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ashton-taylor-murphy · 27 days

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OCT 26th, 1997 Half of the Whole

Location: Fisher Home

[Partner Death] tw

Summary: Ashton awakes from a dream and accidentally reveals her true appearance to her already weak wife, Margot Fisher.

Ashton writhed in the sheets that were slick with a film of sweat. The only audible sound was her mother's warning, which she had repeatedly ignored, echoing in her mind as she stumbled back into reality. A hand cupped her cheek, but she recoiled. The dilemma was anything but simple. Ashton wanted to lean into the touch and take comfort in being loved and accepted by her wife, but Margot was weak from her last feeding. Just being this close was a risk. "Babe, you're dreaming; wake up." The voice seemed to echo from another world entirely as Ashton fought to open her eyes. Margot rubbed at the lingering sleep in her eyes, "Another nightmare?"

"The fear of losing you to my selfishness causes my dreams to wreck me," Ashton's groggy response was evidence enough that the rest she was getting was all but restful. She wasn't Feeding as much as she needed, and Margot expressed displeasure when she took on another Charge. It was endearing that her wife was so jealous but also dangerous—as if any other charge would even be half as interesting as Margot.

"That's a good line; I will shamelessly quote that in the next book. What a brooding line for the muse," Margot pressed the pen she had picked up to her cheek before writing the words down," I can wreck you in other ways, too." She glanced over the pad sheepishly. Margot had never grasped the seriousness of this exchange. It was all desire and passion. Yes, she loved the woman deeply, but this was selfish. Ashton knew it and did not care to curb the appetite for this relationship. Margot was hers for whatever time was left. Desire brimmed in her wife's eye, pulling forth a deep sigh from Ashton.

"It's the muse's job to inspire, my love." Ashton chuckled as she dropped back onto the mattress, adjusted the pillow, and lay languidly on her side to face her wife, poised above the digital tablet she kept on the bedside table. She was exhausted; she could not keep the glamour in place. Ashton didn't mean to. It was too much too soon.

She froze; Margot had no idea of her limits and how close to the precipice she was standing.

"Ashton Taylor Murphy-Fisher, it is hard to write down all your muse has to offer when you.....when you....Fuck, babe, you are beautiful." Margot mumbled as she slumped back against the headboard with a look that would forever burn into Ahston's memory.

"Wake up! Fuck!" Ashton's hand trembled as she held onto her wife. She had heard that a muse's actual appearance could alone take a life, but she didn't imagine this would be their end.

"Mom, I," Ashton's voice wavered as she spoke into the receiver, "Can you come pick me up?" This was the inevitable phone call. The one Ashton dreaded to make, "I need you."

"Margot is dead, isn't she?" Maeve's voice was one of disgust. Ashton could only whimper through her tears, but her mother's response was kind but stern. "I love you; it's going to be fine eventually."

#[Partner Death] tw #Better Half: self #half of the whole #wickedswriting

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mentacose-archive · 7 years

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Menta! A few weeks ago I got my first wacom tablet! I decided to stop throwing all my art immediately into the garbage and to just keep making art until it doesn't suck so much anymore. You're one of my favorite artists on tumblr. Do you have any tips or advice for brand new baby artists?

whoa okay this is. kinda late i’m super sorry!!! i hope i didn’t make you wait too long aaaaa

ALSO THANK YOU VERY MUCH

AND CONGRATS ON YOUR NEW TABLET !!!!! i’m so happy for you :))

okay back to business. let’s see. this is kind of a hard question but i’ll do my best to answer. if any other artist out there has something to add feel free to do so cause i’m probably not the best teacher but

to begin, i’d say find joy in art.

oookay you’ve probably already accomplished this step XD but let me elaborate. art takes a lot of practice. and by a lot, i mean a lot. like, draw until your fingers fall off, then draw some more. so, try and find fun in even the most mundane pencil exercises. for instance– fall in love with the way you draw lines. get lost in the value and shading. put music on in the background that inspires you. draw things that are so fun that you could easily spend a few hours on the picture and not even notice the evening shadows lengthening and the temperature dropping. because art takes so much dedication and discipline, i think it’s easier to continue with it when you’re enjoying the absolute heck out of it.

of course, there are gonna be areas that you kinda have to train yourself to tackle, even when you don’t want to. take hands, for example. before i understood how to draw them, they were a bane. now, though, i’m a tad more comfortable with them– and i find them to actually be kind of fun. step outside your comfort zone. it’s gonna be super uncomfy at first, but over time, it’ll get easier i promise. and when you’ve gotten to a point where you’re comfortable with it, find something else you’re iffy on and delve headfirst into it. i think that’s the quickest way to improve.

