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ceescedasticity · 6 years

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Scedasticity’s ofic family kudzu master post

(mostly so i can keep track of who’s shown up... wow this is longer than I was expecting)

“The Aquitaine Incident” (trigger warning)

Cathal Faerbaen

Gebhard Schwarzwald’s Dysfunctional Family

Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About (trigger warning)

Chernobog and Avdotya’s Reign of Terror (trigger warning)

Belenes-Elgezabal Gascony Feud

Tenth-Century Greenland

Decline and Fall of the de Lares Montium

The Faerbaens vs. British Politics

Egle Wolflin vs. Her Siblings’ Love-Lives

The Schwarzwald Bargain

al-Djinni

Alfven

Asuryas

Belenes (Complete Belenes tree)

Coppenal

di Larsmontim / de Lares Montium / other variations

Faerbaen

Felices

ha-Nef

Koszcey

Llyrion (Complete Llyrion tree)

Oshunmare

Schwarzwald

Tuathdan

Wolflin

DARRAS AL-DJINNI AL-ANDALUS b. 956: Started a fight but it never did get violent (Decline and Fall of the de Lares Montium, postlude)

KASIF AL-DJINNIYYAH b. 900: Really that would be enough to make anyone leave (Decline and Fall of the de Lares Montium, 3/5)

AMINA AL-ZAHRA b. 740: Was peripherally connected to the Aquitaine Incident but her notes aren’t really about that so I’m mostly sure I didn’t include her there…

IDHUNN ALFVEN b. 821: This situation is unacceptable so let’s blame EVERYBODY (“The Aquitaine Incident”, 6/6)

SEREJS ALFVEN b. 896: The Alfvens go to Eastern Europe! Okay, actually that was his dad, Serejs was born there.

VALBRAND ALFVEN: I mean if you want to be charitable he wasn’t taught not to (“The Aquitaine Incident”, 3/6)

VALDÍS ALFVEN b. 960: Xenophobia cannot defeat the lure of discovery and lucrative intercontinental smuggling (Tenth-Century Greenland, ¼ probably)

VIDHARR ALFVEN b. 960: Not the most knowledgeable tour guide ever… (Tenth-Century Greenland, 3/4 probably)

BELATZ ANJANAS: Fortunately Faery realm social politics aren’t free of groundless rumormongering, either, so he probably wasn’t caught totally off guard

MANISH ASURYAS b. 1750: It could also have been better

PERIYANACCI ASURYAS b. 1288: Politics? Carefully calculated appearance calibration? *bats eyelashes* Me?

SUDARSHAN ASURYAS b. 1778: It was worth a shot, anyway.

ALIBERTA BELENES: The Vikings were QUITE bad enough, the whole mortal virginity obsession thing was NOT needed (“The Aquitaine Incident”, 2/6)

AURÉLIE BELENES b. 1958: Seriously Aurélie you’re a strong enough Faeblood thirty is barely STARTING your prime

DENIS BELENES b. 1262 and MARGUERITE DE PROVINS: tbh she’s the one the entry’s about (The Belenes-Elgezabal Gascony Feud, 5/7)

DONAR BELENES: Angry; grieving; hurt; NOT HELPING (“The Aquitaine Incident, 4/6)

ESTIENNE BELENES b. 1231: Aaaaaand not just arguing. (Belenes-Elgezabal Gascony Feud, 4/7)

GENEVIEVE BELENES b. 1751: It just. Wasn’t her country or her cause.

GILBERT BELENES b. 1040 and ELFLEDA SILVATICA: Gilbert we’re trying to be STRATEGIC here

GUILLAUME BELENES b. 1198: Arguing… (Belenes-Elgezabal Gascony Feud, 2/7)

KEMEN BELENES b. 851 and THORKATLA ALFVEN b. 850: Making peace, 28 years after “the Aquitaine Incident”

MAXIMILIEN BELENES b. 1777: Probably got written off as stupid more than he should have (also Marie Mercier)

REGINHARD BELENES b. 982: He probably could have regained more functionality if he’d gone to Thalassan or Gahn Nef for help but he had other things to do

THERESE BELENES b. 986: RUDE, Liban, very rude

THIERRY BELENES, 1165-1203: He really can’t be blamed for the cover story, having been dead at the time

