#PPDC Personnel Files
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Details about Hermann Gottlieb's personality in the novelization that (probably) came from the bio written by Guillermo del Toro.
With Newt and Hermann's bios never being posted on Guillermo del Toro's Twitter account like Mako, Raleigh, and Pentecost's were, I decided to try and comb the novelization for information that might have been derived from their bios, based on it dovetailing with Guillermo del Toro's general writing style and habits. The following is a list of personality/psychological-related stuff that I currently believe were based on Hermann's bio:
Psych evaluation reveals fundamental need to create distance between self and any problem, using data and mathematics as buffer. Obsessive neatness of person and workspace also reveals this impulse to maintain controlling distance. Currently estranged from father due to differences of opinion about value of Jaeger project as opposed to Pacific Perimeter Program.
Inveterate filer of complaints, primarily against Kaiju Science colleague Dr. Newton Geiszler (q.v.). PPDC psychological staff recommends accepting but not acting on these complaints. (p. 73-74)
Note: The above comes from Hermann's personnel dossier. Since Mako, Raleigh, and Pentecost's dossiers are all very clearly abridged versions of the bios Guillermo del Toro wrote, one can assume it's the same for Hermann's.
Also, filing ridiculous complaints is very much the kind of thing del Toro might play for laughs, similar to how the character of Tom Manning was used for comedy in Hellboy and Hellboy II: The Golden Army.
He [Newt] went to the fridge and dug around in it until he had half a salami and cheese sandwich, some German potato salad, and a bag of baby carrots that belonged to Hermann. (p. 98-99.)
Note: Guillermo del Toro's character bios pretty much always mention a number of specific food items characters enjoy eating.
numbers language of the universe and they will hide me I can hide behind them because they are never angry they are never wrong they choose no sides and expect nothing they are purely themselves and will never betray me ... Gottlieb was soldering together a robot can I build an intelligence that will pass a Turing test and if I could of course I can I must never say anything about it until it is done or Father will (p. 268-269)
Note: The above is supposed to represent Hermann's stream of consciousness during his drift with Newt and baby Otachi, hence the odd writing style. With problematic to horrible fathers being a common element in del Toro's work, I think it's a safe guess that this was all based on his bio.
Unfortunately, the novelization omits Hermann's POV except for when he drifts with Newt, so there isn't a lot of material here. But what there is suggests that Hermann was conceptualized as a deeply traumatized individual who tries to avoid conflict wherever possible, likely to the point of avoiding people when he can, and trying to supplicate them when he can't. This, I believe, is evidenced in the elevator scene, where Newt says "Hermann! These are human beings! Why don't you say hello?", and where Hermann (unsuccessfully, lol) tries to head off potential conflict with Raleigh with "You'll have to excuse him, he's a kaiju groupie; he loves them."
(And speaking of the elevator scene, if you haven't seen the extended version where Newt addresses Raleigh as "guy" and tells Hermann to stop saluting Pentecost yet, you should!)
It also seems that Hermann was imagined as someone who tries to cope with all the things he can't control by controlling everything that he can - one notable example being 50% of the k-sci lab. It would appear that "no kaiju entrails on my side of the room!" doesn't just indicate a desire to keep his space physically clean, but it's also indicative of his ongoing refusal to let the chaotic and unpredictable Newt inside emotionally.
So yeah, it would really be great if all of the character bios were released (not to mention the 250 page universe bible... sigh), but... since they aren't, I'm just gonna have to resort to doing stuff like this, lol.
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i am SAD and your writing always makes me feel better (prayers to broken stone was a godsend during a difficult time in my life). how do u feel if i throw the words newmann, fluff, snow and rescue in your general direction
It’s not QUITE a “rescue” yet but, uh… Hermann will come around eventually??? (Also apologies as to where it ends, it was either that or this fic idea was going to be three times as long! Also, thank you for your kind words!)
—
Vladivostok. The most remote Shatterdome. Many saw it as a prison, the least desirable posting in the entirety of the PPDC command structure. It had the smallest population, barely a skeleton crew, mostly populated by the local Siberians. The rotations were short for visiting Jaeger pilots and personnel, they had to be, to prevent the collapse of morale as the never-ending, pounding cold of the far north wore at the defenses of any not born there.
In short, it had been the perfect place for Hermann Gottlieb to escape to, after a disastrous meeting in 2017 with one Newton Geiszler.
There two year long correspondence had crumbled irrevocably on the day they met. Two years of letters, of shared ideas and ideals, of breathless anticipation and, though Hermann would rarely admit it now, even to himself, of desperate pining.
He had thought he’d found an intellectual partner in Newton. Even–as he’d only admitted in his most romantic moments, which grew more frequent with each letter–a soulmate. They’d written papers together. They’d made plans. Every application Hermann had submitted regarding his placement with the PPDC had a small note attached, requesting a shared lab with Newton. Mostly hopeless, the PPDC had thousands of personnel and no time to grant an individual, personal request of such a nature, even to the son of the man who helped found the program. For two years, his and presumably Newton’s request that they be stationed together had been ignored, until they finally took matters into their own hands in 2017 and arranged an in-person meeting.
Never before in Hermann’s life had he been so grateful for a clerical oversight as he was by the end of that day.
Unfortunately, the paperwork took months, if not years to process. Furthermore, he’d been rising through the ranks, gaining seniority. It was very likely that in the near future, he’d get just what he’d desired for so many years: a shared lab with Newton, and the thought was unbearable. He’d typed a new request that night, for a position in the one Shatterdome where he’d be guaranteed a swift transfer and where he could be certain Newton would never go: Vladivostok, at the edge of the world.
Hermann had hated the place on sight. The cold was shattering. It rattled through his body, ringing pain up his leg into what felt like his very soul. On nights where he couldn’t get warm, no matter how many blankets he piled onto the bed, he wondered if it would really be so terrible to risk another meeting with Newton Geiszler if it meant fleeing this frozen hell.
Even on those terrible nights, he silently reminded himself that yes, it would be. Some disappointments ran too deep.
But now, the PPDC was dying.
His father’s wall consumed the Pacific coastlines, destroying marine habitats, blocking the sun, and chewing up the bodies of those too poor or desperate to find any other job and were thus lost to its bloody jaws. The fleet of Jaegers shrank with each attack, never to be replaced. There was rumor of a holdout, in Hong Kong, and a rogue Marshal, Stacker Pentecost.
Always in his life, Hermann had devoted himself to what must be done. Once, his father had been his sole arbiter, his God, his guiding star on what that meant. His father was dead to him now, with his choice of the wall, of death over the Jaeger program that his own son had poured his blood, sweat and tears, not to mention countless sleepless nights to build. Without his father, he had only himself to trust. He would have to choose on his own.
He chose Hong Kong.
Hermann had filed his request two weeks ago and received a terse memo back with what was now today’s date, September 3rd.
Hermann waited on the helicopter pad for an angel to arrive, one that would take him far from his place. He was wearing the heavy green parka gifted to him by Kaidonvskys but it was nowhere near enough to hold back the biting cold.
Minutes ticked by. Just as he thought to go back inside he heard it, the rhythmic thwump of the helicopter blades. He braced himself, placing both gloved hands over the head of his cane, and stood to attention, ignoring the tremor in his leg from the cold. The helicopter blades slowed. The stairs dropped down.
A figure hung out the door, wearing only a leather jacket, and shivering so violently Hermann could it from the edge of the helicopter pad.
“H-Hey! S-Sorry the boss couldn’t make it, guess you’re stuck with me!” said one Newton Geiszler. Hermann would know that voice anywhere.
Hermann turned on his heels and walked back towards the Shatterdome.
“W-Wait!” There was the clomping of footsteps in the snow behind him, muffled swearing at the unmistakable sound of a body slipping on the ice and falling hard, then more scrambling. Hermann sighed as a hand came to rest on his shoulder. A hand without any gloves, of course. Newton’s fingers were flushed red from the cold.
Hermann schooled his expression and turned to face the other man, swallowing to force his heart down from his throat as he looked upon the man he’d fled to the edge of the world to escape. Newton hadn’t changed but then, why would he have in such a short time, only three years? His brown hair was wild from the snow, already dotted with snowflakes and his glasses were steamed almost opaque from his breath.
Newton offered a weak grin. “So the g-good news is our, uh, lab transfer request finally went through. T-The bad news is…uh, I guess our lab transfer request finally went through.”
Hermann sighed and hung his head. “So it would seem.”
#newmann#pacific rim#hermann gottlieb#newton geiszler#pre-canon#my writing#Anonymous#ack if you're an early reader I fixed a bunch of typos please check it again or refresh!
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Tales of the Double D
@friendo-boi EXPRESSED INTERESTED IN ME RAMBLING ABOUT A PACIFIC RIM OC SET SO HERE WE GO
Okay so LEMME TELL YOU ALL ABOUT THE CREW OF AN LA BASED JAEGER
THE DOUBLE D
(For one, Dev promised Dana she could pick the color scheme if he could pick the name).
