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jayjaysocks · 4 years

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Listing my favorite animes (because I’m jumping on the bandwagon)

❗️⚠️ *spoilers!! (Duh)* ❗️⚠️

5. Deadman Wonderland

I was really really sad when I found out this anime got cancelled. The music was fantastic, the animation was really good, and the voice acting was incredible. Even the fucking dubbed version (I loved the voice they chose for Senji. God he was hilarious). I binged this show so fucking fast it wasn’t even funny. I loved watching the characters go through their own struggles and grow as people in the very small amount of episodes provided. There was a lot of development within the snippet that we actually saw, and I was thoroughly impressed with how well it was done. I wanted to scream or something when I found out there wouldn’t be a second season.

Sigh. Oh well. At least we got some of the manga’s masterpiece translated into a show, even if we were missing some fucking awesome characters.

4. Guilty Crown

Ugh, don’t even get me started. This anime was beautiful and I got so invested so freaking quickly. I literally go back every few years to rewatch it because I get ship starved.

Shu and Inori’s story was so beautifully done; between Shu uncovering his courage and Inori’s journey of self-discovery, I was continuously awe-struck and filled with feelings—I mean, I had never felt such raw emotion while watching something and I was completely blown away by the affect it had on me. Anger, hatred, sadness, it was all there (even for the main character lmao) and it was one of the first times I had ever felt a ship so heavily that I literally cried at the end. It was one of the very first Animes I’d ever seen and was one of the reasons I got such a taste for them. Thanks for throwing me down that rabbit hole, GC.

3. Soul Eater

This was literally the first Anime I’d ever seen, and my god I couldn’t have asked for a better starter. What I like about this one is that it’s style is so unique and different. It’s very punk and grunge, something I admired and appreciated in a genre that is normally the opposite (like Guilty Crown, for example). Also the fight scenes were badass, like holy shit just look at that gif ??? Freaking amazing.

I loved the way the show transitioned from light hearted to intense and adrenaline pumping so effortlessly. That can be said about a lot of shows, but this one went from *haha cute show* to *holy shit, like they’re actually gonna die ohmygod howaretheygoingtosurvivethis* so smoothly I was genuinely surprised. They made one of the main villains actually cool and each character had their own beautifully done arc. I loved and adored how the show solidified and expanded on the different friendships/relationships that were involved—specifically Soul and Maka’s (also, holy shit, Stein’s arc? Fucking prime, dude). There was a lot of growth in each and every friendship (CRONA!!!), and that really pushed the viewer to invest in the individual characters.

I am fucking delighted that this was my first anime, and (though the ending was a little anticlimactic) it remains one of my top favorites to this day. It set the bar pretty fucking high, and for that I am extremely greatful.

No one asked for Soul Eater: Not! It is the unspoken sin of the Soul Eater world (then again, it is called Soul Eater: Not!)

2. Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood

If you have been following me for a while, then you are no stranger to my love of FMAB. Some of my most popular posts are about this anime, and for good reason.

Unfortunately, I was late to the party. I actually didn’t watch this until last year, but got invested really damn quick. I have a tendency to be extremely picky about the animes that I watch/like (which is why NONE of these shows are that recent), to the point that I will literally research them before I start watching (a bad habit, do not copy me). I have an incomparably hard time finishing a show when I start, because I get bored really quickly, but this was an exception. I started watching and I just... didn’t stop. I spent a straight week watching FMAB, gobbling it up during any small amount free time I could manage, and finished it before I even knew what happened. I wasn’t picky about it, I didn’t research it, I just dove right in and gosh, I was not disappointed.

The subtle romance that was alluded throughout the entire show was super cute, the devotion the brothers had for each other was to die for, and the struggles that each person went through was more than moving. I never once found myself bored while watching, and that’s saying a lot for my adhd ass. I was invested in each and every second of that damn anime and I was never, ever left underwhelmed. That probably had to do with the fact that every. Single. Character. Had a purpose. I’m not even kidding. Every single person contributed to the big fight at the end and that alone is fucking fantastic.

Not to mention ALL the women, every female character, was a badass bitch. None of them were reduced to sex appeal or romantic subplot, they all had real feelings, real arcs and real, unadulterated badassery that I thoroughly admired and appreciated. I could watch this anime over and over again every single month and I wouldn’t get bored. Between the emotional struggle, self discovery, and personal development of each character, I promise you will not see a lack of plot or meaning here. The more you watch, the more you discover and that is not a lie. There are so many layers to its story, which only makes me wish I had watched this sooner.

There is nothing I have to offer in the ways of criticism, and for that I couldn’t be happier. Thank you, Hiromu Arakawa, for such an incredible piece of art. You deserve every bit of love that this manga/anime gets. You go girl.

1. Cowboy Bepop

Holy shit holy shit holy shit this anime is so fucking good and it has been my favorite for so damn long. I have been watching anime for years, and while some of the shows in my list have moved around, this one has yet to be bumped down from the top (and I doubt it ever will). There’s a reason it became such a cult classic.