CORNELIA COPPENAL b. 1874: Maker of questionable race-related designer baby choices & igniter of ensuing controversy

DIEDERIK COPPENAL b. 1799: You may notice some verbatim overlap with Linnet, sorry

DIEDERIK COPPENAL b. 1954: No, really (read after Hubrecht)

HUBRECHT COPPENAL b. 1909: [cue up video of that person in the bird of paradise costume doing the display dance]

ULRIKA-MARIE COPPENAL b. 1846: Enough is enough, sheesh

GAIUS DE LARES MONTIUM: Had a good idea, but it sort of backfired on him (Decline and Fall of the de Lares Montium, actually 2/5)

MARIA DE LARES MONTIUM b. 929: Also noping… (Decline and Fall of the de Lares Montium, 5/5)

PANDOLFINUS DE LARES MONTIUM a.k.a. BUNDAR AL-DJINNI b. 925: Yeah, he’s noping out of this trainwreck. (Decline and Fall of the de Lares Montium, 4/5)

PANDOLFUS DE LARES MONTIUM b. 871: The de Lares Montium family is not doing so hot (Decline and Fall of the de Lares Montium, 1/5)

LYNDWEN DE MYRDDIN: As someone more than half Faery, who lives in the Faery realm, but with significant human ancestry, Lyndwen is a Mortal-blood. The de Myrddins are a Mortal-blood family.

NEREUS DE MYRDDIN: …Ooops?

PERSEPHONE DE MYRDDIN: Possibly born sometime in the eighteenth century? It’s really hard to tell sometimes.

ELLEN DEXTER: AWKWARD. (The Faerbaens Bet Too Much On British Politics, 5/8)

FULGENZIO DI LARSMONTIM b. 1904: There are… multiple reasons, not all of them covered here, most people are happy to embrace a joke on Fulgenzio

VESPASIANO DI LARSMONTIM: The weird apostrophes seem not to show up on my actual blog!

VITTORIA DI LARSMONTIM b. 1941: Cornelia this is all your fault (okay not really)

ALDONTZA ELGEZABAL b. 1530: Cut your losses and go on

ARGIÑE ELGEZABAL b. 1165: Arguing… (Belenes-Elgezabal Gascony Feud, 3/7)

BASAJAUN ELGEZABAL b. 1299: It was his idea (The end of the Felices, 3/5)

BIKENDI ELGEZABAL b. 1323: Most likely little if any of it was his idea (The end of the Felices, 2/5)

EKAITZ ELGEZABAL b. 1265: Didn’t start it, but REALLY wanted to finish it (and not like this) (Belenes-Elgezabal Gascony Feud, 6/7)

LOPEITZA ELGEZABAL b. 1565: A lot of expectations, but not as many as Llewella, since no one was expecting her to go retake the nonexistent stronghold

NAHIA, KOLDOBIKA, and AINTZANE ELGEZABAL: There’s probably more that could be written about them and hasn’t been (The end of the Felices, 5/5)

NEKANE ELGEZABAL b. 1349: Could have officially become Nekane Felices, if other families hadn’t gotten suspicious of her father (The end of the Felices, 4/5)

URRACA ELGEZABAL b. 1530: Not the irresponsible twin per se, but certainly the more exciting one

ADAIR ELPHINSTONE b. 1710: Not the first or the last Elphinstone to be a little too emphatic about the family’s minor status, but one of the best remembered

LINNET ELPHINSTONE b. 1799: How ya gonna keep ‘em, down on the farm…

ANEIRIN FAERBAEN b. 1642 and CAOIMHE TUATHDAN b. 1652: It’s pronounced “Keavy”. I think.

ANGHARAD FAERBAEN b. 1614: DAMMIT. (The Faerbaens Bet Too Much On British Politics, 9/8: They do NOT bet too much but still get burned)

BRANWEN FAERBAEN b. 1328: DAMMIT. (The Faerbaens Bet Too Much On British Politics, 4/8)

CARYS FAERBAEN b. 1714: Just came out to have a good time and is… definitely having a good time

CATHAL FAERBAEN: But he WASN’T an evil sorcerer!