The Rangers who piloted were an unlikely pair. Dana, born '02, was 12 when Kaiju surfaced in 2013. Dev was 16—born 97.
Why did they come together? Because both of them had family visiting the coast when shit went to hell. Dev had had a fight with his father and stormed off, and Dana's father had a fight with her mother and stormed off.
Dana was looking for him when she found Dev trying to set up a miserable attempt at a campsite on beach. So, forgetting about her father's hissy fit, she helped Dev.
Dev was reluctant to accept her help, but realized he appreciated the company. Not that he had long to consider-he saw the monster first.
So picked up the girl who'd tried to help him with his tent, and ran.
Dev had hoped to spare Dana the reality of the looming monster for a while. Unfortunately she had a pretty clear view over his shoulder. However she never told him.
At the disaster recovery center, Dana's mom found them. And when no one came for Dev, she brought him home toom
Dana never knew the fate of her father, but as he never called or cams home, she assumes dead. Technically bitter about this because of why he was out alone.
Dev saw footage of a long haired lunatic charging the Kaiju in a speedboat. Watching his father's final stand made him unwilling to consider calling home.
SOMEWHERE ALONG THE LINES Bethany also took in Beatrix. She was born '00.
She also got front row seats to Dana and Dev bickering, teasing, and protecting each other for six years.
SKIP AHEAD SIX YEARS. Dana has skipped her final year of high school (making Dev highly insecure about his intelligence), is 17 in 2019, and announces she's been accepted into the Jaeger Academy.
Beatrix had applied when she did for engineering, and Dev had without knowing Dana did.
While Dana excelled in training, she lacked in social ability. Dev was good at that, but academic study settings were always a weakness.
Beatrix began an affair with a Ranger just enough older it caused Dev to become hyper aware of how few years were between him and Dana.
Not helped by Beatrix blatantly saying she was pretty sure Dana had feelings for him.
Though Dana had spent years sneaking into his room by then, it was to snuggle because she heard him having nightmares.
He'd always considered his recent thoughts and feelings highly inappropriate-she was then 17, he was 21. She was pure and good, and he wad a trouble making philanderer.
But when Trix, then 18, began an affair with someone five years older, and began asking them what they should do for Dana's 18th birthday, it was on his mind a lot.
Once, Dana got in a fight, shocking both of her friends. She was petite, and had never favored violence. But someone had suggested growing up on the East Coast of the US, she and hrr friends hadn't lost anything.
Dana was one and a half trimesters in, so her previous chubbyness and baby fat were gone as a result of training. Thus, she was able to lunge.
Trix and Dev pulled her off the other Trainee. There was a reprimand, on both she and the one who had antagonized her. Chores were given to both for the rest of the trimester.
At the end of their second trimester, Dana and Dev were told their charts and interactions led officials to believe they were drift compatible, and tests would begin.
Dana rejoiced. Dev panicked. He wasn't particularly private, but there were things he didn't want Dana aware of. How the Kaiju in San Francisco still haunted him. How he was sure if she hadn't stopped to help him, she'd have found her father. How he felt about her.
How Trix had taken to whispering days left till her birthday like a devil on his shoulder, usually followed by a 'then you won't have any excuses, you coward'.
Thus, a week before her birthday, on the first day of their third Trimester, the drift was not strong. In fact the Drift was practically blocked. Dana had doven in, opening her heart and mind. But Dev had been focused on filtering.
When she confronted him, Dev panicked, announced 'woop, woop, wood', and fled.
(Beatrix fell over laughing from the observation room).
That night, Dev tried to get drunk, and maybe laid. His flirtation attempts were foiled by Dana appearing and slapping him. Before he could protest, he realized she'd been crying, and smelled a bit like whiskey he knew Trix had a stash of.
"I trust you. With my life. My heart. My soul. I thought you cared about me, and I was so excited I'd have a way to tell you how I felt without the words. But instead you blocked me out and Zoidberged out of the room!"
"Because I'm a hot mess and I know once you know how I look at you, there's no going back!"
Where, when, and how Beatrix got the mistletoe and rigged it from a wooden dowel to dangle like a fishing pole, Dev honestly didn't know. Nor did he have time before Dana took the chance to jump up and hug tight, dangling a couple inches off the ground and muttering how he was a big dummy.
Beatrix suggested they wait to try again till after Dana's birthday.
"You know. In case you tear each other's clothing off after."
It turned out to be pretty useful advice, as that day the drift was strong. And both saw each other through one another's eyes.
(The other trainees and rangers helpfully and cheerfully decided it was hysterical to toss rubbers at them when Dana snagged his hand and Dev followed her lead with a big, dumb, telling grin.)
Skip ahead. Valentines Day, they get the ultimate gift of a Jaeger and posting. They're assigned to the LA Dome.
And that was when shit started to fall apart.
During a test, Dev learned from his co-pilots mind she had missed a few periods. Despite being a highly responsible duo, they came to the usual assumption and sought one of the PPDC doctors.
They were wrong.
Apparently earlier practice runs in older Jaegers had exposed them both to a certain amount of radiation. While it seemed they weren’t in mortal peril (yet at least), it had basically rendered her infertile.
It wasn’t that either of them had planned to have children-but it was simply because as life was, they refused to plan anything, with the future so uncertain. The loss of the option stung.
Dev did become more worried about Dana, as after she became more intense in the drift, more determined, and focused.
And rather then work through the feelings, she was blocking them out.
This probably wouldn’t have been as big a deal if shortly after their station, Beatrix’s lover hadn’t been killed in action. Their lead tech became distraught, and less focused. She preformed all the basic checks, but failed to meet her usual high standards of tune up.
Ironically when the tragedy occurred, that might have been why the Drift and Con Pod acted so very peculiar.
During the fight, the neural handshake held, but the Rangers were reckless. At one point they were knocked back violently, jarring both rangers in their harnesses. Because of the height difference, Dana had always been extra secured. Dev, on the other hand, fell limp, hanging from his like a rag doll. His vitals dropped, and back at the Dome, his readings proclaimed brain death.
Dana was in shock, unable to remember they were in a fight. Unable to remember she shouldn’t be trying to pilot alone. Just crying his name out. Only realizing the danger when Beatrix screamed hers through the radio.
The Kaiju was bounding down. Dana turned, but it wasn’t the arm she controlled or willed to move. The opposite arm lashed out, blocking his attack, and she heard Dev’s voice still.
“You’re not taking her!”
Dana would claim they took down the Kaiju. And more notably, she maintained he was still there, in the drift with her. Thus, she refused to disengage until a solution was found.
She may have threatened to do some serious damage if they tried to disengage her without maintaining him.
In the end, Dana was dismissed. But not without them listening. No one is really sure if Dev is actually there or not, but they did rig her a unit resembling a google glass with a massive flash drive in it, to constantly run the drift-even when she’s not wearing it. Occasionally this is necessary to charge it, for instance. There are safety guards to put it in a very low power mode, just in case.
Though, Trix has noticed Dana’s reflexes seem to be a lot better then before the incident. And occasionally she wears a smirk a little more Dev then Dana...
Trix would remain as a floating Tech in the PPDC, and eventually, began another relationship-with an individual considered completely inappropriate as he was over ten years her senior.
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ACCESSING PERSONNEL FILE 。。。 ACCESS GRANTED !
RE: CADET #950921 • • • KIM , JONGDAE
ASSIGNED TO STRIKE , EVALUATION SCORE OF < 570 > POINTS
THOUGH WE ARE IN THE EYE OF THE STORM
At twenty-two, Jongdae barely remembers what it’s like to not live with the looming threat of a kaiju attack on the horizon. But it hadn’t always been like that… or, at least, not for him it hadn’t.
The second son of a successful business mogul, Jongdae led a charmed life from the moment of his birth. Everything from the best schools to the newest tech, Jongdae had the world at his fingertips. Maybe that’s why Jongdae remained so unfazed when the first kaijus attacked. He knew they were dangerous, just like how he knew that hurricanes were destructive or that earthquakes were unpredictable, but, at the end of the day, that didn’t mean all too much to eight year old Jongdae.
The kaiju might’ve been a threat to humanity but they were never a threat to him.
It’s how nine years later, Jongdae found himself in Hong Kong with some friends, ignoring his parents overbearing concern as he took in the sight of the bone slums for the first time in his life, finally understanding what sort of monster could leave a skeleton like that behind.
Too bad that realization came far too late as category III kaiju broke past the PPDC defense and razed the city.
Completely losing all but one of his friends in the panicked frenzy that followed as the klaxons blared and ground shook with the force of each of the monster’s footsteps, Jongdae never made it to a refuge in time. Instead, he blindly ran into the closest building he saw, dragging his friend with him as the kaiju’s approaching roar deafened them both.
That was Jongdae’s second mistake.
Five days.