i think now’s a good time to mention references. look at references. etch them into your mind. eat, breathe, and digest them. references will help you a lot. you’ve probably heard this from every artist out there that ever lived, but draw from real life. it may be dull or uninteresting at first, but it will absolutely help expand your skills. i like to refer to this as eating your artist veggies XD not super fun at first, but once you’ve grown huge artist muscles, you’re gonna appreciate that you did it.ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ

i also like to think that in all stages of your art journey, learning from other artists is a good thing. find art styles that capture your heart and take inspiration from those. during my very first years as an artist, the way disney drew soft, round faces for the disney princesses was my main artistic inspiration. afterwards, in my anime phase, i discovered speedpaints done by fantastic artists on youtube and found that my artistic motivation practically tripled in size. because of those artists, i literally shook with excitement as i busted out my colored pencils– and eventually my digital tablet!! so yeah, feel free to learn from those artists. just be aware of the line between “learning from” and “copying”. many artists are very sensitive about this so yeah be careful. ask them before you post a redraw of their piece that you did, and whatnot.

on a small note, making full use of tutorials. they’re gonna be very useful to you. and, as i mentioned before, speedpaints. speedpaints allow you to see exactly what an artist does to achieve their final results– and you might pick up a thing or two along the way!!

it’s also very important to remember to be patient with yourself. art is not a race, and it’s not a competition– but it’s kind of easy to fall into that mindset. there are gonna be people who are going to be more skilled than you, so it’s in your best interest not to compare yourself to them. in my experience, i find that this stunts art and motivation very easily. i’ve fallen into this mindset years ago, and even now i look at artwork done by my peers and feel horrible about the stuff that i’ve drawn. sadly, it’s the biggest thing holding me back right now. comparing yourself to others is not fun, and, i think, only slows down your artistic journey. so, do your best do avoid it.

and finally, this is just something i noticed as i grew as an artist and i have no idea how many artists this actually applies to but. try to understand the things you’re drawing, i guess? haha idk how to explain it but i’ll try my best. for instance, when i first started out drawing faces, in my mindset i was sketching lines that would eventually become a face. as i drew more faces, though, i developed a better understanding of their structure, of how they worked. i understood things like how eye sockets cast a lot of shadow over eyes, and that the length of the philtrum (that’s the area between the nose and the upper lips if you were wondering!!!) determines where the mouth goes. i understood that a stretched-out hand is a little smaller than a face, and that shoulders begin where clavicles end.

this understanding of how objects work applies to many things. water is gloopy– when drawing droplets, it’s best to draw gloops. clouds are puffy, but they have shape– so the fundamentals of shading applies to them. tree tops and foliage are jagged, but those jags are leaves, so i gotta draw them in the most leafy way that i can.

i’m sure i’m going off on a tangent laughs. what i’m trying to get at, though, is that in my opinion artists have this understanding of how the world works around them. buckle in your seat belt cause im gonna go off on a long list of examples once again (≧ω≦)

to me, artists know the visual difference between copper and silver cause they have to apply those differences to their drawings. they know how muscles work, and what hands are shaped like, and where facial features are placed because the more they understand it, the more their artistic skills benefit. those who draw a lot of machinery need to know the different parts of a car cause the more they know, the better their drawings will be. just like how an artist who draws people would find it very useful to know the human body’s muscle structure by heart. just… yeah. try and understand the things you’re drawing. i think it would help a lot.

i think that’s everything i’ve got to say. i hope you were able to find something useful from this large jumble of random tips.

art is hard, so attack it with everything you’ve got. cause with every drawing, you can only get better and better. if you ever have any doubts, or mental hurdles, or art blocks, remember this–

i believe in you. like, a lot. here, have 5 gallons of good wishes!! you got this, so now… go. be great

(╹◡╹)凸

#pikasuz #long post #haha i rambled XD #but!!!!! i hope this was helpful to you in some way #good luck friend #you absolutely can do this <33

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puckish-saint · 7 years

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Hello love! Hope your day is going well. I have a request! If you're interested. How do Genii and/or McCree react when they admit their romantic feelings to their best friend, only for their friend to tell them that they see their relationship as strictly platonic.

can I please have some mccree and reader or genji and reader angst? injury or kidnapping or something, as long as it is ANGSTY

McCreeHe whistles a tune while he waits forthe coffeemaker to finish, stroking his freshly shaved face. He didleave some beard, he’s not about to make the mistake of cleanshaving again, but it’s neatly trimmed, even waxed to keep everyhair in perfect place. “You’re in high spirits.” Satya saysfrom over her tablet, giving him a once over as if she suspects hemight have been brainwashed. “And did you get a haircut?”

