#I've been working on Akutagawa's birthday the entire week and today Akutagawa posts were all over my dash. I'm so happy! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kunikinnie · 2 years

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I've Never Been In Love Before

Pairing: Akutagawa x GN!Reader

Almost Blue Series Masterlist

Genre: lots of pining, maybe fluff?

Word Count: 996 (excluding lyrics)

Warnings: probably ooc

a/n: It's technically my first time writing a fic for him and I'm not really sure if it's accurate to his character lol. Anyway have an awkward Aku (which should've been posted last week but eh)

Link to song, if you'd like to listen

I've never been in love before Now all at once it's you It's you for evermore

The last thing Akutagawa Ryuunosuke expected was catching romantic feelings - for you, of all people.

Your paths rarely crossed even though you both work for the Port Mafia (or at least too infrequent for his liking). Yet no matter how sparse your interactions have been, they have definitely left a lasting impression on him.

He honestly doesn’t know when it started. All he noticed was that his heart would beat a bit faster or that his hands would sweat a bit more - nervousness which he at first ascribed to hostility but would soon discern to be far from that. Hadn’t Gin made him realize its true nature, his feelings would have gone unnoticed for God knows how much longer.

I've never been in love before I thought my heart was safe I thought I knew the score

Clearly not. Just hearing your name could paralyze him.

“Hey, it’s Y/N!”

Tachihara waved his hand eagerly at your approaching figure. Akutagawa assumed you did the same, although he had no way of confirming that as his back was facing you. The temptation to see your bright smile was all too strong, but the tightening in his chest was too much for him to bear.

In a flurry of thoughts and an empty stare, he began to walk away just as you approached the small group. He coughed when you called out his name and simply nodded his head in acknowledgment. If he turned his head ever so slightly, you (as well as your company) would’ve seen just how red his cheeks had become - and since his skin was so pale, the redness was even more pronounced.

“Is he okay?”

Tachihara only shrugged. “Probably.” He noticed just how strange Akutagawa would react whenever you were around, but based on your reactions it seemed you were oblivious about it. He smirked to himself, wishing his superior the best of luck as you continued to talk about your day.

But this is wine It's all too strange and strong I'm full of foolish song And out my song must pour

He was never a man of words, nor was he expressive when it came to his emotions.

Which is sometimes he’d unknowingly stare at you. His eyes rest on your eyes, your hands, or your smile - whichever part of you they land on. Maybe you’ve noticed, maybe you haven’t. He just hopes you don’t find him strange or creepy.

Whenever you were close to him, an outsider might have thought he had the intent to kill you because of the intensity of his stare. This would be worse whenever he had to say anything to you.

“...good job today.”

And other single-sentence words of praise. But it’s even harder to watch him whenever he wanted to give you something.

For example, on your last birthday it took him until the last possible minute to hand over your gift. The entire day he kept your present in his coat as he waited for an opportunity to give it to you in person. But even though he encountered you several times since the morning, he did nothing. He’d freeze and end up not saying anything at all.

It was a small pack of cookies that came closer to resembling dust as the hours passed. He wondered if it was even appropriate to give you anything to begin with. Would it be too much? Should he just greet you like any other person did?

In the end he had the present placed on your desk with only a “Happy Birthday” written on it. There was no name to be found on the note, but you immediately recognized the scrawled handwriting.

Little did he know that his indirect and small gesture would have touched your heart in ways he thought he could only dream of.

So please forgive this helpless haze I'm in I've really never been In love before

It happened all too fast, and now he was sitting down alone on an elegant chair in front of an elegant table in an elegant café. He stook out like a sore thumb like a terrified child waiting for his parents to come pick him up.

How foolish of him to accept such a spontaneous invite from you. He could have declined - he really should have. He had no time to prepare at all and now only panic consumed him from the inside out.

But all his fears were allayed the moment you stepped in.

“I’m sorry for making you wait, Akutagawa-san.”

You wore a bashful and apologetic look on your face with a certain tenderness to it, one which he had rarely seen.

How foolish of him to think he should have declined.

“It’s alright.” A cough followed in an attempt to hide his embarrassment. He cemented his fate as he watched you settle down on your own chair, yet the anxiety still wouldn’t leave him.

“I’m glad to have caught you during your free time - you know, to relax a bit. The tea here is good, and I heard you like tea, so would you like to try it?”

Minutes passed and he found himself in casual conversation with you. He appreciated your company - no, he would go so far as to say he enjoyed it, and the desire to leave that table became almost non-existent.

Soon, your order arrived and he took a small sip of the tea you recommended. The refreshing taste tickled his tongue and his body immediately relaxed.

“So, was I right?”

A small smile appeared on his face. “Yes, yes you were.”

He didn’t know how long you two were talking, but to him it wasn’t long enough. Just when would he be able to be this comfortable with you again?

You stood up to leave when a sudden boldness took over him. He called out your name before his brain could control his tongue. But as your gaze became fixated on him, Akutagawa knew it was now or never.

“Here, no-” he cleared his throat. “Let’s- let’s come here again next time.”

His eyes were far from you, cheeks stained with a certain redness you’ve become quite fond of lately. You chuckled at his attempt at an invite but accepted it warmly.

“Sure thing, as long as it’s with you.”

#bsd #akutagawa ryuunosuke #akutagawa x reader #akutagawa x y/n #akutagawa x you

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