CERIDWEN FAERBAEN b. 1271: She’s not asking you, she’s telling you (The Faerbaens Bet Too Much On British Politics, 3/8)

GLENYS FAERBAEN b. 1204: Dammit. (The Faerbaens Bet Too Much On British Politics, 1/8)

GWILYM FAERBAEN: You really can’t blame him. (The Faerbaens Bet Too Much On British Politics, 2/8)

IORWERTH FAERBAEN b. 1745: Some people aren’t cut out for parenting really

LÍADAN FAERBAEN: Beating people up in continental Europe was supposed to be her father’s thing (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 13/22)

LLEWELLA FAERBAEN b. 1403: Had a lot of expectations to deal with (The Faerbaens Bet Too Much On British Politics, 7/8)

LOWELL FAERBAEN: Also a lot of expectations (The Faerbaens Bet Too Much On British Politics, 8/8)

RHODRY FAERBAEN b. 1581: As long as I’ve got the tree handy…

ENRIC FELICES b. 1241: Just the arbitrator (Belenes-Elgezabal Gascony Feud, 7/actually 7 it turns out)

EULALIA FELICES b. 1330: It definitely sucked to be her, it’s not clear how much of that was her husband’s fault (The end of the Felices, 1/5)

FERRAN FELICES b. 799: Not helping and also not really invited (“The Aquitaine Incident”, 5/6)

ALAINNE and SUSANE FILSELFE: They did TRY to get things settled. (Belenes-Elgezabal Gascony Feud, 1/7)

ELGIVA FREWER b. 1725: Even most first-generation halfbloods end up at least materially comfortable, Faery do that much to provide, buuuut sometimes someone slips through the cracks. They often make it through on Faery-fueled luck and charisma anyway.

LIUDVIKA GIEDRIUS b. 1784: Back to an actual Koszcey-by-blood this time, not that it’s advisable to call her that (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 17/22)

MARIOTA GYLDENHELS: Right, but also English. (The Faerbaens bet too much on British politics, 6/8)

LEAH HA-NEF b. 1825: least foot-draggy of the big damn heroes (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 15/22)

SCOLASTER HA-NEF b. 1308 and IBRAHIM BEN ELIJAH: One tragedy among many, but it always stings more when you think you could have stopped it

IRUNE, IZAR, ILUNTSO, and IZOTZ ITURRIZA b. 1635, 1636, 1637, and 1638: The kids didn’t do anything wrong… I mean we can’t be 100% sure ANYONE did anything wrong, it just really looks that way

KAMINOJISOU MINORU b. 1749: He… presumably had his reasons…?

AFANASI KOSZCEY “THE PREVIOUS” Part 1, born in original body sometime before 1590, died for real in 1805 (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 1/22)

AFANASI KOSZCEY “THE PREVIOUS” Part 2, born in original body sometime before 1590, died for good in 1805: he was bad before and now he’s worse (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 6/22)

AFANASI KOSZCEY b. 1757: the original one, as in not the body-stealer (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 5/22)

AFANASI KOSZCEY b. 1790 “THE NEXT-TO-LAST”: Really dodged a bullet on the whole body-getting-stolen thing (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 7/22)

AFANASI KOSZCEY b. 1859 “THE LAST”: Problematic, but at least not blatantly terrible? (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 21/22)

AVDOTYA KOSZCEY: Afanasi the Previous wanted immortality, but no one quite knows what Avdotya wanted (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 10/22)

CHERNOBOG KOSZCEY: I mean when you’re named Chernobog it’s understandable if you feel your career goals are limited (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 11/22)

MATRONA KOSZCEY a.k.a. MATRONA WOLFLIN a.k.a. MATRONA GINTAROVA: sometimes you just have to walk away, and also there’s a story behind her marriage but I don’t know what it is (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 3/22)

MISC KOSZCEYS: Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 22/22

MORANA KOSZCEY b. 1813: It may have kind of sucked to be her, but it’s really hard to tell how much (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 18/22)

MSTISLAV KOSZCEY: Should probably get more credit than he does for being a normal person (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 19/22)

RUSALKA KOSZCEY: nothing funny to say here sadly (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 8/22)

VASILISSA KOSZCEY: The one everyone likes (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 9/22)

BEATRIX LESLIE b. 1860: Or Underwood, really, but she kept using Leslie despite her estrangement from her father, so…

ANCAMNA LLYRION b. 1310: Not here to reprimand the entire country of England for you, Vespasien

ASHERAT LLYRION b. 1595: Would almost certainly have been able to veto it if she tried (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, in no particular order, 2/13?)

