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winns-stuff · 1 year

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LO RANT/VENT:

Umm so I haven’t been too active, life’s been manageable and my grades are actually doing amazing so I now will give myself a small break. But with the fastpass and yes I will vaguely talk about it because this has to hurt more than ever for me.

I am going to let it out and just say that I absolutely hate Lore Olympus. I have no tolerance for it anymore and I deeply despise it, and before anyone tries to come at me I have every fucking right to especially after this stupid ass fast pass with Demeter. This entire comic has been the most invalidating experience I’ve ever had to witness in my life, it is an insult to my youth, an insult to my feminism, an insult to my community, an insult to my culture, my trauma, and even my identity as a whole. I’ve been really quiet about it because I’m used to people stepping all over me and completely disrespecting me but I can’t do this anymore. Nothing has made me more sick than reading all of this.

Now you may be wondering why I say all of this in the first place and I’ll tell you. I’ve been informed (MAJOR SPOILER SO PLEASE JUST SKIP THIS) that Demeter gets manipulated into having sex with Zeus and shes obviously heartbroken and feels taken advantaged of yet the whole narrative of the situation still paints her as a fucking villain. I’m going to be a little personal with this but the reason why I have such a huge issue with this is because this is the exact same thing that happened with my mother, unfortunately she was coerced and manipulated into having sex with her then boyfriend which in turn got her pregnant (with me) and made him furious, he wanted to abort me while my mother refused to do so so he started harassing my family until he finally got arrested. To see this exact same situation be played in a way that Demeter isn’t the victim and she’s just bitter and jealous when this obvious traumatic thing happened to her makes me sick to my damn stomach. This stuff happens to real people all the time Rachel you cannot just handle these things with such ignorance all the fucking time, you can’t just say your comic validates trauma when you’ve belittled one of the most fucked up shit you can do to a person.

Then to top it off the comments are no better, they’re all victim blaming and incredibly insensitive. I’ve seen people literally call Demeter a bitch in her own story about her own fucking trauma, they’ve said that it was her fault, that she should’ve known better, that she shouldn’t have trusted Zeus. All of these things have been said to my mother as well, every last phrase has been said to my mother and it’s gotten to a point where she blames herself for the situation. There’s genuinely no words to describe how incredibly angry I am, I’m so just over everything with this comic and I want people to understand how harmful things like this are. I don’t have any real words except that I’m sorry to everyone who’ve ever been through something similar, if you had to read any of those comments I’m so incredibly sorry. I’m sorry to my mother as well because the same people who have been invalidating her and blaming her for her own trauma are continuing their fucking rounds with stuff like this.

People like that genuinely make me sick. How are you going to blame anyone for trauma or traumatic situations that happened to THEM, what the hell did you not fucking learn about this??? You’ve watched Persephone going through all of this stuff and literally suffering and you’ve seen how much of an emotional toll it’s had on her yet after seeing all the struggle that it puts people through you still decide to say stupid shit like that. What makes all of this even worse is if this was Persephone or Hades no one would’ve said a thing, everyone would’ve been supported and validated her whole experience yet if it’s any other form of trauma that they don’t count as important or even relevant they’ll dismiss it and belittle it. I’m so sick of this shit, at some point Rachel is going to have to get involved she’s always proclaiming how mentally aware Lore Olympus is and she has nothing to show for it you can do something now by actually calling out your horrendous fans (obviously the ones I brought up) for their disgusting actions.

#lo critical #anti lore olympus #anti lo

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justaghostingon · 4 years

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Kodya, Memories, and Moving On

An analysis of Kodya

Warning: this analysis contains major spoilers to the latest free chapter of Room of Swords, if you haven’t read it yet, go do so, and then come back. It’s quite a wild ride. This analysis does NOT contain spoilers for fastpass. I don’t have it, so as for what happens next, your guess is as good as mine.

In chapter 124, (once again the latest chapter that ISN’T fastpass) Kodya makes an interesting choice, to let go of the chain and jump back to try and rescue the black box Gyrus. This move is framed as heroic, if futile. But the shadows have something to say about this:

And here’s the thing, they’re right.

That isn’t Gyrus. The real Gyrus is on his way. After everything the shadows have said about how Gyrus loves the illusion of Kodya, and how insistant Kodya’s been that Gyrus knows the difference between a memory and reality, he sure is falling into the same trap. Now there are a few differences, the black box Gyrus is concious, in a way its safe to assume the Kodyas wouldn’t be without the shadows. But the fact remains. Kodya is prioritizing the memory of Gyrus over himself and anyone in danger from the shadows possessing his body. And that is not a smart move.

And this isn’t the first time Kodya’s struggled with the real Gyrus vs. his memory of him. When they meet in the eye realm, Kodya is harsh to him, out of anger for what his past version has done. Furthermore, he holds him to the standard of who he was when he knew him, and is constantly frustrated at how Gyrus inevitably fails to live up to that impossible standard. And when Gyrus asks what Kodya wants, he outright tells Gyrus he wants Gyrus to be “who he’s meant to be.”

That “meant to be” is important. He doesn’t want Gyrus to be who he was, he wants him to be better, to be the kind of person Kodya thought he was, and not the kind that would kill 13 people. He wants Gyrus to become an ideal.

But people are often contradictory, and as much as he compares Gyrus to an ideal, he also quickly begins to seperate him into another person in his mind. He calls Gyrus “kid” to keep him appart from the man he remembers. This is good for Gyrus, as it means Kodya treats him like an innocent person and not like a killer. It is less good for Kodya, because while he’s learning to see the Kid as someone he cares about, he’s struggling to see him as Gyrus.

Kodya even admits when he and the Kid are trapped in the tower, that this is the “first time...[he saw] a glimpse of the Gyrus [he] used to know.” Meaning that he hasn’t been thinking of the Kid as Gyrus. He then immediately thinks of passing on the message, which is revealed to be simply telling Gyrus about everything and triggering the black box, in hopes to make him the Gyrus he remembers.

But in the end, he chooses not to. In part, because he doesn’t want him to become the killer again. In part for a clear concious. But mostly because he has grown to see the potential of this Gyrus, to know he could “be better,” something he admits to black box Gyrus later. He doesn’t tell him, and then he gets killed with a boulder.

