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wives-natlho · 9 months

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Acceptance

Athena gripped the crystal in her hand so tightly that her knuckles popped. This was it. The day that most Sharlayans both anticipated and dreaded. Evaluation day…the day she earned her archon mark. She looked around the Sharylayan pavilion one more time, mentally scanning…for the 20th time that everything was in place. Given her presentation consisted of four things, it was a pretty short checklist. There was the table with the axe, the crystal in her hands, the training dummy and a middle-aged Hellsguard by the name of Hidden Pinnacle dressed in classical warrior attire. She honestly still couldn't believe she lucked out in finding a warrior willing to come to Sharlayan, even if it meant he'd get a free weapon. Sure, it's one of a kind, but when he first got the message he had no way of knowing it would work. A clearing of a throat made her look over, it seemed the old farts had gathered and were ready to start…as evident by a more, louder throat clear. By The Twelve these old codgers were a pain.

She stepped forward crystal in hand and scanned the faces before her. Most of them were professors she didn't recognize of various races wearing the traditional garb, pretty typical for this sort of thing. It "was more authentic" or whatever excuse they used to pull in the most old and traditionalist of the cranks. Being fair and just was rarely a reason for any Sharylayan rule, normally it was about making sure “traditional values” were maintained. Which was just a different way to say “change bad”. Luckily the head was one professor that had her back, an old friend of the family, Professor Aknir. A kind Veira who’s compassion for her students was only rivaled by her love of discovery. However…that's odd, her parents weren't here yet? They must have been running behind.

She took a deep breath and donned the best metaphorical mask she could. One most young Sharlayans were familiar with when appeasing the geezers. "Welcome! Thank you for coming and conducting my evaluation!" She gave a modest bow. "My thesis is over Emotional Aetheric Synthesis: How Emotions Can Enhance Various Performances With Training And Emotional/Aetheric Conductive Tools. You all should have received the written part of my thesis already." She gave a quick glance to confirm. She motioned to Hidden Pinnacle to step forward. "I was inspired to do my research on emotions when I learned about the warriors of the Hellsguard. People who do not fear their emotions or see them as negative but instead as something to be understood and harnessed. For them, it's the rage of the inner beast. At first a very raw fire but through training is much more akin to a blacksmith's flame, respected and harnessed” Athena moved about during her presentation remembering the lessons her parents gave her. Enough to not seem stilted but not enough that it makes it seem like you are putting on a performance. Strike the balance. Gods she hated every moment of this.

“Given the nature of Sharlayan society and even some other cultures teach that emotions are almost always a negative thing, especially in what would be considered to some as excessive, I couldn't help but be fascinated." (Especially given how much I get fed up with you all trying to control me. She thought to herself) "However, the warriors have years of training, culture, tradition, and even soul crystals. Their style is also very particular. How could this philosophy be applied to other areas?" She held up the crystal in her hands. "I followed an ancient thought process and it bore fruit. Emotions are more than just chemical reactions in our bodies, they also seem to be a tangible force. At least that is my theory. The research is thin and I wasn't allowed in any restrictive sections" At this, she glared over at one of the professors in general. The one from the library who refused every one of her requests.

"However, upon some experimenting, I found that it is actually possible to crystallize emotions which proved my theory at least highly probable. I used these crystallized emotions to help find a material that was conductive to emotions." She then pointed at the axe. "Using this material, i have, with the help of some of our local blacksmiths, created an axe that should enhance Hidden Pinnacle's warrior's abilities." She nodded over to him. He flashed her a grin and walked over and grabbed the axe. As he turned to face the professors he activated it and the axe glowed as if the blade was coated in fire. Athena couldn’t help but smile, regardless of the outcome she knew she had made a friend in HP who was doing a poor job trying to stay professional. His attempts at keeping his huge grin at bay only resulted in a goofy half-scowl.

HP, after a moment to compose himself, walked over to the nearby placed training dummy and swung once. After a moment the dummy split in two and both parts fell to the ground in a perfect mirror of each other. Hidden Pinnacle hoisted the axe on his shoulder, obviously pleased with his display. Athena was honestly jealous and hoped the blacksmith would come through and make her another one. She certainly paid for it.