Jongdae remained trapped in the remains of that building for five days after the attack - screaming himself hoarse as every little noise had his heart jackrabbiting at the thought the building would finish collapsing on top of him. Trapped in the darkness, his only measure of time coming from the screams that slowly but surely started petering off, the only thing that kept him sane in that tiny hell was his friend.
They’d been classmates before the attack - friends that hung out with the same crowd, but after five days together, they became more than that. They knew each others’ fears, their secrets, all the regrets that came to light when they’d both thought they were on the brink of death, so when they both emerged from the rubble, pulse thready and barely conscious, they both knew there was no one else they’d rather see the end with than each other.
At eighteen, they both joined the Academy in the hopes of becoming Rangers…
WE SHALL STAND STRONG LIKE TITANS
And not once during their four years there did Jongdae ever doubt that they were drift compatible. Not when they both suffered from the same nightmares night after night only to wake up each day more determined than before to finally put a stop to the kaiju.
And Jongdae wasn’t wrong… or, at least, not entirely.
Because all those years of long hours training in the kwoon room followed by even longer hours pouring over books finally paid off when they drifted for the first time. They were compatible just like Jongdae always knew they would be.
But somehow even that wasn’t enough because when it came time to truly test their compatibility during a Con-Pod simulation during their fourth year, all their hard work went up in smoke. Because it was one thing for them to pass the drift sync test and a whole other thing to suddenly face down the very monster of their nightmares during a simulation.
There was no stopping his friend from chasing the rabbit just like there was nothing Jongdae could do to pull his friend out of the memory- not when he was doing his level best to stay in alignment himself.
They were forcefully ejected from the simulation before it could get any worse.
But the damage had already been done. Each time they attempted to drift after that, their compatibility scores just kept dropping. So Jongdae wasn’t surprised when his friend told him he’d dropped from the ranger program. He’d already known it would happen. After all, Jongdae had felt the regret and shame and anger and bitterness during their last drift like if it were his own.
And maybe it was because Jongdae had never been this close to his dream while, at the same time, that close to losing it all.
But Jongdae hasn’t survived so much to quit now. Not when the only way he’ll ever be able to rest easy is once he makes it into a jaeger of his own and he finally has the power to fight back.
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tw: cancer
:// CERBERUS ALPHA PERSONNEL FILE
so this hot mess of a want ad is for the crew of the cerberus alpha. this is a veteran mark I jaeger with three geezer faces and the children of the man that built their monster. they all love each other very much, but at times it gets very gallagher family in the mess hall, okay? the hendrix (can be changed since i’m almost positive someone has a hendrix) kids were pretty much adopted by the crew as their father was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer that took him out of commission. now i figure you're wondering: well, why the hell didn't she mention the mother of those adorable hendrix kids? well, she's either a) still alive, but fucked off somewhere or b) she passed away, i'm leaving that up to you.
before we get much farther please note: i'm pretty chill and open to other face suggestions so don’t be shy.
eleanor fox / ranger & pilot of cerberus alpha / 36 / call sign: persephone
ellie is...a lunatic to put it mildly. the nickname ‘texan terror’ has been following her around for most of her life and she lives up to it, lemme tell ya. she’s the youngest and only daughter (god, can you imagine? six boys and one girl yiiiikesss) and growing up she was definitely a tomboyish sort. her daddy was a lawman and her momma was a rodeo star and small-town beauty queen. when she wants something she goes after it hard which is how she made it into the ppdc to begin with. she’s a very loud, opinionated in-your-face gal and you probably won’t ever have to sit there and agonize over what she thinks about you because she’ll tell you right to your face. admittedly she can be too much for a lot of people, but she does have a really good heart underneath all the noise and bravado. at the point in her life and career she’s kind of at a crossroads at the moment because her drift partner (and the guy she’s kinda fallen for rip) has been talking about retiring. she isn’t sure what she wants to do just yet and she’s not sure if she’s ready to give up the fight, but she also doesn’t want to be partnered with anyone else.
(tentative fc: milla jovovich)
first last / ranger & pilot of cerberus alpha / 40 / call sign: hades
where ellie is right hemisphere this guy is definitely the left. the ice to her fire and more inclined to see reason than his partner his motives for joining the ppdc were based in that of grief and a need for revenge for his family. a career military man that just turned forty has him re-examining his capabilities and after a pretty close call that resulted in the almost total loss of their jaeger (and their lives) so he’s been thinking about retiring. ellie is not a fan of this idea obviously because she fears abandonment like whoa. anyway, he’s emotionally shutdown and has been for a long ass time and she’s been working away at him for years. fuck loads of slow burn and angst and shitty fights and gross denial of gross codependent relationship and side eyes before entering the drift. they take care of each other and they pilot the cerberus alpha and I have so many feelings about slowburn relationships don’t look at me.
(suggested fc: karl urban)
first last / loccent officer of cerberus alpha / age
this darling man has put up with a lot over the years from the crew of the cerberus. his job has kind of made him the living embodiment of the 'voice of reason' in this merry band of misfits and he blames them all for his graying hair. outside of his position as loccent controller for the cerberus alpha he is a quiet, introverted man and is often the victim of many harebrained schemes by his coworkers to set him up on dates. he handles it all with a surprising amount of grace and humility but...don't make him angry.
(suggested: mark ruffalo, andrew lincoln, chiwetel ejiofor, hugh dancy, michael ealy)
first hendrix / jaeger technician for cerberus alpha / age
oldest child of the man who built the cerberus alpha, she grew up working around the machines her father built and discovered that she had a fascination with them as well. her father's star pupil and protégé she's really just trying to keep it together for her brother as their father undergoes chemotherapy. she both looks up to and is often frustrated by the crew of the cerberus and is often far too serious for her own good, which is usually why ellie ribs her so much.
(suggested: pretty much anyone tbh)
first hendrix / tbd / age
the baby of their weird little family he is very spoiled and very confused about what direction he wants to take in life. with the future uncertain and the fact that nobody likes you when you're 23 (blink-182, had to do it) he's kind of in a 'blah stage' where he just hangs out with in the hangar with his sister and pesters ellie constantly. he's actually a fairly decent artist and they've been having him decorate the cerberus whenever inspiration strikes him. he views these people as his family and takes everything they say to heart (a little too much sometimes.)
(suggested: pretty much anyone tbh)
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ACCESSING PERSONNEL FILE 。。。 ACCESS GRANTED !
RE: CADET #901013 • • • PARK , JIMIN
ASSIGNED TO STRIKE , EVALUATION SCORE OF < 330 > POINTS
THOUGH WE ARE IN THE EYE OF THE STORM
17 08 2003, Busan, SK
“Hello, I’m Kim Yumi for KBS1. We’re dedicating this edition of our daily news cast to our audience in the US. The US is reeling this week, trying to recover from the recent attack of the deep underwater creature. Scientists are still working to identify the source of the animal, and what its motive for invading land could have been. Kaiju are what researchers are confirming as the official identity of the creature. The kaiju completely demolished the city of San Francisco and what it left behind is nothing short of scenes of utter chaos and destruction. Tens of thousands of american citizens..”
Kaiju, Jimin stares in awe of it, “–it’s like… a dinosaur–”
“–No, son. It’s like a God.”
Jimin couldn’t agree with his father, no God did what the Kaiju did to all those people. However, he stayed silent.
“Foolish Americans. Of course the apocalypse would hit them first. That country’s full of sinful idiots. We all pay for their sins, God is here to punish us–”
“But it was only one, Appa,” Jimin corrects, finally turning to face his parents, the gentle thud of his mother’s rocking chair hitting against the floor as she sewed the hole in his shorts was comforting, keeping him from getting too sucked into the reality of the creature plaguing and then dying on land, on Earth. His gaze brushed against his father, also in awe of the Kaiju but for a very different cause. His father’s spectacles matched the glisten of his own, except his old man wore them well, the gray hairs slicked next the the black ones right near his ear gave him the wise doctor look that he just knows his mother fawns over.
“Do you think they won’t come back, my son?”
The thuds stopped.
“I– The scientists didn’t say so– all the articles I read, they-they said it was supposed to be an i-isolated incident–”
“The world’s ending, Jimin-ah,” his father finalized, cutting his son’s awful stuttering short, “And for the better. It’s best we get on the right side. You’ve taken interest in them because you’re a loyal child of God. He wants you to dedicate your life to the creatures that will bring us salvation.”
The Kaiju, it did nothing but ruin a city, kill people, why would his father have such positive regard? Far enough to say that God sent it. Jimin thinks it’s hefty, just to be interested in a creature to dedicate his life to it, to know the only one that probably will ever lived died already in an entirely different country. How does his father expect him to do that?
“In due time, son,” when his mother started to rock, the thud was harsh against his ears, he didn’t like the sound of it anymore, “you shall know your purpose.”