“Dead on.” He makes finger guns ather, not admitting that this has been his first professionally donehaircut in six years and that he still hasn’t gotten used to theway his hair tickles his nape. “New shirt, too.”

“I noticed. Looks good, man.” It’sLúcio this time who has to comment, but he’s far from the last.Everyone, as they slowly trickle in for some fresh buns or at least amug of coffee, notices his effort to clean up. Jack half-seriouslytries to remember the last time Jesse bought new clothes and wondersaloud if he missed the memo for another UN meeting.

“I bought clothes in the lastseventeen years.” Jesse says a bit defensively, but not even theteam’s fond teasing can ruin his mood. He’s finally made up hismind to tell you about his feelings and he’s got it all plannedout. There’s a bunch of red roses waiting to be picked up at theflorist at the corner and he’s practiced his speech for days. Latertoday, when both your duties shifts have ended, you’ll be hangingout as you always do and he’s going to confess his love.

Only that nothing goes according toplan. An emergency with the base-wide AC forces him to polish the oldhandyman skills and get his hands, hair and new clothes dirty. By theend of a shift that lasted hours longer than it should have he’scovered head to do in grime and dirt. The shirt he bought was hisonly new one and so he has to resort to wearing, after a quickshower, one of his old ones, washed out and patched up almost asoften as he himself has been. No matter what he does with his beardit simply won’t lie as nicely as it has that morning and eventuallyhe gives up, brushes the wax out and settles for a look that’sstill somewhat better than usual. He hopes.

He hasn’t stepped out of the doorwhen you send him a text, telling him that since your usual routinegot delayed you took to spending the afternoon with Hana and Genjiand he should join the three of you in the recreation room.

The roses therefore stay in the vase,he’s not going to confess in front of everyone, he wanted it to besomething special and now fears it won’t be anything at all.Somehow he manages to keep face throughout the rest of the day,laughing along to Genji’s jokes, losing to Hana in a game of chess,embarrassing himself in front of you, and pretending he doesn’thave the confession of a lifetime lying on his tongue.

At some point you excuse yourself toget drinks for everyone, including Fareeha and Zenyatta who justjoined, and he sees his chance by offering to help. It won’t be onthe rooftop watching the sunset as he planned, nor will his now lessthan dashing looks inspire you to swoon in his arms and the roseswill have to wait until after, but he still has his speech. He stillhas his heart ready to wear on his sleeve.

“You got a minute?” he asks themoment the kitchen door falls shut behind him.

“Sure. What’s on your mind?”

Jesse swallows, takes a deep breath tosteady his pulse thrumming rapidly under his skin and starts.

“Wanted to tell you somethin’that’s been on my mind lately. You’re ma best friend, hell I cancount the number of people who cared for me the way you do on onehand. You’ve become real special t’ me, darlin’, and I … I …”He breaks off as your face falls. You’re not wearing theexpression of someone shocked but overjoyed to hear their secretcrush is reciprocating their feelings. Your face is that of someonewho just had the L-bomb dropped on them out of nowhere and doesn’tknow how to say ‘no’ in the least hurtful way possible.

While Jesse fidgets with his shirt, hechastises himself for never even thinking about this outcome. Healways imagined you falling into his arms, all too happy to progressyour friendship to another level.

“Jesse, I … I’m sorry.” you sayand you are, he can see that much, you really are sorry for having tosay it. Not that it helps his broken heart anything. He tries hishand at a reassuring grin but barely manages a grimace of a smile.

“Nah, it’s okay. Don’t need tosay anything, I got it.”

“You’re a wonderful person, youare, but-”“Nothin’ t’ be done, I know.” Oh God, he’sgoing to cry. He’s going to cry right in front of you unless hegets out of here fast. “Don’t beat yourself up over it. I’llget over it.”

And to show how well he’s alreadygetting over it, nevermind he’s just trying to flee withoutarousing suspicion, he picks up the tray of drinks and walks back tothe others. They immediately see something is wrong.

“Jesse …?” Fareeha says, brushinglightly against his arm.