For starters, the animation. I mean, just look at Spike and the way they animate his fighting (yes I am aware that this gif is from the movie, but that still doesn’t change my point). The sequences in the show/film have been reused in many other shows and for good reason. It’s good, incredible, actually and they make him look so badass with just a few hand movements. I was consistently impressed with the way the fight scenes were portrayed and wasn’t ever left underwhelmed or disappointed (or, for that matter, feeling like they completely over exaggerated/overcompensated the scene with huge close-ups and tons of debris and lights). I loved watching this and my heart was always pounding with every intense interaction. I didn’t feel bored during any of the episodes and always found myself laughing when they cracked a joke—pretty much all of their funny lines hit and that’s saying something, dude.

The show, while having a lighthearted surface, has a heavy meaning that you don’t see at first glance. It’s about dealing with grief and loss, and how the characters themselves accomplished that in different ways. The most prominent quote is the biggest indication of its moral “you’re gonna carry that weight”. Basically: ‘You’ve gotta pick up your baggage, because the world moves on, with or without you’. Or ‘You’re going to carry that weight whether you like it or not, because life keeps going’. When I figured out the show’s actual message, while staring at my ceiling in the long hours of the night, I almost cried. This realization brought something entirely different to the table, a new understanding of the show’s characters and overall essence.

The main characters, all of them, had depth. They had real, palpable depth, and even if you didn’t want to care you found yourself seriously interested in their lives. Each of them had relatively shitty pasts. Faye with her lost memories, Spike with Julia and the people who fucked him over, Jet with his old flame and the ISSP, Ed and her/his father... throughout the entire show we got to see how all of them dealt with these things, whether they wanted to continue on with life or not. The way they portrayed it was engaging, because the characters individual, contrasting journeys weren’t repetitive or one note. The beauty that the show holds so achinging close to its core, the layers of grief that the characters are wrapped in so delicately is almost suffocatingly real—because they’re all different. It’s something you discover when you think on the subject in a deeper light, which is another reason why I enjoy it so much. It has both a surface story and a deeper one. You can either take the show at face value or choose to understand the underlying moral.

This show inspired my very first, thoroughly fleshed out OC, and continues to inspire me to this day. It has contributed to my own personal growth, and has helped push me to continue my art and writing. It is beautifully written, beautifully executed and even though some of the episodes seem like filler, it has never disappointed me. I rewatch it all the time because there’s something so infinitely refreshing about the beauty of this anime, whether it be the way we watch the characters develop or the overall moral it portrays. This show has given us a message that is essentially timeless, it can be ‘carried’ through generation after generation, and still have the same impact—something I absolutely fucking adore.

I owe so much to this anime, including my very own artistic development. I discovered it during a really shitty time in my life and I couldn’t have asked for better timing. I will never tire of the bittersweet message or the thoroughly fucking fantastic animation. Everyone who contributed to this masterpiece deserves love, because it’s seriously fucking gold.

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merryfortune · 3 years

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Tear ducts of Coral

Fandom: Tropical Rouge PreCure

Ship: Laura/Sango

Word Count: 3.8k

Tags: Out of Character, Body Horror, Gore, Xenobiology, Unrequited Pining

Minori adjusted her glasses and blinked when something had suddenly caught her attention during the Tropical Club’s latest endeavour: script writing. She turned her head, robotically, to the side and the increasing motion in just one little square of the desks they had bumped together had gotten Sango and Asuka to notice as well. Manatsu, however, was still scribbling away at her Ultra Hyper Pineapple Squad idea, whatever that was.

“Laura, do you mind me asking a personal question?” Minori asked.

“Huh?” Laura’s hand flopped around as she lazily, but in a fashion that was oddly regal at the same time which indicated that Laura was now paying attention. Somewhat, at least. “Pardon, you want to ask a personal question?” she addressed Minori.

Her tail twitched as Laura played with her hair, all whilst she remained propped up on Manatsu’s desk. Speaking of, Manatsu was paying attention as well, she chewed on her pencil as Laura tried to decide if she wanted to answer Minori’s question or not before, ultimately, she shrugged her shoulders.

“Yes.” Minori confirmed.

Laura sighed heavily, “So long as its not too personal, I suppose I don’t mind.”

“Good, I don’t think it is too personal, but you may find it odd,” Minori prefaced her statement, “but how accurate is the human trope of mermaids who cry pearls?”

“Only happens once in a while.” Laura replied. “Sometimes its rubies, emeralds, it can be anything and everything. There have even been instances of mermaids crying seafoam, seaweed, and even sea grapes. It really depends.”

Manatsu gasped and then blinked, “What are we talking about?” she asked.

“The thought crossed my mind whilst I was adapting my novel into the script format of a movie and I recalled hearing notions of mermaids crying seafoam, and even pearls, so the curiosity struck me to ask.” Minori explained.

“I’ve never heard of any of that but I’m not exactly a mermaid otaku like you, Minorin.” Asuka said and she crossed her arms, glancing at Laura, and her brow twitched, “Argh, now I gotta know, what kind of tears do you cry, Laura? We all cry salt water, if that alleviates the burden.”

“Crying hurts so I don’t cry.” Laura replied, brusque.

“O-oh,” Sango piped up shyly, “I thought you would have looked really pretty crying tears of pearls, that’s probably a cruel thing to say.”

“It is.” Laura sniped but she looked smug about it.