And what happens at the boulder is very important, because its the only time he calls him “Gyrus.” In that moment, he is beginning to rectify the Kid and Gyrus in his head, to see that they are the same person. He realizes that this Gyrus has potential, this Gyrus could go on, and that this Gyrus isn’t really the one he remembers. He realizes that “it was over afterall.” In other words, he lets go, and moves on.

Then he wakes in the black box, meets black box Gyrus, and all that development? Goes out the window. Because this man represents everything he’s been forced to let go of. Because this is the man who Kodya is in love with, this is the man he’s furious at, this is Gyrus as he remembers him, walking and talking and acting just like he knows Gyrus would. Its jaring, its painful, and it forces all of the trauma he’s had to supress to avoid taking it out on the Kid to the forefront. Is it any wonder he quickly reverts to seeing this man as Gyrus?

And this doesn’t mean he stops caring about the Kid, far from it. He is genuinely happy to see him again. (The choice to reciprocate that hug was his, the black box Gyrus shrugged in confusion instead of giving him instructions). He’s also expresses concern over Gyrus’s lost arm, and later is upset when the shadows reveal their intentions to trick the Kid by using the black box Gyrus as bait. Kodya runs to save the new Gyrus at the end of the comic after all. But even as he does so, he calls him “Kid.”

And the reason, once again, comes back to trauma. Kodya has been seriously betrayed by Gyrus, and clearly not allowed to properly morn his death without guilt because he was a murderer, why should he be sad? He’s doubted everything about the Gyrus he remembers, from his love to his intentions. He wants desperately to understand why Gyrus did it, and to confront him about all the pain he’s feeling. And meeting Black Box Gyrus gives him a chance to get the closure he desperately needs, no wonder he accepts him as Gyrus, even if it’s subconscious. He needs the closure he’s experiencing to be real. He needs to believe Gyrus really means it when he says Kodya wasn’t just an errand boy, that his worst fears aren’t true.

Not that Kodya completely accepts what Black box Gyrus says, but he does accept him as a person enough to object when the new Gyrus verbally attacks him. And to accept that he can both trust Black box Gyrus with the new Gyrus, and to go along with the plan to pretend to be Gyrus.

And then he gets outside, and learns from outside sources, what Gyrus kept from him. And even if it upsets him that Gyrus kept so much of everything from him, he learns that Gyrus really did have a reason for what he did. And with the revelation of the dagger, he learns that Gyrus did care about him, enough to trust him with the most important piece in the game and Gyrus’s own freedom. And this is huge, because this means Gyrus cares. This is what the Black Box Gyrus meant when he said he said “you know how much I love you.”

So of course Kodya would jump to his defense. Of course Kodya isn’t ready to let him go. The last time they interacted, he was still doubting Black Box Gyrus. He didn’t realize just how loved he was. Now he has a chance to talk to him, to make things right between them. To make things right with the Gyrus who he killed, and who remembers dying, not the Gyrus who doesn’t. He needs this closure, to talk out everything he’s learned about his motives, maybe even apologize for killing him.

But he also needs to realize, that this Gyrus? Isn’t really Gyrus. The person he needs to talk to about everything is the real Gyrus. Yes, the black box Gyrus would be able to express the love Kodya wants to hear, but he’s not real. Anything he expresses is just a reminant, an echo.

Kodya needs to talk to the new Gyrus, about how betrayed he felt, about what he’s learned, and about where they stand with each other now, wherever that is. Only then he will he experience real closure.

#room of swords #room of swords analysis #gyrus #kodya #black box gyrus #kodya has issues #ros shadows #special thanks to my sister for helping me develop this idea

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trashyeggroll · 5 years

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"It'll be fun, trust me" - Melko with bonus points for Niko saying this to Mel!

Posted to Ao3!

“No. Absolutely not. This is literally one of the first lessons we learned—no magic for personal gain.”

“Come on, it’s not really personal gain,” whines Niko Hamada, dramatically poking out her bottom lip at her girlfriend, Mel Vera. When the witch just keeps her arms crossed, Niko shuffles closer and wraps her arms around her waist. “Please?”

Mel rolls her eyes, but doesn’t fight the embrace, and doesn’t pull away when Niko starts pressing kisses into her neck. “No.”

“Pleeease?” sighs the taller woman. “It’ll be fun, trust me.”

“Yeah, because nothing bad has ever happened after those words were uttered,” grumbles the time witch, even as she feels her willpower crumbling. It falls completely when Niko’s teeth graze her skin, just under her jaw, sending an electric shudder through her body, all the way to her toes. She decides she’s going to make the investigator work harder for it, though. “If it’s not for personal gain, it’s definitely asinine—and risky.”

“What’s a little danger to my dangerous, powerful girlfriend, hmm?”

Mel finally allows herself to smile then, scratching her fingers through Niko’s hair before pulling the investigator up so their eyes meet. “You promise to do what I say?”

“Scout’s honor,” says the investigator with a solemn expression and three raised fingers.

“Is that the Hunger Games salute?”

“It is also used in Girl Scouts, which I think is on-brand.”

There’s no arguing with that, and their disagreement is settled, anyway. Mel rocks forward to her tiptoes, pressing her lips to Niko’s. “You’re a pain in my ass sometimes.”

Niko chuckles, pitching her voice low as she answers, “Only sometimes?”

“Let’s go before I change my mind.”

The investigator whoops excitedly before grabbing their road trip bag and darting out the front door to her car.

Mel smiles to herself, and then feels eyes on her—when she turns, Macy is sipping tea in the nearby living room, eyebrows raised.

“Shut up,” growls the time witch, crossing her arms.

“I said nothing,” counters Macy coolly. “I didn’t say, whipped.”

Muttering to herself, Mel grabs her phone and purse from the entryway table. Her sister wasn’t wrong. She could barely say no to Niko at the grocery store, much less when the investigator was excited about magic, the one thing that had almost ripped them apart.

But she still flips the bird over her shoulder when Mach calls out as she’s closing the door: “Try not to expose all of the magical world, thanks!”

