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roseadleyn · 1 year

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𝙁𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙚𝙣 𝘼𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙡. || 𝘾𝙖𝙨𝙨𝙞𝙨 𝙋𝙚𝙙𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙖𝙣.

for @that-one-pretty-bitch as a part of my event. thank you so much for being a constant inspiration baby, ily <3

‼️ cassis in this is after chapter 36. because of this, he's more eerie and.. ah, unsettling, than his season 1 character. ‼️

yes i'm actually doing a non flower related title, can you believe it?? anyways enjoy 💞

— rose.

back to event masterlist!

affection — how do they show their love and affection?

cassis shows his affection through quality time or acts of service. invites you over for tea, offers to help you with your work, makes time to tell you old stories about his family. you take his monopolizing nature at surface level; brushing it off as light possessiveness. nothing more.

well, you got one part right. it's nothing less than possession.

blood — how messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

cassis tries to avoid killing; he's not very bloodthirsty and prefers to solve the problem through talking. however, if there is any sort of physical threat to you, he's not opposed to snapping a few necks.

cruelty — how would they treat their darling once abducted?

he's not cruel! ...most of the times. he's kind towards you but is so fast to turn on you that it leaves your head spinning. demands the knights who are stalking you, at sword-point, to tell him about every little thing you did in your day, from what you ate to who you talked to.

the thing is, you can't even remember the last time cassis allowed you to interact with anyone who wasn't him or your handmaidens.

darling — aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

no. he doesn't like seeing you cry and sob hysterically so he'd rather not. as for sex, that can wait. he doesn't want to shatter you completely, so it's better if you want him to before he tries to get you in the sheets.

exposed — how vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

you thought dion felt vulnerable? with cassis, it's like a constant wound, always bleeding, the blood dissolving the bandages so that he never quite stops worrying about you. something as simple as coming late to bed and his mind is already conjuring up horrible scenarios of you being snatched away by the agriche and —

very, very, very vulnerable. he's not this vulnerable with anyone else and even tries to hide it from you — vulnerability is a new thing for his proud, haughty spirit.

fight — how would they feel if their darling fought back?

hurt. because when you fight, he ends up having to force you, which inevitably ends in tears and broken bones. he doesn't want to hurt you! just obey, just listen to him and do as he says, don't resist as he hugs you close or grabs your wrist so tight that you have to beg him to let you go because he got too jealous and —

if, just if, you manage to appease his jealousy, you'll be fine.

game — is this a game to them? how much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

it annoys him. he barely gets to see you because of how busy he is, and when he does get to see you, you scream and thrash around and make ridiculous attempts to escape. it's tiresome and he will shut these escape attempts down faster than dion killed ashil.

hell — what would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

you once made a very bad deal with one of your handmaidens once in a desperate bid of freedom. not only did cassis catch you, he decapitated her on the spot, rubbing in the fact that it was your fault. and even that wasn't all — cassis kept you captive to his bed with a chain just long enough to give you access to the bathroom.

you can't remember the last time you moved on your own.

ideals — what kind of future do they have in mind for their darling?

cassis wants to marry you. he's always been the romanticist type of guy, and there's something so.. heavenly about marrying you — this way, he'll get to bind you to him forever through the marital vows.

and unlike callisto, who gives you a choice, cassis will marry you regardless. the most he'll do is postpone it.

jealousy — do they get jealous? how do they handle it?

he feels jealous, of course, yet he's not going to act on it in public. the minute he gets an opening, he steers you away, his grip unyielding on your shoulders, offering a tight smile to the person causing his jealousy. handles it by isolating you more than ever, spending most of his time with you, just to convince himself further that you're here and you're not ever leaving.

kisses — how do they act around or with their darling?

obsessive. he adores you. kisses you until you're breathless, wraps his coats around you, never lets one moment in your rather unwilling company pass without reminding you of just how much he loves you.

you'd really rather he didn't.

love letters — how would they go about approaching their darling?

like a picture perfect gentleman. asks if he can greet you, dances with you at every party, his touches on your waist featherlight. once you agree to let him court you, he's ecstatic, spoiling you with everything and anything you ever dreamed of, wrapping his arms around you, as though unable to believe just how he got so lucky. (author: cassis, if you hurt jacqueline, i — and a whole cult — will murder you.)

mask — are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

well, nobody would ever guess this side of the heir of pedelian, right? that he locked you up against your will and ignored your sobbing as he explained your situation? that he has spies all around to make sure you don't lift a finger the wrong way? that he holds you close, turning a deaf ear to your quiet crying?

why would anyone suspect that?

naughty — how would they punish their darling?

small things, but long punishments. his favorite one is isolation. he'll give you the cold shoulder for as long as it takes for you to come back — and you will. you can only spend so long, completely alone, before losing your will to fight, right? and you're always so sweet about it too — lifting up the covers to his bed, placing yourself beside him, tapping him on the shoulder with a pretty, careful finger, letting him welcome you back with open arms.

oppression — how many rights would they take away from their darling?

at first, he's very open with it — he lets you roam the gardens with your maids and very, very, very rarely (infact, it only happened once) lets you go to town — in disguise and with him, of course. but eventually his jealousy might take hold of him, or some kind of threat would be detected towards you, which, of course, would make him paranoid. then you're lucky if he allows you to leave the bedroom.

patience — how patient are they with their darling?

up to a certain extent, cassis is patient. he's fine if you struggle and thrash about and cry and scream — these are fruitless efforts and he can crush them easily, but words — if you say anything, whether it's pitying or mocking, that makes his heart twist in on itself with that horrible empty feeling —

do that and he'll give you a real reason to cry.

quiet — if their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

no. he quite possibly will never enter into a relationship ever again, completely complacent, absolutely hollow. if you managed to escape or leave, and he couldn't find you, he'll blame himself day and night, u able to get you out of his head even still. and if death was the one who came for you, he would just... yeah, he would never recover.

regret — would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling?

often — when you curl up and sob, nursing injuries or fighting nightmares — cassis feels an inexpressible urge to just hold you, to just stay there, until you stop weeping. he's no soft kind guy, but this — this hurts. just stop. just accept that this is now your life, and that it's not goingto change.

stigma — what brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

harsh expectations and the agriche. he needs to protect you, to make sure you never, ever, ever go through what he did — ever again. blame the agriche if you want but they're honestly more amused than sympathetic 🫶 have fun babes

tears — how do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

he feels terrible. don't you understand that it doesn't have to be like this? that there's no reason to cry? why are you so unwilling to stay with him, what can he not give you that everyone else can? he doesn't get it.

unique — would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

cassis would never steal your belongings or build some kind of creepy shrine or downright devote himself to you. it creeps him out to be honest — even his adoration doesn't fly to those particular levels. this might be due to what he saw of maria at his time with the agriche — and it honestly terrifies him to this day.

vice — what weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

his love for you, obviously. sob and cry about how you need one particular thing, and watch him leave immediately to get it. you can seize the time to run!

i'm warning you though — he will find you.

wit’s end — would they ever hurt their darling?

not willingly. even though his punishments can be severe, they're very rarely physical, and never brutally damaging. after the agriche, he dislikes physical violence and tries to avoid it — only when it comes to you.

xoanon — how much would they revere their darling?

too much. there are times when he just looks at you — truly looks, as though just taking in the fact that you exist — and he feels his heart flutter like the wings of a butterfly. you're so perfectly beautiful with pretty eyes, and satin soft hair, and the tears running down your face — it's not art, but it feels divine , all the same.

yearn — how long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

roughly 2 years. he steps up a year after meeting you and stars courting you normally — but this lasts only for another year. he gives in on you two's anniversary, knocking you out painlessly, already feeling regret and guilt sift and twinge in his gut.

“ ... i'm sorry. but i needed to do this. for you, it was all for you, it is all for you. ”

zenith — would they ever break their darling?

as much as he doesn't want to — yes. cassis is delusional and obsessive and manipulative and possessive — and he grows more and more demented than ever. he rarely lets you out of the shared bedroom, claiming that anywhere else is too dangerous. he doesn't let you shower on your own, and everytime you try to take one by yourself, he decides that perhaps it's time for a soak anyways. it hollows you out, reducing you to an empty shell of yourself, just lying there on the waves.

realization hits cassis fast and hard — when was the last time you tried escape? why does he want you to escape? the smile he loved so much is as good as dead because he's never ever gonna see it again.

you don't react when he buries his face in the crook of your neck and cries.

—

tagging ; @writerig, @loekas, @nxccolo, @ykassu, @dion-s-lawyer, @ithil-lucien, @that-one-pretty-bitch (obv, this is hers), @sidra-29, @hmerus, @cerisearan, @dxmoness, @chxrrylxdy, @d10nsaint, @meow-meow-potato, @parkykwho, @izumi-astra-123 and @palaceofghosts.

[ i didn't tag the mutuals who don't like yandere content (that's why @/crownxie isn't tagged) but i did tag those who are on hiatus rn since they tagged me when i was inactive and everyone else still does ]

i hate this! but! here you go, jacqueline!