Sango flinched. She hadn’t meant to be cruel about it and Laura relished the reaction. She laughed. But then when Asuka gave her a scolding glare, Laura let it go. She sighed again.

“It sounds peculiar to me, that crying doesn’t hurt.” Laura mused.

“Yep, not at all, in fact, it feels really good after.” Manatsu said. “I cried heaps on the way to Aozora when I was leaving my Dad behind on the island but whoa, I felt tropica-shining afterwards once it was all done.”

Laura cringed, she was unsettled by the idea that crying could be painless, “But I suppose unless you’ve actually experienced it, its difficult to understand but yes. Crying hurts so I don’t cry. Besides, mermaids only really cry when love is involved,” she explained, “so I don’t ‘love’ either.”

“I don’t follow?” Sango murmured.

Laura glanced at the others and sighed heavily, “I mean, yes, mermaids ‘love’ one another. We go forth, procreate, bring more spawn into the world. We love swimming and we love pretty, shiny objects but there’s a love that is uniquely human. More than a means to an end or a satisfaction of greed or lust or gluttony. We are not in possession of this feeling that I see in each and everyone of you each and every day.”

Manatsu gasped ad her face began to glitter with a huge grin. Laura’s own expression softened in return, pleasing Asuka and intriguing Sango. Regardless, Laura continued after this micro-second of a pause to her speech.

“Fittingly, it does make me envious, but every boon has its bane, so I am content not being flawed by this particular human characteristic.” Laura checked her nails and her voice quietened, not to a mumble, just became disheartened. “Of course, not every mermaid is as pragmatic as I. Hence, they cry. Poor little silly things who have gone and hurt their hearts. It’s a sickness, a contagion, and I will do anything to remain impervious to it.”

“I see.” Minori said, her voice calm and even in a way that none of the other girls’ voices could have been had they been the first to respond to Laura’s tirade. “Thank you for answering my question, I can make amendments to my script – and my novel – per this new information.”

“Your welcome.” Laura replied like she was bragging.

With that, the conversation finished and when the girls checked the time, they realised it was late enough to end club activity anyways, so they tidied up and left for the day. They parted ways thereafter with an unusual mood to them. It was sombre and peculiar. Laura seemed mostly unaffected by it, based on what she would yell from the Aqua Pot but the person who seemed most affected, but it was Sango.

She had done her very best to hide it but her old facades were more difficult for her to wear nowadays since meeting and befriending Manatsu. She couldn’t quite suppress herself and her feelings quite so adeptly nowadays. She had thought it for the better but the tremor in her heart of present was disturbing her. Asuka and Minori could both tell but they waved Sango goodbye without issue, nonetheless. Their small gestures looked so out of place beside Manatsu who waved huge arcs goodbye to her when Sango could barely muster flicks of her fingers in reply.

Sango went home and her head was swimming with Laura’s words. They were blunt but they were also morbid. Sango had never been intrigued by that sort of thing before. She was the type to be scared of her own shadow, let alone of all the bumps in the night and anything else a little unusual but this was something else. Perhaps it was because of how she pined for Laura, to know that it would be doomed because of some sort of incompatibility of emotions – that human love and mermaid love were completely different – or maybe its because she was vain.

Ruminating with this new knowledge that was ruining her, Sango stood in front of the mirror in her ensuite bathroom. On her tiptoes, she got up close enough to the mirror so that even the shallowest of her breaths fogged it, so that she could see every pore underneath her eyelid. She was the daughter of an accomplished make-up artist and seller, she would be considered scathed if she wasn’t a little bit vain and now Sango wondered what she would look like if every bout of her own cry-babyishness had caused her to be scarred. The notion of her cheeks being scarred by the rivets of tears previously shed was particularly made her shudder.

In the involuntary movement, Sango felt her heart tremor. She disliked the sensation and what lingered after it. This first twinge that something was amiss inside of herself.

She had been trying to ignore it all afternoon. To know that her crush could never come to fruition, Sango had avoided thinking about it but now her eye was all that she could see which meant all she could see was herself and her own flaws of being human. A human with a big but fragile heart, no less.

Her crush on Laura could be pinpointed to one specific catalyst: meeting her and becoming a Pretty Cure. She had been awestruck, seeing a real-life mermaid for the first time, and she had felt her heart flutter. The sound of her singing lured Sango: it was sweet, melodic, utterly incomparable to anything that she had heard before, so Sango opened that door. Beyond it, there she beheld Laura for the very first time, leaving her breathless.

She was beautiful, basking in the sun and its ray glittering off the surface of the pool as she swam through it. Elegant but slovenly. Sango knew immediately that she wanted to get closer. And so, she did. Hands on the glass, eyes wide, observing this creature that she had only seen before in the wildest of dreams and in the most fictional of fairy tales.

Given that Laura – and Manatsu – had offered to make her a Pretty Cure, Sango had assumed that maybe Laura wanted to get closer to her as well. Even if she turned her nose up at the idea of storybooks where mermaids gave up their mermaidness for humans that they fell in love with. She had thought, at the time, it was because Laura was uniquely a self-absorbed priss, but she realised now that she was wrong.

The books were wrong. Sango felt her eye grow wet as she stared at her own reflection distorted by being so close up to it. A mermaid would never give up her tail because mermaids don’t fall in love like humans do. Sango swallowed and the teardrop in her eye shone before turning into a jewel.

