me providing diluc with the best artifacts, (second) best claymore (noelle gets the best one), and best spot in my teapot the second he came home: diloo… deeloo…….

he is so babygirl to me but like his own category of babygirl. like if i had to put genshin men into groups i would have babygirls and then babygirls who are also diluc- teddy anon

based teddy arc ngl

you are entirely right and so real on all of this. you and i should show each other our teapots sometime. don’t have diluc in there cause he’s friendship 10 but i still think it looks nice enough (and lord knows i agonized over it for days)

i admit my diluc doesn’t have the best artifacts but in my defense nobody does except heizou and that’s outta sheer luck. artifact domains hate me istg it’s so irritating-

also. real. babygirls and then babygirls (diluc) is the most based game i’ve seen this week

little info dump of lizzie’s la muses

ADELAIDE LINDHOLM  :   they still need a last name but . whatever. i was gonna make her like really boring n a lil mean but. i changed me mind. she’s still uninterested in fame but im pulling her out of management she did it for like 3 years and then realized it brought her nothing but stress and pain so she quit and is doing temp work for the time being she’s trying to figure some stuff of her own out but deflects it onto still trying to boss around her siblings all the time. this sounded more interesting in my head. know it all, bossy, putting on a front of being in control of her miserable life

plots for her include  :  former clients she completely abandoned when she snapped, im working on more but sometimes... being a big sister is a full time job am i right girls

ALISON COLLINS  :  a woman at a crossroads . wants to follow her big artistic ambition of [redacted] but it just hasnt worked out for her yet so she’s teaching elementary art classes at a Hippie School to pay the bills til something comes her way , but its hard to be the edgy artist type when u got the school breathing down ur back and checking 2 make sure ur on the straight and narrow.

plots for her include  :  another big sister im ltrying to think of plots for but . sometimes things arent easy you know. she could have art circle friends who make fun of her for Selling Out and making pipe cleaner crafts for a living now

BRUNO VARGAS  :   i’m copy pasting the fc meme. he bought a “capitalism is unsustainable” sticker off of amazon. prime example of that “little confused but he’s got the spirit” meme. he threw himself into the social activism scene after he dropped out of college and ran away to the city to really make something of himself. he really wants to do good things for good reasons his heart is in the right place he’s just a dumbass. grew up in a traditional catholic military family but hasn’t had contact w them for a minute. lives in the fold because he thinks its cool 2 force people 2 hang out with him. works for an indie underground news publication.

plots for him include  :  yeah  maybe i am still stuck on the boyfriend/girlfriend plot. im not married to it being bf n gf if it just works 2 be 2 gfs or 2 bfs anyways. plot would be that one partner bruno has had longer and has openly been with for a minute now. second partner would be more recent and bc of that less of the whole official We’re Together :) kind of thing. both partners would know he’s seeing other people, but he hasnt gone out of his way to specifically out either of them, p2 just knows about p1 bc they were openly w bruno whereas they arent yet. if that makes literally any sense

COLE EDWARDS  :  bit of a weirdo. she does something behind the scenes i was thinking like set design because thats something that weirdly really interests me. anyways shes a doormat but in a different way than molly could be read that way she really just likes to be involved in things and help people. ~quirky~ but one day , she will snap. u can tell when u see her at craft night and she gets so much hot glue on her hand but doesnt even react. its like she cant feel it... feel better cole...

plots for her   :  cole could work for laguna beach or as the mystery novak stepsib im not married to her being on the show or not yet. i figured she could be fun there because she would be a light addition to all these Reality Tv Bastards u know. her bg and plots will fit whichever subplot i use her for so . tba

HOLLIS MESSINA   :   kill him NOW .   hollis is a bad man. not to godmod michele but in my head their parents are also like weird arsty types not necessarily famous but always very into the arts all thru their childhood. they grew up eating a lot of kale and maybe thats why hollis is the way he is. he’s vapid and very insecure because he wants so bad to be cool and funny and talented and suffers from major impostor syndrome which contributes to his online shopping addiction. take a nap hollis...

plots for him  :  we know im always looking for a plot where my musician writes a song about how crusty their ex is and their ex doesn’t appreciate it, or in general just maybe someone who got past the Phony Fakeass Cool Hollis act but then he decided to be very mean to them because soemtimes it hurts to let people in

JAMES ZAMORA   :  instagram model and youtuber. new media thot. she makes beauty, fashion, lifestyle, and travel related content. her entire brand is being A Sexy Little Trollop for people to envy. came from humble beginnings believe it or not, but she will never tell anyone that. as far as they need to be concerned shes been toddling around in heels since day one. lives in the fold because it makes for quirky content but once a month she threatens to get the hell out of here.. no one knows why she stays..

plots for her  :  frankly between the Novak Boyz and the mean girl squad im happy w her plots for now but shes always around to *cheryl blossom voice* create a little chaos if needed...

MOLLY SEKULIC   :   for the first week he lived at the fold noah thought she was a ghost :0  jadede film school student who thought she would get to do real documentary work at a place like b*zzfeed news but got put on projects shes not as passionate about 2 put it kindly. constantly planning her escape from the fold and worth it and all of that but 2 depressed to actually put any of it into play so she just sticks around and hopes one day she’s tapped for something with Substance

plots for her  :  she just doesnt get out much. shes got her Horrible sons (alec and [redacted]) and the girlies she hangs out with at the fold so shes not a completely friendless loser. with muses also working in film i think it could be fun to have a plot where they went to school together/worked on a project earlyo n together but now shes doing this and is embarrassed to talk to them abt it not that its even that real of a plot..

NOAH FITZGERALD  :  i wrote an intro for him in fold and im just gonna link it here. tldr hes very shy,, be gentle,, he wants to be liked and validated which is a common theme for me becuase yeah maybe in my core i dont believe anyone pursuing art does it for any reason but validation i sure know i do 

plots for him  :   he’s got a little going on but other fun stuff could be musicians he jams with that could catch onto his and bradys Scam, maybe some other dorks to commiserate with ive obvisosuly not got as many ideas as i let on huh,

WYATT SONG   :   gay writer bitch. came from money so he’s just casually pursuing writing full time minus the time he spends on the show (bit less than everyone else just because watching him sit in his home office and do nothing for hours just isnt interesting) but i kinda like the idea of him being a Villain within the show like idk what dynamics we were wanting to set up but i feel ike since he’s more reclusive than the others and when he is around hes Annoying he could be someone the show kinda frames as Not Likable which mostly doesnt bother him but . stings a little

plots   :  someone whos really nice 2 him off cam but plays to that villain thing on cam, which could work for a few muses on different levels like a friend whos just flighty to someone he’s ~ secretly dating ~ bc it would mess up the current plot of the show if they were fucking just yet

im back

hi just thought id pop in with a status update! maybe i’ll break this down into categories. feel like im doing an email update (ew!) but this rly is probs the best way to structure this post...