BRANWEN LLYRION b. 781: Did not ask to deal with Viking-related family feud/diplomatic incident and yet here we are (“The Aquitaine Incident”, 1/?)

BRANWEN LLYRION b. 1105 and MARAJIL AL-DJINNIYYAH b. 1110: Worked out pretty well (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, in no particular order, 8/13?)

CERNUN LLYRION b. 1349 and SABINE BELENES b. 1355: Probably not arranged as such (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, now shifting into approximately chronological order but we’ll see, 11/13?)

CERNUN LLYRION b. 1532 and DEIRDRE TUATHDAN b. 1537: Yes, everyone’s thinking it, but you don’t need to SAY it… (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, 13/many possible others but most of them aren’t as interesting)

CORDELIA LLYRION b. 1522: Because it was there

DYLAN LLYRION b. 1038 and PERIYANACCI ASURYAS b. 1042: Best remembered for Periyanacci’s writing. (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, in no particular order, 9/13?)

FAND AND LIBAN LLYRION b. 969: Major Faeblood families – worryingly powerful mages negotiating delicate alliances or backbiting rumormongers?

LIBAN LLYRION b. 1260 and PIRAMARAYAN ASURYAS b. 1258: Everyone is a little on edge (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, in no particular order, 5/13?)

LLEW LLYRION b. 728 and FINNA ALFVEN: Vikings. Yep. (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, in no particular order, 4/13?)

MANAWYDAN LLYRION b. 1107 and RHIANNON FAERBAEN b. 1106: Not really a dynastic marriage exactly since there was no Faerbaen family prior to this… getting in on the ground floor maybe? (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, in no particular order, 7/13?)

MANNANON LLYRION b. 1251 and CHECHEGENE SHOLMOJIN b. 1264: SPEAKING of nonaggression pact marriages… (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, in no particular order, 10/13?)

NIAMH LLYRION b. 1681: Strong Faebloods+industrialization=:(

NJORD LLYRION b. 644: A Llyrion really should have known better

PONTUS LLYRION b. 1558: It was the timing that was unusual, really. (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, in no particular order, 1/13?)

RAN LLYRION b. 905 and KAMIL AL-DJINNI b. 902: It was a tense couple of centuries in the Mediterranean. (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, in no particular order, 6/13?)

RUSALKA LLYRION b. 1727: as far as anyone can tell she never actually knew anything shady was going on (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 4/22)

THETIS LLYRION b. 750 and ADALBERT BELENES: You may remember Thetis from the Aquitaine Incident (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, in no particular order, 3/13?)

THETIS LLYRION b. 1454 and STEVEN WELHAM: I really don’t have any interesting information about these two unless I want to get into why a Faerbaen descendant is a Welham, which ties into the whole Second Faerbaen Lost Cause Incident… (The Llyrions Marry Everyone, 12/13)

AYOKUNLE OSHUNMARE b. 1815: This reeeeeally wasn’t his problem but he helped out anyway (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 14/22)

YEWANDE OSHUNMARE b. 1787: What?

ISIDORA PETRONOV b. 1914: Whoops just kidding here’s Alexei’s grandmother (Egle Wolflin vs. her siblings’ love-lives, 6/5: tangentially related)

KATERINA PETRONOV b. 1794: She on the other hand definitely appreciated how many metaphorical bullets she narrowly dodged

VLADIMIR PETRONOV b. 1798: Not sure he ever really appreciated how many metaphorical bullets he narrowly avoided

AGAFYA PETROVA: Fully aware what a trainwreck of a family she was marrying into but did it anyway <3 (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 20/22)

ALBRECHT SCHWARZWALD b. 1574: I don’t think anyone would blame him… except probably his brother and nephew

ALBRECHT SCHWARZWALD b. 1781: Being the long-awaited son isn’t really a picnic either (Gebhard Schwarzwald’s Dysfunctional Family, 5/8)