14 06 2008, Seoul, SK
Jimin, sat on top of the steps in front of his home, looks out into the horizon. The day is several shades of gray, only can see the sun peeking through darkened clouds through cracks. With is palm squished upon his cheek, he digs his toe into the hard of their wooden porch. Despite the gloomy weather, Summers in Korea are humid nonetheless, and his jumpsuit is suffocating him.
He looks down upon the gray fabric, stark black boots, and figures gray isn’t a good color on him. He sees ‘Park’ on his breast, his Cadet number, and realizes this is it.
His father has been raving about this day all of Jimin’s life. Kaiju have taken over his home, and it is all his father lives for. His old man was right all those years ago, the Kaiju did come back, and with a vengeance, always stronger, or different than the last, coming out on top, superior to the human race, just like his father predicted, just like his father insisted God sent them for.
His father seen no other purpose for Jimin, other than to learn about these creatures, exploiting Jimin’s love for science, and forcing him to join the Jaeger Academy with a focus of Kaiju Biology. Jimin would rather be far away from those things. Always wanted to be a doctor, like his father, to help people, especially ones who have been affected by the disasters that have struck from Kaiju attacks.
But Jimin had no options, just orders.
A Kaiju Biologist he would be, because God and his father willed it so. That was his purpose.
“Jimin, son, are you ready?”
He’s already said goodbye to his mother, hugged his little sister Joori a little tighter because her time would come soon, but he couldn’t hold on any longer. The Jaeger Academy stationed in Seoul wasn’t far, but definitely not close enough to see his family much, not that he wanted to with the resentment he held for them. He didn’t want to be a Cadet in the Academy. He didn’t want to waste precious years on the beings he’s heard countless times were his saviors, while his eyes saw nothing but destruction from them.
“Yes, Appa. I’m ready.”
His purpose awaits.
20 02 2010, Seoul, SK
It was lunchtime in the Academy when Jimin’s life completely changed.
The food was terrible, and could be comparable to quality of a prison, but Jimin never complained much. Just silently ate with the friend’s he’s made. There was an announcement made suddenly that there was another Kaiju attack that had everyone in the room silent to listen.
Another Kaiju hit in the U.S., where he knows his father went on a business trip to perform surgery on an American who specifically asked for his surgeons as he was well renowned for his performance in the medical field, but this time it was Florida. Exactly where his family had gone. The news was turned on in the TV’s in the Academy, and Jimin, because murmurs were starting to drown out the TV shot up to here the newscaster better.
There were already many deaths, but locations of those deaths, or who those people were never identified, only leaving Jimin with more desperation of if his family was okay.
He needed to call them, to see if they made it out safely, but tears were already forming because in cities where Kaiju attacked, people rarely did.
He was already heading out the cafeteria when a page was running toward him, stopping him before he escaped and told him he had a international phone call.
The tears dropped.
16 05 2017, Seoul, SK
“M’sorry, Ma, I just have to get it in there,” Jimin apologized at his mother’s hisses of pain. After the attack seven years ago, his mother’s face was left disfigured from Kaiju Blue, and cleaning her wounds were still a challenge as the skin remained sensitive, even after so many years.
His sister was fine as his parents kept left her in the hotel when they went for lunch the day of the attack, which evacuated when the Kaiju rose from the sea, but his father hadn’t made it at all. His mother didn’t give details, but she was there, and Jimin’s sure his father had acted recklessly, always dreaming of seeing or touching a Kaiju in real life. God’s gift, is what he called it, so he’s sure his father wasn’t scared. That was his downfall.
His mother clearly made it, but was sprayed by Kaiju Blue, leaving her entire face disfigured from the Acidic mist. She’s lucky she didn’t just die, and that paramedics were immediately on hand to keep her alive, though sometimes, Jimin thinks she wishes she had.
While his sister is a Ranger in the PPDC, Jimin is left to take care of their mother. Other than that, his days have been spent trying to get into his residency, but he doesn’t know that he wants that. His mother has been trying to convince him of entering back into the academy, and becoming a Medic – telling him all about his purpose again and what he was put on this Earth for, sounding a lot like his father. But, after Joori training accident a year ago, he was more partial to the idea. He could be a part of the PPDC and actually help people like he wants to. His father’s perception of Kaiju has stuck to him so closely, he forgot that he could have a purpose in the Academy, to help people.
And while he cleans his mother’s wounds, he decided despite being the perfect candidate for a residency lined up for him, he wouldn't’t take it. And instead re-enrolled into the Academy to continue his studies there in order to become a Medic in the strike group.
He doesn’t know if it’s to his dismay, or pleasure, but in the PPDC, his purpose does await.
WE SHALL STAND STRONG LIKE TITANS
Jimin joined the Academy forcibly when he turned 18 (2008). His father wanted him to study Kaiju and be a Kaiju Biologist and Jimin had little choice in the matter. Jimin climbed ranks quickly mainly because the study of Kaiju had been interesting to a lover of science, and made it to Class C. However, when his father died, and his mother was badly disfigured from Kaiju Blue, he seen his way out after two years, and discharged himself from the Academy and instead went to a University in Seoul to become a surgeon. He barely stepped his feet in his residency before he had decided to become a Medic in the PPDC instead. Because he had no field training, and only training with Kaiju Blue years ago when he was in the Academy, he had to re-enroll as a Medic in Training. Now he is a Class C Medic in the strike group, and his main job is to aid cadets, and rangers when they become injured.
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RE: CADET #940915 • • • LEE , MIJOO
ASSIGNED TO J-TECH , EVALUATION SCORE OF < 610 > POINTS
THOUGH WE ARE IN THE EYE OF THE STORM
Nine.
Mijoo was nine when San Francisco bore witness to the brutality of the first kaijou attack, an attack that lasted six long days leaving the world much different than it was before. She remembers her parents trying to stop her from watching the news channels at home but it was just as easy to slip out of the house and run to the nearest corner restaurant where everyone sat with their eyes glued to the small TV playing on the counter, their lunches quite forgotten on the green tables in front of them.
Kaijou.
It was an unfamiliar word, one that evoked fear in most but curiosity in others. For Mijoo it was a mixture of both. Why had the giant monsters come here to wreck havoc? Where had they come from? She knew she wasn’t alone in her questions but there were few if any answers available.
Eleven.
2005 was the start of something new, something big, something that could help them turn the tide against the creatures who were threatening everything humanity held dear. Both Mijoo’s parents (engineers) were recruited by the PPDC to work on the Jaeger prototype so they moved to Seoul with her in tow. Seeing the Shatterdome for the first time was a breathtaking experience and one that she would never forget for as long as she lived. Mijoo clutched onto her mother’s hand tightly as they walked around, overwhelmed by the sheer scale of things but it was the sense of community, of purpose, that she remembered the most. The thought of working towards a common goal with so many other souls was truly humanity at its finest.
Fourteen.
The Kaijou war was at its height and Jaegers were a shining beacon of hope. Whilst in times past kids would collect cards of their favourite sports stars or singers, Mijoo collected facts and statistics about every single Jaeger, memorising them until she could answer any question throw her way. Weekends often saw her sat at one of her parents’ offices with a visitors pass around her neck as she poured over books concerning engineering, mechanics, and nuclear reactors. One day she too would work on a jaeger. Luckily for her she had a knack for visualising drawings and blueprints and nimble fingers to put things together. Assembling and disassembling mechanical things became somewhat of a second nature to her, often under the watchful eye (when they could be spared) of her parents.
WE SHALL STAND STRONG LIKE TITANS
Eighteen.
The year she turned eighteen Mijoo decided to enlist in program in hopes of realising her dream of contributing towards their survival. Things were looking bleak. Kaijous were adapting to the jaegers and suddenly they were on the defensive, up against the ropes as they constantly became pummelled barely scraping by. Seeing jaegers being torn to shreds made her heart ache. All that time and effort swept away in one swipe of a claw or a tail, those lives of pilots so easily snuffed out in a single second. It was disheartening.
Twenty-one.
The breach was closed. It was over. For now. There were those who said it was done, the kaijou were never coming back, they could finally celebrate. Mijoo wasn’t so sure. If they couldn’t come through the breach they’d find a different way back. There was no way they’d let Earth go now, not after they got their asses handed to them. No, she’d stay at the academy and work even harder to prepare for the second wave, because something told her it would be even more devastating than anything they’d faced before.
Twenty-three.
Five years of her life had been spent as a cadet. Five years of gruelling work, little sleep, bruises, cuts, and burns. But she wouldn’t trade it for anything. Mijoo had learnt so many new things both about herself and about jaegers. She’d faced every challenge given to her by the instructors and passed them all, some in an unconventional manner. Some thought her talented, others thought her loud and obnoxious, ill-suited for working with j-tech. Mijoo, or Tes as she’d nicknamed herself, faced the criticism with a smile and a shrug. So what? You couldn’t please everyone. As long as her work was deemed good quality who the hell was to tell her that she didn’t belong.