work / school (?)

work has been....aite. idk what to say. idk if i have unrealistic expectations of what work is supposed to be, but the idealist in me thinks its wrong to not even try and find something that seems meaningful / is deeply fulfilling. i think im mature enough to get that work isnt supposed to be fun / exciting every single day but bro this daily grind / sense of dread / utter disinterest / feeling of futility / frustration / disenchantment surely isnt the correct state of affairs.....at least let me try and find something that is a better fit, thats more stimulating, that feels more NATURAL to me? i just dont think im cut out to be a lawyer. sure i sometimes like arguing and making my point and i like that everyone i work with is smart and interesting and generally kind and reasonable and i like the prestige of the job and feeling like ppl respect me and i like the decent pay and the humane hours but.....i feel unmotivated to be a good lawyer. i think i find it difficult / disingenuous to always 100% get behind my client and advocate for their best interests. i tend to see things from a zoomed out perspective, like WHY are we fighting, WHY cant we just settle, WHY are the claimants pursuing this absolutely crap and unmeritorious claim and WHY do we have to defend it when its stupid and bound to fail (cos access2justice i guess but still, WHY), WHY cant we just hash things out in a meeting instead of sending emails here and there and wasting time, WHY do we have to answer stupid questions, WHY WHY WHY

and i think public policy is sort of an answer to that....i think theres more questioning of why we do things and why a policy will or will not work, in a macro sense - what is good for society at large. whereas in law (at least in litigation) its how can we just move this case forward and help the client, which is often not the most productive thing to do in a macro sense - very much a zero sum game. i get that shitty / unmeritorious claims still need to be defended against and someone has to do it and I GET IT but i just dont think i want to be that person defending these claims...or bringing them for that matter.....ultimately i cant fully / sincerely separate the overarching sense of futility from the duty to do a good job.

sigh. well at least ive kind of figured out this isnt for me. which is scary cos being a lawyer in this firm is pretty much a career for life - truly an iron rice bowl, i could probably make partner in maybe 4 or 5 years and live a comfortable upper middle class life...but i cant bring myself to do that. i cant bring myself to not give myself a shot at doing something i actually find interesting, stimulating and that i care about deeply. call me crazy! we’ll see where this brings me in 5 years’ time....:) 

anyway most ppl at work (at least in my team) know that im most likely gonna leave soon. i rly only told 2 ppl (my boss cos he had to sign off on my testimonial and G cos she was quitting anyway)...but somehow ppl found out one way or another. i dont rly mind and ppl have been taking it pretty well and have been kind and encouraging (i guess why would they not take it well, im hardly indispensable) but i get a bit antsy thinking - what if i dont get in...then what? do i just put my head down and continue here (BUT IM SO SAD) or do i just quit without any prospects and try to find a policy-ish job??

idk. will have faith that God will put me where I need to be. he is in control of it all and I BELIEVE THIS !!! I am just a bit scared that his plan is different from what i  think i want....but this is just my human instinct and i know in my head that there is no reason to be scared cos his plan is always the better one. head knowledge just needs to translate to heart understanding and real trust / faith.

ermmm relationships...???

i started using...cmb...idk why i find this so cringey. i guess about a year ago i couldnt imagine doing this and i kept thinking EW what if ppl i know see me and they think im a desperate saddo who cant find a bf irl and has to resort to an app EW shes so lame and ugly and gross. and i realised that is so stupid no one actually thinks that way and its very backward and dumb and insecure of me to be thinking that. and anyway as i get older i rly dont quite give a shit what ppl think of me (at least i tell myself that....)

i suppose i was also inspired by csm who has been quite actively using apps and meeting ppl and taking real..strides..(LOL) in her dating life. i used to tell myself hey God will provide u with a mans if he wants u to be with a mans. but also God can use an app to do that...and if i dont step out in faith that he will do something and i dont take any action at all, how is God gonna work?? should i sit at home and expect a man to fall into my lap??

for some ppl it has been way easier, e.g. my parents meeting in uni and falling i love. i always wanted that - the organic relationship, the meet-cute, the friends to lovers thing. (i guess i tried that last one before and it didnt work...) but i think theres no point in romanticising relationships anymore. thats a very modern thing to do and its not necessarily a good thing? like who’s to say a relationship that had organic beginnings is intrinsically better than one that started from an app?

anyway i havent had much luck haha i think its hard to find genuine GCBs (or maybe theyre just not attracted to me....) although recently ive been talking to this one guy B for a week or two and its been...ok i guess. hes rly nice and seemed cool at first - we talked about travelling and hamilton and the office, which was a good start. he is thoughtful and kind and doesnt seem to be put off by my very slow replies (he replies so fast......its stressful a bit) and he does the whole good morning text thing (which i frankly find a bit bizarre, we barely know each other..?? and ive never even met him irl.. but its sweet i guess :))

but DUDE his english seems to be not great - at least thats the impression i get from texting him. which is an issue for me. i dont want it to be BUT IT IS...first red flag was when he said some weird thing about not wanting to wear a mask at work (not a literal mask - like he didnt know if he could be his ‘true self’) and the wording was very strange. then he said “the weekends are almost here” ?? the weekend is not a plural though? then he used the wrong tense a few times and his apostrophe usage was wrong (”Gods’ love” - bro there is one God). he also uses way too many commas which irks me.

i mean i get that text is supposed to be an informal medium - come on look at this post, there r hardly any capital letters and plenty of short forms and hardly any apostrophes but u see its CONSISTENT and its obviously cos of laziness / convenience - but i think his problem is a bit different...u can sort of tell if someone doesnt have a 100% strong grasp of english. those r basic grammar mistakes man...i get that i sound petty and stupid and this isnt a huge deal but i feel like im settling by even talking to him cos this is not something i wld normally tolerate but hey maybe im getting desperate with age :(:(:( urgh 

on the other hand maybe i just need to be more generous with ppl and l have an irrationally high standard for english cos i am a lawyer and my friends all speak well / text well?? maybe im just being too nitpicky?? honestly hes very nice  and communicative and straightforward and seems mature and very God-fearing and idk why hes still talking to me cos ive been a bit cold and slow to respond. hes very patient which i dont rly deserve.....i myself have a million flaws that are probably way worse and egregious (ahem PRIDE...ahem ego....ie the source of this dilemma in the first place...) so maybe i should just close one eye abt the bad grammar.