ALBRECHT SCHWARZWALD b. 1982: It would have been a hard choice except it was the only thing he could live with

BERGELMIR SCHWARZWALD b. 1747: The GOOD Sieghard continues to earn his reputation as the good one

CÄCILIA SCHWARZWALD b. 1781: Someone in this family has to be responsible and not spite-driven (Gebhard Schwarzwald’s Dysfunctional Family, 7/8)

CLAUS SCHWARZWALD b. 1908: I feel bad for him but he really shouldn’t have done that

GEBHARD SCHWARZWALD b. 1736: But he just wanted a soooooooon (with bonus fully-human wives #1 and #2) (Gebhard Schwarzwald’s Dysfunctional Family, 1/8)

GERDA SCHWARZWALD b. 1604: Okay but where was this technique 150 years later when Gebhard was obsessing about it?

GISELA SCHWARZWALD b. 1689: It really was a very well-strategized exit

GUNTHER SCHWARZWALD b. 1869: Would he have approved of the stuff his sons got the family into after he died? No. Would he have managed to stop them had be been alive? Also no.

HILTRAUD SCHWARZWALD: Vindictive? That sweet, proper maiden aunt? (Gebhard Schwarzwald’s Dysfunctional Family, 2/8)

INGEBORG SCHWARZWALD b.1775: Not irresponsible or spite-driven but did kind of nope her way out of all the drama (Gebhard Schwarzwald’s Dysfunctional Family, 8/8)

IRMGARD SCHWARZWALD b. 1775: Find her picture under ‘well-behaved women seldom make history’ (Gebhard Schwarzwald’s Dysfunctional Family, 4/8)

KRIEMHILDE SCHWARZWALD b. 1967: Thanks to her nephew it turned out not to be an issue but she had every reason to worry

LEONHARD SCHWARZWALD b. 1810: For some reason this guy always strikes me as more boring than I think he really is?

ODILIA SCHWARZWALD: Leaving the continent was probably not a bad idea (Gebhard Schwarzwald’s Dysfunctional Family, 3/8)

OTTO SCHWARZWALD b. 1545: It’s not ALL his fault, just… a lot of it

SIEGHARD SCHWARZWALD b. 1711: The GOOD Sieghard

SIEGHARD SCHWARZWALD b. 1841: The BAD Sieghard

ULRIKA SCHWARZWALD b. 1784: Baby of the family (Gebhard Schwarzwald’s Dysfunctional Family, 6/8)

WIBEKE SCHWARZWALD b. 1769: Got left out of the ‘Gebhard Schwarzwald’s Dysfunctional Family’ sequence because it required too much Koszcey background, but wasn’t significant enough to make it into the Koszcey sequence

NERISSA SIBLEY b. 1966: It’s like finding out you’re a lost princess, but with extra embarrassing family curse and a really inconvenient iron sensitivity

HONOVI SOYOKAI b. 1832: …Apparently the Western Oshunmares just don’t make very good in-laws? Excellent friends and allies, just really annoying in-laws.

ARWELA SWAIXWE b. 962: All that studying was good for something (Tenth-Century Greenland, 2/4 probably)

NORSAQ SWAIXWE b. 959: Presumably had some sort of alias while pretending to be Spanish or Russian, but I’m not sure what it was (Tenth-Century Greenland, 4/4 probably)

TANEMGHURT TAYYURT b. 1068: When alliance matches go bad

CUSIRIMAY TERRAZES b. 1804: IN-LAWS

MALINTZIN TIACAPAN b. 1744: I should probably decide whether or not she was a first-generation halfblood…

DEIRDRE TUATHDAN b. 1179: Reacted prudently, unlike SOME people.

FIONNGHUALA AND FIONNTAN TUATHDAN b. 1950: Seriously it’s not strange at all

DOROTA VONDRACEK b. 1956: She wasn’t blameless in the marriage falling apart, just less of an asshole during the divorce (Egle Wolflin vs. her siblings’ love lives, 3/5)

ALEXEI VYSHINSKI b. 1961: You could say QUITE A LOT about the eccentricities and interpersonal problems of his parents and grandparents but luckily for them that’s not our point just now (Egle Wolflin vs. Her Siblings’ Love-Lives, 5/5)

SOPHIA WELLS b. 1968: NO, not Desideria.