She turned to the professors who had broken out in quiet mummers after HP cut the dummy in twain. She stepped forward again and held up a hand. "I'm very aware of the concerns that my research might bring up in some of you. Sharlayan is not known for its love of war. However, this was the easiest concept to prove in my limited time frame since Hidden Pinnacle already has training with welding his emotions. My proposal is that this research has other applications, the most obvious next step would be the arts. Can you imagine a cook who could literally put their passion in their dishes? A writer who could put his emotions in their writing? A tailor who literally puts love into the stitches?" She paused for dramatic effect, she hated how much these evaluations were like an Ul'dahn syndicate leader trying to hawk their wares. "This is the conclusion of my practical demonstration. I have a lot of faith in this research and I hope I have done a good job inspiring faith in you all as well. Thank you for your time." She bowed once again. When she stood back up the professors had already gone to their little huddle. She scanned the area again…that's weird? Still no signs of her parents.

Suddenly everything is gone. The pavilion, the professors, even the sky. All around her is blackness as far as the eye can see. The only thing in the entirety of existence is a single figure In front of her. An Elezen messenger and between them and her, floating to the ground after she dropped, it is a letter…The Letter. The last thing she hears before she lurches in bed is "I'm sorry…The Nathlos are dead"

-----

Athena gasps and grips her heart as she launches herself upright in bed. She glances around trying to regain a semblance of calm. The first thing she notices is she's at home. To her relief and disappointment, Coco was out….Athena had come in late helping Johnson with his damn sheep again. (This time she was almost crushed by a rockslide). It was Coco’s day off so she must have gone shopping or something. As her heart rate returned to normal, she couldn't help the tears or sob that forced their way up. That damn fucking dream again. She got up and went to her weapon rack, pulled up a nearby chair, and sat down, and stared at her axe. She pulled out her family's ring (one of the few things recovered) and rubbed her thumb over it. A little ritual she picked up over the years.

Athena wasn’t terribly superstitious, but after two weeks straight she couldn’t keep ignoring the dream. After her parents died she left Sharlayan. She couldn’t even bring herself to accept her archon mark. The awful things she heard them say about her parents, about her. The presentation and concept was just too good to ignore, but it didn’t mean she would have had a good life there. Her parents were part of a sect that believed that Sharlayan can do more to help the world. That it needed to do more to help the world. As she became of age, she also agreed with these principles. What was the point in hoarding wealth of any kind? And knowledge was certainly a type of wealth. She wasn’t even sure how her parents died. All the letter had said was that they “had died on a mission” no further details were given no matter how hard she pressed. A part of her couldn’t shake the possibility of foul play.

She would never set foot in that hellhole again. She would prove them wrong, she would use HP’s contacts and become a warrior herself. She’d go out and help people…

Athena let out a long sigh. However, she couldn’t deny what she knew now in hindsight. That hellhole was her home. There were plenty of people who shared her family's vision and cared for her even if they were not her immediate family. Somehow over the years, they had managed to make contact after some of her exploits in the maelstrom…They had been keeping an eye out because they were worried. She had people back there who were worried she had died. Given how close she had gotten a few times, it certainly didn’t help the new found guilt.

She looked down at the ring. It was gold with some green gems embedded in it to create The Ewer of Thaliak. The crest of her family. What would her parents think? She had kept the secret training sessions with HP from them while he was there. They had no idea she honestly wanted to take on more warrior training…which certainly didn’t hurt her desire to leave. Not like her parents were against that obviously. Also, how was she doing anything meaningful? Since she was only on contract and the war had progressed so far that they didn’t really feel comfortable sending someone who wasn’t rank and file so far away. Not much was going on anyway on the front anyway. She did odd jobs here and there but was this really what had called her in the first place?

Would her parents be proud?

She didn’t believe in all that nonsense of single people making history. That’s not how societies worked! No person exists without the aid and sacrifice of others. No, the problem here is fulfillment. She wasn’t feeling challenged enough and had gotten into a slump. What is it she is supposed to do? What was it she was missing?