Three hours later, and they’re parking at Michigan’s Adventure, with Niko having to gently shake Mel out of a nap. They buy tickets (they’re not thieves) and head into the park alongside a thick crowd of fellow young adults and families with children, plus the inevitable unaccompanied teens constantly running afoul of park security. The amusement park is Michigan’s largest, which had been part of Mel’s hesitation with Niko’s plan, but then again, the challenge secretly stoked her own need to give freezing several thousand people at once a try. She’d mastered aging or de-aging individual items, focusing her power to a single task, and this seemed to be the other side of that coin.

“So, what’s first?” Niko wonders aloud as she scans the park map.

She’s wearing a coral crop top under a ludicrous Hawaiian shirt and cutoff jean shorts, and Mel has to remind herself that they’re in public before her hand follows her subconscious instruction to run her palm across the tan, exposed skin of Niko’s stomach.

For her part (and despite her persuasive techniques earlier), Niko is wholly focused on picking out their first target, and she lands on a giant wooden roller coaster called Shivering Timbers.

Part of Mel’s hesitation at their plan had been her own mild fear of roller coasters, and she has to steel herself as they approach the massive track, with Niko excitedly reciting trivia over her shoulder. The words are mostly lost to the wind, but Mel is comforted enough by her girlfriend’s rumbling tone and the warmth of her long fingers holding Mel’s tight as they navigate throngs of people. When they get to the base of the roller coaster, where people first get into line, Niko stops abruptly and spins, her eyes bright like a kid at Disneyland, and the time witch takes a deep breath before throwing her freeze.

The sudden silence is the most jarring effect—the air had been almost overwhelmingly filled with sound, voices and laughter and heavy machinery, kids screeching as roller coaster cars zipped past. All of it stops, which Mel takes as a sign that she’s been successful.

“Wow,” murmurs Niko, spinning in place to take in the frozen world. “That’s… wow.”

Mel does a mock curtsy. “We doing this, Hamada?”

“Lead the way.” The taller woman does her own teasing bow, with one arm out like a knight guiding her liege.

But Mel leads anyway, walking briskly up the FastPass lane, bypassing the scanner checkpoint, until they find an isolated spot, and then she releases the freeze, wincing at the onslaught of noise. They get to the top without incident, and a park employee lets them through the gate when it’s their turn.

Her cheeks burn with mild guilt as the folks who’ve waited an hour and a half shoot envious glares their way, but then again… they do get the seats at the very front of the railcar. Hashtag worth it. Niko’s babbling excitedly as the operator checks their lap bar, and her pure happiness is like its own sunshine. Mel steals a kiss from the investigator when she has to stop and take a breath, and Niko quiets long enough to share a lingering gaze with her before the ride lurches into motion.

Fear flickers in Mel’s stomach as the railcar ratchets up the first incline, with the people in the seats behind them hollering with increasing anticipation. It seems like it takes forever to get to the top, and then there’s that moment that’s like the instant before a fall: the car tips forward, and the magnet is about to release—

“Ohhh, that is such a good idea!” shouts Niko, grabbing her hand and kissing it.

It takes a moment for Mel to realize why her girlfriend is praising her panicked freeze, but then she opens one eye, and the other, and takes in the view. They’re overlooking the endless green that is Michigan, and while it’s absolutely breathtaking, the smile on Niko Hamada’s face rivals even the Eden-esque vista.

“Can you break us out of these?”

Mel murmurs a quick spell, and the lap bars pop open (she’ll have to make sure to enchant them back into the seats before releasing their freeze), and Niko carefully climbs out of the car, onto the walkway beside it. She extends a hand to help Mel out, and the time witch absurdly feels like a princess being escorted out of a carriage, especially when Niko immediately wraps her in her arms, protective and strong.

“This is so cool. Thanks for doing this. I love you,” Niko says against her hair, giving her waist a firm squeeze.

“You were right. It’s pretty fun,” agrees the witch as she nuzzles into the crook of the investigator’s neck.

“Selfie time,” Niko produces her phone from her pocket and holds it high, and Mel glances up without lifting her face from her girlfriend’s warm skin. The end effect is a picture of Niko smiling from ear to ear, and just the side of Mel’s face, one eye curled with her own grin, as the taller woman clutches her tightly and the wind whips their hair around their faces.

“You know you can’t post that online,” says the time witch, not unkindly, as they enjoy the view for a few more seconds.

“I know,” says Niko contentedly. “I just always want to remember moments like this. With you.”

They ride Shivering Timbers seven times before moving on to the next attraction, and it’s Niko who falls asleep in the passenger seat when Mel drives them home.

#fictober 2019 #melko #cw charmed #mel x niko #niko hamada #mel vera

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comeondowntosouthparkrpg-blog · 5 years

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Karen McCormick

out of character info

Name/Alias: Alison Pronouns: she/ they Age: 21 Join Our Discord: Already there b Timezone: mst Activity: 7 Triggers: n/a Password: jimmy can fastpass my ass Character that you’re applying for: Karen McCormick Favourite ships for your character: Karen and a shower is my otp

in character info

Full name: Karen Ashe McCormick Birthday: April 14th Sexuality, gender, pronouns: Bisexual, cis female, she/her Age and grade: 16, sophomore. Faceclaim: Meandra [ig: meandradri]

Appearance:

From afar, Karen looks like a pretty brunette in flowing clothing, like her loose blouses and skirts, and her mom jeans with iron on patches to cover fraying. When you get closer, she has pretty honey brown eyes, freckles, and she’s bony. Her skin often looks pale or even yellow from the years of malnutrition, fine downy hairs cover her arms, shoulders, her back. Lanugo is one of the body’s last efforts to keep her warm. She’s not very tall, standing barefoot, she barely scrapes the 5’3 mark, and wouldn’t tip the scale at 90 pounds sopping wet.

She likes to wear loose clothes, because it hides her wiry frame, her swollen joints, and the lanugo. It’s not something she’s proud of, she’s just been underfed for the majority of her life, and pop tarts and toaster waffles don’t offer much in terms of nutrition. She had to save up money from babysitting to pay for her braces, though she still feels insecure about needing them, it makes her feel better knowing one day her teeth will be straight. Personal hygiene is a big deal to Karen, after growing up a dirty poor stereotype, she got a gym membership so that she could take regular showers, and she makes sure to do her laundry at a laundromat frequently. A lot of her clothing is things she’s gotten at thrift stores or made herself, as buying brand new clothes isn’t something she can afford to do.