AUDRA WOLFLIN b. 1963: She wasn’t expecting joy, but she wasn’t expecting this bad a reaction either. (Egle Wolflin vs. her siblings’ love lives, 4/5)

AUGUSTINAS WOLFLIN b. 1957: He could have handled that better (Egle Wolflin Vs. Her Siblings’ Love-Lives, 2/5)

AZUOLAS WOLFLIN b. 1839: not surprising he ended up with a bit of a chip on his shoulder (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 16/22)

DAINA WOLFLIN b. 1809: She WAS happy

EGLE WOLFLIN b. 1954: Well, someone DOES need to be in charge… (Egle Wolflin Vs. Her Siblings’ Love-Lives, 1/5)

GINTARE WOLFLIN: apparently lives in a Gothic novel now, have those even been invented in the 1660s (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 2/22)

ROZE WOLFLIN: In the first draft when everything was over she just sorta died but fortunately for her the author is older and wiser now (Why The Koszceys Are Still Trying To Live Down Their Reputation After An Entire Century Of Nothing To Complain About, 12/22)

#scedasticity's ofic family kudzu

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paranoid-rhythm · 7 years

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Translation: Joker Game Drama CD A Parody Box Full of What-Ifs Part 3

Aaaaaand... this is it, the last track for the latest Joker Game drama CD. I had an attack of the lazies, so this is super late. I deeply apologize for that.

This might be my last (for now) shit post in this fandom. Unless they announce a continuation of this stupid series. lol jk I’ll always be lurking.

Welcome to the D-Agency restaurant. May I take your order?

Warning: Have fun...? Also, as usual, please don’t repost anywhere. Thanks!

Part 1 - 第1話「RPG Parody~ What If Sakuma-san Became A Hero~」 Part 2 - 第2話「Zoo Parody~ What If Sakuma-san Became a Zookeeper~」

第3話「Restaurant Parody~ What If Sakuma-san Is The Part-timers’ Leader~」

Sakuma: One gratin, one tomato pasta and two of the chef’s salad!

Fukumoto: Got it! The cheese hamburger is done!

Odagiri: #11’s dessert is also done!

Sakuma: Okay, I’ll go take it! How much time left for #5’s pizza?

Fukumoto: It needs to be in the oven for 2 more minutes, adding the prep time, it’ll be ready at around 3 minutes!

Sakuma: Okay, got it!

Odagiri: I’ll take care of the salad, so please make the gratin and the pasta.

Fukumoto: Yeah.

Sakuma: We’re really swamped today! Huh, speaking of which, where’s Kaminaga?

Odagiri: If you’re looking for Kaminaga, then he’s at a table at the back…

Sakuma: Huh?

ｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘ

Kaminaga: Eh~ is that so~? Oh, hey, if it’s okay, let’s exchange LINE accounts! When you come again next time, I’ll give you a special discount~!

Sakuma: KAAAAAMIIIIIINAAAAGAAAA!!!!!

ｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘ

Sakuma: It’s finally calmed down…

Fukumoto: Thanks for the hard work! I’ll start preparing the staff meal now.

Sakuma: Thanks as always, Fukumoto.

Odagiri: I’ve also finished washing the dishes.

Sakuma: Thanks! I guess it’ll be calm until the dinner time rush.

Kaminaga: Good work guys~!

Sakuma: Kaminaga! I’ve told you so many times before! There’s a lot of problems in your work ethic!

Kaminaga: Eh? Did I do something?

Sakuma: Don’t ask for the customers’ contact information! Don’t sit on the table! Idle chatter more than need is just the start of trouble! Lunch time in a family restaurant is a battlefield! Work a bit more earnestly!

Kaminaga: Ehh… no one would want to come in such strict restaurant!

Fukumoto: Though it’s true that there’s problems with Kaminaga, it’s also true that we’re really understaffed.

Odagiri: Though we somehow, barely make it work every day, but there’s gotta be a limit if there’s only 2 people in the kitchen and 2 people in the hall.

Sakuma: B-but still---…!!

Kaminaga: Why don’t you ask the manager about it though? He might actually do something about it. As the part timers’ leader, I’m sure you understand that continuing this way would eventually be bad for us.