—

#꒰ ☽︎ ꒱ — stars.#the way to protect the female lead's older brother #twtptflob cassis #cassis pedelian #yandere manhwa x reader #I'M FREE #OMFG. I DEVELOPED A FEVER BECAUSE I OVERWORKED MYSELF TRYING TO FINISH THIS #And now it's done #And it sucks #— queue.#im sleepy asf

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drifting-pieces-blog-blog · 4 months

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Breaking down the comics: BEMIS. Part 4

READING THINGS SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO!

Part one is here.

Part two is here.

Part three is here.

Issue #197.

Oh look! Burrows is back! …It’s a sad day when that makes me happy. Which means that this is going to start to get gore filled again. Yay.

I'm going to be perfectly honest here... I didn't finish the Bemis run. When it first came out, I was so pissed off after a while that I stopped reading.

I can't remember which one I stopped at, but I have a strong suspicion I know the point it was.

So you guys? We're going to be surprised by the ending together!

Anyways...

Back to the moldy bread factory we go.

We start with three cloaked guys (very cult looking) and five other guys.

The five other guys all sit down at a stupidly long table.

The leader welcomes them all. "Welcome to the Bi-Annual Feast of the Societe des Sadiques. You have been chosen--Selected--from a vast pool of candidates. Having proved your loyalty, your zeal, and your passion."

Oh good... Let's see who we got this time. Bemis seems to like to put in strong stereotypes and then just make fun of them unfairly.

We start with a photographer dude with thick glasses and a bit of a sad stubble face.

Then we have a female drug lord and executive level madame. I have no idea what that is, but she's stressed up in a 'little black dress'.

Then we have someone that is just listed as having 'a particular distinction, even in this group' and he's in a Guy Fieri flame shirt.

Lastly we have a shirtless man with tattoos and piercings all over him and a green mohawk. "A tattoo artist, body piercer, and reality television mogul".

So be prepared to have Bemis give them all incredibly dislikeable characteristics. You ready?

Cause this is a group dedicated to "Sadism, in all its shapes and forms."

We are going to get a look at what Bemis considers extreme sadism as well as people that find it not only enjoyable, but also get off on it sexually.

And I will take the stance that I have nothing against consensual sadism. Every fetish has a time and place as long as everyone involved is enjoying themselves and also has safety in mind!

Bemis isn't going to do that. He’s only going to show the bad side. And try to make it edgy.

The leader asks the four others to tell them how they came to 'know and practice your fascination with the pain of others'.

We start with the photographer named "Liberation".

You see him as a teen getting into photography. Specifically the early 2000s in New York at the "coked-up rock shows". We see him taking pictures at a punk rock show, taking pictures of a couple making out in a dingy dirty corner of the club. Then we see him taking pictures of a passed out person in a toilet stall that has ODed on probably heroin cause there's a needle next to them.

I'm not showing this.

"I photographed my first cadaver in 2001."

He talks about fashion photography that was run more like a frat party. How popular he got and how "brand" he was.

Despite all this, he felt his true calling was in death photography and that he was sure that there would be people interested in "black market photography."

"Snuff Couture".

For those that don't know, Snuff films are films that feature people dying. Many of these films have been proven to be fake death films that are very violently acted and very real looking. On the dark web, there ARE real films out there. It's...Don't look this up. I grew up in the beginning of the internet and remember the unsafe place it used to be. I've seen things I shouldn't have seen. Don't look into this one.

So he was killing people and taking pictures while he did it then selling it to other people that 'taste'.

The group claps and they move on to the next person. The drug lord, Lyla.

She talks about how the mafia isn't what it used to be and that the chinese economy and triad was edging them out of jobs.

"What was going to be a straight-up assassination of the head of the Triads could have turned seriously messy when his wife and 2-month-old child turned out to be home at the time."

You see a bunch of dead guys and a woman holding a baby. They shoot the woman and you see a happy baby covered in blood. The baby is Lyla, who apparently got adopted by the Mafia after they killed her parents.

"See, it would have been some kind of weird fairy tale if I was brought up by the mafia don who ordered the hit. My life would have been a walk in the park. But when they stole me, they entrusted me to Daniel DeCriscio, also known as "the deathbringer" in the press for being, at the time of his death, the most prolific and brutal hitman of all time."

Apparently he taught her exactly where she was from, made her fight on the streets for her food, and she wasn't allowed to sleep or eat till she trained with him.

"I learned to kill before I wore my first bra. And so I did. Kill, that is. A lot. I think I was nearing triple digits by the time I was 20. I was good. I rose through the ranks."

She eventually became his replacement assassin and murdered her 'father'. She became a 'Made Man' (not how it's done but that's a mafia lesson for a later time). She slowly killed off the leaders until she became the main leader.

Badda bing badda boom.

Next guy is "Sol". The Guy Fieri shirt guy.

"Well, I started out by lobbing grenades in public places and running away. No particular motivation besides...throwing a cog in the machine. The weird thing is, they never caught me."

This is called terrorism.

"So, I went on to start murdering random women from 1999 'til the present."

This is called misogyny.

"They didn't catch me for that, either. I guess I made the cut because I'm the only living man who's been both a serial killer and a mass murderer."

Not true. Not true at all.

The group claps.

Lastly, we have "Tilt" the tattoo guy.

Wanna know how I know Bemis has no idea about tattoo culture?

The way he depicts the tattoo parlor.

You don't show up to 'watch people work'. And a topless lady? This would be done with a privacy screen and people wouldn't be gathered around like that taking pictures.

Tattoo artists, PROPER ones are actually very protective of their work. If they designed it, it's their art. Doesn't matter if it's on your body, it's still their art.

We see depictions of 'outrageous' piercings. Some of which are medically unsound. (A piercing that goes on the underside of an eyelid? Yeah, have fun with your corneal ulcer).

Then he did a tattoo show. We aren't going to talk about the controversial tattoo show who I won't name here. Just know... It's not well thought of in a lot of circles.

He got rich and "Being rich made it so I could have whatever I wanted. And all I ever really wanted....Was to pierce someone to death."

Uh huh.

So we see shadow images of bodies with outlandish piercings (Which, not all of them would actually cause death... I've seen people with some of these piercings).

He brags about perfecting the art of 'hurt'.

He then tosses in a completely unnecessary background. It's just not needed. He should have ended it with the images of the piercing. This is just over explanation of things and bad writing.

"See, I came from nothing. Grew up in pretty horrible circumstances. I was already mad then. And once I had money, they started treating me different. Like now I was finally worth something. That made me even madder. So now... I get even."

Why is he shirtless here? Why when you have a heavily tattooed and pierced man do you always have them be shirtless? Is it a macho thing? Wear a shirt! You have to protect your tattoo from the sun! They're going to fade and get shitty!

Anyways, the group claps.

One of the hooded figures sits down with the group.

"Woo-Hoo! Another classic. I love how not dark this whole thing is!"

Lyla is offended by the hooded guy sitting next to her.

"What do you think you're doing? Do you know who we are? You're barely fit to serve us booze."

"It was pretty good, though, right? I heard this wine pairs well with psychopathology."

"Get out of that seat, trash."

"Well, the thing is, Lyla, you charming flatterer... I'm actually here for the induction ceremony. I'd like to throw my hat in the ring."

He takes off his hood and....

I hate this art. I hate so much about this.

A sadist. Making Moon Knight into a sadist. Specifically Marc.

Marc is not a sadist. Marc hates how violent he is. He hates his anger issues. He had issues in other runs with…murdering the bad guys… But I don’t think Bemis knows what makes a sadist.

A Sadist is NOT someone out to watch others be murdered, be out for revenge, or tossing grenades and running away.

According to the dictionary… “Sadist: A person who derives pleasure, especially sexual gratification, from inflicting pain or humiliation on others. “

They bask in other’s pain. They cause pain and enjoy witnessing the pain they are causing.

So... Moon Knight assures them that "No, no! I'm not $%#& with you! I really am! I mean, yeah, I got into what I do to save people's lives. I'm a good guy. But I was messed up as a child and ended up with Dossociatve Identity Disorder. LIke, there are other people living in my head. People cope with mental illness in different ways.

Rather than become a bad person myself, I decided to start professionally beating the snow out of evil criminals. It's basically my job. And you have to start enjoying your work or...what's the point?

That broken part of me is made of bleak, pitch-black fury. So, the blood-spray and bone breaking... I won't lie, I enjoy it. I look forward to it, sometimes. Hard to admit, but it's true."

I HAVE SO MANY PROBLEMS WITH THIS.

He is implying that mentally ill people are inherently violent. 'rather than become a bad person'. He says that he has people living in his head (as if he is the house owner and they are paying rent!?) and rather than become bad, he had to chose to fight crime.

That his trauma, his illness, his everything means he was going to fall down the same path of evil.

DID DOES NOT MAKE A PERSON EVIL! I know so many systems and they are all such kind and wonderful people. They are traumatized. They are in pain. They are doing what they can with their lives and NONE of them are bad people or violent or evil!

Marc carries on. "So, I'm going to hurt every one of you. Hurt you badly, if you don't cooperate. And yeah... I'm going to kind of really, really enjoy it. Did I make the cut?"

The other henchmen open fire on him.

Just as things are about to turn into a brawl, someone else enters, telling them to stop.