Whilst she wasn’t be rubbing shoulders with the top of the five percent of her class she was very happy being in the top quartile. There wasn’t anything particularly outstanding in her personnel file though the few notes that existed commented on her tenacity and ability to think creatively… which wasn’t the best when given a test with strict parameters. Despite being on the track for being an engineer, Tes enjoys keeping the physical training and sparring exercises her striker peers take part in on her schedule, usually in her free time, and is no stranger to the practice rooms.
Blood, sweat, motor oil, and welding burns: that was her life now.
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RE: OFFICER #960903 • • • PARK , SOOYOUNG
ASSIGNED TO J-TECH , EVALUATION SCORE OF < 1120 > POINTS
THOUGH WE ARE IN THE EYE OF THE STORM
( tw! negligence, death, violence, sexual implications )
i.
a family history teeming with scandal, with strife, and with sin, it’s a wonder she would be allowed into the academy, that she would even choose to attend, but park sooyoung has decidedly been one thing since birth: stubborn. while her father was obsessed with the kaiju, sooyoung thought the jaegers were the true beauties of the war.
where she saw useless destruction, he saw profit. materialistic and money-hungry to the verycore, her father knew more about trafficking and forgery than he did about being a family man.
he only sees blue.
ii.
she’s eight the first time her father shows her a skinmite, and she has to pretend she’s not disgusted by the way it wiggles about while he describes the way they’ve figured out how to preserve them, a conversation he’s had with an associate in hong kong that’s taught him ‘wonders’ as he says. the vapor is poison and he’s scarred by his own excursions into the field but it doesn’t curb his greed.
her father now sees green.
ten years her elder, her oldest brother is the chosen one, the heir to their father’s sins. a heavy burden but one he’s been trained for as long as she can remember. his specialty is recon and he’s the first in her family to find out about lee jeon’s ideas. he’s also one of the first to volunteer as a test subject. his record’s perfect, every black mark scrubbed clean, but even he’s not strong enough to survive. a plan gone awry, because he wanted the jaegers to win just as much as she did, something she only finds out years later because of the present he leaves in her hand.
iii.
babysitters and nannies are all she knows. her mother is rarely around, elusive and evasive, but sooyoung’s always known she was the unwanted child. a daughter is a risk, and she learns just why when she’s left alone with her nanny’s husband. comfort only comes in a locked door but it’s just too close.
the next day, she insists on joining her second brother for lessons. it only takes her a month to knock her nanny’s husband out cold for even looking at her again.
she sees red.
iv.
she’s sixteen when she trusts another man again. sixteen when she learns the inner workings of the rogue jaegers her father has, and still sixteen when she realizes no one is who they truly say they are. he’s an engineer that’s too familiar with the ppdc jaegers and yet she doesn’t realize, doesn’t see that he’s a tangled web of lies. if only sooyoung was as adept as her brother, as observant, then maybe she could’ve saved him when he’d done nothing wrong to her except offer her a way out.
her father makes a show of his betrayal and his only mercy is granting a final wish. sooyoung’s surprised when it involves her. five minutes and sooyoung wishes she had left within the first, that she hadn’t allowed him to speak.
now she’s only left with one choice.
WE SHALL STAND STRONG LIKE TITANS
v.
her father’s jaegers decommissioned and the stadium destroyed, she leaves chaos in her wake just as the storm begins.
the jaeger program is ending but it doesn’t stop her from trying, from applying to the academy. once she makes her choice, she runs and she hasn’t looked back since.
but scandal still follows her.
spiteful gossip and reckless words. a fight that starts with, “the breach has just been closed and you want to talk about me?”
the worst of it is yet to come. some of her fellow cadets are just like her father, they only see a shade of green.
vi.
planted evidence and rogue sparring sessions, sooyoung makes due even though she doesn’t need to fight. she doesn’t want to be a ranger. from the beginning, she’s decided no one will be able to get inside her head.
( she wouldn’t be able to look at them if they did. )
vii.
weapons training comes easy, taking them apart becomes habit, and trying to enhance them becomes addictive. just like that, she’s found it, her own specialty and, this time, no one can take it from her. she still hears of her father’s transactions, of how he’s rebuilt, and she looks ahead at the target in front of her, a new prototype-gun for the strike troopers in hand.
if her father aims for destruction, she’ll strive to protect.
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RE: CADET #921022 • • • LEE , HAEUN
ASSIGNED TO STRIKE , EVALUATION SCORE OF < 630 > POINTS
THOUGH WE ARE IN THE EYE OF THE STORM
jeju island: endless beaches, waves, glorious houses, and best of all, money. growing up in a beautiful and lavishing house on jeju island left the young lee hauen to live out the childhood most children only dreamt of. glimmering pools, expensive cars and two thousand acres of land, truly it was a paradise on earth - far away from any disarray. the lee family was undoubtedly rich, but they were also incredibly humble. philanthropist parents tried their best to teach their only child about giving and never taking too much, the world already had enough selfish people.and of course, the young haeun learned from the best. her mother was a special woman, with a soft heart and even a softer touch. she loved haeun, almost madly and the two of them shared a special bond. her mother dreamed of turning haeun into a smart and kind woman, a woman ready to fight for herself and others.
unfortunately, she didn’t live long enough to see her dream come true. it was supposed to be another boring business trip to sudney, but haeun’s mother sadly never came back. the nuclear disaster that destroyed half of the city also killed her mother. at first, she didn’t want to believe in all the stories, didn’t want to acknowledge the existence of such monsters, but the death of her mother showed haeun the real world. and how cruel it could be. yet she had to move on, had to keep living and trying. there were no other options. she suppressed her bad memories and greeted each new day with smile upon her face. she was never focused on stories about horrible monsters that wanted to destroy the world. no - she only wanted to see the beauty in the world. but the pain never truly went away. and so, an obedient and kind little girl slowly turned into a clever and observant teenager, with a head full of ideas and dreams about helping and changing the world. she high school graduation day came quicker than she had anticipated and she was finally ready to step into a new world and forget her past. she was capable of doing anything and as one of the top students in her whole generation, haeun practically had everything served on a silver platter and she enrolled into one of the best law universities in korea without a single worry.
however, she didn’t plan to fall in love. he was a few years older than her, but haeun simply couldn’t help herself. her heart made that choice instead of her. he was kind, smart and always willing to help others, which she loved so much about him and it didn’t take long for her to discover that her was a member of the PPDC. at first she was shocked, to say the least, but she loved him far too much to just leave him for such a stupid reason. she dreamed about spending the rest of her life with him, dreamed of having a simple life. in spite of that, her worries never truly subsided and for a good reason. after all, her mother was dead because of those horrible monsters and he was always a possible target. and then another tragedy struck.
WE SHALL STAND STRONG LIKE TITANS
just a few days before her 21st birthday, haeun had received the news about the death of her boyfriend. it was another accident or so they claimed but haeun knew the truth. angered and bitter, she wanted revenge and justice. justice for all those who had lost their lives because of the kaijus. justice for her mother and the love of her love. however, she knew that no one was going to give it to her and that she had to go out and seize it. she quit law school and by the end of 2014 she joined the jager academy. of course, it wasn’t a simple process, but she did her best to persuade those in charge to let her join. after all, she was an amazing student, with perfect scores and they needed more people like her. and of course, no one can stand in the way of those who have a true purpose in their life. she’s always trying her best and her resentment is the best motivator, at least for her. there’s not a thing that she’s not willing to do and she’s a perfectionist without a doubt. the academy is all that she has left and she’ll do anything to achieve complete success.
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RE: CADET #980412 • • • KIM , DOYEON
ASSIGNED TO STRIKE , EVALUATION SCORE OF < 310 > POINTS
THOUGH WE ARE IN THE EYE OF THE STORM
o kaiju kings, lead us down into your paradise below the seas and vanquish all who oppose your supreme reign.
-
she’s only five when it happens: the world rips open and spits out a monster intent on devouring all of humanity until they bring its rampage to a screeching halt. doyeon remembers watching the ordeal on television with her parents, six days of death and destruction, six days of a nightmare come to life, and it feels so far away to her, sitting in her cozy home. but her mother’s fretful voice fills the room as the battle rages on—”it’s not right,” she says. “it’s just not right.”
only years later does doyeon realize her mother’s criticism wasn’t for the kaiju, it was for the people daring to stand up to a god.
-
at night, doyeon dreams.
restless, bloody, crushing dreams: the seas parting, the ground shaking, the screams and wretched sobbing of the people fleeing the coast. thick, scaled legs crushing cars underfoot, thunderous roars ringing in her ears, the gaping maw of the kaiju right above her—
she wakes up drenched in her own sweat, crying into her blanket. when her mother asks her what’s wrong, she describes the the nightmare while shaking. after a long pause, her mother strokes her head absentmindedly, calming her down. “i know how powerful fear can be,” she says, “but i don’t think you need to fear these creatures, darling. everything in this world has a purpose.”
what is it, she wants to ask, but doesn’t, just grips her mother instead. her comfort isn’t very comforting, and the nightmares persist. she dies a hundred times in her sleep and wonders what the kaijus’ purpose could possibly be.