Sango watched, in horror, at the clear bead of her teardrop turned blood red. It streaked down her cheek and her stomach lurched with pain. A polyp branched out jaggedly from her tear duct. Sango squeaked in pain and her eyes watered. Only for that water to twist and form into a tentacle of… of… of coral.

Sango stumbled back away from the mirror. She clamped her hand over her mouth, and she willed herself not to make a noise. Not a sound. She didn’t want to disturb her mother because she didn’t know how to explain the fact that coral was growing from her tear ducts. Well, she was reasonably certain that it was coral.

These clusters that edged ever so slowly and so painfully out of her eyes were beautiful. As fearful of them as she was, Sango was awed by their innate prettiness as she tried to understand what was happening. As her vision now had criss-crosses and peculiar formations in the peripheries. Twisting, branching out like they were completely and utterly natural.

She inhaled deeply and slowly took her hand off her mouth. She could feel her eyes water but the stinging pain of calcium carbonate solidifying in the teeny tiny channels of her tear duct and the veins of her eyes was unimaginable. But she was a Pretty Cure. She would be strong and so, she tested her theory.

Very tenderly, Sango touched the scarlet polyps that were growing from her eyes where her teardrops had been cried. Her heart fluttered and her stomach twisted as every inch of her common sense told her not touch the delicate branches climbing out her eyes and yet. Sango did it. And they crumbled at her touch with immense pain.

A squeal of pain escaped Sango’s mouth and her heart leapt her throat. She heard her mother cry out, “Is something wrong, sweetie? Do you need me?” and the lie that she was okay came out her mouth just as easy as the pain. Sango swallowed and she began to cry again. Sango was harrowed as she looked at her fingertips. They were dusted with a crumbly powder that was a pinkish red. Just like coral looked in her mind. And that scared her more than the terrible sensation of cutting and ripping just under her eyes.

The fresh jolts of pain branched through her eyes and with it, came the blood. Sango was chilled as she felt these thin streaks on her cheeks, and it was a vicious cycle. Every time she was hurt, she would cry and every time she cried, she was hurt. The punishment emphasised by her mind which raced as she tried to comprehend the impossibility of what was happening to her.

Although… maybe it wasn’t all that impossible that a human in love with an actual mermaid would contract some sort of gemstone lovesickness from a mermaid. Sango felt herself grow hopeful, but it was a terrible feeling riddled with the polyps of the coral that was emerging from her tear ducts. If a mermaid had gotten her sick, maybe a mermaid could be her cure.

Sango’s hands shook as he made her way back to her bedside table, where her phone was charging. She was very calm as she took her phone off the charger. She opened it up and then her contacts app and then rang Manatsu.

“Hello! Manatsu’s phone!” she bellowed back.

Sango whimpered. The polyps protruding from her tear ducts quivered with the reverberations of Manatsu’s exuberant greeting. Sango tried not to cry but more tears escaped her eyes, mixed with blood and calcium, becoming yet more fragile branches of the coral that was growing from her face.

“Hi Manatsu… I need to see Laura.” she said softly.

“I can just put her on the phone, you know, she’s not totally out of touch with human technology.” Manatsu laughed.

Sango swallowed a strangled noise. She adored Manatsu, she really did, there could be no friend truer nor a friend more hard-headed. She wasn’t normally this abrasive but with such delicate structures spurting out her tear ducts, Sango’s tolerance for such antics was less than usual and yet, she remained sweet as sugar with Manatsu.

“Something has come up, an emergency,” she replied, strained, “so can we please meet somewhere in private?” she asked.

“Oh, okay, um… oh! What about at the cove! Its nice and private and stuff. Its close by both our houses, too!” Manatsu suggested, her voice very, very loud.

Sango winced. She could feel flakes of coral burst and twinge and sprout all over again in reaction to Manatsu’s voice, but she hazarded a smile anyway.

“That sounds good, thank you Manatsu.” Sango replied. “See you there.”

“Yeah, see ya soon.” Manatsu bade her goodbye and thankfully, she hung up first.

Sango sighed with relief. She shuddered and she felt more coral break off her eyes but at least she didn’t shed a tear with it. Though, Sango was still worried about what she looked like. Blood and dust and the like so she hobbled back into her bathroom and was sickened by her own face.

She could hardly recognise herself so frayed with fear. Her own ‘charm point’ mocked by this illness. She saw how the polyps twisted and arched on both sides of her face into sick, love-heart shaped. Her heart throbbed with the whiplash cruelty of that realisation and she felt the polyps move. Their rocky exoskeletons puncturing her veins as she shed more tears that turned into coral.

Sango put her hands over her mouth again. She felt her heart thud in her chest as she tried to power on through the pain, breathing in and out was so difficult but she tried so hard. When she achieved that shaky equilibrium again, where the cycle was temporarily diffused, she put her phone in her pocket and slipped on some shoes.

She felt awful sneaking out, but she didn’t want to worry her mother with this exotic, underwater disease. It was difficult but somehow, she made it out of the house in not too many pieces. It was cold for a late spring-early summer night, making Sango shiver and leave coral dander as she slowly made her way to the cove that Manatsu had agreed to meet her.