i also realised how fked up i am - confirmed my suspicion that i am naturally attracted to emotionally unavailable ppl / ppl that just seem distant / out of reach (thats my avoidant attachment style right there). i think there was one day he didnt text me at all and omg...i couldnt stop thinking what i did wrong...like did i piss him off by being too cold for too long...did he get scared off cos i said i wanted to do a masters (idk this seemed like an irrational leap but i was being irrational)..then i started being nicer to him and replied more promptly hahaha turns out he was just rly bz at work that day. omg this pattern is real i think i did this with xj also - was eager to speak when he was in japan but after meeting irll i was just over it... (i am drawn to distance like a moth to a flame and i am repelled by availability like....a fire by a fire extinguisher (??)). yucks i rly hate myself sometimes but yknow what at least im self aware and im trying to fix this...kind of.. gonna hash this avoidant thing out with my therapist at the next sesh.

on the topic of xj i got a bit nostalgic and wondered why we stopped speaking (surprise surprise it was my fault, didnt reply then felt it had been left to long to pick it up again...) went back to look at our texts and aw we rly got along so well, i do miss him as a friend and im sorry about how poorly i treated him especially in dec 2018 / jan 2019 sigh.....i was a real bitch....

anyway im just gonna see how things go with B... if he asks me out i prob will go... just to give it a shot. update if / when that happens!

EDIT - he asked me out lol we shall see how it goes. 

answer all of them

answers under the cut! only doing this cause im that bored

200: My crush’s name is: no one 199: I was born in: 1996198: I am really: bored197: My cellphone company is: wtf who cares?? 196: My eye color is: green/blue 195: My shoe size is: 6.5194: My ring size is: idk small 193: My height is: smol 192: I am allergic to: cats and all of nature in the spring and summer 191: My 1st car was: an hhr or as i liked to call it a poor mans hearse190: My 1st job was: an in home care taker aka i cleaned elderly peoples homes189: Last book you read: god i dont read188: My bed is: my best friend 187: My pet: is the loml 186: My best friend: she lives too far away tbh 185: My favorite shampoo is: i use old spice 2-in-1 like the basic bitch i am184: Xbox or ps3: ps3??? what year is it the switch is where its mfkin at 183: Piggy banks are: dope af 182: In my pockets: nothing cause im a broke bitch 181: On my calendar: nothing cause im a boring bitch 180: Marriage is: cool good on everyone who is married to their best friends 179: Spongebob can: new spongebob can die cause its garbage 178: My mom: is the best 177: The last three songs I bought were? who buys songs? 176: Last YouTube video watched: air crash investigations (dont ask) 175: How many cousins do you have? idk 174: Do you have any siblings? one sister 173: Are your parents divorced? nah 172: Are you taller than your mom? nah 171: Do you play an instrument? i used to play the violin and guitar but not anymore 170: What did you do yesterday? tried not to die [ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: idk maybe? 168: Luck: sure 167: Fate: yeah sure 166: Yourself: hahahahahahahahahahahahaha no 165: Aliens: fuck yeah 164: Heaven: ehhh no 163: Hell: no 162: God: not really 161: Horoscopes: lowkey160: Soul mates: every one has one 159: Ghosts: kind of 158: Gay Marriage: nah why would gays want to get married 157: War: war is p stupid 156: Orbs: wtf is an orb??155: Magic: no [ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: kisses 153: Drunk or High: drunk 152: Phone or Online: online 151: Red heads or Black haired: black 150: Blondes or Brunettes: brunettes 149: Hot or cold: cold 148: Summer or winter: winter 147: Autumn or Spring: autumn 146: Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla 145: Night or Day: night 144: Oranges or Apples: apples 143: Curly or Straight hair: curly 142: McDonalds or Burger King: mcdonalds 141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: this is dark chocolate erasure and i will not stand for it 140: Mac or PC: mac 139: Flip flops or high heals: neither both are garbage for the feet 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: im already sweet and poor sooooo137: Coke or Pepsi: where is my dr. pepper representation 136: Hillary or Obama: obama 135: Burried or cremated: cremated id like to go out in a burnin glory even if im already dead 134: Singing or Dancing: singing 133: Coach or Chanel: neither 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: who are you people 131: Small town or Big city: big city 130: Wal-Mart or Target: im a lesbian so target obviously 129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: neither 128: Manicure or Pedicure: pedicure only cause they message my feet and legs 127: East Coast or West Coast: west coast 126: Your Birthday or Christmas: xmas cause snow 125: Chocolate or Flowers: chocolate 124: Disney or Six Flags: disney 123: Yankees or Red Sox: neither who cares about baseball [ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: men bein garbage 121: George Bush: why? 120: Gay Marriage: hell yeah we got it 119: The presidential election: we might as well have elected a crackhead 118: Abortion: let women get them safely so they dont fucking die its that simple117: MySpace: jesus is it 2006 again 116: Reality TV: its trashy but ill watch it cause im trash 115: Parents: love your parents kids (unless they are abusive) 114: Back stabbers: are awful just like maybe dont stab people in the back literally and metaphorically 113: Ebay: ive literally never used ebay in my life 112: Facebook: its p garbage i barely ever use it 111: Work: capitalism has killed workers and quality work 110: My Neighbors: they are there 109: Gas Prices: i havent gotten gas in like 2 months so like idk 108: Designer Clothes: why are they all like so ugly??107: College: stressful and only vaguely worth something 106: Sports: fun to play but boring to watch. i only go to sporting events for the alcohol 105: My family: is v dope and i love them 104: The future: stressful and i hate thinking about it [ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: last night it was my dad 102: Last time you ate: last night lol 101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: probably back in december with my best friend 100: Cried in front of someone: oooof all the time 99: Went to a movie theater: like 2 wks ago 98: Took a vacation: january i went on a cruise 97: Swam in a pool: last summer i think 96: Changed a diaper: uhhh never…. 95: Got my nails done: god way back in high school when i thought i was straight 94: Went to a wedding: last friday! 93: Broke a bone: 3 wks ago haha 92: Got a peircing: i havent gotten a piercing since i was like 6 91: Broke the law: uhhh i plead the fifth 90: Texted: i texted my mom like 40 mins ago [ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: myself 88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my dog shes so cute 87: The last movie I saw: spiderman into the spiderverse 86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: a vacation to see my aunt in indiana 85: The thing im not looking forward to: going back to school 84: People call me: uhhh my name? 83: The most difficult thing to do is: rn? pretty much everything 82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: never 81: My zodiac sign is: im a leo 80: The first person i talked to today was: my mom 79: First time you had a crush: first time i remember was freshman yr of college 78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: my mom 77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: i dont remember 76: Right now I am talking to: nobody im a lonely bitch 75: What are you going to do when you grow up: hopefully something to do with neuropsychology 74: I have/will get a job: 73: Tomorrow: wtf does this even mean 72: Today: or this one 71: Next Summer: and this one 70: Next Weekend: and even this one 69: I have these pets: a golden retriever mix 68: The worst sound in the world: 67: The person that makes me cry the most is: hahaha myself 66: People that make you happy: my family and friends 65: Last time I cried: yesterday 64: My friends are: amazing wonderful people that i love 63: My computer is: my lifeline 62: My School: is small but good 61: My Car: is a lesbian wagon that looks like i live in it 60: I lose all respect for people who: cheat on their s/o 59: The movie I cried at was: i dont usually cry during movies 58: Your hair color is: confusing kind of blonde also kind of brown 57: TV shows you watch: she ra, killing eve, grey anatomy too many others to list 56: Favorite web site: youtube 55: Your dream vacation: to go to germany 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: idk maybe my post surgery foot pain 53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium rare the only way a steak should be eaten 52: My room is: always a disaster 51: My favorite celebrity is: taylor swift 50: Where would you like to be: idk 49: Do you want children: noooo 48: Ever been in love: yes i have 47: Who’s your best friend: we aint naming names on here 46: More guy friends or girl friends: girl friends45: One thing that makes you feel great is: playing with my dog 44: One person that you wish you could see right now: A43: Do you have a 5 year plan: god no i dont even have a 5 hour plan 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: nah 41: Have you pre-named your children: nope40: Last person I got mad at: myself39: I would like to move to: somewhere other than where i am now 38: I wish I was a professional: at being not depressed [ My Favorites ]37: Candy: bottle caps or ritter sports 36: Vehicle: subaru wrx hatchbacks with a wide body kit are b nice 35: President: who tf has a favorite president 34: State visited: oregon or washington 33: Cellphone provider: who has a fave cell provider???32: Athlete: none31: Actor: idk like chris pratt or something 30: Actress: rn jodie comer 29: Singer: hayley williams 28: Band: paramore 27: Clothing store: h&m 26: Grocery store: target 25: TV show: law and order svu 24: Movie: princess mononoke 23: Website: youtube 22: Animal: red panda 21: Theme park: disneyland 20: Holiday: halloween 19: Sport to watch: none they are all hella boring 18: Sport to play: softball 17: Magazine: none i dont read 16: Book: i dont read books cant concentrate for that long 15: Day of the week: idk saturday 14: Beach: ive been to a beach like 3 times and i barely remember them 13: Concert attended: paramore after laughter concert last summer 12: Thing to cook: cooking stresses me the fuck out so i dont have a favorite thing to cook 11: Food: pasta!! 10: Restaurant: uhhh i dont really have one 9: Radio station: its 2019 who listens to the radio 8: Yankee candle scent: i dont really use candles 7: Perfume: i dont wear perfume 6: Flower: peach roses probably 5: Color: red 4: Talk show host: i dont watch talk shows they are all boring 3: Comedian: john mulaney or iliza schlesinger 2: Dog breed: corgi 1: Did you answer all these truthfully? hahahahaha