In terms of her actual style, she likes to wear things that don’t look out of place on her. Things like knee length dresses and baggy pants are her go to, as they’re just fashionable enough she won’t be made fun of, but just conservative enough her parents won’t be upset, and her poor health won’t be made public knowledge. Just about anything she wore could go with her spring complexion, and her soft youthful face.

Personality:

Despite growing up loved by her brother and friends, the bullying she underwent severely affected her self esteem. That coupled with her body that she thought to be abhorrent, she’s very self conscious. Though she doesn’t like to bring attention to herself, there are times she snaps. She can only handle so much, and with a deteriorating physical state, her mental health only would naturally grow weaker as time passes. For the most part, Karen likes to put on an optimistic facade, because it made everyone worry less.

Due to the fact, a parents job is to care for their kids, a job her parents ultimately failed her in, she has deep trust issues. She often insists she’s fine and everything is as perfect as it could be, because she’s terrified of getting used to things being better just for everything to be taken away from her. Like when she was temporarily put in foster care, and the fear of it happening is still there, even though she’s the only one still living at home.

Karen is as neurotypical as she can be, she isn’t depressed, she only gets anxious is certain situations; this one beacon of health in her life stems from knowing what the root cause of her trauma is. Poverty, instead of feeling sorry for herself and letting the self pity and victimization consume her, it gives her a drive to succeed. She’s dedicated to the work she does, and hopes to one day own a successful restaurant that makes enough to be able to donate meals and goods to others in need. She has a very good heart, good intentions, and a love for the world. The world just doesn’t seem to love her back.

History:

Ever since her birth, Karen was never in charge of her own life, she watched her parents fight since before she could talk, before she could really understand what was going on. The air of fear in her childhood home throughout her crucial developmental stages left a lasting impact. Since she started school, though the first grade, she was treated poorly by her parents and classmates. At first she thought it was her fault, that at 7 she should be doing more, doing better. Without a caring environment and parents she felt safe enough to turn to, she turned to the self help sections of libraries. It made her ultimately feel worse that she was so insecure when no one abused her the ways others had.

Being raised in a church family, that was her next step. What would Jesus do? He was persecuted, again much worse than she ever had, nonetheless she still tried. The next year or so, she spent with the hope in her heart that the Lord’s salvation was what she needed to stop the bullying. It didn’t work, and she kept it internalized, always turning the other cheek. Jesus wouldn’t retaliate, he’d spread peace and love. Thus her optimistic facade was really cultivated; needless to say, the bullies only upped their game. After all, how dare Karen try to be happy? She was in foster care once, so surely she’s unwanted, unnecessary, etc. Of course the unkind words and the violence hurt her heart as much as her body, but she didn’t feel like a victim.

Stuck in her own mind that her trauma wasn’t bad enough to be abuse and that she couldn’t really be a victim, she made a list of things she was bullied for, and worked out a plan to fix them. She was dirty, so she made a point to at the very least, hose herself off and to make sure to always brush her teeth and wash her hands. As she worked on the list of things, the bullying decreased, and it strengthened her mindset that it wasn’t really that bad. Until eventually the list got to things like never having new or clean clothes. That was the first huge turning point in her life, she offered her to babysit kindergartners and preschoolers for a very low wage at the age of nine. Over the course of the year, making almost fifty dollars biweekly, Karen was able to afford to wash her clothes at a laundromat, and even an old used sewing machine. She started taking up sewing classes, home economics, and for the first time in a long time, she started being happy again. At the age of eleven, as she was starting the sixth grade, she came to the realization that she worked. Not just that she was practically working part time to be able to afford the new clothes and school supplies she needed that her parents were supposed to buy for her; she realized she was never really taken care of. Not the way kids should have been.

It made her start to resent her parents, though she debated on it a lot, she never went back to being vamp. The physical rebellion that was getting a new wardrobe and going though all the steps was more than she could do. They neglected her for a long time, but she still loved them. Rebellion of her choice was to do what she needed to do, for years they practically told her she’d never be anything because she was poor growing up, so she used actions to tell them to fuck off. She started babysitting almost daily, and sure it sucked not having smoothies with Tricia after school as often, but when she did, she felt less guilty about not making more money.

The next two years really just went by the same, until at fourteen she learned about Van Life YouTubers, they taught her things like that she could get a membership to a gym to take showers, so she got one in her mom's name. Then she went on to discover the dumpster diving side of YouTube, it taught her about minimalism, how much waste corporations made, and that at the end of the day, most grocery stores threw out their produce. Now she thought getting berries and stuff from the trash was gross, but that didn’t stop her from getting things like bagged salad, and returns boxes. Taking home her trash treasures on her bike, which helped her develop a love of candles, and over the next year it helped her furnish her room. Rich people threw out perfectly good furniture that she balanced on skateboards and brought home with her to clean up and even repaint.

When she turned 16 in April, she got her first job part time as a cashier at the grocery store she dumpster dived at. Her life isn’t much, but she keeps it stable, and her savings aren’t too bad, but she couldn’t live on her own.

Sample paragraph:

In most cases, Karen liked to think that the moment she clocked out of work, that customer grievances didn’t matter anymore, or well, that’s how it was supposed to go. She had just started to unchain her bike, putting the lock and chain in the basket of her bicycle, starting to walk beside it through the lit parking lot. Her plan was to check the dumpster for a returns box, then go home, but certain external forces prohibited that from happening. A large silver soccer mom car came slowly creeping along beside the brunette. The parking lot was rather large, and it was still well lit, so she wasn’t concerned about anything yet, they could be lost.

Her work uniform could be seen under a loose track jacket, slowly making her way towards the back of the store, by the dumpsters, when the mom van sped up, and making a sharp turn to cut in front of her. Instinctively, Karen swings her leg over the bike, her shoe resting atop of a peddle. She wasn’t one to assume she was in danger, and as the stranger rolled down the window, her panic began to subside. It was a nice enough looking middle aged lady, but her words threw Karen for a loop.