Sango had been there a handful of times before. It was a nice little spot that was cosy and even romantic in the daylight hours but at night, it looked a little scary. Even with the cityscape lights behind it and the stars twinkling on the ocean in front of it. Fortunately, Manatsu was there to greet Sango and she waved her down.

“Oiiii,” Manatsu called out, “over here!”

Sango was glad to see her. Tired. But nevertheless, glad to see Manatsu as she hobbled closer and Manatsu blinked. She could tell, immediately, that something was wrong with Sango; how she was trying to hide beneath her fluffy fringe and the floppy plaits by her face was uncharacteristic, even to someone as shy and repressed as Sango.

“You okay?” Manatsu asked.

“Y-Yes, I’m fine,” Sango lied, “so, um, where’s Laura? I really need to speak with her.”

“Oh, um, she’s just over there, in the water, you may have to call for her if she’s underwater, but she was floating just a minute ago.” Manatsu said and she pointed towards the eroded cove.

Even in the dark, that striking image of a twisted love-heart was apparent in the sandstone structure of the cove. The twinkle of the stars above it was dull and below it, the water lapped at the ground. Sango swallowed her fears and her tears. She flashed a smile at Manatsu that was mostly missed.

“Thank you,” Sango replied, “and do you mind giving us some privacy? This matter it’s a bit, um, a bit unusual and hard to explain.”

“Er, yeah, that’s fine, I’ll just, um, wait over there.” Manatsu pointed in the opposite direction of the cove with both her fingers.

Sango sighed with relief, “Thank you.” And yet that didn’t feel competent enough with her gratitude. Nonetheless, Manatsu awkwardly tried to exit from the cove but not too far given that she was Laura’s ride home back to the safety of Manatsu’s place.

Sango, however, began to draw closer to the water’s edge. Her heart thumped in her chest and she could feel the vibrations in the polyps dangling from her eyes by a thread. They were weakening now that she had all dried up the tears that she had wanted to shed but that didn’t make them less threatening to her senses of security in her body or self. She got down on her knees, sitting, at the edge of the cove and Laura breached.

Her eyes were suspicious and cynical, even when barely reflected by starlight bouncing off the water’s perpetually moving and choppy surface. She hiked up her arms over the edge and anchored herself like that. Her tail coming backwards, forming a crest of her back and the water’s surface.

Laura hummed, “I thought humans cried seawater and only seawater.” she teased. “Isn’t that what we established this afternoon at the club meeting?”

“Well, er, we did but…” Sango said. “But have you ever heard of such a thing?! A human who cries coral?”

Laura sighed heavily. It was too late at night for Sango to be so loud and in her exclamation, her hot flush of emotions, there was the sparkle of a possible tear in the moisture of her eyes that gleamed in the dark, framed by coral dyed a blood red in the dim. Laura made a floppy hand gesture as she was deep in thought.

“No, I haven’t.” Laura admitted. “Mermaids crying coral isn’t impossible, of course, but humans? No, not so much… But given when love is involved – and it is, isn’t it, Sango?”

“It is…” Sango murmured, and she fidgeted with the ends of her plaits.

“How trite.” Laura’s voice was pithy with disdain. “A human girl has gone and gotten a crush on a mermaid. It is called a crush, yes?”

“Yes.” Sango mumbled.

Laura wanted to laugh but something stopped her. Even though she could feel the tickle in her throat, something about Sango’s expression was too pathetic even for Laura to worsen.

“I suppose it is possible…” Laura murmured aloud in half spoken thoughts. “I did describe it as a sickness. Given that humans don’t look too dissimilar from the top half to mermaids, yes, it is entirely possible that our weaknesses of physiology are capable of transferring.” Her skin crawled. “I better not have any of your disgusting germs. No way in Triton’s good underworld am I coming down with that ghastly influenza you lot speak of.”

Sango giggled. Although, maybe it was more than a hiccup. She felt just as whiplashed by the unspoken cruelty than if Laura had just straight up addressed it with her jeering.

“But every sickness has a cure, I suppose.” Laura said.

Sango perked up, “Does that mean?” she gasped. “Can you help me?”

“I can think of something, but I have no way of knowing if it’ll cure you.” Laura replied.

“What do you mean?” asked Sango. “How do mermaids normally rid themselves of this sickness?”

“The affliction typically goes away on its own, but I believe a token of severance could go a long way.” Laura explained but it didn’t feel like an explanation.

Sango’s heart skipped a beat and she felt her shoulders prickle as she asked, “And what is a token of severance?”

“A kiss.” Laura replied all too simply on a breathless voice.

“A k-kiss?!” Sango exclaimed.

Laura stared at her idly. She didn’t think it was all that of a big deal. Being stared down by such a cold, if somewhat expressionless, look Sango calmed down. Even though her heart was racing, and she could feel the sting of coral pushing through her tear ducts again, Sango calmed down.

“If you think it’ll help…” Sango murmured.

“I do think it’ll help.” Laura quipped.

And it was upon that cue, before Sango could quite adjust or ask to go slow, Laura swooped in with a kiss. Sango made a noise, but it was smothered in the press of Laura’s lips against her own. Her eyes went wide but Laura’s, curiously, were closed. Her brows twinged as she kissed Sango as hard as she could, like she was trying to perform some sort of CPR. It was awful yet Sango didn’t hold a grudge.