-
her father is a military man. his response to the continuing kaiju attacks is to join the newly formed pan pacific defense corps, intent on becoming a ranger. “we have to beat these things back from our shores,” he says with distaste, and her mother stiffens at his words.
“the kaiju are here to cleanse the earth,” she responds. “they will destroy the sinners and create a new world for the chosen ones. if you get into one of those machines, the kaiju will crush you.” doyeon’s eyes stray to the red book of the buenakai, the collected holy words of the kaiju worshipers her mother spends most of her time with these days. they prophesy the end of the world at the hands of the kaiju and call it salvation.
the buenakai flock to the streets in their red robes, proselytizing freely about the kaiju as the messengers of the gods, the advents of a new civilization sent by a higher power. they play on fear and uncertainty to turn people into believers, lure them in with the promise of a better world. but doyeon looks at them and thinks that they scare her almost as much as the kaiju do. they want their ‘gods’ to remold the earth and don’t care how many drown in the process.
“you’re mad,” her father says finally. “there are no gods here, just monsters.”
her mother doesn’t say much after that, but doyeon hears her praying to the sea later in the night. “majestic creatures from beyond our horizons, deliver us from suffering and strike the evil from our hearts.”
doyeon remembers her dreams. she remembers the ruins of san francisco, manila, cabo san lucas, sydney. she remembers the different kaiju, their names slipping through her fingers like their deadly blue blood. what destroys cannot save. she loves her mother, but in this she agrees with her father: kaiju are terrifying abominations that need to be exterminated.
she wants them gone.
-
in the end, her father doesn’t become a ranger, but he does join the ppdc strike trooper unit instead. her mother still disapproves and the house is filled with tense silences when both her parents are around, but she spends more and more time convening with the local buenakai at their towering churches. she tries to bring doyeon along with her (“think of your soul”) but doyeon would rather be with her father, and her mother only stares past her impassively as she says, “i’ll pray for you.”
her father takes her out shopping and buys her food. at home, he teaches her about the ppdc and their mission, and when doyeon shyly tells him about her nightmares, he takes the time to explain jaegers to her. “look,” he says, pulling out the newspaper and pointing to the headline splashed on the front page. “jaegers are protectors. they take care of the kaiju for us so kids like you don’t have to worry.” doyeon runs her fingers over the pixelated image of the jaeger and bites her lip.
“mom calls them false prophets,” she says. godslayers. the buenakai scorn the attempts of the ppdc to combat the pacific threat and claim they will be punished for defying the kaiju eventually. salvation is hard to swallow, but she has no problems believing that the kaiju can dole out cruel punishments. she worries that jaegers aren’t enough, that her mother is right and they’ll fail eventually.
but her father is confident. “we’re stronger than that.” he’s always believed in people above some kind of higher power. we drive our own destinies and all that. he would be the type to rebel against heaven if necessary, and doyeon finds comfort in his strong, steady presence.
under his guidance, she learns the names of all the active jaegers in the incheon shatterdome. he buys her figurines of jaegers and books on technology with posters of triumphant pilots tucked inside—”keep it a secret from your mom,” he says, winking, and doyeon finds hiding places in the house away from her mother’s sharp eyes, not willing to have her things confiscated and having yet another prayer book forced on her in return.
at night, she thinks about heroes and doesn’t dream at all.
-
a kaiju makes landfall in busan eventually.
doyeon stands frozen in terror as the alarms start to blare. people stream out of their apartment building, jostling each other and falling down the stairs in their hurry to get away as she watches from the balcony, not sure where to go or what to do. the strike troopers crawl the streets, ushering people into the anti-kaiju shelter as quickly as possible. her father included, who’d held her face before he left and said, “get to the shelter and wait for me. i’ll come get you when it’s over.” but she can’t move and the foundations of the building shake and all she can hear is screaming and—
her mother finally drags her out by the arm; both of doyeon’s hands are clasped over her ears to block out the awful sounds of people dying and the kaiju roaring. she isn’t scared. the look on her face is almost reverent as she gazes at the silhouette of the kaiju in the distance. “we shouldn’t be running and hiding,” she grumbles, as they crowd into the shelter near the buenakai church. “we are the chosen ones; we have nothing to fear.” her voice grows sharper. “only sinners will die today.” the people around her—the believers—nod and murmur in assent.
doyeon crouches down in the corner and tries to block their prayers out, focusing instead on the frantic beating of her heart, the swallow breaths, and recites the names of all the different jaegers in her head to keep from spiraling.
the ordeal spans hours. when they finally emerge out of the shelter, it’s into a different world altogether. little traces of the city she remembers remain, and her knees buckle at the sight of such carnage. amidst the rubble are bodies and pools of kaiju blue. doyeon steps around them and tries not to throw up as she searches for word of her father.
after a week, the ppdc release the names of dead officers. her father’s is on the list. he died helping civilians into a shelter. a heroic end, the kind he would’ve hoped for, but doyeon finds no comfort in that. there’s no body to bury, no ashes to scatter for him, but she kneels in the buenakai church (one of the only places standing) and prays through her tears for him anyway. her mother doesn’t weep at all. “your father was a sinner,” she says eventually. doyeon sees nothing but contempt and religious fervor in her eyes.
she beds down on the church floor at night, fists clenched, trying not to cry for her father and everything they’ve lost.
-
a few months after the attack on busan, her mother uproots them to the bone slums in hwaseong. the buenakai are building a church in the remains of the kaiju fallen there; they are just a few among the masses of pilgrims flocking to the new holy site. “i don’t want to go,” doyeon protests. she can’t think of any place she’d want to go less, but her mother remains steadfast in her decision. doyeon thinks about running away, leaving her mother and this stupid cult behind, but the truth is, she has nowhere else to go and no one to take care of her.
so she joins the exodus, pretending to be one of them, the well memorized songs and prayers spilling from her lips like acid. once they arrive, her mother is at the mercy of the church–they’re kind, in a way. they clothe, feed, and house displaced believers like them. she spends her days in the literal belly of the beast, trying her best to avoid the daily meditations and lessons the buenakai attempt to force onto her, but she can only run so far in this skeletal compound.
it’s easy to fall into complacency here. at night she recites the names of jaegers her father taught her, follows any news of the ppdc she can get her hands on, keeps safe the dirtied and torn memorabilia she scavenged from the remains of her house, digging through the rubble until her hands bled just for something to turn to for comfort. but it gets harder and harder to believe in the things she used to before—outside, jaegers are falling, pilots are dying, kaijus are getting bigger, bolder, more powerful–
the old fears return along with the nightmares: this looks like the end of the world. she begins believing, a little bit, in the god-like qualities of the kaiju. maybe they can’t be defeated, not permanently. maybe people are stupid to even try. maybe they should just accept that humans can’t best gods and prepare for the end times. maybe everything her father told her was wrong: they’re not strong. the kaiju are always, always stronger.
-
what is the difference between a god and a monster?
you worship a god. you fear a monster.
at times it becomes the same thing. you worship what you fear because you can’t do anything else.
-
this is not her.
-
operation pitfall is a success, but for the people around her, it’s a crushing defeat. still, doyeon sees less despair than she expects to. the believers think this is not the end, that the kaiju will return eventually. “you can’t chain a god forever,” one nun says during morning prayer.
she agrees–the kaiju will return. doyeon has no illusions about how powerful they are. something swells in her chest when she thinks about them. fear, trepidation, awe, and hate coiled underneath all that, burning hot enough to raze the entire church to the ground. but what pitfall taught her is that they’re not helpless. what the operation accomplished is nothing short of a miracle, and she’s reminded of her father and his unwavering beliefs in the capacity of humans to fight. she’s ashamed of having forgotten that.
it’s like… a numbness receding from her limbs, a cloudiness clearing up from her eyes. she can’t stay here longer, wrapped up in prayers and offerings and praises of the kaiju. not when they could be coming back, and not when the world needs to prepare to face them again. because they have been defeated and they can be defeated again, and–doyeon just doesn’t want any part of this cult anymore.
she packs her bags the day she turns eighteen and flees the bone slums, leaving only a note for her mother behind. i don’t believe like you do, she writes. i never have and i never will. i don’t want to submit to these gods, mom. i want to fight. they are lofty words from someone who’s never had to survive in the harsh world on their own, but doyeon learns as she goes.
it’s bitter, and survival skills don’t come easy. but she regains parts of herself she thought she lost in the process, and at night she pulls out the tattered remains of her old jaeger memorabilia and thinks her father was right: the ppdc are protectors and she wants—
to be like them.