Sakuma: W-well, you’re right. Being understaffed means our quality of service is lowered. I’ll try to talk to the manager about it. Oh, a customer. I’ll go then.

ｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘｘ

Sakuma: Have you decided on your order?

Hatano: The fried prawn meal set and the drink bar!

Sakuma: Fried prawn meal set and drink bar, okay.

Miyoshi: The meat from this “special demi glaze hamburger”, where is it from?

Sakuma: Uh… I--… I’ll ask the chef about it!

Miyoshi: Also, if you’re just reheating stuff from cold storage, it might have additives and preservatives, so please confirm that as well.

Sakuma: We make everything from scratch, so I think there’ll be none…

Miyoshi: Hmm? Is that so?

Hatano: It’s not like the meat’s gonna be poisonous if it did have some additives. As long as it doesn’t taste weird, then wouldn’t that be fine?

Miyoshi: You ate fried prawns yesterday as well, didn’t you? If you don’t eat a more nutritionally balanced meal, your height would never improve.

Hatano: You bastard--…!!

Sakuma: S-s-sir! P-please calm down!

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Sakuma: Fukumoto, the customer from earlier praised you! He said that the hamburger was delicious!

Fukumoto: Is that so? Thank you very much!

Kaminaga: The narcissistic guy who was so concerned over preservatives?

Sakuma: Hey! Don’t talk of our customers like that!

Kaminaga: Guys like that are all about organic food and natural food, how lame!

Fukumoto: Kaminaga, those two mean the same.

(TN: Kaminaga says “organic” in English and “有機栽培 / yuuki saibai” in Japanese. 有機栽培 = organically grown food.)

Odagiri: Because of Fukumoto’s delicious cooking, our customers have steadily increased, but to the point that we’re so busy, I wonder if this is a good or a bad thing.

Kaminaga: Then why don’t we make the restaurant for reservation-only?

Odagiri: Is there such a thing as a for reservation-only family restaurant?!

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Sakuma: Welcome~! Table for one?

Amari: No, there’s one more…

Sakuma: Ah-! S-sir, I’m sorry but we don’t allow pets inside the restaurant…

Amari: Eh?! Is that so? What do we do now, Frate?

Sakuma: Ahh… you didn’t have to look so disappointed…

Kaminaga: Is anything the matter?

Sakuma: Ah, Kaminaga. This customer here would like a seat with his dog, but we can’t possibly allow them inside the dining area–…

Kaminaga: Then why don’t we set up a table outside?

Sakuma: Huh?

Kaminaga: You know, just like a terrace seat. The weather’s warm today too, so I bet it’ll be perfect outside!

Sakuma: Well, that’s–…

Amari: That sounds great!

Sakuma: Eh?!

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Fukumoto: So, it ended up like that huh?

Odagiri: Only that part looks like an outdoor cafe overseas.

Fukumoto: It’s stylish though.

Kaminaga: Also, bringing the dog along, he’s drawing in the girls.

Odagiri: By “girl” you mean, that little girl?

Sakuma: Well, the customer looks satisfied. It’s all fine then.

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Kaminaga: Thanks for waiting! Your order of beef stockpot set, a large serving of rice, and strawberry pancakes!

Tazaki: Ah, excuse me, I’m the one who ordered the strawberry pancakes.

Kaminaga: I’m sorry! I’ll fix it right away!

Jitsui: It’s alright, it’s a common occurrence, so please don’t mind it.

Kaminaga: *sighs*

Jitsui: Hm? Is something the matter?

Kaminaga: So close… if only you were a girl, I would’ve asked for your contact info!

Jitsui: Ahaha! That’s too bad, isn’t it? Though, I wouldn’t mind if you asked.

Kaminaga: I’m not interested in guys’ contact info though~

Sakuma: KAMINAGAAAAAAAA!!!

Kaminaga: Oh shit, our team leader’s super mad! Well then, please enjoy your meal!

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Sakuma: Good work today! Once you’ve finished with the closing, you guys can go home.

Fukumoto: I want to plan for the desserts that we’re going to serve next month.

Sakuma: That’s fine, but make sure you don’t go home too late, okay? Well then, I’ll go and talk to the manager about hiring new people.