"The masked man is not to be harmed. At least...Not yet. I knew this day would come. In the exclusive circles I run in... The threat of your existence, as well as your true identity, are a known quantity."

He's not exactly ever been good at hiding his identity, but Bemis keeps saying "my exclusive circles know you well!" Who the hell are these circles? Is there a MK watch group out there? I wouldn't be surprised.

Oh good. They're playing coy banter.

"And I knew you'd know And that one day I'd find you. Why do you think I'm here?"

And the new mystery figure tells him that he's arrived in time for the ritual.

Then he gives Moon Knight a hug that no one is happy about.

"[...] You've earned a personal invitation...courtesy of your Uncle Ernst."

Oh good. The Nazi is back.

And that ends this absolute trash of an issue. Nothing happened in this episode. We got people doing their best to be VAGUELY scary or menacing then had them immediately be upstaged and then an old Nazi showed up that looked weird and gave Moon Knight a hug.

ISSUE #198.

Alright, intro! Oh look, the blurb has updated.

Why is the society of sadists in French? French doesn't automatically make things authentic or fancy.

The Societe des Sadiques. "A secret group of uber-sadists" is meeting up for some biannual feast for their new inductees. Moon Knight shows up, on the hunt for their 'mysterious leader-Ernst, the Nazi who Marc witnessed torturing a man in his synagogue as a child, the traumatic event thta fed into Marc's dissociative identity disorder."

I hate that I had to type that sentence. It was long and badly worked and also just... I feel so dirty.

"Now Ernst can follow through on his ultimate plan..."

Oh for cry out loud...

I don't even know where to start.

So... We have Ernst addressing his audience, made to look like he's talking to the reader. He's got a little Moon Knight toy and he's wearing what looks like a purple jester collar.

I'll show you in a second because I want you to appreciate this.

He's gonna monologue for a solid minute or two.

"And so our drama begins, dear audience. In which a flawed hero is tested. His already dubious moral standing called into question Is he man, or is he dragon? Today, the societe des Sadiques will tease out the essence of his core."

So are we supposed to forget the fact that he's an ACTUAL Nazi?

Here's the problem. Now Bemis is going to try to turn him into a modern day villain that's worse than the Nazi he was.

And you can't do that. You can't take an original Nazi that admitted to atrocious crimes against Jewish people and then put him in America as the head of some murderous sadistic cult. That doesn't make him worse. He was already as bad as he can get. This feels like a step backwards and almost like you're apologizing for him being a Nazi in the first place and trying to explain it away.

If Bemis tries to make it about Ernst having a terrible childhood to explain his sadistic needs to be a jew torturing/murdering Nazi I swear I'm going to lose it.

"I confess...There's a part of me that wants to see him escape this spiritually unscathed. But this is our GAUNTLET. Where the contenders for entrance into our society are made to discover just how truly merciless they are.

In the end, they'll face one another, and if they can live up to that...Then we shall bless them."

What on earth is he talking about and why should we care. Bemis sure loves his long pointless exposition babble.

"As for our Little "Surprise" guest...I can only say his arrival has been anticipated. Call him a Pet Project.

If I were a betting man... I'd bet that what we are about to witness...Is the birth of a monster."

Uh huh. That's disgusting. Why was this needed? Ew.

And now we have Moon Knight on some sort of light runway with people in masks all around clapping.

Why is this all so bad?

Oh no. Here we go. Here it is people! What you've ALL been waiting for.

You've heard us talk about it in passing. "Don't read Bemis. Rabid Dolphins".

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.

And now here we are.

I give you... Rabid Dolphin:

As someone who has spent an upsetting amount of time studying Rabies… I have a LOT of questions. But I’m just going to move on. I don’t want to give this more brain power than I need to. Because what’s about to happen is upsetting enough. I’m just going to apologize for making you witness the rabid dolphin incident.

In this next part it's called "Second trial Man vs. Inhumanity.

I don't even know what is happening here. YOu've got some sort of paper mache room? There are animals in statue paper mache and some big guy that's covered in paper so only his head is visible.

Marc walks into the room and finds a newspaper article on the wall. The paper man yells at him and tells him not to read the paper. He's pissed that he's there and swears up and down that he knows people that can make his life a living hell.

Marc reads the paper. "Sickening 'torture farm' raided by FBI. Jess Ebidiah, 38, implicated in what may be the worst case of animal cruelty in the history of California."

Uh huh.

Marc takes out a moon crescent and it just says "Trial passed."

Third Trial: "Man vs Himself".

This is where I just get angry. The dolphin hurt my head and made me tired. Now I'm seething.

So you see a guy in a weird outfit that looks like a cross between the punisher, a luchadore, and a gimp outfit.

He introduces himself "Greg Salinger, AKA Foolkiller."

He's a crime fighter that is also a licensed Shrink.

What does that mean? Is he a therapist? A psychologist? A Psychiatrist? What the hell does 'SHRINK' make him? What credentials does he have? Not all 'shrinks' are trained in how to handle all problems. Some specialize in PTSD, dissociative states, or other things. Not all are equiped to handle D.I.D.

The man addresses Marc by name and tells him that the cultists are forcing him to do this under threat that his family be killed if he doesn't 'assess' Marc.

Marc takes a seat at the couch and the shrink asks what Marc did to the man in the last room.

We don't get to hear the story, but in the next panel "Three minutes later" we see the therapist trying not to vomit (that's professional). Even the cultist guy with the gun on them looks shocked.

This is a cope out. Bemis wants us to think it's some unfathomable horror that can even make the therapist vomit.

"Marc, it's my opinion that you suffer from certain...OTHER chemical--and Personality-based--Disorders outside your clinical diagnosis of Dissociative Identity Disorder. See, I know what it's like to want to stop criminals from hurting people, but...The sort of actions you describe suggest a pathology that...Marc, has anyone ever spoken with you about Bipolar II? Or the spectrum of Personality Disorders relating to Borderline thinking?"

PAUSE. MAJOR PAUSE.

As I noted off the bat in part 1. Bemis is Bipolar. Self diagnosed or professionally, I'm not here to question it. If he says he is Bipolar, then he's Bipolar.

He's attempting to Move Marc into a position he can self identify with. Which, unfortunately, moves him away from DID and into a different area that Bemis can claim to now be an expert on and therefore no one can question him.

There's a major problem with this. It DOES take him away from the spectrum of DID that exists and forces him into another one and also putting all these negative traits he's given to Marc onto Bi Polar people, making the audience start to associate all these terrible and dangerous things with them.

It ALSO is taking away from something called System Accountability.

This is something that is learned in systems and it does take time to trust in the system for it to work. It also involves a heavy amount of intersystem communication.

It means that if someone in your system is an asshole, the WHOLE system is responsible for making sure that this asshole gets help as well as attempts to NOT be an asshole.

It means that no one is out there beating their spouse and claiming it was 'the bad alter'.

Even deeper, it means that they have developed a fail safe to protect the body. If someone is hurting the body or putting it at risk, the rest of the system can take charge and make sure that person is no longer given access to the body until they are able to get help.

You only get one body and you have to share it. This takes time and trust, but it is something I've seen done.

We've seen it done in the MacKay run when Steven forced control away from Marc so as not to cause them further trauma.

UGH.

UNPAUSE...

"All very common. These things don't ever make you a mean person. On their own they in no way imply... But the MIX... You've got a heady mix, there, champ. And it's pretty apparent someone hurt you very badly at some point. The thing about it is...

I think you need to admit to yourself that your need to hurt people may go beyond just wanting to protect others. An addiction to sadism isn't anything to scoff at...Or frame with a pretty costume and make disappear. I'm sorry, Marc. You have to start thinking of it like...A nearly incurable disease."

NO. NOPE. Not even remotely… This is SUCH a cope out. And why in each run does Bemis have an ‘epiphany’ moment with Marc realizing that he’s a terrible person and having to go on some inner journey down some path where he realizes the bad guy is right?

The therapist babbling about some sort of ‘mix of personality’ issues… ANd ‘incurable diseases’. Ableist shit.

What Marc has is trauma. Extreme trauma coming from more than one person or place in his past timeline. He hasn’t learned how to handle his trauma or how to connect with people. He views himself as deserving of his trauma. Thus, he views himself as a bad person or thing that deserved what happened to him. He’s also incredibly angry about it and dealing with generational trauma being placed on top of everything else!

This is a fact. This is coming from the Moench/Zelenitz run. In the Lemire run he takes it a step further and deals with Marc’s fear of attachment and abandonment issues. As well as his uncomfortable realization and acceptance that he has DID and he has to learn to communicate and talk to Steven and Jake and they have to work as a team.

Putting ALL this on MARC alone is not okay. Treating it as some sort of horrible disease and blaming his violent tendencies and ‘insanity’ on a chemical imbalance and on his DID is just… I want to beat Bemis with a DSM book.

"Third Trial completed. The Hero is crowned a Prince of Death." And we see him being dressed in cult robes by guys in moon knight like masks. I don't even know anymore.

Even though we see them clearly fitting him and measuring him in PURPLE, in the next scene he's in a fully new and fixed up white Moon Knight suit. Who knows.