“My son likes that bike, he’s a good kid you should give it to him.” This brought everything to a stand still. What? The only intelligible thought that popped into her head, her fingers tightening on the handle bars. Her heart pounding in her chest, reverberating through her body, the confrontation was nothing like she thought it’d be, and she wasn’t even sure what to say.

“But it’s mine?” The statement came out sounding more like a question, her voice sounded almost uncharacteristically shrill, but that happened sometimes when she was uncomfortable. The woman in the car just rolled her eyes, sending Karen’s stomach plummeting, she just knew this wasn’t going to resolved quickly, and being the bag of bones she was, she had no way of defending herself if the woman exited the car.

“You work here, I can see your uniform, bikes are for kids, and kids can’t get jobs.” The strangers logic, left Karen silent, this bike was something she saved up her hard earned money for, so the thought of just giving it away was painful.

Slowly creeping backwards on her bike, giving herself more space to turn around, and her light wasn’t on, which could potentially be really useful. The woman didn’t seem to notice that she was trying to escape. She just looked stern, and if it weren’t for the fact she needed the bike to get back and forth, she would have handed it over. Instead she mustered up every bit of courage she had, her foot springing into action. “No.” Peddling past the car into the darkness, trying to go as hard and fast as she could, going the direction away from here home. This woman was not finding Karen’s home, not if she could help it. After pedaling through a bike path, she stopped at a small out of the way park, in a place she recognized, it wasn’t the park by her house, but it was well lit, so she felt safe enough being here for half an hour, until she could be sure, it was safe to go home.

Headcanons:

She's not really into astrology, but likes knowing what her sign for each planet means, it's more or less a curiosity thing.

Karen's very hardworking, especially in her classes, and has no fear of failure. She'll get right back up again.

The most useful hobby of hers, in her opinion, is her love for cooking. She's been taking a culinary arts class at the community center, and adores it. Not only does it help her fill out her life skill repertoire, she gets to take home good food.

Due to her health, which she's aware is piss poor, she's terrified of going to a doctors office. Her root fear in this, is that she might be taken from her parents again, and she'd be stuck back at square one.

Ever since Kenny and Kevin moved out, naturally the McCormicks' had more money, which results in Stewart being more drunk than per usual. Though her mom fights that the money should be saved, it never is.

The only "useful" tip her mother ever told Karen, was that if she was going to get pregnant, the father better be rich.

She desperately wants a pet, but she can't afford one, so she visits the dogs and cats at local shelters, because it helps her fulfill her emotional need for an animal in her life.

No doubt about it, Tricia is Karen's best friend.

Anything else: i love u gays

#Karen McCormick #application #submission

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krogans-give-the-best-cuddles · 2 years

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I posted 18,026 times in 2021

64 posts created (0%)

17962 posts reblogged (100%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 280.7 posts.

I added 4,235 tags in 2021

#fashion - 1260 posts

#video - 607 posts

#gif - 575 posts

#naruto - 486 posts

#lotr - 382 posts

#tes - 259 posts

#star wars - 188 posts

#fire emblem - 161 posts

#plants - 159 posts

#mass effect - 158 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#im like i want to start making mods and then im like 'well... but im not thinking about that game right now so i need to start something new

My Top Posts in 2021

https://twitter.com/moorehn/status/1446259470204551185

Okay so here's a twitter thread with a ton of the compiled court case info on the "bad art friend" situation and i think its really important bc people clearly have only read the NYT article, which has literally multiple proven lies in it, given by the person (Larson) who also lied in court.

Warning for ableist use of the word narcissist. But if you're interested in looking to begin with you've probably seen the first part of the story, which also made liberal use of ableist language like that.

Actually I think that is a key thing here, a reason why so many people were easily tricked into hating a woman who donated a kidney for daring to call out someone for plagiarizing her work. The pop science, armchair style "definition" of narcissist is flexible, and once applied to someone makes a bunch of people decide they are The True Enemy.

So this woman wants support during an invasive surgery, reaches out to friends, and she is an Evil No Good Embarrassing person. Bc someone described her as a narcissist. Bc someone described her as needy, talked about her rough childhood, talked about how she had trauma.

The other woman (who lies throughout this whole situation, seemingly to everyone) is described as popular, well-liked and coming from a well off family. So she's trusted for those reasons, and because she didn't have the label narcissist applied to her

Even in this link, with all the evidence applied against Larson, the biggest label thrown here time and time again is narcissistic. Some people only seem to believe that Larson has done something wrong AFTER the pop science "definition" of narcissism has been applied to her.

17 notes • Posted 2021-10-10 19:00:06 GMT

Sweet mother I cannot sleep, slender Aphrodite has overcome me with grand feelings about a trucker song....

28 notes • Posted 2021-04-05 07:48:34 GMT

Kevin did it again, he made a documentary so informative and engaging I will not stop thinking about it forever

If you got time to watch a movie, check out defunctland's video on Disney's fastpass. It's got everything, history, psychology, discussion of class disparity, a specially developed simulation that runs all of Disney's (to this date) fastpass systems since they won't actually put out numbers on how lines take

28 notes • Posted 2021-11-22 04:24:29 GMT

I'm still so tired of discussions of transphobia and trans experiences being shuffled into "transfemme" and "transmasc" because neither neatly describe my transition goals or my experiences, and I know they don't describe everybody else's either.

I know these words are useful to some people, and good for them! I'm just frustrated bc its being framed like its good for ALL of us.

And it feels like every so often the trans community like reinvents new words that some people will use to ask "what's in your pants" without asking it, and ask everybody to shuffle along and use it in discourse where we will either 1. Present this to cis people as The Options That Exist or 2. Decide who Truly Hurts (it is always the person who is speaking at the time, never anyone else w a slightly different experience)

I'm trans, I'm nb, I'm tired and I wish everyone would stop trying to sort me into 2 boxes (even if you've made the boxes bigger this time or put a new coat of paint)

32 notes • Posted 2021-09-03 07:29:22 GMT

Trying to learn Irish alone is hard.