WE SHALL STAND STRONG LIKE TITANS
after few weeks of wandering following her eighteenth birthday, doyeon came into contact with a ppdc recruiter in january of 2017 in seoul. initially, her attempts to apply for the jaeger academy training program were rejected, but she persisted until she was eventually accepted into the academy. she suspects her father’s years of service and association with the ppdc as a strike trooper probably helped her case in the end. regardless, she was excited to begin training, though she remained a little self-conscious of the fact that she had no outstanding skills to bring into the program, just her own determination and resolve.
her fascination with the ppdc began when she was young, fostered by her father’s stories about the heroics of rangers, strike troopers, and so on. she idolized them, thought of them as all-powerful protectors, and even when she was losing faith in the ppdc’s capabilities, she still thought the organization was vital. though the kaiju have been defeated, doyeon still believes that it’s a matter of time before they return and doesn’t want to be complacent in that case. while she’s not consciously aware of it, part of her decision to join the ppdc is also motivated by a desire to confront her fear of the kaiju should they return; she doesn’t want to cower in front of them but feel like she has some power to fight back. she also wants to honor her father’s memory by being involved with the ppdc!
truthfully, she’s a bit ashamed of her lack of knowledge compared to the other cadets. like mentioned earlier, she doesn’t bring any special skills or outstanding abilities into the program with her, and when she sees fellow cadets who’re already building weapons or working with tissue samples or were recruited into the academy by staff, she feels inadequate. however, that drives her to work as hard as she possibly can. she’s a grinder; doyeon spends most of her time either hitting the books for theory and basic knowledge or conditioning her physical body. distractions are minimal for her. motivated by the fear of being left far behind all her classmates, she pushes herself to extremes just to keep apace with them.
her skills definitely lie more in the physical sphere; theory is not really her forte, though she’s trying! she doesn’t have much specialized knowledge about engineering and tends to avoid k-science as much as possible, but she likes learning about tactics and studying past engagements between jaeger and kaiju. she has some troubles sleeping and tends to get stressed easily, and exercise and honing her physical skills helps keep her grounded and occupied.
while not the most social person, doyeon has slowly begun to open up to her fellow cadets. to say she has some trust issues is an understatement; for the most part, she remains private about her background and personal life, but she’s recently started to bond with other people and relax a bit more, finding a life outside purely studying. she’s also trying to figure out what she wants to specialize in when the time comes and feels a bit overwhelmed by all the options. one thing is for sure: she doesn’t want to be a ranger since she doesn’t think she’ll be able to let anybody in her head.
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RE: CADET #970103 • • • KIM , SEOLHYUN
ASSIGNED TO STRIKE , EVALUATION SCORE OF < 180 > POINTS
THOUGH WE ARE IN THE EYE OF THE STORM
she’s one of the lucky ones, seolhyun comes to find out.
there’s really nothing special about her childhood; born to a loving mother and father as the only child after a string of complications, and because of that she’s showered in love and affection through out her life. she’s given a rather mundane childhood – nothing out of the ordinary or rather special, even when the kaiju rear their ugly heads and forever change the course of history. their scary, terrifying, and it’s even worse whenever her parents can’t come up with an excuse to quell her fears ( because really, what can you say when you told your child that monsters weren’t real of of their life, and then something like this show up? how do you explain it? ), but her mother tells her that everything is going to be okay and seolhyun believes it. her mother is never wrong.
and it shows whenever the kaiju’s continue to attack with increasing frequency, but when young seolhyun steps outside everything remains untouched. it’s such a vast difference from the sheer terror that she sees on the screen and what’s happening right outside of her house ( nothing, aside from the looming uncertainty within the air ) that it becomes that image specifically which calms her down. seolhyun grows up, life goes on in seoul city, and the kaiju attacks become nothing more than a way of life to her – the same as war, famine, natural disasters.
( though what she does pay attention to are the jaegers – they’re like robots that walked straight out of cartoons and anime to defeat the evils of the universe, and seolhyun is amazed. she’s fourteen whenever she tells her mother that she wants to pilot one of them one day; there’s a loving pat upon her head and he tells her that she can do anything she puts her mind to. )
seolhyun finds herself delving into the gaming world as she reaches her teenage years, dedicating ample amounts of time behind screens in order to hone her skills, finding herself climbing up competitive ranks – nationally, even internationally – in order to be the best. it’s a thrill, but the biggest one appears in 2016 with the release of a new online multiplayer that revolutionized gaming as she knew it.
it’s based off of the kaiju war, a game in which you pilot a jaeger with your team and seolhyun finds that it’s everything that she wants in a game; so do many others around the world. it rises to become one of the most popular games internationally, but not without stark, loud criticism – accused of glamorizing the kaiju war when it wasn’t that long ago that they were still around, the cries of denunciation mainly from those who had been affected by the kaiju – but it still went on. she finds herself enthralled within the universe, going so far as to make her way up the ranks, until she made it into the e-sports league – one of the heads of the team signing her during it’s creation
with her face and her skills shown around the world, seolhyun was bound to get attention – her looks and gender moreso than her skills, but there were several times where fans – as well as some younger members of the ppdc – would reach out to her and tell her to join the academy, as her tactical skills and quick reflexes would be an asset to to the crew, in case the game becomes reality once more. she declines every time with a polite smile – it was a childhood dream, yes, but it doesn’t seem like her reality now.
WE SHALL STAND STRONG LIKE TITANS
though when the league isn’t in session and seolhyun finds herself in university, studying communications or something of the sort, she’s restless. reading these books and listening about how to convince the public that your company is great isn’t really… doing it for her. it’s not exciting, it’s not interesting, and the occasional message about the ppdc doesn’t stop. when winter break comes along after her first year of university, she analyzes her life and what she wants to do – and slaving over a desk doing a usual nine to five isn’t what she sees her future as.
there’s a lot of shocked emojis whenever she reveals on her personal gaming stream that she’s enrolling within the jaeger academy, but they’re much more accepting than her parents were about it ( mainly out of fear, they worked so hard to bring her into the world and were terrified of losing her so quickly, so young ). but a week or two inside the academy during the spring of 2017, seolhyun couldn’t stop beaming from ear to ear – it just felt so right to be here, to learn about things she was actually interested in and to actually be productive with her gaming experience.
and it’s that experience that has allowed her to soar through the program. it hasn’t been easy, of course not. there was a lot more information that came with being a pilot, a lot more than the game had seemed to simplify for the masses ( or maybe they just didn’t know as well ), but it was her ability to work with others and her quick thinking underneath pressure that received accolades from her professors and a rise within the ranks – old habits seem to die hard for her. it hasn’t been without frustration, tears, and lots of hard work; but seolhyun knows that at the end of the day, it’s worth it.
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RE: OFFICER #950329 • • • BAE , JOOHYUN
ASSIGNED TO J-TECH , EVALUATION SCORE OF < 1300 > POINTS
THOUGH WE ARE IN THE EYE OF THE STORM
she’s born out of a fiery romance, of opposing personalities converging to create something beautiful. as she’s cradled in the arms of her mother, the young couple dreams of her future, and all the things she can be, what kind of things she will accomplish. her future is bright, and so are they.
she’s a meek child, quiet when alone, shy upon being approached. her voice is as small as her frame, but her mind is vast, demonstrating great intellect even at a young age. an aptitude for numbers, a desire to learn—in her tiny hands, she demonstrates enormous potential. in order to build upon that potential, she’s enrolled in a private school for gifted minds, excelling even in such an extraordinary environment. it’s only a matter of time, her parents think, before she changes the world.
when the kaijus emerge from the depths of the pacific ocean, they learn her heart is as big as her mind when her small voice asks big questions, of why cruel things happen to good people, of what she can do to help. they don’t have all the answers, so she comes up with some of her own. by the time she’s twelve years old, she’s developed the resolve to join the ppdc and help build and create the world’s saviors.
high school is a breeze, perhaps too easy for joohyun, who graduates at the tender age of sixteen. despite her youth, she moves to daejeon on her own and attends kaist. for two years, she studies diligently, equally dividing her time between school subjects and jaeger study. her rooms becomes a mess with papers strewn everywhere, designs and re-designs on her desk, the trash, the floor. anyone who dares disturb her learns that her passion overpowers a meek personality, and she soon becomes a hurricane, unstoppable.
from university, too, she graduates early in three years’ time, and is plucked from the rows of graduates with her cap and gown still on, straight into the jaeger academy.
WE SHALL STAND STRONG LIKE TITANS
university was the steps upward, and the jaeger academy is her stage to shine. she thrives in this environment, surrounded by like-minded people, thrown into the pools everything the jaeger academy has to offer. she swims in all the knowledge, absorbs it like a sponge in water, applies it to real life situations as if the world is just a simulation and she is the programmer. it’s at the jaeger academy that she reaches her peak self, finding the place where she truly belongs, her confidence at an all time high.
she owes it to a certain ppdc staff member, the creator of her favorite jaeger, the engineer of hyperion. she takes after him, studies him as much as she studies the mechanized weapons they try to improve.
when she graduates, she intends to continue on under his tutelage, but finds that his retirement has come abruptly without a reason or a clue as to why. though she fill his empty spot as hyperion’s primary engineer, she can’t help but try and solve the mystery he left behind while doing her best to continue his legacy.