….I don’t remember this next part. I honestly think I stopped reading the run at the dolphin bit. Oh no. I thought I got further than this. There’s still two issues left. Oh no…. Did I skim the rest out of frustrated rage? You and me, dear reader…We’re going to get through this together. We got this.

Fourth Trial time. "Fun with Morpheus, Dream Eater."

YOU. HAVE.GOT.TO.BE.KIDDING ME.

I'm gonna... I'm going to punch something.

That's not Morpheus. And Marc knows how to handle Morpheus. This isn't what Morpheus DOES.

"That's for that time with the thing."

BEMIS DOESN"T EVEN KNOW WHO MORPHEUS IS OR WHAT HAPPENED. He's just throwing him in because he thinks he can mess with Marc's mind!

Morpheus is a DREAM maker! He attacks with 'dream waves' because he himself can't sleep or dream.

So we go to the inner world where we see the boys all in gladiator and medieval armor in ruins.

Steven: "I thought he said he wanted to handle this himself."

Khonshu: "He is holding onto a grip that is...Tenuous, to say the least."

This is bullshit.

This is not how his system works.

this is not how they work.

See current MacKay run to see how they work together when they are attacked psychically.

He also went ahead and gave them 'roles'.

Steven is "The Mind", Jake is "The Robust Undercarriage". Khonshu is "The Spirit".

Then we see a fourth blank space, probably reserved for Marc?

So... Fifth Trial. "Royale"?

We see him just fighting the four other guys from earlier.

His outfit looks purple here. Maybe it was supposed to be purple in the other image and they got the shading wrong. I don't know. I hate this art.

Moon Knight has zero trouble dealing with these 'sadists'. "Trial? Nah. Spanking" it says.

You see, these guys aren't fighters. I don't know why they think they are or Bemis thinks they should fight MK.

They are sadists that enjoy picking on the innocent and incapacitating their victims to torture them and kill them. The only one that knows how to fight is the assassin, and all she does is stand there with a gun shooting him till he punches her out.

Marc stands over the bludgeoned members of the cult and yells at a camera. "Ernst. I get the damn point. I'm ready and I'm yours. I've always been %#^& YOURS!"

I would like to remind you that Ernst is a Nazi.

Steven in the background says "I...I can't do it anymore..."

Khonshu tells him to "Let him go, Steven. He will not let our traits serve him now. That duty falls to...the other."

Ernst calls him 'my son' and invites him in.

"Trial 666." clever.

"The entire society, though not present tonight, has been anticipating this moment for a long time. I knew eventually when you were ready, you'd track me down. I knew the seeds I planted would bear fruit, my little...First-round pick."

Bull shit. Marc was not supposed to find out about Ernst. He told Marc not to go to his office till much later and he wasn't expecting Marc to find his hidden place in the basement. Then he ran off and didn't confront Marc again. This wasn't 'all according to plan!' I HATE when the bad guys do that. There was no plan. It cheapens the value of the surprise of the hero finding out in the first place!

We see a very TIRED and broken down Marc as he follows Ernst into the back room.

"All it took was the careful manipulation of your...Friend...Jake Lockley's undesirable "sources". I always saw something in you. Now you must see it in yourself."

Are you kidding me. Is he going to blame this all on Jake?

Jake the Most Jewish Part of his System?! The one that speaks Yiddish and openly presents himself as Jewish?!

Ernst walks Moon Knight down a long badly designed hallway with pictures of members. You see some guys in Nazi uniforms from WWII and various other guys that we don't get close up pictures of. Because Bemis lacks imagination...or Historical knowledge.

"Choice one. You fight us. ALl of us, our full might, focused soley on you. You almost assuredly, will not make it back to see your daughter alive, nor save her from me. Two. You abstain. I eliminate your child. It would take a wave of my hand. Only your value to me has prevented this so far. Or THREE. Complete the ritual. Become what you were MEANT to be, beside me, forever." And he gives Marc a picture of Diatrice.

Oh. Oh wait. No. I remember this now. Fuck. I had completely blocked it out of my memory. Fuck. I have regrets.

I’m going to need a minute and I advise that you all take a minute too.

This…This is worse than I thought it was. Worse than I thought it could be.

EXTREME TRIGGER WARNING: Racism. Nazi idealization. Race wars. Implied child harm.

This is bad. I can’t stress this enough. We’re about to talk about some really fucked up things.

I am going to… very carefully…sensor this. It needs to be talked about. This didn’t age well. Especially with the way things have been going for the past several years.

So please… tread carefully and take care of yourself. If you need to nope out, I respect that. If you have had enough and need to just stop and go “Yeah. Bemis was bad. I’m glad I didn’t read that” then do it. If you need to know, then let’s continue.

***************EXTREME TRIGGER AHEAD*****************

So Marc turns to the door after he's locked in a room with his choice on what he has to do.

Fight them all (which I don't get how this is a choice because we know what Marc can do. But the threat of him losing and them going after his daughter is there.) Surrendering and losing his daughter. Or becoming one of them and doing 'what needs to be done'.

He turns around to find out what his next task is.

I don't want to draw this out. I really don't. Bemis does. It does it because he wants the impact of what his choice is to hit you hard in the stomach.

And it does. It hits VERY hard. But not in the way Bemis wants it to. He thinks he's being clever. He thinks that he's set it up so that Marc has been pushed too hard and realized like he did with the Sun King that the villain is right and he has to do it.

So he wants the reader to think the hero has given in and might actually do it.

This is BAD writing.

Instead, the way it comes across is scary. It's fucking scary because of the current climate. Because of all the things that happened in 2020. Because of all the things happening now.

I'm so angry right now. I'm angry and hurt.

I'm going to just TELL YOU what the choice is then I'm going to back track and show you the lead up to it. Okay?

*****He wants Marc to murder a little black girl*****

Backing up. Let’s…Let’s just take this a panel at a time.

Marc sees the 'choice' before him and he reacts with disgust.

And we finally see Jake speak up. He's been pretty quiet this issue besides lurking in the background.

And knowing what Bemis does with Jake and what he obviously thinks of Jake... You're about to see why. And Bemis probably feels like he's being so clever and doing some sort of redeemed character arch. Only the character he tarnished himself and now is trying to make better?

"Being your dark side"

I'm so angry.

I don't even have the energy to explain it. I've been explaining it. If I haven't gotten through to you yet...

"And now you won't even...To save her life? Sometimes horrible decisions have to be made when Nazis get involved."

This is how the holocaust got started.

This is why no one stood up against them when they saw and then denied and refused to acknowledge what was happening.

"You think I want this to have to be my call?!" Jake is yelling at Marc.

Marc shuts down and curls up in a little ball on the floor.

"I don't wanna. I don't wanna. Ah God... Dad... Dad, where are you? He made me... I saw..."

So we see Bemis' version of a PTSD type of flashback shut down.

I can't say if this is accurate or not because everyone is different. I've had shut downs before. Both silent and a few with some sort of pleading similar to this but never to anyone in particular. So sure. Close enough I guess.

In this shut down, we see Steven, Khonshu, and Jake standing there watching.

None of them move to comfort Marc.

Jake "take that as 'feel free to take over until I grow a set of STONES, Jake'"

I'm frowning so hard.

Jake pops up in the body, complete with full mustache. I guess it was in his pocket? Even though he is wearing a whole new outfit?

"Hi, my name is Jake. Don't worry about anything. Just be...Just be very still."

The 'choice' pleads with him not to hurt her.

"God in heaven, I'm sorry. I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this!"

Yeah... Ignoring all the other issues... There's also a major flaw in the religious talk here too.

Jake stops and drops his crescent dart. "I don't want to do this."

Ernst is displeased. He thought for sure Marc would do it and join him. Because...I don't know. I have no idea. I just... Maybe I'm not filled with enough self righteous rage to be able to think like a Nazi?

He tells his people to "Clean up and move out. This is over".

And we get our first look at the girl. I'll let you judge how she's portrayed.

It’s pretty clear that he asked for the most innocent young looking version of a black girl he could get. Even gave her the pigtails.

Before he can do anything, the room opens up to show them in the middle of a forest clearing surrounded by cloaked guys.

A large airship shows up. Moon Knight prepares to fight all these guys.

We get TWO quotes.

Now... Keep in mind that this run has been about Nazis.

So do we get a quote from that time period? Or a quote about the evils in the world?

Nope.

"The Killing was a means to an end. That was the least satisfactory part." -Jeffrey Lionel Dahmer.

The serial killer, Dahmer. The one that was a sex offender who killed and dismembered a whole lot of young men. He then ate and performed necrophilia on them. As well as turning parts of them into things like lamp shades and thing...

Dahmer was diagnosed with Borderline personality disorder, schizotypal personality disorder, and psychotic disorder.

I'm sensing Bemis is trying to make a parallel.

Next quote?

"A psychoneurosis must be understood, ultimately, as the suffering of a soul which has not discovered its meaning." -Carl Gustav Jung.

Back to quoting JUNG. I have a lot of issues with JUNG's philosophy Especially when it comes to his views on the nature of personality and roles and how they can often be wrongly attributed to D.I.D. I’m nog going to get into it, but at lot of people jump to Jung in an effort to sound smart and like they know what they’re talking about even though they only ever read maybe ONE thing on Jung or heard a quote by him once and went “there’s a smart guy!”