She softened into the kiss. It was her very first kiss and it wasn’t happening anything like she had ever daydreamed, but it was freeing. She could feel the remaining coral in her eyes and her tear ducts crumble to nothingness. To just flecks of sand that she could bat away with her eyelashes. She felt a wet lump in her throat, and she kissed back. She wanted to be cure so badly of her pain, but she could feel the smirk in Laura’s kiss.

Self-important with nothing to spare. Perhaps even relishing having this vast power or strength over Sango since Laura deemed the humanlike ‘love’ of crushes and pining to be beneath her since it caused nothing but pain. A teardrop – yes, a real teardrop – rolled down Sango’s cheek and Laura moved her kiss to lick it. Seawater. How peculiar but she liked it even though it didn’t quite have the nostalgic taste of her underwater home, it was endearing, nonetheless.

“Thank you,” Sango whimpered, shedding more tears, not coral, “for curing me.”

Laura tutted. She pulled back from the kiss and Sango looked a mess in the starlight. Pitiful and pathetic, crying her tears of seawater.

#femslash #tropical rouge pretty cure #tropical rouge #precure #laura (precure)#suzumura sango #sango suzumura #laura x sango #sango x laura #cure coral #cure la mer #writing tag #if this fic is what gets me kicked from r slash precure i'm gonna be sad bc its really not that risque

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silverbastardgoldenfool · 4 years

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Realm of the Quarantine Reread End-of-Book Questionnaire: Royal Assassin

Any differences between your first/previous reading experience and this one?

Not as stark a difference as with Assassin’s Apprentice, but definitely still there. Apart from all the obvious stuff, like feeling much more attached to the characters already and picking up more details, I think the biggest change was a complete lack of patience for the teen romance drama lol. There was a decent period where I was feeling quite frustrated with it. Not that I loved it the first time round, but back then I had a very different view of how it fit into the story. I saw it as teaching Fitz a depressing lesson of what it really means to be a royal bastard and a king’s man. Fitz’s literal need (for all he knows he would have been killed if not for his deal with Shrewd) and sense of duty to put his loyalty to his king and country first creates a relationship that is toxic, turbulent and built on lies. And teenage horniness masquerading as love. I saw all that the first time and thought it was just something he had to go through. Now I know it’s something he never really goes through but rather grips onto, romanticises and ultimately goes back to. I know the point of that is meant to be that he finally gets to have something for himself, but why it had to be Molly specifically??? I have very few qualms with Robin’s writing choices overall, but why she chose to write their relationship this way if they really are meant to be is beyond me, especially when so many of her other romances are written so well - it feels like it can’t possibly be unintentional. For most of this book they’re either fighting or fucking and honey! That ain’t love! Hell, Fitz all but sees her as just another demand on his time as the book goes on. But he can’t let her go because she’s the one thing he can point to that makes him feel normal. Not happy, not cherished, not safe. Normal. She’s simply a refuge from his real life. He literally says to Chade “I need her.” I find that so telling, man. It’s not really about her, which is a shame because Molly is great. They’re just really not good for each other.

So yeah. It’s just kind of trying to read all the Fitz/Molly stuff when you know and don’t like what it ultimately culminates in. At the same time… Bee… So I will always be conflicted lol. I just can’t separate the events of Royal Assassin from the furious disappointment I felt when I finished Fool’s Fate. Perhaps I’ll have a new Fool’s Fate experience this time that will make the next re-read a bit easier in regards to Fitz and Molly? But I won’t bet on it lol.

Anyway. It’s not as if I haven’t already said just about everything there possibly is to say about Fitz and Molly yet I also feel like I could go on about it forever. Luckily this is kind of as bad as it gets in terms of how much “screen time” they actually get (apart from Fool’s Assassin maybe? But they don’t bother me too much in that) so yay! I made it! And hopefully it’ll be a good few books before y’all have to endure my ranting about it again :)) Also hopefully this doesn’t give the impression that this read was more bad than good? It was mostly just a particular angsty chunk before they properly get together that was a bit of a slog to get through, but overall I really loved reading this book again and got a lot out of it.

Something you can’t believe you forgot

That Molly punches Fitz in the face hard enough that he bleeds and that Fitz fully intended to punch the Fool for asking if Molly was preggo before seeing he had already been beaten. I pretend I do not see it.

Favourite character introduction moments/scenes

Omfg I was just about to say “huh we didn’t really get any major character intros in this book” bitch Nighteyes???? But in my defence I just. Cannot process the fact that Nighteyes is only really in 3 of 16 books he just feels omnipresent to me BUT his introduction is most definitely iconique and god I love him and he made me cry eight thousand times!

Favourite character arcs

Speaking of Nighteyes: what a glow up. He goes from angry, scared, untrusting little bb to……. Nighteyes. Like. How does one even describe the kind of person Nighteyes becomes. He’s just Nighteyes and I love him with all my fuckin heart!! He is Fitz’s constant… He is wise… He is silly… a comedic genius…… a big, open, unconditional heart. Incomparable. I can’t believe I’ve seen ppl saying they dislike/d Nighteyes……. Honey…… it’s called taste xx

Favourite quote/s

Again no tabs so it’s a bit harder to keep track but there were a few that stuck out enough to copy down. There are a lot of iconic quotes in this book that get shared a lot so I only bothered with ones I didn’t remember.