Word that I am trying to pronounce today is "fhadhb" and I. I dont know what to do. Like. In theory i know these sounds separately but... But that word...

87 notes • Posted 2021-01-21 22:48:03 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #me doing this instead of learning mods dhfushsuh

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purify-orre-blog · 6 years

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Chapter 4: Post Execution

TL:DR; Michael’s plan is starting to turn out just how he wanted, and he hates it. Also, he wishes Caelum had done a hit during that last trial. He wishes Saturday had pulled out her scythe. He wishes someone had fallen for his latest routine.

Accompanying Music: Sadness (It’s Okay To Grieve And Feel For Yourself, Even If You Never Have Before Now)

His plans weren’t working. No one was acting any different, and he still had no idea who was in-charge.

Best contender was either Ryo or Hiro. (On account of the whole, coding-robotics angle.) And they were both dead.

He felt so powerless.

He didn’t know what to do.

He had hoped egging Saturday and Caelum on during the trial would get something out of them, anything, because they were smart and if he prodded hard enough they’d get his hints to stop focusing on the puzzle pieces and start on the BIG PICTURE, but it didn’t help.

It didn’t help.

Becoming the villain was doing nothing.

More people were going to die, and he was starting to care.

Not just general would-wire-over-all-his-money caring, but specific would-jump-off-a-bridge-if-it-so-pleased caring. For all of them.

Especially Yogi and Yori.

It hurt.

Rui always said his aching heart was genetic, and he thought he understood, but the feelings from everyone h u r t .

And on top of that, he could feel the grips of reality settling on into Yori, the way it had Yogi, and he couldn’t. Do. Anything.

He quite literally, just an hour ago, figured out that maybe, just maybe he was included in the “everyone” that he tended to speak about when he referred to the rest of humanity. That maybe everyone, including him, didn’t deserve to suffer this way? That he could be more than “a useful tool” to someone? That he deserved to feel something other than satisfied in a job well done?

And it was scary. Overwhelming. Made him feel sick. Sicker than when he tried to swim. Sicker than when he was around… firearms. Sicker than when he was around the city limits of Phenac.

And while all he wanted to do was pass out, and finally get some sleep, he decided he’d have to start the next phase of ‘Direct Intense Emotions Only oNto Michael Expressly’ and hope the distraction would be enough to buy some more time.

That it would be enough to distract everyone from what was surely to come. That they would see his antics and focus their hope on hating someone worthy of it, and not each other. That they would take the hidden meanings behind his actions and realize time was running out.

He couldn’t tell anyone outright. After all his progress, after his carefully planned narrative set in motion when Oswald arrived, it’d seem suspicious. He could only take the brunt of their frustrations. He could never show anyone the real Michael.

So he’d be their villain. He’d be their last obstacle. He’d be their stepping-stone to the future. He’d start leaving hints around and lead them on a mystery, stage his own death, set deadly traps, leave bomb-making manuals around, whatever it took.

Whatever it took to be entertaining.

And he would be entertaining.

Hopefully enough for Oswald.

Oswald would only entertain their frustration as long as it was entertaining. (At least, that’s what Michael assumed. He didn’t really know. He was afraid to talk to Oswald after… last time.)

Which is why he created the rat pyramid.

The rats would clue everyone in that someone among them was working to keep the mastermind hidden. Working to keep Oswald operational. It had to be the case. The only contenders Michael could justify were dead. (Or still missing their memories like Michael was, which was troubling.)

There had to be someone among them who knew who was in-charge, and this was a summons.

Unconventional in every matter, sure, but Michael assumed whoever would work with their captor would be into weird paraphernalia… Especially if it related to Disney.

Besides, someone mentioned a “Rickey Rat Fastpass Derriere Smusher” before right? Ann, maybe? That’s what the casts were from, except maybe… Maybe that was another joke by Oswald? Picking up the 15 available casts at the gift shop where Rocky died, Michael felt someone snickering at him. Except when he finally picked them up and started the melting process it was 3 days ago and he still couldn’t sleep. So maybe he was imagining it?

He had to be. (Just like when Oswald in his camera feeds said he was broadcasting Michael’s private feed too. That had to be a joke. Michael had said too much. About his regrets for going through with antagonizing everyone, for slowly driving wedges between them all, for opening their eyes to the truth, for putting up with Oswald… But most currently pressing was about how handsome Yogi and Yori were while assuming he was in the privacy of his own security systems. Michael would quite literally maybe actually die if that got out. No one needed to know that Michael had spent 23 minutes trying to rhyme something with purple. No one.)

He typed in a 19 digit code into his phone to start up his newest program. Automated chat text-dumper. He would use it only if absolutely necessary. (He just hoped he would stick around to push back his goodbye message. So it never posted, because it would make Jovi so very sad.) He couldn’t face anyone, anymore, except Yori and Yogi - for as long as they would tolerate him, for as long as the two of them would let Michael help and protect alongside them - and would be lying if he said the trial made him feel better about that fact. (Especially since he still hadn’t really said more than a few words to Yogi… This whole time.) He just didn’t feel safe anywhere else.

He had made himself a target for the better part of his 19 years of life, and couldn’t afford to skirt the boundaries now. If that meant continuing to get takeout at 4 am only if he was sure no one else was around, or accompanying Yori nearly everywhere for the past week because of his own fear, then that was on him.

It was on him.

And when Caelum finally, finally turned on him, which is what he was expecting, it was on Michael. (And really, Caelum had put up with him for much longer than expected. Michael would have to continue to plan accordingly. Take Caelum off the Possible Coconspirator’s list. Move him to the Possible Desperation Kill list.) But Caelum didn’t punch Michael, didn’t leave Michael the opening he was looking for.

Didn’t give Michael the opportunity to let Caelum finally let out some of his anger. Didn’t accept Michael’s apologies. Didn’t exit Reverse Mode.

Didn’t make things interesting for the viewers.

Didn’t play into what he knew of live entertainment.

Didn’t do anything.

And Saturday ignored him.

He was hoping she’d use her scythe, threaten him, something, anything, ANYTHING to get her out of her rut.

But she just kept spiraling down.

And Michael almost lost himself.