Anyways. This issue is over.

Two more to go. Just two more… Then we never have to look at this bread again.

ISSUE #199.

Oh look. We got a new artist. Davidson. Ah fuck it's Paul Davidson again.

Becky Cloonan did the cover. Which is why it looks so nice and lures you into a false sense of security.

Can we skip this one? Like…. Legit… Is it needed? It is the most garbage filled issue. You thought the last Davidson issue was bad with Mr. Butterflyman and the collective?

So... We open with Ernst in a cafe with Marc.

Ernst is yelling at him about how there "No such thing as Multiple Personality DIsorder or whatever your legion of soft, pliable brats choose to call it these days."

Uh huh.

"Your trio of imaginary friends are merely extensions of your own whim. 'Mental illness'? 'Social Awareness'? Do not even get me started on the proliferated fallacies of 'queer' and 'multiethnic'. 'Me too! Me too!' SHEEP. You choose to dwell among sheep!"

This is hate speech. I've heard it in person. I've heard a lot of these EXACT things said in person.

He's attempting to caricature the people who make these speeches, but he's doing a piss poor job of it and it makes them come off as being 'in the right'.

He tells Marc, who looks sad and pitiful here in this style., that he has been 'whisked away from your punching circus and shot with drugs'.

This is what we call a cop out. He didn't want to have to write or lay out or have them draw the HUGE brawl that he lined up for us at the end of the last issue.

So he's taken it away and put us somewhere else so we can listen to this guy MONOLOGUE for an ENTIRE ISSUE about the bad things in today's society.

See why I want to skip it?

He also says "What happened to the little girl? [....] is irrelevant. Fill in the blanks yourself. Hehe. he."

Yeah... I don't like what that implies.

He tells Marc that this is his last chance. If he doesn't comprehend what Ernst is trying to do in this last test then Diatrice dies.

Marc starts to see a weird Cthulu thing walking by. Ernst tells him not to be distracted.

He calls him weak and crazy.

"I stole your heart in your youth...But this is not your Ghetto. Here I can grip it tight and squeeze."

I take serious displeasure in the fact that he talks about Marc's Ghetto. We know Marc grew up well off in a proper home. And a Nazi using the term Ghetto to describe his growing up conditions is just poor taste.

"Ask yourself....Did I break your mind? Or did we break your genes?"

Uh huh.

"We're friends, Marc. And I have seen your power. I am in need of an heir. And a young, able fist."

Ew.

"See. I was never a true anti-semite. I was and am a REALIST."

Are you fucking kidding me right now

"I realist offers fame, money, and power consolidated. Bargain bin vigilantes. You do not belong among them. Besides, soon none of you or your kind will matter. Du schwein."

This is disgusting.

You see why this is wrong, right?

He's now backtracking from the Nazi plot line. Saying "Oh fuck. I should have just made him a cult leader from the start. But I had to use some way to traumatize his past so his being Jewish was the problem the whole time!"

So now Marc is tripping pretty hard on the drugs and seeing monsters and demons and things.

You can see why I’m not posting much art from this issue.

Between the art (I hate this so much) and that LONG meaningless hate speech there, there is literally nothing of merit to this issue.

He goes on and on like this.

I have no idea what he's talking about. He's just saying things that sound meaningful and metaphorical at this point.

Blah blah blah "Here we can hear the fait, weak sounds of self-knowledge as our dark idea literally comes to life. Here, we taught it how to both love and despise itself. Perhaps what we created can think at this point? Like a child. AN IDIOT GOLEM who fancies itself some kind of philosopher."

The not so subtle use of anti-semetic language is not lost on me.

And you know what else we need more of? That’s right. Racism.

Marc protests he won't hurt these people.

Ernst yells at him to do it. "Make them hurt like you want the world to hurt, Marc!"

They are now in some druggy's house. He tells Marc to look at the man deeper and see the monsters inside him.

Marc yells out for Khonshu, Steven, and even Jake, asking for help.

And we see them trapped in some sort of Egyptian bubble thing under Ra's eye.

Marc rebells and Ernst kicks him in the balls. I kid you not.

Then tells him to "Say you're nothing but an errant SLAVE."

ANd Marc is on his knees crying and says he's his slave.

"Say I'm the first man you ever loved."

"You're not my dad. YOu're not my dad!"

"Join me or she dies!"

"I...You're the first man I ever..."

"Ha! You are like clay! Now. Say these words. 'I am no hero. I don't deserve my own infinity. ANd today is the day I finally give up."

NOPE. NOPE NOPE NOPE.

This here? This is anti-semitism propaganda.

They believe that the jewish people think they are uppity and holier than thou and will be the rulers of the earth and afterlife.

This is incorrect. This is Messianich teachings. And Bemis slipped it in. Didn't think we'd notice, but we did.

Marc refuses to say it and he fights back. We see Khonshu and Jake and Steven break free and start to fight the monsters and Marc hits him in the gut.

"Because I would rather my daughter DIE than grow up in your sick fable."

Marc tells him that he doesn't think his daughter is in danger because once the cultists saw Marc fighting back, they abandoned Ernst.

Ernst begs him. "Stop. you don't know what it was like, Marc. In Germany. For a man like me."

"I can imagine. My grandparents were Czech, remember?"

It's like Bemis can't decide what to do with the story line he already set down with Ernst killing Marc's Grandfather and fleeing Europe.

Even the art is inconsistent.

And he heads back out to the streets and it's still covered in demons and angels and cherubs and devils and so on...

And then he runs into "The Sun King".

Who Bemis probably thinks is the best villain ever because he made him. What a twist.

He doesn’t look like Jesus anymore. Why does he look like Rasputin now? Ra Ra Rasputin… LOL It’s a pun. And now that song is stuck in my head.

You know what REALLY upsets me?

The fact that BEMIS got a huge milestone…

ISSUE #200.

Art back to Jacen Burrows. Cover by Becky Cloonan.

This is an oversized anniversary issue. LAST ISSUE EVERYONE. I can see the end of this endless torture and bread factory.

Oh, Jesus is back.

Thanks Burrows.

Also… I have ZERO memory of this issue. I legit don’t think I read this issue so getting to the end will be a surprise to me.

We get a flashback to them all leaving the island.

Marc is talking to Sun King.

"I mean it! It's a Quasi-Max asylum run by the government, and they'll put you down if you even try to escape, but...I belive you can be redeemed. Maybe. In all seriousness, you need help."

Truth, remember him?, asks if he can go too.

Truth legit wants to be helped.

Ra is pretty pissy at the whole ordeal.

We get to hear a lot of psycho babble as Truth and Ra are analyzed.

I'm not typing all that up.

WOW. They just attacked Asecuality too! They're just adding to the list aren't they?

"The Truth's Asexuality a normal reaction due to being socially abandoned."

I lied. Here's more that boils my blood.

"...Mental Illness being both a difficult and challenging trait and a beautiful gift to be shared with others when utilized in a positive, giving way, as referred to in Dr. Lemire's seminal thesis, 'Healing, or: How to be okay with being you.'"

At least he's getting CLOSER to what Lemire was getting at.

We see Sun King starting to heal and also get his fire powers back. He is happy to have been paired with the Truth. They're bonding.

Then we see Ernst bust in with his cult. He spouts things about old money buying them out and tells them to come get one more shot at Moon Knight.

Now we are back to present times and Sun King looks weird again???

Marc tackles him in the street and threatens him. Truth tells him to stop and listen to him for a second but Marc isn't listening. So Ra attacks and burns up the cult followers around them.

Where is this going? Am I the only one that doesn’t understand where this is going now? With Ernst ‘gone’ and Sun king on his side for now and Truth doing his own thing… How are there so many pages left?

Sun King tells Marc that Ra can go to hell because Moon Knight is a good man while he himself is not. But he was born with fire powers so he's going to "Prevent the creation of 'monsters' like me. For the rest of my life. Or I will die, trying to eradicate that dead Nazi's legacy."

Marc tells Sun King that he needs his crew.

Oh look. It's the army of random regular people that Marc recruited from the island.

They all head to Marlene's house.

Marc tells Marlene that a crazy group of Nazi sadists are coming after them so he hired the Sun King and his goons to come help protect them.

Marlene Maces the Sun King despite being told not to.

Marlene starts to yell at Marc about his 'weirdness' and problems and that she can take care of herself.

Marc, Jake, Steven, and Khonshu gather with Marelne to form a plan.

Marlene points out that she can't see or hear Jake, Steven, and Khonshu and that Marc is just standing there in silence.

In the background we get a cameo with Dr. Emmett yelling about making Sun King Believe.

whoopie doo. Chaos. Fun. everyone's crazy. wheeee.

Diatrice interrupts (and she is drawn very poorly and kinda looks like a frog face with pink hair. I hate this art.

She drew a comic of them all saving the world.

Marc is in good spirits now so he and Sun King run off to...I don't know. Things.

And we find Moon Knight and Sun King facing the giant hover craft after it catches fire and crashes.

The dialogue here is... It's bad.

They fight more cultists.

And there's a big battle scene of Marc's army fighting cultists and things are on fire and Moon Knight and Sun King are fighting...