Webcomic Whimsy: Tales of Midgard

Welcome to the Woohooligan Weekly Webcomic Whimsy! I've given a couple of interviews in the past, but this is my first experience with reviewing. If you have any suggestions for improvements, feel free to leave a note. If you're a webcomic author and would like a review, you can see my announcement and review rules here.

Title: Tales of Midgard: the Age of Magic

Writer: Attila Polyák • About

Illustrator: Erzsébet Schlett aka Lizbeth von Rabbit • About • Patreon

Site: TalesOfMidgard.com • Facebook

Genres: Action/Adventure, Fantasy, Medieval, Middle Ages, Victorian, Anacronism

Rating: PG, T for Teen - some language

Updates: Every Weekday (Mon-Fri) - (used to be full chapters in 3-week intervals)

Synopsis: (from TalesOfMidgard.com) - Tales of Midgard is a collection of fantasy stories, mostly comics, set in the world of Midgard, which is not the same as in Norse mythology, but if you are vigilant enough you’ll find a reference or two here and there. While all stories are set in the same world, the actual settings for each individual tale varies a lot. Depending on the time and age of a story, the settings of some might be more modern than others. The “main” storyline, titled The Age of Magic, will be about the adventures of a young knight named Anne White.

As the authors described, Tales of Midgard contains very little reference to Norse Myth (despite the title), and in the long-run it reminds me a lot less of mythology and more of some sessions of Dungeons and Dragons. I managed to read a little more than the first two out of nine chapters, and while magic is mentioned with frequency, it's rarely seen (that may change in later chapters). What seemed much more common than the appearance of magic however was the appearance of modern ideas and inventions; trains, newspapers, democracy, modern capitalism with beauracratic corporations. From what I can tell, there are even approximations of "cell phones" and "the Internet". The main charater, Anne, is a knight, except that the title would be a misnomer in our world, since she works for a corporation instead of a monarch and her first two jobs are both illegal "smash and grab" operations. In our world, her title would be "mercenary". As a side note, the term "freelancer" originates from an old military term for mercenaries, "free lance" (that of course you pay for, after all, it's "free"). Anne is also a mage, although the first two chapters only show her working any magic once and very briefly. If you replaced swords with firearms and "info boxes" with flash-drives, this would almost be a modern action story.

I had a really difficult time deciding on the first image to display here. I wanted it to be either the best page I could find or the page most representative of the story as a whole... but I couldn't seem to find either of those, so I opted to use the first page. The difficulty finding a single page to represent the series is that the individual pages vary so wildly. I'll find a page that includes representative dialogue, but the art shows backs of heads, and then I'll find a page with better art, but it's a splash page with little to no dialogue or narration and it tells you virtually nothing about the story.

The story opens with Anne and Erik planning their first job, stealing an "info box" from several guards who are carrying it through the city of Kessheim. These are the kinds of planning sessions I remember from a slew of tabletop roleplaying games over the years. In a game session, this is part of the fun of the game, although I'm not sure it adds much to the comic. In some of the scripts for Return of the Jedi, the film included some planning scenes, explaining how the heroes would get Lando Calrissian, Leia and the droids into position inside Jaba's Palace before the ultimate rescue of Solo. Lucas cut those scenes because in the long run it was felt that they eliminated a number of surprises that made the film more enjoyable.