Kaminaga: Good work today~!

Odagiri: Thanks for your hard work.

Kaminaga: New hires huh… what do you think?

Odagiri: We’re a special case after all, and since it’s a chain restaurant, we need to go by the HQ’s guidelines.

Fukumoto: Well, it’s not like we’re hiring a regular, we just need part timers, so I don’t think we still need the HQ’s permission for that, as long as the manager says okay.

Kaminaga: If it’s a cute girl that gets hired, then all the better~!

Odagiri: Earlier, I heard that you were flirting with a cute boy earlier. So you’re up for anything, as long as they’re cute?

Kaminaga: Huh?!

Fukumoto: Sakuma-san was talking about it, about how you don’t care which gender you’re flirting with anymore.

Kaminaga: No! No! I did talk to that guy earlier but not in that sense! It’s not like I asked for his contact info anyway!

Odagiri: There’s only the 2 of you manning the hall, so don’t make too much trouble.

Kaminaga: I get it~ I am working properly~

Odagiri: Oh yeah, weren’t planning for the menu? What are you making?

Fukumoto: I want to make desserts that use melons.

Odagiri: Melons are good.

Kaminaga: I like peaches better!

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*Sakuma knocking*

Yuuki: Enter.

Sakuma: Please excuse me. I’d like to ask for advice regarding the employees--…

Yuuki: About hiring new employees, right?

Sakuma: Ah--… yes!! As of now, the ones assigned in the kitchen are Fukumoto and Odagiri, the ones in the hall are me and Kaminaga, but truthfully speaking, our manpower is not enough, especially during the lunch time rush. I believe that if this continues, we’re going to have complaints.

Yuuki: And so, you want new workers?

Sakuma: Yes. I believe that if we add more manpower, we can serve our customers even more smoothly than how we’re doing currently.

Yuuki: Hm.

Sakuma: *There might be no hope, huh…*

Yuuki: Fine by me.

Sakuma: Eh?!

Yuuki: I’ll be in charge of interviewing new hires.

Sakuma: Is that so? Thank you very much!

Yuuki: You! What do you think is the most important thing that a part-timer must have?

Sakuma: A… a passion for work?

Yuuki: Are you stupid? Such a thing would help nothing. This is what we must look for.

Sakuma: Please excuse me. T-this is--…?! Just what in the world are these conditions!? Do part timers in a restaurant really need these skills?! I’m sure as hell that they don’t!

Yuuki: These requirements must all be met. We don’t need anyone useless, after all.

Sakuma: B-but! I think there’s no one who would clear all this conditions--…!

Yuuki: If there’s no one, then that’s the end of the story. This is good timing too. Make Kaminaga, Fukumoto and Odagiri take this test as well.

Sakuma: T-this is impossible! If they fail, please don’t fire them!

Yuuki: I’ll be the one officiating it. You just stay out of it and do your work as usual.

Sakuma: I--… I understand.

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Sakuma: General knowledge, intelligence, physical prowess, social skills. I thought that there will be no one who would pass with a complete set of all these skills, since the standards are too high. But there were eight men, no eight monsters who were able to pass the bar, one by one.

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Sakuma: So… why did it turn out this way?!

Miyoshi: Wash this plate again!

Hatano: Huuuh?! I’ve already washed it!

Miyoshi: You leave a lot of residue, Hatano.

Hatano: If you’re gonna complain, then wash it yourself!

Tazaki: Ah, ah, don’t fight!

Amari: Ah! This parfait looks good~! Is this a new creation?

Jitsui: Please don’t snitch food, Amari-san!

Amari: I won’t!

Jitsui: There’s already a previous incident, so I can’t trust you.

Tazaki: Is this dish ready to be taken to the customer?

Kaminaga: Ah. I’m the one who took their order, so I’ll take it.

Odagiri: No idle chatting!

Fukumoto: Table 10’s order is up!

Miyoshi: Hm? What’s wrong, Sakuma-san? If you need to do a number 1 or a number 2, then please go ahead.

Sakuma: I don’t need to go to the toilet! *sighs*

Normal employees would’ve been better!

#Joker Game #joker game drama CD #this famires is a mess #also kaminaga seriously??

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