It's a mess of just like.... 2 giant spreads of just chaotic fighting.

Glad they are using this 200 issue anniversary well.

Sun King tells Marc that "you're pathologically violent but you, almost literally, wouldn't hurt a fly."

Then we...get Sun King's LONG back story that includes things like "My past is spotty, but I know I'm from the southern states and that I was born a Christian."

Who even asked?

"We 'Play for the same team'. Christians come from Jews who come from...It goes on."

It literally doesn't go on. It literally doesn't. But history. Can't be bothered, right?

He starts talking about Atheists, magicians, witches, and beautiful people all fighting for the right to believe in anything.

Then he goes on about "our fixation with the beauty of the Egyptian spirituality' and 'reconciling our peoples' ancient struggle and the uselessness of bigotry."

Whhhhhhyyyyy is he still going on about this?! NO ONE ASKED.

"Now imagine a mentally Ill "Power" whose ability was to take his own inner devastation and then force the world to believe it."

Almost sounds like you're saying DID isn't a real thing but just a construct of the mind that is being forced on others... Careful there, Bemis. You might give yourself away.

He tells Marc that there is a new leader to the cult. The real enermy is "The False Truth".

And we see Truth attached to some sort of weird machine thing. Ernst brain washed him to do his dirty work.

The Truth attacks and forces Ernst's knowledge on them.

Here we go...Ready?

"1935. Ernst is imbued by one of Hiler's mystical artifacts with what we will refer to as 'the blue corruption'." It infects people with 'self-created thought virus, or Meme."

fuuuuuuuuuuuu-

"1936 Jose Mengele creates an unseen subsect of Jewish people 'Infected' by the artifact under Ernst's supervision, using his brain as a conduit."

-uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

"This plan is unsuccessful, but the altered children remain and disperse into the post-holocaust diaspora.

There are images here. I'm not showing you those. They aren't good.

1938....(the war ended in 1945. Why is he...FINE. Let's go with it...) Something about comic books with 'corrupted ink' and preserving the medium's integrity.

1944 the war is closing. Erst is the only Nazi officer who has the corruption. His psychological devastation and personal history cause the corruption to turn into a sort of Venom?

Marc concludes that this all can't be true because then he can change what happened too and still have all his friends and be married to Marlene and have been there for their baby's birth....

This is false logic and I have no idea what he's talking about.

Marc tells him that he's too crazy to fall for Ernst's memories and truth.

They tell truth that the blue goo Ernst was injecting into him is making him crazy and aggressive.

Truth attacks them Moon Knight and Sun King again.

Things are said... Bad things.

They argue back and forth in an attempt for Truth to get them fighting. ...I'm not going to waste my time on what they said. Just know that it's poorly informed crap and more stuff about Jews being slaves to Egypt.

Then....Jake... sorta takes over? He attacks truth, smashes up the machine. He yells that he's "a Jew too." Then Khonshu attacks him too....

Then Moon Knight declares he is "No Man's Slave" and breaks his arm.

Marlene shows up? She yells at Sun King for a bit. Threatens to mace him if he ever goes near her kid again.

Sun King sticks up for Truth and notes that "allowed himself to have his mind warped by abusers." He offers his friendship to Marc.

Marc and Marlene agree...as long as he goes to a mental health facility first.

The orderlies offer to take Marc in for help too. He tells them he's fine and leaves.

Marc calls up Marlene to tell her he's coming home.

And we get at long last... WTF am I looking at?

I…I’m exhausted. It’s 3am Christmas Eve and I’m exhausted.

Why did I read this. Why did I put myself through this? Why did Marvel let this happen? Why did Bemis get away with this crime?

How did Moon Knight survive this run?!

Why did this run follow one of the best written runs ever?

I had plans to type up a big breakdown on why this whole two trade run was so bad… But if you made it this far with me (Thank you. Thank you so much. And I’m sorry), you know why it’s bad. You saw it.

I’ll be real… I lost steam here. This was like a 10+ psych hit attack and I’m just baffled now. That ending was so convoluted and trash. The plot didn’t know where it was going. The characters were so rushed. The pace had issues. The bad guy didn’t know he was a bad guy till he suddenly needed a bad guy. The main bad guy couldn’t decide on why he was the main bad guy… And the good guy kept having existential moments of “Maybe I’m the villain?”

It’s safe to say that EVERYTHING Bemis set up in these comics all faded away and were never touched again. With good reason.

It’s like he set up a whole world ready for people to use and patted himself on the back and thought he’d done a really good job and done everyone a favor and then the world had time to process what he did. And the smart people? They took one look and went “No. No no nononono.” And closed that door again.

Keep it closed. Lock it tight. Don’t let any of it sneak out. I beg you.

We don’t need this racist, anti-semetic, homophobic, ableist shit in this fandom. If you know someone that is a Bemis fan and cites it as ‘an amazing run’ or ‘one of the best runs’, I encourage you to REALLY look at that person. They’re probably not healthy to be around.

So… This was Bemis. Thank you for taking this journey with me. I need to go… go do anything that isn’t this. Expect some Moench soon. I need to not have this taste in my brain anymore. Questions and comments are welcome. Hate and bigotry are not. Feel free to discuss this run. But remember, Friends don’t let Friends read Bemis.

#Moon Knight #Moon Knight comic #Analyzing the comics #BEMIS #It's done you guys #I'm free #Friends don't let friends read Bemis #I did this for you #I'm sorry #I have so many regrets #Gonna go to bed #then read some GOOD Moon Knight

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manasurge · 8 months

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"You're telling me a Shrimp fried this rice?" meme, except instead it's "You're telling me a Charr broiled this steak?"

#gw2 #charr #this stupid brainworm entered my mind last night and still hasn't left so I'm getting the dumb joke out to get it out of my system lol #I'm free

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feminetomboy · 2 years

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C! SFW BEEDUO SLASH FIC MASTERPOST

Have you ever wished to read some /r beeduo, but fear what the Ranboo/Tubbo tag on ao3 holds? Have you ever wished you could somehow magically filter the tag, so you'd see only the character works, with no explicit content in sight? Well, lucky reader, I might just have what you were searching for all along.

I went through the entire goddamn tag, and I manually filtered out all the sfw c! fics so you don't have to. And then I compiled everything into a spreadsheet. That's right, I am just that incredibly cool and sexy and amazing.

Things I tagged each fic with: word count, completion, angst/fluff, au/dsmp canon, "Do they kiss?"*, pet names** and additional notes if I felt anything else was worth mentioning (and there are also stars for fics that we especially liked)

*Only if Ranboo and Tubbo kissed explicitly on the lips, didn't count forehead/cheek/hand kisses or anything else of the sort

**Didn't count Boo, 'Bo and Beloved, since those are extremely common in the canon.

This took me and my discord pals many many hours, so I would be extremely grateful if you shared this as much as you could!! ♥

For what is and isn't on the list, as well as a disclaimer, keep reading.

What may be included on the list:

works by authors that also occasionally write RPF (I try to let you know of this in additional notes so you can avoid them if you wish! Check disclaimer for more info about this particular topic tho.)

violence, gore, there's also some cannibalism I think. I didn't tag any CW, but there are reminders to check the warning whenever I felt the fic warranted that.

What isn't on the list:

fics centered around sexual content and or involving explicit sexual content (past or present) (there is one about pregnancy, I noted so in the additional tags) (I also cut instances where the characters were making out...heavily.)

fics about CCs or works that were too ambiguous to be able to make a clear distinction between c! or cc!

works from authors that otherwise extremely frequently write RPF nsfw

unfinished works that were +- below 3K and seemed abandoned or just not properly built out yet (though I did this step very subjectively)

as I went on, I also started cutting out fics that didn't seem to have beeduo as their main focus, or if there were so many relationship tags I felt like you could find them from there as well (<- read as: I got frustrated and left out a lot of SBI centric fics)

shipping fics that included relationships not canon to the DSMP (for example, I cut out TNTduo but kept Puffychu. There's also some light background DNF in some of them I'm pretty sure, though I literally do not think there exists a fic involving both Dream and George without it being DNF, so hey, that's my reasoning. But if you want me to cut those ones out as well, let me know).

Disclaimer: I hadn't actually read all of the fics. Unfortunately, I am not the deity of free time. I've tried to skim almost every single one to find out whether or not it truly is sfw and about c! (but only if it wasn't made abundantly clear by the tags or author's notes, or if I got general weird vibes), and tried to add any warnings and additional notes I could come up with when there were some.

I also hadn't checked each author and whether or not they had written RPF in the past - again, I simply don't have the means for that (and also because most of them are anon or orphaned anyway), though I DID check some, and anything iffy I found about the author I included into additional notes.

I tried to sort everything to the best of my abilities, but I am only human - which is to say, if you DO find some fic that you thing doesn't belong there PLEASE dm me and I'll look into it! We are a community, helping each other is the key 🧡

If you are the author of any of the fics on the list and for some reason want them taken out, dm me and I'll delete them!

If you've got your own fic on the slash tag and wish to have it on the list (if it wasn't there already), dm me and I'll look into adding it!