- “I wince to think of the price willingly paid for loving me.”

- “My soft, clean bed beckoned, like a soft, clean tomorrow.” (mood)

- “I looked and saw they were both made of hungers, like containers made of emptiness.”

Favourite relationships

Kettricken/Verity obviously. I was shocked by how little time they actually have together being in love before Verity leaves??? Because all I remembered was how strong their love is. But the whole journey towards that love is what makes it stand out as an actual compelling story in its own right. This is definitely one of Robin’s greatest skills as a writer; giving the minor characters depth by giving them their own relationships that grow and change and have a life of their own outside of Fitz. It makes the world feel so much more alive.

Also Burrich/Fitz in this book continues to be bittersweet, but with a lot more sweet in there than usual! They fully start out this book as a team. Burrich calling Fitz “FitzChivalry” makes me fuckin emo and idk why even. Burrich does seem to start seeing Fitz a lot more as his own person in this book which changes their dynamic in some rly nice ways. The fact that towards the end of the book Burrich even uses the wit to help Fitz is enough to make me cry tbh - and writing this has made me realise that I’m officially past any uncomplicated good times between Burrich and Fitz y’all mind if I fuckin die real quick!!

Fitz/Verity is soy pure and beautiful. Fitz and the Fool is always, always compelling and complex and tender and perfectly mysterious. But overall you’d have to say Fitz/Nighteyes, hey? They are literally meant to be, in a way so straightforward and undeniable and beautifully simple that I never really know what to say about it. Little brother!!! :’) They literally make me cry all the frickin time lol rip!

Favourite setting

There aren’t that many to choose from in this book! Ima go with the skill river bc hey, Robin’s magic systems are so unique and beautiful and the fact that the skill is written as a kind of a place is really frickin cool and deserves a shoutout.

Favourite chapter

The final chapter (not the epilogue) ummm broke my heart but it is written so beautifully, oh my god, it’s like an out of body experience. I feel like this is kind of when RotE becomes RotE - the first time it really goes to that place that is so fitting yet so unexpected, so beautiful, so tragic, so awful, so visceral. Making use of the genre to really test the limits of humanity; to see how far you can bend a person without breaking them and then refusing to turn away from the consequences. Idk man!! I don’t know how to describe it without sounding like a pretentious dick but it really is that intense and strange and overwhelming for me. There is something in that moment, when Burrich pulls Fitz’s body out of the earth and Fitz/Nighteyes is recoiling from it and deeply terrified… Something about the enormity of the existential questions raised converging with the pinpoint specificity of it all being wrapped up in the story of a character that feels so real and who you care about so deeply… It’s almost written like a horror scene, but that’s not quite the feeling. It’s just the RotE feeling; there are multiple throughout all five series, and it’s what makes these books unlike any other.

Most loved character

Fitz, Nighteyes, the Fool all had my entire heart this book. The Fool is just so sad and pathetic and literally must be protected!! I think I’m kind of obsessed with Burrich? Also I think I almost forgot how much I love Kettricken? She’s a complete badass of course but she’s also got the biggest goddamn heart like…. Who said she was allowed to be such a beautiful person???

But god, everyone. I love them all.

Most hated character

What can I say? Regal is disgostang. Wall Ass a close second.

Raise your hand if you’ve been personally victimised by Robin Hobb (most heartbreaking and/or visceral moments)

Shall I list just a few? :)

- Burrich screaming at Fitz through the bars of his jail cell, horrible things you can’t help but feel are at least a little bit true

- Burrich sobbing over Fitz’s dead body repeating, “You aren’t dead, you aren’t dead.”

- Fitz going to Nighteyes before everything went down on the night of the coronation and just fuckin hugging him really tight

- Fitz trying desperately to leave his broken vessel behind but not quite being able to disown his body

- The Fool being beaten

- The Fool being beaten again

- The Fool sprawled and weeping across Shrewd’s dead body

- The Fool really believing for a moment that Fitz had betrayed him and killed Shrewd

- Fitz tending the Fool’s wounds………. bitch….

- Chade giving Fitz a chance to escape with them and Fitz going to kill Serene and Justin instead

- Idk why this is even that sad but Nighteyes saying the only person he loves is Fitz!

- The entire incident with the forged ones literally tearing apart a three year old girl, which I had completely blocked out until now :)

- The fact that Fitz continues to be reminded and traumatised by this incident for the remainder of the book beCAUSE HE IS A GOOD BOY. A VERY GOOD BOY WITH A VERY GOOD HEART.

- Fitz repelling at Nighteyes to try and force their bond broken

- LITTLE BROTHER

- WOLVES HAVE NO KINGS

- High off his face Fitz calling Patience “mother” no shut the fuck up!!!!

Details, observations, spoilery notes made with the benefit of the full picture

- I’ve been trying for ages to decipher when the Fool started falling for Fitz, and I think I’m officially putting my money on their last interaction in AA. “I wish I had a place that was as much me as that place is you.” I mean. If someone said that to me… I’m not a slut but who knows, ya know? (I know this is more a note for the last book but I thought of it while reading this book. So shh.)

