#I think only my partner has caught the drag queen reference in LuLuRoe | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

zyrafowe-sny · 6 months

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For that "directors commentary" ask game, from LuLuRoe:

Lilith found just the right shade and started applying concealer. Nothing could quite disguise the ridges and grooves left on his skin, but at least now the bright pink scars were the same color as the rest of his face. You’d have to get pretty close to see the disfiguring marks now, and she assumed the list of people willing to do that must be fairly short. Hunter was quiet and thoughtful when she showed him his reflection in her mirror. “Keep that sample." She really was being generous. "The next one is full price.” ***** Her niece did not seem not happy when she came down to the basement later that night. “What exactly did you do with Hunter’s face?” Lilith was bemused. “I just helped him look a little less…off-putting.” “He’s self-conscious now!” Luz fumed. “He didn't need anything more to worry about!” She shrugged. “I’m surprised he didn’t notice all the horrified stares before. Speaking of which,” she cleared her throat, “don’t you think you should do something about your own eyebrow scar?” Luz’s right eyelid was twitching for some reason — maybe Lilith should get her some Avon lavender essential oil if she was under this much stress. “I can find some concealer for you — you’ll need a darker shade than Hunter — and I think we can use an eyebrow pencil to hide that gap a little better.” The twitching increased as Luz took some deep breaths. “Not cool, Aunt Lilith. Not cool.” For the rest of her visit, her niece was a little distant. No matter — while she waited for the remaining deliveries, Lilith occupied herself on the AVEN forums and managed to attend an in-person meeting with Camila as her chauffeur (and moral support). She even had one of her new AVEN friends almost-convinced to help her sell LuLaRoe. Lilith didn’t know why Luz seemed so upset, but she was sure she’d come around in time.

Here's the director's cut ask game.

You picked a doozy of a section in a very niche fic.

First of all, some context.

LuLuRoe wouldn't exist without @sercezgazety/theprincessofdenial. We had a long thread going in the comment section of one of our fics in which she suggested that Lilith might join/create a cult or get into MLM (multi-level marketing). Lilith+MLM made me think of Lululemon (not actually an MLM, as Google later informed me), but further research got me to LuLaRoe (which is an MLM). That inspired me combine Lulu and LuLaRoe to get LuLuRoe, and once I had a punny title, I felt obligated to write the fic. (And yes, I included a Lululemon/LuLaRoe mix up.)

theprincessofdenial often leans into character flaws, and from the get-go this wasn't going to be Lilith at her absolute best. I wanted to write a Lilith who had undergone the character growth of Season 2 and generally meant well, but who was still struggling and would make mistakes along the way. In other words, that oh-no-Lilith-what-are-you-doing feeling is intentional.

I wrote the fic between Thanks to Them and For the Future, so that also informed my take on Lilith's character. The last time I saw Lilith, she still had dyed and straightened black hair. She was less polished than she was during her Emperor's Coven days, but she hadn't quite let go of the mask she had crafted for herself. Appearances still matter to her, and she's not at a point where she's embracing her natural hair. (This isn't to throw shade at anyone who dyes or straightens their hair - that's a perfectly valid choice - but this show has used hairstyle changes to reflect character arcs a few times.) This would probably be a different fic if I wrote it further into Season 3.

Now onto the excerpt.

Oooph, writing this brought back some flashbacks of trying to disguise acne and old chicken pox scars in high school (these days I hardly ever wear makeup but do need to find a good face cream). It's fine to hide scars and/or even out skin tone if that's what you genuinely want, but this is very much Lilith-driven. She's trying to minimize features that could make Hunter stick out - just as she minimized aspects of herself for decades and just as the ubiquitous masks of the Emperor's Coven helped promote uniformity - even though he hasn't really demonstrated any hang ups about his scars before. (It would be a little different if the scars reminded him of Belos and if minimizing the scars helped him heal - like his TTT haircut.)

You’d have to get pretty close to see the disfiguring marks now, and she assumed the list of people willing to do that must be fairly short.

This also pained me to write. In this fic, Lilith and Hunter haven't had much of a chance yet to get reacquainted after leaving the Emperor's Coven. She still associates him with the annoying thorn in her side when she was Coven Head. Back then, he was pretty isolated, and while she sort of knows he's less alone now, she hasn't fully realized the extent of his new support network.

Hunter was quiet and thoughtful when she showed him his reflection in her mirror.