“‘S nothing.” he lies and then,as an afterthought, pulls out a piece of paper out of his jeanspockets and lays it on the table. “Won’t be needin’ thatanymore. Figure one of you might have better use for it.”Hewants to leave right away but Hana’s gasp forces him to stop.

“That’s a reservation for thefanciest restaurant in this country. The tables are booked out half ayear in advance. How the hell did you get this?”He shrugs,keeps his back turned so no one can see him fighting with the tears.

“Doesn’t matter. Should probablyget some shut eye, though. Was thinking about hitting the road againsoon. G’night, yeah?”

Not even Fareeha’s concerned ‘Jesse,wait’ can hold him back. He all but runs to his quarters, sinksagainst the wall the moment he’s locked the door. He feelspathetic, weak, like the biggest idiot in existence. Most of all hefeels like running away.

No one, and nothing is there to stophim, either. He’s gone before dawn breaks, taking the earliesthypertrain out of Gibraltar.

He runs as far as he can and when he’sthere he’ll keep running just the same. Anything to avoid having tolook at you every single day and know you’ll never love him.

Genji

It starts with him, barely hanging onto life by mechanical threads he already despises, and you, confinedto the sick bay with a broken leg.

You try to get his attention, but don’tknow his name yet and resort to increasingly creative nicknames.Genji ignores them all. He’s focused solely on the thought ofrevenge. Or he tries to be focused, failing as you keep trying to gethis attention.

“What?” he finally snaps. Yourecoil from the force of his words but catch yourself quickly andgrin.

“You wanna trade my jelly for yourfruit cup?” you ask and at this point he assumes you just don’tlike the chemically tasting jelly that’s part of your hospitallunch. Just to spite you he says no, hoping to gain any kind ofsatisfaction from this. He doesn’t.

But you stick around.

Even after your leg has healed youalways seem to hang around the clinic when he’s there to receivefurther enhancements. More than once he wakes from surgery to findyou slumped in a chair nearby, catching up on sleep everyone elsetells him you haven’t been getting a lot.

Eventually your presence becomesbearable. Even later it becomes comforting.

Now when he has to report to Dr Zieglerfor another treatment - his mostly organic lungs are rejecting themechanical transplants and have to be replaced - he expects you to bethere and is not disappointed.

You lie together in the hospital bed,watching a movie on the laptop resting on your legs. It’s inEnglish and you’ve turned on the subtitles without a word, knowinghe still sometimes has trouble understanding every word. Resting hishead on your chest he doubts you do this with all your friends. True,he’s used to being tactile, downright cuddly with the friends heused to have before, but he’s no longer human. His artificial skinfeels wrong, too cold, with too little give. No one would want tocuddle with him just out of platonic affection. Or that’s how hetries to reason with himself. There is something deeper between you,there has to be. Over the last months he’s grown closer to you thanhe has with anyone else in his life. You, more than all thescientists in this hellish place, have saved his life by making himwant to live.

A lull in the movie’s plot urges himinto action. He turns a little, uncomfortable with the unnaturalstretch of his fake muscles, and pulls himself up enough to press hislips to yours.

He knows right away he’smisinterpreted all the signs. He knows and he still doesn’t stop,presses forward, hands curling into the collar of your top, pleadingwith you to just let him have this for one more moment.

You push him away, gentle but firm,pity crossing your face. He can’t bear looking at it.

“Genji … look, I-”“Yeah no,I get it.” he says and pushes himself off, turns his back to you.“Lead me on and have your laugh but when it comes to deliveryou’re-”“It’s not like that-”“The fuck it is.”He’s being unfair but can’t stop himself. Not with the hurtburning in his chest.

“Genji.”“Get out. Just getout.”You stay, try to reason. When you reach out to hug him hesnaps. Whips around and punches you in the chest, throws you off thebed. Only the wires and tubes attached to him prevent him fromfollowing.

“Get out!” he screams, throws thefirst thing he can reach which just happens to be the laptop. Youcatch it, scramble to your feet, throw him one last look and leave.

Dr Ziegler passes you by on your wayout, wants to check with her patient. Genji makes her go away, too.

In the end he’s alone to regret hisoutburst. To wish you’d come back, tell him it was all amisunderstanding. That you do love him, that he hasn’t ruinedeverything.

You don’t come back and Genji doesthe one human thing he has left, the one thing no omnic can mimic. He buries his head in his pillow and cries.

#overwatch imagines #genji #mccree #reader insert #this was harder to write than all those character death fics #Anonymous

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