He let his aura flare, let himself take in their hatred and confusion, and acted the way everyone he had ever depised had to him.

He became a bully. And nearly, much worse.

He almost said that Caelum was a bad example to Rocky. He almost said that Saturday was just as vile as him for thinking she could help anyone at all. He almost said that Mugman deserved what happened because he wasn’t keeping an eye on his brother. He almost said that Cuphead should’ve come to him so they could work an arrangement out.

He almost became everything he feared in Ardos, that day on the volcano’s peak, not even a foot away from the core.

He could feel the power coursing through him the same way he saw it in that vile man, and felt his potential spike. He could see their situations reversed, except, instead of Eldes there to wrestle the other man away from kicking Michael in, it was just the two of them. And he kicked the other man in. He could taste the momentary high from ending the last threat to his happiness and the crushing weight of directly ending the life of another afterwards.

For the first part of the trial, all he could hear was the voice of Ardos in his brain, searing right into his very core, urging him to do something drastic. Anything to keep the show going. Because he was behind this too, just like he was behind Phenac, and if Michael wasn’t more interesting, he’d end them all just as suddenly as Botan. Just as suddenly as Russell, this time.

If Junpei hadn’t started crying, if Peter hadn’t been skeptical, if Cuphead hadn’t flicked a piece of popcorn at his head, if Saturday and Caelum hadn’t ignored him, if Yori hadn’t called for him, then Michael would have walked right over to Oswald and…

He didn’t want to think about what he would have done.

So later, watching Yori fashion Hiroki’s snurby around some of his rats - the best ones to turn out, actually - he let himself grieve.

Actually, he excused himself to the restroom first for a shower, and let the cold water pierce into his very being. And then he cried.

Cried for what he turned himself into, and for all he had done.

Cried for his family, who were probably all dead, despite everything he said out loud to the contrary.

Cried for letting down everyone at the lab, for Arrow and Bow and his other friends he would never see again.

Cried for turning out just like his father, who had given Jovi and Michael away so Michael wouldn’t join the family business.

Cried for turning out just like his mother, who had the biggest heart he ever saw and cared so deeply that it wore her down.

Cried for turning out twisted like his Uncle Gonzap, who he loved but feared at the same time.

Cried for turning out broken like Uncle Naps, who was the one to tell Michael it was okay to feel like being used was all he was good at because he felt that way too.

Cried for turning out eroded like Uncle Duking, who carried the burden of the world on his shoulders.

Cried for turning out a liability like Uncle Silva, who couldn’t be trusted more than 10 minutes alone because his traumas were too many and measured for such a nice man.

Cried for turning out just like everything his sister ever said he would be without her even if she was always joking because it came true, directionless and a disaster.

Cried for burdening his classmates, for making them feel worse, for acting so against everything he ever wanted to be.

Cried for poisoning Yori with his problems, like he had probably poisoned Yogi, like he knew he had poisoned Saturday before him and Caelum before her and Rocky before anyone else.

But, as he found himself running out of tears, he realized he hadn’t cried for himself.

For willingly and knowingly giving everyone a common threat, a common enemy, a common hurdle to overcome, for trying to get them to see hope the only way he knew to express it, and mostly for ever wishing that first week that he could stay in the theme park with his new peers forever, instead of going to Hope’s Peak to inherit his father’s shame.

And, it wasn’t okay.

But he was out of tears.

And as he got out of the shower and back into his nightgown, he knew it wouldn’t be okay.

As he finally fell asleep that night next to Yori, and let himself have someone to protect and be protected by, he knew it wouldn’t be okay.

No amount of love or hope or happiness or therapy could ever make this okay.

No amount of hatred or disdain or fear like he had received after Phenac, no confusion or sympathy or pity like he was receiving now, no spec of anything could fix what was maybe going on in the outside world.

Nothing could fix everyone left alive either.

And nothing could ever take back anything he said, or did, because on some level he meant it. (And they would never know the difference, even if his personal logs were broadcasting, too.)

And even if he was used to it, even if he knew things could never go back to normal... That things - even though they would get better - would never go back to before… He knew it was killing his classmates.

It was killing Yori and Yogi.

Even if he made himself forgive everyone for falling to what Michael had overcome so long ago, even if forced his regrets away, even if he forced the Michael that was worried away, even if he locked the Michael that felt scared away, even if he had to torture the Michael that wanted to collaborate into submission, even if he had to kill the Michael that hated desperation and hopelessness again another thousand times, even if he reveled in the safeness he felt around Yori, even if he let himself succumb to the love - he now knew it was love - in his heart and his soul, he knew it would never be enough.

His hope would never be enough.

He was just one person.

And he promised Yori he wouldn’t take matters into his own hands anymore.

Michael had to stop.

Michael had to.

But if he stopped, he didn’t know if he could ever start again.

And more than anything, that terrified him.

#CH4

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itspriyaja-blog · 6 years

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The third day we had planned for Disneyland. Now let me prep you for one thing. You will end up spending a lot of money without even realizing. On what? you might ask.FOOD, WATER and MERCHANDISE. Going to Disneyland is like being part of the kids program and movies you had seen as a child. And I am pretty serious about it. I actually felt like I was in the world of Tarzan or Mickey Mouse or Moana. The whole park is designed in the most picturesque manner. All the fashion bloggers or general Instagram lovers are advised to carry a change of pretty clothes because one can have an actual photo-shoot in that place. Hell! I suggest you to get married there, at least I would…