This is only the eighth review I've written, and already "focus on your pacing" is becoming a frequent refrain from me. It seems like pacing the story is one of the things that challenges most webcomic authors. The first couple chapters of Tales of Midgard tends to vassilate between pages with a lot of text, and splash pages with little or no information. A lot of text on a page can be forgiven sometimes if a situation really calls for it (lord knows that's something I've struggled with), however this story has a lot of pages where the extra verbiage that's added isn't delivering any new information. Splash pages can be great when properly and sparingly used to punctuate dramatic reveals and action sequences, however, several of the splash pages in Tales of Midgard seem to be splash for splash sake (or in Latin, splish pro splash es gratia). The page above is the second page of content, opening the story with two pages of Anne and Erik discussing the plan for their first job. The second page doesn't reveal much about it, just that Erik wants more reconnaissance and that he suspects it will reveal a more challenging task ahead. And then the third page is a splash page, just for Anne to repeat that she's preparing for the job (she already said so), while striking a heroic pose.

Heroic!

I'm ribbing them a little here, but this isn't really a huge problem. I'm just pointing out that the above page could have been entirely left out and nobody would have noticed, and that the first two pages of planning could have been one page with a little more editing. The opening dialogue for example reads: "Seems like we still have about an hour. Let's revise our plan, and after that I'm off to prepare for plan B." If this were a script for a movie or a TV show that might be fine, but in a comic you have to remember that dialogue can take up a lot of realestate on the page. That line could have read: "We have about an hour to revise our plan before I prepare for plan B." And that's before you consider the elements that aren't necessary because they're mentioned elsehwere in the script. It really could have been "we have an hour to revise our plan." ... Or in retrospect it could have been dropped entirely, since the reader doesn't need to know how long they're planning, just that they are, which is apparent from the rest of the art and script on that page.

Also, paring the script down would help the artist, who inevitably has to spend more time working on the comic than a writer does. Liz had to fit in a splash page, plus five panels for a minimal portion of the story. If the script had been pared down to fit onto one page, that could have been two to three, maybe four panels of art. I'm sure that would have been easier for Liz.

It turns out Erik's suspicions were right, the job will be harder than they thought.

There are two more pages of planning (a total of six) before the job starts. The pacing on the first page of the job is better, although I think the art jumps the gun on exclamation points and burst lines (I can't remember the western term for that effect). There's not been any action yet, this is still the "suspense" portion, leading up to the action. I would have used just two panels - the first with Anne entering and the second seeing the guards carrying the box with "there they are," and a background. As I said before about the pacing, these aren't huge problems, just areas that could use some polish.

Even here I'm not convinced we're quite ready for the dramatic splash page yet, although it makes a lot more sense on this page where she snatches the box than it did during the planning phase.

Honestly, I think the three bumbling guards turning into the Three Stooges is kind of a nice touch.

If I were writing, I might have started the entire story on the last panel of that page, with the guards already chasing Anne. All that talk of running down streets, and how many guards there were, and "plan B" could easily have been part of the narration during the chase. In fact most of it is repeated in the chase narration anyway, making most of those planning pages redundant. Starting here would have gotten the reader into the thick of the action straight away (just like the opening scene of Star Wars IV: A New Hope) and probably done a better job of holding people's attention.

The first "magiknight" appears right away, you can see him behind the other three guards in the last panel of the previous page. Anne confirms that's what he is on the following page after he's overtaken the regular guards and is gaining on her. The second magiknight appears immediately after and oddly decides on a WWE wrestling move instead of the kind of thing you'd expect from someone in full-plate armor... or a spell (remember, he's also supposed to be a mage).

But the most shocking thing on that page was the democracy! SHOCKING! Remember, peasants, the King needs your vote! Again, I kid, although it is another part of the overall theme of this world being modern day with a veneer of medieval or renaissance themes. That's the kind of atmosphere that I've found a lot in D&D or other roleplaying games because the players are never historical scholars and I suspect even for them, it's hard to put yourself in the shoes of someone who lived even sixty years ago, much less several centuries.

After Anne avoids the first body-slam, the third magiknight appears immediately, following a page of Anne wondering where they are, and showing a map of her run up to this point. (The map doesn't seem necessary.) Throughout the entire chase, the third magiknight is the only one to talk, and then only to call Anne a bitch (rather than "halt" or alerting the other guards).

(EDIT: I was wrong! I forgot the last magiknight makes the comment "what are you" when Anne stands up after he knocked her down.)

I suppose I should point out that most of the first chapter is the chase with a lot of jumping and swordplay. Although if Tales of Midgard is going to be an action/adventure story with a lot of fighting like this, Liz should probably brush up a little more on drawing action sequences. This one is probably the worst and I might not have pointed it out here except that it looks less like Anne is expertly dodging a sword than she is expertly dodging a giant penis.

Like I said, most of her illustration is better... although the page immediately following this sword swing is another weirdly placed splash-page.

My penis can shatter stone!

If there were a splash page in that sequence, I think it would have been better used on Anne's dodging the blade than on the aftermath of the miss.

And that's followed by a carriage that appears to be in the Matrix Loading Program instead of the street.

Anne gets past the carriage and points out that all the maginkights so far have been "brutes with no speed or accuracy". These guys are mages? Working in service of the monarch? It does get more difficult as there are now two of them ahead of Anne, which she expertly dodges again. (Plus, there's that background that was missing behind the carriage.)

The very last magiknight appears to have a fighting style that involves constantly being off-balance and occasionally presenting his back to his enemies.

He does eventually land a blow against Anne on another splash page (and a good place for one), although the art is rather confusing... I couldn't really tell what was happening here.

Apparently she blocked the blow, but was knocked back into some barrels (empty?) that broke open. The magiknight is amazed that she's able to stand after taking the knock, although I'm not sure that explains why he didn't have time to catch her.

So Anne is able to get to the water-mill for her much hyped "plan B".

Which turns out to be jumping from a high window into the river while wearing plate armor.

And then it's time for a recap from the magiknights. I'm not sure why their dialogue is suddenly an ominous white-on-black.

Also, many of these balloon tails are confusing, and black on a dark background doesn't help.

When Anne comes up from the water, we get our only glimpse of magic in the first two chapters. How many magiknights was that? Eight of them? And not ONE spell between them? Was the wrestling leap a spell?

The second chapter opens with our first real glimpse of the anachronisms; a train.

And another couple anachronisms; a newspaper and the Grand Archives, which from context sounds a lot like the Internet. A little work on the composition of that first frame could have allowed us to see Erik's head and fixed the problem with the dialogue that's causing those parts that don't have full balloons. (Although to be honest, I think full balloons could have been used there without causing any problems. They're done that way to reveal parts of Anne's armor that aren't necessary to understand the story.)

Oh, and a third anachronism in that page also; the corporate bureacracy of the Dyrian Knights Order. Magic is also treated in this modern way, with the characters discussing "units of magic energy" as often happens in roleplaying games.

