i won my own war, and when that day comes i have to give myself a pat on my back, good job today too
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