Again, while Hunter's had an on screen identity crisis over his hair, he hasn't seemed too bothered by his scars before. He's relatively new to not wearing a mask that hides his face, so it may just be something he hasn't thought about much. Lilith's giving him a new worry that could activate old masking habits from his Golden Guard days. This hits harder after all the progress he's made finding and accepting himself in TTT.

“Keep that sample." She really was being generous. "The next one is full price.”

Lilith genuinely thinks she's helping him, though there's still the drive to succeed in her new business venture.

*****

Many of my fics have short scenes, so I very much need a scene break marker. I've been going with 5 left-aligned asterisks since that's a little more readable for me as I write on my phone than the classic 3 asterisk centered dinkus. However, I have been considering making a change since "asterisk asterisk asterisk asterisk asterisk" may sound annoying when using a screen reader. I don't love plain lines as a scene break marker, and have been periodically looking for something that's interesting, screen-reader friendly, and not a big AO3 formatting headache.

Her niece did not seem not happy when she came down to the basement later that night. “What exactly did you do with Hunter’s face?”

I like how Lilith and Luz almost immediately claim an aunt/niece relationship in S2, but there's no clear term for Eda.

I'm also a fan of Hunter Noceda, though Luz is quick to defend all of her friends.

Lilith was bemused. “I just helped him look a little less…off-putting.” “He’s self-conscious now!” Luz fumed. “He didn't need anything more to worry about!”

This isn't the first time that Lilith has meant well but made things worse.

Luz has a better understanding of the impact of Lilith's actions, in part because she has a stronger relationship with Hunter. She knows Hunter spent years trying to be the perfect Golden Guard behind a mask, and she doesn't want him to lose whatever self-confidence he's gained outside it.

She shrugged. “I’m surprised he didn’t notice all the horrified stares before.

There are a few things going on: Lilith hasn't spent much time with Hunter since their Emperor's Coven days, she's not always great at reading people (being surrounded by mostly masked scouts for decades didn't help), Hunter's used to drawing some attention as the Golden Guard, and some people in the Demon Realm may be reacting negatively to seeing Hunter because of his history, not so much because of how he looks like.

Speaking of which,” she cleared her throat, “don’t you think you should do something about your own eyebrow scar?” Luz’s right eyelid was twitching for some reason — maybe Lilith should get her some Avon lavender essential oil if she was under this much stress.

Once again, Lilith's not great at reading people and is (relatively benignly) opportunistic.

Also, while Luz has some experience masking and has absolutely felt pressure to conform, she's often resisted. She frequently expresses herself through fashion choices and rarely attempts to minimize differences (she hides her ears and wears a Hexside uniform, but that's basically it). She's not going to alter her appearance unless she wants to.

“I can find some concealer for you — you’ll need a darker shade than Hunter — and I think we can use an eyebrow pencil to hide that gap a little better.” The twitching increased as Luz took some deep breaths.

I can imagine that in Gravesfield Luz has encountered some insensitive reactions to the Nocedas taking in a random white boy. Lilith is absolutely not intending anything but a factual statement about different skin tones and Luz knows that, but I can imagine her comment still bringing up feelings in Luz. I wasn't consciously trying to communicate all that as I worked on this section, but those were thoughts I had as I was writing down the words.

“Not cool, Aunt Lilith. Not cool.”

I couldn't resist the Cool Aunt Lilith reference/joke.

For the rest of her visit, her niece was a little distant. No matter — while she waited for the remaining deliveries, Lilith occupied herself on the AVEN forums and managed to attend an in-person meeting with Camila as her chauffeur (and moral support).

theprincessofdenial suggested Avon as an MLM to include and had an idea for an Avon/AVEN mix up, but I went in a different direction. Camila is always Best Ally.

She even had one of her new AVEN friends almost-convinced to help her sell LuLaRoe.

For a while, my partner would read through my TOH fics and provide minor feedback - kind of like a very light beta reader (my partner isn't big on fanfic but is a big fan of TOH and tries to be supportive of my hobbies). My partner realized that Lilith wasn't actually doing much recruiting even though that's a key element of MLMs, so I went back and added a few lines like that one.

Lilith didn’t know why Luz seemed so upset, but she was sure she’d come around in time.

During Lilith and Eda's estrangement, Lilith convinced herself that Eda would come around eventually if she got captured and was forced to join the Emperor's Coven. She's falling into the same pattern here.

And that's a wrap! Thanks for letting me ramble!

#thanks for the ask!#fanfic ask game #sometimes I write #my fanfic #I think only my partner has caught the drag queen reference in LuLuRoe

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