“Hey!” A voice suddenly sounded right next to her head causing Athena to jump up and fall over the backside of the chair, toppling both her and the chair over backwards….there might have been an undignified noise between a caterwaul and a scream.

Coco stifled a laugh. “Are you okay?”

Athena lay on the ground for a few moments before opening her eyes, seeing the face of her wife not too far from her own. She groaned and moved to sit up, pushing Coco a little out of the way. She rubbed the back of her head where a knot was probably forming and sighed. “Honestly, not particularly”

The smile disappeared from Coco’s face. “That same dream again?” She sat down on the floor next to Athena.

“Yeah” she answered back as she reached across the floor to pick up where the ring had fallen.

“I was trying to figure out why it keeps happening”

“Any luck?”

A scowl formed on Athena’s face as she started rubbing the ring again. “I have no idea” she then proceeded to tell Coco what had been on her mind. She felt like she was close but was missing something obvious.

“It doesn’t fit, right? The ring. Ever think about getting it re-sized?”

Athena looked a little confused and tilted her head. “ I’ve gone back and forth on it. It’s just…wearing it means I recognize I'm…it. I’m officially the new head of the Natlhos, well we both would be…I mean it doesn’t matter, it's not like there are any others but us, however it still feels like a big step…” She trailed off as she realized she was starting to ramble.

“I mean… Maybe that’s it. Maybe you figured it out, but you just need to take that final step.” Coco paused. “I mean the acceptance, not the ring itself. But maybe we could make a ceremony out of it or something.” Coco smiled and sprung to her feet. She shifted quickly to her wardrobe. “I’ve got the perfect dress for it, actually!”

Athena stood up with her but paused, normally watching Coco change and get dressed was one of her favorite things…for a variety of reasons. However, something struck a chord. She looked down at the ring, the Ewer. Her family had chosen it because it represented the flow of knowledge from the scholar. The river can’t flow if it’s cut off from the source. Acceptance….She had to go back.

Fuck

“I…have to go back”

“Really!?”, Coco whined “You just got back. I swear, this is why I retired from the Maelstrom. Gods.” She would have continued rambling about military life probably for the rest of the day, but Athena cut her off by shaking her head and waving her arms a little.

“No no no, not back to the front. Gods know they don’t need me for shit anymore. I mean Sharlayan! I have to go back to Sharlayan.”

Coco paused. The door of the wardrobe was between the two of them. Athena only saw Coco’s feet pause in place. A few seconds of silence later, her head poked out from behind the door. “Oh… You mean BACK back…” She walked over to Athena and gently put her hand on the side of her wife’s face. “You sure you’re ready?”

Athena signed and placed a hand on top of Coco’s and looked up at her and grinned “Fuck no, but I think I have to at this point if I ever want to sleep again.”

Coco smiled. “Alright. I’ll pack a bag.”

Athena took a step back surprised but smiling “I appreciate the support but let’s focus on just getting the ring resized first, not to mention I’ll need to contact some people on the inside”

“Oh, right.” Her eyes widened. “They don’t even take people into port, right?”

Athena shrugged, “It’s a little complicated depending on the circumstance. The average Sharlayan isn’t heartless and there are also merchants, however, immigration can be…a pain. However, because of my ties, I can speed up the process by….probably six months. Gods this is a horrible idea." She covered her face with her hand.

Coco’s eyebrows shot up at the ‘six months’ statement. “Okay, then. You get started on that,” She smiled wide. “While I go to Ul’Dah to go shopping for a goldsmith and a new dress! We can do the ceremony at the tavern!” Coco returned to her wardrobe and picked through her outfits. She continued to prattle on about party plans and jewelry as long as Athena allowed.

While listening Athena leaned back against the wall and took one last look at the slightly oversized ring. The one she watched her mother put on more times than she could count. It wasn’t a goodbye per say but it was a big step…acceptance. She clutched the ring into her hand “May the rivers of knowledge and wisdom flow” she murmured to the back of her hand as she turned to give her wife her full attention. By the Twelve was she not looking forward to the paperwork.

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