As for the final note, I'd like to thank everyone who supported me the entire week this took, the Hellen Hellenite discord that had to listen to me bitch about fics, and most importantly, once again thank you @likecarillonbells @uyun @deminjackets for helping me tag the fics and for the philosophic discussions over whether or not certain works are c or cc ♥♥

#tubbo #ranboo #beeduo #dream smp #dsmp #tubbo fanfic #ranboo fanfic #beeduo fanfic #ao3 #dsmp fanfic #this took so much time and also sanity you have no idea #i'm seriously considering going through our discord and compiling all my findings and stupid questions into a bts post #but it's done #I'm free

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tibozin · 7 months

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I tried drawing her face

I'm free...

#ttcc #toontown corporate clash #robot #anglerfish #deep diver #treekiller #fanart #cog #I'm free

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jt1674 · 8 months

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#the who #bristol #bootleg #i'm free #pete townshend #keith moon #john entwistle #roger daltrey

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ellalalala · 2 months

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The way I consume media is so interesting. I'll find a new game/show and discover a character that really stands out to me. I'll analyze them obsessively for weeks (whilst possibly simping for them along the way) and then move on to the stage where I hate them. Typically this will last a month or two before I finally reach an epiphany: that character is just like me.

I'll die before naming the characters I'm talking about but I think it's very easy to guess.

#how mysterious oh wow #I've thought long and hard about what this says about me and honestly #I don't care anymore #I'm free

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palepinkgoat · 6 months

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I listened to this song and started crying. It's a bipolar anthem if I've heard one. In the video it has an actor portraying her anxiety, so it's likely for that. But hey, it can work for lots of us. Man I wish you could have seen me in my car, crying with recognition. Thank you, Florence!

Sometimes I wonder if I should be medicated If I would feel better just slightly sedated A feeling comes so fast and I cannot control it I'm on fire, but I'm trying not to show it

As it picks me up, puts me down It picks me up, puts me down Picks me up, puts me down A hundred times a day It picks me up, puts me down It chews me up, spits me out Picks me up, puts me down

I'm always running from something I push it back, but it keeps on coming And being clever never got me very far Because it's all in my head And "You're too sensitive", they said I said, "Okay, but let's discuss this at the hospital"

As it picks me up, puts me down It picks me up, puts me down Picks me up, puts me down A hundred times a day It picks me up, puts me down It chews me up, spits me out Picks me up, puts me down

But I hear the music I feel the beat And for a moment When I'm dancing, I am free

Is this how it is? Is this how it's always been? To exist in the face of suffering and death And somehow still keep singing Oh like Christ up on a cross Who died for us? Who died for what? Oh, don't you wanna call it off? But there's nothing else that I know how to do But to open up my arms and give it all to you

'Cause I hear the music, I feel the beat And for a moment, when I'm dancing I am free, I am free I am free, I am free

#florence and the machine #bipolar disorder #anxiety disorder #mental illness jams #I'm free

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queen-scribbles · 3 months

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It’s Cold Outside

*shows up four five years late with the follow up fic to Let It Snow* HOLY COW, it’s finally done! \o/ Cribbing another Christmas song for the title bc I think I’m funny(especially bc the way this plays out is... pretty much the opposite of the song xD) ---- The snow had reached Brighthollow’s first floor windows and was still coming.

“Okay, I like snow, but this is getting ridiculous,” Adela commented, staring out the window. “It’s not as fun once it passes knee-deep. Then it starts being annoying.”

Heodan looked up from his book and smiled, “For growing up somewhere you said doesn’t get a lot of snow, you certainly seem to have strong opinions on it.”

“We don’t get a lot,” she said with a confirming nod. “That’s different from not getting any.” She raised an eyebrow pointedly in his direction.

“Adi, I have no strong opinion on snow,” he pointed out. “Cold in general I’m not overly fond of, but snow I don’t really care one way or the other.”

Adela grinned and crossed to flop on the couch near the fire, noting his chair was even closer to the warmth. “This an Aedyran thing?” she teased, folding her legs under her. “Increased sensitivity to cold?”

It was Heodan’s turn to raise an eyebrow. “We don’t all have fur, Adi.”

Her ears twitched as she laughed. “Touché. And I do know what Aedyr’s like. Aloth’s probably thanking the gods for thick stone walls right about now.”

“And fireplaces,” Heodan added.

“I think we’re all grateful for those.” Adela shifted, pulling her knees into her chest and resting her chin atop them. “No matter how adjusted we might be to the cold.” She smirked at a memory. “Even when you’ve had bad experiences with them a couple times....”

Heodan closed his book and leaned forward. “Do I want to know the story prompting that smile?”

“Oh, it’s nothing bad, and only slightly embarrassing.” She picked at the engraving lines on her necklace. “Ben, my oldest brother, is a baker, and he experiments with other cooking stuff in his free time. He’s really, really good, too. But, y’know, with him liking to cook and spending so much time around fire--ovens and fireplaces both--stuff’s bound to happen.” She bit back a smile at the Uh-oh in Heodan’s eyes. “The week before he got married, he singed off his eyebrows and half the fur on one arm b’cause he dropped a pot and leaned to pick it up without checking how close to the fire it was. He wasn’t hurt, but the kitchen smelled like burned hair for three days and me an’ Sirra teased him about it for months.”

He chuckled. “Poor Ben. What did he do to deserve such a scamp of a sister?”

“Oh, he gets me back,” Adela assured him wryly. “He calls me Cricket when he’s annoyed at me, b’cause I’m always getting cricks in my neck from reading for too long in one position.” She hugged her knees closer and bit her lip. “How ‘bout you? Any mildly embarrassing stories about your brothers?”

Heodan smiled as he pondered, fingers drumming the cover of his book. “A few... Before the family business picked up and started making decent money, Gyran and Lyam had to share a bedroom. One time when they were teenagers, Lyam walked in without knocking and caught Gyran and Lydia in the middle of what turned out to be their first kiss.”

She clapped a hand over her mouth. “Oh, no.”

He shook his head. “I’m not finished. Lyam made some smart comment--none of them ever shared what, exactly, he said--and Gyran spent the next ten minutes chasing him around the house with the express intention of tossing him out a window.”

Adela giggled, looking into the fire. “I think I’m with Gyran; first kisses are awkward enough without an accidental sibling interruption.”

He moved from his chair to the couch and raised an eyebrow in curiosity. “That sounds like the voice of experience.”

“With first kiss awkwardness, yes,” she admitted, face hot from more than just the fire. “Thankfully not with sibling interruption making it worse. I would also have thrown them in a pond or out a window. Fortunately, it was under circumstances where interruption was unlikely.”

“Oh?” No sooner had the word left his mouth than Heodan blushed and shook his head. “Sorry, I’m not.... not trying to pry.”

“It’s alright,” Adela laughed. She tucked loose hair back behind her ear. “It was a typical teenager thing” --she waved a hand vaguely in his direction-- “like your brother. Only mine was just a boy from school I’d been sweet on. I found out he was sweet on me, too, when we were working together researching Old Vailia for a history assignment. We needed a lot of old books and such that were in the back part of the library, very musty, a little creepy, where most people didn’t go unless they had to. Toward the end of our research, Xen said he thought I was very smart--and very pretty, and asked if he could kiss me.” She smiled and bit her lip. “After giggling like an absolute idiot for several seconds, I said yes and he did. I was so happy and flustered, I almost forgot my books when I went home.” She sighed, rubbed her elephant pendent. “Unlike Gyran and Lydia, nothing ever came of it, though.”

“Why not?” Heodan sounded almost indignant on her behalf, which made her heart flutter.

“Oh, it wasn’t by his choice,” she said with a rueful smile. “There was a rash of illness that worked its way through our town, and since his father was a priest and his mother was an herbalist, and orlans are responsible for all wrongs that befall folk, clearly it was their fault. They got run out of town. Despite protests from many, orlan and folk, that they were helpers and healers and would never hurt anyone. Prejudice is a powerful influence, and it won out. The illness continued sweeping around for another month and then died out on its own.”

“Well, that’s terrible,” he said, brow furrowed. “Did anyone apologize for the incorrect assumption...?”

“No, they all found ways to justify being suspicious, or pointed out there was no one to apologize to since Xen’s family had left....” Adela chuckled a little at his affronted expression. “Heodan, that’s the way it works for orlans pretty much everywhere. In fact, Necazoa was one of the better places in Ixamitl. Which is better than a lot of other places, like the Dyrwood.” She reached over and squeezed his knee. “Not everyone is as nice and accepting as you.”

That’s part of why I like you, she added to herself.

He made a noise of reluctant concession and gave her a wry smile. “According to you, my being so nice is why I’m here, all the way across the ocean, rather than one of my brothers.”

“I’m still allowed to be glad you’re here, even being pretty sure you got the short straw because you wouldn’t tell your family no,” Adela said with a laugh.

Heodan studied her face for a moment, gleam of firelight dancing in his eyes. “Who says I see it as the short straw?” he asked. “I like it here, Adi. I’m glad I met- all of you, got to have a bit of adventure--”

“Even if more than originally planned?” she cut in wryly.

“Even so.” He flexed the hand of his injured arm and smiled. “My nephews think I’m just about the most interesting person in the world, according to Gyran’s last letter.”