- It’s so clear to see this time how much Fitz’s sense of self and politics are affected by his time in the Mountains. He obviously feels much more inclined to their way of thinking about royalty and sacrifice and equality and returns to Buckkeep with a self-respect he’s never really had before. Weird how being among people who don’t just think of you as The Bastard will do that.

- It’s no wonder Fitz becomes so fixated on Molly; he literally has almost nothing else to occupy him and no companionship when she suddenly shows up

- It’s gross that he spies on her, obviously, but you can’t not take into account the fact that Chade has been teaching him since he was ten that this is justifiable behaviour; a reasonable way to gather information and get what you want. Fitz’s lack of social awareness goes further than him just being a little awkward; he has literally been trained to believe the only thing wrong with stalking would be getting caught.

- I’ve seen a few people talk about the fact that Regal isn’t appropriately punished as if it’s bad writing and like, while it is frustrating, it is supposed to be frustrating - it is not a plot hole. It made sense to me the first time I read it and it was even more obvious this time; Regal has the loyalty of the inland duchies. If he were to be publicly punished those dukes would rally behind him and raise hell, and Regal would no longer need to play the part of the dutiful prince. Even if Regal died a “natural” death - something I can’t see Shrewd or Verity orchestrating anyway - the inland dukes would feel that they no longer have a Farseer on their side and may, again, raise hell. It’s a delicate balance that would be outrageously difficult not to topple if you removed Regal from the equation. There is a lot more to it than I’ll bother writing here but yeah. I don’t really know how people can read this book and think that Regal retaining his life and position is some sort of lazy plot contrivance. It was all set up in the first book dude.

- Fitz and Nighteyes meeting in this book is the perfect metaphor for our need for connection versus the fear of inevitable loss. Fitz’s experience tells him that entering into a bond with an animal can only end in pain, yet he can’t resist it. In real life this is especially true with humans and our animal companions, since they almost always have a shorter lifespan than us; signing up to love them is signing up to lose them. But the same is also true of our relationships with other humans. And like Fitz, we have all had our fair share of loss and pain. We all have our reasons to be afraid of the connection we naturally crave. Sometimes we give in to the fear to the point of holding ourselves back from it entirely. That’s where Fitz is at when he meets Nighteyes. But what’s so beautiful about their arc as a metaphor is that it suggests that these connections, if we submit to them, are what keep our vital spark alive. Even when Nighteyes dies later in the series, the sentiment always remains, essentially, “It’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.” Ya boi is projecting bc it’s hard to be vulnerable and make friends as an adult, but I think the observation stands. Love and connection and vulnerability are key threads that run throughout all of Fitz’s story, but in this book it is best represented through him and Nighteyes.

- “I hoped I would not become too adept at lying to myself.” Honey, you got a big storm comin.

- Very inch resting (gay) that Fitz finds it hard to meet the Fool’s eyes. I know almost everyone does bc his eyes are weird, but I reserve the right to reach and I will absolutely NOT be accepting criticism.

- I find it interesting that Fitz says Kettricken’s wit is not strong just because she doesn’t use it exactly the way he does

- I know it’s not meant to be funny but……. The way Fitz described losing his virginity had me literally laughing out loud

- Fitz was really like “okay i better go break my bond with Nighteyes” just cos he and Molly fucked. Teenagers don’t deserve rights.

- You know what? I really, really appreciate how fucking weird these books are lol. What other author would use their magic system to have their characters accidentally intruding on each other’s awkward sex stuff? Okay, maybe a few, but they would do it to be like, edgy and sexy. Robin Hobb just does it to make you cringe so hard you lose several years off of your life.

- But seriously, even apart from the cringe stuff, these books get so strange and out there and like! That’s what magic is for!

- Bruh. When Fitz is like “omg poor Verity…. He’ll never have what i have with Molly” I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone encapsulate the self-important delusion of teen romance so perfectly lol. Wow.

- Okay some Fitz/Fool stuff that made me lose my tiny mind. Sorry.

- Fitz literally said about the Fool “he burned too brightly” I WILL DIE.

- Fitz is always like, irritated by the Fool… yet positively delighted by his presence at the same time…… okay bitch

- Inch resting how Fitz has always been uncomfortable with the Fool getting serious. I don’t quite know how to put my thoughts on this into words so like. I’ll just put it there. Make of it what you will.

- “Sit on my clothes chest and take your shirt off…” i stopped fucking breathing noah fence

- “I ran my fingers lightly down the line of his jaw, and around his eye socket. At least no bone seemed damaged. ‘Who did this to you?’ I asked him.” my GOD this is literally textbook gay/romance. It hurts me. It physically hurts me.

- Straight from my notes: “I can’t even focus on reading this bc it’s the first time they are tending each other’s wounds and I am a homosexual!” and “the gays are quaking!! (it’s me I’m the gays)

- Okay wow! I think that’s it! Hello if you made it this far! Hope this was remotely coherent and I’m always keen to hear your thoughts on my thoughts :)

Anyone doing a reread feel free to fill this out! You don’t have to use the tag :)

#rote #realm of the elderlings #royal assassin #royal assassin spoilers #fitzchivalry farseer #realm of the quarantine

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