I understand that there's a goal of showing the height difference between Anne and Erik on this next page, however, with a little work on the composition, that can be done without cutting off his head in the third panel. The first panel showing the stairs and the delivery sign isn't necessary. The second panel should have been in profile so we could see all three of the people speaking. And in the last two panels, Erik could be standing more behind her so that their heads are side-by-side in the shot, allowing you to get those two panels side-by-side instead of above-and-below.

The silent disagreement between Anne and Erik is a classic trope and a well placed joke. Nicely done.

The dialogue balloons didn't have to cut into Erik's head in the 2nd panel - you could have used the extra whites-space in the lower-left corner where nothing's going on. In general, don't cut into a character's head if you can avoid it.

"That's what I'm afraid of" is another classic trope, and I would say it's a fairly well placed joke. I'm personally nonplussed by the fact that it's perpetuating the negative stereotype of women as spending their money frivolously.

Honestly I think the backgrounds are sometimes the better illustrations. Although those lamp-posts and buildings look pretty modern. There's a lot of glass for even a rennaissance period and especially the top of the building in the back of the second panel looks like a modern office building. I suppose the lamp-posts could still be oil-based rather than electric, but the design aesthetic just looks really modern to me. To be honest that clothing looks pretty modern too.

This is the point at which Erik starts second-guessing the job they just finished. He brings up some of the things I was already thinking during the chase in the first chapter.

And now the lettering starts getting weirder. We see a bunch of places where dialogue balloons follow unnatural right-to-left reading paths and a few other issues that make it hard to know which block to read next, who's speaking, etc. Many of these problems could be resolved by pruning the script (like I mentioned before), improving the panel choices, composition and character placement. This page is crowded but not the worst to read.

Pardon me for a moment while I nerd-out on writing dialogue... If you write comics yourself you might find this interesting, otherwise, skip down.

I would have simply trimmed a lot of this writing.

In the first panel, for example:

Anne: Hey Erik! What's up.

Erik: I booked passage on the August Albatross tomorrow morning.

Anne: The expensive cruiser from Dyr to Ilial?

Erik: That's the one.

That's genuinely all the information that's relevant for the reader in this first panel. Having "everything we need" until they get home should be assumed -- the only time it should be mentioned is if they lack things or there's a question about resources. The second panel runs dialogue balloons for Anne and Erik together, which was probably an oversight, since I saw that same thing fixed on a later page.

Also, the rest of the page:

Anne: Woohoo! That'll be great!

Erik: Hope so. Also, Sir Alvis wants that yearly report as soon as we reach Dyr.

Anne: Uhh... Thanks.

Erik: You've got enough cash, you should fix your orb if you don't replace it.

Anne: Yeah, I can totally afford a new one. Good night.

Erik: 'Night.

On the next page, nice backgrounds with street-lamps that definitely look electric, since they hang down from above. Dialogue balloons in the 2nd panel that are round like they're spoken? But she's alone, and the balloons in the previous panel were cloud-formed thought balloons... but neither of them have any tails, and using the bubble-tails for both would have clarified that they're all thought balloons, whether cloud-shaped or not... but they really should be one way or the other, not both. If thoughts are cloud-formed, they should always be cloud-formed to avoid confusion. Also, when balloons are separated on a wide panel like this, left-to-right takes precedence over top-to-bottom, so the text in these balloons is in the wrong order.

More nice backgrounds the next morning. Some of the water on this page is particularly nice. And then the beginning of dialogue balloons that run the wrong direction (right-to-left), which could have been easily avoided by placing Anne on the left and Erik on the right while they're sitting there on the dock.

These dialogue ballons run the wrong direction again and again.

There's a couple of pages of elegance on the Albatross before they arrive in Dyr. Stepping off the ship, it becomes apparent that the "orbs" are cell-phones, and they even ring like a telephones. It turns out a few pages later that Anne and Erik's second assignment is stealing back the "info box" (flash drive) they stole in the first chapter. D'oh! Personally I feel like the plot ought to have started developing this kind of complexity at least in the second chapter if not by the end of the first, but as I've said, these pacing issues are pretty easily resolved.

I realize that I've offered a lot of criticism of the trade-craft of comic making here, however, those are all minor and to be honest easily resolved issues. I think this story has a lot of promise, it just needs some cleaning up. If you enjoy fantasy stories with roleplaying-game-styled anachronisms, it's worth a look at Tales of Midgard.

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Thanks! Sam

(IV)