“Oh?” Adela smiled, playing with the tail of her braid.

“You, of course, are the most interesting, since you’re the leader,” Heodan clarified with an answering smile, which made her laugh.

“Well, you can tell them I’m flattered,” she said. She let her legs relax down, feet dangling over the floor, and shivered a little even if the fire was plenty warm. “You write your family about me, huh?” she teased, even as the thought made her insides do a funny little flip.

Was it her imagination or did his face go slightly pink at the needling? The firelight made it hard to tell. “They like to hear what I’m doing. You’ve been there for... everything since Echo Bay,” Heodan teased back. “It would be difficult not to mention you.”

Adela giggled, then winced. “Did they worry about the, um, gap? After Cail?” After you almost died.

He shook his head. “I had written right before we went to Searing Falls. By the time I needed to write again, I’d recovered enough to do so.”

“Did you tell them about--”

“Fighting a drake? Yes. How badly that ended for me? No. I didn’t see a point making them worry from a thousand miles away. Especially since by that point I was on the mend, and-” he reached over to flick her bangs out of her eyes “-I’m fine now.”

She supposed she saw the sense of that. There were few better things than hearing (or reading) ‘by the way, I almost got killed fighting a drake, but I’m alright now’ to give parents an anxiety attack. And she was careful with phrasing in some of her letters home, even without any calls that close herself. “So if you ever go home to visit, or they come here, they get to just be surprised you have an arm that doesn’t fully work anymore and some dashing new scars?”

Heodan arched a brow at her for the last bit of the glib comment. “I’ll worry about that when I need to, Adi,” he said, glancing toward the window. “I think our current worry needs to be sleeping arrangements.”

She hadn’t even realized how dark it was getting. The overcast sky and still-falling snow had thrown her off. “Did you have any thoughts?” she asked, standing on the couch to peer out the window and try to gauge how how late it was.

“If you have a spare quilt or blanket--or both--” he gave a self-deprecating laugh-- “I can sleep right here--”

“No!” Adela cleared her throat. “I mean, yes, there’s plenty of blankets and quilts, in the others rooms if not here, but.” She turned and crossed her arms, eye level with him thanks to standing on the couch. “The bed is more than big enough for two kith, Heodan.” Especially when one’s my size. “We can each wrap in separate blankets if you’re worried about propriety” --Not that I think you’d do anything-- “and this is not a terribly comfortable couch for sleeping on. So unless you truly want to sleep this close to the fire...?” She arched a brow, waiting, and Heodan just shrugged. “We’re both sleeping on the bed.”

He chuckled. “Far be it from me to resist such a passionate argument. You win, Adela. Where are the blankets?”

“There’s some in the closet, but those are mostly the out-of-season ones; the lighter spring duvets or sheets. One of us might do better to raid one of the other bedrooms.”

Heodan pushed to his feet. “Let me go see...”

Adela hopped down from the couch as he walked from the room and banked the fire so it would burn down slowly and keep them warm as long as possible, while still being safe through the night. Then she went to the closet and dug out the satchel of preserved foodstuffs she’d kept for snacking purposes before they relocated to the warmer--sturdier--keep for the winter. When she left it here she figured it would be for days using the room for peace and quiet, not because she got snowed in. But it was still good and that was all that mattered.

Heodan returned with three blankets piled in his arms. “I figured it would be easier to partially remake beds than fold things right to go back in storage.”

“And I’d agree with you on that,” she said with a laugh. “Dinner is gonna be like camping, I’m afraid.” A gesture at the jerky, dried fruit, and nuts from her stash.

“Only much better protected from the elements.” He dropped the blankets on the bed and joined her to eat. “I guess we need to be careful, since we don’t know how long we’ll be in here?”

Adela wrinkled her nose and glanced out the window. “Probably. Though if it gets too dire we can try for the main keep...”

Heodan followed her gaze with a dubious look. “Adi, it’ll be drifted higher than your head by morning. I’d have to carry you.”

“That’s why I said if it gets too dire.” She chewed on a handful of nuts, her heart doing a little flip at the thought of him carrying her. “Long as we’re alright, better to stay put and hope it clears up.”

He nodded and they finished in silence.

Silence that gave Adela time to actually think about what she’d insisted on in a blaze of impassioned indignation. You are not sleeping on the couch. They would both be on the bed. She and Heodan would be sharing the bed. He’d be right there.

Oh, stop it, Adi, she scolded herself. It’s not the first time.

But Gilded Vale had been a lifetime ago; her crush a small and flickering thing rather than a blaze in her chest. Even with them bundled individually in blankets, she wasn’t sure how well she’d sleep with him so close.

She counted her bites, chewing slowly. Not delaying. Lost in thought. How to act normal.

Heodan picked up on something from her behavior. “Adi, if you’re not comfortable sharing, I really w-”

“No! No, it’s fine.” She was hot enough to wonder if her fur was singed. “Just lost in thought. It’s fine.”

“Are you sure?” He rested a hand on her shoulder. “Because you just said it’s fine twice in as many sentences.”

“B’cause it is, I promise.” She stood and brushed crumbs off her dress, giving him a teasing smile. “I’ll even let you have the side closer to the fire; I know how you Aedyrans are about cold. And I have fur.”

He sighed but looked convinced. “If you’re sure.”

They each selected blankets and bundled themselves up in addition to the warm green and white quilt on the bed.

“I apologize in advance if I steal the blankets,” Heodan said with a sheepish chuckle. “Just know it’s unintentional.”

“Noted,” Adela laughed. “And I forgive you in advance. I’m sure I’ll be fine.”

They settled in, back to back with a small gap between them, and silence fell as they tried to get to sleep.

“Heodan?” Adela mumbled after a few minutes, only half-awake.

“Mm?” He sounded even more asleep than she was.

“If you finished that s’pply order you were workin’ on, I can just take it to Defiance Bay when I go for the hearings. Y’don’t need to bother a courier.”

There was a long pause, probably him wondering what made her think of--and bring up--the matter now. “We’ll see. It’s not bothering them if it’s their job.” The mattress creaked, as if he turned to look at her, but she was still facing the wall. “B’sides, I don’t think anyone’s going anywhere for a bit.”

“True.”

This time, the silence remained as it settled over them, and it wasn’t long before she heard his breathing deepen in sleep. It didn’t take long for her to follow suit.

---

It was warm when she woke. Warm and dark.

Adela blinked and rubbed her eyes and quickly figured out the dark part was thanks to burrowing almost completely under the blankets. Warm took a moment longer to register--she was curled in a ball against Heodan’s back.

It shouldn’t have been a surprise; she was inclined to seek out heat sources in her sleep. But under the circumstances, it had her bolting upright, blinking herself awake with heart pounding furiously.

“Morning,” Heodan said, voice rife with amusement.

Oh, wonderful, as if this wasn’t embarrassing enough, he was already awake. “Mornin’,” Adela mumbled around a yawn.

“Did you know you talk in your sleep?” he asked as he rolled on his back. He seemed perfectly happy to stay ensconced in the blankets and looking up at her.

“...I have been told that, yes.” She raked her hair out of her face. She’d forgotten to take out her braid last night and it was in shambles right now. “I don’t suppose I said anything useful, like unsnarling that spell composition that’s been giving me and Aloth fits for a week straight, did I?”

Heodan chuckled. “Not that I heard. Mostly gibberish, with what I think were your siblings’ names occasionally thrown in?” He gave her a searching look. “But it was normal gibberish, so... no Watcher dreams?”

It hit her like a thunderclap as soon as he asked. “No.” They’d been getting worse (Edér shaking her awake, joking about buckets of water worse) for a couple months, and they’d left her alone last night. “You must be magic,” she teased, which made him snort a laugh as he sat up.

“Hardly.” Heodan stretched, shaking free of the blankets. “Does that mean you got a good night’s sleep?”

She nodded, undoing her braid to replait. “For once. Sorry that I, uh, got in your space.”

“Oh, I don’t mind,” he said with a reassuring smile. “The extra warmth was nice, once the fire started dying.”

“Oh!” Adela tied off the half-done braid and scrambled over him, out of bed, to stoke the embers back to life.

Heodan had made it out of bed by the time she succeeded, his focus out the window. “Still snowing,” he commented, nodding that direction.

“Wael’s eyes, really?!” She followed his gaze to see yes, really. “We’ll be here a while, then, I suppose.”

“At least we have plenty to do,” he said with a smile. “And you’re good company.”

“See if you still think that when I go stir-crazy,” she deadpanned. Which might be by the end of the day, depending on if I find interesting enough books. “But you are, too. Good company, I mean.”

His smile widened as he retrieved food for breakfast and her heart skipped a beat in response. Good enough she had no idea how--or if--she was going to keep certain things from spilling into the open.

But it looked like she was about to find out.

#queens fic #adela tecali #heodan #pillars of eternity #heodi #otp: here in my heart #stars rewritten au #aaaahhhhhhhhhhh i'm so happy it's done #this has been sitting in my drafts and haunting me for so long #i thought about it on a weekly basis #I'M FREE #THEY'RE ADORABLE #also ps adi babe i think he might be onto you

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