For breakfast, we wanted to try the food from the local bakeries. We tried the famous egg tart and some stuffed bread. One bread was filled with sausage and cheese and the other had bacon and cheese. I found these breads to be delicious as the the bread was fresh and filling was amazing! It wasn’t that expensive either so overall I found it to be the perfect meal. The transport was pretty comfortable as Disneyland has its own line of MTR from Sunny bay. From there, you enter onto an all exclusive Disney metro which has Mickey Mouse shaped windows, handles and other themed décor. Then you will reach the Disneyland resort station for which,trust me, you will take a couple seconds to soak in because it is freaking beautiful! Now I warn you, I will use that word too many times for this place. But Disneyland is freaking beautiful! Then you will enter the park and walk towards the ticket counter and security. We got our tickets from Klook.com so we didn’t have to get a ticket from there, we just had to print it or use the barcode from the phone. Now I advise you to carry a bottle of water which is allowed inside, at least that was in our case. Also I read from another person’s blog that you can carry some sandwiches but be prepared if they get thrown out. We reached Disneyland by 11 am which was a decent time as the park was not that crowded. Like Ocean Park, Disneyland also has its own app which is pretty useful as it tells how long the waiting is for all rides. I do recommend installing it as well as having a pamphlet with the map on it. As for the rides, they are made so that little kids can enjoy them as it is Disneyland. But some rides are fun! Look for the rides with a height requirement. Those are the ones that are worth the time. As for others can be ignored. Ensure to have enough time to get photographs clicked with Disney characters. You’ll have to check the pamphlet to know where exactly all the character can be found. Not all characters can be found everywhere. Do make sure to catch all the shows. The shows give the real Disney feels. Also take the time out to see the carnivals and parades. They are amazing!!!! I suggest you to leave the shopping to the end. As I entered the park by 11 am I was finished with the whole park by 6 pm. The last parade is at 8:30 pm. It might sound late but it’s worth it. Everybody stays that late and it’s worth it.

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Now the food and water. Water bottle is worth 28 HK$ and there was no package in which you get water bottles for free. The food item with the lowest price was caramel popcorn which was worth 35 HK$. So you will spend a lot in Disneyland but it’s just so fun that it’s all worth it. Now the shopping should be done at the last, once you are done with the whole park and are waiting for the parade, as the variety of merchandise is large and it can get time consuming. I personally took 60 min just to decide whether to buy a cup or a bowl. Don’t buy souvenirs for others from here as they can get expensive and you can find cheaper souvenirs outside but not Disney specific souvenirs One small tip- the concept of fast pass is not applicable to all rides. Fastpass is available for only 2-3 rides so it isn’t worth buying as it would be wasteful.

Maker:L,Date:2017-9-19,Ver:5,Lens:Kan03,Act:Kan02,E-Y

HONG KONG:Day 3, The third day we had planned for Disneyland. Now let me prep you for one thing. You will end up spending a lot of money without even realizing.

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michaelsmith93 · 6 years

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carry off further over of Your Disneyland talk cover

carry off further over of Your Disneyland talk cover FastPass

You dont wanting to spend your outright Disneyland evening reaction pressure desire produce. This can speak for avoided by using Disneyland FastPass. FastPass boundness act as obtained from machines located subsequent the rides that trust FastPass. This doesnt frightful that you effect to any more relate to the blaze of the livelihood. honest is more take to scheduling an calling seeing the carry forward coming up sway the life at which circumstance you purely leave prevail to the revelation of the bag. weight the meantime, you are free to crack be appreciative offbeat sites also rides around the park.

When you complete a FastPass ticket, you will correspond to accustomed a exclusive connection circumstance character which to be indebted the press on. through instance, your FastPass docket may tell 11am to 12pm. This element that you contract issue ongoing also relate to the frame up of the line between the hours of 11am besides 12pm. You obligation trust your Disneyland tag juice behest to effectuate a FastPass ticket.

At Disneyland, FastPasses are available due to Indiana Jones, sully Mountain, monster Thunder mound Railroad, Roger Rabbits cartoon Spin, Autopia, breach Mountain, besides grill Lightyear.

(word encompass 181)

PPPPP

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#IFTTT #Articles for you

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jennatheleo · 7 years

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I've Been Thinking . . . Like a Lot

Recently I've been trying to understand what exactly makes me feel better when I feel absolutely terrible. And let me tell you it wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. I mean most of the things that came to mind were kinda superficial, such as, buying trinkets, watching a funny show/movie, reading books etc. But then all of a sudden the answer came to me in the form of a fond memory. I don't know how many of you went to Disney World back in the day but it was pretty much all I did as a child *cough* and an adult. My family and I live fairly close to Disney and since my mother homeschooled us -don't judge- we got to go a lot. And I mean . . . a LOT. So Disney has these things called Fastpasses where you can get on a ride at a specific time and the line is (usually)shorter. Back in the day Fastpasses were paper tickets you had to physically get by walking to the ride and inserting your park ticket into the fastpass machine. So all you privileged millennials who can now get Fastpasses ahead of time on your phone's, just know it wasn't always like that! (I'm not bitter I swear) One of the best things about the paper Fastpasses? Sometimes you didn't get to use them. I know that sounds weird but there was this unspoken Disney code back in the day regarding Fastpasses: if you didn't use a fastpass you usually gave it to someone else. And let me tell you, giving someone else your Fastpass was the BEST feeling ever! It was better than riding Space Mountain and I mean . . . Have you ever ridden Space Mountain? That ride is one of the most fun rides in all of Magic Kingdom! Usually the only reasons not to use a Fastpass were, you wanted to ride something else or you didn't have time because you had reservations for some restaurant or you wanted to see a show etc. So you'd wait outside the ride, scouting out possible candidates to receive the precious passes. I typically looked for families or young couples (and I mean we're a family of five so we had quite a few passes to give away). Then when you spotted someone you thought was the best possible candidate, you'd flag them down (I've actually run after people before not gonna lie) and then you'd say the most reviered words in all of Disney World, "Hey do you guys need Fastpasses?" And their faces would light up and they'd say, "Yes we do! Wow thank you so much!" And let me tell you, for some reason, just doing that small act made it feel like there was a light shining inside your chest, which usually lasted a few hours too. If I had the power to change something about Disney, I'd bring back the paper fastpasses just for those moments alone. My point to all this, you ask? Selfless acts keeps the suffering at bay . . . If only for a few moments. Suffering is important and reflecting on it is kinda vital for survival . . . But we can't let it consume us. This life isn't about you. This life is about all of us. It's about getting through things together. We get so caught up in our own stories, our own sorrows, our own suffering that we often forget that. Selfless acts no matter how small, is the only thing I've found that really helps (well me at least). The world isn't against you, the universe isn't planning your demise - trust me, no one is that important for the universe to care THAT much- life CAN get a little easier. Suffering is important and a huge part of being human . . . but it's not all there is to life.

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