“So why me?” Adrienne paused, introductions over, now it was time for business. She put the TracFone on speaker and set it down on the coffee table, next to a red RC car. The toy and slightly cracked iPad had been returned to her by some sly fox. Reclining back on the couch, she considered her words carefully as she fiddled with the wrapper of a watermelon Jolly Rancher. As promised, the tarot card reader delivered. Those two small moments that night, removed from cameras, helped her not to think about what eventually did happen. But honestly, she didn’t get the same personable feelings from Matt Knox. He seemed ornery and sometimes rude. It perplexed her that he spoke out like he did. “You could have had your pick of anyone. Silvio. Willis. Anyone else.” “I need a reason now? Because you’ll hurt them as bad as I will, kid. Sure he probably annoyed those two, but he flat out insulted you.” “I’m used to it.” She appreciated his vote of confidence but her anger towards Lab Rat King amounted to little. She had ran at him with all of these thoughts of taking him down a peg or two and well, the boot shaped bruise on her neck told a different story. So here’s this Alex Winter being as deplorable as possible and she’s going to hurt him? Like injure his pride even? What a pipe dream. “It’s a nice thought. I’ll do my best, Matt. But you were right, it’s like he knew. Like he knew what buttons to press...” Trailing off, she changed the subject quickly. “In a general sense, you know.” “Yeah. General.” A pause, Knox exhaled on his end. “Fuck him in the neck. He shot off at the mouth, and kept shooting off. His own partner is irritated with him. We play this right, this is fish in a barrel. And we both get what we want." This man’s swagger was something Adrienne could definitely use more of. She could do without the swearing but that was just her. But yeah, the attitude, there was a difference. Like watching him get back into the ring, it seemed like he never left. Admitted ring rust or not, he was quite formidable. He hit hard and he spoke bluntly. Despite the glum start to her career, it seemed like people were taking notice. She had made some assumptions about that attention. Including Matt Knox. Something prodded her to stop internalizing this. Take a risk. Take a leap, so to speak. “So this is my first tag match. I know the rules well enough. And right now, I think we have an advantage. I don’t see Alex and Steve remaining cohesive as a unit. However, I’d be remiss if I didn’t just say this.” Take a big leap, Adrienne. “So I know you’ve got daughters in the sport. I’m not one of them. And I’m not a kid. Technically, I am a rookie. And maybe this sounds like a broken record but I’ve been in the business since I was nineteen years old. So I’m your peer. Your tag partner, Matt.” ”Of course you are, Mrs. Levi. But you also have only gotten active in the ring… what, a week before I returned? The week of? There is a chasm between us as far as experience. Far greater than the chasm of talent, and the one of grit. I wouldn’t have asked for this match if I thought I’d need to carry you through it.” And well, there it was. Matt had a point. She’d been pretty relieved. Years of offering her opinion and rarely receiving a sensible reply had left her gunshy. “Alright. Cool.” So then there’s the matter of capitalism being rather cruel sometimes. New month and her wallet was already coughing mothballs. “I’ll be honest. I don’t have the resources some of you have. I’ve seen personal rings set up. I’ve seen where some of you have the means to just up and move-” She stopped, sensing an interruption. “Listen, if you can get back to Baltimore, go to the Marriott by the Harbor. Rooms 201 and 204, check both, ask for Bert. Tell him I said rent you a room through the next Chaos. It isn’t charity, but we can NOT go into this without at least kind of training as a unit.” Adrienne didn’t expect anything to be handed her but her brain swarmed with what was to her an astronomical cost. “Now, I gotta go break up a child fighting ring in the desert at a wrestling festival. I’ll see you soon.” “What?” He had already hung up. If you can get back to Baltimore. He made that sound easy. Done fiddling with the wrapper, Adrienne popped the Jolly Rancher into her mouth. Her mother was out of the question. She had left nearly a dozen text messages. Despite not being a fan, Angie had watched. And she was beyond angry about what transpired. Her texts were delivered in all caps. All of them accusational in nature. Or absolute frightened concern. But the last one was curiously subdued. Time stamped moments after Adrienne set down the microphone and limped away. wow love u, ade Love you too mom Convincing her mother to lend a few hundred bucks to get to Baltimore to meet a man-- well, Adrienne would never finish the request. In the small hallway before the front door, her white Fuji Absolute leaned against the wall. Her only mode of transportation. In something that only evoked embarrassment, she had never learned how to drive. Danny was cool with that, of course. Katy from work, former work, had always offered to buy it. After the miscarriage, Adrienne didn’t feel like correcting her Mother at that time, Katy got real interested in fitness. She always said the bike was being wasted in A to B use. Probably. It was another present from Danny. “Time to walk more, I guess.” She retrieved her personal phone. U still want the bike? Just moments passed. Yeah. 250 200. Meet in middle? 225 Sure. Drop it by Kaplan? Meet u in lot Just days after returning, she swung back around to Baltimore. As promised, there was a room in her name at the Marriott at Camden Yards. A note from Bert told her to take an Uber to a warehouse nearby. She entered from one of the side doors. The shelves were stacked high with canned goods but there was also a huge clearing as she stepped forward. Smack dab in the middle, there was a full blown wrestling ring set up. Some guy in a light jacket and a beanie was tightening the turnbuckles with a wrench. He looked up as Levi’s sneakers squeaked on the concrete. He had light blue eyes, kind looking despite a gruff exterior. “Bert?” With an exerted effort, he gave the wrench one more twist. Shaking the top rope, he was satisfied. Adrienne kept her distance as he finally acknowledged her presence. “Yeah, you Mrs. L?” “Adrienne.” Bert rolled out of the ring. “Come closer, echo’s a bitch in here.” Stepping just a few feet closer, she clutched the strap of her gym bag. “Knox’ll join us later.” “You’re his trainer?” “No, I mean, yeah. Long story. So where you learn at?” He seemed to start denying that but he got this smile on his face, like he was saying something facetious in nature. Adrienne hadn’t heard of a trainer who was possibly younger than the trainee but maybe Bert was a prodigy. “Down where I live. Redd Thunder.” She shook her head, that was his ring name. He’d been a decade removed from active competition. That friend of Danny’s who she drained her savings for. “Greg Berkowitz.” “Who?” Bert chuckled, “Sorry, so you want the truth, Adrienne?” Adrienne nodded slowly, she knew what was coming. “Imagine you paid a pretty penny and it's sad ‘cause you can’t even run the ropes right. Knox saw it right as rain when he watched your tapes. That’s all taught though. Everything else you’re doing? It’s like some raw instinct shit. That big ass jump to the outside? Took some huge balls.” “Thanks, I guess.” “Don’t thank me yet. Matt and uh, I have less than two weeks to retrain you on the basics. Otherwise, the two dipshits are going to eat you alive. That means less money. For all of us. That love of the sport gibberish doesn’t mean anything if you can’t eat.” That resonated with her. A month more of this and she’d have no choice but to crawl back to Kaplan. If they would even have her. “So what do I do?” “Bathroom’s in the back. Go get changed.” Bert gestured wildly behind him to a singular restroom at then end of a short hallway. “We’re going to start over. Later we’ll get you in front of a real rig. Have you give them a piece of your mind.” This was a stark contrast. The last three times viewers had seen Adrienne Levi, it’d been her filming herself. That term was to be used loosely. First, audiences were treated to the grainy camera of the iPhone 5 - or was it 6? She couldn’t remember. It had been another one of his gifts. Second, the videos were vertically shot. Third, if one liked the shaky camera movement of the Blair Witch Project, Adrienne was their girl. Instead, here she was, in full view. Dressed in a sleeveless black shirt that in bold red font proclaimed her the Queen of the Simps, black nondescript tights, and her beat up used pair of black wrestling boots. Adrienne was in front of a black backdrop splashed with the logo of her employer. “This one?” She pointed, just to the side of her. Someone off camera directed her attention to the camera that was actually on. “Oh, you. Sorry, I’ve never seen so much equipment set up before. Just for me to chat with you all.” Adrienne smiled quaintly. For