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RE: OFFICER #910122 • • • PARK , HYEMIN
ASSIGNED TO STRIKE , EVALUATION SCORE OF < 1460 > POINTS
THOUGH WE ARE IN THE EYE OF THE STORM
she greets death for the first time on sunday morning, no rain, no gray, but just a feeling of something off. small feet and small steps take her to the first floor of her home, magneted to the cream colored canine she’s called her best friend since birth. “mama, what’s wrong with him?” innocent confusion strings itself into words and a tilt of her head. so it is that that night mama kim and papa kim sit down their two sweet angels and introduce the concept of mortality. hyemin cries as expected, comforted only by the soft hold of her mother and kisses from her father. she is still but a stranger to the darkness of death.
death holds an extended stay the second time it enters her life. it does not come sudden and brand new, blindsiding her as it had when it had first made its introductions. it knocks at the door in the form of a cough, persistent and lingering, not too intrusive but making its presence known. days go on before they turn to weeks that escalate into months. when her father finally relents to visit the doctors, they diagnose him with a message that it’s too late. death is not sweet this time, claiming in the middle of sleep. instead it chips and picks away at the man she knows as home, a god, her father. she learns that there is nothing beautiful and ethereal in this claim. death takes what it desires and leaves her only with a new found resolution, to serves as comrades to those who served her father in the hospital.
death finds itself funny to continue taking the men in her life, imposing itself as the curse upon park hyemin’s life. she is in her evening lecture class when the news breaks. kaiju have been as normalized as hurricanes and earthquakes in the past seven years. yet, one always prays that they never have to meet such calamity in the eye. she finds it funny how she had joined the saving lives profession, only to be unable to help the one most important to her yet again. she finds it sad that this is all that all the honors and accolades can do for her. no amount of talent, passion, dedication, or smarts can bring back a dead man. the seas have given them the fantasies of monsters and calamity but heaven is not kind enough to provide the fantasy of time travel or invincibility.
WE SHALL STAND STRONG LIKE TITANS
the glass can be viewed half empty or half full. so it is that when the world meets its reckoning, some rise where others fall. it isn’t a purposeful pursuit but still opportunity presents itself to her. she has neither the credential nor the license to join their ranks. yet, what she offers instead is the drive, the motivation, the history of good record and intellect to be properly recommended by her own professors. the world is falling apart and it needs medics like her to patch up the broken bits.
so she enters at the age of twenty, finishing the last of her education under the guidance of the seniors who have joined before her. she serves her purpose not amid white walls and white sheets but instead for those who have faced kaiju blue and pour their own red into the earth below.
she is neither friend nor foe to death these days. instead she greets when appropriate, asks it to wait when she can. the years of service in between have allowed her to walk the thin line between life and death and it is an interesting place to be. she finds purpose in her career, happy to step into the shoes of those she had admired on all her sunday visits to the hospital when father laid ill. they did their part as she does hers, from assistant to well recognized medic within the ppdc.
she hopes she can offer them enough. salvation is hard these days but it can always be found in more ways than one.
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RE: CADET #930703 • • • LEE , TAEMIN
ASSIGNED TO STRIKE , EVALUATION SCORE OF < 470 > POINTS
THOUGH WE ARE IN THE EYE OF THE STORM
his parents were born into war - his mother and father were considered as their talented air pilots for years after their recruitment into the military, with his mother joining much later than his father. they had always welcomed the idea or suspicion that the world was much bigger than they could imagine which was when both their ambitions had started in the first place. that could explain the story of how both of his parents had met. when they had decided to settle down after being released and was granted a much needed, extensive vacation, lee taemin was finally born. the child was lanky, kind of skinnier than they would have expected but they both loved him completely.
for three years they raised him before another call comes in regarding work and they were forced to part with their son again, leaving him with his trusted aunt. but taemin acted like a good son because he was asked to by his father, waited for his parents to arrive back as always and they would, greeting his parents in relief upon their arrival back.
taemin turned nine years old in july of 2003 and even during that time, he still patiently tried to wait for his parents’ arrival for months after they were unexpectedly called out to america for a meeting, at least that was what his parents told him. it was difficult being an air pilot, forcing his parents to leave and be gone for an extensive amount of time, so he sort of understood, which explained why nine year old taemin did not think much of it during that time, so he waited like he always did. lee taemin was a prodigy at his age as it seemed as though his mind worked much faster than the rest of the kids in his neighborhood.
the kid who was simply intrigued by growing technology, the kid who attempted to wire a drone when he was ten or being able to build a computer from scratch with the parts he had while was constantly so fixated on his computer setup when he was eleven. sure his mind was big but he was also a lazy kid. his hair was always kind of a mess, always managing to nearly show up late to school every day though he depended on how late he’d sleep the day before. lazy but surprisingly limble even.
two years later, 2005, there wasn’t many ways for taemin to have known what the world was up to and what sort of changes were happening until his father got involved in it. as for his mother, getting the chance to join the ppdc sounded too extreme for her so she forced herself to decline their offer and keep her job as a regular military air pilot. taemin was curious after his father told him about the new job offer that he received but little did he know that his father was apart of something much bigger than what he had expected.
“i hope you continue to behave.”
“yeah, whatever.”
father leaves again.
the rest of middle school was rough, being seemingly smaller than the average boys in his class which made it easier to be pushed around which he did not enjoy. he became mouthy and troublesome for his classmates and that was when teachers would inevitably tell him that he was “too smart to make stupid decisions like that”. but then high school came in which his education turned around for the better (kind of) while his social life remained poor due to the rough companions he kept around him. taemin was much more open to studying engineering in the future and knowing his family background, his parents were formerly majors of the same subject before their military careers. taemin has always been a prodigy, with more ambition than he lets on despite his disinterest in choosing a proper career.
sometime during 2011, taemin would occasionally come across news articles about the kaiju incidents in the world’s major cities and countries on the internet, the place where you can literally find info on anything, which automatically caught his interest but unfortunately the information he found on the kaiju was clearly all public knowledge already.
in the end, high school failed to really stimulate him, being generally detached to everything that was not related to the work of computers and hands on technology despite his impressively high grades throughout four years. he did not impress enough interest in many occupations until he found out about the ppdc. the term ‘jaegers’ was intriguing all in itself and the idea of mobile weapons practically being used as mech suits for war was exciting to him upon discovery.
WE SHALL STAND STRONG LIKE TITANS
it was before graduation that he had received recruitment from the jaegar academy staff due to the connection they had with his father, who had been apart of the ppdc and the jumphawk squadron since 2005 so in conclusion, his father was a tremendous help to the ppdc. taemin wasn’t dumb enough to decline the offer though and so three months after graduation, he became apart of the jaegar academy knowing that upon his recruitment, having work harder than anyone else who got in the same way and yet he wasn’t going to let anyone bypass him at all. they recognized his strong determination after that point.
going from class d to class c was easy while ranking from class c was more difficult than the last trial he was given. taemin realizes that there was so many things that he did not know himself when it comes to the job he desired but guess that was bound to be inevitable. even so, he was familiar with basic functions of technology due to his previous knowledge he learned on his own and through technical classes in high school which made it easier to learn the basic functions of a jaegar in the process while familiarizing himself with which parts of the jaegar works and what works well in the middle of battle. the jaegar academy was just a replacement for college, he thought so attending a university wasn’t in the cards for him. studying tactics wasn’t difficult but his problem with working together with others was bigger.
still being quite lanky and a little skinny, the physical training was more difficult than the rest of the tasks that he was trained for and of course taemin had to deal with the criticism even with his father occasionally breathing down his neck about it once and awhile. that was what came with training as he’d suspect. although taemin was much more proficient in combat with weapons at the start due to fast familiarity in handling them than with hand to hand combat which was a weakness of his that he felt he needed to work on in the years to come. agility? that part was nothing. that was what the constant work out was for and lee taemin was known for focusing his time and energy on one specific task until he’s able to perfect it, which explained the work he puts onto transforming his body (but not too much, he liked his body). it didn’t take long for him to get used to the pain he endures during his rough training while getting used to sense how long his body is able to withstand.
throughout nearly seven years of training, he’s slowly further learning to master the training of his martial arts and fencing skills to maintain his body which was not too big and not too small, average for a future ranger, slowly rising up the ranks. he took interest in the newly graduated rangers breaking into their jaegars knowing it’ll be him soon, or he’s hoping it’ll be but it was all thanks to his friends who did not let him slack one bit and was always pushing him to deal with other cadets and let them help him rather than letting taemin do things on his own. trainers still scold him whenever taemin has trouble with his fellow cadets, still having difficulty getting along with everyone due to being a little hardheaded. but in order to pilot a jaegar, taemin had to do what he was asked because he couldn’t do it alone, as it would be utterly impossible to do so.
taemin never really considered connecting with anyone emotionally before, especially not after his father was shot down from an impossible battle.
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