the moment, she just stood there, shuffling her feet. She eyed something to her right. “May I? Been on my feet this whole day. I mean, this isn’t formal, right?” Walking off screen, she returned with a steel folding chair. Snapping it open, she placed it backwards and sat. Straddling the frame, she rested her elbows on the back of the chair. Mat burn was prevalent. “That’s better.” Now what was she going to say? Her mind has been swarming with all of the events of the last week. The obvious was her encounter with the Lab Rat King. His vicious ways had filled her nightmares that last few nights but truthfully, she preferred that monster over others that would traipse about in her subconscious. This sudden partnership with Matt Knox perhaps.Things had been more clear after their first real conversation. And finally, there was Steve Matthews and Alex Winter - two diametrically opposed newcomers who would serve as her opposition. “So forgive me, I got a little emotional on Monday night.” The boot shaped bruise on her neck was a startling reminder of why she may have been. “There are a lot of adages I’ve heard lately about my less than stellar start here at Carnage Wrestling. Not going to bother with them. You get the gist. I’ve just gotta keep trying, right?” She tapped fingers on the chair, pausing to allow that question to be affirmed. “I’ll say this, I was really wrong about some folks here. You’ve gotta understand something. Any competitor worth their salt doesn’t want to hear that their failure was like … a good try. That’s where I decided to put this into perspective. Other than losing to someone in my debut that lacked any conviction to back up her powerful proclamations, I’ve squared off with world class athletes…” She frowned. “... and a seemingly invincible foe. But here I am. Ready for more.” And then returned to a more neutral calculating expression. “I appreciate the compliments. I want to pay it forward.” Adrienne held one finger up. “Matt Knox. I think I would have like a little notice before you issued this challenge. But I get it. You and I have something in common and it’s not a good thing. Zero wins between us. Here’s the thing. You’re smart. You know what it takes to win. And having lost it all, you know how just bad it can get. Fighting with you prior, I trust you as my partner.” A second finger. “Steve Matthews. You’re Carnage’s Ace, despite never appearing prior. And you’re The Technical Master. A cursory look tells me you’ve accomplished a whole lot in your storied career. You’re as advertised in the ring. But with accolades like yours, it makes me wonder why you’re not just facing Amber Ryan in your debut, championship on the line and everything. Instead, you desperately accept an open challenge to cozy up with an individual who you can’t even stand.” She smiled, maybe relaying just a spark of sarcasm. “You’re pretty confident in your abilities but one thing I know about the art of tag team wrestling is that you’re only as good as your partner. Judging by your interactions with Alex, you think this is all about you. And I’m not reaching when I say that Alex Winter doesn’t believe much in this fragile alliance.” Adrienne held those two fingers there in an inadvertent peace sign. She shook her head, looking maybe a little disappointed. “Gosh, I apologize, Steve. I’m supposed to be complimentary towards you and well, I guess I’m not. You speak emphatically about how serious you take this business and that’s kind of cool. But other than that?” She shrugged her shoulders, then resting her chin on her forearms. “I don’t know. For all of that blustering about how you don’t advocate for your partner’s actions, you sure are complicit. It speaks negatively to your character. Like you’re unable to decide if being a good human is okay. Your companion doesn’t believe that so while you’re threatening to betray him, you’re still not explicitly condemning him. It makes you kind of … and I’m sorry, weak.” Sitting up, Adrienne raised a third finger. “Alex Winter. You paid me a compliment.” She’d been thinking about Alex Winter a lot lately. Through mere Twitter exchanges and one brief video, he had sure made an impact. Adrienne was sure he would consider that he was living rent free in her mind. That wasn’t the case. Rent was due and the price was something this party animal could never comprehend. “And so maybe I should have just smiled and batted my eyes.” And she did, displaying a strange flash of attitude as her expression then steeled. “I promised this to even you. Like your partner, you’re pretty impressive in the ring. And so perhaps when you throw out cliches that you can walk the walk - maybe you can.” Alex Winter had spent a lot of his career overseas in Japan. And now he was here to test his mettle in the states with over a decade of experience. Maybe Danny and him partied together. Probably not. Danny Levi was …. was not like Alex Winter. “But back to your compliment. I didn’t take it as one based on your reputation, more on that in a moment. Your response was to get pretty defensive. And so it makes a girl like me wonder, did you really mean to make me feel good? Because instead you just made some assessment of my attractiveness. Instead of seeing Adrienne Levi the person, you just saw my face, my body, my whatever. Imagine if you had said: Hey, you had a great match! After all, we share the same profession.” Awkwardly, she stood up. In fact, she nearly fell backwards in the chair. Would have made for a good visual as she is trying to address someone looking for any weakness in her. “You got real defensive because this sort of thing affects your reputation. You ever wonder why I chose to not view what you said favorably? You registered on Twitter very late into June. It took you just one day to solicit a woman to show you her … can I curse on here?” She looked around. “I’d rather not but look, in relation to a woman asking people to wear masks for what is obviously going on in the world, you turned the subject sexual in nature. On the same day, you responded to another woman’s picture.” Adrienne considered the content, tapping her chin. “Now when you made your advance, she said no, you persisted with some video of you pantomiming a sexual act. I don’t know how to tell you this, Alex, but if that is your technique - there is no wonder why you’ve been rebuked so many times lately.” She twisted the chair around, now sitting it in as nature intended. “And then it all kind of devolved. Slander, you claim. The problem is that it isn’t really that far-fetched to believe these sorts of things about you. It’s an easy correlation to assume that when someone says effectively they don’t respect women, that they’re a misogynist? It’s totally feasible that a misogynist also thinks less about minority populations because sometimes their struggles intersect. Now, you’re right. Just because you’re a misogynist who sexually harrasses women on the internet doesn’t mean you’re guilty of being a rapist. It does however make you very guilty of contributing to rape culture.” Pausing for effect, she crossed one leg over the other. “I don’t know a lot but Alex, it’s been an eye opening year for me and I’ve learned alot about myself as a person and that I could have fought instead of hiding ...but I’m not ...I’m not going to hide from people like you anymore.” Sighing, Adrienne looked upwards before returning her gaze towards the camera. “This is more than I wanted to talk and you know what stinks? This match could have had a different narrative. Matt Knox, my partner, he’s a former world champion but do you know what’s cooler than that? He’s overcoming some very public issues to return to the sport he loves. And you two? You guys are excellent professional wrestlers. Instead it’s about Alex Winter backpedaling after his atrocious suggestion that I should be leashed, muzzled, and doped up because I dared to call him out for his unwanted compliment. It’s about Steve Matthews being spineless. It’s about whether those two can even get along. Well, you know, I’d like to think there will be a better ending to a story that is told all too often.” Standing up, she felt something unfamiliar. Danny called it his machismo. But it felt like swelling in her heart. Her voice raised above the little chirp she was known for. “What is it about you two? Steve, those that standby and watch the injustices get no reprieve. And Alex, you’re a relic of the bygone past. And you don’t seem to be paying attention to what’s happening around here. Just last month, I watched Kyra Johnson prove she is Ultraviolence. And Amber Ryan is the Ironwoman. Then there’s Catalina Cortes, she’s a champion too. And Poppy. And Jenova! I’m sure I’m missing a few and I’m super sorry about that because you’re all amazing. They’re also all counterpoints to your ignorance. And then there’s me. I’m nobody special. But with Matt Knox, we’re going to end you before you even begin.” The camera lingered even though she had finished her piece. “That’s all. Nothing much else to say. You can turn--” The feed cut.